Michelle Williams on parenting: “I think it’s the ultimate creative act”

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Quite recently, we’ve witnessed a few sanctimonious statements coming from Hollywood actresses on the subject of parenting. First, Jennifer Garner decided that “[T]here’s no deeper want for a woman than to be a mother,” and Gwyneth Paltrow opined that “[M]otherhood gives your life real meaning.” At least this morning’s revelation from Julie Bowen — that she admits to hating her kids sometimes — gives us imperfect mothers some slight comfort that not everyone out there is pretending to be the ideal mother. Now, Michelle Williams covers the October issue of Hobo Magazine to promote the DVD release of Meek’s Cutoff, which Williams describes as a “feminist Western,” as well as My Week With Marilyn (for which she’s already done the drag dress-up thing in Vogue). In the accompanying interview, Williams makes some semi-loaded statements on motherhood, but I’m not quite sure whether or not they rise to the level of a Goop or Garner motherhood-superiority complex. Let’s jump in with some excerpts:

On Attachment To Characters: After I end a project I always feel a little crazy for a couple of weeks and realize that it was just a come down or hangover from the character that had its grip in me. It just takes a moment or two to detach yourself from it. Like after Blue Valentine I couldn’t take off my wedding ring for a couple weeks, it just didn’t feel right, but of course I’m not wearing that today. It eventually lets go of you, so that something else can take its hold and work its magic.

On Her Life: I’m always trying to figure out what kind of life I want to live. What do I want to do? Where is the best place to be? How do I want to spend my time What situations optimize my parenting? Which really is the most important thing in my world. That’s the question that I’m asking. “How do I ive my life and workin a way that makes me the best parent I can be?” I think it’s the ultimate creative act. If this doesn’t turn out well then there is no success or awards in the world that can make up for it. So I’m always wondering what that balance is, and where it is. Like today we were in Los Angeles and we were starting to get followed by the paparazzi and it unhinges me in a matter of seconds. While nothing is physically harming you, emotionally I find it so traumatic. It completely shakes me, and terrorizes me. I find myself all of a sudden crying and screaming, so I realized this is not the best place for me to be the best parent I can be. It gets a little blown out of proportion in your mind. I’m not equipped to deal with it, to have a sane and rational approach to it.

On Acting: I often dream of quitting acting. Walking away and becoming a laundress or a sous chef, or maybe writing other people’s love letters for a living Clearly, I don’t like to be in charge. And thinking of quitting is just keeping going in disguise. When you have options, anything is bearable. It’s when a situation is inescapable that it becomes hell. It seems to me that as soon as you get good at something, it is a sure sign that it is about to walk out of your life because it ceases to hold your mind and creative energy hostage.

[From Hobo Magazine via ONTD]

Parenthood as a creative act? The mere statement sounds bad if one reads it out of context, for sure. Yet I think that Michelle isn’t so much saying that parenting is the most important thing in the entire world and that everyone should drop everything and immediately procreate. Instead, I think she’s a pretty high-strung brand of mother who continually worries about the child that she already has and probably isn’t looking to make any more in the near future. She simply wants to do right by her child, but her phrasing is a bit awkward. As to Michelle’s purported desire for a new profession as a laundress or writer of love letters, that’s easier said than done, right? As if she’d actually enjoy working long hours as a washmaid for very little pay … perhaps she should just make a movie about that sort of life. Then, she can wash it out of her system a few weeks after filming ends just like taking off the wedding ring after Blue Valentine.

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Photos courtesy of Hobo Magazine

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46 Responses to “Michelle Williams on parenting: “I think it’s the ultimate creative act””

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  1. gee says:

    She should never ever ever change her looks again, she looks outstanding.

    Also, you know someones really too wealthy when they wish they were a laundress.

  2. photo jojo says:

    I like her in the movies, she seems like a good actress, and I have enjoyed everything I’ve seen her in. But she is so devoid of personality to me. Like she’s made of cellophane. Transparent, vapid, devoid of any personality.

  3. jill says:

    This chick has been playing the “damaged-is-the-new-black” card FOREVER. Enough already.

    Heath Ledger’s passing was a tragedy, absolutely. But damn, she could make everyday chores-like taking out the freaking garbage-a tragedy, too!

    Put another daisy in your hair and lighten the f*** up.

  4. Slim Charles says:

    Of course, being a good parent and having balance in your life is a creative act. Creating a fabulous life for yourself without kids is a creative act.

  5. teehee says:

    I think she means ‘creating’ the child in the internal sense– shaping WHO they will be not just (pro) creating a human body and birthing it, obviously.
    Yes, as I understand it, it is a constant work of creation because everyday you are influencing and determining what that person will become- you are creating a human life. And as we know not everyone should be trusted with that task.

  6. Leigh says:

    @jill. HARSH.

  7. Kim says:

    She is so right. Michelle is truly a class act. She handles herself with grace and dignity.

    @Jill – she never even talked much about Heaths death let alone tried to gain anything out of it. She has NEVER come across as damaged and most women would after what she has been through. Id like to see you walk a mile in her shoes as a single mother whose daughter lost her father and come across half as dignified.

  8. lola says:

    jill:

    I know what you mean.

    It’s like shut up already. We know your child’s father died. Let him rest in piece.
    It is understandable that she remembers him for her daughter; privately, but does she really have to bring him up publically, every chance she gets? This chick will bring Heath up for the next 30 years is she could. It’s like she is saying, please don’t take my picture or follow me because I am all private and deep and yet most articles she talks about Heath’s death and her private life. Pick a box and stick too it.

  9. kerfuffles says:

    Okay first of all, there’s a “Hobo Magazine”? Alrighty then….

    I think she is a great actress and has the most exquisite face. I also think she comes across as insightful and intelligent in interviews.

    I don’t plan on having any children and get annoyed by the “you aren’t complete until you have a kid” comments.

    But I don’t think she’s saying that here. I think she’s just a really concerned mother that wants to create the best possible life situation for her child. Can’t knock that.

    I think a person can live every bit–if not more–of a fulfilled, “deep” life without having kids. But I also think if someone chooses to bring a life into this world, they need to take that job very seriously and make it a priority.

  10. Chris says:

    I actually don’t mind Michelle Williams, because for the most part, she has kept to herself and made her movies, and you usually don’t see or here much from or about her unless she has a movie to promote.

    That said, I always find it ridiculous when these millionaire moviestars, who mostly have the luxury to pick and choose when they work or even if they wish to work at all, lament in some magazine article over how they wish their lives were more “simple” and how if they weren’t rich and famous they would be happy to be some kind of (insert generic blue-collar, low paid job here). Seriously, its insulting to people who actually have those jobs, not by choice, and struggle every day to make ends meet on the mostly meagre wages they earn from those jobs. I’m sure these celebrities mean well, but it really shows how tone deaf they are to the world out there when they make those ridiculous kinds of statements.

  11. kimmy says:

    “When you have options, anything is bearable. It’s when a situation is inescapable that it becomes hell.”

    totally my life right at this very moment.

  12. jc126 says:

    Yes, her comments don’t offend me. I also agree with her statement that when you have options, anything is bearable.

  13. Kelly says:

    Her hair is soooo unbelievably perfect – the cut and color… A few days ago I was raging about how much I hated her as “Marilyn,” but I love her as herself.

  14. MAP says:

    I am a parent and understand what she means by parenting being creative. There’s no manual or handbook, so you really have to figure out how to be a parent, the kind of parent your child needs. That’s all.

    Also, I understand her being a high strung parent. She is a single parent — her child depends on her and only her. It can be quite daunting.

    Finally, I don’t see in the excerpts where she mentioned Heath.

  15. Embee says:

    “And thinking of quitting is just keeping going in disguise. When you have options, anything is bearable. It’s when a situation is inescapable that it becomes hell. It seems to me that as soon as you get good at something, it is a sure sign that it is about to walk out of your life because it ceases to hold your mind and creative energy hostage.”

    So well put, and so apt for me now.

  16. danielle says:

    I think she’s just a little too…up her own *ss. Seems common with creative types, really. Sortof Franco-esque.

  17. Kristine says:

    How can you judge somebody without being into his shoes? I have read some of Michelle’s interviews over time and I believe she is very deep and a very sensitive person. Above average.
    Seeing somebody as devoid of personality or vapid could be just a result of lacking the deepness and ability to understand that other people are different, and that is a very good thing.
    I love her face in the pictures!
    Have a good day.

  18. serena says:

    I don’t care about her quotes (never interesting) those photos are beautiful. Finally she quit with that white-horrid-blonde and really thank god she did. She’s so much better like this. I really like that hairstyle on her.

  19. Ell says:

    Love her hair. I’ll always have a fondness for Michelle, she obviously thinks and analyses every situation, I can relate to that.

  20. Esmom says:

    She looks beautiful, especially in that cover shot. I wish I could pull off that haircut (talk about low maintenance) but I’m positive I’d end up looking and feeling butch and matronly instead of gamine and elegant like she does.

  21. lucy2 says:

    WTF is Hobo magazine?
    Beautiful photos. She’s lovely, and such a talented actress.
    I’ve rarely seen her mention Heath, and I don’t think she talked about him at all for a long time.
    She seems like an interesting person, but she doesn’t put too much of herself out there – I like that.

  22. Larissa says:

    If a mother opens up her mouth to say anything motherhood related it doesnt mean they are directing their opinions to people who DONT have children, get over yourselves people.
    BTW, she looks absolutely gorgeous!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  23. loveyourwork says:

    “I often dream of quitting acting. Walking away and becoming a laundress or a sous chef, or maybe writing other people’s love letters for a living Clearly, I don’t like to be in charge. And thinking of quitting is just keeping going in disguise.”

    BOOOOHOOOO. My name is Michelle Williams and I am a giant vagina.

    She comes across as so sanctimonious and high-strung – with no joie de vivre; monotone and limp. She needs a prescription for Valium and possibly a stint as a laundress to shake her from blasé sleepwalk through the hallowed halls of Hollywood.

    She seems ungrateful for her bounty and though she speaks eloquently and is obviously intelligent, she comes across – in my eyes – as ignorant.

    With her artfully worded musings she puts forth an aura of being trapped. To me, if you’re that over it – move on. I’m sure she would be welcome in some beatnik coffee house, whereupon she could rightfully reclaim her loner status.

    I could see her losing her mind and ending up in a sanatorium. Or maybe that’s just because she looks like a repressed housewife from the 60s.

    And I am not bugging on the child at all; it isn’t her fault, but Matilda? What a depressing name. I’d be pissed if my parents did that to me.

  24. Jayna says:

    If GOOP gave this interview the hate would be all over this thread. I found the interview self-involved, pretentious, like she’s trying to impress the readers and herself. Spare me.

  25. Denise says:

    I am convinced that actors/celebrities/try hards are in their own zone; correction, own planet. They must have no idea what the rest of the country are dealing with on a daily basis, because they are so out of touch. Motherhood completes them….we get it! Now STFU

  26. tripmom says:

    I’ve always thought she was a pretentious twit and this interview does nothing to encourage me to really change that theory.

    I must grudgingly admit that she gets prettier all the time.

  27. Christine says:

    Um….when did she become stunning???? She’s my new girl crush.

    I’m not offended by her comments, as I was with Garner and Goop. These artsy types are all about creativity.

  28. jill says:

    My previous comment was meant to convey that I felt she has come across as “damaged” or “fragile” long before Mr. Ledger’s passing. As in his death notwithstanding, which is what I was trying to state with my comment qualifying his death from my opinion of her.

    I’ve followed her career for quite a while now and even at the end of Dawson’s Creek when she was doing her first stage roles with nudity (and how understandably emotionally taxing that was) and discussing her issues with her father and then-boyfriend Morgan Freeman (not the actor), she seemed to posess a Winona-Ryder-like fragility that didn’t seem to necessarily bode well for her long term happiness as an actress. Fast forward 10 years and she seems to be in a very similiar head space. After a while, when a person continues to put themselves into circumstances (i.e. acting roles) that stress themselves to the degree that she seems stressed, then yeah, I do begin to lose a little patience with their comments about said stress.

    And please, let us be mindful that very few of us posting here have any idea about the real circumstances of each other’s life. These are our opinions for goodness sake, so I would like to not make assumptions about what others here have gone through, their abilities, etc…

    I am only posting again to clarify my comments as I do believe her to be a talented actress. But, as with some people, their abilities in their given profession are not necessarily matched by their abilities as interview subjects (or commenters on web sites-as may very well be the case with me and my first post).

    If this is truly how she feels (and she seems to be open and honest in interviews), then I’m not sure this profession is necessarily the healthiest for her.

    And Kristine has the best send off:
    Have a good day.

  29. mln76 says:

    I liked what she said first off because she made it clear she was talking about herself and not every woman. Secondly because she’s right. If she’s a bad mom and a good actress it really doesn’t matter at the end of the day what her movies are about just ask Joan Crawford.

  30. thebutlerdidit says:

    Bitch, please. You are a very pretty actress w/ talent. Don’t talk.

  31. Turtle Dove says:

    “When you have options, anything is bearable.”

    Darling, the millions that you make GIVE you options. No-one on this post is proclaiming that they’ll throw in the towel and start a simple life…. we are LIVING the simple life, you’re living the dream.

    Michelle is gorgeous and a good actress, but she’s beginning to squander my good will with this woo-is-me lamenting.

  32. itstrue says:

    Yes, God forbid anyone should portray motherhood as fulfilling or enjoyable. As tired as others may be of mothers who profess to love motherhood, I’m equally sick of mothers acting like their life is so shitty because they have kids. It’s not that hard, yes it’s work, quit whining.

  33. melanie says:

    Most sanctimonious interview ever. A laundress? Seriously? How insulting to those who NEVER have a way out of minimum wage. WOW..Immediate **dislike**.

  34. Anahata says:

    Okay. I have a child. It’s really really really hard. I run a small business and raising my child is the hardest I’ve ever worked. Ever – and I’m one of those work until 4am people. So finding a way to make it fulfilling (for you and baby), rewarding and doing it “the right way” is definitely the biggest creative challenge of my life. I think Michelle is being very forthright here about this. I too am getting pretty weary of women without children assuming all child-related comments are about them. Are you guys just used to only thinking of yourselves?

  35. Becky says:

    “Are you guys just used to only thinking of yourselves?”

    @Anahata-I don’t know why you felt the need to make that statement/ask that question re: women without kids. What was the point of that? It seems like an unnecessary dig. From the posts I’ve read, no one (parents or non-parents) seems to have any issue with Michelle Williams comments about parenting. I know I certainly don’t. I don’t have kids and I don’t assume that all child related comments are about me-I think that’s a really big overgeneralization. I don’t make blanket statements about people who are parents.

  36. MikaMoo says:

    cry baby. get over it.. no one WANTS to be a laundry maid.. please.

  37. Bodhi says:

    Sanctimonious? I don’t think she comes off as remotely sanctimonious in this interview. Also, she didn’t mention Heath once. But people love to project, so I guess that she will have to carry his ghost with her until the end of time…

  38. JaneWonderfalls says:

    Michelle Williams plays in some really great independent low key films, but it;s something about her that’s just depressing even before Heath Ledger passed away. She always seemed so gloomy.

  39. LittleDeadGrrl says:

    I actually like what she said about parenting. She meant there isn’t a do over, you have to do your best to create a good human being and the part you take in that is real unlike movies which are forgotten in a few years.

    I rolled my eyes more at the pap thing. Yes yes, someone takes your picture when you hang out in public places in LA and it is tramatic. Considering I never hear of her in the tabloids I didn’t think that was a huge problem for her.

  40. Peppermint says:

    Please enough with the parenting crap. It can be heaven as it can be hell (in extreme situations), sort of like with romantic relationships, and mothers are entitled to feel so (one thing is feelings and thoughts, a different one is actions. And yes, I believe a good mother can feel hate sometimes, as it is somehow intertwined with love. And it is ok if you FEEL that. Again, actions are different. Accept your feelings, analyze them, and then behave the best you can. Motherhood leaves you no option, you just have to be the best you can).

    The infuriating thing with motherhood and celebrities is that nowadays they are constantly advertising it as the ultimate item for perfection or completion. That is BS, and perverse advertising. Really, a woman can be as fulfilled without children as with them, as with or without a man. It is to each one to live our lives the best we can.
    Life is long and complicated, circumstances change… Sisters, respect please. And love.

  41. Dee Cee says:

    How do get over your lover killing himself.. you explain your father lived recklessly and killed himself to a child.. she is worried about the repercussions and wants to protect her.. no where to run and hide, ..and this child is her deepest responsibility..

  42. Mitch Buchanan Rocks says:

    My laundry needs doin so Michelle you can come on over, and don’t forget the fabric softener.

  43. Turtle Dove says:

    “I too am getting pretty weary of women without children assuming all child-related comments are about them. Are you guys just used to only thinking of yourselves? ”

    And not every comment is about you either. Just because someone chooses to not have kids doesn’t mean she is SELFISH and thinks only of herself. What a stupid comment.

  44. Ramona Q says:

    Why is she a meek pixie child 🙁

  45. Moreaces says:

    Looks like Justin Beiber