Jennifer Lopez stepped out solo to the LA premiere of Atlas last night. There was some talk about whether all of the Bennifer drama was lowkey promotion so that all eyes would be on this premiere… but now that I’m looking at the photos, no, that’s not the case. Jennifer looks so sad, drawn and she’s lost weight recently. Ben Affleck’s absence on the carpet is very noticeable. Jennifer did pose happily with her costars Simu Liu and Sterling K. Brown, but overall… a solitary appearance.
In the past 24 hours, the gossip about the Bennifer marriage has heated up. Page Six reports that Ben has “come to his senses” lately and he feels divorce is inevitable. A source told the outlet: “If there was a way to divorce on grounds of temporary insanity, he would. He feels like the last two years was just a fever dream, and he’s come to his senses now and understands there is just no way this is going to work.” I mean… it was a fever dream which he asked for, that he wanted. None of this would have happened if Ben hadn’t started writing love letters to J.Lo while she was engaged to Alex Rodriguez! Meanwhile, People Mag had this:
Over the weekend Jennifer and Ben were photographed smiling together, and they’ve continued wearing their wedding rings in public, though multiple sources indicated to PEOPLE that there’s a strain on their relationship.
“They just have very different approaches when it comes to media attention. Ben hates all attention and it makes him very uncomfortable. Jennifer has always had a different approach,” one insider says.
A source in the film industry says Affleck, 51, has “always been impressed” by Lopez’s work ethic and success in the industry, however, “always sharing her life is not his way.”
“Even though he admires that about her, it doesn’t make him happy and causes stress in his life and then in hers. There is no question their different styles clash,” adds that source.
A third source, from the music world, says Lopez, 54, “needs that expression but Affleck simply is not comfortable with it.”
“After a while it causes tension in the relationship,” says the source. “He is more introspective and private. She likes to open her heart to her fans and to the world. This makes them considerably different, and it has been difficult in the day-to-day relationship.”
“There have always been clashes in their styles, how they handle issues, and their actions, but nothing has stopped their love over the years,” the source says. “This is a great love story.”
I hate to say this, but yeah… I was right to be concerned about Jennifer’s whole This Is Me Now crap. She really did lose the plot. The visual album/movie and the documentary were way too much. The fact that she shared Ben’s letters with songwriters and producers was a huge overstep. Her need to document this “love story” for public consumption was a huge error. Now Ben is using all of that against her. I mean… neither one of them has learned a thing, that’s what makes them perfect for one another. But yiiikes.
Photos courtesy of Avalon Red.
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- Jennifer Lopez at the Netflix premiere of Atlas on May 20, 2024 at the Egyptian Theatre Hollywood in Los Angeles, California.,Image: 875020452, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: imago is entitled to issue a simple usage license at the time of provision. Personality and trademark rights as well as copyright laws regarding art-works shown must be observed. Commercial use at your own risk., Model Release: no, Credit line: IMAGO/Faye Sadou / Avalon
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- Jennifer Lopez at the Netflix premiere of Atlas on May 20, 2024 at the Egyptian Theatre Hollywood in Los Angeles, California.,Image: 875021017, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: imago is entitled to issue a simple usage license at the time of provision. Personality and trademark rights as well as copyright laws regarding art-works shown must be observed. Commercial use at your own risk., Model Release: no, Credit line: IMAGO/Faye Sadou / Avalon
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- Jennifer Lopez at the Netflix premiere of Atlas on May 20, 2024 at the Egyptian Theatre Hollywood in Los Angeles, California.,Image: 875021654, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: imago is entitled to issue a simple usage license at the time of provision. Personality and trademark rights as well as copyright laws regarding art-works shown must be observed. Commercial use at your own risk., Model Release: no, Credit line: IMAGO/Jeffrey Mayer / Avalon
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- LOS ANGELES, CA – MAY 20: Jennifer Lopez at the Netflix premiere of Atlas on May 20, 2024 at the Egyptian Theatre Hollywood in Los Angeles, California. Copyright: xJeffreyxMayerx,Image: 875022109, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: imago is entitled to issue a simple usage license at the time of provision. Personality and trademark rights as well as copyright laws regarding art-works shown must be observed. Commercial use at your own risk., Model Release: no, Credit line: IMAGO/Jeffrey Mayer / Avalon
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- LOS ANGELES, CA – MAY 20: Jennifer Lopez at the Netflix premiere of Atlas on May 20, 2024 at the Egyptian Theatre Hollywood in Los Angeles, California. Copyright: xJeffreyxMayerx,Image: 875022142, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: imago is entitled to issue a simple usage license at the time of provision. Personality and trademark rights as well as copyright laws regarding art-works shown must be observed. Commercial use at your own risk., Model Release: no, Credit line: IMAGO/Jeffrey Mayer / Avalon
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- LOS ANGELES, CA – MAY 20: Simu Liu, Jennifer Lopez and Sterling K. Brown at the Netflix premiere of Atlas on May 20, 2024 at the Egyptian Theatre Hollywood in Los Angeles, California. Copyright: xJeffreyxMayerx,Image: 875023013, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: imago is entitled to issue a simple usage license at the time of provision. Personality and trademark rights as well as copyright laws regarding art-works shown must be observed. Commercial use at your own risk., Model Release: no, Credit line: IMAGO/Jeffrey Mayer / Avalon
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- LOS ANGELES, CA – MAY 20: Jennifer Lopez at the Netflix premiere of Atlas on May 20, 2024 at the Egyptian Theatre Hollywood in Los Angeles, California. Copyright: xJeffreyxMayerx,Image: 875023083, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: imago is entitled to issue a simple usage license at the time of provision. Personality and trademark rights as well as copyright laws regarding art-works shown must be observed. Commercial use at your own risk., Model Release: no, Credit line: IMAGO/Jeffrey Mayer / Avalon
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- Jennifer Lopez at the Netflix premiere of Atlas on May 20, 2024 at the Egyptian Theatre, Hollywood,Image: 875025088, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: imago is entitled to issue a simple usage license at the time of provision. Personality and trademark rights as well as copyright laws regarding art-works shown must be observed. Commercial use at your own risk., Model Release: no, Credit line: IMAGO/Jeffrey Mayer / Avalon
This jus tkind of proves that getting married doesnt do a thing but get you a piece of paper– you dont learn, it dont teach, it wont do any of the work for you…. its not a magic fix or a promise for anything. At the end of the day you still got 2 people who have no idea what theyre doing. lol
After getting married so many times one would hope that Jennifer would know what she is doing and what she wants.
What Jen wants is to not be alone and if she ever gets to the root of that she might find true happiness. That goes for her husband Benny too.
I think she’s an emotional thrill seeker. The highs of new love and the lows of a breakup are exciting; working on a marriage is boring.
I think what she hasn’t learned is that marriage always involves compromise. And sometimes you do have to sacrifice some openness, or whatever else, to meet your partner halfway. A relationship cant always be about you simply getting your needs met. You actually have to meet someone else’s needs and that’s not always easy or comfortable.
I think this is harder for celebrities as they have this whole machine built around them. They’re at the centre, everyone is catering to them. So sacrificing anything for the sake of someone else seems like it would be really difficult.
Unfortunately it always feels like Jen wants to get things done for her image, or to prove something, so it never feels authentic. She wants to show us that she can do it all and same with her relationships, marriages: in the end she wants to show us she has the biggest of the bestest relationship with a love that is unreal. Well, ya, it is unreal.
She was already cranky at the MET from that video where she was being to a peasant
So true. And when they got married in vegas we all new she wanted to seal the deal quickly and not let him escape while some big wedding prep is underway. I think we all knew back then that Jen wants marriage to do all the things you listed here.
Oh, see I saw the Vegas thing as Ben’s idea. That was his preferred way of getting married. She gave in on that, and then he gave in on that whole plantation extravaganza in Georgia.
I’m not even shading her- Im just speaking from experience. lol I’ve been in a relationship for almost 8 years now and I wonder how the hell anybody can get married cos even after all this time we are still hitting snags XD
So couples being married aint got more of a clue than we do….
I’m married over two decades now and there are still snags…. People grow and change and life stresses and health problems take their toll…. it takes real work and commitment to continue in a partnership. And also ability to accept that it’s never going to be perfect because human beings are all flawed. Sometimes I am ready to throw in the towel, but also thinking about being single in my 50s is daunting and I’d rather stay with the devil I know.
@Teehee This is pure wisdom!
I knew he was going to do this,it was so obvious. He just had to poke her as she really couldn’t say No to him as she is the biggest sucker for a love story and he must have been bored to rekindle this. I wish he had just left her alone.
I agree with you, too. He should have left her alone but she wanted a public ego boost. Or he could have stopped her right when she was doing paparazzi glam shots on their first vacations together. If it’s too much for him, why participate in the documentary, the dunkin commercials, etc. It’s unfair to let her get carroied away to this point and then just run away saying it’s too much.
I wonder whether it isn’t the press attention generated by and directed towards *her* that he minds being part of? I don’t remember Ben Affleck as a particularly publicity-averse/ press-shy person. He has no problems doing promotional events for his own work. Maybe she needed to publicize his love letters, because she senses this, subconsciously?
Let’s not forget the boat photos. He knew what he was doing, same as her.
You should read Lainey’s much more nuanced and intelligent take on this situation. https://www.laineygossip.com/misogynistic-reporting-about-jennifer-lopez-ben-affleck-relationship-is-gross-after-20-years/78245
@Mika, yes, a much more nuanced and intelligent article by Lainey. Thanks for pointing that out.
I mean, she is an adult woman with agency. She made willful choices here, too–Ben didn’t force her into this.
If the narrative here is correct, it’s just odd that two adults in their fifties would be so lacking in self-awareness. Ben is surprised that J Lo still loves the spotlight and oversharing? J Lo is surprised that Ben doesn’t want all the attention and would rather lay low? JFC guys, did you just meet 5 minutes ago?????
And if this is true, it’s annoying AF because he HAD that low key life with Garner and he effed it up. Dude is just a mess smdh.
Kitten,
1000% correct. They are both at fault. They are grown and walked into this with their eyes wide open. They knew the pitfalls and did it anyway. Their personalities are opposite in such a way that they cannot live together.
Affleck is a self-saboteur no doubt and JLO needs to get over her desire for the “fairy tale” and do some self reflection. At their ages, they should know themselves much better than they do.
Amen, Kitten and Renee. And Catmum makes an excellent point about the boat photos. These are two people who still don’t know who they really are, and they are both addicted to sustaining the admiration that living a public life brings. He just doesn’t seem to like the price, and she doesn’t seem to mind the risks.
Same. I feel bad for her, but I recall what Jennifer Garner said about Ben. When he’s in love with you it’s like the sun is shining on you. He love bombs women.
Ben and Ana de Armas broke up in January 2021.
JLo and A.Rod broke up in April 2021.
JLo and Ben started dating in April 2021.
If these two divorce and Jenn quickly jumps into another relationship and Ben remains single, then we have our answer.
Thank you Mika, Lainey takes a thoughtful approach. This post’s headline screams Daily Mail reporting to me and it’s pretty gross. (ex: “Harry holds hands with his wife amid feud with his brother” which has nothing to do with the hand holding.)
Why is it wrong to write this way about someone you like (Meghan, Angelina), but okay to write just like they do when you don’t like someone. (Taylor, J Lo, Kate, etc.) So much mean girling.
Now this feels like her whole documentary thing was attempting to convince herself it is some great love story, rather than two people making the same mistake twice, and not learning anything or growing in 20 years.
Or convince him
He produced it. It was THEIR documentary.
I think of it like Facebook sharing. They’ve done research that shows the couples who are OTT performing love on Facebook, always talking about how lucky they are and how great the other person is and documenting everything, are usually the least secure relationships. We all know couples who were constantly gushing (or at least the woman was) and then suddenly divorce. She just spent $20 million to perform love to convince herself and her fans how great it all is which means there were problems she was trying to avoid or minimize.
Since I am the keeper of secrets, I can say that the OTT gushing couples are always the ones where there is cheating involved or they are miserable. I have one friend she is always gushing about her husband, meanwhile, has had a 4 year emotional affair on him, has been miserable with him ever since she cajoled him into marrying her because they got pregnant very early on. She has stated multiple times they have nothing to talk about and nothing in common. Sometimes when you force something or act like it MUST work, it never ever does.
She was putting out what she wanted people to believe. I know some people got an “over it” vibe from Ben during this, but I saw a guy who was embarrassed. It really reminded me of the whole Gigli time period. He has said that their relationship overshadowed their work. Now, Jen is trying to put their relationship into her work and Ben – 20 years later – is still embarrassed.
I’m calling it – Friday LATE in the day (like 10pm) on Memorial Day Weekend. The last filing in the LA Civil Court for the day so it gets drowned in everyone’s hotdogs and hamburgers and school summer vacations and graduations and weddings. How the heck is she gonna sing about love on her musical tour? I mean it’s the whole album. It’s her whole thing.
This is going to sound odd, but FWIW, I think some of the kids have bonded strongly enough and are old enough now that those relationships are going to survive and flourish – that they will have each other’s backs going forward doesn’t change anything for their parents ( who may or may not work their own stuff out and stay together), but it’s not nothing.
Yes, it seems clear that the children like each other and that Esme and Ben at least are really tight. It would be a nice thing if they could all preserve their relationships even if Ben and JLo break up.
Like with Alex R’s kids? No I don’t see it. At least not with the adults. But jlo’s kid and Ben’s kid do go to the same high school so maybe Emme and Fin at least will continue their friendship. I hope so.
I’ve never had any interest in them as a couple or separate for that matter. But I think her jewelry here is beautiful!
That necklace is incredible!
Exactly what I came to say. The dress is understated for Jlo yet highlights that beautiful necklace and earrings.
Just like last time, he pursued her, love bombed her, she fell for it and then when things don’t go smoothly for a little bit they can’t figure out a way to work through it because neither of them has the emotional maturity needed for long term relationship success. They just move on to the next. Rinse and repeat.
Relationship requires hard work and compromise from both parties. I can see Affleck compromised a lot. He had never been this open about his relationships. Some on Reddit accused him of being double standards, as he seemed okay with him and Ana de Amas being constantly pap’d. But that was different. He can’t control paparazzi. They practically staked outside of his house and his and Jen Garner’s house when they had been married for like 20 years. It’s just way of life now for him. But JLo’s action is different. She never compromised. She always took and took, which has been her track record by now. Every little ground Affleck gave in was a new red line redrawn. At some point, it’s bound to snap, as is this situation at her hand. Sharing his most intimate feelings and thoughts to the public and other people, it’s like standing in front of them being stripped naked. No wonder he snapped. Anyone would have snapped. It’s betryal of his trust for her.
I could see that. A lot of people like the idea of a relationship, and all the fun stuff in the beginning, but don’t want to do the work to keep it going when things get tough or the novelty wears off.
Whatever she’s feeling, her style is fabulous here.
The clips from the documentary where Ben Affleck discusses Jennifer Lopez sharing his love letters with songwriters and them now calling him pen Affleck it was so excruciating. She can’t say that she didn’t have any warning even Jane Fonda did but she was immediately defensive. I’m not sure what’s happened to her in her life where she really has to publicly proclaim and demonstrate things. I don’t think it’s just a case of a different style to Ben Affleck. It does seem to scream off someone with very low self-esteem who is extremely insecure. It’s a shame and really sad if it really is over between them.
But when will she learn,its so arrogant of her to just steam roll ahead and do things that make her partner uncomfortable. Where is the compromise? She is not some love struck teen,she really needs to get it together,and like I said above Ben is no better he should have just left her alone.
Gigli 2.0. He’s embarrassed
Yeah, if it was a huge success or even critically acclaimed, he would not have an issue.
It’s incredible really how history keeps repeating itself with these two. Last time they were in a (bad) movie together and audiences didn’t want to see it. At the same time, Jennifer put Ben in her music video which was replayed on tv and that was another aspect of their oversharing their relationship. Twenty years later, neither of them was foolish enough to sign up for a movie together but Jennifer nevertheless used their personal relationship as a basis for a movie, and an album, and documentary. And it’s one thing to share wedding photos, and pre-wedding preparation pictures with people (and People magazine), but to share photos of you in bed the night after your wedding is something else. That would be hard for me to take as well.
And he has every right to be. She took deeply personal letters and used them to publicly assuage her bottomless ego.
I don’t see how he’s “using this against her” now. It was a betrayal of trust he rightfully can’t get over.
Even taylor swift is (slightly) more discreet.
He knew who she is, that she loves media attention from way before, but he went ahead and lovebombed her while she was still in a relationship. And now he complains about the same thing AGAIN?
So only he has to compromise? Relationship isn’t done like this!
Well, one of the things that happened to her was Ben Affleck. Another has been noxious press attention. I’m sure there’s more, but their first go round, there was a lot of very negative, very racist attention paid to their relationship. Ben buckled. I think the press has been an ever-present part of their relationship, and Jennifer thought that she could control the narrative — and she’s been predictably very very wrong.
I honestly don’t get why she did the documentary. Fine you did an album about your love. Keep it there. The doc was so cringe I felt second hand embarassment.
But if Ben didn’t tell her he didn’t want to do that, I don’t want to hear it.
Jlo said it was Ben’s idea to do the doc. He was very involved with it, and you can tell because he interviewed her in the doc and asked her personal questions (ala he asks her Do you forgive me?) He just doesn’t like the negative press, same thing as 20 years ago.
Jennifer violated trust and intimacy sharing those letters. I am shocked and repulsed . I cannot blame Ben for being upset
That part I genuinely don’t understand, putting his love letters out there. What was her goal? Money? Fame? She already has those things! Proof of love? This doesn’t look much like love from my point of view.
Simu Liu in a cream pantsuit….be still my heart.
I know. He’s a snack.
Hot hot hot!
That skirt, is swoon worthy.
As for Bennifer 2.0, I was hoping they could make it work and prove us wrong. It was a fun ride while it lasted.
yikes. I know there may be valid reasons for why he didn’t go, but as it stands, with these rumors swirling – yikes.
Jen Garner has been posting a bunch of stuff about their oldest daughter’s high school graduation. Not sure the timing is quite right but if it was that, why not just say it? Ben couldn’t attend due to celebrations for his daughter’s graduation. Everyone would have been like “awww, that’s nice” and moved on.
No it feels like they are in the competing press briefings stage. Not good, not healthy.
Exactly! If he had a valid reason for missing – shooting a movie on location, daughter’s graduation, whatever – at this point you would think a rep for the couple would have made that clear. Instead he’s just….not there.
Why should whatever is going on with this unhappy couple have anything to do with what Jen Garner is posting about her and Ben’s daughter’s graduation? Their daughter deserves her happy celebration and I hope she was able to ignore the mess that is her father.
@giddy you seem to be reading too much into our comments. I said there may be valid reasons for why Ben would miss this premiere (including HIS daughter’s graduation) but just on a surface level, it looks really bad given the recent rumors.
Those poses above are some of the most aggressive attempts to look seductive I’ve ever seen her do. It’s like the more she tries to convince people that “there’s nothing see here, everything is fine” the more it feels like they’ve grown apart.
I’m sorry but I so don’t buy the whole I don’t like the attention stuff from Ben. And besides the movie which was a huge overstep what is she sharing so much that would be so hard on him lol. He’s a grown man that don’t know what he want and goes along with whatever his partner want until it becomes unbearable then he complain I hate people like this.
Agree Pétulia
It seems like he’s spent the last few decades cycling between going all in/over the top about whatever and then panicking and running away from it. (And always in dissociative ways like he wasn’t responsible for his choices “a fever dream” )
It’s a destructive pattern, which would be bad enough if he were just cruising through solo and having lost weekends (or years )or painting his house weird colors. But he chooses to marry, – twice, has made children, (with Jen G), parades around for paps (j-lo, Ana), commemorates his nonsense with stupid tattoos and Dunkin promo, to go all in gambling and drunk on tv.
And for an actor, career celebrity, he has *zero* game face, so his initial mania is on full display as is his boredom, annoyance, panic the second he starts changing his mind.
Ugh! Grow up man!
And get professional help if you need it.
Neither of them are going to magically change or overcome their personality issues ( disorders), staying sober and not doing a lot of damage to themselves and others is about as much as anyone can hope for. Wish them both well and hope they find some stability in life.
Agreed. Ben is a ‘dry drunk’ in his behavior (supposedly not using yet having the personality of a drunk) and qualifies as the oldest living teenager. He has always struck me as an overgrown teen in his clothing (except when JLo made him play dress-up), his interviews, and his actions. He’d better hire a sober coach to move into that rental with him. And yes, JLo had to ‘prove’ that their ‘love story’ outshone his marriage to Jen G. They are both selfish and pathetic.
You are like those people on Reddit. You seem never cared about nuance. Of course movie stars and celebrities like attention and glow. It’s the pre-requisit in the industry. But certain boundaries are not meant to be crossed, and for most people, sharing their most intimate thoughts and feelings to the general public qualifies one. If she keeps moving the goalpost about privacy and intimacy and redrawing red lines, a snap from him is bound to happen, indeed anybody.
First thing I noticed too was the weight loss. I’m tall and thin but I looked like a stick for awhile during/after my divorce. She looks great though!
The weight loss is between the stress she’s probably been under with their issues and she did say she’s been working eight hours a day with her dancers and choreography for her upcoming tour. She probably can’t keep the weight on at this point, because she’s like an athlete getting ready for the game, an older athlete getting ready for the game, and needing the stamina to get through a show.
But I think she looks better with a few more pounds on.
JLo might be desperate for love and whatever but holy sht, Ben can’t help but be miserable in every relationship and then blaming his partner as if they forced him somehow to marry/stay with them. What an insufferable man.
He is an insufferable asshole, that’s my take too.
This is why they are so perfect together !
Seeing as they’re still the same as 20y ago (?), no. they both need help and I hope they’re at least getting couple therapy. But I’m so over people blaming JLo as if we didn’t see how he publicly ruined every major relationship he got and then whined it was his partner’s fault.
Yes. Let’s not forget she has a reputation of not being a nice person. He may be problematic with an addictive personality but he’s more down to earth and treats people more kindly. He might have been reminded when getting back with her that she has issues with treating those around her with kindness and respect. I think her problems are about insecurity and low self esteem not matter what she says. That’s why she is always going after a love trophy. She, they need therapy.
@matilda I vividly remember him throwing JenG under the bus numerous times, even on a stage, despite her dealing with his addiction and their kids with the utmost grace. I wouldn’t call that kindess and respect.
The issue here is that he’s a manchild who can’t take responsability for his own actions. Surely he isn’t surprised JLo has a massive ego? Hell, he knows her better than we do.
Serena, I like what you’ve written. I do think JLo is absolutely partly to blame, but the stories leaking out seem ever so slightly to more than slightly biased against her. Ben is no walk in the park, he tends to passively aggressively act up so women break up with him. JLolost the plot with her This Is Me Now…unless maybe this was an ill conceived attempt to set poor Ben’s mind at ease that he was really and truly loved? The leak from their wedding where she sang and danced for him—he wasn’t against that then. And the end of his relationship was Ana saw those life-sized cut outs being binned—JLo wasn’t part of that relationship.
It seemed like a relationship that relied on outside attention and validation to survive.
And all of JLo’s relationships seem to be like that. She requires constant adoration and adulation to keep her insatiable appetite for validation going. Neither she nor Ben seem to realize that once the honeymoon is over, you really do need to see issues in the relationship through each other’s eyes, sometimes agree to disagree, but always consider and respect your partner’s opinions and boundaries. It’s a fine line to manage and neither of them seems able to do it. She lives in a Harlequin romance world where she’s driven to overshare, he’s passive-aggressive and goes along with her performative love for a while then back-pedals. A recipe for marital disaster.
Agree, Jaded. I remember the picture of Jen after their honeymoon night. So if I was just married, or married for any time, and my partner decided to put an after the act picture on the internet for the world to see, I would feel like that I wasn’t enough for them, that they weren’t satisfied, and that what we had wasn’t precious, and for our eyes only. WTF? Same with the love letters. I would feel like a commodity. I would feel used. It would be one thing to share them even, but to share with songwriters???? I.wouldn’t.write.another.one.
How can I say Jen doesn’t look good, when she always looks fab, as she does here. She also doesn’t look good. So unhappy she can’t hide it. Maybe that is good news. Consequences are hard to eat, but they can bring about change and rebirth. I just never bothered with her video/movie. I may go look it up and skim through it. As far as Ben, what do I know. But working on one’s sobriety is working on oneself, fullstop.
If Ben didn’t want attention why did he pursue her? And why can’t he just be like Eva Mendes if he doesn’t like the limelight?
Amy Bee, I agree….why did he pursue her when he knows she craves the limelight? They are incompatible without the maturity of compromise.
She’s made an ass of herself. It’s ridiculous and feeling the need to plaster private letters all over just to show up theone who got away now worships you…well that didn’t go well.
She doesn’t look good with this weight loss. I’m sorry, but for the issues which they’re “Allegedly” having now, isn’t that what Therapy is for?!? If he’s really “realizing” now, shouldn’t he try Intense Therapy to save the marriage?!?
Ben is an addict so he has very high arousal quotient.
He got sprung up and just couldn’t resist reaching back out to her.
He exhibited very poor personal discipline because he knew/knows exactly how she rolls.
She is a grade A Narc and lives for lots of superficial attention.
She will never get enough and he even stated as such in the doc.
She craves validation and most importantly, constant desirous envy.
Like the Babs Streisand story she told on Kimmel last night. How ‘The Barbra Streisand’ admired her fame and her ring.
This is Narc feed.
Narcs have zero insight because if she did, she wouldn’t have shared this obvious personal clue.
She will not change.
She’s entering her Norma Desmond era.
I found it ironic that she called her mom a narcissist in the documentary.
I want to add, calling it a “fever dream” is incredibly disrespectful and rude.
Once again, Ben is managing to throw his wife of the time under the bus. Stay classy Benny.
The term “fever dream” in this context describes a “disjointed or strange experience that can create a sense of outlandishness that is confusing and bewildering”. There is nothing “incredibly disrespectful or rude” about it. I’d say their brief marriage has been all that and more, going from dizzying highs to demoralizing lows. Both of them are responsible for whatever troubles they are now facing in their relationship because they are both so inwardly focused on their own needs and desires they can’t find common ground.
I just find your comments wise and well stated.
@Serena
Agreed.
Disrespectful and rude.
Trying to excuse himself for even being in the relationship in the first place.
“Fever dream” reminds me of a marriage annulment where one of the reasons can be “lack of capacity” i.e. drunk etc.
If this is true (and sadly I think it might be) while I think JLO massive ego played a part, I don’t want all the blame on her.
Ben Affleck knew exactly what he was doing, he loved bombed her for months, and when he got her back he happily played the game: I mean he did all the insta photoshoots, he liked that too. If the documentary was a hit I think things would be really different right now.
I don’t like this kind of patterns where the man doesn’t take the responsability of his own actions.
They were in this mess together, believeing they are the new Liz Taylor and Richard Burton.
I agree. Ben pursued J.Lo again for whatever reason and he looks like he’s been regretting it ever since they got married. My opinion is that Ben uses the women in his life as tools to help his career. He married Jennifer Garner at a big career low for him then things took off again. They divorced and things were stalling for him careerwise, especially after his last relapse. Then he gets back with Jennifer Lopez and things pick up again. Coincidence? I think not.
I really wanted this to work out for them. J-lo has been pretty clear about who she is for twenty years. Ben is surprised?! I actually enjoyed the “This Is Me…Now” film (didn’t see the documentary and agree that she shouldn’t have compromised her partner’s privacy). I think the bigger issue here could possibly be Ben’s addiction issues. He seemed to be under the influence of something recently at the Tom Brady Roast. Maybe he’s off the wagon and that has also strained the relationship?
When will she stop with the open mouth stuff.
I don’t know… My take on this whole thing is a little bit different. I know that Ben is trying to live a sober life and I think he’s doing OK with that. But I imagine Jennifer as the person who doesn’t drink doesn’t smoke doesn’t eat anything fun, makes herself her number one priority by taking care of herself. And I think he’s just bored to tears with that.
She’s all about her. There isn’t any room for anyone else in her life. What makes people interesting to others is the joys they share outside of themselves. Jennifer doesn’t have that function.
I used to think Jennifer Lopez wasn’t as bad as people make her out to be but she’s really shown who she truly is this year and it’s bad. Don’t get me wrong, I think Ben is awful and a self-centered manchild who publicly treats his partners with indifference at best. But I can’t stand this need Jennifer Lopez has to constantly be the center of attention and put her personal life on display the way she has. She’s addicted to the fame, attention and people blowing smoke and praising her constantly. It’d be one thing if Ben was all for it and an enthusiastic participant. Then I’d just be rolling my eyes and saying “whatever floats your boat.” But she’s clearly doing this against his will and I just can’t respect anyone who would put their unwilling partner on display like that.
You are so spot on.
As I stated up post, she’s a lethal grade A Narc.
What really got my attention was her insistence on sharing the personal love letters.
She might as well just come out and said she’s waited 20 years to get back at him for dumping her 3 days before the wedding!
This was severe narcissistic injury to her!
To her narcissistic mind, the showing of the love letters both alleviates her injury as well as proves his ‘real’ everlasting desire and love for her.
But this was a risk you see, and it’s blowing up in her face.
The hummingbird did not find his flower!
The search is back on ➡️
@Lindsay, agreed.
I think Jennifer went into this with rose colored glasses on and she thought she was getting 2004 Ben. Before the drugs, booze and gambling addiction. All the hell that Jennifer Garner had to go through with him after the fun love bombing part is over.
To me, Jennifer was hurting from being cheated on by Alex and jumped into Ben’s arms hoping they could rekindle that special thing that is between them. And maybe they did for a while. But Ben is and will always be an addict and low key blame the women in his life for his misery (see Howard Stern interview).
I think Jennifer is just seeing the worst of him now. I will forever think they are the loves of each others lives. But they can’t live together.
I never thought they were “perfect” for each other, because because I don’t see the evidence they even know who they are. Especially Jennifer who has been married many times. She really needs to take time off with herself; get to know and love herself FIRST. As for Ben, well…who knows? Just hope all these relationships and marriages do not permanently affect the children in a negative way.
I genuinely feel bad for them that it isn’t working out. Two strong personalities with different mindsets. I don’t like how they’re once again trying to put this all on her and make him look like some hapless dude. One thing I’ll say is I get the impression she doesn’t listen to anyone, including him. She just goes ahead and does what she wants to do and he seems like he checks out a lot and avoids, seems passive aggressive . Anyway, it’ll sort itself out eventually.
My sister said that if This Is Me film & album did well he wouldn’t be ditching her. And I agree with her. This is Gigli all over again. I don’t like her but I feel for her, that man is a user and a famewhore.
How much narcissism was needed though, to believe in the first place that anyone would be interested enough to pay to find out more about their love story? I just can’t wrap my head around it!
I watched the film twice and liked it. It was well done and surprisingly self-aware. I loved the choreography, and her new songs actually fit. It got mostly good reviews. Seventy-five on Rotten Tomatoes is a very good rating, not up there as great, but very good, and that was the audience rating also. She had nothing to be ashamed of on that front, and Ben, not wanting her to fail, did pitch in and guide a bit. Did he want her to do it? No. The album did flop.
I think it was everything, just the nonstop pushing of the greatest love and this project. It probably felt neverending to him. And while the documentary showed tender and loving moments between them, Ben also made many insightful comments regarding Jennifer.
I believe that they both wanted it to work, they just didn’t want to actually do the work. They were both assuming that the other had changed. It’s sad.
They are both about 30 years overdue for some self-healing work. Yikes.
To claim that you were ” temporarily insane” when you married someone is just WOW! Ben’s source is saying basically that he wasn’t in the right state of mind when he married JL but can now see clearly that the marriage is never going to work. This quote did not just come out of nowhere! At least, when when Ben & JG were announcing their decision to divorce, they waited until the school year ended & took their children out of LA ( to their home in the Bahamas).
I can’t believe that JL & Ben could not have waited just a few more weeks until their children ended the school year before creating all this drama! Violet just graduated from high school, which is an exciting time in her life & has to hear about her dad & stepmom’s marriage issues now…
These two clearly can’t agree on much. He probably feels like he compromised too much in supporting her with the film and documentary project.
At 43, I cannot imagine going back to an ex, especially a 18 or 21 years ago ex, both of which were great loves of my life. Love is not enough and there were firm reasons they broke up the first go around. Also, they are both Leos. I just can’t imagine a Leo giving up the spotlight for another Leo.
A 50-something year old man proposes, walks down the aisle 2x, buys a home and blends his family with JLo and it was a fever dream?
I can’t imagine if my husband did this two years after he asked me to marry him. I’d be in a padded room somewhere, not walking red carpets.
In these photos and those from the met gala, she doesn’t look like herself. She has lost her glow and aged like ten years. She’s still JLO, but she is obviously going through something.
I understand J-Lo shows her age more when not filtered, but her eyes were puffy and tired on the red carpet last night. I’m sure she has been doing some crying and not sleeping. It must have been so hard to go out there and act like she is okay. I felt sad for her. She’s a pro, though.
Taylor Swift lyrics regarding being in pain from hearthbreak but putting on an act on stage and no one knows. “I Can Do It With a Broken Heart.”
I can read your mind
“She’s having the time of her life”
There in her glittering prime
The lights refract sequined stars off her silhouette every night
I can show you lies (one, two, three, four)
‘Cause I’m a real tough kid, I can handle my shit
They said, “Babe, you gotta fake it ’til you make it” and I did
Lights, camera, bitch smile, even when you wanna die
He said he’d love me all his life
But that life was too short
Breaking down, I hit the floor
All the pieces of me shattered as the crowd was chanting, “More”
I was grinning like I’m winning, I was hitting my marks
‘Cause I can do it with a broken heart (one, two, three, four)
I’m so depressed, I act like it’s my birthday every day
I’m so obsessed with him but he avoids me like the plague
I cry a lot but I am so productive, it’s an art
You know you’re good when you can even do it
With a broken heart
Does he like women? Can she live a life w/o high highs, low lows, can he? Can you picture either of them bathing a cat’s butt? What would happen if paparazzi ignored them forever? A $50 million mansion, the wedding gowns, the diamonds, the destination wedding. did they ever like each other? Will he get a tattoo?
Her look here is stunning. Love the understated attire highlighting her gorgeous jewelry. Simu and Sterling look great but I want the guys to trade shoes with each other.
I’m wondering if Ben is ultimately worried about Diddy, the club shooting and the allegations that Jenny from the Block smuggled a gun in her purse.👜
While I loved her look at the premiere, she looked beyond amazing on the Jimmy Kimmel show. Wow! When she walked out on the stage in that gown, you could see her body, from all the dance rehearsals she’s doing for the tour, is slammin’. She is going to be 55 this summer. Unbelievable.
She would have filmed that earlier in the day. She looked more rested than the premiere. She came off as her usual happy, bubbly self and mentioned Ben in passing regarding her first engagement ring.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U4BzAdwUfJA&ab_channel=JimmyKimmelLive
He’s only jumping ship because her projects made them a laughing stock. Didn’t he do a lot of pap walks with Ana? He prefers a more subtle approach to self-promotion but he’s just as thirsty as she is for attention and cred. Think that’s partly why he got back with JLo; there was a vacuum and he wanted to try the power-couple thing with someone.
However, he gets points from me for having a solid reputation with service people. Seen so many comments about how he’s a generous tipper, remembers names, and spends time catching up with “regular” folk whom JLo’d probably consider peasants. And I don’t really care that he seems to be a sleazebag and kind of douchey about his women.
No one’s asking me to take sides or assess it situation or whatever but this is a goss site so I’ll just overshare. I just can’t take to JLo. She is by a lot of accounts very nasty to people whom she deems to be on a lower rung. She never had much talent; her strength is in acting but she can’t seem to stick to that. Self-promotion she’s good at. Affleck has at least done some interesting stuff.
I read that book by Molly Bloom, Poker Princess, and she hosted games with ARod, Affleck (she said he was a very good player), and a bunch of others like Rick Saloman, Leo DiCaprio, and of course Toby “Bark Like a Seal” Maguire. She said when ARod showed up, all the guys (I think including Affleck) were in awe of him.
So I wonder if Affleck felt weird when JLo started her showmance with ARod (who apparently is a serial cheater including cheating on Cameron Diaz with paid escorts).
She also wrote in her book that Saloman asked Ben Affleck, “Yo, when you were dating JLo, was her ass nice or cellulite-y?” or something like that. She said the whole table went quiet and Affleck paused before saying, “It was nice.”
I’m sure he is exhausted with the nonstop self-promotion by J-Lo which includes him being involved, using her book of their love letters he created for her, but, again, her musical movie was not a failure and did not make him a laughingstock. I own zero albums of J-Lo. I had zero expectations of the movie and was over the soulmates reuniting because Ben has issues because of his alcoholism and had only been sober for a year and was never going to be easy creating a life together. Plus, I was over the over-the-top unveiling of their being together again. It boggled the mind how performative it was, how inorganic any of it was.
BUT, surprisingly, the movie was good. It was really well done and a little bonkers in a good way. Like I’ve said, he didn’t want her to do it, but she was hell-bent on doing it. So he supported her and was somewhat involved on the periphery. It was a self-aware musical movie, poking fun at herself or her flaws. The documentary wasn’t bad. Her album flopped. Her tour will be okay, but won’t be some sold-out tour. That’s been problematic for her and readjusting it not to be based on her grand love affair.
I forgot to add that I think you are right. The power couple aspect was appealing to Ben. He was hitting that age where you fear becoming irrelevant in Tinseltown.
Doesn’t Ben have gambling and alcohol addiction issues? Being with anyone with an addiction is exhausting and can test any relationship. He may have gone on a boozy bender in vegas and gambled away a shit ton of money. Which might explain why jlo kicked him out even if it’s temporary.
One thing about jlo, she is consistent and holds herself together really well, no matter what she’s going through. She’s never changed for any man and I kinda respect that. I don’t know why she went back to ben, he’s just a hot mess.
If she never changes for any man, then it was never going to work. Ben changed for her. He can be thirsty for sure, but usually, it’s just in a pap walk with new girlfriends, or selling a movie, or damage control because he was banging the nanny.
So Ben fell back in love and decided to go J-Lo’s way to make her happy. You’re right. She didn’t change even a little. Everything unveiled about them was a huge set-up production. That yacht trip was odd. Their family honeymoon looked miserable, but he was in love, and that made her happy. I knew one day that Ben would shut down and be over it even if he was participating in it. I guess that’s what he calls the fever dream. He loved her. He was all in, and for once, trying to be a supportive partner, not change her.
One day he knew he couldn’t live J-Lo’s life and he shut down. And when he shuts down, he really shuts down. Ask Jennifer Garner. He returned to the Ben he was, no longer in the fever dream. Maybe he knew he was at risk for relapsing and removed himself from their marital tensions because he no longer saw a future. Not that either party is the sole blame. They are just two intrinsically different people, even if their passion and admiration for one another runs strong.
J-Lo kicking Ben out? LOL In the middle of her once-in-a-lifetime love movie, documentary, tour? Never.
Seriously some people need to stop faux raging over every little thing. All I meant is she knows who she is as a person and she never lets any man break her no matter what. She always holds her sh*t together regardless. She has so much misogynistic hate thrown at her, determined to break her and yet she remains rock solid. So yeah I do admire that actually.
I have noticed a preponderance of bots/trolls appearing recently – fawning on Ben Affleck while slating Jennifer Lopez.
Is this the gear-up to the divorce battle?
Have his team recruited the Depp bot army? Now that they’ve come to the end of their contract with Pitt?
They’ve been here before. When Ben had that Howard Stern interview they were all on here insisting he didn’t blame Jennifer garner for his alcoholism. Our ears must be lying to us.
I love how all these supposed sources are blaming her for whatever’s going on. Regardless of whether this marriage fails now or not, itthe whole of tiktok is blaming her for this. In 2024. Whatever is or is not going on in their relationship, and the fact is, no one really knows, except them, they’re both accountable.
Honestly, I don’t know what they see in each other (other than outward appearance).
Her only real relationship in life has been with herself. She loves herself more than anyone, and she’ll never be a person that puts someone else first. She screams narcissism and arrogance, and she’ll never have that life long till death do us part relationship because she’s incapable of unconditionally loving someone selflessly.
And Benny has self-esteem and addiction issues and those will probably plague him his entire life because he can’t say no and he’ll always be surrounded by enablers who will cater to his multimillionaire a$$. That includes women who will always stoke his ego until they eventually get sick of him and his man-child behavior.
I feel bad for their children.
I did not watch the documentary but if she showed his private love letters to her to other people, that is not right. It could be where the relationship started to sour. I also think something happened during his outing with bachelor Tom Brady. Maybe his bad behavior resurfaced since he is mad about the letters. It could be drinking, cheating or both. I believe these two people reconnected and promised to do things differently and after a couple of years together could not hold their part of the bargain. JLO should have listened to Jane Fonda. But her ego and arrogance got the better of her. Their are both sad. I really thought Arod was a better match since they are both narcissistic and very much into image.
I also used to thing that ARod was a good match… until he cheated on her.
Honestly, why can’t Jennifer Lopez just be happy and proud of all the great things she has done, and concentrate on herself, instead of getting involved with these fickle men who have proven unreliable also in the past.
Ben could just wait it out bc her career is wrapping up fairly quickly. Album tanked, movie tanked, hilarious documentary that everyone has been roasting, failing tour, and she’s been getting eaten alive in every corner of the internet. Jenny from the block’s chickens are finally coming home to roost. This is what happens when you’re a raging narcissist that’s terrible to other people