Melissa McCarthy at the Oscars: she should have hosted instead of Billy Crystal

Except for Rose Byrne and Kristen Wiig, I didn’t like the Bridesmaid’s cast’s dresses last night. I thought that Maya Rudolph and Melissa McCarthy were particularly ill dressed. But first let’s not focus on that. Kaiser e-mailed me that Melissa McCarthy should have hosted last night, and I agree and add that the rest of the Bridesmaids cast could have played supporting roles. I’ll be honest, I found last night interminable, and you know that I love to see the celebrities and gossip about them.

The Academy went too far on the “safe” side with the staid and predictable Billy Crystal, but it wasn’t necessarily his fault. They need to make the show tighter, to move the secondary awards to another broadcast, and to have a more consistent message. I loved the rare segments featuring the celebrities talking about what movies and their careers meant to them, that was touching, but they were few and far between. There were several bizarre filler videos (starring Crystal, natch) that didn’t make sense and weren’t on the “old Hollywood” (meh) message that they were going for. The intro video was like a high production “Sit Back and Relax, Enjoy The Show!” video that you get at budget theater chains. (Crystal riding in on a big film reel? That’s like the industry’s equivalent of a spinning globe.) Billy made some mildly funny jokes about the economy and the “your name here/Chapter 11″ Kodak theater, but my eyes were glassing over almost the entire three hours. Plus the secondary video feeds available from the Oscar website and iPad app were similarly uninteresting, I checked them a few times. Ok, I’m obviously still grumpy that I had to sit through all that and mess up my whole sleep schedule, so I’ll work on being less annoyed. ha!

I’ll say one more thing – which is what I’ve said since I saw it. The best recent year was 2009 when Hugh Jackman hosted and they designed a more intimate theater with goofy musical numbers. They need to stick with that formula. /rant.

So the Bridesmaids cast introduced a few awards last night, and they were funnier and much more clever than Crystal could ever be. Kristen Wiig and Maya Rudolph went on an extended riff on p3nis size when introducing the winner for Best Short Film. We needed more jokes like this last night. The Academy gave us a whole minute to embed, below, which I guess they consider generous even with a half minute commercial preceding it.

Later, when Rose Byrne and Melissa McCarthy were presenting, someone from the audience shouted “Scorsese!” and they took swigs from mini vodka bottles! This was a joke started at the SAGs with their Martin Scorsese drinking game, so obviously the producers of the Oscars took notice and accommodated it again. (Unless Wiig and co. had to remind them and ask permission to do the bit again, which is also possible.) So why, for the love of God, did no one consider the Bridesmaids casts as hosts this year?

Ok, on to the fashion. Maya Rudolph’s dress was just bad. The fit was off, the style was gaudy and I found it blah. I noticed while watching Tim Gunn’s that when he was interviewing women whose dresses he disliked he never asked them the designer name. This happened with both J.Lo and Maya Rudolph. He had a pat question asking everyone about what their fashion secret was, and Maya said it was “So much shapewear, I could support the shapewear business.” That was funny and honest. She was in a custom Johanna Johnson gown and the back was actually prettier than the front. (Not that it would have worked either way.) The color was nice though.

Wendi McLendon-Covey was in Semi-Couture (I think that’s what she said!). It’s not a bad dress, but the color and the style are way too “princess Barbie.”

Ellie Kemper was in sequin formfitting Armani Prive with Lorraine Schwartz jewels. She told Ryan Secrest “I love what I’m wearing” and described the color as “glittery rust.” It’s a little too matchy with her hair for me, but it’s a stunning gown overall.

Melissa McCarthy really did not bring it last night. She had on custom Marina Rinaldi. She explained to Seacrest that Brian Atwood made her handbag and shoes, and wrote a message to her on the shoes! She said she’s been friends with Atwood since high school. I thought that story was really sweet. This dress is not flattering in cut and is doing something weird in the boob area. It looks like a double-boob sling. Plus it’s just not a pretty dress. Now if McCarthy had hosted, she would have had a team of stylists and a handful of gorgeous dresses to wear last night. Oh that would have been something.

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48 Responses to “Melissa McCarthy at the Oscars: she should have hosted instead of Billy Crystal”

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  1. Ravensdaughter says:

    Wild woman! Must see “Bridesmaids” now.

  2. Marianne says:

    Billy was pretty boring. I say bring back Hugh Jackman as host.

    I actually kind of like Melissa’s dress. Probably my favourite of hers from this whole award season.

    I really liked Ellie’s dress. Not that crazy on the bangs though.

  3. Samigirl says:

    Melissa cracked me up last night with her little robe and sparkly platform bit :) And, unlike Billy Crystal, her forehead actually moved!

  4. Maya says:

    Considering that Bridesmaids wasn’t even nominated for Best Picture, having the cast host the show might have been a bit awkward.

  5. eileen says:

    I don’t watch the award shows because I just can’t with celeb egos. I don’t think they need a show dedicated to them about their craft. But I love reading all the posts on CB about the dresses and just read if I missed anything too fab. Seems like I made a wise choice again this year watching The Walking Dead.

  6. Asli says:

    I only watched the opening singing montage and my god was Billy horrible.

  7. Aiobhan says:

    I think Elle has the best dress in this bunch of photos. I agree that it is a little matchy.
    I cannot hate on Wendi because she was awesome on Reno 911. It is princessy but it works in a really odd way for me.

    Chris Rock should have hosted again. I loved his bit during when he presented his award. But I would not have been mad if Melissa had hosted. Billy was not that bad for me. Agree that he was safe but I liked what he did.

    • Kara Ann says:

      Swear I’m not stalking you but this is the second post of yours that I agree with completely.
      Loved Elle’s dress
      Thought Crystal was fine
      Would love Chris Rock to host
      And lastly, thanks for pointing Wendi is from Reno 911. I hadn’t placed her before. I agree I’d give her a pass on her princess dress.

      • Aiobhan says:

        Lol. I have my pepper spray ready just in case. I have been posting like a loon today because it is my day off. Hopefully I am not overstaying my welcome.

        Reno 911 was one of the funniest and silliest tv shows that was cancelled and should not have been. Arrested Development being the other one.

  8. normades says:

    I love Maya so much that I wish she could get it right just once.

  9. jess says:

    I enjoyed Billy as a host. Safe, yes, but enjoyable. And I didn’t like the movie star clips. But I agree – the Bridesmaids as hosts would have been great. Btw, loved Ellis’s dress but she was the only one with a good dress.

  10. TruthTella says:

    The most annoying thing for me was Kelly Osbourne licking Melissa’s ass on the coverage saying how great she looked and praising her figure blah blah blah and you know she’ll be back to calling (1/4 the size) Christina Aguilera a fat c**t any day now.

  11. embertine says:

    I must be one of the only people that actually likes Melissa’s dress. I thought the neckline was at an off level but I loved the fabric and the glittery clasp things.

    Maya’s dress was close to being lovely but it just doesn’t dress her boobs right. It gave her a frontage, more like a steam cruiser than a bustline. On the other hand, she rocks and I love the purple.

  12. MorticiansDoItDeader says:

    I watched the last hour (because I couldn’t miss Jon Berenthal in The Walking Dead), and thought Melissa looked great. Michelle Williams was also a standout.

  13. NM6804 says:

    - Crystal was fine. Safe, bland but enjoyable. I want Degeneres back :) .

    - If you are going to make peen jokes, at least make them funny.

    - The dresses: only Kempers’ one is exciting. Agreed on the too matchy with the hair though. Rudolph was ok, too simplistic but not atrocious at all.

  14. AudreyS says:

    I just don’t get all the positive comments about Bridesmaids. I saw it and thought it was awful.

  15. Shelly says:

    Melissa’s dress was terrible. Totally the wrong color for her. And I know she’s a heavy woman, but they didn’t have to dress her in a fat-lady dress. They could have created something beautifully tailored that would have made her look amazing.

  16. Girl says:

    Melissa McCarthy had THE best dimples.

  17. Tiffany says:

    I thought that Crystal was great last night. I know it is a standby, but I look forward to when he hosts(his Scorcese thought was great). But one of my favorites over the past few years has been Hugh, Chris and Steve. I would even like Martin Short to host.

  18. Ari says:

    I love Melissa’s dress but it resembles a period gown so anything like that thrills me.

  19. francesca says:

    The Oscars need MORE peen jokes? Are you serious? Because that is who we are at our best as artists and filmmakers. Grow up.

    • LAK says:

      Couldn’t agree more. I read with dismay how everyone wants more peen jokes or Billy Crystal was very boring..never mind how witty he was when he ad libbed. No one can ad lib like Billy.

      The thing is,we all complain that comedy these days is all peen jokes, we complain that it is unfunny, and then when presented with a masterclass with no peen jokes, we complain.

      And i whilst i love Mellisa McCarthy, i also found her vulgar and crass in that skit she did with Billy.

      And Please will someone explain to me why BRIDESMAIDS is funny. All i saw were sex and pooping jokes.

      when did we get so vulgar. Is that the standard now?

      I bet WHEN HARRY MET SALLY would never be made these days. No peen/farting/pooping jokes there!

  20. Pedge says:

    Love the dress, HATE the color of it.

  21. Turd Fergussen says:

    I’m a big girl, too — about Melissa’s size. And girlfriend, WE CANNOT WEAR DRESSES LIKE THAT. She needs to take a lesson from Octavia Spencer, who always managed to look great because she wore clothes that were tailored to fit. All that wispy fabric everywhere on Melissa, those horrible sleeves, the color…yech. It’s too bad, because she’s a beautiful woman and so damned talented. She just needs a good stylist who’s worked with plus sized women before. (Not that there are any in Hollywood.)

  22. Susie Q says:

    Melissa looked horrible. The stylist who dressed her said she liked it better than any gown she had ever worn before. Maya needed a bra, or if she was wearing one, a better one.

    • anonymoose says:


      She mighta been a great host, and I’d like to find out. But she can never ever use this stylist again. That dress is the color of barf. And if that’s not bad enough, the fabric draping makes it look like a barf colored Hefty bag gathered with rhinestone rubberbands.

      Melissa is so much better than this dress.

      The hairstyling and earrings are also missteps. Too bad the ensemble cast didn’t coordinate their looks better as a group.

    • Fatkid says:

      When they interviewed her stylist he said she basically designed. He made it pretty clear that it was her choice, not his.

  23. Ramona Q says:

    Jennifer Aniston ought to color her hair like Kristen Wiig’s. I can imagine it, and it looks great.

  24. Amanda G says:

    ITA that Hugh Jackman was the best host in recent years. Billy was predictable and quite awful. I felt like it was 1995 again. The only good part was the “What are they thinking?”

    I’m glad you explained the drinking bit because I didn’t get it. It was funny and I assumed it was a drinking game but I didn’t know that it was from the SAG awards.

    I think Tina Fey should host. She’s always a great presenter.

  25. anonymoose says:

    The years Hugh Jackman hosted? terrible!
    That’s as bad as last year’s mess, only with more singing numbers. GAH.

    Never understood why a show this long and tedious would be made longer and senselessly more tedious with song/dance numbers. This isn’t the Tony Awards.

    The Cirque du Soleil performance was molto bene! THAT was a SHOW. They got it just right.

    I may be the only one who thinks so, but the year Jon Stewart hosted was one of my favorites. Smart and funny, with a sense of both mischief and decency. I’m sure he’ll never host again, especially after bringing Marketa Irglova out to finish her speech…Best Oscar Moment EVER.

    Billy Crystal is always the same formula, and does a capable okay job.

    • OriginalTiffany says:

      8 months a year Cirque has Iris in the Kodak Theater. Cirque also did part of the Super Bowl half-time. They are doing more one-show performances these days.
      IRIS is a good show, I saw it a few months back while we were between cities.
      I’ll have to youtube the performances. I’ve only seen a couple little clips.
      I’d like to see Seth McFarlane host or Joel McHale. The Oscars are always boring.

  26. Maritza says:

    Melissa’s dress would’ve looked better in black, she looks huge and the color didn’t help. I love Ellen Kemper’s rust sequin dress, it is gorgeous!

  27. Lola6 says:

    Personally, I think she looks hideous. It makes her look even bigger. The color is all wrong too.