Alice Evans claims her ex Ioan Gruffudd has ‘ghosted’ her for nine months

Actor Ioan Gruffudd and wife actress Alice Evans arrive at the 'San Andreas' - Los Angeles Premiere at TCL Chinese Theatre IMAX in Hollywood

In January this year, Alice Evans dramatically (melodramatically) announced that she and Ioan Gruffudd were separating and that he had asked for a divorce. What followed was weeks and months of Alice dumping out her purse on social media and accusing her estranged husband of all kinds of terrible things. You would have thought that she was the first woman to ever get divorced. I’m not trying to be cruel – I’m sure she was genuinely devastated and heartbroken. But she inadvertently revealed why her husband was leaving her by being so extra, so contemptuous, so over-the-top on social media. Ioan ended up filing for divorce in March, and then there was another flurry of drama, but things have been relatively quietly since the summer. And now this.

Calling him out. Alice Evans put her estranged husband, Ioan Gruffudd, on blast in a lengthy Twitter rant, accusing him of refusing to communicate with her amid their divorce.

The Vampire Diaries alum, 50, posted a screenshot of a message via Twitter on Tuesday, October 12, that the Fantastic Four star, 48, allegedly sent her on Saturday, October 9. “I have just had a FaceTime with [daughter] Elsie this Saturday morning (evening with me here in France),” he allegedly wrote. “My time with Elsie was commandeered by you.”

The correspondence went on to suggest that subsequent conversations only take place on the coparenting app OurFamilyWizard: “In the future, if you wish to discuss Elise’s [sic] education or learning needs, please ensure you make arrangements with me through the wizard to discuss such matters. You and I had agreed many months ago to use the wizard as means of communication. Please let me have my time with the children and if you wish to discuss anything with me about them, please use the wizard.”

Evans responded in a series of tweets on Tuesday. “I don’t care that I’m sharing this,” she noted. “’My time with Elsie was ‘commandeered’ by you’? I haven’t spoken to my husband in 9 months (his choice) Elsie is breaking down. School grades in freewill. I was desperate to get his opinion so I DARED to lean in while she was talking to him. I did my fair share of crying, screaming, accusing. I begged and begged for at least some sort of running discussion, for the kids [sic] sake. That’s my way of reacting to such a life-changing event. So he ghosted me. I have been ghosted for almost 10 months now.”

[From Us Weekly]

From what I can understand, their daughter was FaceTime-ing with her father and Alice barged into it and tried to talk to her ex and he sent her a curt email about it. And clearly, they’re communicating via the family schedule app, and I would assume they’re also communicating via their lawyers. While I don’t doubt that she has legitimate grievances – and she enumerates them on social media – if I had to deal with her and her social media confessions, I would ghost her too. I would ice her out.

Premiere of 'San Andreas' - Arrivals

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, WENN.

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120 Responses to “Alice Evans claims her ex Ioan Gruffudd has ‘ghosted’ her for nine months”

  1. Twin falls says:

    Whoa. That poor child.

  2. Livethelifeaquatic says:

    I am going to side with him on this one. That is totally inappropriate for her to butt in on his FaceTime call with their daughter. That’s their time together. Plus, they shouldn’t be discussing those things in front of the daughter. Obviously there are many reasons why they both agreed to communicate via writing within a parenting time app.

    I divorced my narcissistic ex husband over a year ago and there are many red flags here.

    Don’t know which one of them is the narcissist, maybe both… but anyway

    parenting time, even if it’s via face time, is for the kid and parent. Let the other parent do their thing. The kid will figure out if one of them is toxic eventually. It’s toxic to interfere. I’ve had to hold my tongue on several occasions and just let my child’s dad show his true colors. He is still her father and I explain to her that he loves her the only way he knows how…

    Leave it be. This woman needs some self control and respect. She could have easily emailed him within the app and discussed her concerns there instead of barging in and … yes commandeering is a great word.:::during what was supposed to be her daughters time time… kids don’t need to be involved in these convos

    • Say it louder for the people in the back 👏👏
      I initially felt very bad for her, assuming she got dumped by her narcissistic husband. But her behavior with the kids is appalling and I do not blame him at all for running away. The other week she made a comment about “hopefully she doesn’t get his nose” or something like that as a caption with her daughters picture.

      • LillyfromLillooet says:

        +1.
        He has cause to prove that her publicly calling him out is meant to have a negative effect on his career, via harming his reputation which will naturally affect roles, and then yeah, career earnings. The only blessing here is that his note shows him to be civil, sane, and trying to abide by their agreement.

        She’s looking like a good candidate for a restraining order.

    • MarcelMarcel says:

      ITA. One of the things I admire about my mum is she never badmouthed my biological father when I was a kid. He left before I was born. Maybe she did vent with her friends but never to me. And she made sure I knew he left because of his own issues not because of me.

      That meant I could form my own relationship with him when he contacted her in my teens. I’m so grateful that she created space for that.

      My mama thinks kids are smart and they can realise what the truth about the other parent in their own time. Complaining about the other parent just makes the kid feel bad.

      Obviously it’s more nuanced if your ex partner is abusive and your kid needs context for that.

      At the end of the day I know which parent would go to the ends of the earth for me. It’s a cliché but actions do speak louder than words.

      I don’t know if I’d have the strength of character in the same position because I don’t have kids. But I have so much respect for my mama.

    • NotSoSocialButterfly says:

      And for her to do that is incredibly manipulative. Admitting to screaming, crying, yelling at her spouse in front of her children, probably about their children)? She should not be able to do this to the children.

    • Kate says:

      Yes. What I see here is he is doing yellow rock – when you are polite and detached in communicating with a narcissist and do not engage with their attempts to draw you into the drama. Because he is not engaging with her she is upping her manipulations by making their private conversations public to embarrass him, gain public sympathy and paint him as cold and callous. It’s perfectly reasonable in a contentious divorce situation to agree to a system of written communication regarding co-parenting, especially if one parent is likely to “forget” or gaslight the other.

      • Agreatreckoning says:

        Agree. I used to know someone like this. You felt bad for them at first and then noticed that they would overshare with anyone who would listen and post things on social media that were eyebrow raising while the other parent tried to maintain a sense of polite communication. By the time her 3rd divorce came around (4 children involved), people just kept their distance from her. She’s not doing herself any favors or acting in the best interest of the children.

      • PinkestSlip says:

        Well said, @Kate: this woman has major issues, and she’s using him to project them, using him to project those issues into the greater public social media forum. What a waste of space…

    • Christina says:

      My ex was like this. He was worse, so I have. 99 year restraining order.

      She needs to chill or she is going to lose access to her children.

  3. JEM says:

    My god, she is messy. If I was her divorce attorney I would personally cut off her internet access.

    • Persephone says:

      Agreed. She seems exhausting.

    • Yup, Me says:

      Messy and toxic. One would hope she’d learned something after the last time she showed her entire ass all over social media.

      It seems someone said SOME thing to her, which is why she starts her post saying “I don’t care that I’m sharing this.”

      Her posts are not having the effect she means for them to have.

  4. Rose says:

    When I filed my lawyer’s first words were to keep everything off social media. Deactivate Facebook, Twitter, everything.

    This is why.

    She’s going to shoot herself in both feet when the judge sees all this. And if my lawyer could write an anti defamation clause in MY (unknown, not a celebrity) contract, Ioan’s will definitely write it in his.

    • Still_Sarah says:

      @ Rose. Exactly – keep it off social media and email. I went into court and had pages of what the judge called “crazy, stupid emails” to my client from her ex. The judge was not impressed.

  5. Merricat says:

    She is a piece of work.

    • L4frimaire says:

      Seems like a really unpleasant person. I don’t know anything about him apart from his roles, and don’t need to know more. Don’t know why she’s putting this all out here. How does it benefit her?

  6. lucy2 says:

    Oh man, this woman and her need to make everything public! How on earth does she feel that will help her in any way?
    I feel so badly for their children.

    • NotSoSocialButterfly says:

      Seriously. Rehashing this 9 months later, so publicly? I’m beginning to think he’s grey rocking her for a valid reason.

      • johnny says:

        she is actually not rehashing it. She has not really stopped ever since then. A few weeks ago she even basically revealed the contents of their prenup and how incredible unfair it is and how he made her believe when they married that it’s to protect her, but then she claimed recently that she never signed this particular prenup he presented. She is full of shit.

      • NotSoSocialButterfly says:

        @johnny,
        Well that makes it *even worse* than. I stand by the heart of my comment.

  7. BlinkB says:

    I’ve been following this since earlier this year, and I feel for her. I personally wouldn’t choose to express myself in the way she has on SM, especially with kids involved, but it’s clear she is desperate, and his behaviour has pushed over the edge. He sounds like a cold, gaslighting b*st*rd. I don’t agree with her method, but she has my empathy and sympathy.

    • Fortuona says:

      Why is he a b#st#rd ?
      He is doing the divorce through his lawyers and the App which is how they supposed to communicate not face to face and I am pretty sure that is what he was told to do

      And what exactly was his ‘bad behaviour ‘ , his not existant affair whih his co-worker or his sexual abuse of the kids that she claimed

      He asked for a divorce a year ago not matter how many times she tries to change the story as she went of first rant back then

      • NotSoSocialButterfly says:

        This. She is the manipulator and gaslighter, it appears to me… regardless of unhappiness and affairs previously (which would be totally shitty, but man, don’t use your kids as pawns against your spouse. It just hurts the kids.

      • Malificent says:

        And if he had actually sexually abused their kids, wouldn’t she be relieved that he wanted to spend minimal time with them? Wouldn’t you want to limit your kids’ contact with their abuser as much as you could while you were trying to get legal protections put in place for them?

        For all we know, he’s a real piece of work too. But we don’t know because he’s not airing his every opinion in public. They’re getting divorced — he gets to ghost her if he wants beyond the communication required to co-parent. It’s not a best case scenario — but it’s pretty clear that even a mediocre scenario is probably not doable with her oversharing.

      • Nanny to the Rescue says:

        She is claiming he sexually abused their daughters?
        Then why the hell is he divorcing her, why didn’t she divorce him and call the police and all that?

        There’s no version of this story where she doesn’t come off as crazy.

    • Stef says:

      This!

      I agree completely. They’re both coming across as terrible here and it’s the children who pay the ultimate price.

    • Kate says:

      I feel for anyone whose spouse asks for a divorce. I get that it has to be a life-altering, incredibly traumatic experience and that one’s first instinct is likely to be trying to make it not happen. And then the second instinct is to hurt that person back. I get it, but I don’t think it’s right to do and say literally anything to manipulate and hurt someone who has hurt you – which is what she has been blatantly doing. Especially when you are responsible for young children who are also going through a life-defining and traumatic experience and only have their parents (and not the benefit of age, experience and maturity) to guide them through it. She needs to find someone (a therapist, a life coach) to help her cope. I bunch of “likes” and “you go girl” from strangers on the internet is not it.

    • whatWHAT? says:

      “but it’s clear she is desperate, and his behaviour has pushed over the edge.”

      then she should seek therapy, not blast him on social media and further harm/alienate her children. I have empathy for her in the sense that her marriage is ending and she didn’t want that. her emotional state can garner sympathy, but her behavior does not.

      PS, his “behavior” is exactly in line with what his lawyers are telling him to do. he is not mistreating her OR their children. he is simply NOT communicating with her DIRECTLY (face to face or phone), and that is his prerogative. he doesn’t have to have direct contact with her as long as he’s fulfilling his role as a father. and if she doesn’t like that, too bad so sad but he doesn’t owe her anything.

      • Twin falls says:

        then she should seek therapy,

        This all day. You can be extremely wounded by a toxic partner and still realize that you need to seek help to heal. Instead she’s doubling down on her hurt and creating a her own toxic environment for her child.

    • GrnieWnie says:

      what gets me is no matter his behavior, there’s simply NO need to put all of this into the public eye. Whose approval is she looking for here? Whose validation? Why? It’s so messy and it’s harmful! It’s harmful to the children and it’s definitely harmful to her. It shows that she lacks respect and boundaries.

      This is exactly how my mom behaved with her divorces. It burnt bridges with a lot of her children once they became adults. Believe it or not, your drama is not the centre of the universe. There are children with needs who don’t need to bear the weight of your issues and conflicts.

      • Yup, Me says:

        EXACTLY.

        This is also how you know she doesn’t have any damn friends (which is also a red flag, imo). This is the kind of stuff you share with them and with your therapist- your support system. NOT in front of your kids and not with the entire damn world.

        And if her daughter’s grades are in freeFALL, it’s probably no thanks to the emotional child running their household, telling ALL their business on the interwebs and busting in on her conversations with her father.

    • Amy Too says:

      I think she is/was just way more into him than he was to her. She seems to have thought this was a big, passionate, love match of your life relationship and she seems shocked that he just broke up with her. Maybe he wasn’t communicating with her about what wasn’t working for him, maybe he was and she just didn’t get it or take it seriously, but she does seem to be wrecked by this, like she was obsessed with him and just doesn’t get how he can be so cold and distant now. I had a totally out of the blue breakup like this once. It devastated me. I didn’t see it coming and I thought this was the best, closest, most passionate relationship of my life. And he just broke it off one day and didn’t want to give me any reasons for why really or how it could be fixed. It took me a long time, like a year, to really get over it, but I was also in high school.

      I don’t think what he’s doing is hateful or bad or wrong. It makes sense to do the parenting app when they seem to be on totally different pages regarding making it work or getting back together. He is done. She isn’t. But she can’t make him come back. And the emotional stuff she’s doing, breaking into a FaceTime with their daughter, crying, screaming, pleading, has got to be something that is hard for him to deal with and see, but it’s also embarrassing for her and she’s going to look back at how she acted and how public she was about all the details and feel not good about her choices. This is just a sucky situation all around.

      This part about how “all he was doing was asking her why she hadn’t looked at some pictures he sent her….” 1) she was hovering during the call. She was there monitoring it, and he probably knows that which is why he’s not going to get into anything super emotional or personal or private with his daughter. Also, this is probably why he “never calls.” 2) that’s a perfectly normal conversation for a dad who is away on work to have with his 8 year old daughter. What deep, personal, private, soul baring thing does she think they should be talking about? Did she think he should be grilling her about school and stuff like that? He’s not a part of the day to day and he might also feel like it might not be his place to be extra firm about things like that or to discipline his daughter because he’s not there. Mom is there and mom is in charge, and mom seems like the type of person who will take everything the wrong way. It could have just as easily been “he’s been away for months on location, barely calls, and then he wants to spend that time berating my daughter about her school work? She’s already super upset about him being gone and just wants to have a nice time with her dad when she sees him once a month.”

    • Christina says:

      It’s her, not him. I was him. My ex acted like her. I BEG you to re-educate yourself from your first instincts about this, because it hurts kids.

      Hurt adults MUST NOT do this to their children. Period. It is narcissism, and it causes damage to kids. The damage is so bad that you could lose access to your child in court. Talking to a narcissist is never about solving problems with the kids; it is ALWAYS ABOUT the narcissist working to get narcissistic supply, the attention they require like air to breathe.

      Adults need to manage their own feelings on behalf of children. I don’t care what your partner did to you. People divorce. It hurts. But communication during a divorce is important and has to be done with respect and care.

      She comes off as a manipulative narcissist. If she cared about her kids, she’d be acting differently. She cares about herself.

      Again, I have a 99 year domestic violence restraining order against a man who acted EXACTLY like this woman. He NEVER physically assaulted me during our relationship. When he couldn’t control me or get me back, he started to physically abuse our child because he could not control me with his public manipulations (writing about me on social media, calling my job to tell them I sold illegal drugs, etc.).

      This man has done nothing that I can see that warrants her behavior. He just wants to end this and move on, like I did. How can you tell SHE is psycho? HE WONT TALK TO HER. And HE IS FOLLOWING COURT INSTRUCTIONS. For his children and to save his reputation so that he can get work to take care of them. He NEVER comments publicly about it.

      A lot of people don’t understand contentious divorce and narcissistic abused. Mine was a Narcissistic sociopath, but this lady falls into the bucket. She needs a psychiatrist.

      • MipMip says:

        @Christina

        This x100. I was the product of a narcissistic mother and a passive/low-key father. When they got divorced she lost her mind and acted like this, demonizing him for things that weren’t even an issue- (like asking if their daughter saw his travel pictures-what?) she called him a monster just because he would no longer engage with her narcissism. That’s what is happening here.

        She mentions that her daughter isn’t doing well mentally. If true, that’s a RED FLAG, considering her daughter probably lives with her most of the time. It means her daughter is in a very bad environment. The stuff she is voluntarily showing us about her own behavior only illustrates that.

        Involving the kids is unforgivable but sadly, very on brand for a narcissist. This divorce isn’t about his infidelity, it’s about her (probably undiagnosed) personality disorder.

      • Nessa says:

        @Christina

        This, all of it, 100%. Brilliant analysis.

      • Christina says:

        @MIPMIP, people like you and my kid, the survivors, are heroes in my world.

        @Nessa, thank you. Help other gets it.

        It’s hard for those who haven’t been in it to get it. I don’t want to understand why. I just want her to heal herself for her kids, but, based on my experience, she isn’t going to change and it is going to just get worse until she finds another target.

    • Ry says:

      He’s cold as ice. He’s playing the game better though. I know his type.

    • Jordana says:

      Family Wizard coparenting app is commonly used in high conflict divorces. I know, my mediator told me about it and said it was needed in my case. It was even included in the terms of separation agreement! It will track and maintain all schedule info, conversations emailed within the app . It logs when the user accesses and view the schedule and emails. The messages cannot be deleted or altered.
      He was right to ask her to keep all communication within the Wizard app. It keeps a record. He hasnt ghosted her, he has just formalized their communication, and she doesn’t like it. She sounds like a nightmare, and I feel for him.

    • Kristin says:

      What the fuck? Why do you automatically assume he’s the asshole? I’ve also been following this from the beginning and she’s the one who’s been acting like a complete psychotic dickhead. She is 100% over-the-top, “look at me, look at me,” narcissistic. Even in the pictures of them together she’s posing so hard for the camera, she’s practically shoving him out of the picture. He’s not ghosting her, he’s communitcating through the Family Wizard App and she’s just pissed that he won’t engage wth her otherwise. But her basically publically accusing him of not loving his kids or caring about them? That’s truly terrible and her kids are going to hear that and it will damage the hell out of them. Given her ridiculous histrionics, I understand why he is choosing to communicate with her solely through attorneys and the Wizard app which records conversations. If she’s going to acccuse him of shit, he needs to create a paper trail of her rants and acccusations. This is very triggering for me. My favorite cousin in the world is father to 4 amazing girls and he’s a total girl dad. He loves his daughters more than life, coached them in sports, and they all adore him. His first wife, the mother of his two oldest girls, was like this woman. Over the top jealous, crazy and narcissistic. My cousin tried to make it work but he couldn’t take it anymore and it wasn’t good for the kids. As soon as he said he wanted a divorce she went off the freaking rails. Started accusing my cousin of MOLESTING their daughters, threatening to move across the country with the girls if he didn’t pay her a fortune, used child support payments to get a boob job, etc. She put him through absolute hell. And I know I don’t know these people, but her behavior is just very familiar to me, and not in a good way.

    • WithTheAmerican says:

      Yeah, this actually. At first I thought she was the problem, but this latest event coupled with his lack of interest in their children, brought it into a new focus.

      She’s desperately trying to get him to engage. Yeah she looks crazy. It’s shocking and painful to be left suddenly and then have your partner practically dump your kids.

      I’m not condoning how she’s coping, and I don’t deny that women can be the narcissist. I’m just not sure that’s what’s happening here anymore. Flipping out because you want input on your kids and their father suddenly doesn’t care? I get it.

      • wtactualf says:

        Where on God’s green planet are you getting that he has a lack of interest in their children? Like really? Seriously? Please explain.

  8. JT says:

    I don’t see how he is ghosting her if he is using the parenting app to communicate with her. It’s clear he is fine with talking about the kids but does she mean ghosted as in, he won’t speak about non-parenting issues? Why is Ioan the bad guy in this situation? Not every divorce has to be the kind where the parents spend more time together after separation that when they were married. As long as he is involved with his kids, which he seems to be, than there shouldn’t be an issue.

    • Jodi says:

      @JT the way i am reading this is, she wants continued drama and continued rehashing of her feelings with her soon to be ex husband and he is, rightfully, disengaging from that and keeping their scheduling and communication to the OFW app. My ex was involved in a super high conflict divorce the four years we were together and he used that app because communicating with his ex wife was a constant battle and fights. Ioan’s encouragement to continue using the app for basic parenting decisions and communications is actually a very healthy one. Most toxic partners reject use of the app because they can’t engage in the toxic behaviors on the app because it’s all made available to judges and attorneys as being “on record” which tells me that he is just trying to do the right thing and focus on his kids and she’s in a rage that she can’t continue the drama so she has taken it to social media. it’s going to backfire on her big time.

      • JanetDR says:

        Perfectly put!

      • Christina says:

        Yes. She is the problem.

        My ex continued gaslighting and taking over phone conversations with my kid.

        The judge gave my kid a court appointed lawyer. The lawyer immediately knew she was I danger because her dad would not allow her to communicate with any other adults unless he was in the room while she was on the phone. He needed to be there to jump in.

        She is the problem. I don’t care how many women he may have cheated on her with. She needs to figure out why she has to control her child and him. Why does she need absolute control of communication? It’s because she need to make every conversation about her and her issues.

        She is on a course to lose her kids. She is abusive.

    • wtactualf says:

      Thank you! She is lying about everything. I don’t know them and no one’s perfect but hell, at first, in March, she claimed “I know who the girl is”. Well, who is it? Oddly, as crazy broken-hearted as she is, she hasn’t since talked about another woman. There may be but I find it unlikely. The last thing someone in his situation wants is another entanglement. if I was him, I would stay clean away from anyone and I wouldn’t trust anyone for awhile either.

      She’s been a b___ from the start, saying that he left “the family” “us”. WTH does she mean? He didn’t want to be with her anymore. What do you do in that situation? Ask your wife to leave? Okay, he should’ve asked her to leave. But no, I’d bet money that he was thinking about the girls and thinking it would be better for them to stay in the house for now. Everyone who has ever split from someone they lived with knows that everyone’s circumstances are different. I think it was good of him to go stay somewhere else while things are being worked out about who is going to live where, where the kids are going to be living primarily. How is it such an evil thing that he left the house? I just don’t get it!

      She also claimed that being served the divorce papers was a complete shock. What? She’s in shock? How? Years of complaining about him on social media, years of posting pics of him on social media when he asked her to stop posting pics of him on social media. She was shocked? There’s a video she posted of them on a flight after a second then he asks her not to post it. She says I’m not going to post it. Then she posts it. It’s still there.

      She called him a p**** on twitter. WHILE THEY WERE TOGETHER! That would have done it for me. Props to him for staying as long as he did.

  9. Amy Bee says:

    I don’t get why she felt the need to put this on Twitter. It’s clear she doesn’t respect boundaries.

    • MarcelMarcel says:

      Agreed. It’s really inappropriate. I don’t know anything about the situation. But based on how she responded to that email I think she really needs to work on healthy boundaries.

  10. TheOriginalMia says:

    My dad is going through something similar with his ex, and the judge clearly told both of them not to communicate any details regarding their court case with my little sister. Sure enough, little sis delivers a message from mom on the recorded Zoom. Sigh…they have a parenting app (talkingparents) too for all communications. So stupid. Alice is a narcissist. Ioan isn’t giving her the attention she wants, so she took it. Those poor girls. Who knows what Alice is saying off camera.

  11. Digital Unicorn says:

    It’s obvious that she is not very happy about having a framework around how she communicates with him and in a desperate attention seeking stunt inserted herself into their child’s time with him to make it about her (as seen in the twitter rant). That’s some jealousy vibes coming from her. It’s also clear that they had already discussed and agreed a framework for his time with the children i.e. just him and them.

    If anyone is broadcasting ghosting behaviour its her. His email shows that he is not ignoring his children.

  12. bonobochick says:

    She is a mess.

    I don’t know why she is this desperate as he obviously doesn’t want to be with her but he is keeping in touch with his kids. She should accept the situation and move forward if only for her own piece of mind instead of airing out her “grievances” on twitter. She needs a friend or two (or a therapist) to talk to about her feelings instead of embarrassing herself on social media about something that should be private, if only for the sake of the kids.

  13. Lilly (with the double-L) says:

    I thought it was called divorcing, not ghosting? In this situation, anyway.

    • Livethelifeaquatic says:

      Valid point! Divorcing…means not being involved in the others parenting time or life. Making important kid-related decisions together NOT in front of the kids or during another’s time. This just feels gross to me. What a toxic environment for the children.

    • wtactualf says:

      YES! What did she expect? He was going to talk to her everyday? Stop by to visit the girls and get harangued by her about why he left, why he doesn’t love her anymore, what is she going to do now, etc.

      I agree. It’s divorcing, not ghosting! Ghosting is ignoring without an explanation. No doubt he gave her an explanation! I saw her tweet where she said that he told her he didn’t love her anymore. That was last year. Then her tweet in January when she said that he announced that he was to “leave his family” next week. Again, her continued oversharing on social media. Then in March, SHOCKED she was served divorce papers.

  14. remarks says:

    It’s unfortunate he’s ghosted her. But I don’t think there’s anything the rest of us can do about it. That’s where these public postings on Twitter are a little puzzling to me, even though I generally side with the wives when they share their grievances in other formats (ie. an interview?). Go figure. No one ever really sounds sane on Twitter. People always sound more measured in an interview format.

    • Fortuona says:

      It is called getting a divorce his lawyer probaly told him to not have any contact with her – that is not ghosting that in following his legal advice

      • Arpeggi says:

        Especially if she’s going to share everything online. The less he interacts with her, the less she can leak. Distancing yourself from your ex is a totally normal thing to do once you’ve separated.

      • remarks says:

        I think he’s doing what he needs to do. It’s likely not ghosting at all, I agree — i’m writing very quickly, repeating her terminology, to keep my comments succinct.

        I just don’t understand what she expects the public to do about her situation. That’s why I find the Twitter statements pointless.

    • Amy Too says:

      I think she’s trying to get through to him by shaming him, or by making him see that “everyone agrees with me that what you did was crazy and wrong,” so that he’ll call off the divorce. She’s just not accepting the fact that he doesn’t want to be with her. She doesn’t get it, she doesn’t get why, and she feels like he’s not telling her why, or the answers he’s giving her aren’t good enough. She wants to be able to work on things and fix it, but he’s not allowing that. Which is his prerogative. He might think it’s obvious why they’re breaking up. He might think that he showed her many signs that he was unhappy and she never changed or picked up on them. He might feel like the reason he gave her is perfectly valid. But it seems like she is so confused as to why/how this is happening and she wants to talk to him so she can convince him he’s wrong and he’s made a mistake. She wants to show him how upset he’s making her and how invested she is in him and the relationship by showing him how emotional she is right now. How much he’s hurting her. She seems to think that is she can just get through to him with the one right thing, that he’ll realize this is a mistake and he still wants to be with her.

      She’s way more into him than he’s into her right now and that is breaking her brain because she thought this was a good, loving, stable relationship, probably. I think she mostly just wants to hear something from him (or from someone else which is why she’s posting all over about it) that makes it make sense to her. She feels like she hasn’t gotten a logical enough/valid reason yet from him so she can’t accept it. And we don’t know if he gave a reason that she didn’t accept, or if refused to give a reason, or whatever else. She’s just coming off as totally blindsided though. And again, maybe she’s blindsided or maybe she’s just not accepting any of his valid reasons and valid and that’s why she *feels* blindsided.

      Either way, she is not acting appropriately at all.

      • Nope says:

        This feels like a perfect insight into her brain, and the only place where I (possibly) differ with you is that I would specify that this kind of behavior is probably the *reason* he is divorcing her–or if not, it’s more than reason enough. It sounds like a very, very healthy decision on his part. There’s no way this level of toxicity from her started when he left.

      • wtactualf says:

        Well-said. Please see my comment above.

  15. Esmerelda says:

    I’m mystified he didn’t get full custody. He sounds level headed, and she sounds like she needs to find a competent professional to help her manage her emotions and channel them productively.
    A co-parenting app sounds like a good communication channel, and it sounds he’s keeping that channel open, so he’s not ghosting her. He left her – it happens, and a lot of people manage to find some middle ground and co-parent maturely.

    • bonobochick says:

      The only thing I can think of is that he travels more for work and in moving around it means a less stable home for the kids. She doesn’t seem to work nearly as much so she can stay in one place with the kids and they have that constant.

    • teecee says:

      He may not have wanted it. She can be extra and needy and awful and he can still be a rather absent father who doesn’t want to be around his children full time.

    • Merricat says:

      I’m sure she promised to make his life a living hell if he even considered going for full custody.

    • wtactualf says:

      Parental responsibility (custody) hasn’t been determined yet. Although we don’t know yet (but I’m sure we will because Alice will tweet it) there are more things that need to happen and it looks like there’s a possibility that custody will be contested, in which case, they will need to go to mediation. At this point I think it’s best that their kids spend only short pieces of time with her. The deeper she circles the drain, the more likely it is that he will end up with primary residential custody.

  16. Lady Digby says:

    I don’t think she should be publicly sharing that her young daughter is struggling at school because it is private and she needs to protect her children.

    • BeanieBean says:

      That’s what I was thinking. Separate & apart from the issues with him she’s posting about, her daughter’s school issues are now public. Shame on her for that.

  17. Keats says:

    Some of my exes and I have been mutually ghosting each other for YEARS.

  18. Edith Bolton says:

    The eyes have it. Look at this woman! Not well. May not have been for a long time. He married and tried to create a family with someone who has challenges regulating herself when she doesn’t get what she wants. Red flags? Always clearer in the rear view. He’s wise to document all communications. Gonna be a long divorce. Sorry Ioan!!! And most sorry for the kids.

    • iconoclast59 says:

      @Edith Bolton, exactly. Look them up on Google Images. In nearly every single photo of the two of them, Alice has crazy eyes and is weirdly playing up to the camera. I think she has significant mental health issues, be it NPD, BPD, whatever.

      Moral of the story: Be careful with whom you procreate. Very, VERY careful. Unfortunately, too many people learn that too late.

      • MJM says:

        Lots of people who have mental illness can function in relationships without unleashing drama, conflict and abuse. This woman is demonstrating traits of a high conflict personality who is extremely manipulative and self centred. These people are hell to deal with let alone live with and I feel sorry for the people in her life.

  19. thaisajs says:

    I have no idea what happened in their marriage and I don’t care to know. I do know it’s incredibly inappropriate to talk about these things in front of your kids. It sounds like they had a system worked out for handling parenting matters, like school grades and such. I think it was inappropriate of her to do this in front of the kids and make it public on social media.

  20. Mia4s says:

    Does…does she not have any girl friends? Even one? Seriously all you really need is one good one. Family members? A cousin? There is no good reason to post this to social media, particularly when it exposes trouble your eight year old (I just looked it up, she’s 8!) is having to the public.

    Honestly it sounds like communicating through the parenting app and lawyers is the way to go. This is hugely toxic.

    • Fortuona says:

      Her BFF is Piers Morgan’s wife which is why a lot of this was turning up in the Fail

    • Andrea says:

      My mother is a Gemini and has had 0 long term girlfriends her entire life. The friends she did have there was always some big falling out never explained to me. She was extremely verbally abusive to me and my father and physically abusive towards me not to mention a huge manipulator and gaslighter. To this day, I can barely trust anything she says and sadly she is still married to my father. Some people are incapable of close rleationships with anyone due to their appalling behavior. I think this woman is probably in the same category.

      • bonobochick says:

        ?????

        What does being a Gemini have to do with anything?

      • antanina says:

        how is being a Gemini related to your mum being an asshole person? To defence to Geminis out there – some of the nicest and most interesting people I have met, were Geminis.

  21. johnny says:

    Given her history and what she wrote about him the past 9 months on Social Media (she even claimed that he has a oedipal complex and that he is a pedophille) she is lucky that he is even willing to communicate with her in any way.

    I’m fully on his side on this one: if you followed this story you will have noticed that she contradicts herself so extremely and spins every single thing against him. No sane person would accept unsupervised contact with her.

    • Fortuona says:

      And he not suprise her in Jan with this he told her when he came back in Sept 2020 and she started all this then . And do not forget she tried to stick him with sleeping with his co-star/daughter and The Sun then had to remove it because it was crap

      • johnny says:

        I mean there are SO MANY contradictions, I don’t even know where to start at this point. As you mentioned the timing of their seperation was a lie. She also non-stop uses the “he abandoned his kids” narrative but otoh frequently complains that she has to share custody with him, Sometimes she claims that he was a great husband and only turned crap when he broke up with her, another time that he was crap all along. She claimed about their (apparently for her pretty bad) prenup that she signed it after he made her believe that it’s for her best, another time she claimed that she never signed this. She has been going on about for weeks that he is in France (for work) and never calls his kids, then that he calls them twice per week for 2 minutes, today she claimed it was 30 minutes for that particular call, Even on the subject of a possible affair she is inconsistent: she claimed a few weeks ago that he changed when he met a young woman (after she already implied it months ago), then a few days later she wrote on twitter that she doesnt think that he cheated on her and that it’s unfair that other women are being accused,

        It’s freaking crazy. Of course he wants every single word between them documented. And of course she doesnt.

  22. Ana says:

    She’s “crying, screaming, accusing” and “begged and begged”. I’m going to go on a limb here and guess her daughter’s grades are taking a hit because her mom can’t get a grip. He’s not ghosting, he’s only discussing issues pertaining to the kids through appropriate channels. The “running discussion” she wants to have is probably about their failed relationship and not about their kids so he’s only shutting that part down.

  23. Plums says:

    That seems like a totally uncontroversial message from an ex, and she’s coming across as a totally un-self-aware mess with no respect for her daughters’ s privacy or relationship with her father. Your ex is not obligated to communicate with you beyond the bounds agreed to by your divorce attorneys.

  24. SarahCS says:

    Wow this seems like such a mess and whatever he is really like, she is NOT doing herself any favours and I really feel for the child, both having her time with her father interrupted and her privacy being taken away as she’s discussed on social media.

    My big takeaway is that co-parenting apps are a thing. Genius! I mean I shouldn’t be surprised as there’s an app for everything these days but it isn’t something I’d given any thought to as my parents split (then divorced) in 1986/7 when I was 8/9 (it’s all a bit hazy) but it would have been very useful! On the plus side no social media for anyone to trash the other.

  25. Lululu says:

    Why does she think anyone cares? Good lord, it’s not like he’s so famous that putting him on blast on Twitter accomplishes anything, he’s not Brad Pitt.

    She’s nuts. And quite possibly biting the hand that feeds her as well, since I assume she’s at least getting child support.

    • remarks says:

      That’s what I’m puzzled by too.

      Even if this were Brad Pitt, I don’t think her Twitter commentary would make much of a dent. Everyone would wind up thinking she’s insane there too.

  26. Lady Digby says:

    Public event photos she has her mouth wide open, wild eyed and husband looks like he is holding her up. She looks and sounds very exhausting on twitter and maybe ex just wants minimum engagement after 20 years of drama. It is their business and both as parents need to protect 2 young children.
    I would be mortified especially at 8 if I was struggling at school and my mom put it on twitter for everyone , including school friends to read and tease me about the next day! Alice needs to vent safely and privately to a therapist and friends you can trust not process the pain on twitter .

  27. Kerfuffles says:

    Oh wow. She is behaving appallingly. I’m a lawyer and have handled my share of family law cases but essentially stopped taking them because it is so exhausting having to deal with the behavior of people like this woman.

    She’s saying he’s “ghosting” her but what he’s really doing is divorcing her and she can’t accept that. She has no “right” to have him respond to her texts, calls or emails or see him in person. Yes, having someone you love break up with you is painful and can feel like a betrayal. But it is the other person’s right. If it were a man demanding his estranged spouse communicate with him in the manner he demanded, it would rightfully be viewed as misplaced entitlement at best and dangerous stalking and harassment at worst.

    Communications are now required to take place (and about the children only) over MY Family Wizard – which is very, very common in divorces with children – because all such communications are documented and it prohibits one parent from harassing another via texts and phone calls and emails and social media.

    For her to interrupt his FaceTime with his child to scream and yell at him about the divorce is not only wrong and likely in violation of a court order, but incredibly manipulative and harmful to the child.

    Frankly, her behavior is genuinely scary. She is clearly unwilling to deal with the fact that her husband no longer wants to be married to her or have anything to do with her except as a co-parent and she is willing to manipulate and do emotional harm to her children to “get” to him. Hopefully thus behavior will not escalate but this is the type of mindset that leaves to murder/suicides between exes or even worse – a parent killing their children (and then usually themselves) to “get back” at the other parent/ex and cause then unimaginable pain.

    This woman needs psychiatric or psychological help and a restraining order. I sympathized at first that she was devastated by her husband leaving her – and he may have left her in a cold, arsehole way and/or cheated on her – but that does not justify this kind of behavior. He is free to leave her and not talk to her except about the children, and even then via a parenting app!

    • Rural Juror says:

      I’m a family law lawyer and I agree with everything you said. Her behavior is completely out of line and if she were my client, I would probably fire her for this. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: people are entitled to their feelings, but those feelings do not entitle them to behave however they would like.

    • Christina says:

      @Kerfluffles and Rural Juror, EXACTLY!!!

      This woman is dangerous to her children. My ex NEVER physically abused me. The people who eventually cause physical harm were capable of humiliating their target.

      My ex humiliated me. When he couldn’t control me through humiliation, he tried to kill our child, exactly as you described, Kerfluffles.

    • Sarah11 says:

      IMO you can’t be ghosted by an ex because you have no right to communication. He is no longer her partner and thus has no obligation to stay in contact with her. The contact required for co-parenting is done through the app or through their lawyers. It’s over, O.V.E.R. Her actions are creepy.

  28. EllenOlenska says:

    Let’s pretend he’s the biggest a**hole in the Western World ( and I’m not convinced he’s blameless in all of this.). She is literally playing into his hands by leaving tons of traceable unstable rants, behavior and outbursts that will follow her into any custody courtroom. Idiotic.

    I am curious if the children spent an “ in person time” with him in the past 6 months. Do we know if they did?

    • johnny says:

      apparently (according to Alice) he sees the younger daughter – the one that struggles at school – twice per week in his flat. The older one only wants to see him at their family home, which he refuses to enter for obvious reasons. I guess Alice has convinced her to do this so that he has to face Alice, she even admitted that she is backing her daughters “decision”. They are also apparently begging him to talk to their mom, chances are that’s something she instruced too.

      Currently he sees neither because he has been working in France fo the past 2-3 months.

      • Sarah11 says:

        I had a friend whose partner’s ex was pulling this kind of stuff with the two small children from the marriage. I was a family lawyer then and I advised her and her husband to start saving money for the inevitable custody trial because that’s what it would take to get the kids away from the mother. I would advise Ioan to do the same – start laying the groundwork for a custody trial. It sounds like the mother is emotionally abusive to the children by drawing them into her divorce fight. They need to be removed from her care. He needs about a 12 month window to lay the groundwork through various motions including having a judge order a psychiatric evaluation of both parents and the children too. Or he can just put up with her BS for years to come. His choice.

  29. rawiya says:

    Eye.. don’t see what he’s doing wrong here. He’s defined is boundaries. He wants her to communicate with her via wizard and not when he’s meeting with his kids. Seems reasonable. They’re getting a divorce. He doesn’t need to talk to her if it’s not about the kids (via wizard) or support (again, probably via wizard.) They don’t need to chat anymore. He doesn’t want in the marriage. It’s sad for her, but she needs to let go.

    • Charm says:

      Its very telling that she insists on referring to him as “my husband.” As in: “I haven’t spoken to my husband in 9 months….” Uh oh…..smacks of “I will not be IGNORED!”

  30. Leah says:

    She shouldn’t be making this public because kids are mean and are more aware now with what goes on in the world. Divorce is hard enough on a child but being bullied by peers would make it worse.

    As my mother would say: “there’s no need to air the family linen”.

  31. BlueNailsBetty says:

    On a bright note, she just admitted her crappy behavior which can totally be used against her in the divorce proceedings and any future custody disputes.

    I’m sure Ioan’s attorney appreciates her making their job easier.

  32. Nyro says:

    So now we know why she was going in on Meghan Markleso viciously. Another jealous and angry Karen whose husband didn’t want her.

  33. nina says:

    This woman is bat shit crazy. Does she realize how this is going to look in court. Why is she humiliating their daughter like that.
    She sounds like an out of control nutbag who cares only about what herself. No wonder the man ran for the hills.
    She needs to learn to love her children more than she hates her ex.

    • Annie says:

      I totally agree. She’s going to lose custody as clearly, prioritizing her kids is less important to her than embarrassing herself by behaving like a fool online. WHAT. A. NUTTER.

  34. Annie says:

    This woman is seriously unwell and clearly deranged. I don’t know what she’s trying to accomplish by behaving like such a lunatic besides humiliating herself, emotionally scaring her children and setting herself up to spectacularly lose custody of her children. She’s a selfish narcissist and I dont believe she gives a thought to the damage she’s doing to the children. No wonder he dumped her.

  35. GandalfTheMeh says:

    What a nut!!

    For her to claim he sexually abused their kids is SO disrespectful to actual victims. My husband’s ex did this when he won full custody and damn near ruined his life. Thank God the kids wouldn’t play her games and she ended up losing custody for her little stunt.

    Doesn’t she realize the kids always suffer when divorces turn this bitter?

    • wtactualf says:

      I’ve been following the story for awhile. She’s a loon, yes but I haven’t seen any accusations by her of any abuse by him to the kids. The man hasn’t done a wrong and at most, he fell out of love with his wife. Although tragically sad, unfortunately very common. Not illegal and certainly not a reason a reason to try to flatten the guy and there’s never a reason to involve kids in a discussion about the divorce of mom and dad.

  36. Miss Margo says:

    What a moron to tweet about how your young daughter is doing bad in school….. EVERYONE. WILL. SEE. THE. TWEETS. Those poor kids.

  37. Annie says:

    Lol at everyone siding with him after everything that she revealed when they broke up. He’s been awful to her. FaceTiming is the bare minimum a father should do. It’s clear this divorce is hurting their child a lot and she’s now failing at school. She has every right to be upset for her child. Go see your kid. Ghosting the mother of your child and possibly only FaceTiming your child every once in a while is not something a good father does. Talk like adults and get along for the sake of the children. Ghosting the mom and letting her suffer like that hurts the children too. Fathers need to stop punishing the kids because they hate the mother. None of you should be defending this. It’s hurting a child.

    • johnny says:

      “FaceTiming is the bare minimum a father should do. It’s clear this divorce is hurting their child a lot and she’s now failing at school. She has every right to be upset for her child. Go see your kid.”

      he is currently working in France. When he is in LA he is seeing his children (she admitted this herself)

      he isnt ghosting her, they have a platform to talk to each other, documented, she is the one refusing this.

    • bonobochick says:

      LOL

    • nina says:

      She needs to stop putting her business on twitter. It is enough that her child’s class mates knows that she is struggling in school, now everyone with access to twitter knows it too, and adding their two cents worth of bar stool wisdom .
      He clearly has a reason why he does not communicate with her in person. If that video posted by another poster is how she acts in public imagine what she is like in private.
      And why is she intruding on his time with his child. The court has put in place a system to communicate regarding their children, she should use it instead of humiliating their child on twitter.

    • wtactualf says:

      What is “everything she revealed when they broke up”? Can you bullet point it for us?

  38. candy says:

    I feel bad…for him.

  39. John lemon says:

    Don’t think she’s THAT bad. One character deficit in thinking she cannot possibly look bad since she is not trying to be bad. Egocentrcity like that of a child.

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