Will Smith: ‘Jada and I like to give our kids complete responsibility’

Los Angeles World Premiere of Focus
These are photos of Will and Jada Pinkett Smith at the premiere of Will’s new sexy heist movie with Margot Robbie called Focus. (Bedhead covered the premiere photos of Margot Robbie earlier.) They were loved-up on the red carpet. I keep seeing ads for Focus and it doesn’t look much different from other, likely better sexy heist movies. As Bedhead mentioned it’s still hanging in there on Rotten Tomatoes with a 64% fresh rating. I get the impression that the movie is going to bomb, but I could be wrong.

As part of promotion for the film, Will did an interview with TheMid.com in which he gave some decent quotes about his career and family. Will knows how to do sound bites and while he has a questionable belief system he’s still a thoughtful, interesting guy. Here’s some of what he said:

Being a part of Hollywood must make you no stranger to con men.
Are you kidding? I’m an actor. Everybody is running a con. There are certain things that people want and they’re going to do the things they need to do to get them. All right? They’re gonna wear the clothes and say things they need to say. Everybody is trying to get what they want. At the heart of human interaction is a daily con.

How do you conquer your insecurities?
I think I learned very young to attack fear. There are tons of things that I’m scared of. It’s frustrating to me when I’m scared of something, so I’m forced to go and attack it. It’s been helpful, but it’s been painful.

Your son Jaden and daughter Willow are following in your footsteps and pursuing their own acting careers. What advice are you giving them?
My great-grandmother used to say, “Bought sense is better than that you borrow.” I always took that as doing it yourself. Earning that lump on your head is always better than listening to someone else about the lump they got on their head. Jada and I like to give our kids complete responsibility. Outside of life or death, we like to give them their own choices and put the responsibility of their lives on to them as much as they can handle it.

Do you have any bad habits you’d like to change?
I have that artist’s mind, so I never know where my keys are, where my wallet is, and I don’t really care a lot about clothes. I take my clothes off and drop them. I don’t clean up stuff. I’m always trying to create something, and I need my creative state to be kind of cluttered.

[From The Mid.com]

We’ve heard from both Will and Jada, in so many different ways, that they treat their kids like adults and let them do whatever they want. Judging from their social media accounts and careers, Willow, 14, may be faring somewhat better than her brother Jaden, 16, who often tweets nonsensical bits of personal ‘wisdom’.

Both Jaden and Willow put out new music recently. (On the music front Willow is also ahead of her brother.) The thing is, it’s actually good, at least Willow’s music is, and Jaden’s isn’t as bad as it’s been to date. The tracks I heard from Willow were complex and listenable electronica. (They partnered with some good producers, although one of Jaden’s songs has been called out as derivative of another artist.)

That’s the thing about Will and Jada’s parenting style, it may have worked somewhat with Willow, but Jaden could probably use more boundaries. Maybe no one parenting style works for all children but the hands-off approach just seems like a disaster to me. It’s Scientology-based, and it seems to completely ignore children’s developmental needs.

Los Angeles World Premiere of Focus

The Los Angeles World Premiere of Warner Bros. Pictures’ “Focus.”

Los Angeles Premiere of "Focus"

Photo credit: WENN.com

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72 Responses to “Will Smith: ‘Jada and I like to give our kids complete responsibility’”

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  1. CharlotteCharlotte says:

    Con men? Scientology, check!
    Treating kids like adults? Scientology, check!

    • GoodNamesAllTaken says:

      Hey, you changed your name?

      • CharlotteCharlotte says:

        Another Charlotte sometimes posts and their opinions are usually contrary to my own (and quite often inflammatory). I decided to double down on my Charlotte-ness. Although, another poster had the lovely idea I should reference The Cure and go with ‘Charlotte Sometimes’. I’m always Charlotte, though, so I couldn’t.

      • GoodNamesAllTaken says:

        I like it. The other way was confusing.

      • CharlotteCharlotte says:

        Yes, I sometimes questioned if I was posting in my sleep. But the other Charlotte likes Miranda Kerr and at least two high profile scientologists, along with several other jarring differences, so I know she/he is not from my psyche.

    • Jayne says:

      To be fair he was asked about the Con Men so he didn’t bring up that word the interviewer did.

  2. Santia says:

    These kids could have done with more education, not necessarily boundaries. They seem hopelessly daft. Unfortunately (or fortunately?), with their money and parentage, they will never have to learn things the hard way.

    • Snazzy says:

      yes I’m with you on that. With a lot of hollywood (adults and kids) I find the issue to be a lack of education, coupled with a sense of entitlement and extreme wealth … a perfect recipe for randomly idiotic statements / behaviour

    • Josephine says:

      Yup. How is it taking responsibility to live off of the money, connections and fame of your folks? I’m not sure he understands what the word responsibility means.

    • KellyBee says:

      That’s not necessarily true look at celebrities like Justin B, Lindsay Lohan Drew Barrymore and so on who had no boundaries and no education and then look at celebrities like Dakota and Elle Fanning, Raven Symone, Emma Watson who all had involved parents who set boundaries and are educated.

    • JenniferJustice says:

      And we all know the most effective method of controlling others is to keep them ignorant.

      In a normal world the words “full responsibility” and “kids” should never be in the same sentence.

  3. Krastins says:

    Hmmm I wonder what Could possibly possess them to do this…*cough*CO$*cough*
    I think we may have secret scientologists here

    • CharlotteCharlotte says:

      There’s no secret. They won’t outright admit it, but their Co$ contributions are well documented. Including the Scientology school they opened a few years back (now closed).

  4. NewWester says:

    I am going to try and be positive. Hopefully Jaden and Willow are very wise teenagers who make the right choices in life. But with all the wealth and temptations there are in Hollywood I can see a rocky road for these two on their way to adulthood

  5. Hope says:

    God, I’m glad I didn’t have social media (except for myspace) when I was a teenager. The self-righteous, ignorant, idiotic $h!t that came out of my mouth would have been up on twitter for all to see. Their parents aren’t helping, but there is still time for them to grow out of their idiocy. At least they’re not using and boozing, right? I can think of a lot worse things for kids to be doing than going on quarter-baked rants about the metaphysical and thinking they have the answers to the universe. I know that doesn’t address Willow taking pics in bed with that man, but that’s another issue altogether.

    I don’t know guys, they just sound like typical self-involved teenagers who think they’re great because they’re discovering things for the first time and feel like they’re the first ones to think that way. Let’s give them a decade and see how it pans out.

  6. Cel says:

    Sounds to me like lazy non-parenting. I don’t care how mature you think your child/teenager is, they need boundaries and guidance.

  7. GoodNamesAllTaken says:

    Why not just give birth, buy the baby an apartment, hand it the keys and say “good luck, kid!” There’s a reason children have parents. The needs change as the child changes, but Jaden and Willow are still children, and they need their parent’s guidance. I think it’s heartbreaking. I try not to bring this up all the time, but as someone who would have given anything to have a child, I’ll never understand people who just throw their children in the trash. That’s what they’re doing. Because they’re rich and famous, their children won’t suffer the same physical consequences of neglected children who are also poor, such as starvation or lack of clothing, but I wonder how their emotional well-being will suffer. Teenagers need their parents as much as toddlers, just in a different way.

    • Snazzy says:

      Amen to that

    • Granger says:

      I totally agree, but then I think — nah, Will and Jada must be making some of this sh** up to sound like the world’s “coolest” parents. And then Will talks about his “artist’s mind,” that precludes him from performing such menial tasks as picking his clothes up off the floor, and I think, maybe they’re telling the truth. But without telling the WHOLE truth, of course — which is that they all have someone else doing all their menial tasks for them, leaving the four of them with nothing BUT time to pontificate on how much more advanced we’d all be if we just had someone to pick up our clothes for us and leave our minds to focus on important things, like which crappy movie we’re going to make next.

    • Peabody says:

      I’m so sorry to hear that GoodNamesAllTaken! I wish the best for you, whether that’s a bio baby or an adopted one ^_^

      • GoodNamesAllTaken says:

        Oh, thanks, Peabody, but it’s too late now. I am usually ok with it, but lately things have been setting me off.

  8. Lucy2 says:

    I think they’ve done such a disservice to those kids. All kids need some kind of boundaries, especially those growing up as they are- the Hollywood scene, the money, the early fame. And the lack of education is so sad considering they could’ve had the very best.

  9. Leah says:

    I wish he wasn’t into Scientology because I want to love him so much and then I remember. And it ruins him for me.

  10. Darkladi says:

    I was a deep philosopher when I was a teenager, too.

  11. Maya says:

    Parents are parents and children are children for a reason.

    Teenage years are the years parents have to set boundaries and make sure that the children don’t go off the rails.

    It’s so easy for the parents to say they are giving full responsibility to the children to choose their own lives. But there is a limit to what and what not the children can do.

    My parents raised us to be independent, make our own choices in education, allowed us to work part time to earn pocket money etc but they still set boundaries as to what we can do and what we cannot.

    • Lucy2 says:

      Completely agree, especially about the teenage years. That’s when a kid thinks they know everything but so painfully don’t and they need a good adult to guide them through.

  12. OriginalTessa says:

    I’m the kind of person that thinks everyone is fundamentally ok as long as they’re not into drugs, alcohol, destructive behavior (cutting, anorexia, any form of self harm, etc), or psychotic behavior that arms others. The Smith kids are setting off my future drug addict radar. They seem too eager for bigger things, and people who are dissatisfied with regular life try to amp it up during party life. If I were Will, I would keep my eyes on them. They’re children.

    • KellyBee says:

      There have been more than one occasion were Jaden posted a video or at an event where he talking jiberish, can barely keep his eyes open and looks completely out of it. Many people including myself have wondered if he on some thing.

    • lucy2 says:

      You’re not wrong. Aren’t they always talking about how bored they are, even though they have everything? And wasn’t Jaden running around with Bieber for a while?
      And given Will’s parenting philosophy of them having to figure it out for themselves, let’s hope it never gets so bad that they can’t come back from it.

  13. Megan says:

    ok he isn’t wrong about the lump on the head thing. I mean you learn a lot quicker not to touch a hot stove by doing it once then by being told not to its hot, right? Now that isn’t to say a parent shouldn’t say don’t touch that its hot, but you’re going to learn what that means by doing it one time. That is the reality.

    • Josephine says:

      Not sure these kids will ever feel any lumps in their privileged, protected little worlds. That’s the irony of his ridiculous little speech. He may be correct in theory, but the reality for these kids is that they live in a cocoon of privilege and wealth and it shows. They can’t even be responsible enough to get an education.

      • Debbie says:

        Well the education thing is on the parents they really don’t have a choice. But even in privilege they will feel lumps. Just because they are blessed doesn’t mean bad things won’t happen. And they have to learn from them like everyone else. They admitadly have a softer net

    • Eh, plenty of us can learn by observing others. If we all had to experience everything, the human race would be extinct by now.

  14. MrsBPitt says:

    And again, another movie with an older man and a young girl…Will is 46, Magot Robbie is 24!!!! C’mon, Hollywood, can’t you ever pair a romantic couple in a movie, where a 46 year old man is attracted to a 46 year old woman???? Jennifer Anniston, Cameron Diaz, Halle Berry, Naomie Watts, Kate Beckinsdale, etc…all hot, and all in their 40’s…

    • lucy2 says:

      Yes – I was just discussing this movie with a few friends last night, and we were saying it didn’t look bad, but it bothered us that she is pretty much half his age.

  15. Micki says:

    …”I have that artist’s mind………and I don’t really care a lot about clothes. I take my clothes off and drop them. I don’t clean up stuff.”
    Hey, my husband is an artist in disguise too, I’ve always wondered….

    As for parenting, I think the key is having some common sense. There are dangers when parents want to remove every bump on the road. Many helicopter children still rely on their parents in their 30’s and even 40’s. I read more often articles about parents meetings at the unis!! when children “decide” what to study. Unthinkable when I was a student.

    On the other side leaving my children without guidance and advice results in mental overload and anxiety about problems that they are too young to deal with.
    I am all for “having first-hand experience” but do not agree that children should not learn something by observing. I prefer they visit drug addicts’ clinic instead of “experimenting with drugs” themselves. Or I’d rather have them go and see orphan asylum before I start lecruting them about their responsibility towards their girlfriends.
    A school in Karlsruhe had some classes visit a slaughterhouse. It HAD an effect.
    Some may argue that these examples are not for the faint-hearted but life is not either.

  16. kri says:

    I often wonder if maybe Will and Jada simply popped in a DVD od The Matrix and plopped Jaden in front of it in his toddler chair, and this is the result? He sounds like discarded lines from those films. Co$ =scary.

  17. yep says:

    Im here to tell you that this kind of “parenting” doesnt work. I did it. And the consequences were devestating.
    The thought that your child can cherry pick what they want to do, and encourage that, is wrong.
    And Im not talking about sports or musical desires the child wants to do.

    Im talking about this “free will and free reign” mentality of parents in regards to their child.
    It honestly doesnt work. I know this.
    You will have unleashed an adult onto this world devoid of empathy, who is narcissistic, entitled, smug. Little acts of charity will be blown out of proportion, as its ” look at me! ” and in reality not for the recipient.
    I wish I had known this way back when. Im sorry , world. I truly am.

  18. Beckysuz says:

    That is just a mess of stupidity. Children need rules and boundaries. I used to really like Will Smith. Scientology really ruined him

  19. chaine says:

    “Being a responsible parent is difficult, so Jada and I like to avoid actually doing it.”

  20. Ginger says:

    Eh. He’s stereotyping artists. I have a creative artists mind as well but that extends to my environment and what I put on my body too. I like an organized, clean space that doesn’t stress me out. I enjoy decorating very much. I also love a great outfit! Clothes are meant to be fun. I know a lot of people make the argument that creative types are cluttery and space cadets but that’s not always true. And I know from my own experience when my parents had loose boundaries for my brother and I that it’s not always a good thing. We were given too much responsibility at a too young of an age. I don’t hold it against them but I do raise my son (who will be a teen in a few months) with far more boundaries than I had.

    • Erinn says:

      Yeah, I’m in between. I understand my organized clutter – and I’ll let things get pretty damn messy. But then a switch goes off and I start cleaning and love it. My desk at work can look messier than it is, just because I scatter papers that I use often around. It takes 20 seconds to clean my desk when I have to though, because it’s just paper or the odd thing like that. But I’ve ALWAYS had a messy bedroom, and always would get so man growing up if my mom went and tried to organize anything because the clutter made sense to me. But when I start cleaning – I feel great, and I enjoy the look of the neat and tidy best. I just tend to be so focused on other things that after a while I’m like “holy shit, what happened?!” and then go on the war path against clutter.

  21. Ruyana says:

    Will, that’s just a really fancy way of saying you can’t be bothered to be a father to your kids.

  22. Stef Leppard says:

    NEWSFLASH, SMITHS: Children crave boundaries! It is unhealthy not to give a child structure and rules. You don’t have to fight with your child or squash their creativity or growth in any way in order to accomplish this.

    • MC2 says:

      I totally agree- even at a young age I recognized that. My mom had NO rules while my dad had them. I honestly felt while growing up that my mom didn’t give a crap about me. I enjoyed a semblance of order & attention at my dad’s.

  23. mj says:

    Chiming in to say I hate her character–or at least how Jada plays her–on Gotham. I know, I know, a lot of people loathe that show, period. But Fish is soooo overdone.

  24. MC2 says:

    Jaden Smith reminds me of a character from “Best in Show”. She was super deep too. “We have a lot in common…..we like to eat soup or not eat soup…..we like to talk or not talk”.

  25. JenniferJustice says:

    How come Travolta and Cruise have their supposed “demons” audited out but Will is allowed to be a ho dog? Inquiring minds want to know.

  26. rudy says:

    Will and Jada are $cientologists.

    They are backing a cult that steals, abuses and murders parishioners.
    A cult that separates families.
    A cult that abandons children.

    Will and Jada need to be accountable for what they support.
    Their insistence on staying with $cientology is reprehensible and disgusting.

    I will NEVER EVER believe or support anything this couple says until they leave this very dangerous and violent cult.

  27. jwoolman says:

    When you talk about the Smith kids’ music, you’re really talking about the people hired to do it all for them. Daddy bought it all for the kids, along with “acting careers”. Today, a good engineer could make my cat with the raspy voice sound like an opera singer. Daddy didn’t do right by either of his kids. They may never know what they are really capable of or what would really have provided a satisfying life, because Daddy didn’t let them find out.

  28. MC2 says:

    The scariest part is these two backed or helped a private school that was privately teaching CO$ crap. Mess with your own kids but leave others alone. Man- I used to LOVE Will Smith. Sad…

  29. serena says:

    Neverthless I still like Will, what can I do? He’s so sexy and wins my heart with just a laugh/joke. For sure his and Jada’s parental style SUCKS. But I’m not (too) worried for Willow, because I think she’ll do well and is a capable young girl despite being so much into that Scientology crap.
    But god, Jaden seems like an idiot.

  30. Ankhel says:

    Take that, all you suckers who thought having kids meant you had to do some growing up!

  31. Lauren says:

    Kids have their whole lives to makes their own choices. Least you can do is guide them and help them make them when they are young. It’s just lazy parenting.
    My parents were like that. I never felt like they cared about me. Didn’t matter when I came home, never had to do any chores, they didn’t blink when at 13 I had a 17 year old boyfriend. I was truly jealous of the over-protective parents my friends had. I’m lucky I had enough wisdom already to not do stupid things like unsafe sex or drugs.

  32. Grace says:

    Interesting interview. I guess I and the rest of my friends have an artist mind too – we lose our keys, wallet and just about everything else not tied to the ground. And every 15 year old boy is an artist too – they never pick after themselves.

    Dude you are old and lazy, fess up.

  33. Kim1 says:

    I have no problem with how they raise their kids Tom Cruise raised two children who to my knowledge have never been in trouble.Will’s son who spent half his time with Will and Jada has never been in trouble.
    Tom Hanks and Rita raised their son with strict rules yet he has been in and out of rehab.
    I was raised by lenient parents .I have never used drugs or committed a crime.Most of my cousins had strict parents , most have used drugs or been locked up.There is not only way to parent happy, kind, successful kids.

  34. Amanda says:

    I wish I had been raised with a few more boundaries. My parents were always there for me and my brother, but didn’t enforce any rules. Because of this, my brother stopped doing his homework and dropped out of high school.

  35. DaysAndNightsOnAir says:

    Will Smith said they gave the children as much responsibility as they can handle. That would be a rather modern and generally well-approved parenting style. It helps children becoming very responsible. Good thing.
    Of course the question is wheather the Smith’ are giving their children too much responsibility. I remember those pics of Willow in bed with an older guy about a year ago. It was reported that they were just friends and that nothing had happened. Jada received much criticism for that. And at that point I thought it was deserved criticism.