Was Catherine Zeta-Jones drunk in a video promoting her eye pencil?

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As CB and Kaiser have covered, Catherine Zeta-Jones is leaning heavily into her promotion for her Casa Zeta Jones lifestyle brand. Her latest Casa ZJ (why didn’t she name it that?) is a beauty arm of her proposed empire. Monday, Catherine got so excited about her new eye pencil, she couldn’t wait to show it off. So she and her overworked smokey eyes filmed a guerrilla teaser for Instagram. Many on the internet are wondering if CZJ had a little liquid courage before posting this.

Catherine is certainly relaxed here. Maybe I’m just a sloppier drunk but I’m not getting a wine waft as much an Eau de Xanax vibe. Regardless of what got her here, I’m just glad she came. I do have questions, though. Was holding the pencil upside down a design choice? Or was moving it quickly supposed to make us watch repeatedly? Who choose the angle to film this, her Maltipoo? Speaking of her pup, Taylor – is that who directed Catherine’s hair in the clip? Does this “perfect smokey eye pencil” come with detailed instructions? Because at this point, my only hope to obtain a smokey look is to have someone actually blow smoke in my eye and hope my mascara runs. Lastly, why does one need a perfect smokey eye to “go to the kitchen to cook?” Is that why my bechamel was lumpy the other night, because I hadn’t lined my underlid? Jacques Pepin left that out of the recipe.

Maybe the next ad campaign could be Catherine having a glass or four of wine and actually applying the makeup – then we’ll see how well this stuff performs. Or show the after when she’s done cooking, how quickly does that look go from flawless to Alice Cooper? People are questioning how her ad team let her put – and keep – this video up but I’ll bet they are already planning their next one, “When’s CZJ’s birthday? Send over a case of champagne and some lip pens and see what kind of painted masterpiece we get.”

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Photo credit: Instagram

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29 Responses to “Was Catherine Zeta-Jones drunk in a video promoting her eye pencil?”

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  1. AppleTartin says:

    She looks good for a woman that may or not be 10 years older than she says she is. But i’m so burnt out on all this celeb cash in on makeup brands.

  2. Sojaschnitzel says:

    We need more posts by Hecate. This is too funny :D

  3. tealily says:

    I don’t know, she seems fine here to me. I’d guess I’m probably in the minority though.

    • Yup, Me says:

      I agree. She sounds fine.

      • Kosmos says:

        She’s overdoing it as a kind of joke. I don’t get any drunk vibes. She’s just trying to sound ‘smoky’ to blend with her smoky eye pencil…..but I agree, I am getting sick of celebs and their makeup lines ugh…..

  4. Mina_Esq says:

    CZJ is very beautiful, but she’s not exactly “makeup goals”.

  5. molly says:

    “Eau de Xanax” is exactly the correct answer. ha.

  6. Slowdown says:

    She doesn’t look plastered, just very dumb to have posted such a silly video that almost puts her at our level – the pedestrians who don’t have a team to glam up photos and videos and “need” make up.

    Very very funny post btw!

    On another note, she doesn’t look aspirational as she’s always looked older than she is. She has a very thin, papery kind of skin that doesn’t do her favors in the age department. It‘a not her fault (if one sets surgery aside), it’s just genes.

  7. Nana says:

    Whatever gets you through the pandemic…..
    cheeeeers CZJ!

  8. Yellowrocket says:

    She has bipolar disorder, it’s notoriously difficult to medicate. She might just be taking her prescribed meds. Hope she’s healthy I love CZJ

  9. Grant says:

    Something nice about CZJ. I saw her when she was on Broadway in “A Little Night Music” over a decade ago. She was at the height of her career–I think she had just won her Oscar for Chicago a few years earlier. Anyway, after the show the actors all left through a side exit with fans flanked on either side, as is tradition. It was the middle of December and CZJ came outside in this glamorous black fur coat and stiletto boots. She is tall and was breathtakingly beautiful in person. Obviously there were throngs of people going berserk. I expected her to ignore everyone and hop into her car and drive off. I kid you not, she stayed and signed autographs and took pictures with every last person despite the chilly winter night before sliding into her black limo and riding off into the night. I think she later won a Tony for that role and I couldn’t have been happier for her because she was great in the show, but also because of her humility and kindness which, to be frank, I was not expecting.

  10. Chaine says:

    She’s not showing us how to give ourselves a smoky eye because she has a makeup person to do it for her. Buy her expensive cosmetics, or buy something cheap from the drugstore, your results at home will probably be about the same either way.

  11. Sorella says:

    I loved her so much when she was young in the British show “Darling Buds of May”. I don’t get drunk vibes. I get more “this is me doing my sexy voice” vibes.

    I too am tired of celebs selling us stuff, I rarely feel the need to buy it because a star is selling it. Or influencers, I cannot believe the number of people follow their every purchase like it is gospel!

  12. Mar says:

    She is about the same age as J-lo or very close.

  13. Kkat says:

    She’s bipolar (as am I) so probably more Ativan for the anxiety. Thats what I use for my breakthrough stuff. I’m bipolar I, II and mixed episode.
    Ativan is great for my occasional mixed episode breakthroughs.
    My kids call it my “bitch be gone” pill

    • TaraBest says:

      @Kkat, Your kids’ name for Ativan made me laugh out loud!

    • Hecate says:

      First of all, thank you to everyone for being so kind.

      @Kkat – I am interested in your thoughts here. My dr. just prescribed me Ativan instead of Xanax and I’ve been terrified of taking it, to the point that when I had an episode a few weeks ago, I took and expired Xanax instead. But you prefer it over Xanax? I’m bipolar 2 and generally don’t medicate, but I have it on hand when it gets beyond my control. Can you tell me why you like Ativan better? Briefly, I don’t want to pry too much