Kim Kardashian’s wedding gift registry will potentially enrage and amuse you

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What do you get for annoying famewhore with enough worthless luxury goods to fund the budget of a small municipality? More luxury goods! Kim Kardashian has registered for gifts for her wedding (scheduled for Halloween with no sense of irony) and it’s alternately amusing and anger-inducing. Kim wants a bunch of krap, predictably, and instead of earning it herself by pasting pre-written ads into Twitter or showing up to the opening of a toilet, she’s asking her wedding guests to buy it for her. This is a time honored tradition for weddings that aren’t funded by product placement, photo rights sales and reality show networks.

Crystal napkin rings, a $175 mustard jar, $6,000 vases and WAY more! Kim Kardashian and fiance Kris Humphries have given their wedding guests a plethora of suggestions on what to get them for their upcoming wedding. The couple registered at GEARYS, an upscale luxury seller of jewelry and homeware in Beverly Hills.

The prices vary — from a $12.50 cloth napkin to a $7,850 crystal vase. The reality star and her NBA beau would also like a $1,650 silver-plated coffeepot and 24 five-piece silverware sets, each costing $1,600. (That’s $38,400 worth of Torchon dinner place settings on one registry.)

Although Kardashian, 30, isn’t a big drinker, she and Humphries, 26, have requested 24 Baccarat Vega champagne flutes, each costing $130. They’ve also requested 24 of the Baccarat Vega goblets, which will set one back $125 each.

The duo only began dating in December 2010, but Humphries popped the question to his reality TV star love in May 2011. Khloe Kardashian joked that her sister Kim’s wedding is “going to be royal wedding number two!”

According to the couple’s registry, Kardashian and Humphries will say “I do” on October 31, 2011.

[From US Weekly]

You can see Kim and Kris’ gift registry here. I made a quick spreadsheet to tally up the cost of the items remaining, and it comes to $176,478. That’s chump change for a family that’s estimated to be worth $65 million and who stand to make $5 million plus on this wedding alone. So why can’t Kim buy her own $40k worth of place settings and ask guests to donate to charity? They could even funnel the money to that sketchy church-based charity her mom uses as a tax shelter.

It’s all about the money to the Kardashians, and it’s only the best for the star who fueled it all with a sex tape and is capping it off with a wedding to a guy she’s been dating for a whole six months. Kim told Jay Leno last night that she’s been with Kris for eight months, but she just broke up with Gabriel Aubry in December so that’s not true. She also said there wouldn’t be sponsors for the wedding and they “hadn’t made up their minds” whether the wedding would be filmed. What a joke. She did confirm that there was a prenup, and said that she would have a hyphenated name, Kardashian-Humphries. You know she’s going to be under a lot of pressure to pop out a kid fast to keep up the family business.

Last night on Leno, Jay attempted to set fire to Kim’s $2 million engagement ring in an attempt to see if it’s real. I guess diamonds will not catch fire. (Sources told Gossip Cop not a decoy. Whatever.) The ring immediately burned up and turned black, and then Jay brought out the real one, showing that he’d just used a zirconia to do the test.

Kim also addressed the “affair” rumors and said she’s “never heard of the guy,” and that “it’s so crazy to me that any random person can make up a story, call up a tabloid.” She added “these kind of people should really be ashamed of themselves for trying to get publicity off of people they don’t know.” That’s so ripe coming from a woman with no sense of shame.

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Kim is shown out on 6/13 and 6/14/11. Credit: Fame

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63 Responses to “Kim Kardashian’s wedding gift registry will potentially enrage and amuse you”

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  1. teehee says:

    I’m for “enrage”, with a good sprinking of “disgust”

  2. MarenGermany says:

    If I was a guest, I would get her the $12.50 cloth napkin (pre-used).

  3. sisi says:

    ._.

    a $175 mustard jar?!?

    don’t you buy that stuff in a jar already in the store for a dollar?

    W.T.F.

  4. Shay says:

    I’ll send her my fart in a bottle.

  5. Franny says:

    Just looks really cute and normal in the pictures in the purple top. I think its because there aren’t a bunch of extensions..

  6. tapioca says:

    Getting married on Halloween – who ever said the Kardashians had no sense of humour, because that’s absolutely appropriate for this freak show!!

  7. guesty says:

    At least Khloe was appalled over her registry. Kim not so much.

  8. Quest says:

    Do they smoke? He is an athlete and she is well – whatever, why the Havana Ashtray and how many napkin holders does one bitch need.

    Seriouly bitch, I am pissed off…maybe I will send that in a crystal bottle for you. You don’t need that unnecessary stuff considering how long this marriage is gonna last

    I hope she comes down the aisle on her broom for the halloween

  9. gee says:

    I love her style when she dresses casually.

  10. Po says:

    I am always fascinated by how indignent someone like Kim K can get about other people making money off of lies. She’s a reality show star. She makes her living by lying. However, now she is deeply offended by someone else who wants to make cash from telling lies. I know some may say that there is a difference but I don’t see it.

  11. eugene says:

    SHAY you made me laughed! hahaha

  12. yepp says:

    wow what an overly entitled bitch, i really can not stand whore/ cunt /slut( yeah i could keep going) . she has everything and has done nothing but fuck to get it… say what u will about brad and angie but i love celebrites who give back and understand that its good to help the people that support them.

  13. Praise St. Angie! says:

    “Seriouly bitch, I am pissed off…maybe I will send that in a crystal bottle for you.”

    wouldn’t be the first time someone gifted her some pee. after all, that IS how she got famous.

  14. KLaw says:

    I just watched her show for the first time, to see if I was misunderstanding her fame. Nope. It’s like watching a spoiled, delusional teenager hell-bent on getting more and more attention and achieving her goal of living a Disney-princess fairy tale life… only she is NO “princess,” for some reasons I won’t elaborate on AND because she has failed to learn basic human decency. If she looked outside of her fairyland once in a while, she could learn a lot from the rest of the world (and avoid some her mistakes). Isn’t this her second marriage already? It’s tacky to ask for new stuff if you just had a wedding AND you are loaded. Just throw a big party, don’t ask for gifts. Get over yourself.

    In other words, her show is a complete waste of valuable time and brain cells, which I can never recover. Much like this post… (unless of course I succeed in saving some of you from making my same mistake, lol)

  15. garvels says:

    Unbelievable. As the saying goes money can’t by class or good taste for that matter. She is simply vulgar.

  16. L says:

    That’s actually how I knew the ‘diamond’ he was burning is a fake. Diamonds are actually quite combustable. They are carbon after all.

    Not so much that you need to worry about matches or a housefire, but yea it will totally turn into carbon dioxide if it gets hot enough.

  17. KLaw says:

    PS I didn’t mean to insinuate that posting on Celebitchy is a waste of time, but only that spending any time on the Kartrashians is a waste of time.

    just wanted to clear that up. I love this site! 🙂

  18. Blue says:

    This lying, tacky, no class having bitch. Really with all the money she has, she actually wants wedding gifts. No friggin shame at all. Also she needs to keep her stories straight. Heaven help us when she get pregnant. The world isn’t ready for that

  19. Micki says:

    Prety cheap call for someone so set up to outdo the Royal wedding.Doesn’t she know “the shabbier the better”?!
    Lol

  20. Hyphenate! says:

    Cat-faced fame-whore.

  21. dixie says:

    Seriously, this kid is just a spoilt brat. Wat happened to good morals?… This is complete nonsense.

  22. Maritza says:

    I imagine she’ll be receiving a whole bunch of $12.50 napkins although no one will top Shay’s gift.

  23. galaxy.girl says:

    Not interesting, not entertaining, somewhat bland & boring of the three “main” sisters. Are their men interesting?

  24. Rianic says:

    MK also posted the link to Khloe’s registry. Like five things were bought off it. Bwahahahah

  25. Ferocity says:

    Really? She couldn’t have asked her guests to send money to a specific charity or something?

  26. original kate says:

    it’s about what i expected from her. oh well, in about 3 years we can all chuckle when they get divorced and are fighting over who gets the mustard jar.

  27. LynnE says:

    Why doesn’t she buy that stuff for herself and ask her guests to donate to a charity? Oh that right, she’s greedy.

  28. 4Real says:

    I do like her style…

    Ever see her cry on that show? She can’t with all those injections to her face!

  29. Blue says:

    She is her own charity. I don’t get why she wants them, not like she will use them.

  30. Turd Ferguson says:

    Pretentious b!tch.

  31. futureperfect says:

    She always looks like she ate a truckload of canaries.

  32. the original bellaluna says:

    Alright you guys! Knock it off. You know she needs 24 place settings of gold-plated EVERYTHING because who would have THE NERVE to host the Kartrashian family dinners on paper plates with plastic utensils? (Designer, of course, but still!)

    Maybe she should have suggested that wedding guests make donations to her “Future Face Fund” – you know, to fix up her katastrophic kat-face!

    WHEW! /sarcasm

  33. MeriJaan says:

    lol @ shay!

  34. Tiffany says:

    I am totally not defending her list, but I am sure the guests are getting plenty spent on them as well. It’s proper to bring a gift that is at least equal to the cost per seat. I am pretty positive ALL these over the top celebs have this much and worse on their registries. She or E have to be spending hundreds per plate, bar, cocktail hour, etc.
    Meh.

  35. Mary Jane says:

    Shay and bellaluna: You guys have made my morning!
    These are some of the best comments ever! I can’t stop laughing…

  36. futureperfect says:

    Actually @Tiffany, it’s far more proper to be gracious about sharing a very special event with your guests than to expect recompense for the expense of the wedding (which she is most definitely not paying for). She requested Lalique for E!’s staff? Yeah, right.

  37. Kolby says:

    Yeah, I don’t actually hate her or her family.

  38. Mary says:

    she really does think she is some sort of royalty.
    Halloween wedding is perfect, she is already wearing the mask and the whole family is a horror show.

  39. Kim says:

    We would expect nothing less from a trashy, gold digging, ho bag.

    Mary- hilarious & so true! Cue the scary music whenever i see them.

  40. Kim says:

    She can pass out her sex tape as a wedding favor since after all it is how she became “infamous.”

  41. bekee says:

    she’s just any other lady pls for Gods sake who wldnt want expensive gift, afterall e wedin wld be attended by celebrities who can afford there gift, pls u guys shld giv her a break. Na God bless am.

  42. Angie says:

    Tacky, tacky, tacky.
    It ranks up there with my disgust of the baby showers these “stars” are thrown. Like they need the gifts. The money that people spend on “over-the-top” presents for them could be donated to a Children’s Hospital or other worthy cause. These twits have no shame and no sense of decency. I wish they all could experience true hardship for a while, wonder how they are going to pay the bills and put food on the table…

  43. dj says:

    If this is not a PR ploy, I expect her to “hurry” to have a baby. She will want to beat Khloe to that since she had to one up her diamond, and copy her NBA boyfriend. I feel sorry for Khloe now.

  44. futureperfect says:

    Question: when the engagement doesn’t last, or if the wedding burns up quicker than cubic zirconia, what’s the “proper” thing to do with the gifts their impossibly divorced from reality guests will inevitably get them? I think you’re supposed to return them. I don’t see this chick copping to propriety that doesn’t somehow profit her.

  45. Melinda says:

    @futureperfect- If the wedding does not go through or you divorce with in the first year, etiquette says you must return the gifts. Etiquette also says you have a year to give a wedding gift. If I were invited to her wedding, I would be waiting out that year. 😉

  46. Hi Kim- WISH UPON A WEDDING would be honored to accept donations on your behalf at http://www.wishuponawedding.org . We are a 501 c 3 nonprofit that provides weddings to couples facing terminal illness. Please consider donations in lieu of gifts or favors, and help make someone’s wedding dreams come true. These couples cannot afford to be married because they are fighting to stay alive and their medical bills have destroyed any hope of them getting married any time soon. We step in to help them acheive the wedding they otherwise could not have

  47. futureperfect says:

    @Melinda: Thanks. I was genuinely curious.

    @Wish Upon a Wedding: I would take note of that if I were you. Besides, if you want to get the job done, email her mother directly at KKKartrashianfamewhores1@aol.com

  48. Shoe_Lover says:

    That list is beyond tacky but what can we expect from the tackiest person on earth. And I don’t just mean tacky because of the cost of it all. I also mean tacky because most of it is so ugly and tacky looking that I wouldn’t pay 5 cents for it. And in what world does she need that many dinner settings? this b!tch makes me sick. How do we live in a world were a person can get famous for releasing a sex tape in which she gets peed on?! And the fact that she is allowed inside of an Hermes store, let alone allowed to own Hermes makes me so insanely angry!

  49. poodlemom says:

    She’s already been married, right? She should just elope. Oh, wait…then Ryan Seacrest would have no show to tape! I just can’t wait to see that Witch-y mother of hers-KRIS-insult Bruce jenner in some way!

  50. kasper says:

    I was okay with the registry until I read item 899: barrel of valtrex… that’s just poor taste, and a little uncomfortable for their guests, no?

  51. Emily says:

    That gift registery’s disgusting! Some of the pieces would be cute by themselves, but all together it’s just so tacky! Although I’ve never understood the appeal of gift registerys in the first place, they’re so impersonal. I’d much rather my friends give me an album of us in crazy costumes, or my mum give me a cookbook containing all her secret recipes.

  52. kasper says:

    @Melinda — totally.

  53. Kasey says:

    Come on y’all! Give credit where credit is due. I just saw the noir and the gold napkin holders encrusted with crystals she requested that cost $150 each. Doesn’t it show both conservativism and thriftiness that she she chose to request crystals over diamonds!

  54. Nan says:

    In one episode she wouldn’t even invite people over to her new house…she didn’t want a housewarming party and for everyone to scuff up her floor or use her things. She treats her home like a museum. She totally has problems for being picky and TACKY. They get their taste from their stuck in the 80s mom (and not funky or funny 80s…just tacky 80s!)

    You know, this might seem like a horrible thing to say but I wonder if their mom married their father for the right reasons? I don’t even want to speculate but she did leave him and eventually married Jenner.

    So weird.

  55. Jaxx says:

    I don’t care about this girl either way so I don’t know why I am bothering to take up for her, but here goes:

    Everyone who gets married gets presents from their friends and family. It’s a TRADITION. Some of the possessions I cherish most are things given to me to celebrate my marriage. They were gifts of love given by people who care about me.

    Why should Kim be denied this time honored tradition just because she is rich and can afford to buy them herself?

  56. ursula says:

    @JAXX I think the point everyone is trying to make is that it’s messed up that she cares more about what she gets than the expression of love behind the gift. If she did would she have bothered requesting almost $40 grand in flatware?

  57. Aqui no brasil a kim faz muito sucesso

  58. Jaxx says:

    @Ursula–I do see your point and the cost of that flatware alone is completely ridiculous to me, however, is it out of line to the crowd she runs with? I’m guessing she hangs out with wealthy people and maybe that’s just what they eat with. They do seem to be enamoured of conspicuous consumption, don’t they?

  59. Ilovemee says:

    Kris is the brains behind the success of the Kardashians empire. She’s just trying to ensure her kid’s futures! And they will never have to struggle or work a day in their lives because of her money making and hustling skills! Wish she was my mom!

  60. dj says:

    “Conspicuous consumption” make new catch phrase! Love it.

  61. Kathy C says:

    You know it’s not like her friends and family are poor. They can afford the stuff on the registry. I don’t know how long this marriage will last but every Bride wants to have the fun of getting and opening gifts, having showers and all that goes with getting married. Being wealthy doesn’t mean you have to give up the bridal traditions.

  62. Sasha says:

    SICKENING! They are spoiled rotten as it is! There are so many unfortunate people out there in the US. What stuff have they really done to help out others? It is all about themselves!

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