Ashton Kutcher is the highest paid sitcom actor at $700,000 an episode

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Kelso is cashing in on Charlie Sheen’s crazy. According to TV Guide, Ashton Kutcher is currently the highest paid sitcom actor at $700,000 an episode. He makes double what Laurence Fishburne did, $350,000 an episode, for his stint on CSI. Kutcher’s salary is still less than Charlie Sheen was pulling, $1.2 million an episode, but it certainly remains substantial. Leads on series usually make less than $150,000. It of course remains to be seen how well Two and Half Men will perform with Ashton at the helm, but he’s cheaper than Charlie at least.

Meanwhile Details has a glowing cover story on Ashton in which they portray him as some kind of tech guru. He seems overrated to me, and I still remember his failed attempt at entering the Internet gossip sphere, his short-lived series in which he tried to punk the celebrity press, and the fact that he hired a PR company that regularly spammed blogs with ads for it. He’s just an actor on Twitter and Facebook, but I have to give him some credit for being interested in technology and following it closely. Ashton also addresses the Twitter flame war he got in with the Village Voice when they called him out for using false numbers to discuss human trafficking. He handles it better than he did before, I’ll say that.

Details: The Village Voice just called you out for citing spurious statistics in your advocacy against child prostitution. You fired back on Twitter that their online adult classifieds constituted “a digital brothel,” then encouraged Disney, Domino’s, and American Airlines to pull their advertising. Is that what you’re talking about?
Ashton Kutcher: I think that was irresponsible journalism on their part, but I don’t want to speak about the company.

Details: Okay. Generally speaking, what is it about platforms like Twitter that allows individuals to take on institutions?
Ashton Kutcher: You can’t just say shit anymore, because people have the ability to speak up. At the same time, with the Village Voice thing, I definitely have to take responsibility for misrepresenting the data. It’s forcing transparency both ways.

Details: The line between online life and real life is getting blurrier. Is that a good thing?
Ashton Kutcher: I wouldn’t bifurcate the two. I wouldn’t say you have an online life and a real life. I think technology is just mapping and organizing what already exists. If you’re an asshole offline, you’re probably an asshole online.

Details: As a celebrity, you’re used to managing the boundary between your public and private selves. Is that something we all have to do now?
Ashton Kutcher: You have to learn to negotiate it, or you can choose not to participate. It’s almost like a manifestation of God. People used to behave morally because they thought God was always watching—in some ways God today is the collective, and the collective is watching.

Details: Sounds kind of creepy. Do you think privacy is overrated?
Ashton Kutcher: I think privacy is valuable. You don’t have to share everything, and it’s healthy to occasionally hit the pause button and ask yourself if you’re oversharing. But at the end of the day, if you’re not doing anything wrong you don’t have anything to hide.

Details: What do you think is coming that will blow our minds five or ten years from now?
Ashton Kutcher: I think the big next wave will be wearable technologies. Your phone will be your true PC, and these technologies will act as your mouse and keyboard. You’ll have a high-fashion bracelet that will perform functions for you—it’ll track your health, your movement, your sleep, your activity—and by wearing a couple of rings, you’ll be able to type in the air or take pictures with your fingers. There’ll be a device that will track your eye movement, whether it’s an earpiece with a camera or a necklace that can project and record. That Tom Cruise movie, Minority Report, got a lot of it right from what I’ve seen.

Details: What about old media? You’re returning to television soon, taking over for Charlie Sheen on Two and a Half Men. Who’s your character going to be?
Ashton Kutcher: It’s somewhere between an alien and Jesus Christ, but I can’t be more specific than that.

Details: Have you talked with Charlie about filling his old job?
Ashton Kutcher: I don’t know him. I’ve never met him in my life. But, you know, he sent me congratulations and wished me well. Via Twitter.

[From Details]

I think Ashton is off about wearable technology. His description of rings that allow you to type in the air sounds ridiculous, like it might be technically possible but I doubt that people will want to type in the air using some kind of ring. I agree that computers and smart phones will get smaller and more portable. In terms of the Minority Report comparison, remember those little spider camera things in that movie? We’re getting close to that with drone technology now, which is basically just sticking a smart phone on to a remote controlled devices.

That was really weird the way he claimed God was “the collective.” Ashton is a member of the Kabbalah cult, which is a paid-for distorted version of the Jewish mystic religion. That could be where he got that concept of God as everything and everyone. Is he saying that his moral behavior is partially due to the fact that he can so easily get busted as a celebrity? I’m probably giving him too much credit.

Ashton still seems dim to me and in no way worth $700k an episode, but it’s not like Charlie Sheen deserved over a million an episode either.

Oh in terms of that Details cover it looks ‘shopped into oblivion to me. There are no lines whatsoever on Ashton’s face. Kaiser thinks he looks hot without the beard though.

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36 Responses to “Ashton Kutcher is the highest paid sitcom actor at $700,000 an episode”

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  1. gee says:

    I think he’s hot and I’d like him a lot more if he didnt wax stupidity all day long.

  2. Susan O. says:

    That a big gamble for an actor whose star has been fading for years now.

  3. Bill Hicks is God says:

    The world economy is in freefall and this person who contributes nothing is making cash like this. It’s sickening.

    The “collective” is watching, Ashton. Isn’t that why you’ve built yourself a bunker? You can sit and count your money. Money that will be useless by the time you need to park yourself underground.

  4. stewy says:

    Gosh well i tell you what it’s stuff like this that gives me hope again for this world. Ashton is so crimminaly underused. Can’t get enough of his half assed work.

  5. poopie says:

    Did he use the BIG WORD –BIFURCATE ?
    WOW ! this guy is SOOOO full of himself and actually BELIEVES he is a scholar of the highest realm; he talks like he thinks he has ALL of the answers to life’s many mysteries. go home to your mansion in idaho or wherever.

  6. Pyewacket says:

    God he looks dumb.

  7. tapioca says:

    He would have done that job for free catering and a steady stream of hot, young women who aren’t Demi Moore!

    I think Charlie Sheen might have been right about Chuck Lorre, because he’s clearly INSANE. That said, I have a small place in my heart for Dude, where’s my car? and What Happens in Vegas so Ashton Kutcher + comedy might work out well.

    Not $700k an episode well though, Jeebus!

  8. Angie says:

    Sick…

  9. bub says:

    he is so not worth it.
    kinda hope it bombs.

  10. Maritza says:

    He is pretty hot when he keeps his mouth shut.

  11. Pyewacket says:

    I am no Kutcher fan, but I never heard anyone complaining when Sheen made over a million an episode.

  12. whitedaisy says:

    Noone is as impressed with Ashton Kutcher as Ashton Kutcher.
    I find him insufferable and I hope that he slips to obscurity sooner than later. (Which he will when this show bombs.)

  13. poopie says:

    @whitedaisy : totally agree. i was a HUGE 2 1/2 fan but will NOT watch with asshton not even out of curiosity. hate for the rest of the cast to lose out but i hope it bombs and he disappears.

  14. Rhiley says:

    He is starting to come off as a little Tom Cruiseish unhinged. I found it interesting that he mentioned the Alien, Jesus Christ thing because lately the way he behaves, the way he dresses, the things he says, have made me think, “Hmm, he thinks he is the 2nd coming or somthing close to it.” Give him six years, when he is 43 (supposedly he has lied about his age and he is really 4 years older than he claims) and he will be like Tom Cruise now: overly paid but cannot bring the crowds; full of himself; and spouting really weird new agey crap that nobody wants to listen to.

  15. Skins says:

    I am predicting an that this show will bomb in epic fashion with this guy as the star. Bifurcate…Really?

  16. The Truth Fairy says:

    (Earth explodes)

  17. Jazz says:

    Ugh, this douchenozzle – FML!

  18. jane16 says:

    What a waste of money. I wonder if he’ll be shouting all his lines like he did on 70’s.

  19. Mitch Buchanan Rocks says:

    Being married to Demi has kept Ashton relevant all these years so he could have this opportunity and Well said Bill Hicks 🙂

  20. Nymeria says:

    Kutcher reminds me of this: “Dude, I love Jack Johnson! Want to go play a mouth-based video game?”

  21. original kate says:

    why don’t they let this horrible show die in peace? it was a POS when charlie sheen was on it and will continue to be, depsite the presence of ducky.

  22. Flan says:

    Thought the friends people got 1 million an ep….

  23. Scarlet Vixen says:

    I wonder what Jon Cryer think of this dumb*ass coming in and immediately making more than he does…

    Which reminds me–I wonder what Randy Jackson thinks of J.Lo making way more than he does after only 1 season? That’s gotta make for alot of workplace tension.

  24. Courtney says:

    yeah the friends cast got a milion an episode for the last few years of the show but also get residules everytime an episode airs again which is standard in the by laws of the Screen Actors Guild. producers will do anything to keep a cash cow going

  25. DSMR says:

    This college dropout appears to be under the assumption that his vast knowledge of life is relevant to the poor masses. Furthermore, the only thing his “collective” is concerned with is the 10% they can shank out of uneducated celebrities and actor wannabes.

  26. layla says:

    Why this show is so popular has always confounded me.

    Granted, I have never watched an episode… because I could not stand it for more than 2minutes.

    Not funny and Not original…

  27. skilo says:

    Please God, let this show be a flop and be cancelled asap.

  28. sbuttrflyy says:

    I can’t believe they are giving this kind of salary to an actor who starred in Dude Where’s My Car…

  29. as says:

    Leslie Moonves overpaid this clown. He is one actor I want to bitch slap whenever I see him. He just looks like a jerk.

    He should not be the highest paid actor on TV. His acting isn’t even good. I hope CBS loses its shirt by investing in this unkempt clown.

  30. GirlyGIrl says:

    Ashton Kutcher being the highest paid anything is an insult to economics

  31. corey says:

    “But at the end of the day, if you’re not doing anything wrong you don’t have anything to hide.”
    I hate this mindset. I very much value my privacy. I hate the thought of having personal details about my life or myself discussed by other people,out in the open. I hate busy bodies,that are constantly up in everyone else’s business. I find these people to be extremely rude and invasive. It’s not because I’m up to no good or doing anything wrong. I’m just a private person, I guess and don’t think that there is anything wrong with that.

  32. Amanda G says:

    I cannot wait until this show bombs! It’ll be canceled after this season!

  33. Jag says:

    Why is he being paid more than Cryer? And for those who watch the show, why didn’t they just make Cryer the lead and then get someone else as the second “man?” I don’t understand these things. lol

  34. John Wayne Lives says:

    I want him on this show to succeed, so it will be even bigger news when he dumps smug-ass, narcissistic Demi Moore. I mean seriously, can u imagine what it must be like to live in a house with that woman? lol!

  35. Diane says:

    Can anybody explain $700k an episode to this obnoxious, untalented dolt?? His 30-second camera commercials were insufferable. Somebody’s taking an awful big gamble and I can’t help thinking this is Lorre’s way of rubbing it in Sheen’s face. I see Charlie having the last laugh here.

  36. Don W says:

    I hope it works out, but he can not replace Charlie. I also hope he cleans up an gets rid of all the dirty looking hair on him. In other roles i have seen he is a bit silly.
    I agree with letting Charlie go. He thought he was irreplaceable an could demand any thing.