Last week Jenny McCarthy told the story, to US Weekly, about how she explained the birds and bees to her son Evan, 12. As is her style, Jenny gave some embarrassing details to the press. She said that Evan thought that sex was like footrubs (because she had told him that earlier) and that she found thousands of photos of foot rubs on his iPad. I was cringing for Jenny’s son. No kid needs to have those very personal details of their lives made public. That’s something that will be online forever, and Jenny is revealing it for a snippet of press. It’s not at all considerate of Evan’s feelings and right to privacy.
Fast forward to now and Jenny is again sharing another story that makes me feel for Evan. She said, on The View, that Evan is being deliberately ignored and bullied at camp but that he doesn’t realize it. Evan is autistic, but is she sure that he doesn’t know he’s being bullied? Evan may or may not be aware that he’s being taunted, but thanks to his mom countless other people do.
McCarthy claimed on The View that Asher is unaware of the bullying, because his autism makes it difficult for him to pick up on social cues. She said she was made aware of the situation when the camp sent her an email explaining that Evan’s “friends” are actually teasing and laughing at him — not with him.
“My son’s main goal is to make as many friends as possible,” McCarthy explained. “I said, ‘You have to find the kids that like you and are nice to you. Who do you sit next to in the cafeteria?’ And he said, ‘No one. I ask, and they say no.’”
On the upside, the boy isn’t hurt by the grim situation. His mother went on explaining, “It’s so wonderful that he’s not aware that the kids are making fun of him. But at what point do I need to teach him that? Do I just let him be?”
Fellow host Whoopi Goldberg offered her opinion, suggesting that McCarthy have a conversation with the children’s parents, making them aware of their kids’ behavior.
McCarthy has had her own experience with bullying.
She confessed to Ellen DeGeneres on The Ellen DeGeneres Show in 2010, “I would have girls wait for me outside of school with pipes to beat me up” during middle school.
Things escalated quickly in high school where the girls “were throwing pies at my face, pulling out my hair and spitting on me,” she claimed. McCarthy almost didn’t receive her diploma due to poor attendance because she was so terrified of the bullying.
Some people commenting on Radar are blaming Jenny for sending Evan to a mainstream camp where he’s not supported by staff, but I wouldn’t fault her for that. Bullying at camp can be hard to predict ahead of time, and it sounds like the staff is trying to stay on top of it. I blame Jenny for again compromising her son’s privacy to have a semi-interesting story to tell on her talkshow. Oversharing is her schtick, but she should not be subjecting her tween to that. Kids that age are very easily embarrassed. While Evan may seem like he’s oblivious to it, it’s still massively unfair to him. Whether he realizes or not at this point, there may come a day when he finds unflattering stories of his childhood online.
Also, those same kids who are now shunning Evan could just as easily be taunting him about his footrub fascination. Because his mom told everyone all about it.
Photos from 2014 except the one with Jenny and her son in orange, that’s from 2012. Credit: WENN.com, FameFlynet and PCNPhotos
She’s part of the problem here- she has talked about him publicly for years and is now sharing very personal details.
Bullying is terrible and most experience some form of it, but…getting hit with pipes and pies thrown in her face? Sounds more like a Three Stooges.
Except that the Three Stooges is a comedy trio, whereas being bullied is not the least bit funny. How does a child getting physically assaulted at school and the Three Stooges even remotely compare to each other?!
I think she’s saying that McCarthy’s depiction of bullying sounds cartoonish because she’s making it up and has no idea what’s realistic to say. I mean, pies? C’mon.
@Jackie Jormp Jormp & @ Kenny Boy,
I believe her. My mother is 62. She said that the kids in her day bullied and fought and made trouble with others all the time in high school. She said that some girls ganged up on the pageant winner with knives, bats, and rope and things to try and kill her. One day the teachers had to hide the girl in the closet because they were frankly trying to kill the girl in school. The bullies had no fear of the teachers, administrators, their parents, or even the dang police. The girl’s mother transferred her from that school. I asked my mother if any of the girls tried to bully and fight her. She said, “Yes, all the time.” I asked, “Well, what did your parents do?” “Nothing, she had to go to work, she said. I was so angry inside because parents need to do more for their kids. If a child puts your child’s life in danger, do something about it. What’s hard for me to believe is that people, in this day and time, with all of the killing sprees and murders and suicides that go on because of bullying, still think that McCarthy’s childhood bullying story sounds bizarre. It doesn’t.
@ Leaflet: Where did your mom go to school? Lord of the Flies High? I mean, school is brutal, but I’ve never seen a group of kids try to openly murder someone while teachers hide the girl in the closet (and don’t call the police???).
Sounds like bullshit pies, right?
Jennifer, I wasn’t saying that bullying is comedic, just that her description of it sounded a little odd and unrealistic. Jenny McCarthy isn’t exactly known for adhering strictly to the facts, so I’m wondering how truthful she’s being. Generally kids in school don’t have whole pies sitting around, you know?
I’m sorry. The topic just hits a nerve. Now I see what you’re saying. I think bullying in middle school, junior high, and high school hurt me so badly I don’t always catch the humor in things right off the bat. I get defensive.
I thought of mud pies when she said pies, but I’m not really sure if I believe her either. She does like to exaggerate.
No problem – I can understand being sensitive about it if it’s something you suffered through. It is a very serious issue (and always has been, just gets talked about more now) and I think high profile people sharing REAL experiences helps. But Jenny’s just out for attention, as always.
I agree pies to the face, getting beaten with pipes, seriously??? It just didn’t seem like stuff that really happens in high school. Sure, threatened, gossiped about, locker tricks, car damage etc. but not assaulted with a pie. Anyway, her kid is adorable and yes she should shut up about the details of his life and not talk about them on national tv for attention and public scrutiny. Can’t stand this woman.
There is no way she got beat up with pipes and pies. I really wish the interviewers of these fabulists would call them out on their BS as it happens.
Yup. I was severely bullied in high school – to the point where, as an adult at a function, one of them felt the need to come up to me and apologize -but I rolled my eyes *hard* at this. Pipes? Come on. Pie throwing? The average teen who gets his/her hand on a pie will eat it, not throw it. Even bullies
I can honestly say, my entire high school life I never saw a pie, much less one convenient for someone to throw in my face. Lol.
I would love someone to throw a pie in my face right now.
I’m sorry, I’m just really hungry.
She is unbearble. It is as if someone has poured laxatives directly into her brain. I feel so bad for her son. He looks like such a sweet kid. I dunno-I think if I had an autistic child, I would maybe try to find a summer camp where he could be with kids who were also on the autistic spectrum-who wouldn’t bully him. I really feel for him.
+1
I agree Kri. In some areas it’s hard to find other children with similar conditions, but my son is autistic and he’s going to a summer program with a small number of pupils and a therapist who works directly with him and helps him out when he wants to do something slightly different from the others. He’s really happy in a school environment and (to the very best of my knowledge) doesn’t get bullied, but I’d never send him anywhere without someone specifically in place to focus their attention on him. It costs extra, but it’s not hard to arrange and someone like Jenny could easily afford it, I think. You don’t even need a therapist necessarily, just someone who you trust with them, but it makes a difference to an autistic child to have the extra attention.
That’s apart from the fact she should absolutely not be talking about him on TV. Especially not this stuff. I think she’s using him for attention.
Agreed!! She is unbearable….she definitely needs to shut up for a minute or two……I’ve always thought she had a big mouth and it totally turned me off. Unfortunately for Donnie Wahlberg, he seems head over heels for her, but I would worry if I were him…..she probably needs to marry someone who has money now that she really has no career to speak of, but he should wait a few years until they really get to know each other a bit better. Her relationships have never lasted that long, so wait it out, Donnie……
Yes, I so agree with you and with every word CB wrote. This crazy woman needs to stop using her son to get attention for herself. It’s Munchausen-by-Proxy behavior. This poor boy is gonna have a hell of a time growing into manhood when his mother is habitually stealing his manhood. She’s so disrespectful of his privacy and his human dignity. Gah. Can’t stand it when she talks publicly about her kid!
I loathe her.
+ 1
+2
i do too. i seriously want to punch the screen every time i see her picture.
she’s making her own kid into an attention-whoring side-show. gross.
not to mention, she has said on many occasions that he does not have autism, that he was misdiagnosed (which she would have found earlier, had she not been an insane anti-vaxxer with conspiracy blinders on).
She never said he wasn’t autistic, or that he was misdiagnosed. That was a rumor that she denied. There are plenty of links if you google it, but here’s one for you.
‘
http://www.eonline.com/news/495860/jenny-mccarthy-slams-rumor-that-her-son-evan-was-misdiagnosed-with-autism-it-s-irresponsible-and-inaccurate
I’m with you there. Lots of reasons, and this latest isn’t helping.
That’s what I was going to say. I thought his autism was misdiagnosed and it was some food allergy problem that were causing behavior issues.
Also, why does the excerpt say his name is “Asher?” I thought his name was Evan (as stated earlier).
Morticians – his dad’s last name ( and maybe his) is Asher so that’s likely the cause of the mistake
I hate to admit it, but me too. Put your kid first for once, woman!
@torontoe, ah! Thank you. I actually like Asher as a first name.
Why would you allow your child to stay in a camp where he is being bullied? WHY??? What on earth happened to advocating for your child and not embarrassing him? This is an awful story. BUT – if she was truly bullied in school the way she says she was…why didn’t her own parents pull her out? UGH!!!!!!!!!!
I was bullied in school both by other students and the teachers. My parents didn’t believe me until we talked about after I became an adult. They thought I was being dramatic or something. Just part of their neglect and abuse of me. Perhaps she had abusive parents as well.
I am with you why make him stay? I have already decided my kid will be removed from school if she is bullied. I sometimes think kids these days need to grow a pair, but kids are worse at bullying these days. Or kids could be more sensitive these days.
I think if my kid is bullied I might go beat up the other kids mother. Does that make me a bully or does it make me a trashy idiot? These are the questions I ponder.
+1
I’m guessing your child isn’t school age yet. Let me tell you kids today are much different than they were once. They will flat out start taunting another child right in front of the parents, whereas in the past if another kids parents were around they wouldn’t dare do such a thing. They are meaner, and with social media (something to worry about down the road) they take their bullying to a whole new level. If there are fights, (in the older grades) they whip out their phones to film it for You Tube.
Yes some kids need to be taught to stand up for themselves more, but many need to be taught how to behave, have limits set and learn respect for their elders and their peers. I have two kids one is grown and one is 10 (he has ADD & Aspergers) and believe me the natural instinct is to protect your child, and yes there has been a bully or two I wish I could have pummeled myself. Doesn’t make you a trashy idiot at all, it makes you a mom wanting to protect your child. Alas though some of those kids may well deserve a good kick in the rear, you can’t do that obviously. Always bring it to the school’s attention, make the parent teacher co-ordinator a friend, and be an advocate for your daughter. School’s sometimes can have a way of wanting to ignore or hush up situations really quick. Speak up when you feel you need to and don’t be intimidated. As someone told me if they cringe when they see you walking in you, know you’re doing your job. Too many parents unfortunately don’t get involved and don’t say anything. The only other thing I can say is teach her to not instigate situations, but if someone is being mean or aggressive to her, she has a right to stand up for herself.
Makes you trashy. In your scenario, your kid is being bullied so you set the example by beating up the mother of the bully? That right there is part of the problem. It starts w/the parents. I had a student whose mother drove her daughter to the site where her daughter was going to meet some girls to fight only to have the mother participate & according to witnesses, the mother got a beat down as well. It was the talk of the school for a few days.
It starts w/the parents & unfortunately, too many parents think it the school & the villages job to raise their child. It’s not, it is your job.
Maybe it’s not that bad and maybe she wants him to learn to deal with it because, you know, it’s real life. I don’t like her for the things she shares about her child, but I am really against the whole parenting style of “oh, it’s a little uncomfortable for my special snowflake, let’s swoop in and solve their problems for them.” If he is in danger (pipes? Yikes!), then that is one thing. But if it’s kids not sitting with him at lunch? Better to learn to deal with it than have mommy solve your problems all of the time.
@JMHO, I agree with you. Kids should be taught how to deal with bullies, not rescued every time they’re teased. My parents did a lot of things wrong, but the one thing I thank them for in enrolling me in karate because it gave me the confidence to stand up for myself. Plus, once I kicked a few behinds, I was given respect. Also everyone is bullied at one time or another… for being too thin or too fat, too short or too tall, too smart or too dumb etc. if you aren’t a lemming, you are singled out. Kids shun those who are unique, but adults celebrate it. Those kids who are being bullied will be well received some day.
I agree with this. I was “actually” bullied-beaten up, threatened nearly every day for all of 7th grade, sexual harrassment/touching starting at ten when I developed boobs, stealing of my stuff, etc.-and let me tell you something, all that did was teach me to stand up for myself and never take sh8t from anyone.
So, yes, when I was a kid and I was in it, it sucked, but later on down the line, I found that I had a lot more confidence than my peers and it taught me to always speak up against bullsh8t. If my parents had attempted to protect me, I might not be the person I am today.
Some parents handle it differently. I was bullied, and my parents knew and told me to deal with it myself. So I did, and I think I am stronger and better for the experience. It was terrible at the time but I learned how to deal with problems without running from them. I am going to put my kids in martial arts and teach them how to fight, so they can hopefully handle some of these inevitable issues themselves. Another thing that I think (hope) will help them is there are 3 of them (so far) and all close in age, so they can back each other up. The reality of life is that it’s a struggle and it won’t always be nice, kind or treat you well, so the sooner you learn how to stand up for yourself and fight back, the better off you’ll be.
@astra, I enrolled my eldest in tang soo do at 4. He is almost 6 and a getting ready to test for his brown belt. He wanted to enter a tournament last year at 5 and they put him up against a 7 year old that was 6 inches taller and 20 lbs heavier. He lost (and that kid went on to win the trophy for the 5-7 age group), but I was so proud of him for standing and fighting. He was confident and not intimidated. Some of the other kids that fought him (in later rounds) actually ran away from him. Martial arts definitely builds confidence. One of the best choices I’ve made for my son.
Is his name Evan or Asher?
Also, didn’t she claim that she “cured” him of autism some years back, or am I thinking of some other self-important know it all celeb?
That’s what I was thinking, too. Isn’t he supposed to be “cured” by diet or something? Not to snark on the poor kid, but…
i’ve read that she’s said that he was misdiagnosed, and never had autism to begin with.
Which is absolutely shocking considering that everyone with a functioning brain has been telling her that since the very day she started sprouting her bullshit about autism! You do not heal from autism, there is no cure, at least for now! If you are lucky, you get comportamental/medical therapy and you can control it, but you do not heal! Doesn’ t mean that your life is over anyway!
And no, SamiHami, you’ re not wrong, she really said something on the line of “My love and an adequate diet cured my kid from autism!”… yeah!
she did say cured him, and that he was misdiagnosed, and he has it.
she is a flaky moron.
His name is Evan Asher
What Mel M and TorontoE (upthread) have said: Evan’s last name is Asher. (His father is Jenny’s ex-husband, John Asher; John was adopted by his mother’s third husband, director/producer William Asher.)
Came here to ask this. I thought his diet was her miracle “cure”. 😛
Girls holding pipes in front of her house? She is acting like she grew up on the south side in some ghetto hood area.
She really needs to just shut up already.
Yes, you’re correct. She should not talk about it and she should hold the pain inside and not share her experiences. You’re right. She should just shut up; because after all; look at the damage she is doing by reaching out to others who may be able to relate to what she’s gone through. Shame on her for trying to heal herself and others… Psh
Hadley, bullying can happen in any neighborhood. It is very possible that Jenny is telling the truth. Also, I grew up a shy, nerdy kid in what one might call a “ghetto hood area.” I was never bullied.
True. She could of been bullied in any area but the ” with pipes” was extreme and I some how doubt it was that extreme violence. Probably more with words than anything and that can happen any where.
She just tries to come off like she was in the super rough Chicago neighborhood and had to survive drive by shootings …. I grew up near her area and while no city is safe she wasn’t in danger on a daily basis like those on the south side where people actually ARE shot on a daily basis and you are scared to even leave your house after 5pm.
I agree. Let’s not pretend that violence is limited only to certain neighborhoods. Kids DO severely beat each other in suburbs, rural areas, etc.
Doesn’t matter. I went to one of the top 3 public school systems in the country, in one of the richest and most affluent areas in the country, and I carried a knife to school every day (and carry more than just that knife as an adult). You never knew what could happen, I was threatened many times and saw many serious, dangerous fights with weapons. It’s not just a certain area that has these issues. If I had needed to, I never would’ve hesitated to stab someone because you never knew what they had and what they would do to you. There is nowhere that is “safe”, don’t fool yourself into thinking that. Better kids learn the realities of life and how to protect themselves as early as possible than go through life thinking everything is OK, and then become a victim.
The answer to any question involving Jenny McCarthy is always ‘she should shut up’.
And what’s up with her own weird bullying stories? Who was bullying her, that notorious gang, The Keystone Kops?
Those bastards!
Here is what I blame Jenny for, opening her trap and discussing her son and the sex talk openly and always trying to be cool and edgy for attention.
I am sure celeb kids get bullied over being who they are. Sad that it happens. I was “bullied” throughout grade and most of high school. I basically ignored it and that took away the power from the aholes and as quickly as the bullying would start up through different periods it would stop because I took the power to hurt away from them. I think if Asher is unaware maybe it should stay that way.
I often wonder how the mommy blogging business has blown up to be such a lucrative industry when I read these stories and comments. The things celebrities get trashed for is the bread and butter of parenting blogs. Pics of nude or barely-dressed kids, ridiculous amounts of oversharing, etc. Granted, they are not celebrities, but some of these people have thousands of readers, speak at conferences in front of thousands, have books out. There’s still an impact for these kids in their neighborhoods or schools. It seems like out in the real world this kind of thing doesn’t get much backlash.
Cough *KelleHampton* cough 🙂
i’m sure sharing these kind of infirmations with the world is really going to help his son and the bullying matter.
She has one of those rare forms of verbal diarrhea and she never knows when it’s time to STFU.
Jenny, just stop talking! Evan will probably thank you. If there is a problem with the camp, deal with the camp in a way that will not embarrass your child.
Good Gawd, woman, be quiet. Seriously. Stop talking about your son. He deserves privacy even if you don’t value it.
I feel so bad for her son. She’s used him as fuel for her career for pretty much his entire life. She used his autism to sow misinformation about vaccines, which has helped to put innumerable people at risk for entirely curable diseases. Now she’s putting his most intimate questions and experiences out into the world for strangers to judge. Ugh.
If you are a parent or family member of an autistic child you understand this. Depending on where he falls on the spectrum. My nephew is autistic. He is 6. Very smart; reading on a 3rd grade level. But he struggles with social issues and was being avoided by a boy at school; I hesitate on it being call bullying. He and the boy had been BFFs for the first few years when they were 4/5. When they started Kindergarten the boy wanted to distance himself. My nephew didn’t understand. And with his affects it is hard to really explain to him that some times people may not want to play with you.
I don’t have a problem with her sharing that. There are so many parents/families trying to navigate through this. Children with autism have to learn or be exposed to different situations for them to learn those social interactions. It’s a hard call. I think maybe her sharing can begin a dialogue.
This! He’s the victim of the bullying. Those kids and the parents that raised him should be ashamed and altering their behavior.
Just because a child doesn’t want to be friends with another child it is not bullying. It may hurt someone’s feelings, but we really need to let hurt happen to children. Even if they are autistic they need to learn and feel the hurt just like others. I appreciate that it is harder to explain, but it doesn’t change the fact they children need to learn how to deal with it provided the behavior is not demeaning and abusive.
Also, keep in mind that even the child that may be ignoring the other child is just a child too, and may not be perfect at social interactions either. If a parent is going to be ashamed every time their child makes a mistake socially or otherwise, I hope they have a lot of money for therapy, because it will happen and if it doesn’t the parent isn’t paying attention. I have noticed with the bullies I have seen in the tween age group generally the parents are oblivious or they are adult bullies themselves. Every once in a while you get someone who will address it , but rarely. I think it has been this way for a while.
For Jenny her kid is a tween she need to STFU! If her son really doesn’t understand the social cues he is probably better off, because I know my daughter who is his age would die from embarrassment. I am lucky when I get to walk with her when we are shopping if some of her school friends are around.
+1
thank you for posting this.
one of the first things we noticed about the school system was the “everyone is friends” policy. it’s unrealistic and sets up children to fail socially. Not everyone IS your friend. some people you don’t get along with, some you want as friends and they do not want to be yours. also, the definition of friends varies from person to person, even for little kids.
Instead, we chose to tell our daughter that she had to remember her manners with people, be polite- the “public” face adults learn to use. we then helped her learn who she got along with to then build a friendship with.
I don’t know if it’s better or worse, but it is working so far.
and yes, parents need to be aware of how their children interact with others, not just how others interact with their kids.
Yes, this all strikes a nerve.When my son was younger he was diagnosed with ADHD–head no impulse control and would do whatever–and some OCD tendencies (he went through a phase where he wouldn’t take off his coat in school no matter what for instance). He had trouble with social interactions and was tested for autism. He rated low on that spectrum so he wasn’t diagnosed as autistic. But every day I just felt was a battle emotionally. Kids ignored him at school–not because they were mean or bullies but because they were kids and he was difficult to deal with through no fault of his own. We wemt through the ‘no one will sit with me at lunch’ thing to. But I shed a lot of tears over it throughout the years. Prayers, therapy and nutritional/vitamin changes over more than a decade–as well as just aging out of the worst of the ADHD behaviors and learning to deal–have wrought a lot of changes and he does a lot better with people and social situations. I feel for them in this instance because no mother wants their kid to suffer but you aren’t doing him any favors by yammering on about it publicly!
@ Kori, I can relate to what you said here. I’m curious as to what vitamin/nutritional changes you made. We have our Asperger/ADD son in therapy now. I have read that magnesium, zinc and vitamin B6 can play a big roll in helping. I tried some vitamin drops a few years ago, but saw no change. There is product online called On Task Naturally, and on their site there are links to many studies about the calming effects vitamins can have. I will not medicate him and want to find a natural remedy. I too have and continue to say my own prayers, and hope that the combination of therapy, us teaching and helping him learn social cues, and eventually aging will make a difference.
@Nicolette Magnesium was the biggest change we made. I also tried to limit his processed foods/high fructose intakes (not easy with a teenage boy). I don’t know if the latter helped but it certainly couldn’t hurt anyone’s overall health. I noticed a big change when I started giving him chewable magnesium tables, a multivitamin and B-complex–magnesium probably being the most noticeable helpful. I had read once that a lot of ADHD kids had low magnesium levels. A lot of natural ADHD medicines are a mix of magnesium and various other supplements/vitamins too. He was on medication (because his complete lack of impulse control had reached a dangerous level which resulted in a broken leg and almost a fatal accident) until he finished middle school. Medication wasn’t a decision I made lightly–and everyone’s beliefs and circumstances are different. I had him tested by 2 different doctors (one a therapist, one a psychiatrist) and my husband and I as well as his teachers each answered a 250 question diagnostic form. As I said, he tested low on the autism spectrum but a lot of his behaviors resembled Asperger’s. By the time he finished middle school, I felt he was old enough and mature enough to really understand some of the behavioral tricks he’d learned in therapy and use them on his own without any medicine. He went into high school after being off his meds all summer and did great–straight As, more relaxed personality. He’s still a big of a ‘spazz’ (as was his father back in the day only that’s what they called, or ‘hyper’, instead of ADHD). High school was the turning point for us because of his age and also if he wanted to follow his Dad into the military (he may not but I wanted him to have the option), you have to get a waiver if you are on ADHD meds and, in a drawdown period, that would be harder to get.We have PCSed to Europe for my hubby’s assignment and he assimilated in with no problem making friends. We still use our code, based on Up, when he starts rambling on, jumping around or interrupting. I just look at him and say ‘Squirrel’. LOL He laughs and knows that he needs to reign it in and work on some control. I think the vitamins have also helped with the OCD tendencies–he was never Monk but he did have some real tics. Some other things that helped were putting him karate–helped with focus–and later with wrestling. ADHD kids do well with sports it’s just certain one benefit them more. Wrestling is a team sport but it’s an individual one as well so it, like martial arts, are good for them. He was great at baseball as a kid–hit well and ran like the devil–but put him in the outfield and the attention span just went *poof*. So those kind of sports didn’t work. He’s been in Scouts since he was a Cub Scout and organized groups like those work well too–it forces the interaction with peers but it’s more controlled in that there isn’t the bullying and ostracizing that can occur in school. And it helped him with responsibility and organization. It’s still a battle but not the everyday worry that it was so keep hanging in there–it does get better to steal the phrase. I know some people pooh-pooh the ADHD thing but they did other conditions once before too. It’s not just a matter of discipline–I spent roughly a decade on him every day between researching, taking him to therapy, consulting with his teachers, dealing with his medication and just *worrying* every damn day that he would be friendless, ostracized, a problem at school, not appreciated for the wonderful and intelligent boy he is. I still worry but it’s not the constant we lived with for so long I can see each day becoming easier. He’s going into his junior year now as a straight A student, well liked by his classmates and teachers, on the path to Eagle Scout, in JROTC and going out for sports.
@lisa2 +1,000!! I am a parent of a child on the spectrum and yes I most certainly understand this. My son is 10, has a high functioning form of Asperger’s and is also very intelligent. Social issues as you said are a struggle, and only in the past year during 5th grade did he really start to make friends in class. There was another boy who had been in the same class with him from 2nd through 4th grade, and that kid just made it his mission to make my son miserable. If my son was making friends, this little creep would try to stop those boys from speaking to my son. He tried to sneak up behind my son and hit him in the head with his book bag because my son had the nerve to be speaking to one of them. I saw this and was ready to pounce but the kid stopped before doing anything. He tried to start with my son at a birthday party they both attended and his mother did nothing. I went over and reprimanded him, and told him to leave my son alone. Thankfully they are not in the same class anymore.
It is hard trying to explain to kids on the spectrum about bullying. They don’t read people and situations quite the same way, and it’s an ongoing struggle. I’m always telling him not be the aggressor but yet to know when enough is enough and stand up for himself, which he hesitates to do at school because he doesn’t want to get in trouble. I tell him I always will come up to the school and fight for his rights. Kids know how to push his buttons, and I try to teach him to ignore things to a point as long as no one lays a hand on him, then it’s another story and his father and I will go up to school. Two years ago we had to see the principal when a couple of boys were saying to him that they were going to come to our house, throw him in the bathtub, hit him in the head with a bat and kill him. Yes, in 4th grade!! Those boys were suspended and made to apologize. Our principal likes to say it’s an anti-bully school, but the parents know that’s a lot of BS. She just tries to downplay incidents to make herself look good, but that’s another story and I’m way off topic.
Having a kid on the spectrum poses many challenges that people don’t even realize on a day to day basis. If you’re not living it you really don’t understand it. And trying to teach a child how to read others and their emotions is difficult at best. That component is missing many times and it becomes something to teach over and over again. But you keep going because you want them to have that ability when they are grown. People are mean whether they are kids or fully grown (sometimes the adults can act worse than the kids) and it’s about teaching him when to let things go and when to take a stand. Just one of the many obstacles to face on the spectrum.
To me there’s no deference between her and the bullies.
Say something nice: to be fair, it is extremely likely that Jenny McCarthy is ASD herself. Reasons for saying this: autism is more and more being identified as a genetic disorder – plus my sister’s husband is a doctor who says that most of the parents of autistic children he sees would themselves have been diagnosed as ASD or autistic when they were kids, only that 30 and 40 years ago only the most severe cases were diagnosed. Also Jenny McCarthy’s past behaviors have been fairly autistic – eating her own vomit on live television, for example.
So I’m willing to cut her a bit of slack on this one, and say that JM actually has no idea of the embarassment and potential harm that she is opening up her son to by publicly saying these things.
Really? I know several parents of autistic children, and none of them fit that description at all.
“eating her own vomit on live television, for example.” Um-say what? Please tell me that’s a euphemism for something else. Even she’s not that vile…is she?
she is a terrible parent.
why does he need to make as a any friends as possible? sex is like foot rubs? she gives terrible advice and guidance.
why is she telling everyone private details about him?
she uses her own son and it is shameful. he has to be associated with her through no fault of his own but for her to use him the way she does is completely unfair to him.
She is such a jacka$$.
That about covers it, really.
As someone who grew up near where she’s originally from, I know countless people who do not like her. Basically, she taunted a LOT of people herself & got as good as she gave. Definitely shouldn’t have been beaten up however. Not advocating violence.
As for why her parents wouldn’t switch schools, particularly in hs, well the mindset has changed somewhat as the schools have improved, but she grew up on the south side of chicago/ south suburbs. For many years the mindset has been send your kid to private school bc the public schools suck. She also went to an all-girls hs. Some of the same sex schools have since gone co-ed, but back then I’m guessing it was a matter of location & cost.
jenny shut your pie hole. I had a friend from 3rd grade to 12th that was bullied though we just called it being picked on back then. She was obnoxious could never shut her mouth was opinionated & she is still this way as an adult. She moved away & once in a while comes home to visit family & friends which includes me. She told me on a visit as we discussed how things were then & are now that she owned her part of all things that happened growing up because of her mouth. She brought on some but not all of her grief from our classmates.
I guess my point is some people really need to learn to shut it. Jenny reminds me of my friend I truly think like my friend she may have played her own part in her growing up years. I don’t buy her just finding her voice as an adult & being some quiet shy pretty girl all in school. She is doing her son no favors with her big mouth. Jenny I got your number…
My autistic son attended a summer care program just for kids on the spectrum. Be an advocate for your kid, Jenny.
my son was diagnosed w/autism nine years ago when he was 5. I have sometimes thought that I exhibit some autistic traits myself, but I would never, ever say some of the things that she’s said to my friends, let alone the entire nation. I told my son early on about his autism. It is not a secret in our house, to our friends or family. He realizes he’s different and embraces it. Bullying is everywhere and can happen to anyone. I’ve always taught him to be a friend to everyone and ignore the kids who aren’t worth his time. So far, it’s working for him. I don’t think he’s experienced anything severe, but middle school isn’t roses for anyone. He is who he is and I think that as long as people appreciate their kids for who they are and teach their kids to do the same, that builds confidence more than anything. I wouldn’t change him for the world.
I speak as someone who had an autistic schoolmate: if the other children do not receive the right support, autistic children can be very scaring. My schoolmate had these “attacks” and he started throwing things to everyone when he did not get the attention. Luckily he (and us) shared a teacher who explained how we were supposed to behave with him.
If he is in a camp which do not have this kind of support I can see why other children do not want to be friend with him, I think she should have chosen a place who give children the right support, and if she wants to talk about this, she could choose to be an advocate for this cause, to inform people about autism and the difficult of a person in the spectrum, instead of telling everyone about intimate details of her son’s life.
Ten to one she’ll be bitching about her privacy within six months.
That poor boy!
To answer the original question, “should she shut up?”, if the she in question is McCarthy, the answer is always a resounding YES!!!
We are saying that Evan deserves respect and privacy. Maybe pictures of Evan should no longer be posted on this site.
Let’s see if I have this correct: this woman has openly discussed her breast implants, posed naked for Playboy, and overshares every aspect of her tween’s life, but danced around the sex discussion by explaining that sex is like “foot rubs”? Honey, don’t walk the walk if you can’t even talk the talk.
I thought the same thing. Why on earth would you explain to your child that sex is like footrubs? I also think that all the pictures of footrubs are possibly an exaggeration. This woman is not bright. Kids deserve honesty, not some made-up explanation.
She should focus on protecting her son, especially since autistic children are in a very vulnerable position, but as I see it, a huge responsibility lies with the parents of bullies and teachers because the parent of an autistic child can only do so much if they don’t have the support and cooperation of other ADULTS. No child should be bullied, ever. When I read about bullied children committing suicide I am absolutely horrified, as many people are.
Ok, this has nothing to do with the point of the post, but oh my goodness, he is the CUTEST thing! I love those glasses on him. Again, I know not the point, but I had to say it, he’s adorable!
I understand why she may have wanted try allowing her autistic son to go to a summer cap with other kids. I believe she may have done this so that he could be around average kids without disabilities so that he could maybe grow and develop in ways that are more natural and easy to kids his own age. My sister has a daughter with Down syndrome. The special needs child also has a twin and other siblings that are thankfully not special needs. The child with special needs is a lot more developed mentally and socially than a lot of her special needs peers because she has siblings that she can learn and grow from. Sometimes children learn from others better than they would learn from an adult. However, if I were Jesse , I’d just remove my kid from the camp because the children’s mannerisms are unhealthy towards her child. I don’t mind Jesse speaking on it because these are real issues.
I understand that JM is usually a pain in the neck and her son deserves his privacy but the way that she framed the question, it sounded like a legitimate concern for her. Maybe she thought that if she brought it up on the show, other parents of autistic kids who had been in a similar situation would respond to the show and give her advice. (I can’t believe I’m defending her.)
Yes, she should be quiet. Her kid didn’t sign up to be her inspiration for interview topics. She’s an awful mother on that account.
As someone on the spectrum I certainly feel for her son. I hope he is one day able to grow into a stronger person despite all that he’s going through at the hands of his insensitive mother.