Linnocent: “Marilyn never wanted to be a celebrity. Neither do I.”


Here are some more photos of Linnocent being crackie in Paris – most of these pics are from the weekend, where she partied with some A-listers and Terry Richardson. Considering there aren’t any photos of her today, I wonder if she hasn’t already moved on to a new city. Page Six has an interesting little story about Linnocent partying on Saturday night – apparently, “someone” sent Lohan 40 magnums of Dom Pérignon. She probably got through that in about an hour, right?

Lindsay Lohan insists she’s still on the wagon, but somebody sent 40 magnums of Dom Pérignon to her table at the Mister H at L’Arc Paris club. Lohan, in Paris for fashion week, joined the party put on in partnership with Morgans Hotels’ Mister H and L’Arc on Saturday night. While others were sending bubbly to her table in four batches of 10 magnums each, she didn’t appear to touch a drop. Also there: Clive Owen, Mary-Kate Olsen, Ciara and Vivienne Westwood.

[From Page Six]

CLIVE OWEN?!? Linnocent was at the same party as Clive Owen? Bitch. As for “she didn’t appear to touch a drop”… bullsh-t.

By the way, do you remember how Linnocent was asked to write an essay about Marilyn Monroe for a new coffee table book called Marilyn: Intimate Exposures? A while back, we had some excerpts of the essay, and now we have the whole cracked-out thing. It’s pretty rough, and it’s not really about Marilyn at all. It’s just about Linnocent and how she’s just like Marilyn.

I was twelve and watching the film “Niagara” over and over again when I was shooting The Parent Trap. I didn’t refer to it as film noir then. I just thought it was dark and full of emotion. Marilyn was the beautiful bad girl in that tight, rose-colored dress. The character she played was strong and taking control, which I unconsciously knew at that young age was a necessary quality for a woman. I had seen what my mother, whom I love, had gone through with my father. She, I and my brother Michael, my sister Aliana, and my youngest brother Dakota were in a constant state of uncertainty. I would have to put myself between him and my siblings.

I can understand the photographer Bernard of Hollywood’s statement, “it took a superhuman effort to be Marilyn.” I identify. Without any real family to come home to and no education, Marilyn managed to have her dream. The dream of a little girl looking out of an orphanage window at the RKO sign, and promising herself, “There must be thousands of girls sitting alone like me, dreaming of becoming a movie star. But I’m not going to worry about them. I’m dreaming the hardest.”

People in their mind have created who I am and act as if there is no real person inside of me. Just like Marilyn, who created the blond sex goddess on camera…. Marilyn never wanted to be a celebrity. Neither do I. I started working in commercials, when I was three. I always wanted to be in great films. I had always thought that movie stars were in films that would last forever in your mind. But now the films don’t. I don’t want to be remembered as someone who just wanted to be photographed, who goes out at night, and gets in trouble.

Look, I never had a normal high school life. I was home schooled for two years, never had a high school prom or went to college. I was just sort of acting out that period of time I never had, and I made some bad choices. So all the tabloids, just like Marilyn, keep harping on my mistakes. Heath Ledger once said to me, “It’s build you up to knock you down and that’s all it is. And you just have to see if you can stand through it.”

Marilyn said she had no foundation. But she said she was really working on it. I’ve been trying to do the same thing. But sometimes a relationship doesn’t work out like you’d hoped. The tabloids don’t give you a chance. They don’t want to know who you are inside. If everything’s OK with you, who wants to hear about it? I believe in myself and I’m a good actress.

It took time for Marilyn to be taken seriously as an actress. She risked everything and broke her contract with FOX Studios, demanded more money, approval of directors, better scripts, more respect, and formed Marilyn Monroe Productions. That was really empowering for a woman in the ‘50s. Marilyn was not a victim. She took control. And we remember her, 50 years later, for her “great films.”

[Lohan’s ‘Intimate Exposures’ essay via Perez Hilton]

“Move that corpse, I’m Lindsay Lohan!” That’s what it is. What many of you have said – and I couldn’t agree more – is that the family Lohan (specifically Dina and Lindsay) simply have NO SHAME. They don’t realize or acknowledge when they’re acting inappropriately. How could they feel shame when obviously NOTHING is ever their fault? This essay is obviously not Linnocent’s fault either. Someone obviously forced Linnocent to come in and take a dump on Marilyn Monroe’s corpse (not to mention Heath Ledger’s).

By the way, I’m not trying to pretend that Marilyn didn’t have a drug problem, but I just hate the way that this trained, talented and inspirational actress has become the poster girl for every cracked-out blonde dumbass in the world. Bitches, you’re not Marilyn.





Photos courtesy of WENN & Terry Richardson’s Diary.

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139 Responses to “Linnocent: “Marilyn never wanted to be a celebrity. Neither do I.””

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  1. Samigirl says:

    Christ on a cracker, does her family have to mention The Parent Trap, Heath Ledger, and Marilyn Monroe in every interview they do? Apparently that is the interview trifecta for them.

    Also, I lol’ed at the title. She’s never wanted anything but to be a celebrity.

  2. LittleFATMe says:

    WTF?!?! She needs to stop! Ugh and gross.

  3. dorothy says:

    That works out great then, cause you no longer are.

  4. imabrat says:

    It’s gone beyond hilarious, this comparing of herself to Marilyn Monroe. Now it’s simply droll.
    If you don’t want to be a “celebrity”, get out of the spotlight. Go do something productive; start a children’s theater, volunteer for something other than court mandated time.
    In other words, look beyond the mirror Lohan. Your looks are going downhill quickly and you are not an actress.

  5. Cherry Rose says:

    She really doesn’t realize that her days as an actress are over. God, she is so delusional.

    And obviously Lindsay wrote this essay because she is super pissed that Michelle Williams got the part of Marilyn Monroe and she didn’t. She’s trying to show that her and Marilyn are more similar, and thus the role should have gone to her.

  6. brin says:

    All aboard for the Crackie train to Delusionville.

  7. serena says:

    Those cracked-out lips are going to explode one day.

    All I have to say about this is: poor Heath Ledger.

  8. dina says:

    There is one thing I don’t get it. Why do some people wont to be associate with her? Some on business level. Why? Some on personal level. Why? For fun? She can’t afford to pay for all that crap.

  9. Kimbob says:

    Quote from Lindsay’s “essay”: ‘I don’t want to be remembered as someone who just wanted to be photographed, who goes out at night, and gets in trouble.’

    Bwahahahahaha!!!!! It’s funny…my Mom has always told me, watch what people DO, not what they SAY. People ALWAYS do what they want to.

  10. RocketMerry says:

    “Neither do I!”

    If by “neither” you mean “Coke and Meth”. Is that a new druggie code?

  11. Zombie Nurse says:

    I was trying to read a little Celebitchy at work all sneeky like, read that title and could not stop myself from saying, “Bitch, please!” out loud. Really loud.

  12. ladybert62 says:

    “I was just sort of acting out that period of time I never had, and I made some bad choices.”

    Looks like you havent learned much linnocent.

  13. judyjudy says:

    I’m a peaceful, nonviolent woman and normally don’t care enough about these celebs to feel any kind of emotion about them. But damn it, this trick is so irritating I’d love nothing more than to slap her across her fool face.

  14. Cindy says:

    Lord she is useless!!! I agree, stop comparing your cracked out selves to Marilyn. She worked hard, trained and studied her craft. She was also someone that was honest with the camera. She gave her all to the role and people took more and more! Lilo is nothing like Marilyn!
    All I can say is thank the lord she hasn’t tried to come out with another album!!!!!

  15. LittleDeadGrrl says:

    I love when people pretend to talk about something else but really are talking about themselves the whole time. I learned NOTHING about Marilyn in that essay and everything about the Lohan. Jesus, her and Megan Fox need to stop mentioning Marilyn every chance they get … to quote the Kaiser … “Bitches, you’re not Marilyn”

  16. Dana says:

    Didn’t want to be a celebrity?!? HA HA HA HA. I guess she wants to be a comedienne now ’cause that is the funniest s**t she has ever said.

  17. Lem says:

    KiLo & MaMo have nothing in common!
    Can you imagine?
    Sneaking pantyless from VIP bedrooms & boardrooms. Nearly od- ing with a pop icon. Busted with drugs. Naked photog shoots. Public humiliation and disintegration over failed public relationship. P*mping. Daddy issues. Drug issues. Drink issues. Self esteem issues. Horrible acting. Boning for parts. Relying on others to pay her bills. Dependant on others for housing, clothing, jewels, travel. Most long term address is a hotel… Body parts made of fake, ridiculous blonde hair.
    Nothing alike. Nothing alike at all. C’ Mon

  18. gloaming says:

    Sorry in advance guys, but in that second photo with Terry Richardson I immediately thought she’s giving him some below the waist action.

  19. Dibba says:

    FYI, comparing yourself to Marilyn Monroe doesn’t make you at all like MM.

  20. Nanz says:

    I don’t think MM’s dream was to die of a drug overdose (suicide, murder or whatever the cause may have been). THAT is what really pisses me off. My understanding of MM is that she was NOT happy and NOT living her dream. She was used by men for her looks. People took advantage of her and she never truly knew if they loved her or her celebrity. That part of her story is more like LL than the beautiful actress part of MM’s story. LL is delusional. ‘I don’t want to be a celebrity, I just want to make good films.’ Bullsh*t! She wants to win an Oscar by the time she’s 30 – she said it herself. It’s never been about the films – it’s always been about the celebrity for her. She is so self-involved she can’t even write a tribute to MM, but rather makes it all about her and what a gd victim she is. Gross.

  21. Jackson says:

    Ugh. And she looks like a freaking alien in that close-up with the oversized shades. Dumbass.

  22. Green_Eyes says:

    OMG! This Ramesh re has no shame! Marilyn must be rolling over in her grave. There is a big difference between truly coming from NO home and pulling yourself up as a young adult like Marilyn did as opposed to Success this crack head had as a child and let drugs ruin. No way can this mess we know as Lindsay can ever hold a candle to Marilyn Monroe…nor any comparisons, except in the warped drugged out mind of her own, or Dina’s warped delusional mind. Both can dream on…

  23. Incredulous says:

    Do they still make Danielle Steel TV movies because I think that’s what she’ll be left with soon enough.

    Well, that and an “accidental” sex tape.

  24. Rhiley says:

    I am so sick of freakin’ twats like Lindsay Lohan acting like they are victims of their own bad choices in life. I have no sympathy for people who cannot take responsibilites for their actions. Look Lindsay, if you don’t want to be in the gossip columns, want to stop being photographed snorting blow in the windows of Manhatten penthouses, want to go to college, want a more normal life, then by all means, please create that for yourself. Nobody is stopping you but you. A lot of attention is often focused on the negatives of fame and Hollywood but there are also a lot of positives. Emma Stone and Bryce Dallas Howard for example are young, talented, and seemingly have their lives together. Look at Drew Barrymore. She experienced so much negative at such a young age but didn’t play the victim and is now a Hollywood elite: actor, producer, director. Lindsay just doesn’t get it and probably never will. I will give her this, her parents are crappy, but there comes a time when we can no longer use crappy parents as an excuse for the mistakes we make as adults. Lindsay, you are an adult.

  25. Addie says:

    I’m sure it has been edited a lot, but the essay is pretty well writen (exept for all the JUST LIKE ME parts)

    I just couldn’t belive all this was coming from someone like Lindsay who looks like she can’t put a sentance together on paper let alone an essay.

    Her lifestyle does not correspond with all that was written about her ‘hopes and future plans’

  26. Thea says:

    Doesnt she have a court hearing in a few weeks? Cant wait to see how that works out for her? Will she loose her passport again? Will she even show up? Let the countdown begin….

  27. Amanda says:

    If she no longer wants to be a celebrity, then stop acting. Find a regular job. Move out of LA and people will slowly leave you alone.

  28. dorothy says:

    Oh please…her whole life has been an attempt by her and her mother to become a celebrity. Who does she really think she is fooling? What a joke she’s become.

  29. becky says:

    out os All the things she has ever said, this one bothers me most! for real?

  30. becky says:

    her face really settled though, right? it’s more similar to her Mean Girls face than its been ever since

  31. lucy2 says:

    Well said, Rhiley.
    That family has no shame, and no brains. The truth is so painfully obvious, yet they think no one sees it.

  32. Blood Red Witch says:

    The “I am just like MM” crap just makes me roll my eyes! I am more like MM than her! Which means Linnocent, YOU ARE NOTHING LIKE MM! MM studied acting until the day she died, took care of her looks and WORKED OUT!
    Another thing, you can really see where Lindsay is balding in a few of these pics. Give up the extensions and buy a wig already! Her dad has more real hair than her. urk

  33. Kelly says:

    @Rhiley, the Drew Barrymore comparison is a good one. Being a childhood star is no excuse for messed-up behavior. Children who were seriously abused can grow up to have healthy, productive lives, so it’s hard to feel bad for someone who’s crying because she didn’t go to prom. Boo-f’ing-hoo.

    This “essay” was completely chaotic and rambling. The only thing it got right is that Marilyn worked damn hard to get where she was, she bought her own damn diamonds and clothes, and – by all accounts – she was a serious person who read books and stuff, and lived a fairly modest lifestyle.

  34. Callli Pygian says:

    Would someone please inform this cracked- out skankasaurus that fame-whoring is not the equivalent of celebrity?

  35. G says:

    The fact is, that Lindsay’s career as a lead in film acting ended around 2006- 07 when she delivered a lack lustre performance and scant box office in Just my Luck. Partener this with an unprecedented public spanking for her behavior on the set of Georgia Rules.

    The industry decided THEN that she wasn’t worth investing in and the later released total turkey, Labor Pains sealed her fate. No adult TALENT and no BOX OFFICE.

    She went on to kill her second opportunity at a career on TV by being a total bitch on the set of Ugly Betty.

    It’s just tabloid fame since then and let’s face it, it’s been gravy.

  36. MissyA says:

    Jesus Christ. . .

    Dumb bitch doesn’t even have the presence of mind to be embarrassed that she totally hijacked her “hero’s” memorial. Dollars to donuts she feels like a literary giant.

    Brainless twat.

  37. Sillyone says:

    Her nose! Oh my gosh, that pic with her in the glasses and the one below it I can’t get past her nose!

    Now look at how far back her hair line is in the close up pick of her in the glasses, that is almost to the center of her head. I swear she doesn’t have any natural hair anymore it is all extensions. She will soon have to start wearing a wig because there will be absolutely nothing for the extensions to glue on to.

    And her lips still look like a dogs puckered butt hole (sorry Kasier it’s the truth and a perfect description please don’t hit the ban button again :) )

  38. Hautie says:

    Were as her makeup has greatly improved on her jaunt to Europe. Is there a reason for the corpse color lip stick? It truly is ghastly looking. But her eye makeup has looked great.

    I find it hard to believe that The Olsen’s would let Lohan near them.

    Much less getting near Clive!

    I wonder if they made sure security kept her away. No one needs to have that crack drama near their positive careers.

    Sadly, I have no positive words for that Marilyn essay. Everyone else has already stated how delusional Lohan is… and that really does sum it up.

    I am more interested in what the Judge is going to say in the upcoming court meeting. Since Lohan is not making the effort to get that community service done.

  39. juju says:

    Oh stop she will never be compared to Marilyh Monroe. Every freakin interview she compares herself to Marilyn. there was one Marilyn and there will never be another period !!!!!!!!!!!!!! Lindsay Lohan looks like she’s 35 years old and she’s only in her 20 something !! Wasted and wore out !!

  40. Annie says:

    So in summery:


  41. itstrue says:

    I wonder if all the Marilyn-wannabes have considered that no-one can be the next Marilyn unless they (now excuse me here) DIE. And why the comparisons to those who died in their prime, has she just accepted that an overdose will probably do her in and she can then take her place among the legends? Is she possibly (again excuse me) even hoping for it, “oh, they’re all gonna be sorry when I overdose.” Just wondering.

  42. Piko says:

    Her sense of entitlement makes me sick to my stomach. She needs to be stopped.

  43. gee says:

    The thing is with Marilyn, she might have had drug and self esteem problems but she was so much more. She oozed sex, she lit up the screen with her presence, she seemed sweet and caring, she was SMART (have you ever read her letters?), she tried. She had so many good qualities to balance out the bad.

    Linnocent has none of those. She read a well written script and had a pretty face.

  44. Ruby Red Lips says:

    Linnocent delusionally (whats new?!) believes that she is MM incarnate…

    Linnocent is so full of lies and delusion, its not funny anymore – she is a drug taking working escort who is famous for acting out (not in a gd way) Period.

    At least MM was an actress, Linnocent’s acting days are way over, sadly Linnocent and her p1mp, I mean mother can’t and will never see this through the cr*ck haze

  45. Cirque28 says:

    So all the tabloids, just like Marilyn, keep harping on my mistakes.

    Why did no one edit this child’s rambling? Marilyn is harping on LL’s mistakes?

    I wonder if she realizes she’s not an orphan.

  46. Tierra says:

    Why on earth would or did they ask LL to write an essay about MM? What does one have to do with the other?
    Im confused as to why she was a part of this. Its a shame b/c she is probably going to turn off any interest just b/c she was involved with it. MM still has some die-hard fans out there, I doubt they care what this waste of air writes.
    I think she tainted the entire thing by just having her name associated with it.

  47. boo says:

    Lindsay get your head out of your ass stat! You are not MM, will never be MM. You are old and used up and the only way you get to have the lifestyle you think you deserve is to whore yourself out to the highest bidder. That is all, that is all you are, now go make that money ho.

  48. Rita says:


    “CLIVE OWEN?!? Linnocent was at the same party as Clive Owen? Bitch.”

    Don’t worry. My sources tell me she passed out under his desk but woke up when a pantiless Oprah sat down to pen a letter “from the desk of Clive Owen”.

  49. izzyvalentine says:

    I think they ARE just alike- both got work through having sex with men with power. I don’t have any respect for Marilyn as an actress- none at all- but I do respect her hustle. And I would have more respect for Lin’s hustle too, but god… she’s such a mess. At least Marilyn looked fabulous.

  50. Just Sayin says:

    This walking freckle with Va-Jay-Jay lips needs to slow her role. Just Sayin….

  51. hillbilly in the corner says:

    Marilyn was a whore who slept her way thru every director and producers office in Hollywood to get her money , and fame..

    Lindsay is a whore who sleeps her way thru rich men for money.

    Marilyn was a druggie and a alcoholic
    Lindsay is a druggie and a alcoholic

    Marilyn tried to improve her acting lessons and schooling at least she tried to change……

    Lindsay hasn’t done anything to change and doesn’t want to change her life style cause she completely delusuional…and vain..

    Well three out of four for them being alike

    except for one important thing……

  52. Sara says:

    Lindsay, it’s never to late to go to college, you’re only 24 and now that you have no movie roles, now would be a perfect time to get a degree to fall back on if you don’t want to be a celebrity.

  53. Blood Red Witch says:

    I vote that TMZ and ROL chip in to buy her a wig! They are hand in hand with the Lowhands anyway. They should help out.

  54. Denise says:

    There is a photo of Marilyn exercising in my gym; I was looking at it this morning- that Crackie even mentions her name makes me sick to my stomach. Marilyn had real issues, not manufactured ones. And you know what? she was always a professional; she showed up to work prepared and disciplined. I wish Crackie would STFU

  55. Kyla says:

    I really hate to say this (but not really). I wish she would be more like Marilyn and just OD already. She can say that she doesn’t want to be a celebrity, but she isn’t trying to do anything else. And I agree with the comment that it’s doubful that she actually wrote that herself. Even though it is very “me me me” someone else probably revised it for her.

  56. G says:

    Monroe generously entertained the USO. Lohan declined saying she was busy.

  57. Cirque28 says:

    I guess we know what LL’s dreadful hair color is about now.

  58. Madisyn says:

    Mornin Crack Cliquers

    NO ONE sent Blohan 40 magnums of premium champagne. This came from her ‘rep’ Dina. Like Blohan is loved, popular. Talk about a BITCH, PLEASE!

    Don’t worry about Clive Owen, he was probably clear on the other side of the room and wouldn’t know Blohan from Adam.

    Here, here Ruby Red. Anyone seen my twin bellaluna? I’m floating on my palm tree raft in the vodka vat and I can’t find her. She’s not in the treehouse either. I need a cracktini! Anyone else like to join me?

  59. Kelly says:

    @G, well, what would Lindsay actually DO to entertain the troops? Apparently she has only one (ok, two) talents, and both involve suction – via the nose and throat areas.

  60. ViloDeMenus says:

    hahahahaha! she’s as delusional as her father!

    First mistake, no one would compare Blohan to Marilyn, except crackie Blohan. EVER.

    The “celebrity” she’s talking about is because she’s a failed to transition child actor, who isn’t even a SAG member anymore. Amanda Seyfreid, you see about 1 pic a month, because she’s busy acting, same with ScarJo, and Rachel McAdams, Kristin Stwart,and other actresses in her age group who have careers, they aren’t speed dialing the paps for some bizarre validation. Everyone with eyes sees this.

    Trust, those little jacked up brown teeth aren’t going to be on magazine covers for very much longer, the joke has pretty much written itself and the punchline is now sad and no longer funny. She really needs to stop self revering herself as Marilyn because she’s nothing like her, and never will be. Blohan failed and because of her narcissism, her life of theft, drugs, and a borderline violent personality has left a trail of bad feelings and no respect so she’s virtually unemployable at 25. This is probably the last year we’ll have to endure at any of the Fashion Weeks, and covers of magazines we’ve never heard of — It’s almost over thankfully!

  61. Matt says:


    LMAO @ Annie!!!!!

  62. andyconda says:

    she took ballet until she was 19…why didnt she get “the Black swan” role…it was only see her fall down all over the streets and in piss covered alleys,showed such grace and elegance..
    Marilyn banged Joe degagio,both kennedy brothers. and big money producers…
    Lindsay had gross viral sex with…Greasy bear,Sam Ronchy,tommy matola,the glory hole strangers, and people in the mens room at the marmont,Plus her mom,PP,patrick,and Vikram

  63. Bess says:

    I can’t believe that Linnocent is still in negotiation for this Gotti flick. They probably can’t get insurance for her.

    How many chances will this crackhead get?

  64. Rio says:

    of course she didn’t “appear” to be drinking. Bitch sucks back liquor so fast you’d need machines capable of recording the speed of light to measure it.

  65. Madisyn says:


    “I vote that TMZ and ROL chip in to buy her a wig! They are hand in hand with the Lowhands anyway. They should help out”.

    You got that right. The last story on Blohan at ROL: “Leggy Lindsay Lohan Smokin’ Hot In Paris”.

    Whose smokin crack now? Bitch is what, 5’4? That’s not ‘leggy’. ‘Smokin Hot’, on what planet?

    I’d love to know WHY ROL says this absolutely idiotic bullshit. For the life of me, I can’t figure it out. As for TMZ, they seem to have all but given up on the Cracken.

    Article goes on to say she went into Chanel. Ten bucks says they watched her like a hawk.

  66. andyconda says:

    damn lindsay I drove really fast in a car, so i know how dale earnheart felt when he wrecked…I tried LSD so I guess I should emulate jim morrison…I swim daily so michael phelps is just like me…
    I ride a bike as a kid so I know how it is to win the tour de france…

    thats one crazy bitch…
    someone needs to dork slap her into reality…
    Fing poser…just like those stupid surfing pics and everything else she does…way behind in life just like her schooling…

  67. Kat says:

    I have two words for La Crackiata: Bitch, please!

  68. andyconda says:

    If you trace the lohan family tree back far can find out where STDs began.

  69. Cheyenne says:

    Jesus-jumped-up-Christ-on-a-pony, please don’t tell me this waste of protoplasm is trying to compare herself to Marilyn Monroe.

  70. Danziger says:


    Oh my god my brain just combusted.

  71. MarenGermany says:

    I think her biggest problem is that she is plain lazy.

    She wants the awards, the applause, the glamour without being willing to WORK for it.
    Marylin did.

  72. Ron says:

    BULLSHIT. If that’s the case then don’t go to the opening of every envelope in LA you stupid bitch. LIAR LIAR PANTS ON FIRE AND THAT’S NOT BECUASE YOU FORGOT YOUR VALTREX EITHER.

  73. Deven says:

    This old-looking girl is hallucinating again. She’s the only person on earth who thinks she’s being thought about or cared about as much as she does herself. She’s just table scraps for the paps.

  74. Kelly says:

    @MarenGermany, she works REALLY HARD! It takes a lot of energy to change your clothes, fall down, and shoplift. And maintain your weave, get “F U” painted on your nails, and drive like a lunatic. Why do you think she drinks so much Red Bull and takes Adderall and cocaine? It’s the rest of the population that’s lazy. “Move that job… I’m Lindsay Lohan!”

  75. Jaana says:

    I didnt even read this story. stop reporting on this witch PLEASE!!!

  76. Ruby Red Lips says:

    @ Madisyn, evening! I’ll join u in the vodka vat for a cracktini and crackmopolitan ;)

    Your take on the magnums is spot on – I did wonder who would do that for Linnocent!! Not even one of her v rich clients so def another delusion from mamma delusion Dina herself!!

  77. Nicky says:

    So apparently one of the rejects from the British X Factor, Nicolo Festa was at the same party as Lohan four days ago and tweeted:

    “Who said Lindsay Lohan was clean? I stole her glass of “champagne” and it was vodka straight up I almost puked”

    Followed by:

    “I’ve never been so starstruck in my life. A bit disappointed though she looked like one of those that sells the big issue”

    The Big Issue is a weekly magazine sold by the homeless. LMAO.

  78. Stacia says:

    She’s washed up and has no career left to speak of.

  79. Jilliterate says:

    Meh. Marilyn Monroe has become so overrated and hyped up that she appears on dorm room walls and is name dropped by people who don’t know a thing about classic cinema. I enjoy some of her movies, but she was a notoriously unprofessional trainwreck, and there are more than a few parallels between her and Lindsay (Although probably not in the way Lindsay thinks). Just wait…Lindsay will likely OD, and just a few generations down the road, ignorant young women will be acting like she was the tragically-misunderstood Second Coming, while ignoring the greater achievements that were made by her peers.

  80. logan says:

    I was going to write something about her has been looks, has been career, has been life style, her trouble with the law, her drug and alchol use, etc, but you know what, it is getting old really, really old. She no longer does anything worth while. Her life style is down the crapper. Her career is circling the drain. She is done. I have made fun of her. Pretended to be shocked at her antics. Her story is old and I am done with it. How about that Betty White isn’t she great. Now she will never be old. Love her!!!!

  81. Ruby Red Lips says:

    “Who said Lindsay Lohan was clean? I stole her glass of “champagne” and it was vodka straight up I almost puked”

    I just wish more people would report things like this…not to mention Linnocent declares she is sober! so why drink ‘champagne’?!

    Tho if Linnocent is drinking neat vodka in these amounts then maybe the cr*ck isn’t going to be her death tool

  82. Madisyn says:

    Ruby Red

    Blohan doesn’t ‘drink’ remember? LMAO Champagne is not her drink of choice anyway. Now had the article said ‘someone’ sent a case of Kettle One, that I would have considered. Not believed, mind you, but it would have been semi-plausible.

    Not to mention, what would 40 magnums of Dom cost? I have no idea, my idea of champagne was Cold Duck 25 years ago. Not only the cost but not even Blohan and her ‘entourage’ (Pootie) could drink that much.

    I could poke holes in this story all day long. Delusions of grandeur, thy name is White Oprah! *clinking cracktini glass to your crackmopolitan*


    “Who said Lindsay Lohan was clean? I stole her glass of “champagne” and it was vodka straight up I almost puked”

    HA! Loves it.


    Her ‘career’ circled the drain 4 years ago. Her ‘acting career’ is dead! Did you just mention Blohan and the esteemed Betty White in the same sentence? Blastphemy!

  83. Ashley says:

    I’m just sick of hearing Marilyn Monroe’s name, period. I watch a fair amount of old cinema, and Marilyn is one of the few actresses of that era that I don’t enjoy much. Some of her movies are good, yes, but I can only tolerate the breathy baby voice, wide eyes, and vapid demeanor for so long (it’s mostly the voice, though).

  84. the original bellaluna says:

    Marilyn just wanted to be genuinely loved by someone. I’m sure she self-medicated and yes, she made some poor choices, but she also tried to be a decent human being.

    Linnocent may have been pushed into fame by WO & Co, but once there (and since squandering her career), she’s done whatever (and I MEAN. WHATEVER) to stay “famous.” And I don’t think anyone would accuse Blohan of trying to be a decent human being. She acts like the drugged-out/drunken spoilt toddler whose never been told “NO” and thinks she’s the centre of the universe.

    I hope she reads that! I just snapped when I read that headline.

    Could someone pass me a crackoholic beverage whilst I finish reading the article & comments?

  85. LeeLoo says:

    I am so tired of listening to The Cracken’s deluded lies. That’s all I got, except LOOK AT THE TRACK MARKS ON HER ARM IN THE LAST PHOTO!!! OMFG!!!!!

  86. Ruby Red Lips says:

    @ Bellaluna, *passing a crackmopolitan* Enjoy!

    Night ladies!! Cu at the next Linnocent post of delusion!!

  87. the original bellaluna says:

    Okay, I just read through everything.

    Madisyn, your twin has arrived! *with flourish* I wonder how much it costs “someone” (read: Blohan) to send herself a magnum of ANYTHING at the club. Unless it’s the condoms – they run about $13.99 for the largest box available at the drug store.

    Thanks Ruby Red, and goodnight! (And if that’s what “sober” looks like, thank God I drink!) ;)

  88. Madisyn says:


    THERE you are! I can’t believe it, its actually drizzling here in the Valley, so if you don’t mind, its cracktini’s in the Treehouse tonight and tomorrow. I secured the ‘pool’ by covering it up, no sense watering down good vodka.

    First, she’d never send herself champagne. Second, she couldn’t afford it even if she did want it. Her John, the club owner probably comped the drinks for her and her ‘hairstylist’ Pootie.

    No new pics from Sunday or Monday, right? Could the twit be coming back? Please let her go back to NY (sorry NY) and not back to LA. You know if SamRo had any sense, when Blohan was blowing everyone and everything in Europe, that would have been the time to move. And fast. I have to wonder if she signed a lease and thats why she hasn’t moved. But I’ll bet its been a great 3 weeks in Venice for her and all residents.

  89. Aries_Mira says:

    All I read was “Marilyn never wanted to be a celebrity. Neither do I.” and the coffee was nearly out my nose. What a bald-faced lie! Coming from the mouth of the woman who screeches severe indignation when someone does not recognize just who she is. Lindsay, do yourself a favour and get over yourself, get far away from Hollywood, be by yourself for a while and find out who you actually are.

  90. the original bellaluna says:

    Mad – Yes, drinks in the Treehouse, definitely. It’s been raining since 8 yesterday morning, so I’m cool with that. Thank you. I do so HATE watered down vodka. (I guess it’s my inner Lohan!)

    No, but I wouldn’t put it past her to have her minions pouring Costco vodka into Kettle One (or Stoli – whatever) bottles and “sending” them to her at a club.

    Oh please, ohpleaseohplease DON’T let Blohan be returning to Cali. Let her go to her hometown and wreak havoc on them for a change. (Sorry, LI)

    And you can “buy out” your lease option, if you have enough $$$…which I’m sure SRo does. (Property Management, 11 years.)

  91. Madisyn says:


    I hope Bess is OK. Its not like her to only post one time in the morning.

    As for SamRo, maybe she owns the property and doesn’t rent. If thats the case I suppose her only hope would be when Vikram gets tired of paying the rent on Blohans rented place or the Betty Ford payoff finally runs out. We’ve all speculated in the past about how she pays the rent and it seems the consensus was a BF payout for a year. Granted, were only guessing but makes sense. That would expire in January then right? We know Blohan can’t afford $7000 a month.

    Now I’ll join you in the Treehouse for another cracktini.

  92. Original Tiffany says:

    I am actually gobsmacked on this one. I’ll just face palm and do a swan dive into the pool. A very large cractini with a shot of delusion please.

  93. Boo says:

    DailyMail still has her in Paris today, 10/4, wearing hotpants into Chanel. They allege Chanel opened the store for her privately after hours…does she really rate high enough for that? Or did they just want to be sure all the security cameras could track her every move without interference from real customers?

  94. Madisyn says:


    Are you sure the picture is of today? Yesterday ROL had a post up of Blohan in short shorts in front of Chanel. Oh well, at least as of yesterday she was in Paris. Lets see what tomorrow brings.

  95. Boo says:

    You’re right, Madisyn–it was last night. While I was Nancy Drew-ing at ROL, I saw her first appearance in NYC was 9/9–so she has been out of LA and away from her court-ordered therapy for very close to a month. No, really, HOW can this be okay? I have to believe this is NOT going to be okay with ol’ Steffy McBlackRobe.

  96. Bess says:

    I’m still here.

    I think the Chanel shots are from yesterday, as they are also on the Celebrity Gossip site. Also, Blohan is still in Paris. That Love Cat magazine is hosting another party for her in Paris, per some of her entourage’s twitter.


    Why do you think the Gotti producers are still acting like she’s got a chance to be in that film?

  97. dr.bombay says:

    Does she think we’re on crack, too??

  98. Boo says:

    Bess, re Gotti: –>

    However, I saw elsewhere that Fiore has a bunch of bills to pay, and if they can’t/don’t, that ship is sunk —>

  99. Auds says:

    She is irrelevant, prematurely aged.

  100. Madisyn says:


    It can’t be right, right? I mean why bother ordering ‘therapy’ once a month? Its a waste of time and money. I just can’t imagine the judge allowing her to skip ‘therapy’ for a month, as its THIS judge that was adamant and pushing for therapy in the first place. It only heightens the chances that something may go down on the 19th. I know its not probable, but it is possible. On the 19th, I’m going to be the opposite of what I usually am and go with ‘glass half FULL’. Of course, playing devils advocate, if she was in violation, wouldn’t the judge have ordered an arrest warrant already? Yes I know they wouldn’t extradite her or anything but she could violate her. Shit, now I’m upset again. Back to ‘glass half EMPTY’.


    I went back to read the article. The producers didn’t say anything, only Honig, they’re public mouthpiece. He’s just generating publicity for the MOVIE. Unfortunately Blohan is reason the movie’s getting any publicity in the first place. I really believe thats all it is. Her name being removed from IMDb says it all for me. She doesn’t have a SAG card, is uninsurable and Kim Gotti is an Italian American. Blohan looks about as Italian as Heather Locklear or Pam Anderson. No worries, NOT GONNA HAPPEN!

  101. andyconda says:

    you have been saying she has been gone almost a month,,and have not gone to therapy..or CS….but she is also liable while on formal probation to report once a month to her PO….she has also have to be able to be contacted.Something is fishy here…——
    A while back I heard gossip that the Staff of the DWC. were not happy with her conduct.she showed up late smelled of booze and had an attitude…maybe thats why she is partying it up before court…
    just like cannes she knew she was in trouble

  102. Miranda says:

    @SillyOne #41: Was going to say the same thing! She has a receding hairline! Gross!!!!

    You can only say “pull my hair and call me bitch” so many times…eventually your hair starts falling out.

  103. andyconda says:

    with a face like larry king…breast like carrol channing,voice like marg simpsons sisters on “the simpsons” and legs that have taken a beatin….How could this be a model/ actress?
    I have seen better mugs on a carp

  104. Joe's Mom says:

    She was obviously stoned when she wrote this one.

  105. Veronica says:

    I see scratches on her left arm, who knows if they are track marks or what, didn’t she used to be a self harmer? Or still is? And that dirty “bandaid” mark on her upper arm actually looks like a faded or partially removed tattoo if you zoom in. It has a faint image in it. Not defending her at all but I’m inclined to think her money goes up her nose not in her arm.

  106. daisy says:

    “Marilyn never wanted to be a celebrity. Neither do I.” i dont want you to be one either lindsay. fyi you are not the only lindsay in the world so stop acting like you can sue everytime someone says the name. i really miss the little redheaded girl.

  107. the original bellaluna says:

    Mad – True. Maybe SamRo owns (but I doubt it – these H-Weird types are very unpredictable so who knows?) and if so, poor her. And we all know Blohan cannot afford her “sea jasper” let alone a $7K/month crash pad. Thank goodness for sugar daddies, right? ;)

    Bess – Did you have to go to Hell (the DMV) too? I don’t know why the producers (or whatever) of Gotti would even indulge Linnocent in her delusions, unless they have a stake in the (false) promotion of the project. It’s probably never going to get off the ground.

    And as if my week hadn’t started off bad enough (Hell, aka DMV, AND the computers were down!), I’m now battling ants! With Febreeze, no less! (Raid kills me, not them.) Ugh. At least my house smells nice.

    Cracktini, crackmopolitan, crackmosa, crackANYTHING please!

  108. ShanKat says:

    I find her more Dana Plato than Marilyn Monroe.

  109. Celebitchy says:

    @bellaluna: for ants you can get the little white traps to put out. They don’t smell at all and the ants are gone in about a day. It’s better than the sprays because it gets the nest.

  110. Boo says:

    Well, let’s see. Judge orders therapy at the original sentencing for the No Contest Theft plea in late April. Progress hearing in July. At that progress hearing, Lindsay STILL had not signed up for therapy, with the excuse that she couldn’t afford it. Judgey gives her 3 more weeks to SIGN UP for it, which she does, so now we are talking early August. She leaves LA early September for what appears to be a solid month, so in the 6 months since she was ordered to therapy, she has had only about ONE month where she was actually doing therapy. If I were the judge, I would be freaking pissed off.

  111. MacScore says:

    Yesterday was my birthday so I missed this one; out drinking real champagne with real people, not straight vodka surrounded by sycophantic ass-kissers. Bluddy ‘ell this made my day. I once thought I had an ounce of sympathy left for her, when I inadvertently bumped on to a site with pics of her as a “sweet” little red-headed child actress. But now: can’t she just be locked up, please? And, no, she can’t write. Even a ghost writer couldn’t save that mangled, egotistical rant.
    @ Bellaluna, Madisyn, Bess, Boo – thanks for the larrrrge larrrrfs and the info! Much appreciated.
    I await with anticipation the next Blohan sighting – where is she? I hope she’s left our continent and is flying straight into the waiting arms of Homeland Security.

  112. @ Andy, I dont know where you got that she took ballet till she was 19 (sounds like a load of BS Dina would say) Lindsay moved to LA when she was 16 yrs old.She partyed non-stop till today. How in the world do you see her taking Ballet clases when she was out till 5-6-7am every day? I cant believe you would fall for that one. Linday was NEVER home schooled, just more lies from Dina ( how can Dina home school her when LL was in LA and Dina was on Long Island, plus LL was out every night) Lindsay never made it passed the 8th grade. Nor has Ali or Cody. Mike jr. is the only one with a education

    Andy please dont ever say she took ballet till she was 19, it makes you sound like Dina

  113. Bess says:


    Thanks for the Gotti info. I didn’t know the movie was in financial trouble.

    I didn’t have to suffer through a trip to the DMV. I was getting my car repaired and ended up waiting at the dealer’s for 5 hours.

    I can’t imagine that the judge is going to be happy with Blohan’s antics in Milan, Paris and NYC over the past 3+ weeks. Instead of violating her, maybe the judge will put more restrictions on her, such as no travel out of US, seeing the therapist 1 per week, etc.

  114. Boo says:

    Crackie sighting. Still in Paris on Tuesday, Oct. 4:

    The dress is really pretty…except that she makes it look dirty and cheap the minute her skin comes into contact with it. The dudes with her also look like very upstanding individuals.

  115. Bess says:

    I was just going to post those pictures too!

    The two upstanding gentlemen with her are Patrick/Pootie on the left and Gavin Doyle on the right.

    Patrick is her usual sidekick/enabler/travel companion and Gavin is supposed to be some sort of photographer/blogger. Gavin was with her when she purchased the sea jasper on the street from her friend.

  116. Boo says:

    At what point does a grown man stop going by “Pootie”? In the immortal words of Gob Bluth, “Come on!”

  117. andyconda says:

    Imabratforever:i know she did not take ballet…But when Natali Portman,got an oscar for the movie “Black Swan”..Lindsay did an interview with Plum or Italian Vanity fair…And said she took ballet up until the time she was 19..And she should have been cast for the role…
    maybe its on twitter..Ill go find it

  118. andyconda says:

    here it is…”Plum Mag….-
    “As we pulled up to the Fontainebleau, a bright-orange parking cone was blocking the entrance. Not accustomed to waiting, apparently, she lowered the car’s window and shouted, ‘Move that cone. I’m Lindsay Lohan,’” Powers recalls. “And it was done.”

    PHOTOS: How Lindsay’s face has changed

    Noting that Lohan drank wine while discussing her sobriety, Powers says the Mean Girls star was “constantly looking for drama, whether it was picking a fight with her younger sister…or freaking out over a lost pair of Zanotti heels.”

    VIDEO: How Lindsay’s life took a dark turn

    Frustrated with the state of her career, Lohan said she “took ballet until she was 19 and was indignant that she was not considered for the movie Black Swan,” Powers adds.

    Though Lohan abruptly canceled the interview, that didn’t stop her from making the most out of her time in Miami. “Monday morning was supposed to be check-out time, but Lindsay and her posse refused to leave,” Powers writes. “It was like watching the lights come on at a nightclub after-hours — not pretty.”

    PHOTOS: Hollywood’s biggest bad girls

  119. Original Tiffany says:

    We got the Plum quotes again. Man, I love those. I’ve been swimming in the crackmosa pool since my last post. It’s wonderful.
    Booze and hotpants! The big nipple’s (Nancy Grace) great Cracken quote. Screeeee. Into the vat I go.
    What’s with the weather at home in Ca? You’d better fix that shit before I get home Madisyn! I want some hot beach weather with Santa Ana’s by the 15th! Or I will need an endless supply of cracktinis!

  120. Madisyn says:

    Mornin All, cracktinis all around.


    One good thing about this judge is she, her clerk or someone in her household read the gossip rags. The judge made it clear she would accept NO EXCUSES for not completing CS. My point is when her CS report is reavealed and HOPEFULLY she’s failed to do her ‘therapy’ to the terms laid down by the judge, maybe there will be consequences.

    Bess I like your idea about more restrictions, I think we’re going to find out the terms of her ‘therapy’ come two weeks from today but may I vote for a SCRAM and random drugs tests to boot. That would put the kabosh on travel outside California. That’s the only thing that brings her incessant over indulgent partying to a halt.

    You put a SCRAM and do random drug testing on this slag until her CS is complete, I guarantee she’ll complete it.

  121. Madisyn says:


    I agree. ‘Pootie’, what the f$%&! Its not cute, its ridiculous.


    Yes Maam! Yesterday it drizzled for 10 SECONDS. Today is the worst of the rain for us here in the Valley and it might even clean my car off. Possible drizzle tomorrow but then the temp goes right back up. Sunday its suppose to be 90. Shall we have a barbeque/’pool’ party?

    Don’t you just LOVE how this Powers woman massively called her out. Only problem is no one except a handful of people in Miami and gossip readers actually saw the piece. Too bad in wasn’t in the NY Times or the LA Daily News.

  122. andyconda says:

    the new Hot bod contest contestants will be.
    duchess alba.
    phylis Dyler
    carrol channing
    Jocelyn Wildenstien
    and lindsay lohan

    after party will have body shots. nip slips.. drinking contest..

  123. AAAAAAAAAAAAA I almost puked all over my keyboard.. Just saw pics at Just Jared and my god Lindsay teeth are grossssssssssss! They are looking worse than last week

  124. Use the Zoom key on the bottom of the pics, sorry I didnt post that

  125. Madisyn says:


    “Patrick is her usual sidekick/enabler/travel companion”

    You forgot ‘accomplice’ in the theft of the necklace and perpetual ‘freeloader’. What a decent gig for this guy. Free travel, room & board, endless parties, and all the drugs and booze he can ingest. The only downside I see is having to deal with Blohan.


    “I saw her first appearance in NYC was 9/9″

    That was a Friday. We first saw the pics Sunday 9/11. It makes sense. Flys out Friday, gets papp’d. Parties Saturday night and pics go online on Sunday when we all saw them. That means tomorrow will be ONE FULL MONTH she’s away from her ‘therapy’. She probably flew out first thing Friday morning, so the last time she possibly could have attended ‘therapy’ was Thursday 9/8. I still can’t see THIS JUDGE allowing her to ‘party’ in NYC and Europe to blow off her CS and therapy. Wouldn’t she need permission to leave CA while on ‘formal’ probation? Color me confused? And the DA’s office wonders why people are screaming “special treatment”?

  126. Danielle says:

    Hysterical that chanel locked up store with her in it,im assuming they figured”well if she shoplifts something that would be easy for her,but she wouldnt know how to unlock the door,that would be to hard for her”.

  127. Blood Red Witch says:


    I clicked on that………….you are sooooooooooooo bad! LOL

  128. Danielle says:

    Dear Lindsay,you are nothin but a ratty blonde glued up extension wearing,fake eyelash having,angelina jolie lips wishing,brown chipped teeth having,going bald with red roots trying to come out being,crusty nail having,coke in nose and dress showing,vodka and redbull guzzling,i dont want to be a celebrity Lying,rolex,furcoat and jewlery stealing,tabloid fodder trash being,fame whore exploiting,call girl doing,actress wishing,come do me high heel wearing,law breaking,self entitled,self absorbed,fashonista wishing but not having,im mm reincarnated wishing…

    wow that was easy,she makes it so easy!

  129. Danielle says:

    oh i forgot,no bra owning,bruise and cut marks having,pre-mature wrinkles showing,straight up and rode up trash,its curtains for you…fade to black!