Lindsay Lohan wants us to know that she’s “sworn off dating” right now

Lindsay Lohan

Ugh, I don’t even know with this crackhead. I was actually going to do some research for this post, just because I couldn’t remember – off the top of my head – who Lindsay Lohan last dated in an official way. I’m not talking about “dated” – as in, some random hotel dude who paid Lohan for her services in access and blow. Who was the last dude (or lady) that Lohan dated? There was a rumor about the Cracken and Dennis Hopper’s 21-year-old son, but LL threatened to sue over those stories. And of course, there was the Terry Richardson stuff. What does it say about you if your last “boyfriend” was Terry Richardson? Dear God. Anyway, now that the Cracken is tasting the sweet, powdery goodness of freedom, she’s thinking about her career comeback, of course. And this role as Elizabeth Taylor is just too, too important to LL for her to screw it up by “dating” anyone.

Lindsay Lohan is focused on her career now that she’s off probation and to make sure nothing gets in the way of her upcoming roles, she has sworn off dating for the time being … TMZ has learned.

Sources close to LiLo tell TMZ she wants to avoid any relationships or emotional attachments as she gets ready to shoot her Liz Taylor movie for Lifetime. Our sources say Lindsay wants to devote all her spare time to reading the script and getting Liz’s persona down pat … rather than focus on a new relationship.

We’re told Lindsay has had her fair share of intense relationships (ya think!?!?) and she doesn’t want anything to derail her comeback.

Sorry, boys.

[From TMZ]

Well, you know Samantha Ronson just broke up with her girlfriend. Methinks this is the Cracken’s opening salvo to SamRo, hoping to reel in her ex-girlfriend for one more go-around. That makes me feel sorry for Samantha, honestly. LL has crack-stalked her for years, and while the crack-stalking is really funny (because LL thinks she’s being clever), it’s also really scary. If Lindsay and Samantha weren’t both women, Lindsay’s stalker behavior would be seen as a lot scarier and more threatening. Hopefully, LL is over it. Hopefully, LL is leaving Samantha alone. Hopefully, this report is just about Lohan’s romantic life, and not her career as a cracked-out call girl.

Lindsay Lohan

Lindsay Lohan

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and WENN.

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27 Responses to “Lindsay Lohan wants us to know that she’s “sworn off dating” right now”

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  1. nikzilla37 says:

    Wow, for once she dressed appropriately to court.

  2. HotPockets says:

    If she is following any kind of 12 step program(insert eye roll), it would make sense, because you’re not supposed to date during the first year of recovery/ rehabilitation .

    She probably doesn’t have time to date,while being a full time escort, as well.

  3. RocketMerry says:

    I love how Lindsay’s smug expression has transferred to her lawyer. Is she giving her a makeover, too?! I don’t recall her wearing such bad make up when she began defending Linnocent.

    • Boo says:

      I think both of them have trouble keeping their mouths shut and their teeth under control. Lindsay has to focus to keep her lips draped over those big new chompers, and Shawn has a rollicking underbite that makes her mouth look distorted when she shuts it (or when she opens it, really).

  4. fabgrrl says:

    Hear that, fellas? You don’t even need to bring flowers or take her to dinner. Just drop the money off on your way out.

  5. Rhiley says:

    That outfit is horrible. It looks Casual Corner circa 1989. Ugh…

  6. cbear says:

    I thought she was just a Chateau Marmont hooker now anyway.

  7. atorontogal says:

    why the f*ck is she in the papers on a daily basis? who cares about her?

  8. Nanz01 says:

    Does anyone even care who she dates? Considering she’s the one who tips off TMZ, I think this is probably a plant rather than a story of real interest. LL thinks we care about her “romantic” life (as if it’s not a cover for her escort life). HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

  9. Newtsgal says:

    So the guys sneakin in the back door of Chateau Marmont wearing sunglasses and leaving money on the headboard aren’t dating her…

    Just wondering….has anybody heard if Lifetime has confirmed yet?

  10. Jackie says:

    it’s easy to swear off dating when no one is asking.

    • Alexis says:

      HAHAHA! Word. I doubt anyone eligible men (or women) are knocking at her door.

    • Hautie says:

      My exact thought too… it is easy to swear off men… when none of them want you.

      Then again, it probably is hard to to give up the paying customers now. Since she has gotten use to the cash flow.

      • Peter says:

        It doesnt say sworn off men, it says sworn of dating. Considering this girl hasnt had an actual relationship with a man since she was teenager i dont see how one would automatically assume its only men she is talking about. She seems like she uses men for money and free hotel rooms and stuff, and they use her. I wouldnt be surprised if she is mostly gay though. Her obsession with sam ronson was pretty intense. Going on 27 and no steady boyfriends ever. Even Tara Reid has boyfriends and she a is big trainwreck too. Even the druggie down my street has a boyfriend actually

  11. Newtsgal says:

    Well, some good can come from her not dating…..Pharmacies can finally restock all their STD meds and the Free clinics can scale back their hours.

  12. Asli says:

    Honetly, what sane person would date Lindsay? Emphasis on ”sane”.

  13. hillbillygirl45 says:

    Just WHO in the cornbread hell would WANT to date this nasty hosebag?! Nobody with a halfway decent reputation. So who or what does that leave? Her crack suppliers? OMG, I really don’t like this no-talent narcissist.

  14. Sandy says:

    Lindsay Lohan hasnt dated anyone officially since sam ronson. And it must be a few years since they were in a relationship.

    • Jakes says:

      They haven’t been together for 2-3 years. She still stalked Sam to Venice Beach though. Sam has had at least 2 girlfriends in the last few years. I believe Lilo was living next door to Sam and her girlfriend in Venice for awhile! If Sam has broken up with her girlfriend maybe Lilo regrets moving from Venice Beach recently. Lol!

  15. skuddles says:

    But where does she stand on hookering?? I mean a girl’s gotta eat right??

    Wowza… I’m just a big bowl of bitchface nasty today! ;D

  16. Ruby Red Lips says:

    She doesn’t date anyhow – hooking is much more her thing and he hasn’t vowed to stop that…or the drugs!

  17. the original bellaluna says:

    Cracken, dear, it’s not considered “dating” when one is paid via crack; coke; meth; vodka; lux hotel accommodations; first class airfare; (rarely) cash; or any combination of the aforementioned. (It’s a big word – have someone look it up for you.)

  18. Ruffian9 says:

    I didn’t know $20 for A b**wjob was considered dating.

  19. Katie says:

    I am sure the dating swore her off first. I doubt functional eligible men are lining up at her door right now.

  20. taxi says:

    At least until the antibiotics clear things up.