On a scale of ‘Donald Trump’ to ‘Dorito’, how orange is Pippa Middleton?

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I really do have some residual affection for Pippa Middleton. I think out of all the Middleton children, she’s probably the brightest and most outgoing, although that’s setting the bar pretty low. Think of it this way… in 2016, Pippa has officially done more charity work than her duchess sister. Seriously. Pippa attended last night’s Roll Out the Red fundraiser in London. The event raised money for the British Heart Foundation, which is one of Pippa’s non-royal patronages, and a charity which receives more free publicity from Pippa than any of Kate’s charities receive from Kate. So, on that count, I have no shade for Pippa. She actually believes in “giving back” in significant ways.

Now, all that being said… WHY IS PIPPA SO ORANGE? My God. She’s an outdoorswoman, always skiing and hiking and biking, so part of it is a real tan that comes from not wearing the appropriate amount of sunscreen during outdoor activities. But I’m almost positive that Pippa either gets spray tans or she’s a tanning bed addict. There’s absolutely no reason for her to be this orange.

Pippa’s dress was Tabitha Webb. I kind of think this is cute? Pippa’s style is usually more lacking than Kate’s, but this is a decent enough look. Other women at the event wore full-length gowns and the men were mostly in black-tie, so there’s a chance Pippa was a tad underdressed. That’s a consistent problem with the sisters too – misjudging the dress code for events. Kate will wear cocktail dresses in the middle of the day and simple, day-time frocks to evening galas, and it seems like Pippa has the same problem. As you can see, Pippa accessorize with matchy-matchy red shoes and a red, heart-shaped clutch.

I haven’t seen any recent updates on the situation between Pippa and James Matthews. I assume they’re still happening, although it’s possible he was scared off by Team Middleton’s hard-sell in the British press.

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Photos courtesy of WENN.

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112 Responses to “On a scale of ‘Donald Trump’ to ‘Dorito’, how orange is Pippa Middleton?”

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  1. Belle says:

    God Damn! Do these people have mirrors?

    • Anne tommy says:

      I’m sorry I can’t provide a Link to the song “Orange (like an Orange)” by the great Irish comedian David O’ Doherty, where he compares an orange lady to among other things Garfield, Fanta, Tonka Trucks and the Oompa Loopas. Well worth a Google. 🍊

    • mp says:

      I wonder if she’s got a skin condition like vitiligo or something where her skin has white spots and doesn’t tan evenly and so going orange is the only way to make all of her skin the same color?

      • anne_000 says:

        In DM photos, she has dark spots under that orange.

      • Mieke says:

        That’s not how vitiligo works. The lighter parts lack melanin. No tanning will change that. It’s ver important to keep these spots out of the sun. Covering it up with makeup won’t work either.

      • qwerty says:

        Saw her make up free pics from some marathon. No, she just has terrible, terrible sun damage.

    • nleslqqwwq says:

      Why would anyone be Tropicana orange in the middle of a British winter?

      • LAK says:

        Pippa likes being orange. As the royal forums nicknamed Kate Waity, so they nicknamed Pippa Orangina for her tango’d complexion.

        If you look through pics of her going back to University days, she’s always been a strange shade of day glo orange.

        She was toned down for the royal wedding, but soon reverted to her preference.

        That said, this shade is too much, even for her.

      • Bridget says:

        @LAK: Don’t forget, that was also the look at that point in time. Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan et al were orange skinned and bleached hair. Obviously, not the style inspiration of the landed class (how gauche!) but just pointing it out.

    • OrangeCrush says:

      Also, she has ’90s prom hair. Ringlets? Come on.

    • Gina says:

      +1

      “Orange?” She’s magenta.

    • Anne tommy says:

      Wrong place but thanks for the link Olenna

  2. NewWester says:

    Tropicana Orange

  3. Zapp Brannigan says:

    Cooked Lobster Chic, poor #pippatips

  4. CidySmiley says:

    She looks uncomfortable. I mean, Kate always looks uncomfortable and Pippa usually doesnt. But she’s looking a little stiff in these pics, more Kate like.

  5. Nancy says:

    Tangerello. Tone it down there Pippie Longstockings…

  6. Patricia says:

    How on earth is getting dressed up and attending an event where you are fed and given drinks and most likely entertained considered “work”?! Damn I want that job.

    Oompa- loompa orange, anyway.

  7. kitty nom nom says:

    I think that’s the colour you turn right before you have a heart attack, maybe she’s trying to show some solidarity?

  8. Betti says:

    Judging by the fact that her scalp is a similar colour to her face i’d say that the base is from making the most of the new beau’s Barbados connections with a very light spray top up (thou saying that there are no tell tale signs on her feet). She still looks like she’s been tango’d.

    Pips need to teach her sister how to hustle for the patronages

  9. minx says:

    She’s Boehner-esque.
    Has no one taken her aside to talk about sunscreen? She’s ruining her skin.

  10. lucy2 says:

    She’s gone full Dorito.

  11. Dana says:

    Flaming Hot Cheetos, not Doritos; she’s almost red.

  12. Eleonor says:

    The dress might not be right for the event, but I really really like it, and I cannot shade her for her charity work. THE QUEEN should think to give her one of her pratonages.
    I like the heart shaped purse, really nice for the Heart fundation.

    • Imqrious2 says:

      I read the purse was an “on purpose” choice, and was going to be auctioned off for the charity.

  13. Darkladi says:

    Hot Cheetos

  14. ell says:

    that can’t be her real colour can it? it must be the picture. no one is that colour.

  15. InvaderTak says:

    That kinda looks like a 3 alarm sunburn to me.

  16. SydneySnider says:

    I’ve got three brown hens that are lighter than Pippa. I do hope she’s not using tanning beds – they are so dangerous, and are banned in most Australian states (in salons) after the publicity the late Claire Oliver generated before and after her death from skin cancer. I used to get manicures using gel polish with the lamp, but stopped immediately after reports that these lamps can also cause skin cancer, since they’re like tanning beds. I now use Revlon gel polish that doesn’t require the lamp to set the lacquer.

    I quite like Pippa’s dress, but the bag and shoes are a bit much.

  17. Savina says:

    She and Tony the Tiger look like long lost brother sister.

  18. choco says:

    Because orange is the new black.

    • anne_000 says:

      😀

      In photos on DM, there’s black spots on her skin underneath that orange. I guess they might be freckles, but they’re dark and larger than just sprinkles. I wonder if the orange is to cover up for the dark spots. But she could have used some concealer instead of spray tan though.

      • Bridget says:

        I agree – I think she tries to even out her skin tone and hide tan lines by spray tanning I stead of using makeup. Not necessarily the choice I’d make…

  19. mellie says:

    Love the dress, she’s starting to tread towards the Ross Geller tanning bed episode of friends…

  20. AlmondJoy says:

    *cringe* I think she’s past Dorito… Looks more like those Flavor Blasted Goldfish that I buy for my students.

    • I Choose Me says:

      Ha. And the most interesting thing I take away from this is that you’re a teacher Almond Joy. What grade level if I may ask?

    • Kitten says:

      YES, woman! Flavor-blasted cheddar cheese Goldfish are my shit.

      ….because I’m five, apparently.

      *hides Hawaiian punch juicebox behind back*

    • AlmondJoy says:

      Hey, I Choose Me and Kitten! Happy Friday lovelies 😘

      I’m the Director of a private owned before and after school extended learning program at an elementary school. So I have K-5 and it’s pretty awesome. Love my job!

      Kitten, the flavor blasted fishies are toooo good! I can eat a whole box 😩 Now Hawaiian Punch.. I swear I haven’t seen those in years! But I usually keep a Capri Sun on hand lol

  21. Margo S. says:

    I have to say. As a Canadian who doesn’t get the whole British royalty thing, why are these Middletons so basic looking? I expect some next level hollywood princess looks but all I get is… this….? Even kate has the worst bags under her eyes. Are their makeup artists just crap? I expect more from “royalty” or whatever pippa is. Not a “night out in Liverpool” look.

  22. Jaded says:

    OK, she’s achieved the colour of a pretzel basted in ketchup now. That’s just so low-classy.

  23. HH says:

    “Pippa’s style is usually more lacking than Kate’s” >>> Really? I consider it the opposite. Kate may have more “hits” than “misses” because she recycles looks. I don’t mean just the clothes themselves, but the styling and cuts. Pippa reminds me of the York girls in that she takes more risks which may not work out, but that earns more points for me.

  24. Sarah01 says:

    She looks awful, tone it down seriously. This whole family is like the British version of Kardashians. Both the mothers are cut from the same cloth.

  25. HK9 says:

    So, is there anything you can do once you’ve unintentionally turned “Tropicana” orange?? Is there a product for that or do you just have to hide out at home?

  26. AntiSocialButterfly says:

    Tang-dusted baked sweet potato.

  27. I Choose Me says:

    I think the scale goes Donald, John Boehner, Doritos then Oompa loompa. I think she’s almost in Oompa loompa territory.

  28. Whatabout says:

    Looks like she’s wearing one of those gold Cartier love bracelets.
    I’ve had this theory that Pippa got involved in all these endurance races because that’s what her now boyfriend was into. Like she’s that friend who mets a guy and slowly morphs herself into someone who loves everything they do.

    • Bridget says:

      She’s been doing these events for a long while now, though. And her most frequent partner is her brother.

      And honestly, as an endurance athlete myself, I can tell you this: the level of motivation and dedication needed for the things she’s been doing far outstrips ‘doing it for a guy’. Training is a GRIND, even in the best of circumstances when you’re not balancing a full time job or children (a la Pippa).

  29. Jaana says:

    Wow. It’s almost like she is trying to be another ethnicity or something.

  30. Adrien says:

    It’s actually a good look on her.

  31. Cee says:

    Dear Pippa, hire a stylist. You are good looking but you dress and style yourself so badly. Less orange, less eye liner, more hair styles and better clothes.

    I find it funny that both Middleton sisters do not understand dress codes.

    • Betti says:

      Neither does Ma Middleton – both girls style themselves on their mother and they wear their makeup like her as well. Carole wears her eyeliner like that – its an 70s/80s thing.

      They both are in desperate need of professional style, hair and makeup help. They all have limp hair that just hangs there, add some layers FFS!

  32. Cricket says:

    could it be a mustique tan? weren’t the Midds in their fav holiday spot for mumsie Carole’s birthday?

  33. Kitten says:

    It’s just not a modern look. Tans are not cool anymore, natural skin tone is where it’s at.

  34. Bejkie says:

    I reckon she’s more on the Trump side of the scale, due to hue. More like a deep Tandoori than a bright nuclear Dorito. Neither option is human shade.

  35. mazzie says:

    Thing is, I like the dress. I wouldn’t style it that way but it’s a nice dress. Too bad it’s probably stained with tanner.

    • anne_000 says:

      That’s what I was thinking too. Under the hot lights and the stress of giving a speech, I’m thinking she sweated off some of that orange dye. Not a good idea to wear white when you’ve put on a lot of spray tan.

  36. Olenna says:

    I love ragging on Pippa, but all I can do right now is laugh at the headline and some of these comments. Shame on all of you (LOL)!

  37. QQ says:

    Burnished Gold Boehner 5 out of 5 Boehners she almost matches her shoes

  38. Tourmaline says:

    I’ve seen pics of her face sans makeup after one of her sporting events– she has shocking amounts of sun damage to her face. It seriously looks like one of those special photo aging pictures a dermatologist uses to illustrate hidden UV damage.

    • Christin says:

      At her age, that is not good. Seriously.

    • Susan says:

      My sentiments exactly. In fact if you zoom in on her arms, legs and face in these pics you can see the damage. She’s so young to have such damaged, aged skin….I just can’t comprehend. I can’t comprehend that she doesn’t see what she is doing/has done.

    • I think she’s gotten some fillers since we saw her last. Her cheeks are looking rather rounded and full, and her lips look fuller..particularly the upper lip. That photo where she is licking her lips…people who get lip fillers often do that because they are still adjusting to having fish lips.

  39. anne_000 says:

    She did a live speech at the event, so that’s one more thing she’s done than Kate has this year. I think she usually does more live speeches on whole than Kate does.

    I don’t think she’s there just to give back. I think she love the media attention more than just doing ‘good works.’

    I think the dry cleaner is going to have a hard time with the orange stains and with the MIddletons probably demanding that the services be done for free.

    • wolfie says:

      Kate struggles with her new “posh” accent and seems very self-conscious about it – I wonder if Pippa and the rest of the Middleton clan are attempting to change their accents in order to have aristocratic pronunciation as well. Perhaps they practice together…

  40. kri says:

    She is the color of paprika. Honestly, I think it has to an awful tanner/bronzer. If you shook her hand and then touched your eyes, they’d start burning. It’s like she vacationed on the sun.

  41. zinjojo says:

    You guys are killing me with your descriptions!

    She matches the red in the backdrop, not a good look. And I like the dress but hate the styling. Pippa, like her sister, goes for the obvious “theme” look with the red heart bag.

  42. blueberry says:

    Awww, Pippa no! Didn’t one of the other Brit celeb boys have an “orange” phase? Can’t remember if it was Cumbers or Hiddles, but I distinctly remember some orange happening. I think Pippa went too far with the bronzer… but wow. Yeah. whatever it is, it isn’t natural. I would think. Right? I mean… that can’t be achieved through natural means?

  43. Sam says:

    I’m of indian heritage and have no one in my family that colour!

    Both sisters seem to love a deep tan but wow- way too orange.

  44. MinnFinn says:

    Doritos

    Pippa is a paid contractual spokeswoman for the BHF so I fail to see how she’s giving back.

    Such a deep tan on someone who is a role model for good health is not good. The counter argument would be but this is heart health, not skin. Doesn’t matter. And even if one or all of the tans she has throughout a given year are 100% spray-on, suntan on any health campaign ambassador is just wrong.

  45. suze says:

    The Middleton women all tan darkly naturally, so I have to think she is trying to extend her tan from the last vacay a month or so ago. She shouldn’t, really. The Middleton orange is such a desperate look.

  46. notasugarhere says:

    Just back from a secret tropical vacation with her sister orange?

  47. Abbess Tansy says:

    Oh my lamb, she almost matches her purse. Talk about accessorizing.

  48. Pants says:

    I think the official name of this shade of orange is “Vacationed On The Sun.”

  49. Murphy says:

    I don’t care how much of a vilified social climber she is, my tax dollars don’t pay for her unnecessary helicopter trips and 300 pairs of the same suede blue heels– so I don’t care what she does.

    • notasugarhere says:

      UK taxpayers paid for security for at least one of her book signing events. RPOs were seen doing a security sweep.

      • MinnFinn says:

        I had forgotten about that. I was really suprised when it was in fact true. My biggest shock about The Buckets though was that taxpayers funded security enhancements to CarolE’s family seat in Bucklebury.

      • anne_000 says:

        Why would the RPOs be used to guard Pippa at a book signing?

        Maybe Carole had Kate lie to the RPOs about going just so Pippa could that ‘service.’

      • anne_000 says:

        …could use that service…

  50. Grant says:

    She matches her pumps! She looks like she stepped off the set of The Only Way is Essex.

  51. msw says:

    I think this is the best headline I’ve ever seen on this site. Bravo, Kaiser.

  52. Lola says:

    Orange?!???! She looks like a TOMATO!

  53. The Original Mia says:

    She out-orange Speaker Orange. Didn’t think that was at all possible. I like the dress, but I can’t get past her glowing flaming cheeto face.

  54. Jessica says:

    Oh this made my day “on a scale of Donald Trump to Dorito, how orange is Pippa Middleton” I am still laughing!!! OH and Bella’s first comment, that was priceless!!! LOL

  55. Jayna says:

    Everything about her is average. Looks, personality, career (what career). Why are people still trying to make her happen?

    • Anne says:

      because we want to live vicariously through the fame & privilege, of course. it’s more fun if she’s fabulous.

  56. wow says:

    Ohh Pippa, no honey. Just all of “no”.

  57. Illyra says:

    Just wanted to say that I laughed out loud at the title, good job on that Kaiser

  58. taxi says:

    The dress is frumpy & would look good on a grandmother. An inch shorter might help.

  59. Jag says:

    Wow, she is orange!

    Just want to point out that we do need sunlight to hit our skin to convert vitamin D in our bodies, so going without sunscreen regularly – in an appropriate way – is actually a good thing. The problem is when a person keeps getting sunburned, which really damages the skin. Yes, tanning damages the skin, too, but there is a sweet spot in getting enough sunlight for vitamin D and not harming oneself.

    Where sunscreen is concerned, make sure you research every ingredient in it becomes some countries are better than others with keeping carcinogenic ingredients out of such products.