Mar 2
'11
Kim Kardashian’s new song “Jam (Turn It Up)”: horrible or not that bad?

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These photos are from Kim Kardashian’s music video shoot for her single, “Jam (Turn It Up)”. Kim put them on her blog – and the styling is hideous and ridiculous. I’ll say it once again – Kim is a pretty girl (or at least she used to be) but she has no idea how to style herself, she had no idea what looks good on her, and she is a terrible model, in general. Anyway, back to the subject at hand – Kim has a music career now. She got together with The Dream (a music producer) and they made beautiful music together. And then they cut this track:

It’s a terrible song. And Kim’s voice is so auto-tuned it’s barely recognizable. But isn’t it funny that even with all of the auto-tuning and all of the crap that’s used to disguise the fact that Kim has a terrible voice, that Kim still sounds utterly bored and vapid? She’s like, “Jam, Jam, whatever, zzzz…”

Kim wrote on her blog, “I can’t believe it’s finally released! This was definitely something that was out of my comfort zone, but I’m so glad that I met with The Dream and that we worked on this project together. It was really an amazing experience recording in the studio and filming the music video and I can’t wait for you all to see the video. You’ll be able to buy Jam on iTunes later today! A portion of the proceeds from the sales of the song will be donated to St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital.” Oh, Jesus. Don’t bring the children into it!!

UPDATE: I just added another video/recording of the song – there was an issue with the other video.

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Photos courtesy of Fame, WENN & Kim’s Celebuzz site.

Written by Kaiser

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Posted in Kim Kardashian, Music


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124 Responses to “Kim Kardashian’s new song “Jam (Turn It Up)”: horrible or not that bad?”

  1. ann says:

    It is absolutely awful. She sounds like an exhausted unenthusiatstic wanna be studio enhanced singer. I can’t stand to listen to her nasal whiny talking so not sure why I gave the song a chance.

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  2. seVen says:

    In the wise words of MK – This gives me the sads.

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  3. irishserra says:

    Well those first pictures sure are terrible.

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  4. Jules says:

    Who would buy this crap? And the music industry wonders why they are collasping?

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  5. Jackson says:

    It sounds like the muzak version of a dance song. But really, I was too distracted by Kim’s natural beauty to listen very carefully. Such a fresh look.

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  6. Eve says:

    I’d rather listen to a symphony of farts.

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  7. irishserra says:

    … And this song is a joke. Her voice is terrible. She doesn’t even sound like she is singing. More like whining.

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  8. andrew says:

    its pretty much what you expect but im sure it will be the biggest hit of 2011

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  9. Rita says:

    She looks a bit like our Weimaraner begging for a snausage. (Please, all you Weimaraner lovers, don’t shank me)

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  10. maya says:

    I did not expect much anyway.

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  11. guesty says:

    Horrible. And the whole charity thing @ the end is pathetic.

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  12. Quest says:

    OMG…as if seeing her wasn’t bad enough, now I have to listen to the bitch. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh the bastards of “The Dream”

    This woman is attempting to tormenting the two of my five basic senses

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  13. krissy says:

    It really is epically bad. Bad song and she does not actully sing AND the cheesiest drum machine I’ve ever heard.

    Also, I would like to know exactly what portion is going to charity.

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  14. Roma says:

    Oh, I finally get it now.

    Kim had a nose job because she needed to fix a deviated septum so she could pursue her true love, putting out shitty auto-tuned songs.

    So don’t hate on her plastic surgery people. She’s just living the dream – with help by the Dream(tm)

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  15. the original bellaluna says:

    Another Lardassian Kartrashian production. Quality stuff, the lot of it. (Heavy sarcasm and an epic eye-roll.)

    I’ll just send my check straight to St. Jude’s, thankyouverymuch. I don’t want to encourage her or that dude that was frolicking in the tropics with his “assistant” while his wife was home with their baby.

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  16. jibjam says:

    come on kim what you thinking while singing this , its horrible. you only look good in your famous tape :)

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  17. Gabriela says:

    “but I’m so glad that I met with The Dream and that we worked on this project together.”

    translates to “I’m so glad that he approved my blowjob”

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  18. OXA says:

    I never thought I wouls say it but I prefer the other Kim’s “Tardy For The Party”

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  19. Bailey says:

    the 2 ferrel cats rumbling in my yard sound better than this.

    I am so sick of the tarantula lashes

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  20. Lashes says:

    I have to admit that I didn’t listen to the song but…her eyelashes are reminding me of a centipede, especially in the last photo. Disgusting.

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  21. Quest says:

    What is this industry coming to (when people with no talent are getting paid):

    Kim singing sorry squarking, whatever???
    Britol and Jesse J are both writing memoirs???
    LL is innocent???
    What next – Charlie Sheen gets his own talk show gig.

    Gawd!

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  22. foobie says:

    Yeah, I don’t get modern pop culture either. It just seems to be going from bad to worse.

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  23. Cherry Rose says:

    The video is no longer available?

    I don’t think I would have watched it anyway. Let’s just hope to god Kim doesn’t try to put out a full length album now.

    The world doesn’t need another famewhore reality star putting out a CD. Heidi Montag 2.0 and just as plastic.

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  24. annie says:

    B..ch please ! “I’m gonna potty then potty some more” ? Is this an ode to her sex tape? Seriously, what is happening in this world???!!!

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  25. Kaiser says:

    I added a new video so you guys can hear the terrible song!

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  26. Cat says:

    *blank stare* “Yeeeeeaahhhh, about Saturday…”

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  27. bagladey says:

    Using a charity like the St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital as a tool to boost sales of this crap is really low.

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  28. BRE says:

    Kim is 30 years old, this sounds like a song that written for Willow Smith

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  29. Bonfire Beach says:

    HAHAHAHA! @Eve and Rita!

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  30. LOVE ANGELINA says:

    Its really bad. It shouldn’t be but the lack of energy in her voice is pretty apparent, she isn’t even trying to sing, she is just saying the words. The beat is good, I could party to it, but it was pretty bad with her singing. I mean even Heidi Montag had a good song so I don’t know what went wrong. In the right hands, say of someone like Jen Lopez or Rhianna this would have been my jam.

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  31. Michael Kelly says:

    I honestly do like the Kardashians; they amuse me, so I wanted to like this song but it really sucked. Kim does not even sound like she is interested in singing.

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  32. Melissa says:

    This song is AWFUL!!! Couldn’t the auto tuning change her nasaly voice? It’s about as good as Paris Hilton’s music…

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  33. Marjalane says:

    I’m with original bellaluna- I’ll be sending my check straight to St.Jude’s, which I’m sure is utterly horrified to be mentioned in the same sentence with this idiot.

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  34. Zelda says:

    @original bellaluna
    @marjalane

    hmmm…how many other people do you think would send directly to St Jude’s? If I knew how to go about this kind of thing, I would set up a website for people to send money directly there, and advertise it to see who could make more money first–my site or her sh*tty album

    This is where those idiots at 4chan could put their time and troubles to good instead of evil–and still get to make Kim Kardashian look stupid in the process!

    Celebitchy should set this up. It would be some good publicity… KK couldn’t even be mad about a race to raise charity funds…. DO IT GUYS!

    I like her gold bracelet, though.

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  35. snappyfish says:

    I want the last 4:18 of my life back……

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  36. chunkstyle says:

    she makes ke$ha sound like a musical genius powerhouse! (and I’m sort of a ke$ha fan) Girlfriend is so boring and unexcited, totally agree with you. Turn it upzzzzz

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  37. KsGirl says:

    Holy shitballs that’s bad. And I agree this woman has no idea how to style herself – she goes OTT on the styling (clothes, makeup, etc.) when her face and body are themselves OTT and she needs to tone down the outer layers a little. Imo.

    But she hung out with Bieber so maybe I’m just jealous. Yes, I am.

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  38. The Truth Fairy says:

    I gave it a chance – I listened to the entire song with an open mind. That said, this is really really awful and I would like those 5 minutes of my life back!

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  39. StraightfromA says:

    (insert evil laugh)Kim K. this song is everything I thought it would be- Read: it sucks!

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  40. Maritza says:

    A really good singer must sound good without the music and synthesizers, I’d like to hear what she sounds like a capella. Turn me off is right!

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  41. ctkat1 says:

    She sounds like a drugged baby singing.

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  42. Rasputina says:

    Auto tune autotune-auto tu-tu-tu-ne. Woman, the fact that you can somewhat keep a tune does not make you a singer, Katface. Also, tequila? Well, considering my first and last experience with tequila, Kim, shoo now.

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  43. KLO says:

    This is bad. Even for her.

    I actually hoped she wouldn’t suck at this.

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  44. Anon73 says:

    WOWWWWW….this song **TOTALLY** changes my opinion of Kim !! she is **SO** talented and has an amazing voice !! she is *clearly* the Armenian-American J-Lo !! plus no one can doubt her street cred, even if she grew up in a cushy SoCal mansion, went to private schools and had Hollywood connections, afterall she has dated hot black men AND wears braids !!

    … NOT

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  45. Truth says:

    I love kim’s video…Oh, I didn’t see her sing in the video I’m watching, but she moves pretty good

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  46. Cha Cha Loca says:

    LOL @ Marjalane, I thought the same thing too. What an asshat this chick is.

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  47. TeeTee says:

    horrible, smdh.

    they need to stop the release!!

    I’m sure all of her mini me’s will buy it.

    no thx, I never want to hear it again.

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  48. curmudgeon says:

    Anything involving this woman is horrible. Anything.

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  49. Brittany says:

    Just a portion of the money?

    First off, it’s probably going to bomb just like Heidi’s did and won’t even make that much.

    Secondly, does she really need any more money? She should donate 100% of those proceeds.

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  50. Alexsi says:

    The song is so Terrible I could not listen past 45sec. I agree Brittany.

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  51. Marie says:

    @Eve bwhahahaa (choke, cough, snort) I spit my burrito on my screen!! LMAO ty ty ty.

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  52. Bailey says:

    I don’t know how some of you actually listened to the whole thing. I applaud you!

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  53. Liana says:

    of course she’s seeing “angels in her eyes…” They’re her damned eyelashes. God this sucks on so many levels and I don’t even hate on Kim.

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  54. Dea says:

    Kim K is a pathetic, unscrupulous, delusional human being that would do anything absurd for the money.

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  55. Katya says:

    She makes Britney Spears sound like Sarah Brightman.

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  56. the original bellaluna says:

    @ Zelda – St. Jude’s has an 800 number to accept donations: 800-805-5856

    Their website is http://www.stjude.org and there’s a link to donate on their site as well.

    Come on, everybody, let’s do this! Money to St. Jude’s, and never having to hear KK “sing” – it’s win-win!

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  57. Xx says:

    Symphony of farts, ha ha ! Good one

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  58. Shay says:

    She just makes me want to hurl. Cannot stand her. She was probably the main inspiration for Pink writing ‘Stupid Girls’.

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  59. DSMR says:

    It is beyond words bad. Sounds like she copied Jully Blacks remix of “DJ Play my Song” slapped her hidious repetitive hooks on it and called it done. Eeewwwwwwuu I can’t get the funk of this one off.

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  60. jr says:

    first two pics are really nice…..love the bo derek styling…at least it isnt seen everywhere!!!!

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  61. alex says:

    I LOVE THIS SONG! YOU HATERS MAKE ME SICK! THIS SONG IS NO WORSE THAN ANY OF THE OTHER GARBAGE MUSIC YOU DANCE TO IN CLUBS! HAHAHA!

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  62. Mshuffleupagus says:

    Made it through about 20 seconds before an uncontrollable shiver made it across my entire body. Why. Why is this a thing.

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  63. Candice says:

    I dont know which one is worse, the song or the pictures? She looks horrible.

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  64. Dizzle says:

    Wow, she looks like Dave Chappelle’s impersonation of Rick James! Look up the episode if you don’t remember

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  65. jackie says:

    I just hurt myself laughing.

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  66. LondonLady says:

    oh rick james, classic! She just sounds stoned, and the lyrics are SO boring. At least better than speidi, you have to give her creds for that, it could be worse.

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  67. Bella says:

    Why is it after looking at that first picture all that’s going through my head is “I’m Rick James, bitchy!!”?

    *Edit ~ Dizzle,didn’t read the comments before I posted. Thought the same thing!

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  68. GIA says:

    thanks Kaiser. you’ll be hearing from my lawyers shortly. I’m suing you for loss of enjoyment of life and pain and suffering. that’s just plain cruel to put that out there.

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  69. gwc says:

    ‘They play in my jam’
    Is ‘Jam’ code?

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  70. raggaqueen says:

    heah i like the idea of giving the money straight to the charity, omg let’s save our selves from this inhumane tragedy.

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  71. June says:

    She sounds sleepy and bored…and perhaps slightly intoxicated but still remembers the words.

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  72. Newbie says:

    Ridiculous. My tween sister would think it was immature. Yikes.

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  73. ♥Natalie♥ says:

    No Kim I will not turn you up but I will turn you off that was just horrible!

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  74. khaveman says:

    Kim sounds so vapid and bored. Was she sitting down in the sound booth, getting her nails done? She sounds like she gave about 15 percent effort. CRAP. “They playin my crap…DJ…”

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  75. Liana says:

    I LOVE THIS SONG! YOU HATERS MAKE ME SICK! THIS SONG IS NO WORSE THAN ANY OF THE OTHER GARBAGE MUSIC YOU DANCE TO IN CLUBS! HAHAHA!

    ************

    I DON’T DANCE IN CLUBS! HAHAHA!

    (my eyes are stuck in the back of my head from rolling them again, dammit.)

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  76. Evelyn says:

    I like Kim Kardashian (sue me) but oh my, this is just bad. It’s just poorly written, poorly produced, poorly sung, poorly executed all around. She should take out the cornrows and put down the microphone

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  77. AmyUSA says:

    ahahaha .. omg, it’s so bad it’s funny!

    @Evelyn: I agree, I do like Kim (actually, all the Kardashians hehe), but that was soooo bad all round!

    @gwc: so that’s what it is, I thought I was mishearing LOL – playing in my jam … stupidest lyrics ever!!

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  78. Sassy says:

    For serious? Is she singing “they play in my jam?” And her jam is…? The Dream couldn’t auto-tune out her stupid nasal voice?

    Fail. Big fucking FAIL.

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  79. Bill Hicks is God says:

    She’s trying to do “something” Armenian with this song. I hope that something Armenian ends up with System of a Down kicking her in her fat can.

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  80. Misty G says:

    For some reason, this song reminds me of “Whip My Hair”… But for the fact that Whip My Hair is a better song. Kim is no Willow Smith.lol.

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  81. Kim says:

    And i thought Heidi was a terrible singer! This is HORRIBLE!! She has an awful voice.

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  82. em says:

    I really wish i could like nearlly all of these comments, hilarious!!

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  83. CeeCee says:

    LOL Dizzle totally Rick James!!!
    ‘here hold mah drank bitch’

    oh gosh I just cannot beleive it’s attempting to sing now. Can’t she just do appearances to raise money for charity rather than subject us to shit fuck man I can’t take it anymore!

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  84. Richi says:

    Has she fixed up her false lashes to the lower lids too? can this be done? i thought only the upper lid can be fixed!

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  85. Nikki says:

    Oh. My. God. Garbage. Pure garbage. Embarrassingly bad. Both the “music” and her styling. Jesus Christ Kim, wtf??

    P.S. Loved the “symphony of farts” comment btw.

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  86. insidescoop says:

    this song makes me want to take a nap

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  87. Paige says:

    wow she sounds exhausted! even in the chorus!

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  88. SHump says:

    When is this farking family going to disappear and leave us alone?!! I swear on all that is good in the universe, if I ever get my hands on Ryan Seacrest, I’m going to beat him half to death with his own blow dryer and finish the job by suffocating him with Simon Cowell’s moobs. WTF did the universe do to him to deserve this shit?!

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  89. Dea says:

    @ shump – lol that was funny and right :) I wish Ryan Seacrest’s career goes to toilet some day just for promoting this trash all over. Carma is a b..ch I am sure it will come some day. I bet Ryan is hiding his money at the church of Kris too.

    The “Symphony of farts” is genious.
    To add to my comment above as I really hate these trashy chicks. They made $65 million last year. I am curiouos to know how much of that went to St. Jude Hospital? I bet none. They are using St. Jude for their own interest as they know this CD will sell shit. I just can not believe that some people would watch their show when these people are the most hypocrites, trashy, unscrupulous on this earth. Can’t wait for the day to see this family bankrupt. I hope IRS audit that church of Kris for good. Thats why churches or any other religious building or cults should never be allowed to be operating tax free as people like Kardashians will hide their money in this way.

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  90. Robb7 says:

    Right, Brittany, she should be donating 100% of the proceeds (can’t believe anyone would buy this crap!). The “portion of the proceeds” could be as low as 2%. This lard-ass divorcee made millions — she’s just using St. Jude’s as ploy to up the sales of her song. How low can this trash bag sink before “her fans” realize she’s just raking in the cash at their expense.

    Truly beyond despicable!!!

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  91. Lisa says:

    @Kaiser- HORRIBLE!!!! And OMG don’t tell me the second pic after the vid looks like someone holding their penis ready to get it sucked by Katface.

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  92. Lisa says:

    Haha! I just tweeted her and told her her song sucked and she couldn’t sing.

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  93. NancyPants says:

    This foray into the world of music is just another bulls#*t move by these money-grubbing, talentless shanks. They just keep bringing ‘em into the tent and the suckers keep buying their crap!! When will these little tweens be enlightened by their parents (who are paying) finally say ENOUGH!!

    This time they hedged their bets by tying sales into donating a portion (probably 3%) of the proceeds to St. Jude’s Hospital. Why not all the proceeds which will probably total $112.

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  94. BUCK says:

    Sorry to say this ,but the truth is take the music away from Kim or Britney Spears and you have Nothing! Not mad at them,make that money. Hey palin got rich off stupid people, why not Kim and Britney. Wish i could.

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  95. justsayin says:

    this is just crap! WHAT IS THE MUSIC INDUSTRY COMING TOO!!!! no talent people..

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  96. Robocop says:

    Hey it’s just capitalism at its worst! Kim has always delivered the goods — rip-off credit card, crappy clothes made in China that fall apart, drugs (legal speed) to lose weight, exercise tape (where she doesn’t break a sweat) to lose more weight — and then tells everyone to embrace their curves, like she does. Confusing — not really — just Kim being her greedy, trashy, tranny self!

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  97. launicaangelina says:

    this is fucking horrible.

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  98. not good. really, really not good. it’s like paris hilton trying to make a movie though- it just wouldn’t be enough if she does a mediocre job at it. she doesn’t have the kind of rapport with the public that would allow her to do halfway job, let alone a bad job. i think everyone was expecting lousy music, and she delivered.

    jam.. jam… jam… zzzz… there’s just nothing happening in this track.

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  99. Laura says:

    Didn’t Kim say in an interview once that she knew she couldn’t sing? Too lazy to late it up, but I could swear it exists.

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  100. ab says:

    I had to turn it off when I heard a clearly distaught and startled person loudly screaming “no, no! noooooo!” at the sound of the song being played. I then realized, after a few deep breaths into a paper bag, the person screaming in agony was me. :P It was really hard to read the comments thru the laughter tears in my eyes picturing a “symphony of farts”! hahahahahahaha!

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  101. CB Rawks says:

    @Rita
    “She looks a bit like our Weimaraner begging for a snausage. (Please, all you Weimaraner lovers, don’t shank me)”

    I won’t, I am very happy with the word snausage. :D

    Also weimaraners are so pretty! (I learned that from watching Best in Show.) Lucky girl! I want a doggy. Sigh. Not that my cat isn’t awesome, because she is ten pounds of awesome in a five pound bag.

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  102. Kasey says:

    I agree with KAISER and LOVE ANGELINA (sorry if anyone else said the same thing but I didn’t care to read all of the comments just yet-saving that for my long bus ride tomorrow). The beat and jam itself are rock-worthy but there is NO energy from her voice. She sounds both bored and boring. It’s quite amazing actually.

    BTW, I never noticed until these series of pics that she kinda looks like ScarJo. Am I the only one seeing that?

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  103. KarenC22 says:

    AMAZING!!!!!! Simply amazing, Kim. Who knew you had this hidden talent — of gross self promotion!! The song sucks and you definitely do!!

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  104. Roy says:

    I hate to say it but, even Kim Zoliack can sing better than Kim Kardashian. Kim word of advise keep to the shopping and sex tapes.

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  105. True to KK says:

    I loved this song. Kim has a wonderful tone in her voice. The lyrics are fabulous and it makes me want to go out with friends and party! What a heart this woman has to donate money to St-Judes. She is fabulous in everything she does. I need to get my meds….the men in the white coats are coming…they are coming…U really need to be psychotic to even think this is anything but utter nonsense!

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  106. Marytere says:

    Oh my… This is sooo, I don’t know, atrocious, horrible, wrong, ear bleeding, you name it.
    BTW, in every single picture I’ve ever seen, she NEVER closes her mouth?? why? too much botox, collagen, silicone? Is she showing off her teeth? Or is just a simple (horrible, terrible) pose?

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  107. Galina says:

    i thought she had a ” team” that worked for and helped her. Where the hell were they when she was recording this ? This song is sooo bad , it is actually embarrassing .

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  108. joselizette06njPhillyTri-State says:

    your comments here crack me up always on kim kardashian.Why is kim kardashian at all singing,she can do other worthy sh-t for charity.damn.kim kardash is not a singer!!!!!!!!! why is the industry just
    lettin ANY 1 sing,my god Much real song talent available and the DREAM WORK wit her,clearly he is a azz chaser,and very talented producer but just using her to MAKE money off dumb azz white fools
    who are buyin kim song JAM,how pathetic
    cabron puta ella es, hate kim kardashian
    and she is NOT BEAUTIFUL TO ME EITHER.
    drag queen too much make up kim wear
    she look drag.

    i am so happy i am not alone.it sound as if she is a nasal stuff elephant.her red wig or hair highlites are cute in kim hair
    but i can’t stand kim kardashian song.glad i am not the only one
    AND YES THIS IS A GUY SAYIN IT,who look good and has a nice ride nice HOUSE and i do not LOVE or LIKE KIM.NOT ALL MEN LOVE KIM KARDASHIAN.she already in her 30s still is NOT married,this is a clear
    reason why.she think she is ALL DAT
    real men know she is not so will jus b f—-kin her then toss her outside,she cant sing,and makin a zillion bucks
    already now this song shit has to go
    and so do you KIM.
    peace
    from
    jose and lizette
    philly
    nj tri-state.

    NOT A KIM KARDASHIAN FAN.
    she is so washed up now.
    THIS SONG IS PROOF
    1

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  109. Milena says:

    I love Kim, I think she’s really talanted =)) I kinda like her voice, shoot me for having bad taste if you want. Maybe I’m a bit partial since I’m like her biggest fan, but I’m not changing my mind. And I like her styling btw :)

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  110. Thanks so much for the wonderful post on us! We’re going to send this around .The blog looks great!

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  111. nicki says:

    The song sucks and she looks nasty come on whats up with the braids.You look trashy are people not honest with you or what? Because if someone told you that was hot they so lied. She needs to turn down her ego. Sorry Kim but you suck and honestly I think your sister Kourtney is so much better looking. Come on Kim take the makeup down a few notches Sometimes you look like a drag queen ( sorry to insult you ladys lol)

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  112. Radio Host says:

    Kim should have sent her Ex Kris a music video or maybe Kim could have broke up with Kris like this hilarious you tube “Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries wedding snow globe plays wedding m” of ebay item 170745393108

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