Never let it be said the women of “Desperate Housewives” aren’t divas. After years of rumored feuds, catfights, and general nastiness on the set, departing cast member Nicollette Sheridan decided to go out with a really classy bang. Pissed that people didn’t make a big enough deal over her departure (they neglected to throw her a don’t-let-the-door-hit-you-in-the-ass party), she ransacked her trailer before leaving for the final time. According to the Enquirer, she brought some hired muscle to help her haul everything possible from the place.

“Desperate Housewives” diva Nicollette Sheridan didn’t leave behind much goodwill as she departed from the show. In fact, she didn’t leave much of anything behind!

Hurt at not being given a going-away party, the bold blonde practically stripped her set trailer of items on her last day working on the show.

Shortly after filming her final episode as Edie Britt, the 45-year-old star went back to the Universal lot accompanied by her personal contractor to help load almost EVERYTHING from her trailer into his truck, say sources.

“Nicollette removed everything but the kitchen sink!” a set insider told The Enquirer. “I think she was angry she wasn’t given a farewell party, so she decided to take her own parting gifts.”

[From The Enquirer, March 30 2009, print ed.]

The Enquirer doesn’t actually say what kinds of things Nicollete took. From their phrasing I’m assuming it’s everything that’s not bolted down. But since it’s a trailer – and thus portable – a lot of the stuff probably is secured. I wonder if she actually went so far as to take furniture or the mini fridge? Or if maybe she just hauled off a television and the dishes? Talk about petty and small.

I’ve decided that most actors and actresses are the emotional equivalent of teenagers. They’ve got a ridiculous sense of entitlement and are stuck in a perpetual high school. Few of them take it to Nicollette’s embarrassing extreme though.

Here’s Nicolette Sheridan and a friend leaving My House nightclub on March 6th. That look she’s giving her friend in the picture is hysterical, it’s very “Why are you walking in front of me?” which she corrects in the second. Images thanks to WENN.com.

People have often marveled at dorky David Spade’s ability to land hot women. He’s been linked to Heather Locklear, Pamela Anderson, Carmen Electra, playmate Jillian Grace and most recently Desperate Housewives’ Nicolette Sheridan. Spade 44, was seen making out with Sheridan at her 45th birthday party at a Beverly Hills restaurant Friday night. The two didn’t arrive together and were seated at different tables at first. It’s likely Spade was invited to the party, though, as it wasn’t the first time they’ve been spotted together:

Even though Nicolette Sheridan and David Spade have yet to verbally confirm that they’re a couple, the pair let their body language do the talking on Friday night.

The Desperate Housewives star was celebrating her 45th birthday at new L.A. hot spot Luau in Beverly Hills — the same place they were spotted together a few weeks ago at the grand opening — and onlookers tell OK!, “Nicolette and David were full-on making out!”

The duo arrived separately and even started the dinner at separate booths but couldn’t resist each other for long! According to witnesses, Spade winked at Sheridan and stood at her side while she blew out the candles on her cake. After that, the two retreated to a booth where they cuddled and kissed.

[From OK! Magazine]

Other guests at Sheridan’s PDA-filled party included her coworkers Neal McDouough, Kyle MacLachlan, and Felicity Huffman. Sheridan is said to have sipped on lychee martinis and to have enjoyed a birthday cake inscribed “Happy Birthday Princessa.”

In related David Spade news, the National Enquirer reports this week that Spade has never met his two month old daughter with Playmate Jillian Grace. The 22 year-old single mother is raising the baby with her family’s help in Springfield, Missouri, where she lives in a two bedroom condo. Spade has promised to visit, but has not yet seen his newborn daughter. Spade’s publicist issued a statement when the baby was born that “David and Jillian have been in close contact throughout her pregnancy and he plans to go see the baby during his first break from shooting Rules of Engagement.” He must be busy filming because he hasn’t seen his daughter yet.

Photo credit: PRPhotos

Nicollette Sheridan and Michael Bolton have been flashing some new bling – matching rings worn on their ring fingers! Have they had a secret wedding?

The Desperate Housewives actress and the singer – who got engaged in March 2006 – were seen leaving a New York restaurant both wearing a band on their respective wedding fingers.

A source told the New York Post newspaper: “If they have got married, they’ve kept it very quiet. Michael wasn’t trying to hide his ring, though.”

Michael and Nicollette originally dated in the 90s but split in 1993, before rekindling their romance in 2005.

Stuff

At the beginning of November reports began circulating that Nicollette was pregnant, so maybe their wedding has been moved forward to accomodate a growing baby bump. Michael Bolton denied the rumours, saying “I am not going to be a father again soon,” and adding that they still had yet to plan a wedding.

Of course, I doubt that any celebrity couple can resist the opportunity to sell the exclusive pictures of their nuptials to a tabloid magazine. Fellow Desperate Housewives actress Eva Longoria sold the pictures of her wedding to Tony Parker for $2 million. OK! Magazine bought the rights, which probably paid for the wedding and left the couple with some spare change. Which might have been why she got married in the first place, on the date 7/7/07, in order to make some money and raise her public profile. Perhaps it was cash and not true love that drove those vows, which might explain the text message love affair.

Congratulations to Nicollette and Michael, hope you enjoyed your secret special day – and turned a profit.

Picture note by Celebitchy: Nicollette Sheridan and Michael Bolton are shown on 12/7/07 outside of their hotel. There aren’t any clear shots of Bolton’s left hand and it looks like Sheridan is just wearing her engagement ring at that point. Thanks to Splash News for this photo.

Anyone with enough time and money can have perfect breasts – but picking the breasts you might like to have takes a little longer. UK scientist Patrick Mallucci spent many hours of research looking for the perfect breast to aid you in your decision. His research involved looking at lad’s magazines. Some people really have the worst jobs, don’t they?

In his lecture, titled Concepts in Design for Breast Augmentation, he will express the hope that his insights are used by surgeons providing breast enlargements.

The operation is Britain’s most popular cosmetic surgery procedure, with 6,156 performed last year.

Mr Mallucci said: “I studied a wide variety of photographs of the most popular topless models to work out the various proportions they had in common and what made those particular features attractive.

“These findings allowed me to form a template around which to plan a breast augmentation, and set a standard of aesthetics.

“Obviously personal interpretation and expression has to be accounted for, but this has allowed me to develop a template that I have been using successfully for some time.”

The key aesthetic elements are nipple position and the proportion between the upper and lower halves of the breast, he said.

“The ideal is a 45 to 55 per cent proportion – that is the nipple sits not at the half-way mark down the breast, but at about 45 per cent from the top.”

He added: “All of the models I looked at conformed to these parameters. None of them were augmentedand yet they were clearly considered to have beautiful breasts, so I wanted to examine how that could be achieved in someone not so well-endowed by using an implant.

“It’s about wanting to create something as close to perfection as possible.”

Daily Mail

Apparently Victoria Beckham’s ‘unnaturally round’ boobs are out, and a UK model and actress by the name of Caprice has a perfect pair. Despite Posh’s breasts not being scientifically appealing, many people still request them when they go in for an augmentation surgery. Almost as many request Caprice’s breasts in Britain and if you’re interested, a Texan surgeon is now offering a breast augmentation procedure that takes 30 minutes, then you go home, have a nap, wash your hair and go out for dinner. All the while screaming in agony I assume.

Posh herself seems to be learning that her sex appeal may not be translating well in her new home across the Atlantic – she’s said to be planning a stint with the Pussycat Dolls. That’s the Las Vegas burlesque troupe and not the pop band.

“They’ve been blown away by Victoria since she arrived in LA,” a source said.

“They love her style and think she has the perfect figure for the group.

“They are all huge Spice Girl fans and can’t wait to have her on stage with them.”

ninemsn.com

Other celebrities that have danced with the troupe include Pamela Anderson, Denise Richards, Tori Spelling, Eva Longoria, and Nicolette Sheridan. I think that Victoria is going to be fighting fit for her Spice Girls tour, and is going to absolutely blow everyone away. If she doesn’t snap like a twig.

Header image from the Daily Mail. Image below from Pretty On The Outside.

As if a Michael Bolton solo album wasn’t scary enough, here is the news that he’s planning an album of duets with fiancé Nicolette Sheridan.

According to Female First, Nicollette says, “I am such a shy singer but Michael has made me more confident and my voice has grown. We’re planning an album of duets.”

“You might think its madness but we like the way our voices blend.”

Meanwhile, Michael, known for his soft rock ballads, has nothing but praise for the effort his future wife has been making in her singing.

Michael said, “She’s got a beautiful voice but she has been terrified to sing since she was a kid. For some reason, at a young age, she was convinced that she couldn’t sing and if she thinks anybody’s listening she just shuts up immediately,” reports Female First.

AHN

In other Desperate Housewives news, Eva Longoria and Tony Parker have returned from their honeymoon. The couple, who are rapidly becoming the most hyped and least exciting couple in Hollywood, stayed in the Caribbean islands of Turks and Caicos.

Eva Longoria tells People:

“It was so romantic, it was just the two of us. We were completely alone together. We didn’t see people for days with the exception of room service bringing us food. It was great to be completely, 100-percent alone.”

Note by Celebitchy: And now it’s much better to be back in the spotlight, she added. Pay attention to me! My wedding may be over but I’ll start saying ridiculous shit again soon to make sure my name stays in the glossies.

Yesterday we published the story that Aniston was partying it up in Los Cabos, Mexico with Courteney Cox, Sheryl Crow and Courteney’s family for the holiday. Flynet online has some pictures of the group out to dinner, and it looks like Los Cabos is a favorite with celebrities this season. Apprentice winner Bill Rancic and his girlfriend E! star Giuliana DiPandi were there along with Nicollette Sheridan and Michael Bolton. Flynet reports that they all ate together at the same restaurant on New Year’s eve. Adam Sandler and his wife were also seen out in Los Cabos that day.

On March 9th we reported that Nicolette Sheridan bought a wedding dress. The official news now is that Sheridan and Bolton are engaged. We figured you wouldn’t really care so it took us a little while to report it.

Although they dated before in the early 90s, Sheridan has only been with Bolton since Christmas of last year. What are they thinking? You don’t get engaged after three months, especially if you’re famous. This will be a trainwreck.

Here are pictures of the two in Miami Beach on 3/11/06. Who wears a shearling jacket in Florida?

According to In Touch Magazine, Nicolette Sheridan recently spent $14,000 on a wedding dress after a shopping spree with Teri Hatcher:

Bolton and Sheridan have only been together since Christmas 2005, but this is the second time around for the couple. They were first an item in the early 90s. In mid January of this year Bolton sparked engagement rumors when he admitted he was “very close” to Sheridan:

It sounds like things are going quickly for the couple. They’ve certainly been out together a lot. Here are some pictures from Elton John’s party after the Oscars.