Legendary douchbag useless partier Brandon “Greasy Bear” Davis made a major fool out of himself last night. After partying at the Viper Room – and wearing quite the little outfit, no less – Davis left the club doing the usual paparazzi scamper. You know, something along the lines of “Go away, please leave me alone, I don’t want to talk… hey don’t leave me! What’s wrong with you? What if I make a scene, will you care now?” The guy should be pretty happy the paps even know who he is – though admittedly he’s never gotten a word of good press.

Last night won’t change that – Davis smashed into Pink’s car while backing out of his parking space. Even though he was going pretty slowly, there was a huge dent in the SUV.

Brandon Davis, allegedly drunk, walked out of a liquor store at 1am on Monday morning after a night of partying at the Viper Room. The Mercedes driving socialite backed into an BMW SUV belonging to Pink while trying to leave the parking lot. After a brief meeting with Pink, both parties drove off of the premises. I’m sure Brandon is glad no cops showed up.

[From Hollywood TV]

It’s hard to tell if Brandon was drunk or just tired. To his credit, at least he didn’t pull a Britney Spears: hitting a parked car in front of the paparazzi and then waltzing away. He went back inside the club and found Pink. It’s sort of sad when the best thing you can say about a person is “At least they’re not as bad as ____.”

Here’s video of the incident. I’m fairly certain the grease from Brandon’s hair somehow factored into the crash. Maybe some dripped onto the ground when he was walking to his car, making it impossible for him to brake.

Here’s Brandon Davis looking mournful outside Crown Lounge in Los Angeles on November 5th. Images thanks to WENN.

There are a lot of things Paris Hilton doesn’t need more of. Sex tapes. Giant shoes. Impulsively purchased pets and the diamond-encrusted jewelry she uses to decorate them. And Paris definitely, definitely does need any more products with her name on them. While I used to admit that she was good at branding (i.e. slapping her name and taking credit for other people’s work) she’s definitely getting close to her saturation point, even for people that don’t follow gossip blogs (who became sick of her a long time ago).

Now Paris is working on her very own Vegas hot spot – and although she doesn’t mention a name, I’m pretty damn sure you can bet that it’ll have “Paris” splashed on it somewhere.

Paris Hilton wants a Las Vegas hotspot to call her own! “I’m in talks right now,” the nightclub-loving entrepreneur tells In Touch. “I think I found a really good space.” Paris should have no trouble getting people to line up.

“The Vegas crowds love her,” says a Las Vegas nightlife insider. “It’s a mob scene every time she arrives.” And while the heiress is coy about the details, she already has a name. “But I can’t tell anyone,” she says. “It’s not trademarked yet!”

[From In Touch]

I think the club’s theme should be modeled after Paris’ sex tape. They can hand out night vision goggles at the door so everyone looks kinda green. And then push some random pills in your hand so you stumble around with a glazed, confused look in your eyes while putting just about anything in your mouth that doesn’t run away first. Sounds like a winning idea. She can call it “The Paris Experience” or something like that. And then as soon as you leave you act really embarrassed and threaten to sue everyone involved. It’ll be a sure hit.

Here’s Paris visiting Tivoli in Copenhagen with boyfriend Benji Madden on Tuesday. I don’t think I’ve ever said this about her, but Paris actually looks pretty here. Images thanks to Fame.