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It’s no secret that I find Gwyneth Paltrow to be insufferable. Her general snottiness and holier-than-thou attitude is hilarious, though, so she’s a favorite to write about. Here’s something I didn’t know, though: Gwyneth thinks I’m lame. And if you’ve ever read Goop in between eye rolls, chances are you are lame too, in The Gospel of Goop. That’s what Dame Goopy says in her new Harper’s Bazaar UK March cover profile – she’s talking about Goop’s critics, and she says: “There were a couple of times when I thought, ‘I’m just gonna stop doing it. People are so mean to me. I don’t want to do it’. But then I was like, ‘Who cares what some lame person out there says?’” Yes, Gwyneth. MORE GOOP. And please, what we really need are more Goop columns about juice cleanses, being we love hearing about how you’re constipated. Knowing that Gwyneth can’t poop like a normal person, and that she needs to go on monthly juice cleanses is, like, the best knowledge out there.
WE’VE always known Gwyneth Paltrow to be exotic. She splits her time between L.A and London – which we see as two dramatically different climates by the way – AND has a baby called Apple. How much more exotic can you get?
So we think it’s about time we saw Gwyneth Paltrow unleash her inner animal, as she has done for the latest issues of Harpers Bazaar. The wife of Coldplay frontman Chris Martin sizzles in seventies-inspired animal print for their “Fashion to Music” issue. But the 38-year-old actress isn’t all glitz and glam – when she’s in the UK, she acts like a totally normal mum.
She says: “In England, people are cool. They’re really laid back and calm. Beyoncé did the school run with me once, and everyone was fine.”
In fact, Gwyneth admits she has a lot of admiration for her 29-year-old pal.
She continues: “Beyoncé is the most talented human being on the planet. She has so much mastery over what she does. It’s not even confidence – it’s on a whole other level. It’s mind-blowing. I watched her (perform) a lot to see how she did it, and I was like “S***! I can’t do that!
Gwyneth also considered scrapping her lifestyle website Goop.com after she was bombarded by “mean” comments. The Oscar-winner, known for her health-conscious diet and strict exercise routine, began to hand out wellbeing advice on the web in 2008, and writes a weekly newsletter to subscribers on everything from holistic medicine to the best places to eat in London.
But her portal became a target for cynics who accused the actress of being ill-qualified to hand out tips, and the star admits she came close to closing the site down.
She tells Harper’s Bazaar, “There were a couple of times when I thought, ‘I’m just gonna stop doing it. People are so mean to me. I don’t want to do it’. But then I was like, ‘Who cares what some lame person out there says?’”
[From OK UK & Contact Music]
Always with the name-dropping. I wish Gwyneth would give just ONE interview without mentioning one of her famous “friends” or her husband or one of her ex-boyfriends. It would be an interesting challenge for her. But what else would she have to talk about, other than how much COOLER the English are compared to Americans? Well, she could talk about juice cleanses. Or pooping. Or her vitamin deficiency. Oh, I could come up with suggestions all day! I’m so lame.
Photos courtesy of OK Magazine UK.
Written by Kaiser
Posted in Gwyneth Paltrow
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- New bachelors on The Bachelorette [Reality Tea]
- Goodbye to The Office [Pajiba]
- Bachelor Sean’s fiance cheats on him [Evil Beet]
- Britney Spears out with her man [Popsugar]
- Nina Dobrev works it [Popoholic]
- Cindy Crawford needs to lay off the ‘tox [Celebslam]
- Who said it: Carrie Bradshaw or The Dalai Lama? [Buzzfeed]
I would never have recognized her in this photoshoot, if you hadn’t told me it was the Goop. I thought once all the frickles were air brushed away there wouldn’t be anything left.
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Typical, the bitch is over here forcing herself on us non-stop, whenever she has a movie to plug. Then she goes back to her beloved England and puts Americans down.
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That’s right, Goopy, it’s just one lame person who doesn’t like goop. Everyone else in the universe hangs on your every word.
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Good for her. GOOP is for her subscribers, I guess. I have zero interest in it, but I’m not a hater on Gwyneth.
Funny how she’s calling Beyonce that when Madonna used to be her best friend. I guess the did have a falling out.
I like Gwyneth because I loved her in movies when she was younger and I think she’s a good mother and I loved her father/daughter relationship. I lost my father, too, and was always moved by how much she and her father loved each other. It’s hard at what feels like a young age for yourself that you lose a parent. I never get the hate on G. She was born of privilege. She is who she is, but is always sweet in interviews
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Goopy, YOU’RE SO SO LAME!!!! :p
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Madonna’s gonna get you for publicly saying Beyonce is the greatest talent on the planet. tisktisk! Sry and I usually don’t comment on this celeb, but saying Beyonce came out on a school run and everything was “fine” is really a stupid thing to say.
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Yeah, I’m sure her and Beyonce hang out alllllll the time!
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They should have just titled the article “Yes my movie bombed and my husband can’t stand to be in the same room with me, but I’m still better than you”.
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I love Goopy despite the fact that I hate Goopy. I think she sees GOOP as community service and I adore her for her fishmongerers and juice cleanses because she really believes all of the horse shit she’s spewing.
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God she’s just EVERYWHERE these days, isn’t she?
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Leann Rimes is actually more enjoyable to snark about…but Gwennie is a close second.
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One last thought. People at the school weren’t all over Beyonce because she’s dropping her children off at a posh private school for the wealthy. Try having Beyonce with you and drop your children off at the public school in a poor or middleclass neighborhood in London. A whole different reaction.
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god-she sucks.
i used to enjoy her acting-when i didnt need to hear the sanctimony non stop.
and yea, beyonce is DEFINITELY the most talented human on the planet. so important for our planet is she.
with someone else, i’d take it w/a grain of salt, as an expression, but with goopy saying it, it’s like she is informing you of some important fact that you were not aware of before: beyonce’s gifts to the world.
And, anyone else might say ‘well, not everyoen is going to like what you do, but you do it anyway, if it’s not hurting anyone, blah blah blah’. or even ‘yea, i feel insecure about criticism, but i’m doing it anyway’.
But NOOOOO, goopy has to be like ‘anyone who doesnt like me is lame.’
I mean, geesh, even rachel ray was graceful about a freakin site called ‘i hate rachel ray’. that’s hardcore.
someone should have a site-we hate goopy dot com
or ‘goopys lame dot com’….
wonder if she could muster up a little diplomacy, tact and laugh at herself a little? uugh. over. her.
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She’s an eejit.
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Strangest thing Ive read in a long time:
“WE’VE always known Gwyneth Paltrow to be exotic.”
Umm, no Harpers UK, I dont think that Gwyneth has EVER been considered exotic.
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I have no idea what goop is. I just thought it was a nick name for her. But she actually has a company with this name….and she wonders why folks see it as a joke..
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Oh go fuck yourself Gwyneth.
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Y’all could have been called something worse.
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@trollydolly: Your comment has forced me to acknowledge that I watch too much Supernatural; I read that in Bobby’s voice.
Give her enough rope….maybe one day she’ll hang.
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I remember seeing a show a couple years ago where they interviewed one of those “cleanse technicians” and she said that she had clients who would come in every week to get cleaned out because they had done cleanses so often that they’d lost the muscle control to go on their own. Every time I see an article about Goopy I think of that interview.
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i want all that jewelry in every shot
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I am sick of lame celebutards on the covers of fashion mags – its not about egos or plugging lame movies,its about fashion – and goopy isn’t a fashionista. Btw, Country strong disappeared pretty quick didn’t it. How many twentysomethings are interested in this bozo?
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Give up your US citizenship. We would all be happy if you did!
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I am lamely inconsolable.
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“WE’VE always known Gwyneth Paltrow to be exotic. She splits her time between L.A and London – which we see as two dramatically different climates by the way – AND has a baby called Apple. How much more exotic can you get?”
I didn’t know that mainstream print magazines snarked so much on their subjects. Funnier than I would have thought.
As for Goop.com, I visited a few times several years ago, rolled my eyes, and moved on. I find her annoying, but it’s not worth my time to keep going back to a site that has nothing for me.
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I can’t imagine speaking to this snotbag. One day she’ll piss of the UK press/tabloids and she won’t think theyr’e so “laid back and calm.”
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The Beyonce comment was really weird. The transistion made no sense and there was no reason to even bring up Beyonce when talking about picking her children up from school. The more interviews she gives, the more I feel that her Oscar win was a real fluke and a terrible mistake on the part of the Academy. But of course I am a completely lame individual so my opinion matters none.
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I don’t her, I don’t hate her. She’s one more celeb spewing bullshit but so what? They all do.
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Riley, I don’t understand her Oscar win at all. Granted, I could only watch about 1/2 hour of Shakespeare in Love before I turned off that drivel.
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I agree – if you hadn’t told me, I would not know from most of the photos who this person is! Gee, does that make me lame? LMAO!
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First of all, Beyonce is not the most talented person on the planet.
Second, Gwen needs to get overself.
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Gwyneth EXOTIC?????
I think this is a typ-o and should read TOXIC
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Kaiser, why is you always associate cleanses with constipation? Just wondering, because as I understand it, they are supposed to be simply a way to ‘detoxify’ the body and give it a chance to eliminate any harmful buildups. Not necessarily as a cure for bowel stoppages. Of course, I think they are total crap. Few, this post is full of double meanings! LOL
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LMAO over Goopy’s Beyonce-worship. I”m assuming she’s not referrring to EARTH where Miss B. is merely a generic pop machine and a substandard vocalist.
God she nauseates me.
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Look, how long has Beyonce been 29? For real…
@ Marge– AMEN SISTER!!! EXOTIC is hardly the word I’d use for Gwyneth.. It must be a typo for TOXIC….And too bad OUTOFTOUCH is not a real word!
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Does she smoke? She looks older in these photos. Usually her photo shoots look so fresh-faced, like she’s younger than her calendar age but now she actually looks on the verge of 40. I wonder if she’ll start tweaking her face.
Actresses always ugly themselves when they’re trying to pretty up with needles/scalpels.
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My sister is a Nanny in London and her kids go to the same school as Gwynie’s – she called me up before Xmas squeeling that Beyonce was in the playground with 2 HUGE bouncers! Apparently all the Mum’s were totally eyeballing each other thinking ‘it’s Beyonce’ and wondering how to get a sneaky iphone pic…
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What is more lame:
Being “some lame person out there” or being considered lame by said person?
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Say what you will however, I’ve tried these detox and cleanses, and I love them. They do take work, but they are worth feeling healthly and clean. Some of you should try them and drop the hate and negativity. She obviously surrounds herself with good people, and she’s exposing a different way of life. Why are all you so resistant to change?
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ugh. she needs to have a nice big plate of organic, macrobiotic, colon-cleansing STFU.
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I like to think she’s playing a public character, like Stephen Colbert or Dame Edna. She’s totally full of crap, or not, what with the cleanses, but these pix are gorgeous.
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@Elaine,
Yes,thank you for that.This place was starting to look like a school yard full of big ‘ol bullies.
Poor G.
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deserved an oscar over cate blanchett? wtf? did she actually have sex with harvey weinstein? maybe ben affleck had sex with harvey. maybe it was a 3 way! how else could that have happened?
i know people, the right people! famous people love me! sigh! see how wonderful i am? beyonce loves to go to my kids’ school! Beyonce, just one of my many talented friends!
look at me, look at me! not you paparazzi! “I keep a whole log. I take pictures of their cars, write down license plate numbers, everything… I know my rights and, believe me, I will have them arrested. I will stop at nothing.” i only want people to look at me when i say so. like right now!
listen to me peons! i am into anal cleansing; the caca is backed up so mucho it crowds my brain. i LOVE culo cleansing, “they’re wholesome and it’s biblical – and I just thought it sounded so lovely and … clean! And I just thought, ‘Perfect!’” and look how i speak perfect espanish as well? you are so jealous, i love it! you love me!
ramen noodles?!?! who would eat that? who would feed their child that? “No, you’ve got it all wrong!” “Brits are far more intelligent and civilised than Americans.” i should know, i won an oscar for playing a british cross-dresser! in your dreams people, i am everything to everyone!
“I’d rather not have a big house, a huge closet of clothes, diamonds and a private plane, and instead a body of work that I’m proud of.” yet i don’t have a body of respectable work so i’m fine being a name dropping, big house having, fashion loving, image obsessed, mediocre actress with a blog.
“People are so mean to me!” waaaaaaa!
i am happy for paltry to deem me lame.
i am sooooooo lame.
i love being lame.
was it ramen or cup o’soup? can’t keep straight all the gems she spews.
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So for the longest time, Gwyneth was someone I really liked and, I will admit it, I even subscribe to GOOP. But I’m starting to lose a little bit of my patience with her when she automatically assumes that people who dislike her newsletter are “lame”. Anyway, I am with Michael K from DListed: “If GOOP was called ‘The Rich Ladies Guide To Being Better Rich Ladies’ and if Fishsticks pulled her head out of her GOOPHOLE to see how most of the world lives, I wouldn’t have a problem with her ass. Bitch is out of touch.”
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Say what we will about Goopy, she still can take a good picture when she’s styled right! All hail the Ice Queen!
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She’s so proud of herself for having a BLACK friend. Yeah she is hanging all over Beyonce to get back at Madge. Gwinnie has the mind of a bitchy 7th grade girl. She’s too silly to hate.
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“Why are all you so resistant to change?”
I feel like my muscles already know how to poop, and they shouldn’t have to change!
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Oh yes I have a black friend too.
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I remember reading an autobiography of someone who was big in Hollywood “back in the day.”. Obviously the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, because Blythe Danner, Goop’s mom, was insufferable also. It was well known by everyone that all the Paltrows had healthy egos.
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God, they’ve shopped her so much she looks like Blake Lively there.
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Isn’t calling someone lame politically incorrect?
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This is hilarious. She’s on a constant cycle of name drop, cleanse, backhand insult the US, name drop, cleanse, etc. And she’s always trying to sell the JayZ/Beyonce BFF thing. ???
The problem with her is that she seems to have ZERO awareness of herself in relation to the real world, yet constantly feels the need to share her wisdom as if she’s got it all figured out. No thanks. I’d rather be lame.
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Ugh, she would be bffs with another insufferable twunt like Beyawnce. They both need to disappear.
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This would be much better appreciated if she performed her Goop posts in lieu of airing SNL every Saturday night.
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@Crash2GO2 – “Kaiser, why is you always associate cleanses with constipation? Just wondering, because as I understand it, they are supposed to be simply a way to ‘detoxify’ the body and give it a chance to eliminate any harmful buildups. Not necessarily as a cure for bowel stoppages. Of course, I think they are total crap. Few, this post is full of double meanings! LOL”
And here I was, thinking we finally had an admission to explain her stuck up attitude & consistent awkward expression…Constipation.
If she’s exotic, I’M Beyonce.
Anyway, I know my life is better for being ‘lame‘. It must be nice to think the world gives a damn what you think.
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I say kudos to her, that’s a brilliant attitude to have in life especially as a celebrity, as you can never please everyone.
Gossip is very entertaining, but I would hate to think any celebrity would allow the opinions of strangers to count.
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did you go to school with her? were you the uncool kid wanting to get into her group of friends?
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this is hilarious. however, i do wonder: why does she perceive that so many people are mean to her? and why put it out there? and why is she a crusader for people living better lives in ways that probably less than 10% of the entire world’s population can afford?
her pictures are nice though.
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Her problem is that she creates a strong impression of being pretentious and self-important. GOOP is a perfect example. What she ought to do is dump the absurdity that is GOOP, and use her celebrity for something good, and not self-promoting.
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I don’t even think the idea of GOOP is the problem, it could be a fun “hey check this out”, more casual kind of thing. It’s the way she presents it (and herself), it comes off stiff and snooty.
I so hope that “exotic” comment was made with 100% snark, because otherwise that journalist is clueless has no business writing about anything related to human beings.
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Beyonce seems to have definitely taken Madonna’s place as Gwyneth’s celeb-BFF.–I tend to wonder if her comments re Beyonce in this interview were made intentionally to piss Madge off.
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Kaiser, you’re such a hater. wow. Juice cleansing periodically is good for your health because it helps you detox. You should really learn more about nutrition/health so you don’t come off sounding so un-enlightened and bitter. Don’t tell me you’re a jelly belly. rant much?
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i wonder what type of contact lenses she uses. you can’t even see a hint of her natural dark brown eyes. or maybe the magazine digitally altered the color?
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Colon “cleanses” are nonsense pure and simple:
http://www.quackwatch.com/01QuackeryRelatedTopics/gastro.html
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Gwyneth P has always been friends with Beyonce for as long as she has been friends with Madonna. It’s soo annoying really.
Remember she sang with Jay-Z live? And Jay-Z ran on stage during a Coldplay song? They also have partied together and Vegas and what not.
She was also interviewed and they asked about her favorite artist and she answered “Uncle Jay” and the interviewer was like, “who is that!?”
And she was like, my bad…I mean Jay-Z…That’s what my kids call him!
She was soo eager to share that. I believe they really do have a friendship but I don’t like any of them.
http://www.popsugar.com/Beyonce-Jay-Z-Celebrate-Gwyneth-39281
http://www.rap-up.com/2009/06/05/gwyneth-paltrows-son-calls-jay-z-uncle-jay/
http://www.thefablife.com/2010-08-27/jay-z-sings-praises-of-his-besties-gwyneth-and-chris/
http://www.rapbasement.com/videos/53403/Gwyneth-Paltrows-Kids-Love-Their-Uncle-JayZ.html
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I thought I was the only one who couldn’t stand this bitch. Ugh! I find this ice princess to be an annoying cunt!
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Rotten Kitty, I see your medical knowledge and gift for serious research is astonishing.
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In her defense, she did blog about her dangerously low Vitamen D levels, that were the source of her illness, and was mind-boggled that she wasnt getting enough sun, slathering herself up with toxic goop. Completely brainwashed by Coppertone, and the conventional press.
She was given high-dose VitD and told to get more sunlight,by a surprisingly educated doctor, which is in itself an oxymoron.
She’s an idiot and not a great thinker. But she at least educated a few of her readers about this one issue.
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England, we apologize.
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England, we apologize.
I’d call it even, they sent us the Becks, remember?
Oi @ 19: I watch too much Supernatural; I read that in Bobby’s voice.
Me, too.
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