Paris, Lindsay and Britney on 11/26/06. Credit: Bauergriffinonline

Excuse me while I fall off my chair laughing. According to Page Six, Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan are profoundly disturbed with all of the attention being lavished upon Kate and John Gosselin. Of course they are. In Lindsay and Paris’s minds (is “mind” the right word?), the Gosselins haven’t done anything to get all this attention. I mean, really, what did Kate and John do that Lindsay and Paris haven’t done a million times over? Kate Gosselin is nailing her bodyguard, right? Well Paris nailed her Budget Ryan Reynolds on a boat, during a big fancy party. Where’s Paris’s US Weekly cover? Kate Gosselin is obsessed with money and freebies. So Lindsay stole $400 K in jewelry. Where’s Lindsay’s Star cover, hm?

Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton are being replaced by reality-TV couple Jon and Kate Gosselin on covers of celebrity weeklies — and they can’t stand it.

“Lindsay and Paris hate not being on the covers of weeklies,” said a source. “That’s why Lindsay has been causing so much havoc and pulling these antics. And why Paris had a big blow- up with Doug [Reinhardt].”

The married stars of “Jon & Kate Plus 8” on TLC have been garnering attention from all the glossies, which have seen circulation boosts from their alleged infidelities and family struggles.

[From Page Six]

Honestly, though, Paris and Lindsay have never really been fixtures of tabloid covers. Their antics make it inside the tabloid magazines, but generally, most tabloids know that their antics are mild amusements, not worthy of a cover. But that doesn’t answer the question of why the Gosselins were on so many covers – surely people aren’t that interested in their every move. I wish the celebrity weeklies would put some of the scandalous men on the covers. For next week, I’d like to see Sean Penn or maybe “William Joel” and his gold-digging child-bride.