Over the past month, Britney Spears has been doing press for her new album, Femme Fatale. That press has been… odd, to say the least. If you look through some of Britney’s major interviews lately, the interviews rarely, if ever, take place face to face. Britney (“Britney”) answered questions on her Twitter account, and she sounded… unlike the Britney we know. It sounded more like one of Brit’s handlers was just answering those questions for her. Then, for her Out Magazine interview, the questions were submitted to Britney via email, and she answered via email. From what I can see, the only face-to-face interview she’s done so far is the one for V Magazine, in which she only answered a handful of questions.
So… basically, I’m accusing Britney’s team of pulling a not-so-fast one on the general public. Britney isn’t really doing her own press, in my opinion. If it was any other celebrity, media outlets wouldn’t allow it. So why are they letting Britney get away with it now? Because of her mental issues? Because we collectively feel bad for her? Because she’s Britney, bitch? Whatever. All I know is that I rolled my eyes and giggled at Britney’s latest “interview” – an Us Weekly “25 Things You Don’t Know About…” piece. I have to hand it to whoever is writing this junk, they actually make an effort to use Brit’s “voice”.
1. My favorite ice cream is orange sherbet.
2. I take two baths a day.
3. I love chewing ice.
4. I make a mean fake dinosaur when playing with the two loves of my life, Sean, 5, and Jayden, 4.
5. My favorite flowers are white lilies.
6. I’m a huge fan of animated films.
7. I can eat chocolate morning, noon and night.
8. I love boutique shopping.
9. I have more than 50 purses in my closet.
10. I have more than 50 jackets in my closet.
11. I love to draw.
12. I enjoy cooking spaghetti.
13. I’m secretly a photographer.
14. I’m addicted to shopping online.
15. I collect dolls.
16. I love Adele’s new album.
17. I really want to learn another language.
18. I played basketball — guard — in high school.
19. I don’t own a cellphone.
20. I’m constantly cleaning my house.
21. My favorite drink is sweet ice tea.
22. I love I Love Lucy.
23. I make my own bed every morning.
24. I made the first move on [beau] Jason Trawick.
25. I wrecked my mom’s Lexus in high school.
[From Us Weekly]
No go back and re-read it with a twang, and add “y’all” to every line. Oh, and change all the my’s to mah’s.
Just a few points though – are we supposed to believe that Britney bathes twice a day? No, Brit. We’ve seen your busted, greasy weave. Not buying it. Also, “I made the first move on Jason Trawick.” God, I actually believe that, but I just don’t want to picture it. Britney was still in pretty bad shape when she and Jason first got together – how in the world did she come on to him? Did she just rub herself on his leg and put his hand on her trashy weave? Ugh.
Here are some shots of Britney for her album:
Photos courtesy of WENN & The Daily Mail (Brit‘s promotional shots).
Written by Kaiser
Posted in Britney Spears
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