Lindsay Lohan’s appearance on ‘SNL’ is critically panned: how did she really do?

As you probably know, Lindsay Lohan had her crackie extravaganza last night on Saturday Night Live. Comeback! Sobriety! Work! Talent! I actually slept through this, so I’m just going to put up some of the video “highlights”. I checked with Entertainment Weekly, and they say that Lohan wasn’t even that heavily featured in most of the skits, and her “reliance” on cue cards became “excruciating”. Other TV critics have also panned Lohan’s appearance. Here’s a funny/sad thought: while Lohan’s cracked-out shenanigans and addiction issues have played out over the past six years, everyone always said, “But she was talented, it’s such a pity.” What if she never really was as talented as people remember? Anyway, some highlights:

This is the cold open which is Lohan-free. It’s pretty funny, though, mostly because Bill Hader specializes in playing the freakiest bastards and his Shep Smith is hilarious.

Here’s Lohan’s opening monologue. They “joke” about her SCRAM, how she’s probably carrying drugs on her person, and how dilated her pupils are. There are special appearances by Jimmy Fallon AND JON HAMM. The Hamm has been tainted by The Cracken!!!! Ugh.

Here’s the “Sacred Straight” skit where LL plays herself. Why does that get applause? Her crack-face looks weird here, and the skit is not good.

This is the “Rude Buddha” skit. Is this offensive to Buddhists? And Lindsay should no longer be able to play “the hot girl,” right?

You know what sucks about this SNL gig? Lindsay is using this to get more work. On Saturday, Page Six reported that Lindsay is now lining up some films – she’s “joining the cast” of a “sexual thriller” directed by Johan Renck, who is best known for music videos. You can read more about it here – it doesn’t say that the Cracken has officially signed on for anything, though. It’s probably just a rumor.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet & SNL.

 

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223 Responses to “Lindsay Lohan’s appearance on ‘SNL’ is critically panned: how did she really do?”

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  1. Asli says:

    Honestly, I don’t think she’s suited for movies anymore. Unless she’s in a film about Donatella Versace. She’s just ruined her face – no one wants to see a 25 year old – 25!!! – looking permanently haggard.

    I think she was talented in the Disney kind of way. You know, like Miley Cyrus, Vanessa Hudgens, Ashley Tisdale are talented. Not great but not bad either.

    • Jeneral says:

      Talented in a Disney kind of way isn’t saying much at all about an actor’s ability. That means they can read and repeat dialogue in something other than a monotone.

      Lindsay is so OVER. I watched the whole thing and yes, the material wasn’t great, but she did an AWFUL job. I have a feeling that the writers may not have bothered to bring their best work to the table for this crackie ho because… really, why bother?

      It was seriously embarrassing to watch her smirk her way through each skit just kind of standing there awkwardly, obviously looking off camera for cues. Her delivery was stale and amateurish. Her timing was based only on when others stopped talking and you could literally see her thinking “oh, he stopped talking, that means it’s my turn… oh shit, what was I supposed to say?!”

      She is so pathetic, so shameless, and it’s so blatantly obvious she’s doing this all because she LOVES having a camera on her and all the attention. It’s all about the attention.

      I am, however, PISSED at Jon Hamm. What the hell! Why was he there, for backup star power??

    • Aiobhan says:

      Ryan Gosling was a Disney kid and he has now gone on to be so much bigger than any of the other Disney kids that I know of other than Justin T. And even then in comparison he is way more talented. I am not arguing with you about Lohan though. Also, Jon really has nothing to do until mad Men Starts up again. He was funny to me.
      I agree that she had a modicum of talent and a lot of potential that if nurtured properly could have turned into something good… eventually. But last night’s show was further proof that this girl is done until she cleans up her act. Which I do not think is every going to happen. I think he disgusting behavior has overshadowed any potential that she has left. We feel sorry for her and over exaggerate her talent to the point where we have started “misremembering” things.

    • Alix says:

      I’m still trying to figure out why a 25-year-old would want face-fillers. She hardly looked gaunt.

      • Cas says:

        Can someone please explain to me what is happening to her chin!?? I see it in every candid photo of her and it seems to be getting worse! Are the face fillers somehow giving her a really strange looking double chin, what’s up with that? It is amazing how much better she looks (actually quite stunning), in the promo shots where they have worked some Photoshop magic.

    • Newtsgal says:

      I don’t think he was there for Blohan, it was more likely to promote his new movie which also has SNL cast in it.
      As for Fallon, he was in the building anyways…

    • anniewho says:

      she was terrible. the skits were dreadful. SNL should be revamped! although I do love all the regular cast of the show, they make the most of the horrible writing and poor story lines. Lindsay, please go away. you are really really burnt out and unappealing on so many levels. what is going on with your face woman? and those god awful bleach blond extensions?

  2. logan says:

    bless her heart, she can still read.

  3. sm255 says:

    Okay: I thought she did pretty decent on my part. The only skit where I thought she was bad was in the Jail skit with Keenan, with The Wandering Eyes, haha. However, I knew that the SNL cast worked off of cue cards anyways, so it wasn’t such a BIG deal to me. Just that they make it MORE discrete.

    However, the episode was BAD. I cannot even blame that poor girl at this point. The WRITING of that episode was godawful. Rape jokes? Really SNL? Since when did they stop being funny? Granted this was the first time I ever watched them in 10 or so years but still!

    Also, they put her in the scenes, but they actually haven’t USED her. She didn’t have much lines, but it looked like she did work with what they gave her. And her energy on the show looked pretty nice, so I’m giving her a B on effort. At least she showed up, at least she gave some effort and I hope this was a learning experience telling her that these are baby steps she’s taking. So yeah, at least she’s trying.

    Well, off to wait for her next project: Elizabeth Taylor biopic on Lifetime!

    • ShazBot says:

      okay, that’s the point though – they didn’t give her very many lines and she still didn’t know them. contrast to Daniel Radcliffe a few weeks ago, who knew all his lines and was spot on with timing. The writing this season hasn’t been great, and they re-played some pre-recorded spots last night, which was weird. I’m wondering if they ended up cancelling some skits because of the trouble she was clearly having, and just played old stuff instead.

      • sm255 says:

        Pffft, don’t give me that Daniel Radcliffe bullsh*t, even HE didn’t save the show apparently: not a lot of people found the Hogwarts parody funny. It was tired and tried out, even as it was put out so soon after the Harry Potter movies ended.

        And if that was the case with her, she was probably either: a) Nervous or b) distracted. It happens. Ever heard of when one of the (legendary) three Barrymores had to call out for a line on stage because one of them couldn’t remember it and thus couldn’t go on with the rest of the two? I’m just saying that it happens that an actor (or actress, in this case) can flub with their lines. Trust me, I KNOW. XD

      • ShazBot says:

        a) are you comparing LINDSAY LOHAN to legendary stage actors??? I’m sorry, but being in some Disney movies 10 years ago does not qualify her for that. She needs to build an actual career before she can start pulling diva moves, because there are countless young actresses behind her who will put in the hard work and have not messed up their faces.

        b) I’m not saying the writing on Daniel’s SNL was great, I’m saying he was prepared and he put in the work, and that shows that he took it seriously and didn’t spend all week telling everyone about his appearance without actually putting any work into his appearance.

        I’m all for Lindsay working her way back, but I just don’t think she knows how to WORK.

      • sm255 says:

        @Shazbot

        A) I wasn’t even comparing them – I only used the Barrymores as an example that not all stage, movie or even comedic actors (and actresses) can know their lines off the bat. They have their moments. And of course Lindsay will have to work her ass off to get where she wants to go. I only see this as just the beginning for her. She has other ‘proposed’ projects to go.

        B) Of course he put in a lot of effort and hard work into his performance – does not excuse the fact that it was a poor episode with cringeworthy writing. Same for Lindsay. Like I said, at least she gave SOME effort.

        And she should know how to work, based on her history as a child actress. But as I said, right now these are just baby steps for her and I hope she can take it easy and not rush through new projects like crazy, trying to win everybody’s love and approval. It’s impossible, there are people purposely looking for her to fail and fall onto her ass, but I hope she’s actually matured enough to learn that she cannot please everyone and just work with what she’s got.

      • polk8dot says:

        @Sm255
        I find it hysterically ironic that you are trying to excuse Lilo’s lack of professionalism, preparedness and work ethic but comparing her to the Barrymores – the most notorious ‘theater/screen’ acting family, probably in Hollywood history, whose EVERY SINGLE member spent their personal and professional lives fighting addiction, alcoholism, etc. and generally wasting their lives away.
        By that comparison, Lilo’s getting a single line out correctly sounds like a huge accomplishment. Way to shoot for the stars…

        As to SNL not being funny – yeah, sadly that ship has sailed about 10 years ago. The show that used to be on the foreront of political, economic and social commentary turned into a loose collection of disparate skits, with no flow, no humor, no intelligence, and NO FUN!
        I watched and loved SNL for years, but I stopped watching about 11 years ago, and only see maybe 2-3 min from an episode maybe once every 6 months. The opening gags and the News Update used to be the funniest parts of the show, now they are just mundane, used up, tired – and still remain the best parts of the show. That tells you right there…

      • LeeLoo says:

        @Shazbot Exactly! Short of a few episodes (mainly Betty White episode) the show hasn’t been the same since Tina Fey left the writing room. No one is going to deny that.
        However, every host needs to be prepared to do great. You cannot blame Lindsay’s poor preformance on the writing. People (such as Daniel Radcliffe and many. others) have been able to take the crappy material they are given and turn it into something else. That’s what talented actors do. Lindsay did none of that. She must think that if she sits there and looks cute and reasonably sober she will get movie roles. It doesn’t work that way anymore. There are a million girls in front of Londsay and a million girls behind Lindsay. She’s a washed up has been and she proved exactly why last night.

      • spiderpig says:

        @sm255 ….hey everybody its mama cracken!!

      • Veruca says:

        I just love Daniel Radcliffe. I want a Daniel Radcliffe that I can keep in my pocket.

        He’ll fit, right?

    • sm255 says:

      @polkadot:

      Hey, I didn’t say that the Barrymores were spotless and clean, but their work was notable. They had their MOMENTS – that was my highlight in mentioning them in the firs place. And like I said – these are baby steps for Lindsay. BABY STEPS.

      Plus, I found it hysterically ironic that you cannot spell ‘hysterically’ for your own life.

      • Zelda says:

        I don’t think “irony” means what you think it means.

      • sm255 says:

        Oh really?

        I only found it ironic (in a humorous, taunting way) that she couldn’t even aggrieve herself to spell-check her post.

        Try again.

      • Newtsgal says:

        @sm255
        * your writing*
        ” that was my highlight in mentioning them in the firs place”
        That more than makes my case for not everybody spells correctly all of the time….
        Lighten up!

      • Kate #2 says:

        @sm255 – you need to Google the definition of aggrieve.

        Ironically enough.

      • sm255 says:

        @newtsgal: It’s called a typo. Ever heard of it?

        @Kate #2: Of course I know what aggrieve is, darling. I’m not stupid.

      • Newtsgal says:

        Guess your spell check didn’t pick that one up….
        Your so quick to point out everybody elses short comings in grammar. You don’t like it when it’s pointed out to you.
        Like I said before LIGHTEN UP!

      • Kate #2 says:

        @sm255 – if you know what it means, then why did you completely misuse it?

        It doesn’t mean bother or make the effort. It means maltreat, distress, do wrong to. In context it makes no sense.

        Look, everyone makes mistakes with their English at times. That’s the point; why nitpick someone else when your own isn’t perfect either? When someone does that, all I can think is they have no good rebuttal to the substantive argument.

        I don’t like it when people slam Lohan too hard – wish death on her – because appalling as her behaviour is she’s so plainly an addict, and so plainly let down by her parents at a time when she needed them. But defending someone who isn’t doing the work to rehabilitate themselves is pointless unless you acknowledge that failure on their part. She’s not Drew Barrymore, because DB faced what she’d become, accepted what she needed to do to overcome people’s impressions of her, and knuckled down and got on with it. She earned her current position in Hollywood, and while I agree that she and Lohan were equally let down by the people who were supposed to love them, the fact is that Lohan needs to do the time, too. Thus far, there’s no sign of it.

        The people you cite all worked their arses off to regain trust and rebuild their careers. They blew trust and had to earn it all over again. You seem to think she should be able to say, “okay, all better now! I’m back!” It just doesn’t work that way.

    • sm255 says:

      @Zelda: You want to know how that was ironic.

      Okay. Let me break it down to you so that you can understand what I was saying.

      This person types to me her explanation on why my comment about Lohan flubbing her lines is ‘hystirically ironic’, whereas her misspelling had dispelled all of the credit and seriousness I can take in the rest of her comment. In other words, type more intelligently and be more careful before you try to argue against my claim – so that, later on, you’ll never have to wonder why people didn’t take you so seriously.

      That’s what I found ‘ironic’ – that this person expected me to take her seriously, but her grammar makes her seem not so serious.

      And there you go.

    • Robbie says:

      I dont think its good enough to pat her on her back because she tried and at least showed up. SNL shouldn’t be a charity for wayward child stars. To be honest there are thousands of hardworking, talented actors out there who take their job seriously. When i watch her so obviously read off cue cards i am left with the impression that she is ill prepared and does not respect her craft at all. If she attempted a come back and appeared to be taking things seriously i would feel more supportive.

      • crazycatlady says:

        Great point about SNL. At first I thought maybe Lorne was just trying to help Pillow Face out. But then I realized that no – L McCracken was sure to boost ratings regardless of how good or bad she’d be. Though I think it was her last time on SNL, for sure.

  4. Pont Neuf says:

    I don’t see why she shouldn’t be given another chance to build a successful career.

    Sean Penn and Robert Downey Jr were infamous in Hollywood for their multiple addictions and delusions of grandeur and yet, they have never stopped getting work, no one has ever questioned their talent and, today, they are seen as these ‘tormented souls’, ‘incredibly deep’ “intellectuals” (HA!) and ‘serious actors’.

    OK, Lohan hasn’t made the best choices. Neither have many others who have done far worse and are forgiven because… Well, I guess they have better publicists than Lindsay (poor Sandra Bullock, who “didn’t know anything about her Nazi-apologist CHEATER husband who CHEATED on AMERICA’S SWEETHEART”, anyone?).

    As for SNL, it’s always been a hit or miss show, so not all of the blame should fall on her.

    • Denise says:

      She IS being given second, third, fourth, chances! And she blows it every time. And a talent like Sean Penn and Robert Downey Jr. she is not, so she should be beside herself with gratitude that she can still get work.

    • Dani says:

      Yes and RDJ also did some serious jail time and came out a changed man, admitting his drug addiction. Have you ever seen Lohan even admit she has a serious problem? This is why people are so fed up w/her. She has not been held accountable by the legal system and owns no responsibility for all her crap. It is way past being an old story. Personally I hope she does clean up her act but I could care less whether I ever see her on the small or big screen ever again.

    • mln76 says:

      RDJ was nominated for an Oscar and in several critically acclaimed movies BEFORE his breakdown. Lindsay doesn’t have a performance like Chaplin that people can look to that shows some grand talent.
      Penn as much as I can’t stand him has left his dramatic personal life off of his movies sets and is always professional.
      Lindsay was never all that. She just said in a coked out bravado that she wanted to win an Oscar by 30 that’s not the same thing as being talented.

    • polk8dot says:

      It is not a valid comparison in any way, setting Hohan against the example of RDJ and/or Sean Penn.
      These two actors have already become HUGE stars, not to mention great actors who could play pretty much anything and make it compelling, interesing, worth watching, by the time they let their demons take over their lives completely. They also had family and friends who recognized that they needed help, forced them to take it, and then supported them, not the least by springing for insurance on early ‘clean’ projects when nobody would insure the production. They’ve been paid back hundredfold. And, most of all, RDJ and SP both accepted personal responsibility, made amends, acknowledged teir wrongdoings, and corrected their life-course.
      All Hohan ever did was get lucky in a nice kiddie comedy when she was what,5-6? And then got lucky again to find support in Tina Fey in ‘Mean Girls’. These are really the ONLY TWO movies that she got any recognition for, any acclaim, and even in them she was nothing special (Dakota Fanning or even Abigail Breslin would have danced cirlces around Lilo’s ‘performance’).
      Sice then she has not shown her ‘talent’ once, has never risen to that lauded ‘potential’ (lauded most vehemently by herself, no less). She played opposite Meryl Streep, Lily Tomlin and Jane Fonda, FFS. And still she was unable to parlay that into any sort of a lasting employment or ‘career’.
      Come to think of it, she made it her life’s work to always be on the lookout for that next Phoenix, for that next role that was going to show everybody her ‘tremendous Oscar-caliber talent’. Please! This girl could not act her way out of a brown paper bag if her life depended on it. She does not care about acting, about working, about learning.
      She craves, and only cares about, getting accolades, going to premieres, giving interviews, being photographed and generally being adored and idolized – Lord knows for what!??
      She has ZERO TALENT, non-existent work ethic, completely lacks any self-awareness, and is a lazy, spoiled, entitled POS who can’t back up her demands and promises with any real talent and dedication. And that is what makes her different from RDJ and SP, and why SHE WILL NEVER BE SUCCESSFUL AGAIN.

      • Blue says:

        Omg yes. Everything you said.
        *standing ovation*

      • LeeLoo says:

        Here’s the argument against using RDJ as an example. RDJ was always a humble person, even in the throes of his addiction. He never wasted our time with lies and excuses. For him, it was one day he was sober and the next day he wasn’t. He never asked for another chance, people were willing to give him one and he was willing to go back to basics and work his way back up. RDJ was always professional and never had a bad attitude in whatever he worked on. To this day he has always been honest and forthright about what went on in those years. He was a good person who had a horrible addiction.

        Lindsay on the other hand is everything Robert Downey Jr is not. She EXPECTS to be given more chances and she is far from humble. I would even go as far as to say she is narcissistic. No one wants to work with her or help her out because she refuses to help herself. I’m sure much of it has to do with the inflated ego her mom built her up to have. However, lets face it she has nothing further to add to the table. The only thing she has done is taken away from the table with her constant drama and bad attitude.

      • Jo 'Mama' Besser says:

        I don’t understand where this sexism is supposed to be. Frankly, I find it be a bit of a cop-out. How is it that she, who has spent all of eleven minutes in jail and rehab is getting a raw deal over someone like RDJ, who totally got what was coming to him when they bounced him into the slammer to serve out an actual sentence? I didn’t feel bad for him then, or now for it. You know the risks, you know the costs and once in a while the system works in both society’s favour and your own. Isn’t he a good example of that? Why couldn’t that work for someone like Lindsay–who is still young? You break the law and theoretically the law comes back for you. It got him, why isn’t it allowed to get her? Because she’s a fragile woman who should never have to exercise her free will because girls are delicate and even when they get special treatment that’s not enough because of um, patriarchy, or–no, the beauty myth– with a teaspoon of um…hegemony, maybe…primogeniture, no, maybe perhaps…ooh remember that Boston Molasses Disaster? It was totally sexist because molasses is sweet and women are supposed to be ‘sweet’, so they took our ‘label’ and used it against us. As a minority, I don’t know whether I should be offended because it was the black sugar AGAIN (probably a setup engineered by the Fondant Front) getting all of the blame (of course), or happy that it wasn’t the granulated white stuff, because that’s my slave fructose. Who knows? I’ll bet she was thinking it was icing sugar the whole time and believes that it’s some kind of red velvet buttercream trailing out of her nose. Those cakes aren’t easy to make, maybe she is formulating a new baking technique. I guess we will see if Miss Lohan shows any talent in the arena of things baked. Hold your breath!

        You can break it down along party lines if you want, but since the only lines of hers that have garnered the attention of the public are the ones sitting on a mirror even the staunchest of supporters has reason for pause.

        Mean Girls is almost ten years old, and to this day people seem willing to stake their lives on that one performance. How is that being harder on her than sending dudes to jail? And, um, what is the Sober Stalwart coughing up? Holy Hemmrorhage, Batman! Oh wait, it’s the black kid’s pleura. Free, at last!

        I sound angrier about this than I actually am, she’s no risk to me, but it does get my hackles up when other lives are being endangered. It’s just the sexism angle that I dispute. It’s too easy.

    • tweety says:

      I think this whole thing is basically a sexist issue.

      • LeeLoo says:

        If it is, it’s because women in Hollywood are everywhere. Every woman wants a chance. If you are a Hollywood producer would you rather use the actress who has a bad attitude, unnatural face, rumors of drug problems who is already going to demand an extra 100,000 to just read the script? Or are you going to go with the eager young fresh face who is willing to work for less just to get their name out there?

        Finding a good leading man is even harder. Most men in Hollywood don’t make it and if you notice all of the young men in Hollywood look alike at this point. How many of them do you honestly think will have a career by the time they hit 40? Only 5 of them at most. Men in Hollywood are weeded out very quickly and many go to the stage. But women are there in abundance and they come cheap. Is it sexist? Probably. But there are more buffet choices in selecting a woman for a role than there are for selecting men.

    • Jill says:

      She’s had far more than her share of “second chances”. She’s on something like her fourteenth chance. Enough is enough.

    • the original bellaluna says:

      I encourage you to read up on RDJ prior to attempting to compare Blohan to him.

      For starters, check out his IMDB page. You should be able to figure it out from there. If not, let me know.

    • ya says:

      completely agree… plus Sean Penn is a notorious domestic abuser yet still gets away with it.

      The double standard in Hollywood – and all the publicity surrounding Hollywood – is horrible.

      • Jo 'Mama' Besser says:

        Look, I’m a black woman, so you’ll never hear me say that there aren’t mountains of discrimination at every level of every society–across the alkali flats, throughout the universe, forever and ever, et cetera–but even when that discrimination is at its most flagrant, no Hollywood starlet can claim to be Jean Valjean, and all of the biographical work done on other evildoers might have been spent on something nobler, perhaps, not decimating your own big break would be a fair start. It’s also just a reality of life for a member of any underclass- don’t give your detractors fodder, not just because of the immediate implications for your own life, but because when a whole group gets judged based on the acts of one person, it’s always because of something bad. What does pointing the finger do when you’re on the chopping block? It gets a good chuckle from from the man doing his job when he cuts that off, first. I’m not endorsing this, but I think that’s what the people who are smarter than me mean when they say to be the change you want to see. Sean Penn has done some awful, awful things to women, but the money doesn’t care about that, and his past crimes don’t negate the fact that she snorted her life away, which is stupid. Deflection is the tactic used by the person who knows that time is pretty much up. Sometimes, you have to tend to your own garden and make sure there aren’t any unsightly traffic cones marring the scenery.

  5. The Truth Fairy says:

    Photoshop, you amaze me!

  6. Angela T says:

    I watched some of it but fell asleep during a commercial break, it was hard to watch her screw up some lines, but there was a skit when she was wearing a dark wig and I thought she looked better with it. Still a crackie, but not as washed out.

  7. bea says:

    SNL is usually so bad that I couldn’t be bothered to watch.

    Those last pics of her (SNL promo shots?) are the best I’ve seen of her in a long time (including her fashion stuff).

    She is pathetic. Addicts always think they can pull the wool over your eyes. When she goes back to rehab and stays OVER 30 days, I might believe in her “sobriety”.

    • sm255 says:

      So, err, are you the all-knowing spokesperson for addicts out there (lmfao)?

      • bea says:

        Troll,

        I have had to deal with an addict in the past so I feel like I have some insight.

        Isn’t there some bridge you need to tend to?

      • sm255 says:

        No, I’m just questioning your broad, sweeping statement about sobriety and addiction at this point. Nice try though, let’s play again! (as though I actually give a f*ck…)

        But OMG you know what a troll is?? What are you, 27? 37? I know it must be your first time so I’ll go a little easy on ya.~

      • DesertRose says:

        She looks like she has drug bloat. She has dead eyes and her timing is off because she is probably on tranqs. People who are sober usually have a light in their eyes, because they recognize they have chosen to live and they now have endless opportunities to better and advance themselves. I’ve seen every angle of addiction, and if you have too, then you know by looking at her that she is not healthy. Give me a break.

      • Kate #2 says:

        Addiction is a disease. Like all diseases, it has recognised symptoms and a recognised treatment path.

        Lohan fits all the symptoms in textbook fashion – including the belief that they are invincible and smarter than anyone else, which is a particular issue with cocaine or crack abuse – but she is flouting all the treatment regimens. You can’t be in recovery and party all the time, especially with the same people you were using with, and in the same environment. That is not recovery at all. It’s continued addiction.

  8. WTF says:

    those promo pictures are sooooo photoshopped wheres the double chin…the chipmunk cheeks, the puffed up lips??

    in the third pic she looks almost human and clean

  9. mew says:

    Uuuh the amount of Photoshop on those pics! I guess their favorite filter must be Diffuse Glow…

  10. Gia says:

    First of all, I have never seen someone’s chin and neck so heavily made-up with ‘shade’. As for her acting, it’s SNL so expectations shouldn’t be that high in the first place, but even with lowered standards she was still awful. They barely gave her any lines and the ones she did have she would stumble over. So overall, exactly what we expected.

  11. Jackson says:

    I thought she would do better, actually. I haven’t watched the whole thing yet but from the reviews I’ve seen it only gets worse. Look, at this point, the only reason people want her on their project is for the ratings she will bring because she gets the press. But can anyone really imagine her as anything other than “Lindsay Lohan” and not a character in a film? I can’t. Her private life is too public for anyone to get lost in a film and have her be believable as a character. Thankfully the SNL hype is over with now and she can just go away.

  12. Jackie says:

    i was kinda rooting for her, but last night was not great. she was barely in any scenes and she didn’t apply herself when they did put her in skits.

    officially, i think it’s over for her.

    also, emma stone has taken the place in hollywood that could have been hers.

  13. dorothy says:

    Honestly, I wan’t interested enough to watch.

  14. k says:

    She was never talented; she was just a cute Disney kid with a momager.

  15. Marjalane says:

    The whole show was kind of disappointing- her monologue was lame. The best parts of the whole show were the opening with “Shep” and his dead mother, (That guy is so bizarre!) and The Real Housewives of Disney! That was hilarious- I hope they make that a regular bit. Everyone was funny in that. I didn’t think Lindsey looked necessarily high, just kind of out of place. The only time she looked halfway pretty was when she was wearing the red wig!

  16. mln76 says:

    Let’s get this straight Lindsay has never been a talent like RDJ she was decent in a couple of Disney movies and Mean Girls. It would have been a stretch for her to win an Oscar or have a big career even w/o the drugs.

    • lw says:

      So true! I hate the comparison. RDJ already was known for being a great actor before his downfall, which is why he kept getting hired. Plus, Lohan has completely destroyed her face and voice, which matters more since she is a woman. What role could she possibly get now that wouldn’t be better played by someone else? She seems to be the only one who doesn’t know that her career is over.

  17. Tuppiv says:

    I’m no Lohan apologist (I’m actually usually rooting for her to fail), but I think she did a pretty good job considering what she had to work with. I was kind of shocked. The skits with her in dark wigs had me going, “aww remember when…?”
    She has never been some great acting talent, though. I never understand it when people say she used to be talented.

    As an aside: Rape jokes, SNL? Really? People need to be giving the writers and producers shit over that, not nitpicking LL’s performance.

  18. hyena says:

    She WAS talented but she’s a shell of her former self. Will she have an RDJ comeback or be a Whitney? We’ll have to see.

    She keeps getting chances because celebs themselves emphasize with her because they are realize they walk a fine line with the path she is on. Hollywood is full of addiction issues, people wanting attention/affection/love. The public can’t understand and therefore we criticize/hate.

    Whoever said emma stone took her place is right and they even made a joke about that last night during the monologue. The Real Housewives of Disney was hilarious! Pre-taped is Lindsay’s friend.

    • HappyJoyJoy says:

      I beg to differ. I believe she keeps getting chances because she sleeps around with anyone who offers her coke or “job opportunities” which never materialize, she just gets to go around telling everyone what she’s going to “be in”
      She was a cute kid that had easy delivery of lines, that however did not translate into her late teens/early 20′s. I doubt she’ll make it past 27. She’ll disappear and be remembered for being infamous, not famous.

    • BNS says:

      Blohan’s name should never be mentioned in a sentence with RDJ or Whitney Houston. She’ll end up like Tara Reid or Courtney Love. Cracked out, but still alive, and still terrorizing Hollywood and harassing producers for jobs.

  19. Lacey says:

    Did anyone see the article in the Daily Mail? Here’s a quote: “tendrils of platinum blonde hair whirling around her strangely puffy face like a lion’s mane”. LOL!

  20. Jo says:

    Didn’t someone report she was going to sing her opening bit? Kenan Thompson, Kristen Wiig, Jimmy Fallon and Jon Hamm all made appearances during the opening, and LL’s part was minimal.
    I was surprised at how little she was used. On the other hand, maybe I shouldn’t be surprised; she just wasn’t that good when she was used.

  21. katie says:

    have this on DVR, cant wait to watch it!! i knew this would be a good thread today

  22. sullivan says:

    It wasn’t an epic fail, just boring. Her reliance on the cue cards was obvious, but maybe I was watching her too closely for signs of crazy. Too bad about the face. She must use Rose McGowan’s plastic surgeon.

  23. teri says:

    I actually tuned in and watched most of it, pretty good. I was watching her UTUBE video with her singing, amazing.

  24. Boo says:

    I watched the whole thing. She was awkward throughout. She messed up lines or delivered them poorly. She kept looking all around as if she had forgotten that when acting, you are supposed to pay attention to the other actors and react to the things they say and do. They clearly minimized her camera time because she was failing miserably.

    Also, she looked horrible–the huge bloated moonface and huge cheeks–plus her voice is so distracting, like nails on a chalkboard.

  25. C&M says:

    I think a movie will to much for her and she will start her heavy drug use again. She should lay low for a year or two.

  26. Rita says:

    Lilo’s “fan base” has done what she has not, which is grown up and moved on. She’s little more than a desperate curiosity now.

  27. meme says:

    lame. i thought that was lara flynn boyle in the buddha skit. this trick is getting film offers because of this crap appearance? jeebus.

  28. cat1 says:

    Good for her for trying – she seems uncomfortable tho’ … some may be the material; some the overall situation.

    One thing — I feel like the blond hair isn’t doing her any favors. I think she’s probably staying that color to distract from something about her face because it ‘whitewashes’ it more but we might be pleasantly surprised that she would look pretty (again) as a redhead.

    That being said, she just seems so nervous and even in her interviews like she’s just not sure how to get centered again. I know sometimes you just don’t know the answers to things you wish you did. She’s just not there yet and I’m not sure what would cause that epiphany. Even being clean might not.

    It would be interesting – but maybe not fair – to compare previous SNL hosting gigs. I appreciate that there are people in the entertainment biz trying to give her a chance but I really don’t know if she’s figured out what she needs to yet …

  29. Jayna says:

    70 percent of the show is bad anymore. Why put the blame on her?

  30. LucyOriginal says:

    I wish John Hamm were the host, ;) .

  31. shoeaddict says:

    Just finished watching the entire show and just a few telling observations: 1. Lohan’s timing was off…not just a little but way off as she delivered her lines. Whether the writing was good or not is debatable depending on your personal tastes. But that has nothing to do with the delivery of her lines. Ironic that Lohan did not do her “lines” 2. Her performance was stiff-not only does her puffed up with filler face remain frozen but her body does as well. She was painfully frozen in her opening and it got worse as the show progressed. 3. As to the complaint that she was pushed into the “background” of most skits and never had a chance to “shine”- that should be telling for the reason she couldn’t command the lead role because she wasn’t up to the task. Some guest hosts are better at being able to do live improv than others. Clearly Lohan isn’t one of them. Deniro couldn’t, but Timberlake could. The difference here is they were “ASKED” to host and Lohan begged for the gig. Is she that so out of touch with her “talent” that she thought she could pull this off? 4. The fact SNL had to throw in some old skits is telling that Lohan was not able to carry her load. For her to attempt live improv as her “comeback” was not a smart move. 5. Lohan needs to put down the filler needle. I realize that her bad habits have wreaked havoc on her face but this bloated plastic face is worse. No one sober would go to this extreme and think that it looks good. Clearly drugs alter your perception of reality because her face is jacked beyond recognition.

    • LAK says:

      re: her face, i’ve given this waaay too much thought but here goes…..

      Drugs, especially meth ruin bodies but especially faces. There is a website called faces of meth that demontrates the deterioration that happens in months rather than years. What if the cosmetic surgery is to fill out and repair her face to counteract the effects of the drugs? The frequency of her boosters may be an indication of how fast her face is deteriorating and therefore needing repair.

      If i am right, then she is not doing herself any favours because she can not see her true face which may shock her into changing her druggie ways especially as her face is her fortune.

    • OriginalTiffany says:

      I posted during the show on her face thread, but I found this to be a Crackextravaganza!

      She was obviously not capable of doing her part and pulling her weight evidenced by how little she was on, how much support she got from other guests and talent on the show. She needed to read every line, black crack eyes darting back and forth all night between cue cards and her co-stars faces.
      Too many repeated scenes from old shows and guest spots doing promos. The show was awful.
      Her body looks awful as well in her dancing skit all she did was dance, act slutty and bratty and she was picking her shorts out of her ass and she was so saggy and bloated.
      She was basically in the background most of the time. The jail skit was painful. She must have pulled a pity card from papa Lorne and he threw her a tiny bone which she choked on.
      Jack White was great and the only redeeming thing on the show.

  32. Marybel says:

    So painful. In a closeup you could see her pupils were huge. In the DJ skit, she was mostly off camera, looked like she was checking out. She read all her lines (the ones she didn’t snort) and still messed them up. Seriously, this should be the last time we see her on the screen.

  33. Shelly says:

    I watched, and to be honest, I was hoping she’d knock it out of the park. Well…..I thought the Disney Housewives was pretty funny, but that’s about it. I also liked the opening monologue. I did notice her looking at cue cards during the jailhouse skit. I didn’t notice her having to look any other time, though, and will say maybe she was just nervous since this was her first gig in years and it was live on top of that. Overall, the skits were lame last night. I don’t really think she had that much to work with, so I won’t blame her for the lameness of that, since she is not the writer of the skits. Her acting seems a little more wooden and less natural than it used to be. I do think she was funny and very much a natural at one point in her life. Maybe she is just rusty. I’m giving her the benefit of the doubt, because for once she didn’t annoy me. I kind of felt bad for her that most of the skits were so lame.

  34. ocean says:

    watching the entire show was painful. I didnt find any of the skits funny. In the jail skit it seemed like she forgot her lines and the other guy just took right over. I think its really time for her to move on. However, she grew up rich and in the limelight and people like this just dont know how to live like normal every day low income people.

  35. samira677 says:

    A Lifetime movie and a movie directed by a music video director is barely lining up roles.

    • LAK says:

      it’s a start.

      Drew Barrymore also re-launched her career via a TV film, i think it was the Amy Fisher Story. She followed that with more dodgy roles, playboy stint etc until she broke through.

      • Boxy Lady says:

        Yes but Drew also understood that she had to work really hard in order to regain the trust of those in power in Hollywood. I saw her do an interview where she said, essentially, that even if she didn’t nail a particular job that at least the word would get out that she was doing good auditions. And then with the jobs that she did get, the word would spread that she was reliable and professional and more work would come her way. This is the path Lindsay SHOULD take, but her and her mother’s narcissism and laziness is preventing that from happening.

  36. TG says:

    Okay so her opening skit was actually quite sad, though it could have been funny, but the problem is it is way too soon to be laughing about her problems since it has not been long enough in the past and we have not seen her own up to any of her mistakes yet so she needs to go away for a year or two and stay out of trouble volunteer somewhere and then we might take her more seriously. And get a red wig STAT. That blond is hideous and what is wrong with her face? It doesn’t move and those duck lips have got to go.

  37. suhon12 says:

    I feel Lindsay did a great job, given the skits she was given. The housewives skit was the best, but she did tend to lose momentum right at the prison skit. I’ve noticed more cue card reading by all the comics on SNL, it is not like it used to be with previous SNL alumni. The writing needs a drastic overhaul, they are stuck featuring the same top comics ie, Kristen Wiig and Andy Samburg, Fred, Keenan, and the one other guy, but they need to mix it up, get new writers, drop the old game show skits. But the cue card reading, I think everybody on SNL reads the cue cards a little too much, look where they are looking! But it would have helped Lindsay to have better skits. So many commercials between skits also!! I went to bed early.

  38. Rachel says:

    I fast forwarded through most of the show. The Shep skit was funny. As was the Weekend Update. Jack White was awesome, as was expected. The Hamm was untainted in my opinion.
    Can’t really comment on her performance, though. Barely saw it~

  39. Dee Cee says:

    Lilo philosophy; Life is all one big work with it and improvise rehearsal.. you can always cut, edit and photo shop duh?

  40. HappyJoyJoy says:

    For someone who likes lines so much she sure flopped most of the written ones. It was painful, unrehearsed, an amateur level performance at best. She has no business in front of a camera any more, she has no business being presented as an actress! I think NBC is gearing themselves up for when she kicks the bucket (so in like a year and a half) they’ll have all this exclusive footage “before she passed” -Dirty moves- I wonder how her ratings came in. I watched on DVR.

    Any who, she sucked. HARD. I’m sure surprising absolutely no one. Reminded me of her comeback #232 stint at the MTV awards when she was with Chelsea Handler… Remember that was supposed to be huge? yeah? this was worse.

  41. WOM says:

    I couldn’t bring myself to watch the show. It felt exploitive on the part of Lorne Michaels and SNL.

  42. G says:

    She’s still got her job at the morgue.

  43. Jenn says:

    I don’t know who called Sean Penn a great actor, he is Overrated. Now as to Lohan being like RDJ yeah I can see it. All of us NOBODY TROLLS (let’s face it) here have f’ed up dozens of times and expect to be forgiven each time so give the girl a damn break!

    • NinaG says:

      First and foremost, I’m not a troll and most of the people who comment on here are not. Second she has had plenty of chances but she continues to snort them. So if the public chooses to denounce her so be it. She’s been on easy street with the law for a long time. I say getting a slap on the wrist is getting a second, third and fourth chance.

    • Kate #2 says:

      “All of us NOBODY TROLLS (let’s face it) here have f’ed up dozens of times and expect to be forgiven each time so give the girl a damn break!”

      Um, okay. Not being in the entertainment industry/famous does not make someone a “nobody troll”. Doctors, lawyers, teachers, social workers, soldiers and other non-famous types actually contribute to society too, believe it or not. Civilians have lives too – in fact possibly, rather often, more genuinely useful and worthwhile ones.

      Secondly I have never f’d up on the Lohan scale. I’ve never seen the inside of a criminal court as a defendant, I’ve never been so much as stopped by police, I’ve never been an addict, I’ve never stolen or assaulted anyone. I’ve never let my co-workers down, or abused anyone. This would not make me a saint – it would make me normal, and your failure to understand that is quite frankly bizarre. Lohan’s behaviour is way, way worse than most people will ever get. Now, does that mean she has no humanity and deserves no pity? No, it doesn’t. but let’s be clear; this is someone who is responsible for her own situation, and is now famous primarily for being an unholy mess.

      If I ever screwed up as badly as she has, I wouldn’t expect to be forgiven. I’d expect to be in rehab, having lost my job, my friends, my husband and my kid. I’d also expect to have served substantial jail time. She has to work on herself to be forgiven. It’s not a free pass every time.

  44. bub says:

    TMZ says SHE thinks she did a great job. Delusional. She was puffy faced, had a double chin, bloated, lips looked like they were going to explode… she should just give up. Why do people say she had such talent? OVERRATED. Never had any.
    She should find a new career.

  45. Jordan says:

    It wasn’t the best SNL, although those are few and far between now. If Charlie Sheen (is he still toothless?) can still get work and no one is up in arms about it, I don’t know why people get so upset when Lindsay tries to work. As long as she is professional, she has a right to work. I think that’s what this was mainly about, showing that she will be on time, sober, and willing to work…I don’t think anyone thought she would get an Emmy for this. I’m no an apologist, if she screws up, then she should pay the price. But, as others have shown in Hollywood, there’s always a chance if you’re willing to take it and be responsible for it.

  46. Hanna says:

    WHY CANT I WATCH THE VIDEOS?

    Lame.

  47. Mack says:

    My thoughts….

    The only time I really noticed her looking at the cue cards was during the Scared Straight sketch. Otherwise, she seemed to know her lines.

    Yes, she was a bit stiff, but let’s not forget that this was the first time in years that she’s had a significant acting job. She was bound to be nervous and somewhat rusty; that shouldn’t have come as a surprise to anyone. Besides, the writing for most of the show was so awful that no actor or actress would have been able to elevate it. Since she did well in the skits that were actually funny (Disney Housewives, the morning radio show, and the last sketch with Wiig) and only stumbled in the ones that weren’t, I’m putting most of the blame for her performance on the writers.

    The wig she wore during her sketch with Wiig further proved how much better she looks as a brunette. Why she insists on having that nasty blonde hair, I don’t know. She looks younger and closer to her age with dark hair. With the aforementioned wig, she actually looked 25, not 40.

    I really loved how happy and appreciative she seemed at the end. It was cute.

    I just want to mention that many of the negative reviews cite the poor writing, not Lindsay’s performance, as the main reason why her appearance fell flat.

    Lastly, I think some of you are way, way, way too hard on her. Yes, she really screwed up and squandered many opportunities, but some of the things that you people say are incredibly harsh, low, and nasty. I truly hope she never finds this site and decides to read about herself, because she would probably be devastated by many of the comments. The girl is trying to better herself and turn her life around. Until we see proof that she’s using again, I’m willing to give her the benefit of the doubt.

    • NinaG says:

      You must be delusional if you say, she knew her lines. Because Stevie Wonder could see she was reading and stumbling over her lines like it was no tomorrow.That’s not being harsh that’s being real. LL is a grown women who gets plenty of chances because of her status so let’s not make her into this victim because that she is not.

    • sm255 says:

      I agree with you all the way here. It’s just that the public have too much of a high expectation for her since it’s her first significant, albeit shaky, performance. And so far, she’s done a bit decent. Like she’s said before, she knows that not a lot of people trust her, but she’s not going to bemoan herself over that sh*t. Can’t please everyone.

      Everyone here just wants to see her fail (or die, no less) so they can ass-pat themselves and appraise each other on how they were oh-so-right about her. That’s all the negative stuff is, really.

      • Boo says:

        Knowing her lines and delivering them without stumbling all over them and looking lost shouldn’t be too high of an expectation with someone who keeps saying she expects to be at the Oscars in five years.

      • Newtsgal says:

        @Boo
        She could be at the Oscars in 5 years,
        they have all kinds of jobs for her… seat filler, coat check, bathroom attendant…..etc.

      • kit says:

        If you call yourself an actress and expect to be at the oscars in 5 years then showing up on time, being sober and knowing your lines is the very least you should do, its the absolute minimum. Why should we expect any less than good from performers? To me, its like the Lana Del Rey thing and all the people apologising for her saying it was nerves etc, it is lame!
        We really need to stop excusing singers and actresses when they don’t perform well. If you have an off performance in a long line of good/great ones, then thats fine. If you’re pretty bad in the one gig you’ve had in years, then may be a new career is in order. Do any of us get paid for lousy work? How many chances does your employer give?
        You can defend her all you like, it will do no good. She really needs to be told the truth by someone about her behaviour and her appearance and may be then some good will come out of it.
        Oh and even at her best, she was nowhere near RDJ or Sean Penn!!!!

      • sm255 says:

        @everybody else who replied to me:

        Ahuh. Yeah and you guys can keep getting your rocks off of insulting someone you don’t even know. Whatever keeps ya guys satisfied at night.

        And who knows? Definitely with hard work, she could clean up and be at her potential. Maybe not Oscar-worthy, but better than she was before.

        And besides, if you think that she’s all washed up and used up, why are you even on here? Thought your decision was definite – or do you take a sick high in seeing people ruin themselves?

      • Boo says:

        Check the name of the site: it’s CELE-BITCHY, Not CELE-Prop Up Has-Been Crackwhore Criminal Actresses Who Have Shown No Remorse or Talent.

      • Newtsgal says:

        Like Boo said it’s cele-bitchy not lets blow smoke up ol’ Lindsay *ss.
        The caption asked what we thought about her appearance, if you want to just praise her then maybe you should checkout TMZ.
        Sorry you feel like your being attacked, I know that was not my intention, I was merely pointing out facts. You were the one that has jumpin’ on folks for their gammar….I’m just sayin!

      • sm255 says:

        @Boo: You know, with all the ass-kissing for Jolie going on here on this site, I would’ve been fooled. Very fooled.

        @Newtsgal: Are you deranged? TMZ is ripping that gal apart!

      • OriginalTiffany says:

        Damn girl, the only huffy bitch I see in here is you!
        You are the one spelling wrong, calling people out, using wrong words. I picture you as a bored 19 year old-apologies to 19 yo’s everywhere.

        Lohan sucked, and you REALLY need to take a chill pill.

  48. jc126 says:

    I saw about 8 minutes towards the end. She was so obviously looking at cue cards the whole time.

    Was she really so talented? I tend to doubt it.

  49. Dawning Red says:

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    When you begin playing World of Whorecraft, you can choose among several races you with to be, although most of them eventually end up with dead skin, hair, eyes, and brains when you play them long enough. You also choose what class you will play: Drug-dealer, Liar, Prostitute, Drunk Driver, or Loser.

    Travel to other continents and fight the monsters there for experience points. Raid their lairs and steal any jewelry and clothing that happens to be there. Develop engineering skills and make vehicles that you can plow into monsters while they push their children in strollers. Or use your alchemy skill to make new and exciting meth variants! Become the first magic-user that needs to read spells from a cue-card, and witness the spectacular results when you can’t read them right! Use your archaeology skills to mine up Sea Jasper from various dealers around town. Sleep with mobs in order to get a clue where the boss is hiding, then sleep with the bosses too!

    Yes it’s hours of fun fighting for crime while avoiding law enforcement, judges, bill collectors, the IRS, dentists, and your own conscience when you play World of Whorecraft. Start playing now and get a FREE companion to join your adventures, your choice of the Duck-billed Lindsaypus or the wafer-thin Ali-gator. Join today!

  50. notsoanonymous says:

    Her face is jacked enough that it distracts you from paying attention to anything else she says/does. I spent most of the skits trying to figure out what exactly is so different about her… until I gave up and realized it was EVERYTHING. She’s not the same person – not looks, not talent (debatable to begin with), not voice – and I agree with the above comment regarding her being too identifiable as herself to be convincing as anyone else in a role.

    Not that she was a fabulous singer, but a great comparison to her movement, looks and performance is to check out her video on youtube for that one-hit wonder song ‘rumors’ (had to look it up!lol) she did about the paparazzi chasing her. She looked amazing in it, focused, sheesh… she looked ALIVE. Add in the irony of the song topic… Pretty sad, honestly.

  51. Maria says:

    I agree with many of the posters above. SNL, about 10-12 years ago..was regularly hilarious with a cast above all I’ve ever seen….EVERY episode was well done! Now , thank goodness for being able to record it…it really is ‘that’ bad. Maybe if I didn’t compare it to the days of Phil Hartman, Chris Farley, David Spade and the like..but, I do…it’s just not very good anymore. and as for Lilo?…she really doesn’t look good..and she is average everything at best.

    • Cathy says:

      Kevin Nealon, Dana Carvey, Mike Myers. They were good. Haven’t watched it since then. But I started watching it with John Belushi, Dan Ackroyd, Gilda Radner, Jane Curtin and the bunch. So of course that just showed my age right there. I just haven’t been able to get into these new people. So I don’t bother any more.

  52. Kate #2 says:

    I think it’s pretty cynical and distasteful of them to use her at all. I mean, let’s face it, she’s now a celebrity drug addict. That’s what she’s known for. It’s not as if they were featuring her for her impressive body of work, not at this stage in the game.

    Car crash. Someone needs to stage an intervention – her being on SNL is more like corporate enabling, really. “Oh, I get work, I’m still relevant, hey I’m on SNL! Problem? What problem?”

  53. NinaG says:

    She did terrible, She read the cue cards barely and was stumbling the whole time. It’s sad. Now Zoe Deschannel did an excellent job and that was her first time. LL out of a 5 she was a 1.2 at best.

  54. Mark says:

    God, get some new writers.
    SNL hasn’t been funny since Molly Shannon, Cheri Oteri and Rachel dratch left!
    The Rude Buddha skit is a great example of ‘dumbed-down’ America. So not funny and just really accurate depiction of the mentality of main stream America.
    so boring.

    Lindsay doesn’t even look like the same person. She should kept the same shape as her old teeth, just veneered them with the same shape, but no, she went cheap and they are chicklets…
    She looks like she went Madonna on her cheeks and now looks like she’s trying to look 25 again.
    Shoulda stayed out of the Hollywood clubs and away from the Paris Hilton’s of the world.
    You can stick a fork in LL and SNL, they are both DONE~!

    • Zooyork says:

      agree mark re lindsay’s teeth, her old, natural tooth shape is what I liked best about her looks. I like natural teetn the best as opposed to veneers, in general. My teeth are getting a bit yellow now, but I don’t care, I like them the way they are. My boyfriend doesn’t have perfect teeth, and I’m more attracted to him because of it.. I love his one tooth on the bottom that is (far) behind the others, I find it cute and interesting. i actually like the fact that on his top teeth, one is less white than the others. It gives him character, and is masculine and sexy to me.

  55. wunder says:

    Her performance on SNL was wooden and weak. . . She prepared ALL WEEK for this?????

  56. wunder says:

    Her so-called TALENT has been greatly exaggerated. If there is any talent there, it’s not for acting.

  57. Smothers says:

    She should not be allowed to play La Liz! Elizabeth Taylor is an icon, the McCracken is simply a con.

  58. Nudgie says:

    I don’t like her or her ‘work’ so I didn’t watch it. Making fun of her is like shooting fish in a barrel (google it, young’uns) so why bother?

    I wish the show had better writing. I can watch almost anyone if it’s funny.

    And it hasn’t been for years.

  59. Bellatrix says:

    So I’m not American. And I don’t even own a telly. And those clips are restricted to US viewers anyhoodle.

    I need to know: WHERE WAS THE HOLY CAN OF RED BULL IN ALL THIS?
    ‘Cause I see our Lady Holy Smokey Blowy walkin’ out that studio clutching a bottle of liquid sunshine. And that ain’t no Red Bull, beyotches! Fo sho.
    So someone enlighten me: SNL did a whole Lohan episode sans Red Bull? Clearly, this explains the failure…

  60. Amanda G says:

    Why do people keep saying that she was a great actress or could have been great? She was in Herbie for Christ sakes! Mean Girls was without a doubt her best movie, but that credit goes to Tina Fey. Nobody looks at the guy who played Aaron Samuels and says, “oh he coulda been a star!” just because he was in Mean Girls. But it doesn’t matter at all anymore because she f-ed up her face with chipmunk cheeks and fish lips.

    • anytime says:

      one possible explanation: people are dumb

    • Kate #2 says:

      I think it’s the gap between where she was – and people genuinely thought she had talent and might really make something of herself – and where she is now. It’s such a huge gulf, and it happened so fast, when she was so young. They just look at the images of this bright, pretty young girl, and then this addled, puffy trainwreck, and they seem two completely different people in such a short time.

      And it’s all been documented minutely in the internet age, in a way that wasn’t possible when older stars screwed up. The paparazzi and Google have made her fall from grace hugely
      visible and on permanent public record – before, minor starlets were relatively invisible. You had to be Princess Diana to get that kind of blanket coverage.

  61. Gilmore says:

    I only cared about Jack white and that’s what I choose to remember from this episode. She just needs to take a break, maybe a year or two and just lay low. Everything about her is so overexposed and it’s become almost tiring to even make fun of her anymore.

  62. alex says:

    She’s addicted to fame too, including bad publicity.

  63. LeeLoo says:

    I just do not see a place for Lindsay in Hollywood anymore. Even with bad writing there have been many actors and actresses who go on SNL and make the material work and be funny. Lindsay was unable to do so. I think Lindsay is under this delusion that if she’s sober she will get work and it just does not work that way. She didn’t have a lot of talent to begin with and she only had one movie that was any good (Mean Girls). Her Disney resume would have worked for her if she continued to work immediately after she finished but she began doing drugs instead. Her resume is pretty stale on that end and has a bunch of b movie flops on the other end of it. There is just no way she can make it work at this point. Her face and voice are too messed up, her actions and responses to her actions prove that any director will still have to worry about her bad attitude. Why hire Lindsay when some unknown face with more street cred, talent and a natural fresh face can do the work for less?

  64. Cleveland Girl says:

    The only skit that was funny was the Bravo Housewife one, and Lindseys performance paled in comparison to the SNL regulars.

    • Onyx XV says:

      You are absolutely right, Cleveland Girl. I just watched the episode, and that Disney Housewives skit was the best one. And her performance did pale in comparison to the SNL actors – they were hilarious. More than anything her ruined face ruined it for me. The double chin, chipmunk cheeks and oversize lips are a collective train wreck you just can’t seem to look away from. Her constant reliance on the cue cards didn’t help, either. If she’s hoping this appearance will bring her more work, she may be disappointed.

  65. skuddles says:

    Is that her actual eye color? Looks like she stole Paris Hilton’s contacts.

    I agree that Lohan was never as talented as everyone once claimed – she certainly showed some real promise as a child, but she was no wunderkind. And now, after years of pummeling her brain with toxic substances, I doubt she has much talent left. She should probably just stick to the slutty photo spreads.

  66. bettyrose says:

    Wow, that comment about how it “should’ve been” Lindsay in the Help is just mean. Yep, that’s the direction her career would have gone, but that ship sailed without her. Sure, rub it in, fine, she probably deserves that, but then why bother having her host?

  67. Charlotte says:

    just watched the real housewives of disney – should be a regular without rapunzel!

  68. Amy says:

    The best part? That in over half of her skits they put her in a red wig. Take a hint Lindsay.

  69. the original bellaluna says:

    I just watched on DVR. A few things stood out:

    * Blohan was so focused on the cue-cards, she was completely unable to look at the person she was supposed to be talking to in the “Scared Straight” skit. She was also in very few of the very few skits (see below).

    * To whomever was wondering about where her freckles had gone, they are obviously still there – check out her chest in her skits. In other publications, they’ve either been made-up or photo-shopped-out.

    * I haven’t watched SNL in a l-o-n-g time, but it seems the ratio of skits to commercials is now 1-2 skits to 7 commercials. (It didn’t used to be that way!)

    * Weekend Update remains the funniest segment on SNL. The “Fox News” bit was a close second.

    *scrolls up to read the comments now*

  70. Zoe says:

    WTF has happened to SNL? The very fact they even invited Lindsey speaks for itself. After a crazy week in politics, women’s reproductive rights, they have nothing? A once controversial comedic show, is now no better than an episode of Jersey Shore.

  71. Ginger says:

    I’m a Buddhist and the skit didn’t really offend me…we do have a sense of humor. The girl playing Karen was the most hilarious and didn’t even say a thing. I found Lohan’s wandering eyes distracting for sure!

  72. boo says:

    I didn’t see SNL, I have clicked on the show a few times in the past, but made no effort to do so with Lohan on. I’m just not that interested in her. I think her time has come and gone. As some of the comments have stated I don’t think it has to do with sobriety anymore. She is not that great of a talent and whatever she did was minor and was in the past. There are many young actresses looking for a chance and they are younger, better looking and probably have more talent that Lilo has. I didn’t think of this before but now I realize that her career is over. All she can do is crappy little movies and some hooking. That’s it.

  73. keira says:

    i thought lindsay lohan was good in a few episodes of ugly betty a while back, but not in SNL.

  74. NerdMomma says:

    I just watched the whole episode online and read all of the comments. I feel compelled to weigh in. First of all, I do watch SNL pretty much every week (online when I am super bored) and the writing has been pretty awful for quite a long time. I’ve also noticed how little they use their hosts, how frequently they replay their commercial parodies, and how often the musical guest ends up being involved more than the host is. So I don’t think that Lohan’s time was limited at all- in fact I think they used her quite a lot. I was really hoping for a win- not because I care that much about her in particular, but because I like good tv. Sadly, she was terrible. She couldn’t deliver her lines. She was visibly reading the cue cards. Her timing was off. Say what you will about the writing, but the writing was no better the last time she hosted and at least she managed to say her lines when it was her turn.

    I was really disappointed in her. I thought she was going to knock it out of the park, but that would have meant putting time into rehearsal, which obviously she did not. As for Jimmy Fallon, she suckered him into doing an appearance when she was on his show. Poor guy.

    Final thought: the monologue was extremely disrespectful to all law-abiding citizens who take following the law seriously. I sound like such a dork right now, but I mean it- making jokes about how she’s skirted her legal issues is just disgusting.

  75. Anna says:

    I thought Lindsey was great in Freaky Friday. She was able to play her own part and then turn into her mom. That is when I thought she would be a marvelous actress.

    Now it is all sad sad sad sad. She was a kid and I blame her family. This kind of fame and power and money can do in the most stable personality much less an egotistical insecure person surrounded by fame whores.

    I hate to say it but I also agree it might be too late, if only because of how she has ruined her looks.

  76. crazycatlady says:

    I’M the one who keeps pointing out here that she CANNOT ACT. She was a decent and cute child actor (not that hard a task), but she’s been mediocre to horrible as an adult.

    She has been FAR more famous for being tabloid fodder than anything else in her life. THAT is not “talent.” And she’d be better off coming to terms with this reality sooner than later. Otherwise, she will continue this cycle of self-destruction/crisis/”comeback” attempt/failure over and over again.

  77. megs says:

    The only thing that has ever bothered me is the media which consistently says how talented she is. Where? When? In what? Herby?? Mean girls? I know who killed me? Freak Friday? Georgia Rule? She doesn’t have any range. She recites words. She can look sad and fake cry poorly and pout her lips and put her finger in her mouth to act like a whore. She IS NOT a good actor.

  78. anytime says:

    she was below average. acted like a teen on a high school theatre stage and was nervous and had wasn’t convincing while speaking her lines, at all.

  79. hillbillygirl45 says:

    Ol’ gal looks like shit still, doesn’t she? I agree with everyone who says she can’t act, and never could. The Cracken needs to go back to school and learn a trade…..I just hope to hell the trade she learns ain’t hairdressing, cause hers looks like bleached broomstraw. She just needs to go away, NOW!!!

  80. echolocate says:

    I had a student one semester with terrible, crushing depression (along with what seemed like a borderline personality disorder). She retook my class after failing the prior semester due to much missed work. Anyway, she was a sharp enough young woman, but she started out the second time around with a goal of making the dean’s list, a goal she reiterated each time I spoke to her. Unfortunately, she did poorly on her first course task. She could still have passed the course, as it was early on and most of her grade wasn’t determined. But, since she had set an overly ambitious goal, she just faded after that and stopped attending (but offered a number of increasingly implausible misfortunes as reasons)

    Anyhow, Lindsay reminds me of her. Baby steps are great and all, but a heavily hyped hosting gig on a longstanding live comedy show where she’d be expected to be flexible, quick on her feet, and prepared was not the answer. Similarly, a role in a film with Oscar-caliber actors might be in reach if she worked very, very hard. Winning an Oscar in five years? Almost certainly impossible.

    I fear she’ll end up like my student, who failed all her classes that semester despite our frantic efforts to get her to do a late medical drop, costing her family thousands of dollars and washing out of college shortly before graduating.

    Her family and remaining fans are killing her by convincing her she’s a much bigger talent who deserves the world stage when she just needs a regular schedule and some real, achievable accomplishments, either as an actor or in another field, and for which she obtains the proper amount of training. Honestly, she liked the morgue. How about a part-time job there and some work voicing a gravelly voiced animated character (or as a radio DJ) with some serious acting classes at night? This addiction to the limelight and the outlandish goals are wrong for someone with her issues.

    • Annie says:

      Great points, echocolate. It is very probable that Lindsay seems to be getting nowhere because her sense of entitlement gives her the expectation that her problems can be solved like *BANG, POOF* overnight. Goals like “Win an Oscar within 5 years” are actually holding her back, because this competitive mindset will prevent her from ever taking a realistic look at herself and her problems. I was rather like your student in college, I too suffered from terrible depression, and kept setting goals for myself like “make the dean’s list” etc and never quite reaching them. I kept starting different courses, hoping THIS would be the one where I would blow everyone out of the water. It took me years to admit that my real problem was I simply had no interest in the course material, I was only interested in the competition of getting top marks to prove a point to everyone, especially my parents. I do feel at the bottom of it Lindsay too has no real love of acting, she is just trying to prove some point or other to the world. What Lindsay really needs to do is get right away from Hollywood for a couple of years, get a part time job that is nothing to do with the entertainment industry to broaden her perspective on life, and go to therapy to work through the ROOT CAUSE of her psych problems and maybe try a spiritual approach also. And then, if she’s still convinced acting is for her even after she’s “found herself” (and I do think it’s possible Lindsay does not even enjoy acting, it’s just the only thing she knows) she then needs to earn her way back with small roles she can manage and work up to meatier roles. However, I doubt she will do that because Lindsay expects there to be a quick fix for everything – look at how she keeps getting quick cosmetic fixes to hide her meth face instead of thinking “gee, maybe this scary looking face in the mirror is a sign that I really need rehab.”

  81. kc says:

    Most people despise this b!tch and want her to go away. She desires nothing. Why does anyone give an iota of a chance. We don’t want her.

  82. Sure she deserves a second, third, fourth, whatever chance. But we, as viewers and consumers, have a right not to feed into the machine.

  83. Jessica says:

    Stick a fork in LL, she’s SO done it’s not even funny.

  84. HH says:

    It was just so painful to see her “try” to move her face…only her eyeballs were moving the entire show…

  85. Sara says:

    I thought the real Housewives of Disney skit was freaking hilarious!! The best skit on SNL in a long time IMO. Lindsay didn’t do that great but she didn’t do horrible either. I thought she was nodding off during that jail skit though. She looked sleepy.

  86. Ravensdaughter says:

    Undergarments-someone needs to get this girl to wear a decent bra.

  87. Ravensdaughter says:

    Ooooooh, wouldn’t it be fun to see all the Romney brothers together like that? Extreme creepiness!
    I’m a Buddhist too, not offended by that skit at all. I think most Western Buddhists, at least, are encouraged to nurture their sense of humor as one of the ways to go with the flow. Also, I think that any religion needs to poke fun at itself to maintain a sense of flexibility to different ideas and points of view. I suspect the Dalai Lama-I don’t presume to speak for him, but I have read so much of his work and I KNOW he has a wonderful sense of humor-would agree.

  88. truthful says:

    my opinion, she was horrible–like she was lost-it was painful.

    the humor did not flow, smdh

  89. Faye says:

    Of those clips, they were all unfunny without LL. She didn’t add or take away from them.

  90. Izzards Chick says:

    Omg! I just want us all to continue bashing her so that MamaCraken and Crackies publicist can keep pretending to be regular commentators on here! Please everyone! If we make a concerted effort we can ALL talk to the Mama of all Crackies! How awesome is that! Please sm255 please keep pretending you’re a regular person! You act better than your daughter/client! Feed that Ho some lines! Ok, not THOSE kind of lines.

  91. Ashley says:

    I have to bring up the point, that as much as we ALL want her to go away, the Lohan posts (I assume) get some of the highest numbers of comments.

    As a result, gossip blogs write about her, news reports on her, we read about her. WE’RE enabling her. As FASCINATED as I am by her, and her seeming total lack of self-awareness, respect for herself and the law, shouldn’t we, you know, be boycotting her?

  92. RdyfrmycloseupmrDvlle says:

    All I have to say is her FREAKY double chin when she smiles is the UGLIEST!!!!!! UGH!!!!!…her looks have flown the coop!

  93. cannonball says:

    I thought she looked very healthy and had the face of a James Bond Girl.