Linnocent’s probation revoked, sentencing hearing set for Nov. 2

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REVOKED! One of the sweetest words in the Language of Linnocent. After a blistering 40-minute-long hearing, Linnocent probation has been revoked. You know what? As much bitching and moaning as I’ve done, I have to give Judge Stephanie Sautner a lot of credit. She put up a good fight, and even though her hands were tied with the sorry state of the California legal, probation, parole and jail systems, Judge Sautner let it be known that she was nobody’s fool. Judge Sautner has had enough, and it struck me during her soliloquy about the California jails that Sautner really is trying to ensure that Linnocent gets the toughest kind of punishment possible. If you think about it, if the judge had given her a jail sentence out of hand months ago, LL would already be done. But the judge is trying to draw it out, and really make Lindsay squirm. It’s kind of smart.

Some highlights from the BALLS OUT AWESOME hearing were:

*The judge saying that Linnocent getting kicked out of the Women’s Center was enough to revoke her probation.

*The judge’s mystification at how the probation department still gave LL a glowing report. The judge’s side-eye said it all – “Mother Crackhead was handing out cash and beejs.”

*NO TIME SERVED for the Red Cross community service.

*Linnocent only completed her shoplifting class last night. The judge was not impressed.

*The whole sketchiness with Linnocent and her psychiatrist was really weird. How difficult is it to lock down how many sessions LL has had? And why all of the consternation over the time frame LL was out of LA? Shawn was all “I’ll have to check!” Her client is sitting right there, ask the crackie.

*The whole thing about LL only finding work in Europe made me sad. I know Shawn was trying to play on our heartstrings because Linnocent truly is supporting her whole family and that SUCKS, but it’s also sad because Linnocent’s “work in Europe” mostly consisted of her partying with her johns in various clubs. Her “work” is prostitution.

*I also loved when the judge ripped LL a new one for her complaint that the Women’s Center work “was not fulfilling.” Ridic.

*She was handcuffed! I never get tired of that.

So, the next hearing is set for November 2. The bail for the two charges was set at $50,000 each, and of course, Linnocent’s bail bondsman was in court. LL must complete 16 hours (2 8-hour days) of work at the morgue in between now and November 2. So, what will go down at the November hearing? It could be a jail sentence, or it could be something else. I don’t know.

Oh, quick word about LL’s outfit – it’s Fendi! The purse is Chanel. Wearing white is so dumb, and a style no-no after Labor Day. She’s breezing into court like she’s going to a summer picnic. And my opinion is always that you should cover your arms for court. AND HER MAKEUP. Jesus, does she not know how to apply blush?

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Photos courtesy of Fame, screencaps from TMZ.

 

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206 Responses to “Linnocent’s probation revoked, sentencing hearing set for Nov. 2”

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  1. Smokey says:

    She’ll be out buying more “sea jasper” within two hours.

  2. kieslwoski says:

    Kaiser thanks for the recap!!!!!! You made me laugh out loud as usual with your Cracken posts!

  3. Amanda says:

    YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!

    And fix your makeup, jeesus.

  4. LisaMarie says:

    Handcuffed! Hahahahaha! Yeah, she’ll get out, but at least she’s gotta go through booking. And WTF with the makeup? Someone should tell her that no amount of bronzer in the world will deflect from her crack-puff face

  5. Lauren says:

    Looks like she should be in morgue instead of doing community service there. Yikes she looks bad!

  6. Becky says:

    sweet recap. and yes, that blush makes her look just plain dirty.

  7. lizzie says:

    ok….what EXACTLY is she in trouble for? like…what was the charge that brought all this about? im confused….

  8. neelyo says:

    That make-up!

    I read on another site that the judge said, ‘I hear she’s supposed to be some sort of actress’.

    And why the big scarves? If I hear that this look starts selling out I will give up all hope in the future of America.

  9. Diane says:

    Awesome recap, it’s a keeper.

  10. jules says:

    does anyone else notice how GLAZED her eyes are? definitly on something.

  11. Jackson says:

    And not to mention that those shoes look atrocious with that outfit. Was she purposely trying to look terrible? Mission accomplished!

  12. Harley says:

    I won’t believe she’ll get jail time until it actually happens. Until then, I’ll just hope.

  13. i.want.shoes says:

    Either she mistook her black eyeshadow for her blush, or the b!tch is rotting from the inside.

  14. Shelly says:

    I love that they actually showed her in handcuffs this time! And pretty dress, but not appropriate for court. I agree – she looks like she’s going to a summer picnic. Does she not own a conservative suit? If she’s confused – she needs to look at attorneys’ attire and go buy something like that.

  15. MeMyself says:

    For God’s sake woman, just do what you are supposed to do and be done with it!
    Someone else on an earlier thread said that her entrance into courtrooms is now her red carpet and I couldn’t agree more!

    Is this the only way she can get attention?

    If she want to pursue her (now gone) carer, why doesn’t she clear her diary (not that it’s that full of work anyway) and just cram as many hours in as short a time frame as possible!! It’s like in college and you know that big paper is X amount of your grade. Just do it and be done with it. Simples.

    And to add in some snark, my 7 year old daughter applies her makeup at dressing up time better than that. Hell, my 4 year old daughter does. Doesn’t she have a mirror in her house??

  16. Jacq says:

    I just know Coco’s rolling in her grave whenever I see those double C’s on Lindsay.

  17. fabchick says:

    Finally somebody is holding her accountable. That makeup is horrible, it looks like she just smashed dirt on her cheeks.

  18. Obvious says:

    I want pictures of her face when her probation was revoked. can someone find that for me? i was actually doing work at work instead of paying attention at that glorious moment.

  19. S says:

    that third pic is AMAZING! Shawn’s face says “shoot me now” and Linnocent is trying to convey shock that someone isn’t buying her crap, but she messed up her face too badly, and it kinda just looks like she’s being sucked into a drain

  20. whome says:

    her dress is uggs and her make up looks like shit!! I felt the judge was tuff too and not buying any of her bull shit!

  21. gee says:

    Her lawyer should use the comments from your discussion post to show how Linnocent is doing good: Look at the sense of community she’s fostered! Tons of women (and some men) from across the globe bonding over crack shenanigans.

  22. Incredulous says:

    A shoplifting class??

    “Now class, what do we do when we want something that we like in the shop instead of stealing it? …Anyone?

    …YES, Lindsay?”

    “Uhmmmmmmmmm….”

    “Yes Lindsay, go on…”

    “Uh, I, uhm, I get one of my entourage to steal it?”

    “*Sighs* No, Lindsay, just no.”

  23. Bronson says:

    i also loved the judges comment “She’s supposed to be an actress, from what I hear.” PRICELESS.

  24. ladybert62 says:

    When I first saw the blush, I thought – what is wrong with that camera – wait, what is wrong with the lights in the courtroom – wait, what is wrong with my eyes – wait, what is wrong with crackie! That blush was smeared on with a paintbrush – my husband could put on blush better than that (sorry hubby, just a joke).

    And I totally agree with your comments about the dressing in white (can we all say OBVIOUS in one loud long breath) and the sleeveless – well that is a major complaint I also have with Mrs. Obama – cover up those damn arms!

    And I also think crackie was on something – her eyes were HUGH (as were her fake eyelashes!) and I was trying hard to see what the pupils looked like but could not see – but her eyes were crazy moving in court – they were actually hysterical!

    And her hair – it looked like it was a mane straight off of some unfortunate horses’ neck – straw looking and dirty looking (sorry to any horses reading this!)

    Thoroughly enjoyed every live minute even though I could only watch and not hear it!

  25. Novaraen says:

    Lilo was cracked out of her mind too! I watched her crazy eyes moving all around while her lawyer was talking…they were SCARY. And that blush looks like two poop smears. Awful!

  26. Beatrix says:

    did anyone else catch this entitled piece of work’s strut into the holding room to be booked? holy cow she’s completely deranged and has no way of climbing down her cloud of delusion; nope too far gone, the only way anyone around her will learn from this is if she just calls it quits from using too much

  27. beclove says:

    She’s just a young girl who wants to work!! – attributed to Mother Cracken

  28. jane16 says:

    She wears the most ludicrous ensembles to court, plus the crackie makeup & remember the fu manicure? God, what a mess. I thought she should’ve gotten jail a long time ago. Can you imagine if any non-celeb carjacked someones vehicle and went off on a crazy, drug fueled, tear through the West Side with people in it? I still can’t figure out why that wasn’t kidnapping.

  29. Emma says:

    The bronzer/blush:
    1. Looks like someone was like, “Linds, let me spray something on your face. It will make you look good and feel even better”…proceeded by person whipping out a can of bronze spray paint and endless whiffing of the fumes.

    2. Someone please identify the brand so none of us stand the chance of looking anything like that for a single second.

  30. Devon says:

    It’s actually 32 hours at the morgue. Sautner said she has to do 2 shifts a week for the next 2 weeks.

  31. bluhare says:

    Good. Anyone else would already be in jail. Actually, anyone else would have had this over and done already.

    I bet she goes into rehab to try and avoid jail. That’s the best place for her, although I do think she should do jail time just for putting everyone through so much unnecessary crap.

    I was feeling really bad for her after the photos from last week . . . she really looked like she was in a bad way. Now I’m back and really sorry I missed the cracknanigans this morning.

  32. KO says:

    @neelyo – Yes, that’s exactly what Sautner said!

    I don’t understand why she doesn’t just do the work – this is all such a hassle to go through. If she cleared it all out, more time to do whatever it is she does.

    This is getting depressing to watch. There’s no life behind those glossy eyes.

  33. Skins says:

    It looks like she rubbed poop on her face. WTF? Lets get real here, we can’t have Crackhan going to jail for too long, what will we do for our daily fix?

  34. ladybert62 says:

    Date 11/2/11 marked on my office calendar! Another great crackie party and day in court! This is reality TV worth watching!

    All kids in school should be made to watch this and then discuss it afterwards – would be a learning experience for them and the teacher!

  35. Ruby Red Lips says:

    So p’d I missed the whole crackie live feed – does anyone know if I can find it anywhere?? tMZ has a short clip but I want to see more!!!

    As said b4 thank god the judge is taking the hardline with her, did u notice how when Saunter said she blew of the woman’s centre, Linnocent actually tried to hide a snigger – the girl is so beyond help!

  36. GiGi says:

    Aha! I just figured out she’s wearing Shawn Chapman Holley’s blush! The same exact shade – perfect on darker skin but on LL it looks like she’s been rubbing her face with newspapers… although… maybe she has…

  37. ladybert62 says:

    Of and if there is a god, please please let someone get some really good pictures of her “working” in the morgue – priceless!!

  38. Apple says:

    when will these star struck gov’t worker bees understand. YOU DO NOT MESS WITH A JUDGE’S ORDER. Half of the trouble Linnocent gets into is people covering her ass and it blowing up in her face when seeing the Judge.

    Judge wasn’t buying the report or therapist’s bullshit. I like this Judge a lot.

  39. Quest says:

    The blush….the horror. That face, those lips…nuff said

  40. laura says:

    I sometimes feel sorry for her attorney, all that education and your job is to defend this moron…having to make yourself look like a fool on her behalf. Oh well, bill those hours baby.

  41. MissyA says:

    Cracktails all around!

    This is awesome stuff – I’m throughly enjoying the schadenfruede.

    Unfortunately, I can’t stay for the cracktinis and revelry. . . I’ve got a midterm this afternoon, and I really have to draw the line at Lindsay Lohan contributing to my delinquency.

    I WILL, however, lace my nightly bowl of “salad” with some sea jasper, in honor of Lady MacMeth.

  42. Green_Eyes says:

    Awesome recap! SWEET seeing Crackin in cuffs!!

    Those EYES OMG! She is every kinda way flying on Crack, and she was FLIPPIN high as heck when she put that Bronze blush on.

    Guess the blush was an accessory to the bag n’ shoes..poor COCo Channel must be looking down saddened that a Skank like LILO is strutting her brand in such a trash manner.

    LILO looks like she will be in the morgue soon alright but not working..she looks like he’ll!

  43. Poison Ivy says:

    Seeing her in handcuffs is priceless. This made my day! I think using this pic as a screensaver will get me trough a whole crappy week.

  44. ShanKat says:

    @ gee #23: Totally! Look at all this love she inspires! All this sisterly fellowship!

    I’ve never seen anyone make a Chanel bag look so cheapified.

    “No white after Labor Day” isn’t really a fashion “rule” anymore, and when it was, it usually meant your bag and shoes, not your clothing.

    That said, her entire look is a complete disaster. Hottest mess ever from tip to top.

  45. kat says:

    my two favourite moments: when the judge said under her breath “what a surprise” when holley said that linds’ bail bondsman was in court. and when the judge barked at her to pay attention. linds gave a start and apologized. i need to review that one :-)

  46. Firecracker says:

    Her blush is the same in all the court appearances, I think! imo applied that way to make her look sad.

    That dress, oh judge, I’m little Miss Innocent! It didn’t work!

    Congrats to Leeloo for winning the contest!

    Shawn was really pushing it, I thought. Loved it when the judge would interrupt her.

  47. Green_Eyes says:

    LOL@ Gee! I can picture her lawyer doing that!!!

  48. Green_Eyes says:

    Bet her armpits reeked, she just looks so crusty!

    Anyone notice the Court Officer in the 5th photo? LOL looks like the Goode dude from CHIPS!

  49. j says:

    Geeze she is a mess.. I hope she finally and most deservedly goes to jail.. she fell into her blush this morning..

  50. teehee says:

    Waltzing to court in chanel and who knows what worth thousands while refusing to do service or claiming banruptcy is just….. just….. they shoudlve done this so long ago

  51. Green_Eyes says:

    Marilyn Monroe she’s definately NOT..but that white dress and scarf she sure is trying to play the Poor Tragic Starlet role…Gag me!

  52. ShanKat says:

    It isn’t just blush on her cheeks, it also looks like contouring shadow. Which is usually taupe-ish, almost brown. It’s really tough to get right on pale skin. Whoever did this did *not* get it right.

  53. Becky says:

    “2. Someone please identify the brand so none of us stand the chance of looking anything like that for a single second.”

    @Emma I bet it’s Sevin Nyne.

  54. Onyx XV says:

    “The whole thing about LL only finding work in Europe made me sad. I know Shawn was trying to play on our heartstrings because Linnocent truly is supporting her whole family and that SUCKS, but it’s also sad because Linnocent’s “work in Europe” mostly consisted of her partying with her johns in various clubs. Her “work” is prostitution.”

    OMG, Kaiser – that is EXACTLY what I was thinking when Shawn was talking about that!! And it IS sad, but it is also … what it is. She IS a prostitute. It’s the only way she can earn any money at all these days. She is dumb as a box of rocks.

    On a side note, if anyone finds out what the deal was with the blush, I’d like to know! It looked like a chimpanzee applied it for her – all due respect to chimpanzees, of course.

  55. atlantapug says:

    did my dog drag his skid mark butt across her face?

  56. Memphis says:

    HA! loved the recap.

    I think that’s just crack house floor dirt on her cheeks from the night before… You know how hard crack dirt is to get off in the a.m. ;)

    I think all the white was her nod to Marilyn. Her way of trying to be like her. Bitch is just that crazy.

  57. Stubbylove says:

    @PoisonIvy – my thoughts exactly – that pic w/her in cuffs is priceless – might frame it.

  58. jane16 says:

    Whats with the fluffy white scarf over her white summer “tea party” dress? Hiding a hickey or something? And gold shoes and purse. Simply hideous.

  59. Ron says:

    What a mess. She needs me to be her agent. She needs to go to jail, Get herself on some sort of track and the do Dancing with the Stars to show Hollywood she can commit to something and complete it. Then maybe a cameo in some small film that is worthwhile and she will be back on track. However, I really don;t see any of that happening. As far as the fashion goes, she makes everything look like cheap ass hooker clothes. Also for SoCAL, we do not have the white rule here at all. The thing that gets me though is that for LA, it’s chilly this morning and she is in white and sleeveless? I guess the cold blood rule does apply.

  60. You don't say says:

    She will find a way to skate on this too, so I would not celebrate to soon. She needs to do some real time or this will be an ongoing, unfunny joke for years to come.

  61. Dani says:

    She looks like a caricature of herself with that ridiculous makeup job. Why wouldn’t her lawyer pull her aside and have her tone down the makeup? The way she dressed and everything about her was just so blatantly bad and sadly it shows how far gone she is.

  62. Gal says:

    I like how she couldn’t get out of that courtroom fast enough, but saunters in on arrival.

  63. Mourning the Death of Music says:

    It must be my pc or my failing eye sight, but I thought her dress appeared more grey than white.

    As for anything else regarding that train wreck, the girl needs help. Serious, professional help (after due jail time)far away from her leaching family and any other corrupt influences.

    IF, after an extensive period of therapy and being out of the public eye, this girl still goes back to her old ways – then she’s simply a doomed soul.

    I don’t wish her death, but I do wish she’d just fade away.

  64. DiaBLa says:

    I vote for 6 hours at the morgue….and yes to going to jail. there is no way in hell she is going to be able to do 2 8 hour shifts. They should make her look at the cracked out druggies that come in. Maybe scare some sense into
    her.

  65. Amanda G says:

    OMG her makeup is hilarious! She looks, walks and dresses like a 70-something year old woman. Just throw her ass in jail so we can be done with her.

  66. hillbilly in the corner says:

    She was higher then a kite, crazy glazed over eyes and mumbling at the judge…..that tells you what Shawn Holly was dancing so fast for……She knew she was fighting a lost cause the minute she stepped into the courtroom thats the realize she had the bailbondsman there in the court with her and I just bet she wanted to scream out loud when she got served right their in the courthouse with a lawsuit…Boy was I off on the days worked count but even I didn’t think she was that dam dumb….! tthat is one arregant bit*h…….

  67. Joe's Mom says:

    She looks like she got just high enough to last her thru the hearing and the bailing out process. I notice only one pic has her teeth visible. They still look bad though. I thought she’d have had them fixed yesterday. Maybe not enough time, considering that pesky shoplifting class she had to finish up last night.

  68. Shannon says:

    She tried to channel Casey Anthony with the pulled-back hair.

  69. Rita says:

    I loved that the judge came right out at the start and said, “You violated your probation.” The judge intentionally boxed herself in with those words, putting Lilo’s attorney on notice and it showed. Lilo’s attorney was panicked and knew it was an up hill battle from the get go. At the end, the judge had to eat her words or violate the probabtion….and she stuck Lilo in the morgue. At least she will have some companionship there….with her career.

  70. Sara says:

    Isn’t she tired of this yet? She looks strung out in the eyes and I can’t imagine that she likes being handcuffed. I guess she really hasn’t hit rock bottom yet. Lindsay GET HELP!!! And get a mirror dear.

  71. Mich says:

    WTF? The outfit was *better* than what we have seen on her many (many, many, many) other visits to court but she looks horrific! Not just the early jump on Halloween make-up but her whole bee stung face. I’m inclined to agree that she’s sick and needs help but she has been offered lots (and lots and lots) of help and has f’ed it up every time. And it seems that being an arrogant narcissist and/or sociopath and/or sea jesper addict doesn’t garner nearly as much sympathy as being bi-polar. Jail is the best thing the judge can do for her. Although I will miss her terribly.

  72. gee says:

    @.Ron: if I was her agent, I’d tell her to go back to red hair and take out the extensions, move to NYC and start taking acting classes, doing theater work, and show everyone the talent she (supposedly) has. She needs to earn her way back to people’s hearts and movie screens.

  73. Amanda says:

    Is that really blush? To me she looks really dirty? When will she hit rock bottom? So sad.

  74. Lairen says:

    So you know how we’re always saying ‘she’s definitely on something’? Well, does she get drug tested? I’m not sure how the system works. But shouldn’t she be getting drug tested? If not, then that’s not right.

    Also, wearing white after labor day isn’t really a thing here on the west coast. We get summer weather 90% of the year here in LA. People wear white all the time and nobody cares. I actually always thought the Labor Day thing was some sort of joke until I visited New York and realized it was a real fashion rule.

  75. Ron says:

    Hey Gee–all good points–Except the theater thing–she is a film actress and I doubt she could handle theater well–so many film stars can’t. And we don’t want to frustrate her back to the crack ;-)

  76. Nina says:

    While her makeup is horrible and makes her look like she’s beaten and bruised, we’re all overlooking an important fact:

    SHE’S NOT ORANGE!!

    I never thought Linnocent would give up on her fake tanners but I guess she feels that money is better spent on meth.

  77. boo says:

    I think the shading on the hollow of her cheeks is supposed to give her “puffy” face some shape. I think Lilo must look at these websites and see pictures of herself looking like a chipmunk with the mumps. So, let’s do some shading, except in her case, which means she gets nothing right, the shading is too dark and it looks like she’s got dirt on her face. How the mighty have fallen, except in Lilos’s case she does not think so, delusional and denial are her middle names.

  78. Francesca says:

    She loves the attention; it’s a drug for her. What a total mess she is making of her life…

  79. OhMyMy says:

    I applauded when the judge refused to give her credit for her “11th hour” work she managed to get in at the Red Cross. They probably had her sitting at a desk doing something simple like alphabetizing index cards or stuffing envelopes. You know if they allowed her to take that work home with her Ali, Eleanor and Pootie did it for her.

    It really frosted my cookies when SCH had the nerve to say to the judge…well maybe her work at the Red Cross that she’s not getting credit for can be her consequences. What???? Excuse me. I’m sure there’s lots and lots of volunteers for Red Cross that take their commitment seriously and proudly put in their free time to go to training classes and work. Saying something like that was a slap in their faces. Shameless.

  80. TG says:

    Lindz should take a page from Michelle Rodriguez’s book and just do her jail time rather than bother with community service. Michelle rocks!

  81. lucy2 says:

    Yay! Go Judge!
    The ridiculous part is has she just done what she was ordered to do in the very beginning, she could have moved on ages ago, and possibly had some hint of a career left. But she repeatedly shot herself in the foot, and now look at her.

    LOL at the blush comments. Seriously, what the hell?
    So glad they didn’t give her yet another chance.

  82. Devon says:

    It’s really sad that she is support her 3 siblings and mother. But that aside, it doesn’t excuse from not fulfilling her obligations to the court. It’s called organizing and prioritizing your life. In 5 months, she completed 21 hours of CS. I think her grand total of CS, at her next court date and if she completes the 32 hours at the morgue, will be 55 max. If she isn’t found in violation, yeah right, she has 5 and a bit months, CS is suppose to be completed on April 23, 2012, to complete 425 hours. It’s not going to happen. Either way she’s going to jail.

    From reading the Probation Report, she went to the dentist on the 14th. That makes me giggle.

  83. Kloops says:

    Attempting to contour out the coke bloat? Fail. Getting a spanking from the judge? Winning!

    Just do your damn time already and go away ya cracked out whore. Ugh. Enough already.

  84. Happy21 says:

    I can’t stand her and think she deserves what is comming to her but I can’t help but feel a teeny weeny bit sorry for her. I wonder if she is sitting there thinking she’s queen shit or if she is sitting there wondering where the hell her life went wrong.

    Unfortuantely, I hold her mother accountable for everything this twit has done in the last 5 years. Her mother is a vile, vile woman who pimped her daughter out to Hollywood at any cost. She has been Lindsay’s enabler for as long as the trouble has been in her life and its so unfortunate. Her career is totally over. I give it another year and she’ll be as washed up as they come and we’ll all be saying Lindsay who. That is if she lives that long, of course.

  85. SEF says:

    As the judge says, if LL had EVER taken any of this seriously, she’d be long done with probation.

    Does anyone else besides me love LL’s lawyer? She seriously works hard keeping LL out of jail . .. despite the fact that she HAS to just hate her by now. Hats off to her.

  86. Innocent says:

    Her outfit was great and she has bailed out now :D

  87. NM9005 says:

    November 2? Going to invite the girls (in my head) over, make some popcorn, lean back and enjoy this s*.

    Ps: yes, I’m a sad person with no hobbies =).

  88. Thea says:

    OK. Last night she had someone doing a blow out on her hair. I think we should print this persons name so that they should get banned in Hollywood. Her eyes are CRAZZZZZZZZZZZZY. I just wish once the judge would snap on her when she is laughing upon entering the courtroom and smirking with her lawyer. It pisses me off she is insulting the women at the DTWC and yet she is a “hooker” by all means over seas. I think she should be sent overseas to live out the remainder of her sad pathetic life. Along with her hairstylist and makeup person. And the other Lohans.

  89. the original bellaluna says:

    But did you catch the judge’s “I’m not surprised” after Holley said “Your Honour, she’s brought her bailbondsman today?” Am I the ONLY ONE who caught that? Because that was PRICELESS!

    OK, look, in SoCali, that “no white after Labour Day” doesn’t apply to us. It’s an East Coast thing, not a Cali thing.

    As far as that “blush situation,” maybe she’s practising her corpse look for a Halloween party.

    Or trying to blend in with the dead bodies to get out of actual CS WORK at the morgue.

  90. LeeLoo says:

    Hooray for Judge Sautner! Sorry I was not apart of the live post but I was in class. I think Judge Sautner was waiting for it to all fall apart and for Crackie McCracken to sink herself. She needed a valid excuse for revoking probation and she got it.

    So…do you think Lindsay will do her 16 hours of morgue time?

  91. Orange Cone says:

    Her Johns didnt show up to bail her out? Well, I never!

  92. Boo says:

    The “she supports her whole family” excuse is bullshit. Lots of people have spouses and children and real, honest-to-God FULL TIME jobs, and they manage to fulfil their obligations because they know they HAVE TO. Shawn Holley just repulses me with her neverending blather. It is her job to defend Lindsay, not to lie for her. I hope the judge calls her on the tap dancing lies she told today.

    “Oh, she had to go to Europe because she supports her family and no one will hire her here, and that is why DWC fired her!”

    Ten minutes later, we all learn Lindsay was fired BEFORE she ever left for Europe.

    Shawn and Lindsay are both bleeding warts on the ass of society.

  93. Lairen says:

    @NM9005 – lol I’ll come over! I’ll bring cookies :)

  94. the original bellaluna says:

    And re: supporting her family:

    *Her OLDER brother is like 27 or older, college-educated, and should therefore be supporting himself;

    *Ali has a modeling contract with a “reputable” agency and should therefore be making her own money;

    *WO has supposedly been in “tha biz” for over 20 years and is able-bodied, and should therefore be capable of making her own money;

    *Milo sells recorded conversations & “exclusive interviews” to anyone with a mike, website, and cash and is able-bodied, so therefore should ALSO be capable of making HIS own money.

  95. MacScore says:

    @#91 Innocent’
    “her outfit was great”…. what the f*** are you smokin’?

    YOU LOSE! YOU LOSE! YOU LOSE! Mother Cracken, your pathetic joke of a daughter has now lost all sympathy she might once have had.
    And for those of us on the other side of the pond: thank *** that the US is not totally in awe of its fake, artificially created celebrities. Don’t think Blohard is going to be getting too many new “work contracts” over here in Europe anytime soon. Send her over here if you must. I promise you she will disappear.
    Roll on Nov. 2nd and the next installment.
    Evening All.

  96. Devon says:

    @the orginal bellaluna, I heard that and it was priceless! That with the “suppose to be an actress,” calling her out about the CS “not fulfilling to her” and not counting the 9 hours she did at the Red Cross where the best parts IMO. The whole thing was a lesson is HOW TO BE A BOSS by Judge Stephanie Sautner. I said it in a chat that I’m going to make “suppose to be an actress” my ringtone.

  97. NM9005 says:

    @Lairen: whoomp whoomp allright, I love cookies =D!

  98. laurie says:

    OMG go over to TMZ and check out what her duties at the morgue will be. They say she will have to clean tables autopsies are performed on and there are body fluids and parts left behind that need to be disposed. She will also be sweeping floors, cleaning toilets, washing windows, and picking up trash. There is NO WAY she is going to make it. Priceless!!

  99. OhMyMy says:

    @original bellaluna: You forgot Milo’s Fame Whore Fight Club event planning ventures.

  100. the original bellaluna says:

    I doubt she’ll be handling body parts to disposed of – she’d probably try to inject them in her lips or cheeks – and I think there are laws that apply to the proper disposal of said parts, and we all know Linnocent doesn’t obey laws!

  101. Ruby Red Lips says:

    @ Laurie, oh that is too perfect! Can u imagine Linnocent doing that?! She’ll have to be cr*cked off her head to even go through the door!!!

    Raising a supersized cracktini to judge S :D

  102. Ruby Red Lips says:

    @ Bellaluna, she’ll prob stash a couple of spare livers in her chanel bag ready for when hers gives out!! ;)

  103. Devon says:

    TMZ is saying that Linnocent finally gets it and will be at the morgue everyday until her court date. Hands up if we’ve heard that one before.

  104. OhMyMy says:

    @Ruby Red Lips: Or she’ll be smuggling out body parts for Tyler Shields to use in his “photoshoots”.

  105. MacScore says:

    @bellaluna [post 99]
    You said it girlfriend. For those of us who _actually_ work, support children, care for loved ones, bla blabla, this former-famous whore is a puss-filled screaming skank on wheels.
    ‘Nuff venom for now.

  106. gg says:

    You do not wear stuff like that in court. FAIL. Metallic shoes and purse, jaunty scarf?? PLEASE …

    She’s still trying to look like Marilyn Monroe, including the dead black smears on her cheeks.

  107. Lisa says:

    she looks like a corpse bride!

  108. Sillyone says:

    Just to clarify Her Honor said that Lindsay must do two eight hour shifts each week until November 2…I am not looking at a calendar but I believe that will be a total of 32 hours she must do before November 2. She changed her wording at the very end to clarify her ruling.

  109. Sillyone says:

    Oh by the way does anyone hear Dina in 3…2…1…”That judge is mean and jealous of Lindsay and she is just out to get her.” I bet she throws a bitch fit until Judge recuses herself.

  110. the original bellaluna says:

    Ruby Red & OhMyMy – So gross! So so very gross! (And I forgot about Milo’s celeb-whore boxing matches.)

    Anyone who has ever worked 2 jobs to support their family; ever cared for young children while caring for an aging/dying parent/family member; ever cried while dropping off the kids at daycare/school so we could “bring home the bacon” and keep a roof over our kids’ heads; ever busted a new crack in our ass trying to get through college while working full time and having a family:

    WE HAVE NO SYMPATHY OR EVEN EMPATHY FOR LINDSANITY.

  111. Bess says:

    You know what’s amazing? Lohan takes none of her obligations seriously except working to “support her family”.
    There is NO REASON that she needs to support any of them.

    -Her mother is 49 years old and healthy she could get a job.

    -Her brother Michael is almost 24 with a college degree and should be able to support herself.

    - Ali is supposedly a model and should support herself.

    The only minor in the family is Cody and he’s Dina’s & ML Sr.’s responsibility.

    Linnocent doesn’t have a chance as long as her mother remains in her life. Dina and the rest of them will “yes” her to death.

  112. OriginalGracie says:

    “While this family has never been really stable, things have gotten even rockier lately. Their child is in serious trouble, and the parents can’t agree on how to handle it. One wants to get the child into rehab right away. The other thinks that the situation isn’t that bad, that rehab is ‘below’ their child, and that if news of the real problem became public, the child’s career would be over. With all due respect, Parent, your child is a freakin’ meth addict and has already completely fucked up their life and career! Get them to rehab before they die! Yes, we know it will be painful to temporarily let go of your meal ticket, but there are things at stake that are more important than your pride or your wallet. What kind of example is this setting for your other kid/s?” [Blind Gossip]

  113. hottathanholywatta says:

    her getting handcuffed is my new screen saver, anytime I feel down I will look at it and say ” Hey at least thats not me”

  114. Ruby Red Lips says:

    Lol @ OhMyMy ;)

    U know she’ll do this CS now just to keep herself out of jail…wish I could see Linnocent actually cleaning up body fluids (obv not the ones she gets paid for!) that would be priceless!

    Still I doubt Linnocent will ever get it, just thinks the whole world is out to get her!

    Putting 2nd Nov in my diary – cannot miss this one too!!

  115. Hellen says:

    Okay, this is from Fox News (yeah, but I had to read EVERYTHING about this fab crackfest this morning!)

    Quote: “Lohan had started performing community service with the American Red Cross instead of the women’s shelter, but Sautner said that would not count toward her probation because it was not part of her sentence.”

    So – what really happened here? Did Cracken just decide ON HER OWN that she would work our her probation requirements with the Red Cross? Did she call and ask for refuge from the meanies at the Women’s Center? Did the Red Cross say okay but not check with the courts?

    Or did I misunderstand what Judge Sauter said?

  116. Lindsey G. says:

    1) Youse guise calling her LL hurts my feelings. IRL, people call me Lindsey Lou or LL. Whambulance.

    2) This cracked out broad (giving Lindsey’s a bad name) needs to spend some time in the pokey. A month at least.

    3) I’d ask where her mother is, but her mother’s a POS too. Instead, where is Bebe Buell? She can knock some sense into this little girl.

  117. JoleenMean says:

    Isn’t she about time for her to be added to the ‘Faces of Meth’ website?

  118. Poison Ivy says:

    Best Movie of 2011: 25 seconds of Lohan getting cuffed and rushing out

    Can’t stop replaying it…:-)

  119. angelus says:

    She makes expensive clothes look cheap in a way that is truly exceptional. That’s talent.

  120. Ruby Red Lips says:

    @ Original Gracie, From that blind do u reckon that her real problem is not only the v obv meth addiction (maybe heroin) but that she’s now officially resorted to being a hooker?? Makes sense…& how revolting that this implies Dina actually knows about this!!!

  121. Jayna says:

    There is odd bruising on her cheeks. It’s not just blush. She’s had some new filler put in and bad a reaction. She is scum.

  122. Sillyone says:

    @Hellen The probation department set Crackie up with the Red Cross when the women’s center said take a hike. They thought they were helping her and all they got was her and themselves in trouble…

  123. buckley says:

    hahaha..release the cracken!
    NOT!
    Brilliant moniker, kaiser.

  124. She recently had injections in her face and she is black and blue, and trying to cover it with makeup. I am sad to say that this has happened to me and it is NOT PRETTY.

  125. MorticiansDoItDeader says:

    I see she got that role she wanted so much as a zombie on “The Walking Dead.” such dedication coming right from the set in her special FX makeup. Bless her heart.

    Does anyone know how many hours of community service she completed?

    Now back to reading all the comments.

    *waves @the original Bella, @Madisyn, @ruby red, @brin, @cherry rose (keep up with those studies, and don’t worry you’ll do great)*

  126. Psyren says:

    Looks like she went to the dentist at some point and got something done about those frightening teeth.

  127. Dorothy says:

    The sadest thing in this is that Lindsay shows no suprise or embaressment by the handcuffs. Anyone else would have been mortified. Can you imagine spending a couple of years in and out of court?

    And the fact that it was stated that she supports her family. THAT should embaress the hell out of her mother. No child should be responsible for her family …. especially a woman (Dina) that has no clear reason not to work. Her mom is what most would call a Leech.

  128. DreamyK says:

    Douchescarf. The trend is officially over. LiLo has killed it.

  129. ViloDeMenus says:

    She’s going to have to cut out her hair extensions when she’s sentenced in Nov, and she will be going to jail then, or they will simply take scissors to her hair and cut them out. All that money wasted on her ratty weave. Oddly even though I know she deserves this I do feel bad for anyone 25 who has done this much destruction to their life and career and still thinks people are out to get her instead of seeing that she has some real problems.

  130. Jo 'Mama' Besser says:

    I don’t think Holley is any more a wart than are any of the other individuals in that courtroom who aren’t criminals. She has put out of her mind the fact that everyone is watching her and writing about her every day and deeply, deeply dislikes her client and the Hollywood Bribe Precedent. People are going to be hugely biased against her for that alone, and now she has to shoulder the burden of her client’s amorality? My side-eye goes to Cracktasia, not the woman stuck with her. Her arguments wouldn’t be so increasingly threadbare if devil in the gold pumps gave her something to defend. This is why I’d make a terrible defense lawyer, I would have coiled myself into a ‘forget this noise, it’s your crime but not my time’ position before day one. Pimp slaps aren’t liberating when you’re slapping the one you’re allegedly liberating, and as Holley is one of the few people hanging around that joint right now, her still-young career couldn’t take the televised hit. A very frustrating reality to work with when she doesn’t doesn’t have to the ability to snap her fingers and become invisible when things get dicey. That was Richard Mulligan on Soap and I’ve seen Soap and I want to know if Jessica Tate is still in that coma in South America.

    If you want to blame someone, blame the Hollywood Gavel All-Stars who have stuffed Lohan through the justice sluice myriad times and the ‘you stratch my balls’ correctional morass that repeatedly tosses anyone’s faith in the LA County court system out with the sewage water with alacrity. Not all of the people who get arrested are guilty, not all repeat offenders and hugely unpleasant and destructive forces, but I don’t think the Venn diagram would necessarily put those two circles at opposite ends of the planet. She has to work every angle when attempting to defend her seedy-ass clients, it’s her job. And she’s been stuck with this Typhoid Mary of a case for so long, it must be enervating. Since it’s so painfully clear that Holley doesn’t relish this experience, her job isn’t to shape the law and her duties to expedite the cushiest ending possible for herself with caviar mojitos on demand and paid sick leave and Sautner can’t throw Tweeky-Boozy Tooth Bang down a mineshaft.

    They’re professionals, they know the law, they know the county, they know what lies are, they know they’re on tape. And I’m not talking about a Lance Ito situation.

    If an oncologist can’t say ‘smokers, go home’, Holley can’t drive her buddy’s car into the side of Lindsay’s house and go get ‘tore up’ in the Caribbean.

  131. Seal Team 6 says:

    AM SO MAD I JUST GOT BACK FROM MY APPOINTMENT AND MISSED THIS TODAY!!!!!!!!!!

  132. Embee says:

    I’ve been thinking about the probation folks, and I think they padded their report to give the judge an “out” in the event that she continued to go easy on Lindsay. That way the judge could say “I had nothing at hand to indicate that Ms. Lohan wasn’t in full compliance with her probation.” Guess she went another way, huh?

  133. Sam says:

    i’m confused as to why she went to court in a full face of halloween makeup?

  134. MorticiansDoItDeader says:

    @the original Bella, @ruby red, I know laws vary state by state, but I can’t believe the Morgue would have her cleaning autopsy tables etc. When I pick up bodies at the morgue I’m not allowed to bring in unlicensed persons as my removal assistants, because I’m exposing untrained persons to a plethora of diseases. Here in NJ you must pass OSHA training in order to deal with human remains. She’ll probably be cleaning windows and doing filing.

  135. hh says:

    she is becoming a dana plato. wouldn’t be surprised if she killed herself. she’s lost almost everything.

  136. Madisyn says:

    I’m sorry everyone. Between 3 posts here, reading TMZ’s BS (at times), chat, updating (this morning only) the betting pool, and a family meeting that took over 4 hours for my sister and I to bicker over my very healthy 84 year old mothers will, (leave it to my ssiter to interrupt today, of all days) I’m here at the party and as promised to all you sports and Judge Sautner fans, I give you the SEVEN LAYER LOHAN DIP

    1. Weed (bottom layer)
    2. Percocet
    3. Dilaudid
    4. Adderall
    5. Oxy
    6. Vicodin
    7. Crack (of course)

    Bon Crackatit, enjoy.

    I haven’t even begun to read the comments on the last 2 posts (the first one, I think I read them all) here alone but I’m going to read every single one of you ladies’ posts because I just about live for them.

    I hope everyone got what they wanted today, I know I have, and we will have a blow out of all blow outs 2 weeks from today. Now lets see what all you Crack Cliquers are saying.

  137. Seal Team 6 says:

    A close friend who is an attorney in LA County, and they and their colleagues are appalled SHC was so disrespectful to the Judge, and that the Judge didn’t reprimand her. They said attorneys in LA County routinely get held in contempt of court for less.

  138. Hugh Mungus says:

    What was with the black cheeks? Has she been sweeping chimneys?

  139. Seal Team 6 says:

    The blush is to “hide” her coke bloat.

  140. Madisyn says:

    Today was Christmas in Cracktober. Come the 2nd, it’ll be Christmas in Crackvember!

  141. the original bellaluna says:

    Morticians – Cali is a notoriously litigious state, so I can’t imagine it would be “acceptable” (however desirable) to have her cleaning up body parts and/or bodily fluids. (I will pay for pix of her cleaning toilets, though.)

    I can also see the Cracken claiming (suing for) damages for “picking up” one or more diseases (including ones currently not known to man) that are already percolating in the walking petri-dish that is Blohan. (And it’s 21 hours, same as last trial – none of her “CS” at Red Cross counts, as Judge never approved the switch.)

    *marking Nov 2 on calendar with a crack-sharpie in death-by-Blohan-cheek black*

  142. ocean says:

    i want to see her GO TO JAIL and stay there. I never understand why people with money or celebrity status have different rules than the general working public. I also hate looking at her gross photos every day. She needs a reality check~

  143. laura says:

    makeup must be b/c of her new role as prostitute?

  144. the original bellaluna says:

    Jo ‘Mama’ – I LOVED Soap! I was so upset when it got cancelled (mom & I used to watch it together when I was a kid), and I’ve watched re-runs whenever I’m able to find them.

    Ruby Red – You know WO takes her 15% off the top, so of course she knows. Nasty, VILE woman that she is!

    *waves to all the Usual Suspects*

    Mad, pass that dip, please; I’ve been waiting for it!

  145. Firecracker says:

    Seal team, that’s what I thought (the parts I didn’t have it muted). Shawn was calling the judge wrong in some instances. I thought she really pushed it. And the looks and body language were the same thing.

    Does anyone know where I can watch the complete appearance? I’ve looked all over, I can’t find it! Everyone only has 3 minute videos.

  146. Seal Team 6 says:

    @Sillyone

    WO already said that in the open thread.

  147. Madisyn says:

    bellaluna

    I promised you my dip, I delivered. *passing dip and crackviar on crackers* (Finally) How was today?

    Where are Boo, Bess, Firecracker? I’m where I’m suppose be. I know Ruby Red is down for the night.

    Hope everyone had a cracktastic day. Nov 2nd, will be even better.

    Nevermind, found Firecracker.

  148. SueZen says:

    What will she be required to do at the morgue? Hopefully not make-up, after today’s appearance …but seriously, what would her duties entail?

  149. skeptical says:

    TMZ has a few snippets up… sadly i missed the livestream.. but if anyone knows where the full recording is I’d sure love to see it!
    :D
    Cuz i really want to see this Judge fully react to the whole “didn’t find it fulfilling” thing :D :D

  150. anonymoose says:

    i truly do not care about this unrepentant fool or her family.

  151. the original bellaluna says:

    Mad, thanks, it’s delish! It was pretty good today. Nov 2 is also gonna be a pretty good day, I think.

    skeptical, I too would love a full recording of this, or a link to one. The snippets are okay, but the whole was…glorious!

  152. Memphis says:

    If she is sentenced to jail in November for violating her probation will she actually have to GO to jail (like extensions out – I’m going to shank you in the shower jail) or will they just give her 10 minutes in county and more probation for violating her previous probation. I mean I know what a “normal” person would get but what about Crackie? Do you think she will serve any real “hard” time?

  153. Firecracker says:

    Belleluna, I’ve found Madisyn!

    Edit oops, I typoed your name. Sorry!

  154. Dawning Red says:

    @MorticiansDoItDeader:

    You said that you’re not allowed to bring in unlicensed persons as your removal assistants, because you’re exposing untrained persons to a plethora of diseases. But in Lyndzie’s case, wouldn’t *she* be the one exposing the corpses to an innumerable amount of viruses and bacteria? :p

  155. Camille says:

    What a mess she is. She has fallen so, so far. I wonder if she will ever come back from all of this. I also have to wonder how low her rock bottom really is. I shudder to think.

  156. Shy says:

    You know what will be the biggest punishment for Lohan? Judge needs to put that SCRAM thing on her and make her do weekly drug tests for a YEAR. Can you imagine how hard will it be for Lohan not to drink and do drugs for whole year?

    And I still don’t understand that stupid system. I think that that rapper T.I. has violated his probation and they put him in jail almost immediately. Why can’t they put Lohan in there? And there were so many rappers, even women who went to jail. But it’s always overcrowded for Lohan.

  157. OriginalGracie says:

    @Ruby Red Lips: YES, that did occur to me!

    I really do not put anything past Dina.

    When I saw that Blind Item, I immediately thought of Our Lady of The Crack Shenanigans.

  158. Jen D says:

    I just skimmed the comments, but I love that, from what I could see, no one “feels sorry” for her, or feels that she “just needs help.” Remember when people felt that she had potential? Remember Mean Girls? She was Tina Fey’s girl!

  159. MorticiansDoItDeader says:

    @Dawning Red, Ah! Touché. I also agree with @the original Bella, I bet she’d sue the state and claim that she contracted Hep B etc., from cleaning up bodily fluids at the morgue (when, in fact, she picked it all up from her johns and sea Jasper sharing buddies).

    @Madisyn, that’s one potent dip! Great job ;)

  160. Hellen says:

    @Sillyone: Thanks for the info.

    @Seal Team: Sorry I missed that in the open thread (it was crackie info overload!)

    And damn, now I am gonna have to ditch that apparent douche-scarf I just bought.

  161. Madisyn says:

    Dawning Red

    “Wouldn’t *she* be the one exposing the corpses to an innumerable amount of viruses and bacteria”?

    LOL

    Like others have said, she won’t be mopping up ‘bits and bobs’ of the remains, she’ll be cleaning toilets or mopping in public areas. She’s not qualified to be ‘handling’ the corpses or their parts.

    *Waving* at Morticians

    I’ve just begun reading all the posts, I’m late, family thing. It had to be today, of all days. But I’ll get to your comments soon enough. I’m on post 75 on the ‘open post’ thread, haven’t even begun these on this thread.

    Was today the best or what? What was your take? Favorite part?

  162. Cirque28 says:

    Why, if it isn’t Daisy Buchanan from The Great Gatsby!

    From neck to knees, that is. The rest is hair extensions + fillers + the avenging ghost of Coco Chanel + a really terrible morning-after at Studio 54. Add a dash of self pity and stir.

  163. HannahF says:

    I missed the open post and hvnt gone back to read the comments. I’m a Cali Family Law atty and had to be in court this afternoon so I couldn’t take part in the festivities. I did take a 10 min break and caught the tail end+handcuffing.

    So, I was dead wrong on the CS hours but vindicated myself with my prediction of the outcome—a pissed off judicial officer and a VOP hearing. The jail/prison overcrowding in CA is a huge problem. Therefore my guess is that Lindsay goes back on house arrest. However, this time there will be VERY rigorous rules.

    With respect to her outfit, I definitely got the Marilyn/Innocent vibe. Although the white past Labor Day rule doesn’t apply in Cali, we do pay attention to temperature. It was a cooler day today. All I know is that I as well as my female opposing counsel wore black suits AND I saw no one in the courthouse dressed like LL.

  164. Lucky Charm says:

    @ original bellaluna, Soap is on Antenna TV. (Sunday nights @ 8 & 8:30 where I am. I know, because I watch it sometimes, too! And “To catch a thief”.)

    I think the best thing for Her Crackness would be to serve 18 months in jail, then 12 months in-house rehab followed by 18 months probation with a SCRAM bracelet and regular drug and alcohol testing and AA meetings. And a restraining order against Delusional Dina would be icing on the cake. (Too bad SHE can’t be the one to get supervised visitation, instead of Gabriel Aubry!)

    I still think she will get jail time on Nov. 2 (real jail, not the county circus she was at before). And she’ll make it through the first week at the morgue, but will have trouble & fall short the second. You know, because all those dead people and stuff aren’t fulfilling!

    Darn, I’m in moderation so please pass the delicious 7 lohan dip and a couple of cracktails. I may as well enjoy the wait, right?

  165. dovesgate says:

    Does anyone know where I can find where the feed was recorded? I WANT TO WATCH!!!! *sniffs pitifully*

  166. Kimberly says:

    So LL is saying that getting blow snorted off your freckled, coke zitted, flat ass is more fulfilling than a woman’s center where she may recognize a fellow crackhead in dispair?

    sounds about right

    she’s a whore. literally.

  167. Madisyn says:

    First off, whose sending 3 dozen roses to Judge Sautner?

    HannahF

    YOU were wrong on the CS? Girl, WE were ALL wrong on the CS! None of us was even in the ballpark. I had to award a winner by DEFAULT to the least amount of hours to LeeLoo.

    Lucky Charm

    I used the same amount of hours as you, and not one of us on the bet was close. Not that we know the ‘official’ number as of today, someone will hit the number on the head, as we only have 10 days to choose from.

    *Passing dip and 2 double cracktinis* One for now, one for 5 minutes from now.

  168. Boo says:

    Hey Madisyn, Bess, Bella, and everyone! I had to teach a 3 hour class tonight and missed all the evening snark! I too am hoping for some honest-to-God jail time; even if prisons are overcrowded, that doesn’t mean that no one can be sent there. And with 5 VOPs (is that right?), there’s awfully good reason to break the whole “misdemeanors don’t go to jail” thing, as she cannot seem to learn any other way. It will be interesting to watch it all play out. I truly want someone to say, you look stoned, let’s give you a drug test and see–under what conditions could the judge decide to reimpose drug/alcohol testing? She is still on DUI probation, as we all know, so it is not outside the realm of possibility. The fact that Steffy brought up cocaine today was interesting, too, as I always assume that the judges pretend that never happened.

  169. Madisyn says:

    MacScore

    On the ‘open post’ thread, you said, “we await the next proposal for Nov. 2nd!

    Everyone has to agree but I like ‘k.i.s.s.’. “Keep It Simple Stupid”. So I was thinking doing along the same lines as before. Guess the hours of CS performed in the next two weeks, yes were going to have massive duplicate guesses and whether she goes to jail/no jail/house arrest.

    If we start with what ‘restrictions’ the judge might impose, as well as the above criteria, it could get dicey, too many variables.

    I’m open to suggestions, lets hear em!

  170. dorothy says:

    We’ve all said she’s fallen so far….I think she’s at bottom. Everyone knows her career is over, surely she knows that too. With the exception of prostituting herself out to wealthy Europeans, what else has she got? I truly expect to see her obit any day now. Sadly, that’s the next step. Don’t you agree?

  171. Bess says:

    Did anyone else read this on Rumor Fix?

    An upset and teary Dina Lohan reveals exclusively to RumorFix that she reached out to her troubled daughter over the phone just moments after Lindsay was handcuffed and hauled into custody.

    “It was just mommy telling my child, we’ll get through this — just get through this,” Dina shared with us. “It’s just upsetting — I’m in tears now– we’re just upset!”

    Lindsay’s mother says she was stunned Los Angeles Superior Court Judge Stephanie Sautner revoked Lindsay’s probation. “Usually in New York state — the judge usually follows the ruling of probation and they didn’t in this case.”

    “She was cutting Shawn [Lindsay's attorney] off a lot and wouldn’t let her speak and tell them the hours Lindsay did complete, and she still had six months to complete hours at the Women’s center. I am kinda at a loss for words at this point — because the facts weren’t able to be stated on Lindsay’s behalf and there are many more facts that she did complete two other courses as she was working and had to go overseas.”

    Dina says she has already booked her flight and is rushing to Los Angeles to be by her daughter’s side.

    “She’s trying to juggle a lot of balls right now and survive. Her main concern is to complete her hours before work and everything — but she has to pay her bills — I’m doing as much as I can as a parent.”

    http://rumorfix.com/2011/10/exclusive-dina-lohan-in-tears-tells-lindsay-well-get-thru-this/

    ** Classic Dina- delusional and in denial.

  172. Hakura says:

    Guys, I know I don’t party on the Lohan-Express with full abandon very often… But I’ve had one hell of a fucking week. I want the *works*, guys, slide it down the bar, stat!! (Maybe one of the toxic-level drinks with the cute little ‘umbrella’ made out of a condom wrapper…)

    I agree that arms should be covered in court, as a conservative sign of respect. (Yes, I know she has no respect for the court or anything else, but she could at least pretend for the sake of her own case). I’m surprised her lawyer isn’t given the last word on what she wears, as it’s obvious she can’t pick anything remotely appropriate for herself.

    @Jules“does anyone else notice how GLAZED her eyes are? definitly on something.”

    I know, that drew my attention too. I thought they looked red, like she’d been/was crying, but being on something (or having a monster hangover) is always a possibility.

    @Happy21“I can’t stand her and think she deserves what is comming to her but I can’t help but feel a teeny weeny bit sorry for her.”

    I’m with you, It’s an annoying ‘empathetic’ reaction to feel sorry for how messed up she is. Sadly, if she’s thinking about where her life has gone wrong, it’s probably making her want to self medicate even more, so she doesn’t have to actually deal wih whatever went wrong.

    @SEF – Totally agree. No matter what I think of Lindsay or her actions, I have to give Shawn C. major props for working her ass off with such an obviously ‘difficult’ client.

    @Boo“Shawn and Lindsay are both bleeding warts on the ass of society.”

    Thank you, so-much, for the mental image that inpired.

  173. hmmm says:

    I was in transit all day and so I missed the show!

    The sweetest moment is the photo of LL in handcuffs. Yesssss. I know she’s out in two shakes of a lamb’s tail. No matter. She was publicly cuffed!

    I hope it’s true that Judge Sautner is drawing out her humiliation. Shaming in the public square is the best thing that could happen to La Linds. Next step: general
    population.

    BTW, the only people who use that goulish manner of blush are those with dementia, the blind, and drug addicts.

  174. Boromir's bytch says:

    Any truth to the rumor that her community service with the Red Cross was going to be conducted from her home?

  175. Bess says:

    Madisyn,

    What do you think about Dina’s statements to Rumor Fix?

  176. Heather M (Heather) says:

    Once I showed up late to an Xmas party where my sister had been waiting, in angst, for hours b/c she was meeting my then boyfriend who was a bit of a “rock star,” so she was super nervous & wasted by the time we arrived. She kept reapplying her makeup, hour after hour…drink after drink…and she looked like this by the time we arrived.

    I can only presume that Lindsay got wasted & kept applying her makeup, out of nervous anticipation…there is really no other excuse for this clown makeup over-application…

  177. smh says:

    hideous bag, hideous clothes, hideous person. the court will not punish her because they feel her looks are enough punishment onto her.

  178. Laura says:

    I can see why she went with white (It’s symbolic of innocence and I’m sure LiLo thought she could use all the help she could get on that front), but she definitely should have covered her arms, not just because she was in court, but also because those babies are looking Rrrrough. They’re blotchy (and not because of her freckles, other wise), uneven (why does her tan end two inches above her wrists), wrinkly and there’s that business on her left bicep that I always end up staring at for five minutes. I still have no clue what it could be.
    So, yeah, cover up those arms, LiLo, and if you could find something to cover your face that would help, too.

    Also, I kind of love Shawn’s faces. This is the lawyer who about a year ago begged to be removed as LiLo’s lawyer and was denied, yes? I swear every time I see her now her face seems to be screaming, Please sentence this girl to some hard time so I can get on with MY LIFE!

  179. sue says:

    I actually feel sad for Lindsey. She has a farked & drugged up family. Don’t think she ever had a chance to turn out ok. Coming from a family with addictions, it’s hard to not become your family. You have to fight with everything in you to escape it. It’s not easy and people shouldn’t judge. Life isn’t as easy as saying she deserves it or she needs to clean up. She is surrounded with enablers and the media doesn’t help. The media probably pushes her into the rabbit even deeper. She looks like hell, and looks completely dead in her eyes. She will be dead in a couple of years or sooner if she doesn’t change. Hope she does go to prison, at this point it’s the only thing that will save her. The judge needs to send her prison so she can get away from her druggie friends and crazy family.

  180. Ogechi says:

    I hardly read or comment on anything abt Lindsay. All I can say to her is- please pick up your pieces and be a role model. Have u not disgraced yourself enough? What kind of life is this? I really feel sad for this lady. May d Angels help her.

  181. ManicPixieDreamGirl says:

    Aside from her spoiled attitude and sense of entitlement, Lindsay has nobody around her willing to tell her the truth. That’s the problem. She surrounds herself with hanger ons, yes men, and people who use her. Loads of other children grow up with parent’s that have failed them, yet they continue to go on and be successful. Until she’s ready to hear the truth and surround herself with people that are going to call her on her bullshit, this stuff(addictions/jail time/hooking/making bad decisions time and time again) will never end. I hope she figures it out before it too late.

  182. Danielle says:

    OMG IM IN CRACKTINI HEAVEN…limitless cracktinis to sautner!!!,ok as for the crackens face,she clearly did a faceplant on the pavement before court,and totally looks like mary shellys bride of frankenstein,love,love,love,when holley asked if she could be booked right there and sautner said”no,she has to go into custody”,lindsay did say”oh my god”and then the beuatiful noise of *clink,clink*,nov 2nd will be the superbowl of the CRACKEN

  183. mollination says:

    1. No white after labor day is an outdated rule that no longer applies.

    2. It’s pretty common for those with legal representation to not speak, hence why her lawyer would need to “check” vs. Linds just chiming in. If she said the wrong times/days, she could f herself royally. Hence why she’s paying for a lawyer to be on top of it and word things correctly.

    3.Yes, her makeup looks like hell and I also agree that you should cover your arms for court.

    4. What about when the judge said “I hear she’s supposed to be an actress” to Linds’ lawyer!??!?! GOLD!

  184. normades says:

    The whole white after labor day rule doesn’t apply anymore. That outfit was unappropriate for other reasons tho.

  185. The Truth Fairy says:

    Such corpsey makeup – WOW!!

    Fifth mugshot – there are career street walkers on Hollywood Blvd that don’t have as many.

    One thing that I found interesting was the judge’s mention of a new California law regarding jail time for misdemeanors. She seemed to be saying that a new law prevents her from sentences jail time for misdemeanor offenses. Does this mean Lindsay has no risk of going to jail?

  186. Danielle says:

    @bess….LMFAO…dina said “lindsay is trying to juggle alot of BALLS right now???….who’s?…vikram’s or phillips?

  187. Danielle says:

    @dina&ally….NEVER!!!!!!

  188. Danielle says:

    So,when lindsay was booked and released she basically lost 1 hour and 37 minutes of good crack time…oh,the nerve!

  189. Scarlet Pimpernel says:

    I would really like to see LL have some sort of epiphany, get rid of all those enablers in her life telling her she’s fabulous and fine, take some time out and clean up. This tragicomedy she’s starring in is her life and is certainly more tragedy than comedy… it’s so sad. If she can spew out this much chaos surely she could be an amazingly positive force. Wake up Lindsay!

  190. Boo says:

    The Truth Fairy: no, not according to Harvey levin. She can still be sentenced; she will only serve 20% of her time, though.

  191. the original bellaluna says:

    That quote from WO on rumourfix just perpetuates and exemplifies Lindsanity’s problem.

  192. Danielle says:

    @bellaluna….makes me wonder what dina would do if lindsay actually died???

  193. lola lola says:

    Blah blah blah. What I want to know is What happened to her handbag?!!?

  194. Hakura says:

    @Danielle“makes me wonder what dina would do if lindsay actually died???”

    She would do as she’s always done. Make excuses & find someone else to blame for everything. (Most likely her father, the entertainment industry, the tabloids, the criminal justice system, or the ‘inadequacy’ of the rehab programs).

    She would have *no choice* but to convince herself of those things, because accepting the truth would be totally unbearable.

  195. Danielle says:

    @hakura….yes,that sounds about right,its obvious lindsay is just like her mother….blame everyone but themselves

  196. Danielle says:

    lindsay”This crap is not fulfilling,move that paperwork,im going somewhere else….hahahahhahahahahahhaha….not with sautner on yer ass bitch!!!

  197. Danielle says:

    With all of the stress and pressure from yesterday and today, I’ve never been so happy to go to therapy!!!! Also, I’m sorry for the confusion that I may of caused to those at the Coroner’s office. Won’t happen again, now I know where to go! Thank you for your help.

    lindsays tweet 12 minutes ago….hahahhahah

  198. Statler says:

    Bad makeup? Couldn’t make it through all the comments (and it’s probably too late anyway), but that’s clearly bruising on the right side of her face. Notice the smaller bruise above the temple area, by her browline; she’s trying to ‘hide it in plain sight’ by using matching makeup on her left cheekbone.

  199. the original bellaluna says:

    Danielle – WO will be at the bank, trying to collect on that life insurance policy, while she’s on the phone with any outlet that will listen, blaming everyone but Linnocent. (And herself, of course.) No member of CLAN OF THE CRACKHEAD is EVER at fault! For ANYTHING. EVER! (Move that policy insurance investigator! I’m Dina Lohan!)

    (and I am LOVING your new avatar!)