Eva Mendes: ‘If you hate a photo of yourself wait 20 years’

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Eva Mendes made a thoughtful observation on Instagram that we’ve heard from other celebrities. She said that she used to nitpick her face when she was younger and didn’t realize how beautiful she was at the time, essentially. Eva is my age and I remember about 15 years ago when she was doing a lot of sexy photoshoots and roles. Maybe she wasn’t as confident as she came across, which is true of so many celebrities and models. Here’s what she wrote on the #TBT photo, which is the first one below. I’m also including a response she gave to a comment, which is pretty wise, via People Magazine.

Just came across this picture from a movie that was almost 20 years ago.

I remember seeing this photo back then and thinking my face looked “weird “ and that my bone structure was odd …yadda yadda ..you know all those insecurities that a 26 year old can have.

Meanwhile 20 years later and now I wish I still had that “weird “ face and odd “bone structure” 😩

Why’s my point ? Im not sure. Maybe it’s if you hate a photo of yourself wait 20 years then you’ll love it.

“Youth is wasted on the young” -Oscar Wilde

Mendes’ post filled with comments agreeing with her message, including one woman who said, “Oh to be in your 20s and have the wisdom of your 40s!” That led [Eva] to respond, adding, “yes, agreed. That’s why I love this quote so much! But let’s think of it this way…we’re in our 40s and it can feel daunting but think when we’re 60 and we look back to today we’ll think ‘we were babies in our 40s!’ Ok maybe not babies but still young is what I mean. It’s all relative.”

[From Instagram and via People]

Eva’s comment is so true and I need to keep this in mind. My mom has told me that time goes fast and to appreciate where you are in life, especially in terms of your body. I was hard on myself in my 20s, but I’m still hard on myself. It makes me want to take more pictures and videos to both remember and appreciate things. It’s not just about self image, either, it’s about understanding your identity and trying to stop yourself from repeating the same harmful patterns.

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13 Responses to “Eva Mendes: ‘If you hate a photo of yourself wait 20 years’”

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  1. Normades says:

    I have a make-up artist friend who said for a good picture you should look at the camera like you’re in love. It works.

    Also I knew someone who took care of celebrity clients for an airline and said that of all the actors she ever met Eva was the most stunning in person.

    Also I don’t need 20 years, sometimes a few weeks and I’ll think the picture is OK even if I hated it at the time.

    • Monica says:

      Yes, Normades! One of the last pieces of advice my mom gave me before her death was, “Look at that camera like you’re in love with it.” It doesn’t make me prettier, but at least I don’t look like I’m holding an ax below the frame. 🤣

  2. nicegirl says:

    This sentiment really resonates with me. I was so hard on myself as a younger lady and when I look back at photos I’m wishing I could comfort younger me with a hug and pep talk! We need to be kinder to ourselves.

  3. Annaloo. says:

    She’s 100% right

  4. Rainbow says:

    I haven’t seen a recent picture of hers but I am sure she is still beautiful.

  5. Kath says:

    For some reason for me it’s the opposite lol. There are some pictures that in the moment I really like and think I look good. Then when I see it again a few years later I don’t understand why I thought that was a good picture…

  6. Seraphina says:

    Hell, I see pics of myself from 8 years ago and think that I was unfairly harsh. She is beautiful.

  7. Becks1 says:

    That sentiment is so true.

    I was so hard on myself when I was younger, and I didn’t even realize it. I studied abroad in Spain in 2003 and while i was there I got my (long, straight, blonde highlights hair) cut – very short, lots of layers around my face, and dyed a dark red (it really looked great and was SO different.) Anyway I sent a picture to my mom (like an actual photograph in an envelope, lol) so she could see and I found the picture a few weeks ago and I said on the back, “I look fat here and hate how my face looks but at least you can see my hair.” I was 20 and was worried about sending a picture to my mom because of how I looked. And yet at the time I would have told you I was confident!

    In general I look back at pictures and I do think “hey! I looked pretty good!” It’s not even 20 years, its like 5 years, lol.

  8. Mabs A'Mabbin says:

    I’ve always been hard on myself. I’ll always be hard on myself. If there’s one thing I’ve learned all these many years, it’s that lol. As you age, you realize you were far too hard and judgemental about yourself, and you wish you would’ve…(fill in the blank). And you also come to know that in the future, you’ll look back and laugh and cringe and pine for that person you knew you were but didn’t acknowledge. But in the present, we are who we are. And exercise, meditation, hobbies, volunteering, et al, exist as healthy distractions and self growth, but inside, we’re creatures of habit, and fighting those urges of self sabotage, belittling, fear and loathing…these are lifetime battles.

  9. Beth says:

    One of the (few) great things about being in my early 60s is I now appreciate how I look. Though I still wish I were 5’10” with legs up to here, I’ve learned to love my hair and face and figure — and that confidence comes through. But, yeah, wish I still had my 30s shelf butt …

  10. Susan says:

    As a gen xer I will say that old photos of me are FAR better….because they’re blurrier! They’re not digital and they are much kinder to skin and blemishes. Ha.

  11. SarahCS says:

    Oh my goodness I absolutely agree with her. I’m in my 40’s now and still have to have very conscious conversations with myself to appreciate what I have while I have it as year on year it’s all changing.

  12. Monica says:

    I’m in my 60s and try to keep in mind that when I’m 80 I’ll probably wish I were 20 years younger. Enjoy it now, whatever “it” is!