Tom Cruise in the ‘Rock of Ages’ trailer: gloriously painful or not that awful?

Honestly, this week of Tom Cruise international red carpet appearances for Mission: Impossible — Ghost Protocol has been a true pleasure to cover, but now something even better has happened. That is, the first Rock of Ages trailer has debuted, and it’s even more painfully amusing than I’d hoped it would be. This is why Tom practiced ten hours per day, folks. This is why he butched it up in well-heeled boots. And this is why he rocked out on a balcony to universal cringes. In a way, it was all worth it for Tom, who writhes shirtless onstage as the “legendary” Stacee Jaxx and spews out “sex, hateful music, and … sex.” Really:

Tom seems really uninspired by signing that chick’s rack at the end of the trailer, right? Method acting. As for the rest of this mess, it’s entirely horrific but the movie might find a small to moderate audience who doesn’t mind watching Paul Giamatti and (gasp) Catherine Zeta-Jones debase themselves. As for Russell Brand and Alec Baldwin, however, they’re totally playing versions of their own personas, and Diego Bonita and Julianne Hough sure are pretty.

Now for some more fun with Tom’s plastic surgery face, which some of you doubted in yesterday’s photos of the MI4 Madrid premiere. Indeed, Tom is aging well from a physical standpoint, but his “refreshed” face isn’t merely the product of clean living and lucky genetics. He’s definitely had some very subtle work done by a skilled, highly-paid surgeon. While Tom looks pretty natural in the below photo (from the London premiere of MI4), just hold on tight because sh-t is about to get real in the aftermath.

Now, if there was ever any doubt whether or not Tom’s ever had a facelift (or two or three), check out this picture that Kaiser sent to me (on a bit of a red alert) with a nudge-wink about the strange fold of skin behind Tom’s ear. Indeed, that’s pretty damning evidence of a facelift (or two or three) and undoubtedly the reason why Tom’s been favoring turtlenecks lately:

Doesn’t Tom look like an alien televangelist in these photos? I keep expecting bolts to start popping out of his skin like Xenu Frankenstein or something.

Finally, here are Tom’s special lifts for the brisk London evening. They’re a lot more subtle than usual, aren’t they? Then again, he didn’t really pose next to anyone else on the red carpet this time around. Good plan, Tom.

Photos courtesy of WENN and AllMoviePhoto

 

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94 Responses to “Tom Cruise in the ‘Rock of Ages’ trailer: gloriously painful or not that awful?”

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  1. Eleonor says:

    Tom should give the number of his surgeon to Madonna, she desperatly needs a great surgeon.

  2. Lol says:

    Not to defend Xenu or anything but i have a similar skinfold at the bottom of my ears so i dont think it’s facelift proof.

  3. brin says:

    He looks so much better with short hair.

  4. DreamyK says:

    Horrifying. A cluster f* of stupendous proportions. It makes “Showgirls” look Oscar worthy. Alec Baldwin’s wig. o_O

  5. eny says:

    Shit, I can’t find anything strange in this photo. I’m sure he hadsome chemical peeling or even a face lift (or two or three) but I just don’t see any fold
    skin.

    • gg says:

      I’ve seen some men locally that have had facelifts and there is usually a little line in front of the ear that heals very neatly and becomes invisible in a short time.

      • laurie says:

        I’ve just had an S lift (lower face and neck lift) and the line is actually not in front of the ear. It’s just along the inside, along the ear opening, and is not visible. There is also a line along the back of the ear and into the hair above the ear in the scalp. A skilled surgeon can do magic. I was fortunate to have a wizard.

  6. Jules says:

    He does not look like he had any work done. I still can’t stand him, but he looks natural. Has anyone noticed how off centered his teeth are?

    • theaPie says:

      I’ll try this again without the link because it apparently wasn’t OK (sorry!). Tom was born missing an upper incisor which is sometimes an indication of a genetic defect called holoprosencephaly. It can have pretty detrimental outcomes if it presents severely enough, which is one reason why people theorize that Suri might actually be his brother’s biological child, and why Kidman miscarried.

      On the other hand, I have seen dentists claim that it is not an unusual defect. So who knows.

  7. Kelly says:

    OMFG that movie looks bad. They are very careful not to show TC too closely.

    He’s starting to look like that nutcase that runs Scientology. Can’t remember his name and can’t be bothered to look it up.

  8. Maritza says:

    Botox maybe but not a facelift. I like Tom Cruise,I see nothing wrong with him wanting to look good. Besides, his job depends on his looks.

  9. Jackie says:

    he totally had a lift. you can really tell in the profile pic and that fold of skin makes it so obvious.

    the movie looks nasty.

  10. Love Angie. says:

    Tom Cruise has re arrived with gusto! His Stacee Jaxx performance is a GG nomination lock and with luck he’ll get the “best supporting actor” Oscar nod.

  11. tabbyfoof says:

    Isn’t nonplussed when you’re all freaked out by something?

  12. He looks like he had a “mini” face life…lower only. No work on eyes. Maybe a little botox in forhead.
    Anyway…trailer looks yummy! Can’t wait to see it and relive my heavy metal days!!

  13. GT says:

    I’ll risk having tomatoes thrown at me and say I can’t wait to see this, just because it looks kind of fun!

  14. TXCinderella says:

    Tom Cruise, Rock God? Pfft.

  15. NO SH¡T says:

    It would be hard for me to go watch a movie with him in it because every time I see him I just think of the crazy little man with lifts aka man heels.

  16. Niki says:

    This is a complete Kitsch!

    Brilliant!

    Love it.

    Must see… :) ))

  17. CandyKay says:

    I think the movie looks entertaining. Lighter than air, but entertaining. I wouldn’t go out to the theater for it, but I’d see it on pay-per-view or Redbox.

  18. M3l says:

    Pretty cheesy trailer. Also, Monkey!

    DM had a photo of Tom at the MI4 premiere standing with Richard Hammond, it’s the tallest his ever looked, got a good chuckle from it. ;)

  19. atorontogal says:

    So when he has sex with Katie does he scream Xenu’s name or his own?

  20. LittleDeadGrrl says:

    I’m gonna give Paul Giamatti a pass for being in this movie. He needs some money … Alec is gonna be good too … the rest are gonna bring the whole movie down. They are wasting good Journey music on this shit …

  21. Azurea says:

    Yeah, definitley some surgery — there’s nary a jowl in sight, not even the slightest. His jawline is like cut from stone. And also, he’s botoxed his “11′s.”
    But agree, all done skillfully!

  22. mollie says:

    I saw Rock of Ages on stage with my young adult step kids. They LOVED it. It is really kitschy, raunchy and fun. You won’t strengthen any brain cells but it’s good escapism. I suddenly realized after seeing it live, that Tom Cruise isn’t playing the young “good guy” rock star, he’s playing the D-Bag aging ham that thinks he’s still hot. Perfect Casting! I’m looking forward to seeing it for mindless fun.
    P.S….I can’t stand Tom Cruise.

  23. Sapphire says:

    Not just the fold, there is a clear incision line that has healed-dead give-away!
    You know I don’t have an issue with the whole nip/tuck thing when their job relys on their looks. It’s when the twits lie about it constantly….

  24. sassenach says:

    Catherine Zeta Jones has always been horrible at American accents.

  25. Wif says:

    I just saw a touring company of Rock of Ages, and I honestly don’t think he can pull off Stacey. There’s just not enough David Lee Roth about him.

  26. The Original Mia says:

    That trailer was a waste of 2 mins of my life. Won’t catch me wasting even more time seeing this at the theater or on DVD.

  27. Heine says:

    It looks fun and silly. Definitely looks entertaining but then I love musicals with dance numbers and huge set pieces. Add cheesy 80s music and comedy and you have a winner in my opinion.

    I don’t think Tom has had a facelift. I have a skin fold down at the bottom of my ear and there is nothing there that looks like a scar healed over.

    Now, he does look like he gets regular facials and peels and maybe Botox in key areas. His face doesn’t have that ‘pulled tight’ look that you get from a facelift. He does, however, have the ‘refreshed’ look you get from a peel and maybe Botox.

  28. Sapphire says:

    Look at the 2nd pic, in profile- healed incision line right below the fold. Gotta admit that surgeon is GOOD-he put the incision as far down as possible.

  29. Cathy says:

    I still say he has a squatty body.

  30. Jackson says:

    I have no idea how TC is going to fit into this movie because I do not see him in this role at all….but I will quietly admit that the movie looked fun and funny to me. I just hope the soundtrack isn’t all covered by TC or that might just ruin it for me.

  31. Palermo says:

    Doesn’t look like he’s had any work? He’s had at least one nosejob, maybe two and of course he’s had some other facial work done.

  32. Scarlet Pimpernel says:

    I guess the question is can actors who often take themselves too seriously and who we enjoy laughing at suddenly turn the tables on the public and invite us to laugh at them on purpose. Does this take the fun out of it or in fact become a bit of light-hearted fun? I’ll reserve judgement until I see the movie on this one.

  33. Jilly Bean says:

    god that preview gave me douche chills…. shudder

  34. kikilo says:

    That trailer — so much cheesy goodness! Can’t wait to relive my teen years!

    Tom really lost me when he descended into full-blown Zenu-ness, but he’s lookin’ good I must say.

  35. Mia says:

    He looks fabulous and the movie looks fun. I’m a sucker for a sing along at the movies.

  36. blonde on the dock says:

    I don’t think he’s had any work done. My husband is around the same age and looks this good. Better looking and taller than Tommy Boy of course.

  37. theaPie says:

    Damn, in that sixth photo down, he looks alarming like a guy I am dating. I never noticed.

  38. Str8Shooter says:

    I hope this and that execrable-looking ‘Ghost Protocol’ thing tanks at the box office.

    Never has there been such a megalomanical closet case like this guy.

  39. Darla says:

    Me and musicals don’t mix…but there is something charmingly ridiculous about it that I like.

  40. Malificent says:

    The thing that makes me the most nutty is Catherine Z-J’s atrocious American, vaguely Texan, accent? She’s played tons of American roles, she’s got the bazillions for an accent coach, she’s married to an American, she’s spent umpteen years of her life in the US or around Americans, and her accent is still not even passable. If I had her resources, I’d be giving Meryl Streep a run for her money in the Accent category.

  41. Turtle Dove says:

    Umm… I think this one is going to tank. Music of a generation? Whose? Glad he did it and all; it must have been a fun movie to make, but I’m not paying to listen to music I don’t even like on the radio (and I gave up listening to the radio when iPods came out!).

    PS – Tom’s still looking great though.

  42. Happy21 says:

    I LOVE 80′s glam-hair metal/rock. I think this looks like a blast! Not an academy award winner or anything but a lot of fun to watch. I HATE Tom Cruise but I’m gonna see it.

  43. FeFeLaRue says:

    ONE QUESTION?? WHy do you HATE Tom Cruise so much?? I’m just wondering because your reporting on him has gone from somewhat humorous to down right mean &and nasty over the past few months. What has this man done to you?

    He loves his family, you don’t see him out there cheating (ala Ashton) or abusing drugs or doing anything really so bad that he deserves all this HATE!! Like I don’t get it? What cause he believes in something different than you?? IDK…you people!

    I am a HUGE Tom Cruise fan and have no proble with a little poking fun but you Sir/Mamdame are a true B*tch!! You need to stop!!

    It’s becoming unhealthy and just SAD!!!

  44. Amanda G says:

    Wow…how they mighty have fallen…. That looks terrible.

  45. Dibba says:

    He makes my skin crawl. Too bad any acting ability or appear he might have is overshadowed for me by his freakish family, cult and his own egotistical self to the point that I can’t look at him.

  46. Andie B says:

    He is gorgeous..always has been. I know he’s strange, but he’s still good looking. It was the movie Cocktail that did it for me.

  47. 2cents says:

    For the record, I don’t care for Tom Cruise. Not that I haven’t adored some of his movies, or enjoyed his Alpha male antics from time to time. He just isn’t my cup of tea on an average day. However I will be the first to admit that he looks fantastic! Either he has gotten the best bed in the world and is getting better sleep than the rest of us, OR the scar that appears to be under his ear on the fourth picture down on this page (http://www.celebitchy.com/197087/tom_cruise_at_the_madrid_mi4_premiere_does_he_have_the_best_plastic_surgeon_ever/) is just that… a scar from a very well done facelift.

  48. Camille says:

    That movie looks god awful. Is it a comedy? Because Catherine ZJ’s acting alone is terrible and horribly campy/cheesy.
    This movie looks like a ‘must miss’.

  49. Thea says:

    I think he is bat shit crazy. But he does look good for his age. I wonder if he jumps any couches in this, because it looks like a hot freaking mess. And Catherine Z J must have went off the lithium on this one.

  50. LondonLady says:

    It looks…frigging…awesome. Enough said

  51. lisa says:

    I don’t Tom has had any work. Just like with women a different hairstyle/color can shave years off.

    Tom has always looked younger than his age. I think he looks really good.

    the trailer is a bit off for me. NOT into all that singing. Catherine and that other girl irritate me. So I don’t think I’ll see it in a theater.

  52. LibsW says:

    OMG I just looked back at the pics of him rocking out on the balcony and I swear I must have laughed so hard a little bit of wee came out….

  53. maeir says:

    I’m not saying that Tom Cruise hasn’t had any work done but when I look up like that I have the same little wrinkle behind/underneath my ear and I have definitely never had a facelift, let alone two or three, or any plastic surgery for that matter.

    Gotta get better evidence.

  54. gab says:

    Oh, tiny, toxic Tom – Go Away. And take your “awesome” wife with you.

  55. Kathy says:

    Having been madly in love with the New World Stages production of the musical, btw the cast was superb, I can confidently say that this film will stink! Every actor is sorely miscast. If you shuffled them, they might have worked. Brand as Stacee, Cruise as Dennis, Baldwin as Lonnie. Maybe. But the thing that made the play work was Lonnie as the narrator who breaks the third wall and cracks all the satirical musical references. This movie is just going to be bad. Plus, this is the worst mis-casting of Cruise since Lestat. Blech!

  56. cruiz2 says:

    He’ll never tell, but he does look better. I like the trailer. I’m an 80′s girl and movie looks like nostalgia fun, same age as Tom. Bet he gets great reviews. Sorry.

  57. Val says:

    Hmmm….looks like they’re poking a little fun at Motley Crue. Should have used some Crue music in the film.

  58. Cheepcheep4 says:

    You guys talking about his face lift also realize he’s wearing a LOAD of really well applied makeup in these shots, right? Face lifts don’t make your skin glow and contour your cheek bones with bronzer….

    Not saying one way or the other on the lift (probably, though), just sayin’ he’s also wearing a metric butt-ton of makeup too.

  59. Amjp says:

    Cruise has always been a handsome great looking guy.

  60. al rotundo says:

    STINKEROO BOMB OF THE YEAR! This film will appeal neither to the baby boomers who suffered through the ugly 80s nor to the kids who go to metal concerts now – (but at least Cruise has found a role worthy of his talent LOL)