Zayn Malik is about to embark on his first solo tour. In honor of this milestone, Glamour decided to ask Zayn a series of “first” questions. I know that his freshman solo effort, Mind of Mine, was met with both critical and commercial success. I know that he is one half of a very hot couple with Gigi Hadid, with whom he spilt for the briefest of moments. I also know that he had one of my favorite looks at the Met Gala this year. Other than these, a few skirmishes on Twitter and punking us all with a possible face tattoo, that’s pretty much all I know about Zayn. So when I went into this Glamour article, I was fairly open-minded. I can’t say that’s how I came out of it. You can read all his answers here, but below are a few:
First person you let hear your new album? Myself!
First celeb crush? Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. They’re the same, right?
First concert you went to? Not telling.
First job? Singing in One Direction.
First thing you like to do after a performance? Pay homage to Bob Marley.
First time you realized you wanted to break off from 1D and go off on your own? An alien spoke to me in a dream….
Wow. OK. First time you really felt like an adult? Just yesterday.
First thing on your bucket list? I want to invent something.
First failure? Wearing pastel colors.
First big splurge? I bought a house in Los Angeles.
First place you would travel to if you had a chopper in your backyard right now? Jamaica.
First thing you do when you’re with old friends? We do this weird thing: We communicate with words.
How novel! First time you realized you’d made it as a musician? Have I made it? That’s cool.
I feel like this was supposed to be a fun little fluff piece and Zayn made the interviewer work too hard for what amounts to contrived blasé answers. Most outlets are going nuts with the Alien-told-me-to-leave 1D response but I am fairly certain that was just his “clever” way to blow off a question he didn’t want to answer. Besides, if an alien came to him in a dream to mention he should leave the band, why would he take it seriously? Maybe it was an alien sent to derail his career.
As a complement to this Q&A, Zayn has a new Tumblr. So far, it consists of his name in huge static letters while a series of artistic versions of him scroll in the background. The first is a collection of MRI scans that may or may not be of his own brain – although he would’ve had to pull his head out of his ass first before getting in the machine. Here is his Tumblr announcement:
https://t.co/Z33CCTHJxK pic.twitter.com/pCikdH9DAu
— zayn (@zaynmalik) July 12, 2016
Arty Tumblr is Arty. Zayn might also be branching out into fashion. Now this I can get on board with – I do like how he dresses.
Photo credit: WENN Photos and Twitter
Hey! That’s the same reason I left.
I mean it’s a good thing he’s pretty because that boy is so damn far up his own ass ….
My thoughts exactly
an alien spoke to me in a dream and told me he’s nuts.
Who spoke to him and told him to wear that shirt?
If he didn’t want to do the interview maybe he should’ve passed? Some of those answers were rude.
He’s British. Their humor can be very sarcastic/droll in a way that some Americans have trouble understanding. See: early Beatles interview answers.
Also, from this interview, I’m guessing this boy likes to smoke the Ganja.
What if he wasn’t British, what would these answers be considered then?
No I get that. Like the pastel thing was funny. The whole “we use words” thing felt unnecessarily snarky though, and I just got the vibe that throughout the whole interview he was bored so why do it. Doesn’t net him any significant increase in publicity that I can see.
And sometimes someone is just being a jerk because he may be something of a petulant child who thinks he’s too much of an artist for these silly questions.
No, this is an obnoxious jerk acting as such. But how predictable or you to excuse it by blaming those peabrained Yanks for being too doltish to “get it”.
BTW, I’ve lived on three continents-it’s certainly not just Americans who are wise to this fact (though you do seem to be fixated on us, for whatever reason).
This is not British humour. This is bratty snark. He takes himself waaay too seriously.
I’m aware of British humor and I don’t think that’s what this was at all…I still think he was being a jerk. It sounds like he was sitting there playing on his phone giving the interviewer snide/sarcastic responses.
I don’t think he was being dry and sarcastic ‘British’ either, I think he was being a turd.
LOL I love him but he is so utterly ridiculous!, His cd still Fire Though!! zero irony
Here we go…. The noms are in: Hiddles is nominated. Let the games begin! Wheeeeeee! Lol
Lead Actor in a Limited Series or Movie
Bryan Cranston
Benedict Cumberbatch
Idris Elba
Cuba Gooding Jr.
Tom Hiddleston
Courtney B. Vance
He won’t win but, that was a huge honor and in a way a win for him just being nominated. I’m happy for his fans.
(Bryan Cranston will win- if the LA vibe of being obsessed with his talent still holds.)
Why is this mr swift stuff posted in this post? Can we keep that grandpa out of beautiful Zayns thread pretty please?
I suspect the alien’s name rhymes with hugs. And with his anxiety problems, how is a solo tour going to work? Didn’t he cancel some huge performance in England because he was too anxious to perform?
That was the day after Grimmie was killed. That probably had a hand in it, probably why no one really was angry at him over it.
Went in with an open mind, came out thinking he sounded pretentious and annoying.
I’m so happy his solo career is falling on it’s backside.
My only thoughts on this interview is that it is very douchey. To me, he came off as very sarcastic when it really wasn’t that serious. Kid still has some growing up to do.
Exactly.
Drugs are bad kids, drugs are bad. Just say no.
If that’s drugs then I want some of what he’s smoking because he looks amazing.
The alien answer is definitely a joke. Can tell. Am British. People always think I mean stuff when I don’t. This could mean that I have a superior sense of humour. Or it could mean that my sense of humour is utter poo-poo. Pick your favourite.
What a tit.
I used to edit a puff feature in which a certain set of professionals were interviewed with format questions. It was a barely disguised opportunity for them to promote themselves. You wouldn’t believe how many people are fools who want to be clever with this sort of thing rather than actually INTEREST people in themselves as a product/service/whatever they’re selling.
I agree. Give an honest answer or at least try to be polite. I’m sure no one held a gun to his head and forced him to do an interview with glamour, you could tell in responses the interview was getting sick of him too; “Wow. Ok.”,”How novel!” It must be so awkward to be a journalist interviewing someone for work and them giving you one-liner, mostly sarcasm answers like they don’t want to be there when you’re just trying to do your job.
Of course it’s a joke. I don’t care if he’s a tit he’s just so beautiful lol! Anyways I think he’s fed up with fluff and stupid promo after 5 years in 1D.
Meh, if he is tired of fluff pieces and being adored while having very little talent he could always try doing something of substance.
And yet everyone gets sooo angry and confused here after a few years why their fav celebs start talking and acting like a-holes lol!
I agree that he is ridiculously pretty.
I also agree that if he does an interview, it is the act of a tit to use it to reputational disadvantage. This would seem to negate the point of agreeing to do the bloody thing in the first place.
These noodles live in a bubble, don’t they?
LOL sorry, Sixer, I gave a similar answer to yours. I must work on my bad habit of responding before reading through the earlier replies.
No worries. I don’t know about you, but I’m so thick I need to repeat read to take anything in anyway!
The epitome of “too much, too young”.
Bet it looked liked Taylor Swift.
*pay homage to Bob Marley* idiot.
God he is just so pretty. But what an awful interview lol.
He’s messing about but Tbh hes so incredibly hot! He can say whatever he likes!😜
He is not a well boy
He needs to go home to his mum
Dang, that man has pretty eyes.
He’s prettier than his girlfriend Gigi.
At first I thought he was really good looking. Now he’s just a short, scrawny full-of himself arrogant douche-bag with a Teresa Giudice fore-head. He’ll be a flash in the pan, gone five years from now. I don’t see longevity in his future with his current attitude.
British humour people! I don’t really really get why grown women would dislike him so much that they would wish him bad luck in life. I am a few years older than him and he reminds me of my little brother. Annoying, too cool for school, but also vulnerable and shy. I find it hard not to root for him, of course it does help that he is ridiculously pretty too.
LOL! Give it a rest with the stupid British humor already! People gave “OMG u guise! #Canadianhumor” passes on Bieber when he was younger and cuter too. Now surprise surprise; he’s an entitled douche from years of having his butt kissed and the “b-but he’s #pretty” excuses thrown out as soon as he did something wrong. Someone better tell Zayn more people in H-wood have proven the age old saying, “pretty doesn’t age well” over the years than not. He might want to start working on adjusting his attitude for when he ages, that young ex-boybander pretty fades, and everyone suddenly becomes less forgiving… Or we could just wait and watch his confusion and bewilderment when people actually start to come for him after years of excuses like Bieber’s was.
Umm… “Canadian humor”????!!!! BwaHahahahaha! Never heard of it. Canadians are thought sweet or polite but, there’s not some general consensus, or its equivalent, of them being funny.
Yup, the transparency of it all made it even more stupid. But it worked in hand with the “but he cute y’all!” excuse and got the “ha8erz” to leave him alone whenever he f’ed up and look how he acts now. Everyone likes to reminding others that celebs are normal people, you wouldn’t give a normal person pass after pass to continue being a jerk to others because they look cute. And we still wonder why so many crash and burn when they grow up after years of false (and rather sycophantic) protection from everything they do…That and the Larry phenomenon should definitely go in some psych books!
Well i am british so i think i know what the humour of my country is. I don’t know anything about bieber vs Canadian humour so i am not going to speak on that. 😉
Mira, as a fellow Brit, I fail to see how his answer to the second to last question could be seen as anything less than insolent.
Some of the responses strike me some of that Britishy sarcasm coming through, but some of them are also clearly just a young person acting like he’s too cool for everything. Which, now that I’m older, always serves as a signal to me that somebody’s using arrogance to cover insecurity. He’s certainly handsome and talented, but he’s got some growing to do, that’s for sure.
Most reasonable and insightful response on here.
*sips tea* I never cared for him, I just thought he had a nice face. The other band mates were always putting in the effort for interviews so if this is the type of interview he gives, it was for good reason…
EDIT: the brit sarcasm excuse I completely understand BUT, this interview just gave off the impression that he felt “too good” to be interviewed, i dunno, kinda like the interviewer didn’t deserve his time.
I read it as he and his friends “communicate with words” – meaning instead of being glued to their phones the entire time, as a lot of people his age do. Though hopefully he will learn a touch of graciousness as he continues to embark on this solo career….
It was obviously a joke. Why are people taking this particular point so seriously? It was a rapid fire q&a. He’s suppose to say the first thing that comes to mind.
In the future, he should just have his picture taken and skip the words altogether. No one expects Gigi to talk. Why is it important that Zayn talk? He’d be happier if he didn’t and so would we all.