John Mayer thinks that new management will make him less of a racist douche

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One of my favorite moments in any losing political campaign is when a candidate takes a good, hard look at his declining poll numbers and decides that what he or she really needs is completely new staff. The message it sends is always twofold: first, it says that the candidate is throwing his staff under the bus, blaming THEM and not himself or herself for his lack of popular support. Secondly, it shows just how the candidate is a crappy manager. Anyway, this story about John Mayer reminded me of some of the great losing political campaigns. According to Us Weekly, Mayer is in the market for new management. Because his current management is the reason we think he’s such a douche.

Seems John Mayer now regrets his bad-boy reputation. A source who recently spent time with Mayer tells Us Weekly that John got berated on the street one night for being a serial heartbreaker.

“Girls came up and yelled at him, saying he was a horrible person,” says a source of Mayer, who once held an impromtu press conference with paparazzi to discuss his split with Jennifer Aniston.

Continues the source, “Girls asked how he could treat women the way he did.”

Now John says he is looking for “a new team to manage his image,” adds the insider. “He wants to change people’s perspective on him.”

[From Us Weekly, print edition]

Mayer can get all of the new management he wants, but people are going to hate him until he finds a way to conquer his urge to say crap like “That’s why black people love me…. Someone asked me the other day, “What does it feel like now to have a hood pass?” And by the way, it’s sort of a contradiction in terms, because if you really had a hood pass, you could call it a n—er pass.” And: “My dick is sort of like a white supremacist. I’ve got a Benetton heart and a f-ckin’ David Duke c-ck. I’m going to start dating separately from my dick.” And: “Here’s what I really want to do at 32: f-ck a girl and then, as she’s sleeping in bed, make breakfast for her. So she’s like, “What? You gave me five vaginal orgasms last night, and you’re making me a spinach omelet? You are the sh-t!’” Something tells me new management isn’t going to save that junk.

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Photos courtesy of WENN.

 

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39 Responses to “John Mayer thinks that new management will make him less of a racist douche”

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  1. Happymom says:

    Every time I look at him I feel the need to take a shower. And not a golden one-sorry John. He’s just vile through and through. If any of his songs come on the radio, I change the station. I don’t think there’s anything he can do to redeem himself. Maybe if he never speaks in public again we’ll eventually forget what a total creep he is. But I doubt it.

  2. Anonymous says:

    I’m glad he specified in that quote that the orgasms he gave to his fictional story girl were “vaginal.” You know, lest we get confused about which kind they were. Dumbass.

  3. Diane says:

    He’s just an oily disgusting creep and no one can change that.

  4. Jaana says:

    He is not attractive at all…he looks like he smells of sweat and smoke..ugh

  5. someone says:

    If it walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck…guess what??? no management team in his lifetime will make him anything but a ……..duck

  6. LindyLou says:

    No amount of PR or management is going to wash the stink of douche off this guy.

  7. LittleDeadGirl says:

    Wow, how old is he really? Those quotes are something a drunk 17 year old should be saying … some guys will never grow up and he’s gonna be a douche at 40 the same way he is now. He always gave me the creepy rapist vibe … I’d not want to be alone with him …

  8. lucy2 says:

    Too late, cat’s already out of the bag on that one. 100% gross.

  9. Tif says:

    You people sure do believe any story. Also stop talking about him he’s boring. If you don’t like looking at him don’t click on the story.

  10. The_Porscha says:

    Wow. And now I’m shuddering on my way to work. Gross. Just gross.

  11. Overit says:

    It’s just putting lipstick on a pig….it’s still a pig.

  12. Tif says:

    Don’t worry, he wouldn’t want it @Littledeadgirl.

  13. whitedaisy says:

    That management company would be pulling the greatest miracle on earth if people were to see Mayer as anything other than a misogynistic narcissistic toolbag.
    There is too much out there, documented in his own words, to claim he was “misperceived or misunderstood.” I am guessing a pathologically dysfunctional upbringing.

  14. Cheyenne says:

    Just make music and shut up.

  15. OMJ says:

    If that dude has given even ONE chick an orgasm, I will eat my freaking shoe.
    PSSSST, John- they were faking it!

  16. bluhare says:

    The photo on the front page blurb cracks me up. Just goes to show what little real life I actually have, because I started thinking that he looks like Nero being a bit puzzled when Rome started to burn, but thought that if he played his fiddle a bit more things would turn out all right.

    Note to John: They didn’t.

  17. southerncheerleader says:

    His comments about minorities and women are a part of his make-up.

    A VERY FOUL PERSON.

    A VERY FOUL PERSON.

  18. Hakura says:

    I recently came to an important decision.

    Until someone, somewhere, someday… manages to surpass the sliminess that John Mayer has revealed to us… I will deem him (& only him) the ‘lord of the douche‘.

    All hail Douchelord!

  19. Rita says:

    @Hakura

    Granted every situation has various dimensions and circumstances in the race to be crowned Douchelord but I hardly consider the following runnerups.

    Tiger Woods, Mel Gibson, Charlie Sheen, Eddie Cibrian, Jesse James

    Perhaps we should consider a Supreme Court of Douchery but your point is well taken.

  20. I Choose Me says:

    @Rita. Ha! It was almost like it was a competition wasn’t it? 2010 Year of the Douchelords.

  21. Hakura says:

    @Rita – I definitely see your point. (I never think about Mel Gibson, for some reason I always want to file him into a more seriously deranged category, but can never find the proper ‘descriptive’ term to fit it.) Those other options are certainly deserving.

    Perhaps we need more ‘titles’ of douchelord-ery to hand out. But how to determine a ‘ms. congeniality’ in this contest…

  22. Boat says:

    All I have to say is good luck to his new management.

  23. lulu says:

    I remember Waaaay back to when Mayer started to date Jessica Simpson and I was like “WHaaa”? Are you sure he writes his own lyrics?”.

    I was a true fan of his CD Room for squares.

    Now, not so much.

  24. Who Says says:

    He is very misunderstood and if you really did know him, you wouldn’t believe the crap that out there said about him. Shame on you for being so negative.

  25. poppy says:

    i don’t know him personally (thanks god) but i do know someone that has known him for a long time.
    he’s lonely. he has a giant expensive watch collection.
    too bad he’s an asshat. maybe he wouldn’t be so lonely and “misunderstood”. blech.

  26. Hakura says:

    @Who Says“He is very misunderstood and if you really did know him, you wouldn’t believe the crap that out there said about him. Shame on you for being so negative.”

    I’ve only cast judgment based on the things he’s actually said in interviews. He’s practically the definition of the term ‘over share‘. (It seems like he talks without thinking it through first.) Whether he means for it to or not, it makes him look pretty bad.

    As I don’t know him, & likely never will, that’s all I can go on in terms of an impression.

    @lulu“I was a true fan of his CD Room for squares.”

    I loved that album… Which is why I was so disappointed when I started seeing quotes from him. Since I didn’t keep up with his dating sagas much, I even liked his next album. I can still admit to liking his voice, but I just can’t support his albums when he comes off as such a jerk.

  27. Ally says:

    This proves there is such a thing as bad publicity. He got his name all over, but as a result of his thoughtless blathering, even the few people who liked his ‘music’ turned on him.

  28. whitedaisy says:

    @Hakura@Rita

    I believe that he should share the douchelord crown with Joe Francis.

    All hail the lords of Douche!

  29. mdf says:

    So the blind item about a celebrity who dropped a deuce and ejaculated in a paper bag and left it in the hotel room for the maid to find…was it ever confirmed it was John because I believe he was the most popular guess.
    This guy’s got so many issues I’ll bet shrinks all over the country get hardons when they hear his name.

  30. Hakura says:

    @WhiteDaisy“I believe that he should share the douchelord crown with Joe Francis.

    All hail the lords of Douche!”

    LOL. I Completely forgot about Joe Francis! How the hell could I miss him?

    I think the sad fact is that there are simply too many candidates for ‘Lord of all Douche Lords’. I guess, as with beauty pageants, we could accept ‘sub-category’ winners. xD

  31. Matt says:

    LMAO Rita- perhaps he can go for a 2for1 deal with Eddie Cibrian at the dealership.

  32. AW says:

    Is he really wearing a t-shirt that says “John Mayer”???

  33. Hakura says:

    @AW“Is he really wearing a t-shirt that says “John Mayer”???”

    And this surprises you… why? This is coming from someone who supposedly (as some women who’ve been with him have stated) had to have his own music playing in the background while he was ‘getting busy’. -_-;

  34. JenJen says:

    He’s so done, he’s not even popular at getting bashed anymore.

  35. audiolover says:

    john mayer doesnt deserve this the only difference between him and other singers or celebrties is that he doesnt believe in as much censoership. they spend so much money on perfecting image, somethign mayer’s never bothered with. I admit he does exhibit some douchebag tendencies but he chose to be a musician and he didnt accept all responsibilities that come along with it and I see it as a good thing that he finally understands that he is a public figure and its important to show a public image that people are not disgusted with as hes been doing unknowingly. Also his management really must be fools if they allowed some of the shit that comes out of his mouth be published! SO many artists are fake and I applaud Mayer for being real but he does need to shut up and just sing and play guitar.

  36. yosra says:

    i believe he can redeem himself….i won’t lie i was/am disappointed by a lot of the things he said..but he’s human..not perfect..i wish him nothing but all the best..