Apr 10
'07
Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds Are Together

Scarlett Johnasson must have stolen my list of imaginary eligible men I would hook up with if I weren’t already engaged.

I am not pathetic. If Ross from Friends can do it, so can I.

First she goes out with Josh Hartnett, then Justin Timberlake. Now she’s been spotted this Easter weekend in NYC with Ryan Reynolds. Here’s what People Online had to say about them:

Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds spent a busy weekend in New York City together.

On Saturday night, the pair were seen getting close at the Manhattan restaurant Odeon. “They were in a good mood,” says one eyewitness who saw them laughing and smiling.

“They were definitely holding hands,” says another observer. “They were a cute couple!”

I don’t want them to be a cute couple! I have loved Reynolds since he was Berg on Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place, and I doubt Scarlett would appreciate the Berg-ness in Reynolds that has obsessed me to the point I had to especially subscribe to the ABC channel on Sky just so I can get my fix. I was only forced to do this after my fiance refused to let put up my Ryan Reynolds poster in our room.

Speaking of Scarlett, she was voted as having the “sexiest body in the world” by Glamour magazine. The magazine states: “With curves to rival Marilyn Monroe’s, Scarlett embraces old-school Hollywood style and exudes body confidence”.

Dammit! As long as people keep voting her the hottest thing since Tabasco sauce, she’s going to continue swiping my pretend boyfriends. I am going right now to my journal and officially shredding my list just in case she sees Cillian Murphy is on it. I might even grab a Barbie out of my daughter’s room and use it as a Scarlett voodoo doll. Just in case, of course.

Written by Jessie

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10 Responses to “Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds Are Together”

  1. vdantev says:

    This week anyway, they are together.

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  2. MaiGirl says:

    I wouldn’t worry, Jesse, since she goes through men like water. Your pretend boyfriend shall be yours again.

    While I liked her in Girl With A Pearl Earring (with your man CM, overall great film), on the whole, I think Scarlett is an overrated butterface. I think the pact with Satan that facilitated her career should be ending soon.

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  3. Jessie says:

    Thanks MaiGirl. I’ll take the pins out of the Barbie for now and go back to burning candles in front of my Ryan Reynolds shrine.

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  4. Anne says:

    I’m right there with you about Cillian! I haven’t seen much of him lately, sadly. I keep looking for pictures of his baby as well, but no luck yet. (Maybe he’s getting pointers from Ewan.) Can’t wait for Sunshine to come out, though.

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  5. Jaimi says:

    I laughed so hard when I read this…I can relate to it on EVERY level!

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  6. just me says:

    This girl is such a slut!

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  7. Busy Body says:

    I agree ScarJo is so overrated and she is slutty.

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