I made the mistake of reading some of the “top tweets” for “George HW Bush” yesterday. The top tweets were mostly trolls yelling at Heather Lind for telling her story publicly, and quite a few comments about how what she experienced wasn’t “really” sexual assault or any kind of assault. Just as a reminder: you have to give your consent to be touched in any way. If you do not give your consent and someone touches any part of your body, that is assault. After Heather Lind came out this week, a second woman is now telling her HW Bush story. It is strikingly similar to Lind’s story. You can read the full story here at Deadspin. Some highlights:
Jordana Grolnick, a New York actress, has a story to tell that doesn’t sound very different at all. “I got sent the Heather Lind story by many people this morning,” Grolnick says. “And I’m afraid that mine is entirely similar.”
Rumors about Bush groping actresses in this manner have been circulating for a while. More than a year ago, a tipster passed word about the Heather Lind incident to Deadspin. We were told that Bush had, during a photo opp, groped her and told her that his favorite magician was “David Cop-a-Feel” while fondling her.
(Reached for comment, Bush spokesperson Jim McGrath provided the following statement: “At age 93, President Bush has been confined to a wheelchair for roughly five years, so his arm falls on the lower waist of people with whom he takes pictures. To try to put people at ease, the president routinely tells the same joke — and on occasion, he has patted women’s rears in what he intended to be a good-natured manner. Some have seen it as innocent; others clearly view it as inappropriate. To anyone he has offended, President Bush apologizes most sincerely.”)
In reporting out the tip, I found two actresses—Lind and Grolnick—who had accused Bush of groping, and also two Twitter users who, on April 4, 2014, made reference to the “David Cop-a-Feel” joke. At the time, these people either didn’t respond to Deadspin’s requests for comment, or could not be reached. Today, in the wake of the Lind story, I tried again, and Grolnick wanted to tell her story.
In August 2016, Grolnick was working at a Maine production of Hunchback of Notre Dame. The former president, who summers in nearby Kennebunkport and frequents this theater, caught a performance. He came backstage during an intermission, she says, and she and the rest of the cast gathered for a photo with him. Grolnick now says that other actors had told her before the photo that Bush had a reputation for fondling during photo ops, but she didn’t take it seriously.
“I guess I was thinking,” she says, “‘He’s in a wheelchair, what harm could he do?’” Then her question got answered. “We all circled around him and Barbara for a photo, and I was right next to him,” she says. “He reached his right hand around to my behind, and as we smiled for the photo he asked the group, ‘Do you want to know who my favorite magician is?’ As I felt his hand dig into my flesh, he said, ‘David Cop-a-Feel!’”
Grolnick says others in the room “laughed politely and out of discomfort.” Former first lady Barbara Bush was among those nearby. “[She] said something along the lines of, ‘He’s going to get himself put into jail!’ to which we laughed harder,” Grolnick says.
“I don’t want to belittle Heather Lind for feeling violated,” she says. “Now that the #metoo movement has brought this all to light, I think I should have been a little more alarmed to be touched so inappropriately by a man who was once the leader of the free world. He knows the power he has, and the reverence he deserves, even while sitting perhaps somewhat senile in a wheelchair. What I’ve come to realize is that if we tolerate these small comments and grazes from men on the street or former presidents, they might assume that it’s ok with us, and they may take it as permission to do who-knows-what else. I realize that making light of the situation was the wrong move. It wasn’t ok for him to do that to me. He wasn’t able to give me a job or a movie deal, so I didn’t feel compromised or pressured to do anything more, but the comments and assumptions about our bodies must stop, at all levels.”
I believe Jordana Grolnick. As I said yesterday, I have experiences with older men being the absolute worst, especially if they have health problems and feel like their health issues give them carte blanche to sexually harass and assault. Obviously, the people around HW Bush know this is a problem too, because the Bush spokesperson’s bullsh-t apology has gotten a lot more involved: “…On occasion, he has patted women’s rears in what he intended to be a good-natured manner. Some have seen it as innocent; others clearly view it as inappropriate. To anyone he has offended, President Bush apologizes most sincerely.” Translation: He’s a dirty old man and he believes he can get away with groping women and then saying “it was completely innocent!” NOPE.
Photos courtesy of Getty.
It’s horrible that this happened but at least the distasteful new trend of viewing Bush through rose colored glassess will stop.
I didn’t know we viewed him through rose-colored glasses. The fact that he thinks Bill Clinton is his son from another mother should have raised clues about his attitude toward women. I voted for Bill but if we viewed the Monica Lewinsky incident today it would be an abuse of power.
George Bush has a foot in the grave. There is absolutely no point in talking about him assaulting someone from his wheelchair. He is not going to change. Nursing home old men are notorious for this type of behavior regardless of whether they did it when they were younger. I don’t understand why it is a thing for them. Is it about power, is it about being near death and grabbing anything you can… i just don’t know.
Not here necessarily. But there was a lot of gushing about that photo of the presidents earlier in the week. And a softening of the way people view both Bush Snr and Junior in the wake of Trump. Personally I loath all three of them.
Infringements on bodily autonomy need to be called out at every level if a cultural shift is going to happen. These women are incredibly brave to speak out against the oldest of old boy networks.
It’s so freaking disgusting that he’s trying to use being in a wheelchair to excuse grabbing women’s asses. If he can’t reach higher, how about just keeping his hands to himself. Somehow I’m sure he manages that when taking photographs with men.
Anyway, hopefully now people stop giving him the benefit of the doubt. He’s not physically healthy, but absolutely nothing about his recent appearances suggests he has dementia, and these accounts are years old anyway.
He wasn’t in a wheelchair when he spanked Teri Hatcher.
It’s also freaking disgusting that his wife joked about how he’s going to end up in jail. Talk about complicit.
I think they are from a generation when “David-cop-feel” was considered funny. They are two crusty old dinosaurs who should retire from public life because they can no longer continue to evolve their behavior to reflect today’s standards and expectations.
Can you imagine if Hilary was going around squeezing young actors’ asses or saying she could “grab them by their dicks” because she’s famous?
And yet Bush is getting a pass from so many people…
“Somehow I’m sure he manages that when taking photographs with men.”
Exactly. They are acting like it couldn’t be avoided, yet I don’t hear any men having the same story.
Just the fact that he is doing this, the behavior, the tasteless jokes, and most importantly the fact that he is NINETY-THREE years old, very strongly suggests dementia to me. That it no way makes it ok, and the women should not have to put up with this crap.
I understand though, because my dad has dementia and he pulls this same shit, and I can talk to him about it and he will genuinely understand that it was inappropriate, be remorseful and say that he was having a bad day. This does absolutely nothing to prevent the same thing from happening the next time that he’s having an off day. He can’t control it. Thank goodness when these sexually inappropriate behaviors set in with elderly men, they are generally too old and feeble to physically assault women.
When the second statement came out explaining what he does…I knew more women would be coming forward because this, like all these assault stories by all these different men, follows a clear pattern for him and the people who surround him.
If this is something he’s only started doing in the last couple of years it might be a sign of dementia. To me the tell is that security tried to blame her, saying she should not have stood next to him. He can’t control himself. Dementia would not give him permission to feel women up, but he also wouldn’t be responsible for his behavior in the same sense as Harvey Weinstein. The question then would be why his handlers put him in situations where he does this, sexually violating. “Copping a feel” is not benign.
This behavior is not due to dementia. He has always behaved this way.
I agree with lightpurple I have heard rumors about the Bush’s for years. The elder Bush was a known cheat. I believe these women.
There were a lot of apologists yesterday and today about his being old and possibly “senile” (not the correct term in any case). While it’s true that progressive cognitive impairment can reduce impulse control, this truly does not appear to be what has been happening with Bush. He’s a groper, period, and the “joke” is now on him. The Bush family has a long history of covering up multiple transgressions across its decayed generations. They’re really full of it.
It’s not ageist to accuse an old man of assault. It doesn’t help any old person to throw down the age card, either. People are responsible for their actions until the minute that they no longer can be, and as far as we can tell, he is and was responsible. Wheelchair or not. And this is also insulting to the millions of people in wheelchairs, of all ages, who manage to take photos and get through their busy days without groping people.
He is and always has been a dirty man. I’m dropping the “old” out of that because his behavior has been going on for a very long time, it isn’t a matter of him being elderly with memory issues and because I see ageism as a real problem in our society. He got caught on video spanking Teri Hatcher years ago. After his debate with Geraldine Ferraro in 1984, he referred to her as “a piece of ass.” He appointed Clarence Thomas to the Supreme Court and lived through the Anita Hill history. As president, he was responsible for the EEOC, which enforces the Equal Employment Opportunity Act that prohibits sexual harassment and gender discrimination in the workplace. This guy knows better and he still has felt free to touch whenever he wanted and that wife of his has always looked the other way.
And no, this is not just being a product of his time. I have great uncles his age. They know better. They would never touch a woman inappropriately. And, as I said above, he was responsible for enforcing sexual harassment laws. He is a dirty man.
Ugh. I hadn’t heard some of this history although the Clarence Thomas appointment still infuriates.
And amen to your second paragraph. I’m realizing more and more that I should count myself lucky that my dad, uncles and other men of their generation that I have known have been entirely respectful and appropriate in their behavior.
And can you guess what his defense was for the comment about Ferraro? That he was using “a football term.” Yes, locker room talk.
The joke is funny because David Copperfield has also been accused of a sex crime.
Hilarious, I tell ya.
I know I can’t stop laughing. 😐
I feel terrible for the women who got groped by former President Bush. There is no excuse really for sexually assaulting women at any age. If his dementia has progressed to the point where he can’t control this unnaceptable behavior then they must restrain his arms. It is terrible that he ruined his legacy. He will be remembered as a sex predator by future generations.
This does not excuse him, or anyone else, and there are definitely dirty old men who use their age as an excuse to be wildly inappropriate … But I’ll also note that I believe Bush 41 is suffering from Parkinson’s, which at his age would almost certainly include Parkinson’s-related dementia. My mother-in-law suffered with Parkinson’s for more than 40 years (longer than I knew her) and, for the last decade or so, that included the dementia component. A sweet, demure women — literally a school librarian most of her life — she could suddenly became belligerent and coarse, which was very much not the “real” her. She also lost awareness of her body and personal space, and the disease itself makes limb control virtually impossible at various points in the day, often without warning because you’re never quite sure how well, or not, the medication will work. At 93, or 89, with Parkinson’s, I’d guarantee Bush 41 very much has mobility and control issues.
Again, I am NOT excusing Bush in any way, shape or form, but it is important to consider that cognitive issues can contribute to inappropriate behavior, even repeated incidents of it. (My mother-in-law couldn’t always control her body, but she frequently told the same Parkinson’s-punchline joke to explain to people, even to those who already knew her well, because she was embarrassed by her lack of control.) . It doesn’t make the behavior OK, but reality must be taken into consideration.
He groped Teri Hatcher in the same way 9 years ago.
If that and these incidents 4 years ago were due to Parkinson’s related dementia, by now he’d be well past the point of actively participating in the kind of public appearances he’s done in the last few years.
And again, if this was due to a medical condition, his wife or handlers would apologize and explain that to the women he touched. They did not, and instead have issued statements like “he has patted women’s rears in what he intended to be a good-natured manner” and the good ol’ standby “sorry if you were offended”.
Julianna:
Please study degenerative brain diseases such as Lewy Body Dementia, Frontotemporal Dementia and Alzheimers. Onset begins long before symptoms become obvious to people outside of the family.
There’s never only one. If you believe you can grab someone, you don’t believe that for just one day.
“If you do not give your consent and someone touches any part of your body, that is assault.” Okay but guys, if someone touches my shoulder, that’s not assault. That’s unnecessary and inappropriate if I don’t know you and good rule of thumb is don’t touch strangers, especially in a professional setting. But to label ANY touching at all assault is a bit much.
I take your point. The legal definition of assault doesn’t require physical contact, just the threat of bodily harm and the apparent ability to carry it out. Battery requires physical contact. Intentional and voluntary, harmful or offensive physical contact with a person or their belongings (like a purse) without consent. Many of these women have experienced battery, certainly, such as in the GHWB context, but sexual assault as well when victimized by Weinstein, Halperin, et al.
The legal definition of sexual assault actually does include touching certain body parts. Really, women know the difference.
The buttocks are a sexual and private part of the body and touching them is assault.
We’re not talking about shoulders here. False argument.
I was quoting Kaiser. I didn’t make that up.
Who are the “some” that saw it as innocent? (it also implies they knew along and no one told him to quit it) and would they define “good natured manner” because there is nothing good nor natural to assault/groping / slapping a lady’s butt. Would a man slapping another man’s butt see it as “yah good ole natured manner fellah “. No. The male victim would see his fist right on the face of the man. It is not ok for a old guy to get away with it, age or wheelchair bound. No pass.
Right? All these guys dismissing it as “innocent” need to think how they’d react if some guy came over and grabbed their crotch.
Hey guys I mean I don’t want to take the conversation TOO far away from where it should be so, to be clear:
-f*ck that guy
but also, how does GHWB even know about David Copperfield as a magician, I just don’t see it, which means he must have like sought out a joke to make while doing this.
Copperfield performed at the White House during W’s presidency.
Yeah but, I mean, this guy is 93. I don’t think he’s keeping up with that.
I just want to know how much EFFORT went into this dumb excuse to grope women, you know?
Like, did he workshop it a bit, was it previously “Hey, wanna know my favourite semi-autobiographical Dickens novel?”, but he Secret Service guys let him know it wasn’t playing? Barb seems well aware of it; most articles about it have her commenting on him doing it, did she have some critiques about this “joke”?
Obviously he knows who the magician is, but I don’t really think that’s relevant.
These stories are exhausting. Much respect to the women who are coming forward.
Unfortunately, I’ve had to spend more time than I want to in nursing homes and in elder care facilities. One of the side effects of dementia and Parkinson’s is a loosening of inhibitions – in both men and women. That 90 year old great-grandmother who never used foul language before is now cursing a blue streak, regardless of who is in the room. She’s also propositioning the male nurses, caregivers, maintenance staff, visitors, etc. That 85 year old man who never looked at a woman other than his wife, now comments on the appearance of every woman who walks in the room. It is often part of the progression of their illness. I had one old man proposition me (more than once) in front of my husband, who is his nephew, even after being reminded multiple times who I was and that his behavior was inappropriate. If you work with the elderly, you know this happens – it can be uncomfortable, but so is dealing with the incontinence that is also part of the disease. These are people who frequently do not remember the names of their children and grandchildren – they call everyone “honey” and “sweetheart” because they are embarrassed and are trying to hide the fact that they can’t recall names.
Granted, GHWB has a long-standing reputation for really bad behavior with women. There is no getting around that. Historically, he kept his hands to himself when Barbara was around, more recently, that doesn’t appear to be the case. The more recent problems seem to be part of his Parkinson’s. What that means is that the people around him should have been stepping in more quickly to control the situation and his behavior. It’s probably time for him to retire from public appearances.
Everything that he did 10+ years ago is on him. I’ll cut him some slack for the inappropriate behavior of the last few years. I’ve seen enough of both to know the difference between run-of-the-mill sleazy guys and the side effects of dementia. I have no sympathy for one and a lot of patience with the other.
@Liz, you said what I was trying to say, far better. He’s been battling Parkinson’s for a very long time, based on progression it’s not hard to imagine it’s been 20+ years, though he didn’t confirm he had the disease until 2012, when he lost the ability to walk on his own.
As you said, dementia can both create behaviors that never existed, or lower inhibitions to bring out things someone would never have done when in their “right mind.” The latter usually happens long before the former. It is a progressive disease. And it often takes someone from outside the sufferer’s inner circle, who become a little numb to the slow daily decline, to see how bad it really has become. (Throw in a little loved one denial, as well.)
To be clear, George HW Bush may very well be a creep that thinks patting women on the butt or otherwise copping a feel is genuinely harmless. He is wrong, but he is also nearly a 100 years old, and the standard of “acceptable” behavior when he came of age vs now is vastly different, as it should be.
I think that when you know better, you should do better, no matter what time you grew up in, but in the case of dementia he may also no longer be capable of the “know” part. I actually have no problem believing that Bush 41 — rich, white, privileged and powerful — was always a bit of a misogynistic creep (see: his sons), so this isn’t really me defending him.
No one should be touched against their will. Period. No woman should be expected to excuse unwanted attention from a powerful man. I believe that fully AND, at the same time, I feel his behavior, ingrained or not, was, at the very least, exacerbated by his disease, which makes situation feel like it has a lot more gray areas than many others that have recently come to light.
For me, an ill, 93-year-old man touching bottoms and making slightly off-color dad jokes isn’t admirable or acceptable, but it’s also not in same category as Weinstein, O’Reilly, Cosby, Ailes, Trump, Allen, Polanski, Toback, et al.
It’s not that I think it’s in any way wrong to call Bush out, per se, but at the same time it feels like it could cloud this very important, very serious issue; Give a reason for certain segments to excuse the even more deplorable behavior on the part of others (i.e. “they even went after an ill, dying old man, so I why should I believe them about ____”).
The problem is that so many abusers/harassers genuinely don’t think they’ve done anything wrong. “It was a compliment!,” “I was just joking,” “it was mutual,” etc. so providing a high profile instance where someone who could arguably, genuinely NOT have known they were doing something wrong, really muddies those waters.
Important Add … One thing that is not even a slight shade of gray though is how awful the actress who originally came forward with this claim has been treated. Horrible. Despicable. It personifies why women are afraid to speak out, so please don’t mistake my mild caveats regarding the level of media attention this may or may not deserve as ANY kind of criticism towards a women coming forward to share her experience.
Excellent post. I was thinking the same thing. I work with the elderly and have had my bottom touched on several occasions. I do not in any way shape or form consider myself a victim of anything. I told everyone one of them to never do that again, that is inappropriate and this is not “back in the day” and women do not put up with such things at all anymore.
Muddying the waters is a very correct assessment. Kind of like the difference between getting your face slapped and having your head beat in with a baseball bat, both are very wrong but do not in any way try to say one equals the other for then you do get people who simply turn off listening to any of it, even the very serious allegations.
Excellent posts, Liz and S. Thank you.
I have a close friend with Parkinson’s/Lewy Body Dementia. I have seen his personality change gradually over the years. I always though highly of him for being such a gentlemen, even when those around him weren’t so much. These last years there has been a change. He has become overly flirtatious, bordering on inappropriate. He sometimes seems to think I’m his girlfriend, even grabbing my knee, while I was sitting with both him, and my husband. On other days he seems perfectly fine. My point is, it happens. If he was doing it years ago, OK then, but if he wasn’t…..I’m sorry, cut some slack. I also think this weakens the fight and clouds the larger issue. Pick your battles for the best impact and outcome.
He is the same category Weinstein, O’Reilly, Cosby, Ailes, Trump, Allen, Polanski, Toback, Uncle Terry and so on his has been doing this for years just because he is 93 now doesn’t change anything.
Clearly age has not changed anything this isn’t new behavior, when he was younger he didn’t see assaulting women as a problem and he and his handlers don’t see it as one now.
@S: Insightful, articulate post. I have no trouble believing that Bush, Sr. may have been doing this for years. But now in his mid-90s with physical and mental infirmities, he is not responsible for his actions, as offensive as they are. HOWEVER, his family and the Secret Service do bear responsibility and have an obligation to make sure his hands stay in his lap. Short of duck taping his mouth shut, I don’t see how they stop the rude, sexist jokes, though. This type of behavior is not acceptable and no woman should have to put up with it.
It’s way past time for his family to stop wheeling him out for events if he can’t behave himself.
GB is more like Bill Clinton than we realized! 😉
Or vice versa. I read some pretty awful stuff about the pair of them that I found hard to believe. It’s getting easier now though.
Good. Let the floodgates open. While I’m not excusing this behavior, our history (male dominated that it is) is riddled with this cultural mindset. Women have always swept this shit under rugs because they had to. Go back decades. And then go back centuries. What we’re experiencing now has been a long time coming. Screaming complicity during this decade, and maybe last decade, may hold some weight but before that, context and relativity come first. We can’t shame former generations of women for doing what they thought they had to do.
Glad she shared her story
I guess now we know why George HW Bush says Bill Clinton is like a son to him….birds of a feather! Watch out men of this nation, your handsy “locker room talk” moves are coming back to haunt you!!
If we’re going to convict Bush of sexual assault we need to discuss Joe Biden. The media have been detailing his highly inappropriate behavior for years.
Take a look at these photos.
http://gawker.com/joe-biden-we-need-to-talk-about-the-way-you-touch-wome-1686648038
This must be a nonpartisan issue. We can’t give a free pass to someone just because they pretend to be defenders of women’s rights.
Well, I guess HW likes that wheelchair more than I thought. I’m glad she came forward, and I hope others do, too. Not just with him, but ANY and ALL men in power. Or just men.
I believe every woman who says this happened to them. I am hoping that not a soul tries to say that this man is incapable of behaving this way simply because the Bush name holds weight in many people’s eyes… especially since he hasn’t even fucking denied it and issued that pathetic excuse for an apology. Putting his hands on a woman’s ass is a “dirty joke”??? It doesn’t shock me in the least though; if there is any generation that I actually expect to hear stories like this about, it is 100% his. Men in his age group are the men who set the precedent and largely made things the way they are. It was the “greatest generation” who took the ball and ran with it. It’s not like sexism, sexual assault and harassment hasn’t existed for years, but I believe their generation was the one that got the boldest with it.
I had an uncle on my mom’s side of the family not much younger than Bush who thought it was OK to put his hands all over the ass of every pretty woman in our family. He thought he was a member of the Rat Pack and would jokingly say things to me like “I would pay you to just walk across the room.” I was so disgusted and shocked when one of my cousins who was my idol growing up actually said it was cute and harmless… she literally acted like I was awful for implying that it was gross and wrong. I don’t know if it was supposed to be acceptable because he wasn’t a blood relative or what, but I knew from a young age that I wasn’t OK with that. He died last year and I felt a sense of relief. I used to dread seeing him at family functions.
It breaks my heart just how much sexual harassment and assault is just synonymous with being a woman. Who doesn’t have multiple stories?! It’s so deeply ingrained in the female experience. I have to say, I feel good about all of these stories coming out. I’m an optimistic realist but I truly feel like this is how change gets started. I’m really hopeful.
I read the comments on the Daily mail about the first incident and almost all were against her and misogynist in general. Sexual harassment/assault awareness didn’t even last a month.
I once knew a man, a lovely older man, who had had an illustrious career in the Navy, who became ill with Alzheimer’s in his 80’s.
Did he grab women’s asses? Never! The last time I spent time with him, I was a young, vibrant woman in my late 20’s, with a lovely ass to boot. As I was leaving, he leaned over to his wife, the only person he recognized at that point in his illness, and he said, “Mama, I don’t want her to leave, she makes me happy. Can you ask her to stay?” Breaks my heart every time I think of this moment.
Point? He was a decent man being decent even in his altered state. Dementia, as some are arguing, does not turn a decent person into an indecent person.
Papa Bush doesn’t get a pass from me. Never did.
Sorry but that’s not true. There are many types of dementia, Alzheimer’s is only one. They all involve alterations to the brain, and some of them do in fact cause a person to behave in ways they never would have if they were in their right mind.
I doubt that’s what is going on with old man bush however, I think he’s just a filthy old man.
Another one just came out; a few hours ago, Christina Baker Kline at Slate published her account of being groped by GHWB in April 2014, complete with “David-Cop-a-Feel” joke. Ugh. And she addresses the fact that he seemed completely compos mentis and in control of his behavior.
I met him when I was working a sporting event once. He beckoned me over to him, told me he had been watching me, that he was impressed with me, and that I was beautiful. We posed for a picture. He didn’t touch me, but the interaction was weird. His wife was within earshot, as was a son and grandson. None of them even looked at me.