'09
I used to watch Family Ties when I was a kid, but I don’t remember much about it beyond Alex P. Keaton’s conservatism and how I thought Justine Bateman was, like, the coolest thing ever. I never paid much attention to the parents. But I should have! Because Meredith Baxter just came out of the closet, and she’s getting a hell of lot more interesting. Apparently, Baxter has been married three times, she’s a recovering alcoholic (she’s been sober for 19 years), she’s a mom to five adult children, and she only figured out she was a lesbian when she was 49 years old, 13 years ago. Since figuring out her stuff, she’s been in a four-year relationship with a woman, and she just went on a lesbian cruise! Hurray! Here are some excerpts from Baxter’s Advocate interview (full piece is here):
The Advocate: Let’s get right to it. What has brought you to this point, where you’re coming out publicly?
Meredith Baxter: Well, to be honest, it was time. And promoted probably from the attention brought from having been on the cruise, I knew that something was coming from that. So I thought, Let me just beat them to it and tell it in my words instead of someone’s made-up words.When did you realize you were gay?
Thirteen years ago I had a short-term affair with somebody — a woman — who I just cared for tremendously as a person, [I] was not really attracted to her, but the best way to describe it, [a romance] seemed like the next natural step in our relationship just because I cared about her a lot. Not once — it’s probably hard to imagine — but not once did it occur to me that I was a lesbian. Not once. I just thought, OK, I don’t think so, and went off and got married again for a short period of time. And a couple years after that, I entered my next foray into being with a woman, and the penny dropped at that point.And was that a revelation, or just a slow aha! moment?
No, it was pretty much a revelation. The analogy I’ve used is a story [from] when I was a kid. I never could see very well and I said something to my parents and it kind of went unnoticed, or no one really responded to it. I guess I didn’t make enough noise. When I was 12 I tried on a [friend’s] pair of glasses and I was stunned with how clearly I could see. In truth, I used to think trees looked like lollipops because there was a solid stake and this solid ball. I didn’t know most people could see leaves. Oh, this is how the world is perceived? That’s kind of what having that second relationship made me realize — that this is where I want to be because I was dead to the world in many other ways. I’ve been married three times, and I have a slew of children, but I’ve never felt that kind of connection before in that kind of awakening. It was very profound for me.How was the process of coming out to your grown children?
Oh, a piece of cake. They were cool. All the kids were basically grown — the youngest [twins] were 17 at the time — and everyone was great. They basically just said, “We just want you to be happy.” So I really could not have asked for a better process than that.In your personal life with the people you’ve told, has it been a cakewalk?
Maybe a cakewalk on their side. It was absolute f-cking agony for me, only in the respect that I was so fearful.Fearful of what?
Fearful of reaction, of judgment, of whatever I was sure was going to come. One of my greatest concerns was [for] a little skin care company [Meredith Baxter Simple Works] that I’ve been involved in for 11 years, and [my partners there] are just wonderful people. They’ve been so darling and worked so carefully and honestly with me, and I never said anything to them. I wrote them a letter and got a response that made me just … I could have sung, I was so happy. They were so lovely.When a celebrity comes out, there is a tendency among some gay people to try to make that person a poster child for activism or hold them up as a spokesperson. Is that a role you’re willing to step into, or is it something you haven’t begun to think about?
[The] truth is that coming out is a political act these days because it has so many ramifications. I do a lot of speaking engagements and I have my little skin care company, so I go to trade shows and I interact with the public quite frequently. I haven’t been on prime time in many years on a regular basis, so when I’ve gone out into the Midwest or down in Florida or Louisiana, I was really surprised by the extent of attention I got by people who knew me immediately, who responded to me so beautifully and with a great deal of affection. It surprised me. The message I get is that I’m America’s mom. And because research seems to show that people who have someone who is gay in their family — or a friend or just know someone in the community who is gay — they seem to have a more open attitude about gay and lesbian issues. So I can say I’m still that mom. I am still the same person. I’m nonthreatening, I’m very friendly, I’m accessible, and if they can say, “OK, well, she’s a lesbian, maybe that’s not such a scary thing. And if she can come out and say that without too much fear, then maybe I can do that.” If it makes a difference to a couple of people, then I guess it’s worthwhile. I certainly got tired of hiding to the extent that I was.When Prop. 8 was happening, did you consider coming out then?
No, no, that would have seemed opportunistic. I didn’t see the point in that. I may be wrong, but that’s where I was at that point. It was certainly just heartbreaking to see that go down — I didn’t expect that at all. I really thought we were going to be OK.
[From The Advocate]
She sounds really cool, doesn’t she? She’s not only a recovering alcoholic, she’s also a breast cancer survivor. She also mentions that all of her Family Ties castmates know, and that they’re cool with it. Baxter also appeared on Today, and came out yet again. She told Matt Lauer: “I am a lesbian and it was a later-in-life recognition. Some people would say, well, you’re living a lie and, you know, the truth is not at all. This has only been for the past seven years…I’ve always lived a very private life. To come out and disclose stuff is very antithetical to who I am.” We’ll respect your privacy Meredith! I’m so happy for her. She seems like she’s in a good place in her life, and it also sounds like her family is really cool about everything. Awesome.
Meredith Baxter at the Beverly Hilton Hotel in Los Angeles, California on July 8, 2009. Credit: WENN
Written by Kaiser
Posted in Gay Issues, Meredith Baxter
- TV Shows that outstayed their welcome [Pajiba]
- Goopy and Cameron Diaz went to a Coldplay concert [Lainey Gossip]
- The bacon milkshake! [D-Listed]
- Ashanti looks... good? [Go Fug Yourself]
- 20 great songs under 2 minutes [Fark]
- Snooki and J-Woww on notice [IDLYITW]
- Jennifer Aniston through the years [Popsugar]
- Kirsten Dunst looks so pretty here [Evil Beet]
- Mila Kunis without makeup [Celebslam]
- The awful cover letter all of Wall St. is mocking [Gawker]
48 Responses to “Meredith Baxter, 62, comes out of the closet”
Leave a Reply
By commenting you agree to our comment policy
Use the "Report this comment as spam or abuse" link to ask the moderators to delete a comment if it's offensive. If your comment disappears, it may have been eaten by the spam filter. Please e-mail cbcomments at gmail.com to get it retrieved.
Get an icon next to your name by signing up for a free Gravatar
Holy sh!t!
I saw on the Today show a pre-interview blurb about her revealing some personal information, but I’m not exactly a fan of hers, so I left the room and did something else.
I don’t know if I’d have guessed that’s what it was. Well, good for her for recognizing it and not being afraid to say it. I wonder if there’s so much less of a stigma for actresses than for actors. Seems like more women with a fairly high profile are coming out than any men.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
her “aha moment” story is exactly the same as one of the lesbian doctors on Greys anatomy…..
Report this comment as spam or abuse
Awesome! Goes to show that humans can constantly learn, grow, and mature. I admire her enormously.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
I love that she hasn’t botoxed her face to hell.
and LOVED her as Mrs. Keaton.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
Gosh, she’s beautiful.
I identify with her glasses analogy, actually. When I got glasses for the first time at 10 years old, I too was astounded to find out that you were supposed to be able to see distinct leaves on a tree. Blew my mind, too.
I’m glad she found herself.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
She’s so beautiful!
Report this comment as spam or abuse
I am very happy for her
Report this comment as spam or abuse
Sounds like everything with her family and friends is good, so that’s most important. Good for her for being confident enough to discuss it publicly.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
Good for her. I appreciate her frankness and her lack of judgment towards others who come out later in life. A real class act.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
princess pea, I TOTALLY identified with that, too!
when I first put on my glasses, the dr told me to look at the trees, as that is the classic “OMG!” moment for us near-sighted folks.
I was blown away and stood at the window for probably a full five minutes just staring at things outside.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
Oh man I loved Family Ties so much when I was a kid I used to actually record the shows on my tape player and listen to them later! I also did that with Three’s Company!
I loved her as Mrs. Keaton! Coming from a major dysfunctional family, they were the parents I dreamed of having! Good for her!
Report this comment as spam or abuse
OMG! an actress not botoxed and close out!
Report this comment as spam or abuse
Well, good for her. She’ll always be Elise Keaton to me. SHA LA LA LA!
Report this comment as spam or abuse
I’ve always liked her and now I like her even more for sharing her story. Probably was not an easy thing to do, being such a private person. She sounds happy and comfortable and that’s great! I, too, am glad she has been physically aging gracefully, sans botox, etc. She still looks really good.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
Interesting…
Report this comment as spam or abuse
I’ll always think of her in Woman Scorned. She was fantastic!
Report this comment as spam or abuse
Weird to me that celebs feel the needs to broadcast such things, but ok, we know now. Now what?
Always loved her eyes. Striking.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
I love her even more now.
Totally agree with the glasses statements. My parents were shocked when I squealed that I could see the leaves on the trees. I had been telling them for years that I couldn’t see the board at at school, and when that happened, they finally believed me. Corrective lenses are one of the best inventions in the world. lol
Report this comment as spam or abuse
Yes, agreed that she is pretty, with lovely blue eyes, but a skin cream company? I have to honestly say that I wouldn’t buy cream from someone who was so deeply sun-damaged. And the fact that this is my predominant thought totally points up the fact that someone’s sexual orientation simply is, or should be, a non-issue…
Report this comment as spam or abuse
Stephie I believe Perez or someone else outed her and she wanted everything above board, hence she came out to the public. As she said it’s been 13 years since she realized she was gay and four yrs in a releationship. No one knew and she kept it that way. Once again people are not coming out because they want to but because some stupid gossip blogger/ tabloid has forced the issue.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
Holy Lifetime Movie, Batman!
Report this comment as spam or abuse
I am sorry but although it is GREAT that she is not all surgeried and botoxed up, her skin is not lovely.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
Kate Pierson of the B-52′s came out recently as a late-in-life lesbian as well. I think we may see more of this in the future, since I think a lot of older women didn’t even have a concept of the fact that they might not be heterosexual. A very good older friend of mine came out in her late 40′s. It just hit her one day that she loved women!
I am happy for her, and she looks really happy and healthy, but I, too, wondered about how she can promote her own skin care with such sun damage. I hope her line has a sunscreen!
LOL @ ccoop! What would we do, Baby, without us?
Report this comment as spam or abuse
I also find Meredith beautiful. She’s 10 years younger than Marlowe Thomas, but, in my opinion, Marlowe has RUINED her face with lip fillers and botox…she looks plastic.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
Go girl.
Always dug her as a mom on FT.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
I think that a lot of people men & women are coming out more now because the taboo is being lifted.
Many people lived their lives the way other people thought they should, by getting married and having children because that was expected.
All though still kind of makes me wonder what gives others the right to make the decision for you if you are out or not. No one’s business but your own I say.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
I don’t care what team she bats for, good God woman, do something about those wrinkles!!!
Report this comment as spam or abuse
Older actors are coming out because they have nothing to lose. No one wants them for parts anymore so there is no image to protect. Kind of sad that you have to live your life according to someone else’s standards just to have a career. And I don’t believe she didn’t know she was gay until 14 years ago. That’s a lie or she was in major denial which is still a lie because it’s lying to yourself. Anyway, who cares, hope she’s happy.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
I don’t think those skin care products are working.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
I think she would be an awesome candidate for a lil cosmetic surgery now. The thing she has going for her is she didn’t butcher her face up as a young woman so the doctor would be dealing with all factory equipment instead of fixing someone else’s upgrades. Maybe I’m showing my age but I remember her mostly form the old Aaron Spelling show Family. As a kid I remember having a crush on Kristy McNnichols back then.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
“I don’t care what team she bats for, good God woman, do something about those wrinkles!!!”
Is there something wrong with aging? It is not a disease or something to be done about… First people criticize women for botoxing all to hell…then they criticize for being as they are naturally, as if it is not acceptable to just be natural. Ya can’t win. Absolutely ridiculous.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
May you shallow bitches never be 62 and suntanned. You’d be miserable, I take it, and never leave the house.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
Praise St.Angie, I did the same thing! Then I moved onto my fully made bed with the laptop in hand and just closed my eyes. I still was staring at the wall in a daze just like when I read the book
“Subliminal Something” about advertising gimmicks. Okay, thanks CB, I’m not alone.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
Praise, I read that wrong. The nearsighted crap and yeah, I’m nearsighted but I really did have a Baxter-Birney moment in which I needed to escape. Tiger now her. Ugh.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
I wrote a novel about a woman coming out late-in-life called Seeking Sara Summers. For these women it isn’t about getting their 15 minutes of fame (a criticism of Meredith Baxter on another site), it’s about getting a life. I think it takes a tremendous amount of courage to simply be who you are.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
Jessica, if ageing is not a disease, why do people die from it? Ain’t I deep?
Report this comment as spam or abuse
she looks her age, she looks happy and skin damaged or not, she looks beautiful.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
I respect her for going on the Today Show and outing herself before the National Enquirer put its spin on her life. I wish her all the joy her heart can hold.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
Kevin, I don’t think Meredith Baxter was in FAMILY……
Report this comment as spam or abuse
She looks really good for 62 and I like that she lets her wrinkles show.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
Her story reminded me of a good friend of mine. She always had relationships with men but she never seemed to be close to them, even in long term relationships. When she came out everyone said, “Duh, we all knew before you even realized.”
Report this comment as spam or abuse
she was,,,trust
Report this comment as spam or abuse
I just cannot believe no one commented on the awesomeness that was C-DUB’s comment.
Well done! Well done!
Report this comment as spam or abuse
@ Kevin and @ DoMaJoReMc – Meredith WAS in “Family”. James Broderick (Matthew’s father) and Sada Thompson were the parents and Meredith Baxter (Baxter-Birney then?) and Kristy McNichol were the two daughters. There was also a son whose name escapes me. It’s a really old show – late 70′s, so many younger people might not remember it/know about it.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
I’d take a second mortgage out for every kind of surgery before I let my face become like a Tokyo Subway Map for the Blind.
She WAS in Family and she was stunning. She was stunning in FT.
I’m betting come spring there are more pictures and she IS botoxed out!
Report this comment as spam or abuse
I think she looks awesome. Yes she has sun damage but a lot of people her age do because sunscreen wasn’t really used back when she was young, or at least not as abundantly as it is now.
Report this comment as spam or abuse
I have been a fan of Ms Baxters for mant years,of both her talent and beauty. It was about 5 yrs ago after watching an interview, I suddenly thought, I think she is gay. No matter, still talented , still beautiful
Report this comment as spam or abuse
Looking up to the time and try you put into the web log and consummate information you provide! I will bookmark the weblog and also have my childs agree up here often . Thumbs up! ….
Report this comment as spam or abuse