Adam Levine on his new, Dior-worthy celebrity fragrance: ‘It smells like sh-t’

Adam Levine

Here’s a picture of Adam Levine on Wednesday while launching his new “celebrity fragrance” (eponymously named “Adam Levine”) at Macy’s. He told E! Online that the scent “smells like sh-t,” which is actually rather creative, but I’m guessing the fragrance actually carries high notes of earthy, overinflated ego with a vague undertone of nutty, misunderstood douche. That’s just a guess, but I could be wrong.

What’s interesting about Adam’s latest career move is that, in 2011, he famously tweeted that he wanted to “put an official ban on celebrity fragrances. Punishable by death from this point forward.” Now of course, he’s revoked his statement since he’s looking to cash in on his own stink. Adam still insisted to Us Weekly that “I’m not a fan of celebrity fragrances,” but he thinks that his “anti-cologne” is worthy enouh to “compete with Dior.” Good luck with that.

In other Levine news, he and Justin Bieber are reportedly at odds with each other. It seems that, according to Star, Adam and his female cousin were attending a yoga class when Biebs joined in to admire all of the downward-dog poses in the room. Then Bieb started hitting on Adam’s cousin, and the latter was not pleased with the former’s moves:

Justin Bieber

It was a swag smackdown at Equinox Gym in West Hollywood when Adam Levine recently caught Justin Bieber checking out his cousin! “Adam brought his pretty female cousin into the same yoga class that Justin was in, and Justin immediately pulled Adam aside and asked who she was,” whispered an eyewitness. “Adam laughed at how forward Justin was and said, ‘It’s my cousin — you stay away.” But the girl-crazy Biebs was undeterred, says Star’s spy: “Justin couldn’t stop staring at her,and then he ran over and asked for her number. Adam was annoyed and told Justin to back off and be more respectful.”

In the end, Justin deferred to the Voice coach. “Clearly, Justin’s used to doing what he wants, but Adam put him in his place,” says our spy. Seems the young lady dodged a case of Bieber Fever — for now!

[From Star, print edition, February 18. 2013]

You do realize why Adam was so upset about this, right? Because Adam once told Details, that yoga was good for one thing — “Fuuuu-k-ing.” One can’t really blame Adam for not wanting Biebs to bang his cousin because it takes a douche to know a douche. Myself included.

Adam Levine

Justin Bieber

Photos courtesy of WENN

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34 Responses to “Adam Levine on his new, Dior-worthy celebrity fragrance: ‘It smells like sh-t’”

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  1. poppy says:

    your description is spot on. is this fragrance called ‘head up your ass by levine’ or ‘taint nozzle’?

    why would he bring his cousin to yoga, since it is for fuuuu-uuuu-king? he seems like the sort of twat that would use a family member to score. probably why he didn’t want the lesbeaver there.

    both of them. go away.

    bedhead = not a douche

  2. kas says:

    They should have a dance-off. Loser has to wear the winners fragrance.

    You know, ’cause they’re both so darn manly.

  3. allons-y alonso says:

    Just looking at Adam Levine makes me feel as though i might catch something unpleasant….

  4. Quinn says:

    Probably due to the fact that Levine ALSO wanted to get with his cousin…that sounds about right for this tool.

  5. Arock says:

    The pics of both of them in one post is too much. What is even talking about, why is he even talking. Maybe bieber was distracting him long enough so one of his entourage could take a dump in his gym bag.
    “ThErEs UR cElEbritY sCenT, LEviNE. L8R, Lol.”
    - six 14 year olds in saggy hammer pants and gold chains run from the locker room giggling under their trucker hats. Levine walks in….-
    “Damn you, bieber!!! Damn you and you beautiful tattoos!!!”.

  6. Victoria1 says:

    My friend has a thing for Adam Levine (I know! she also likes Bradley Cooper). I have to go make fun of her now.

  7. Gracie says:

    “Swag Smackdown” really? I can’t stand people who sexualize yoga, especially creeps leering at you while you’re trying to find your zen.

  8. Joiq says:

    Did anyone see Chelsea Lately last night with Dave Grohl hosting? He said (and don’t quote me exactly) that Adam’s fragrance was the “worst idea ever” lol. I am curious though.

  9. Shannon says:

    Great way to sell your fragrance. “It smells like shit, don’t buy it.” Hahahahahaha what a douchebag.

  10. Miss Kiki says:

    The fact that I would bang Adam Levine makes me feel sick. The only thing that would probably make me feel more sick is smelling his lame-o cologne.

  11. Willa says:

    I swear I read” Adams LAMEST career move.” Lol.

    • ??? says:

      Oh, but there are more lame career moves yet to come from this bugger.

      I believe he’s also begun dabbling in acting and has been (tentatively?) cast in some movie opposite “I insist on emoting with my clenched lower jaw” Keira Knightley.

      Perhaps Christina Aguilera was on to something when she told Levine (on an episode of The Voice) that he’s nothing but a a Justin Timberlake wannabe.

  12. bigt says:

    The world would be a MUCH better place if both of these dbags got shot into space never to return to our planet. Ahh just enjoying that thought now…a very happy place.

  13. ZigZagZoey says:

    A fragrance? Really? Surely he should have come out with a new douche product…

  14. Chordy says:

    I love it when the world’s biggest douchebags get all upset when someone is douching all over a lady in their family. The nerve!

  15. Mitch Buchanan Rocks! says:

    Think twice about wearing chemical fragrances – so many toxic ingredients – funny how the Pink campaigns seem overlook this.

  16. some bitch says:

    There’s something about Levine’s face that puts me off. Proportion-wise or something.

  17. TheOneAndOnlyOnly says:

    First he’s an embarassment to rock music, if i want rock i’ll listen to zepellin’s how the west was won;
    Second, how utterly conventional and predictable our national celebutards have become; they are so establishment it makes me yearn for the 60s;
    Third, The biebster’s fall from fame will be epically amusing and deserved.

  18. KellyinSeattle says:

    Anyone else tired of celebrity fragrances?

  19. Minnie says:

    If he would not talk, i’d let him have me.

  20. HH says:

    I don’t mind celebrity fragrances. I just hate when they are named after said celeb. A lot of people are guilty of this. Adam, Jennifer Aniston, Halle, etc. Why would I want to smell like you?!