Tori Spelling feels trapped in her marriage to Dean McDermott

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Of the people I cover regularly, Tori Spelling is one of the more frustrating. Not just because of her surface drama, but because I don’t know how much of her overall drama is fabricated. We’ve been hearing for a while that Tori’s marriage to Dean McDermott is hanging on by a thread. Even though they’ve seemingly created marital strife for publicity before, I think this time it might be real. But they refuse to address the rumors of their separation. And just when the press has them all but divorced, they make a public appearance as a family. For instance, Tori was seen recently in a tizzy outside her attorney’s office. She was screaming into her phone with a notepad in her hand, faced outward with divorcey words on it. Many outlets were prepared to call time of death on the marriage. But then the whole family went to Disneyland. Granted, Tori looked miserable while visiting The Happiest Place on Earth. But why the pendulum swing? Because apparently the kids don’t know anything about Mom and Dad’s issues. Tori’s trying to protect them. Between trying to keep up a charade for the children and the cash she might be forced to shell out to Dean, Tori feels trapped in the marriage.

Weathering the storm? Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott’s marriage has hit another bump in the road, a source exclusively tells Us Weekly.

The Beverly Hills, 90210 alum, 48, who has been married to McDermott, 54, since May 2006, “wants a divorce, but she feels trapped right now,” the insider says.

The couple, who share five children — Liam, 14, Stella, 13, Hattie, 9, Finn, 9, and Beau, 4— recently had a “fight” after the Pretty Hard Cases actor “went missing” for two days following an argument, the source explains.

When he returned, he allegedly said he would sue her for alimony and child support. The insider says the “90210MG” podcast cohost pointed out that McDermott signed a prenup before they got married, which means he won’t get any money if they divorce.

However, the source adds that Spelling recently learned that McDermott could still sue her for child support if they split. “She went ballistic” and is “pissed” at her attorneys, the insider tells Us.

The most recent fight left the Spelling It Like It Is author “very upset,” especially since the duo “have tried counseling” from time to time. According to the insider, Spelling and McDermott “constantly fight and break up,” but this argument was “really serious.”

While Spelling is “miserable” with her husband, she has remained in the marriage “for the kids,” the source explains.

The Scary Movie 2 actress “sucked it up” when she went to Disneyland with McDermott and their children on Thursday, October 21, because their kids “have no idea what’s going on,” the insider adds.

Through all the duo’s ups and downs, “money is an issue and it’s always been an issue,” the source tells Us, adding it’s one of the reasons Spelling “feels trapped.”

The actress fueled divorce speculation earlier this month when she was photographed holding a notepad that read “assets,” “support” and “custody” while standing outside an attorney’s office on October 18.

[From Us]

I feel for anyone who’s trapped in a relationship. If Tori is miserable and doesn’t think she has any options, that’s sad. The end of a long-term relationship is hard. The questionable behavior of those involved doesn’t necessarily negate that. So I would normally be inclined to be sympathetic for Tori, especially if Dean is jerking her around for cash.

However, I got hung up on the point that she’s living this double life, pretending everything is fine so her kids don’t know there’s a problem. Because Tori has already told us that her kids know everything. She claims they’ve been hurt and bullied because of Tori filming their lives. She made that part of her storyline, trying to gain sympathy that her openness has affected her kids. Rumors of this spilt started last Christmas when Dean couldn’t be bothered to show up for the Christmas card and somehow the all-informed children have missed the discussion? They must realize it’s odd that Dad is sleeping in another room. Or never home anymore. And if Tori and Dean are fighting all the time as this insider suggests, how are the kids missing that? Whoever this “insider” is, they’re full of it.

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Photo credit: Instagram and Avalon Red

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41 Responses to “Tori Spelling feels trapped in her marriage to Dean McDermott”

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  1. Digital Unicorn says:

    To me this feels like she’s setting up to announce they are divorcing and it also sounds like they are already negotiating one (esp when she mentions money is a big issue). He isn’t going to walk away with nothing and given she is broke, I think she wants Mummy to step in and pay him off.

    • remarks says:

      In theory, her mother could step in because of the amount she has, but why would she have to? She’s not married to him.

      If Tori is broke, I don’t see why he should be entitled to her mother’s money.

      • BothSidesNow says:

        I agree!! Candy isn’t married to him, but unfortunately given the financial disasters that they both are, she will probably be left helping finance their education, and possibly their clothing/housing needs. It’s apparent that she has had to help out in the past. I hope that Candy is involved in their lives though. They need the emotional, and possibly the financial, stability. Maybe daddy shouldn’t have given Tori everything she wanted!

      • remarks says:

        Couldn’t Candy just pass the money directly to her grandkids instead of through Dean?

        I don’t think Candy should be responsible for spousal support since she didn’t sign the marriage papers.

    • FrodoOrOdo says:

      I’d imagine that’s what she wants but if Candy was going to step in, she’d have done it like 8 kids ago.

      Tori is delusional. She’s steadfastly refused to take control of her life or her own decisions. I don’t see any of that changing any time soon.

      I just hope Candy is willing to pay for her grandbabies’s much needed therapy.

    • whatWHAT? says:

      well, if she’s broke, he may have to walk away with nothing.

      if she’s got a pre-nup, and he’s not entitled to any of HER money (whatever piddly amount of cash may be left), then the only thing he could get is half the house and any other “community” assets. and if they are equally broke, he won’t get child support, esp if it’s 50/50 custody. he is able-bodied, there is no reason he can’t get a job, even if it’s a “regular” job, out of the celebrity arena. there is also no reason for which he’d be entitled to ANY of Candy’s money. she may pay for school and clothes for the kids, but I don’t see how he’d be entitled to any of it beyond her support of the kids.

      • OliviaJoy says:

        I don’t think they even own a house do they? Haven’t they been renting and moving for years now? I always think these are stunts to get on those marriage bootcamp shows so they can make some easy cash. But who knows.

    • Moxylady says:

      I feel trapped because she won’t shut up about it. Stop interjecting yourself into my reality where you don’t exist!

  2. Bryn says:

    Its better to tell the children as soon as possible honestly. Kids aren’t dumb, they can tell even at a young age that things aren’t right with mom and dad. Best to explain it to them now.

    • I came here to say this. It is NOT “protecting your children” to keep them in the dark about what is going on. What is she going to do, surprise them with the divorce when it happens?
      All studies show it is NOT divorce that hurts kids, but the way the parents handle the divorce. Two separate HAPPY parents are much healthier for a child then people modeling bad behavior in an unhappy marriage. I say this as a child therapist btw.

    • AMA1977 says:

      At 14, 13, 9, and 8, the older ones almost certainly know EVERYTHING and are imagining worst-case stuff because Tori and Dean refuse to be honest with them. The littler ones likely feel stressed and scared but maybe aren’t exactly sure why, but if half of this toxicity is true, the kids KNOW and are being affected. My two (9 and almost 14) know if their dad and I have had a disagreement even if it happened when they weren’t home; kids can sense the temperature in the room and know when their parents are “off.” She’s not doing them any favors.

      She should have stayed married to that Charlie guy she left for Dean; he seems nice, stable, and trustworthy…everything Dean (and Tori, if I’m honest…) is not. That’s all I’ve got.

  3. Size Does Matter says:

    “The kids have no idea what’s going on.” LOL. Neither of them are THAT level of actor.

    • agnes says:

      this.
      also this.

    • Lucy2 says:

      Lol good point.
      Also aren’t these the people who faked an affair in the media for attention? And are now planting stories like this? And they think their teenage children don’t know what’s going on?

    • whatWHAT? says:

      these kids all have internet access. they know EXACTLY what’s going on.

  4. agnes says:

    Tori’s and Dean’s shenanigans have been all over the internet and social media for years now.
    The oldest children are 14 and 13 and even *if* they don’t have any internet-access (highly unlikely imo), they will know, because they live in the same house and experience their parents interactions every day. They know. All four of them.
    So cut the crap about sticking it out for the children. FFS. *insert giant eyeroll emoji here please*

  5. FrodoOrOdo says:

    There is a big difference between having no options and not liking your options and Tori is firmly in camp 2.

    Also, there is no way on God’s green earth her lawyers didn’t tell her you can’t address child support, custody, or visitation in a pre nup.

    This woman has been lying to herself for so many years she doesn’t know what the truth is.

  6. Boxy Lady says:

    If she tries to pull her mother into paying for her divorce, I hope Candy tells her she won’t help until Tori auctions off the stuff in her storage units and goes to a financial literacy class.
    And yeah, of course her kids know (maybe not the little one). Kids aren’t stupid. They just might not be talking to Tori and Dean about it.

    • BothSidesNow says:

      Yes. Children are aware of all of the trappings of their parents marriage. As for Candy, I do hope that she has all everything in regards to the children in an ironclad restrictions, though she is no dummy!
      In regards to Toris lack of financial structure, I do hope that Candy has her commit to a structure course and her finances are subjected to Candy auditing her expenses. As for the items in storage, I am not familiar with her stuff, but I had seen a snippet of her hoarding. Tori needs to sell all of it!!

      How these children survive from this childhood will be difficult. I hope that they are able to happy lives free from the difficult childhood.

  7. Amy T says:

    I sure hope Candy has seeded “unaccessible to Tori & Dean” college and therapy funds for her grandchildren. Because T&D are pretty much lost causes at this point, regardless of whether they split or limp along as a married pair.

    • Lucy2 says:

      I’m really hoping she leaves all the money to her grandchildren and charity, and given that she’s watched Tori and Dean’s disasters over the years, and had to pay to keep a roof over those kids’ heads, I think it’s pretty safe to say she’ll do that. If she leaves it to her own children, Tori will blow through her half in a few months.
      I really hope T&D’s kids are smart and hardworking, and find paths in life that allow them to support themselves.

      • ME says:

        I just hope Tori doesn’t end up mooching off her kids if they do get an inheritance from grandma. I can see her doing that though.

      • fluffybunny says:

        I don’t think her son should be punished for Tori’s mistakes. I’d be happy if she left it to her son and her grandchildren and Tori’s kids money is put in iron clad trusts that ensure Tori isn’t able to mooch off of the kids in any way.

      • Lady D says:

        Is it possible to put an age restriction on it, stating they receive no money until their 50th birthday or something along those lines? Gives Tori less time to burn through it.

  8. Piratewench says:

    The kids definitely know what’s up. Look at their faces at Disney… they look unhappy and tense. They also do not look healthy and well to me but that’s been the case with tory’s kids for years now.
    I hope when they get out of that home they thrive. It’s a hard thing when your childhood is something you have to spend years overcoming.

  9. kat says:

    Why would you post a picture of you in the bath with your kids?? Their poor privacy…

  10. Murphy says:

    She is exhausting.

  11. Coco says:

    I call BS on Tori looking out for the kids. Tori and Dean wear calling the cop on each other at home and a restaurants with the kids there not caring how it would effect them for attention. Not to mention they expose their kids to all their drama using them as part of storyline.

    Funny how Dean was crying to the media back in June about wanting a divorce, but can’t afford it. They both seem to have the money angle in their storyline. I have a feeling they are trying to get money out of Cindy and then will magically decide to stay together after they get it.

  12. ME says:

    I have no sympathy for her or her husband. They cheated on their previous spouses to be together. They kept popping out kids but claiming they were broke. This woman has options. Doesn’t her mom support the kids and pay for their schooling? I am sure if Tori needed a place to stay, her mom would offer that too. Tori is running out of options to stay relevant. She needs publicity. She will now use her kids any way she can. I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s pressuring her oldest daughter to become a child actor or something. I only feel bad for the kids, they are the only innocent ones here.

  13. Lila says:

    Hopefully this means she’s got to get all of her hoarded (treasures or junk) out of storage and actually liquidate it. I think there are quite a few creditors that will have their hands out, as well.

    And side note: why are people always shocked they have to pay child support, even with a prenup? Those are the child’s rights, not something a parent can sign away!

  14. Mabs A'Mabbin says:

    Who writes on a notepad anymore?

  15. canichangemyname says:

    I don’t care much about her “double life.” Most of us are not always our true, authentic selves on social media, so I can’t stand in judgment of her on that front. I’m not a fan – in fact, she’s always annoyed the sh!t out of me – but I do hope she’s able to find a way to move forward if this is her real situation. It’s sad, it does seem she wasn’t raised with a lot of common sense or financial skills, so I hope she works on that and is able to continue to raise her children, hopefully in a healthy way.

    • MarcelMarcel says:

      Yeah I totally agree. And I’m not a fan.
      I just hope she owns her mistakes, works on them (ideally with a professional) and moves on for the sake of herself & her kids.
      I’ve knew wealthy girls growing up whose parents lavished them with material possessions but didn’t seem to teach them any practical skills or common sense. I think that’d be a *lot* to address and unpack as an adult.

  16. PixiePaperdoll says:

    Two broke-ass people can’t sue each other for support because they both don’t got no money! Does Dean think his ex-mother-in-law will be bankrolling his new life?

  17. KG says:

    On their more recent show it looked like Dean was very hands on with the kids and cooking for the kids. He actually seemed to be the more tuned-in and involved parent. Tori did have a lot of distractions during that time but maybe that is the dynamic? It may be Tori can’t even picture having the kids to herself half the time. I wish the whole gang well and hope financial literacy is in all their futures.

  18. MoonTheLoon says:

    Somewhere out there, Charlie Shanian chuckles and takes a swig of Starbucks. Boy, did he dodge a bullet.

  19. Veronica S. says:

    If not for the kids, this would be pure schadenfreude, right? He got exactly what he deserved hitching his wagon to her at the expense of his ex-wife and newly adopted daughter. Downright satisfying to watch a scumbug get his in that regard. Just a shame several children are caught in the middle.