David Beckham’s latest H&M ad campaign: is he stuffing his drawers?

Ah, Goldenballs. This morning, CB, Bedhead & I were emailing about these new H&M ad campaign photos of David Beckham, and the conversation quickly turned to the size of his, um, BULGE. Bedhead asked if we thought Beckham was really packing this seemingly oversized equipment, or whether he stuffs his drawers. It’s unknown. I’m guessing that there is some kind of stuffing, padding or something to make the bulge look so “pronounced” and, might I say, SMOOTH. But Bedhead also reminded us that Victoria once bragged about David’s equipment, comparing the Becksdong to a “tractor exhaust pipe.”

In other Becks news, the Family Beckham will not be moving to Paris! There were tons of rumors (and even some confirmations) that David was going to sign with Paris Saint Germain, and that his family was going to move to Paris with him. But David seems to have pulled out of the deal, and he’s looking to sign on for another year with the LA Galaxy. The reason given? David doesn’t want to uproot his family. Which… I believe. David and Victoria both seem to genuinely like living in America, and I remember David making some comments about how the boys have adjusted very well to LA, and how they even have American accents now. I think Victoria might be happier in LA too – her whole fashion company is based in LA and NYC, right?

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43 Responses to “David Beckham’s latest H&M ad campaign: is he stuffing his drawers?”

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  1. Helen says:

    There’s something there alright and it ain’t just the dong & co. ;)

  2. lolworthy says:

    Does it have to be so effin obvious? Ruined them for me…though, I’d still hit it pretty hard.

  3. Turtle Dove says:

    The bulge is different sizes in each picture, so I go for stuffing.

    Why do men have to look so angry in their advertisements? What does that say?

  4. ShanKat says:

    I think he…uh…I…guhhh…what was the question?

  5. NO SH¡T says:

    Don’t like the hair style but love the pics. He’s probably holding but not as much as the pics would like you to believe.

  6. Girl says:

    Wow. That’s a beautiful man.

  7. inthekitchen says:

    Those pictures are horrible. First off he looks like he’s about to punch someone in the throat or he’s just pissed as hell…not very sexy. Second, his arms look insanely too short. And third, his legs look completely photoshopped – totally different in the black shorts than the gray ones.

    Whoever approved these shots should be fired. I’m too busy wondering what happened to his tiny arms and why he scowling at me to look at his fake package.

  8. podzol says:

    It looks like he hangs horizontal dong in the first H&M picture. Just me? Or does his ballsack weight 2 kg, creasing the whole thing down?

  9. Jackson says:

    He looks creepy as Hell in that first pick – channeling Jack Nicholson in ‘The Shining.’
    Re: the bulge, or what looks more like a shelf stuck in his shorts….we all know they photoshop every part of a woman for photo shoots so lets not all pretend they don’t do the same for men.

  10. Franny says:

    that just looks like really bad photoshop. it looks like a freaking shelf.

  11. Ash says:

    I’d still screw the crap out of him.

  12. Franny says:

    also, if the rest of the pictures aren’t as heavily photoshopped as the first, then “trunk briefs” is fitting ;)

  13. Reece says:

    Where are the old Calvin Klein(??) underwear ads? Let’s compare!

  14. oh dear says:

    i dont like that angry look. i prefer the “lets get it on” look when it comes to underwear ads lol

  15. Tee says:

    I agree with the photoshop comment but that doesnt mean he is not packing :) )) I would tend to believe his wife. I have seen David in person many times at Galaxy games and he is even better looking live! However in these shots he looks stiff and uncomfortable.

  16. Rita says:

    I don’t know what’s all in there but that appears to be a lot of junk.

  17. Peachy says:

    The new ad campaign for Bubble Wrap just got stiffer.

  18. Trillion says:

    My question is, why would Posh know anything about tractor exhaust pipe dimensions?

  19. Lindsey G. says:

    I’m guessing he has huge balls.

  20. Princess Lizabeth says:

    Stuffing. The first photo looks like he’s used a sandwich for the stuffing, as his area looks rather square-ish. What kind of sandwich? PBJ? Watercress? Tuna? You be the judge.

  21. Kim says:

    Who cares! Stuffed or not he is the hottest man on the planet!!

  22. Callumna says:

    He’s a beautiful, god of a man.

    But I hate tats. He’s such perfection and Tommy Lee’s tat parlor can’t approach the beauty of nature and fine living. But his dumb wife had plastic bags sewn into her chest so I guess they’re even.

  23. samantha says:

    It looks like like the same face photoshopped on each picture at a different angle lol. Looks like David perfected only one type of stare for this shoot.

  24. Lolaluvsu2 says:

    Everything its perfectly balanced, just like his life.

  25. samira677 says:

    Obvious stuffing. He never looked this big in the Armani ads.

  26. Shy says:

    Beckham is slowly moving to C-List territory. His best days are over. It happens. Victoria never made it in America. She is still popular only in UK and in other places people don’t really care. She got her last big press time with that girl. Now there isn’t anything interesting about her.

    And I can’t believe what he did to his arms. Those poor arms. It’s cool and fun when you have few tattoos and people can see them and they mean something. You can show them off to your friends and say: “Look this means this and this means another”. But when it all painted like David did it just looks dirty and you can’t see any tattoo. It’s all one big dirty gratify.

    • sammib says:

      What??? Umm, she has a fashion line that has been well recieved by Fashionland (Anna Wintour et all)and is being worn by celebs all over the show. He is still being wooed by HUGE football clubs in Europe because he sells tickets. That’s why Galaxy paid so much for him. Maybe in your world they are over but trust me for most of us in the Western world their star still shines very brightly indeed.

      • Shy says:

        HUGE clubs… You are talking about French club PSG? I believe that is the only club that David was associated with during this winter break. There are 3 big football Leagues in Europe: English, Spanish, Italian. Then there is German league in forth place. And then there is French league.

        Those are HUGE clubs: Chelsea, Man Utd, Arsenal Barcelona, Real, Milan, Inter, Juventus, Bayern Munich. NONE of those clubs showed any interest in Beckham during winter brake. And keep in mind that he will not go to Euro-2012 tournament. Couch will not take him because he is not showing great football since he moved to MLS.

        I’m not saying that he is C-Lister. I’m saying that he is moving into that territory. He used to be A+ lister few years back. Now he is B+ with A name recognition. Look at him – poses in underwear. I’m kind of embarrassed for him. Now his body is the only things that he can sell?

        And please don’t mention Anna Wintour. I immediately remember how LaineyGossip laughs at Victoria that it has been so many years and still Anna Wintour didn’t gave Victoria US Vogue cover. And that is the only thing that Victoria dreams of :)

        I don’t know about UK. Maybe she is still popular there. But outside of UK no one cares about her. She may do things. Olsen Twins probably have fashion line and do things. Every B-list celebrity has fashion line or jewelry line or something. It doesn’t make them A-List celebrities. Victoria still has name recognition. But outside of that no one cares about her.

  27. PyrLover says:

    Can’t stand this dude, his wife or his package. Just don’t care.

  28. DreamyK says:

    He’s a hot hunk of man meat. I loathe that hairstyle though. He looks the best when he wears casual clothes and his trademark Burton Truckstop slouch beanie. I don’t ever want to hear him squeak, I mean speak though. It’s just kills it for me.

  29. JaneWonderfalls says:

    If he is stuffing or not, either way I can’t really tell…

  30. LR says:

    Re: his facial expression – the underwear ad is aimed at men, no?

    Maybe the angry face says, “I’m styled within an inch of my life, and you, random allegedly heterosexual man, are looking at my carefully oiled down muscular body & prominent package in a magazine ad.

    But there is absolutely NOTHING gay about this. Grrrrr! See, I’m a scowling tough guy. This is all very heterosexual. Grrrr!”

  31. Spugz says:

    Oh My Lord ….. *moist*

    His full sleeve tats are gorgeous now and his face is perfection. He can go C list for all I care, maybe I’ll have a chance!

    As for his voice – meh, who needs conversation when you look like that.

    *still moist*

  32. eternalcanadian says:


    Definitely photoshopping or airbrushing or stuffing or wrapping because the male genitalia is not smooth. There’s lumps and bumps and crevices.

    But not bad looking. :P

  33. Original Bee says:

    I was shocked when I heard his voice for the first time. His face and body don’t match that Mickey Mouse voice at all.