Rupert Everett: ‘I did sleep with Ian McKellen, I loved stalking people’

Do you like Rupert Everett’s latest face? Rupert has had a lot of work done over the years, and while I’m happy to see that he no longer looks like a bloated, frozen Ken Doll, he really doesn’t look like himself anymore. These pics are of Rupert leaving the ITV studios where he appeared on a talk show – which brings me to my good news! Rupert got a job! Amazing. He’s on the London stage playing Oscar Wilde in The Judas Kiss. And you know what that means… lots and lots of new Rupert quotes as he promotes his play!! Rupert – much like Morrissey, another deeply bitter Englishman – is rather famous these days for being a nasty piece of work, for bashing gay people (he’s gay) and gay marriage and gay adoption and loads of other stuff. So what’s Rupert talking about these days? Everything!

Rupert says Oscar Wilde is his Jesus: “He fills me with the same compassion that Jesus fills other people with… As a gay person he’s really the beginning of the gay movement in public…’Before Wilde, a woman would never have spoken about homosexuality, the words to describe it were things like “pathic”, “inverted”. Really he gave homosexuality its profile. And from that moment on I think the gay movement started.”

Rupert is really a writer, not an actor. No, wait, he’s BOTH! “I really love where writing has taken my life and I definitely want to go on doing it… One of my aims is to try and write screenplays for myself to be in. And I’m trying to get my Oscar Wilde film off the ground as well. I’d like to write another memoir and novel hopefully.”

He doesn’t like the socio-economic changes in England: He said “the face of London is totally changed,” due to an influx of very wealthy tycoons, joking he could soon become a “court jester” to “some oligarch”. He also condemned the Government as “ludicrous” and modern day conservatives “poisonous… The generation of conservatives under me is much more poisonous than my generation… Yes there’s still a class system but it’s more than that. We are about to become like the Indians were during the British Empire, a service station to a new class, the uber-rich.”

He’s not posh, he swears: Joking he would become a “courtier” in his interpretation of new London, he added “we” would no longer be able to afford to live in the capital “because they will have priced everything out.” He emphasised he was not a member of the upper class himself, despite his public school education.

He was a Catholic slut in his youth: “I was a slut. I loved sex.” Asked if he just loved sex or was furious with Catholicism he replied. “Both. You were told [at school] that if you got a hard-on, you should turn over and say a Hail Mary. You somehow make it work for yourself, but it gives you lots of bubbles inside. I wanted to tear everything down, and the way I found to do it was sex. They didn’t necessarily have to be attractive. It depends how the lights are hitting you and how the drinks are hitting you. My whole life was about sex, really, in one sense or another.”

The 1970s were for the blacks and the gays, but not so much in the ‘80s: “People were really turning against gays — they had been so popular in the 1970s. Being black was rather popular in the 1970s, too.”

He slept with Sir Ian McKellen: “I did sleep with Ian McKellen, I loved stalking people. Now it’s illegal, such a shame. Such fun.”

His 2012 comments about gay marriage: “Why do queens want to go and get married in churches? Obviously this crusty old pathetic, Anglican Church – the most joke-ish church of all jokey churches – of course they don’t want to have queens getting married. It’s kind of understandable that they don’t; they’re crusty old calcified freaks. But why do we want to get married in churches? I don’t understand that, myself, personally. I loathe heterosexual weddings; I would never go to a wedding in my life. I loathe the flowers, I loathe the f–king wedding dress, the little bridal tiara. It’s grotesque. It’s just hideous.”

[From Pink News, The Telegraph and Gay Star News]

Rupert is such a big YIKES. I don’t understand how he can embrace so much of the old-school “gay experience” and at the same time bash everything about the current, modern gay rights movement in England, in America and all over. What do you make of his class warfare? There’s a genuine point buried in there about the service economy and colonialism and London becoming the playground for the super-wealthy… but Rupert just seems mad that HE is not one of the super-wealthy.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet.

 

You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.

110 Responses to “Rupert Everett: ‘I did sleep with Ian McKellen, I loved stalking people’”

Comments are Closed

We close comments on older posts to fight comment spam.

  1. marie says:

    I’m sorry, I can’t get past his face-wtf did he do to it, it’s like Keith Richards pre-wrinkles..

    • T.Fanty says:

      That’s so sad. He was so beautiful.

      And young Ian Mckellen? I totally would, just for the voice. Now I just want him to adopt me and take me to his pub.

    • gg says:

      He looks more like Vidal Sassoon now.

      Poor Rupert – being so angry at everything is toxic for everybody. He seems like a depressed person and is lashing out.

      But I think he identifies with Oscar in many ways. I wish he would identify with the nice, carefree side of Oscar without the demised tragic part.

      • olaf78 says:

        This isn’t necessarily directed personally at you, but:
        At some juncture, pointing out how bitter other people are begins to sound quite bitter itself. Or at least judgmental.

        From what was excerpted here, RE is not bitching about someone but expressing strongly held views of his own.
        Frankly I agree with his bafflement at gay people who want church weddings – when an institution has so wholeheartedly tried to eradicate or demonise you, why would want to belong to them?

        And what he says about the service society we are making and fear of the ruthlessness (and dishonesty) of the new generation of conservatives; these are thoughts I wish more people would have. (and work to do fix, if possible)

    • Ravensdaughter says:

      He was so pretty-it’s like he went out of his way to age up.
      Okay, coming out didn’t help his career-he wanted to be a leading man, not a character actor, apparently- but being so damn bitter about it (and TMI chatty) did a great deal more damage than admitting he was gay.
      I suspect H’wood is the problem area with coming out anyway, not the British film industry. The Brits put more value in acting.

  2. Cherry says:

    Sorry, I’m not going trough the whole interview to find out, but was there any particular reason for him to let us all know he slept with Ian McKellen? Or did he just decide to casually mention that? ‘I slept with Ian McKellen. My favourite color is blue. I have two goldfish. Do whatever you want with this information.’

  3. andy says:

    I expect better from Sir Ian.

  4. sasa says:

    We need hilarious, out there queens like Rupert. It balances out the crusty old calcified freaks a bit.

    • Kimbob says:

      I totally agree. I know Kaiser has her reasons for not liking him…& I respect anyone who is honest w/their opinions…I do. Nonetheless, I find myself at the opposite end of the spectrum w/regards to my opinions on Rupert.

      This is how I feel about him: he’s campy, outrageous, completely “out there” and refreshingly HONEST about his opinions/outlook, and he’s not ass-kissy & worried about being “politically correct.” He plainly and descriptively flat-out states his opinions, & does not PANDER to be liked or falls over himself trying to be politically correct. What’s not to love?

      Rupert can give an opinion and soundbite like no other. I actually kind of dig how he shocks & offends unapologetically. At LEAST he has an opinion, isn’t afraid to give it, & most importantly, stands behind what he says. You don’t see that very much nowadays.

      • MacScore says:

        @ Kimbob: I totally agree with you! And, to all Celebitchy fans, Rupert’s best-selling autobiography, “Red Carpets and Other Banana Skins” (2006), is “funny, outrageous, and extremely well-written” (The Daily Mail), “continuously brilliant… a superb and unexpectedly inspiring achievement” (The Guardian), and, “If Lord Byron’s memoirs had been grabbed from the flames, they’d have been like this… soulful and brilliant” (Sunday Telegraph)… etc. etc….
        So, yes, not only is he a great actor and an outspoken public figure.. but he also CAN write. Team Rupert!

      • giddy says:

        Ditto. Totally love this man. Pissy-tude and all. He totally “gets” the fact that gay marriage is an oxymoron. Not because gays or gay couples are bad…but that being gay was not about living a traditional hetero lifestyle. If gays want it — white dress and tiara — then knock themselves out — but “why”? That’s Mr. R’s point.

      • Marie Antoinette Jr. says:

        Love his refreshing candor. And I totally agree with him about the silly pageantry of weddings. It’s always made me cringe as well.

  5. spugzbunny says:

    Oh people need to take him less seriously! He’s just a catty queen of which we do a wonderful breed of in the UK!

    I also like his face. I think he looks good.

  6. sasa says:

    And look at him rock that cross necklace! lol

  7. Eleonor says:

    His face looks weird.
    He isn’t Madonna’s bff anymore?

  8. gg says:

    I have to wonder why he’s wearing a cross. It actually means something to some people. Don’t slam something and then put it on, that is flaky.

  9. Bored suburbanhousewife says:

    He’s ruined his beautiful face.

    What does he mean, exactly, by saying he “slept” with Ian McKellan. Is this bad of me to wonder?

    • Hautie says:

      what does “slept” with mean…
      ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

      I suspect it means they saw each other without any pants on. Then shagged like crazy.

    • LAK says:

      ‘Slept with’ = ‘had sex with’ ps:- doesn’t allude to sleep of any kind and may or may not invlove beds!!!

      Is this another British colloquialism?? I am always surprised by expressions we take for granted not translating to other english speaking countries, especially America.

      • The Original Tiffany says:

        Uh, us Americans use the same phrase.

      • Bored suburbanhousewife says:

        No we are familiar with the euphemism. With heteros, most likely to mean p in v, is there a specific meaning for it with gay men? Is it mutual beej? Is penetration involved? All of the above?
        I must be extra bored today to get this prurient.

      • MorticiansDoItDeader says:

        @bored, during a pretty in depth conversation with a gay male friend I learned that 1. There are some guys who don’t give or receive, but do oral and handies only 2. There are those that are tops only, or bottoms only (power bottoms) and there are some that will be a top or bottom. I think sleeping with someone in the gay community indicates oral or anal. This same friend and I also play gay or straight lol and he insists zac Effron is straight as an arrow! Now if we only knew if Ruppie was the top or bottom in this tryst with Sir Ian 😱

      • Bored suburbanhousewife says:

        Thanks Mortician! Fascinating! I’m betting that tops and bottoms would probably surprise people!
        It’s probably often not who you would guess.

  10. epiphany says:

    Remember him in ‘My Best Friend’s Wedding’? He MADE that movie – everyone else was a prop for his “George” character. I feel nothing but pity and compassion for him now; to have done this to his formerly uniquely handsome face and his almost self loathing comments are a clarion call for help. I hope he gets it.

  11. sasa says:

    I’m so tired of the he/she ruined his/her face with plastic surgery comments. It just reenforces the notion that people are indeed obsessed with looks, the very notion that makes those who have surgery do it in the first place.

  12. Darlene says:

    Bitter. Old. Queen. It’s sad.

  13. JL says:

    I think Rupert has hit that age of:

    I’m me, I will do what I want, think what I want and say what I want.
    You may like it, love it or leave it.

    Quite freeing actually.

    Let the man be himself, if he wants to jack his face so what? It’s his face!

  14. Really? says:

    I think he looks great, he’s smoothed his facial borders, but he’s left the lines inside, very smart move.

    And speaking of smart, his quotes and quips are very, very witty indeed…

    I really don’t see how anyone can say anything against him. He’s funny, down to earth, with good taste and worldly experience…there is so much worse out there to complain about! He’s playing Oscar Wilde on stage, not bitch slapping chavs on a reality show, for god’s sake!

  15. LAK says:

    I love Rupert.

    He is witty, bitchy and funny.

    Americans don’t get the type of acerbic Brit humour that Rupert or Hugh have. They take their musings completely seriously and or at face value.

    • Bored suburbanhousewife says:

      I found both books of his I read completely hilarious. It is telling and kind of worrisome to me that there are really quite a number of British actors who are well educated and write wonderful, not ghost written, books, including fiction. Doesn’t seem to be same level of wit and erudition on this side of pond amongst the American actors.

      • LAK says:

        I put Rupert in the same category as Noel Coward who was incredibly bitchy, and funnily so.

      • jinni says:

        I think that’s because it seems a lot of British actors that make it come from upper class backgrounds. These people have attended public schools (which I believe is the equivalent of private school in the states). Where as it seems a number of American actors are from working class/lower middle class backgrounds. So, I’m sure if more upper class Americans became actors they’d sound as put together as the British ones.

      • LAK says:

        @Jinnni – you are correct. Public school in UK means private school.

      • EscapedConvent says:

        You’re right & I could not agree more. His books are wonderful & I hope he keeps writing.

      • MorticiansDoItDeader says:

        Yes all of us Americans are knuckle dragging troglodytes with inchoate senses of humor. Our greatest pleasures are sitting around all day drinking bud light and laughing at fart jokes.

      • TheOriginalKitten says:

        Believe it or not, wit and acerbic humor are not exclusively owned by Great Britain.

        I get a bit exhausted by the common misconception that British humor is somehow too sophisticated for Americans.

        In case you didn’t know, Jon Stewart and George Carlin were born in the United States.

      • LAK says:

        My pointing out that Americans don’t get certain types of Brit humour isn’t a comment on American humour. I am sure there are aspects of American Humour that Brits don’t get too.

        For the record, whilst i think John stewart is acerbic,i don’t find him funny or witty.

        Never heard of George Carlin.

      • giddy says:

        Oh for pity’s sake…the brits actually READ books. There’s the difference. And they don’t think being an actor is all about a camera pose. Even UK students that don’t attend expensive “public” schools are expected to read the great books (at least some of them) and be more than “aware” of Shakespeare. And they still teach English grammer in the UK — dispite having lots of immigrants where english is a second language. US continues to dumb-down education so that everyone is equally stupid.

      • TheOriginalKitten says:

        …or maybe some people simply find Everett’s comments distasteful and unfunny? It might not be a matter of “getting” the humor at all.

        George Carlin is arguably the smartest, funniest and most influential comics in history, and I’m not saying *american history* but history, period.

        That’s ok if you don’t think Stewart is funny. I certainly wouldn’t accuse you of not “getting” Stewart’s humor because you’re British. That would just be ignorant of me to make that assumption.

        *shrugs*

        Guess it’s all subjective and maybe not a matter of nationality at all like you make it out to be.

      • MorticiansDoItDeader says:

        @giddy, that’s downright xenophobic of you 😊

      • Chatcat says:

        giddy…to use your own words here, I think you just “dumbed down” this whole dialog.

        Clearly you are not an American have zero knowledge of what is or is not taught in US public schools or private schools. I am now perhaps dumber for having read your post (and face slap myself) and for my response to it.

        I think I will go off now and find my copy of “The Importance of Being Earnest” which I have had since the 7th grade, and grab an ale and sit on the divan whilst reading it…AGAIN!

      • The Original Tiffany says:

        Yeah, we Americans don’t even know what BOOKS are. Sheesh, we are obviously so damned stupid we can’t read books. I guess the freaking library of books that I own and love…well, I just like the pretty pictures in those novels, yes that is what it is.

        Please tell me you aren’t ignorant enough to buy into BS like that and you are just taking the piss. Please.

        Back to the BudLight (gah, piss water, I’m having Brunello tonight) and fart jokes! Right, Mort???

      • marie says:

        ha ha, you ladies are cracking me up. now, pull my finger..

      • MorticiansDoItDeader says:

        👈 hey Marie! Hehe 😂

        🍺 <~~~ this buds for you Tiff 😜

      • The Original Tiffany says:

        Here is what makes me scoff at you Giddy and any other xenophobes. It’s laughable the way you broad brush Americans. It seems you buy into the lowest sort of stereotypes. You prove your ignorance by accepting idiotic lowbrow movies and stereotypes as fact. UGH.

        It is like us saying you all have crap teeth and are boring as hell. You all can’t even be bothered to say hello or meet someone’s eyes when in public and on the tube. Yes, I have lived there, not just visited.

      • LAK says:

        @OriginalKitten – i certainly wouldn’t be offended if you told me i didn’t ‘get’ John Stewart because i was British. As a British person, i have different influences and cultural sign posts as do you, growing up American. [ps:- i am assuming you are American?]

        our cultural experiences influence what we find funny.

      • Leen says:

        With the whole debate going on, I find it weird that apparently you either need to be British or American or raised in an English school or an American school to get American/English humor.

        I’m a Palestinian and lived in both the US and the UK, I get both humors and saying all Americans are dumb and apparently English people are very cultured and etc is extremely ignorant and stereotypical. Being a foreigner in both countries, I have met dumb people on both sides (one of my ex-housemate was dumb as a box of rocks and had no idea that there exists a world outside of England and the Middle East actually has water/electricity/cities), same thing can be said of some of the people I met in the US. The point is dumb people are everywhere and please don’t act like English people are holier than thou because I can tell you a million stories about the dumb/ignorant people I’ve met in England. Why, just turn on the Geordie Shore and you can see a bunch of dumb people that Britain has to offer.

      • TheOriginalKitten says:

        @LAK-
        “our cultural experiences influence what we find funny”

        My problem with this statement is that it’s phrased as an absolute and that’s just not true. A more accurate statement would be “our cultural experiences may/may not influence what we find funny.”

        At the end of the day, humor is entirely subjective, based on the individual. I think based on the comments made by Americans (and non-Americans) on this board, you can see that many of us appreciate what you call “British humor” . Funny has no nationality.

      • sasa says:

        It is a generalization that makes sense because it has a basis in facts. Without being exposed to a particular culture you can’t find the humor in it. You would stare in wonder at the things Chinese, African, Russian… people find funny.

        American and British cultures are more similar and therefor the humor can travel over borders but there are still many differences.

        Like the bad teeth example. It was stated that it is offensive to the Brits to joke about their teeth. I completely disagree (and so do a lot of Brits, hence the cultural difference). If American teeth are on average better then British teeth (which they are) it is fair game for Americans to joke about it. Many Brits even find humor in the fact that Americans often think that the teeth jokes are offensive when the Brits largely don’t get offended by them.

        For the record, I’m neither American nor British.

  16. NerdMomma says:

    Sad? Bitter? Really? I laughed my way through reading those excerpts. He is hilarious. I don’t see sad or bitter at all. I see a sarcastic fellow who sees life with humor.

  17. Amanda says:

    Rupert is my Bitch Queen Hero

  18. Madpoe says:

    Oh Sir Ian McKellan how I adore you! Please tell me you were giving it out for charity, it was charity right??

  19. kariodi says:

    Check out the movie “Another Country” to see how beautiful he used to be.

  20. Tiffany says:

    The thing with Sir Ian, was that pre or post facelift. If it was pre, I could see Ian hitting that. Post, ummm…No Ian, just No.

  21. tracking says:

    Good lord, I didn’t recognize him!

  22. Jayna says:

    I was turned off by him writing about Natasha’s death in his last book. He started it by saying she popped her head in his dressing room after his show and he wished he had invited her to dinner and then went on to talk about her funeral. Then he talked about being at her first wedding and all observations about her. Then he talked about how he was invited by her ex-husband to go to the viewing the night before. I thought she was a friend and felt the story was a little distasteful describing her in the casket and how her mother acted at the casket (far too personal info), and then got to the end of the passage and they hadn’t been friends at all over the years, kind of stayed away from each other for reasons, and I just felt he put it in to help sell his book.

    I will always always always love him in My Best Friend’s Wedding. He was amazing. That ending scene with him and Julia was brilliant. What charm he had. I enjoyed him in that 1999 movie with Madonna, Next Best Thing.

  23. Themuseisnotenchanted says:

    Lay off the MOZ, he is not bitter at all. Just speaks the truth about certain subjects.

  24. Shad says:

    Karl Lagerfeld is bitchy. This guy is just plain bitter.

  25. Moi says:

    I like his honesty. But I do wish that he would let some of Oscar W’s humor flow through him as well. Oscar also had to marry a woman to keep up with appearances at that time. Writing about homosexuality was his way of expressing his hearts desire, which eventually got him exiled out of England. But at least he was able to live the life that he wanted in Paris afterwards. I can’t wait until Rupert is an old geezer, that’s when I want to hang out with him.

  26. aims says:

    Rupert is a bitchy queen. Hes the type of guy you would want to sit next to at a dinner party. Hes harmless, witty and funny as hell.

  27. Moi says:

    Regarding OW: Well not the life he wanted, considering he was broke and living in skwaller, but…..no longer in hiding about his sexuality or who he was.

    Felt the need to correct that. ;)

  28. Gia says:

    I love him. I think he’s hilarious and refreshing in a world filled with PC BS. He’s entitled to an opinion…and I happen to agree wth him! WHY would a gay man or woman want to marry in an institution that flat out rejects them?? It’s ridiculous. And the thing about the dress and flowers. I love it! lol. He’s hilarious!

    and i forgot to mention that I used to have a huge crush on him when i was a teenager (about 20 years ago *gulp*) and was pretty devestated when I found out he was gay. Obv, I have no gaydar.

  29. Annie says:

    Well, as a Londoner I think his comments about the uber-wealthy in London are spot on – there’s been a massive influx of foreign money since the financial crisis and it’s pushing up property prices so much that regular people are struggling to get by. And, as he says, our government couldn’t give a toss.

  30. Loulou says:

    He can bash the faux gay orthodoxy because he’s anti-establishment about it. Why, in a way, would gays seek to replicate some of the constructs that oppressed them? In a way it makes no sense. Or, is it that gays too lack imagination in creating new models for themselves. It would be infuriating to be squeezed between that and Everett would be outspoken about it because for him, it’s been about sexual expression whereas gays seeking to marry are expressing love in a monogamous promise to their other half.

  31. Beatriz says:

    Omg the interview is HILARIOUS, loves it. Yes, he’s a bitter c-u-next-Tuesday, but who cares, I think it’s kind of refreshing. He does have major issues with accepting his own sexuality, reminded me a little of Tennessee Williams. Also, this site is always so apologetic of Karl Lagerfeld and I don’t see a really big difference in the stuff he says.

  32. I loved Rupert and haven’t seen much of him lately. I think the facial changes are alright but he needs a few sessions of botox to refine and enhance the surgery.

  33. EscapedConvent says:

    I’ve always loved Rupert. His droll cattiness fits him, & I think his interviews are a scream. He was my first “droll witty British” crush. I like him as an actor & wish we saw more of him.

    What he’s done to his face—well it’s upsetting because he doesn’t look like himself anymore. Check “Dance With A Stranger” (with Miranda Richardson—a great movie) & you’ll see why some of us used to clutch our pearls over Rupert.

    • sasa says:

      I also prefer Rupert’s “old face” to the new one. But he obviously didn’t like it very much because he decided to change it. We all need to learn to respect that people define their own appearance to their liking. It’s only upsetting because there is the notion that what you are used to is what you should get. Rupert is still the same old bitchy queen, he just has a new look.

  34. Pink Elephant says:

    Funny guy, can’t say I disagree with him on many things – hetero weddings are dreadfully dull/silly to me – and this interview reminded me that sarcasm does NOT translate well to print, not at all. Seemed tremendously catty/obnoxious until I pictured Everett delivering his comments. That dry manner that only flaming British actors of yesteryears can pull off…ha. Hahahaha. Take him seriously and…don’t at all!!! Glorious! :)

  35. TheOriginalKitten says:

    I admit that I haven’t read his books but I don’t find anything particularly witty about his comments here. Really, to me he just sounds like an asshat.

  36. Claire says:

    More plastic surgery gone bad. I liked his ‘before’ look much better. Heavy on the pancake makeup and funky eyes now.

  37. Louise says:

    I dreamt once I slept with Gandalf, in a graveyard in broad daylight and he was wearing a pink cowboy onesie.

    Honestly, it was so random. Almost as random as this guy spurting forth a conquest.

  38. Bec215 says:

    His face does not look weird – it looks less messed-with than most actors today, he just needs to wear less makeup…And I love his bitchiness and cattyness – if you’ve ever read his books, that’s his voice and I love it. I think people just want him to be like he is in movies – like Hugh Grant is an epic cad in real life, though being charmingly bookish in movies.

    And I’m a stright woman, but have to go with him on the hideousness that church weddings have become – the fact there is a bridal “industry” is so wrong, and the dresses ARE horrid…. Diamond engagement rings were a marketing ploy by DeBeers in the early 20th century, and your wedding dress was simply your Sunday Best until Queen Victoria went white for hers.

  39. Hmmm says:

    Anyone who adores Oscar Wilde is aces in my books. I also appreciate Rupert’s forthrightness. Shame about the face, though.

  40. Aud says:

    I don’t get his logic. He is everything that he supposedly despises: vain, nasty, etc.

  41. Jill says:

    Did he have work done? Something odd about his face.

  42. Scarlet Pimpernel says:

    I read his first autobiography, must go out and get his second, which came out recently and had great reviews – witty and outrageous!

  43. sharron says:

    I’m just reading his second autobiography – beautifully written, bitchy and erudite at the same time – and there’s a passage which reminded me of this photo….

    He talks about a reaction to being conned into making a TV show:

    “I swallowed hard and raised an eyebrow. I could that month.”

    :-) keep it up dahling, keep it up xx

  44. muppet_barbershop says:

    Face is still scary, but less so. At least he no longer looks like Wayne Newton.

    Kaiser, being cranky about the current state of gay marriage etc. while still being fond of old-school gay pioneers is NOT necessarily an oxymoron. For the first 10 years of it (at the beginning of which I’d only been out for 10 years myself), the assimilationism and acceptance-vs.-tolerance flavor of US, Canada and UK gay rights made me so ill. Why should we bust our butts convincing homophobes and other random jerks that we’re “normal” when, overall, we never will be? We’ll always be relatively small in numbers, and for I think a couple of decades still, we’ll still be having parades and funky sub-subcultures that repulse many traditional people. And that’s FINE. Putting all the importance on looking like the gays next door seemed, and still can seem, self-injurious and shame-loving to me.

    I myself finally gave in to supporting the current overall plan of throwing all our collective queer weight behind legalizing marriage for one reason, and one only. It was when gay marriage became legal in Spain. The country of the Inquisition, the most Catholic nation in the world (not including the Vatican), has it and the US doesn’t? As a Jewish-American lesbian, I cannot stand that. So for myself, deep down, I still think focusing entirely on reducing hate crimes and bullying, and on fostering desensitization and tolerance rather than a few people’s wholehearted embrace, would be a better plan.

    However, what I didn’t expect was that the anti-bullying movement/awareness would be so clearly fueled and strengthened by the fight to legalize marriage. So maybe the assimilationists were right from the beginning. Anyway, Rupert is not nearly as yucky to me as Morrissey is. I can see where Rupert is coming from. I’ve been there. I got over it, maybe he will too.