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Tom Cruise is at it again (that is, grossing me out) in some new Rock of Ages stills from Collider. Sure, I’ll admit to being rather unkind towards Tom as he rocked out in two awful trailers, and things have gotten particularly ugly with the arrival of Tom’s tattooed W mag cover and embarrassing full shoot. To reiterate, I’m not terribly crazy about Tom as a person (it’s a Xenu thing), but I legitimately take great issue with the fact that he’s playing Stacee Jaxx in a very unironic manner, which is not how the character is portrayed in the Broadway show.
Tom himself has even bragged about reinventing the Stacee role as a serious rock star and insisting that his version of the character be accompanied by a monkey called “Hey Man.” In fact, Tom is so bloody serious about this role that he prepared for the role by dancing and singing ten hours per day, and (last summer) he even took advantage of some down time to rock out on a hotel balcony to universal cringes. So am I overreacting a bit to Tom’s overzealous nature in this role? Well just wait until he ruins A Star is Born as well. Here are those aforementioned new Rock of Ages stills. In this one, poor Paul Giamatti is being forced to feel up Tom’s rock star moobs.
In some of the other stills, Alec Baldwin and Russell Brand are camping it up as the proprietors of the club where Stacee Jaxx performs. Clearly, Baldwin and Brand understand the cheese factor involved with this movie. Too bad they couldn’t both teach Tom a few things, but nobody teaches Tom anything. That’s the main problem I see with this film thus far — director Adam Shankman was just so thrilled to have Tom Cruise in his little movie that he neglected to give his lead actor some, you know, direction.
Julianne Hough is digging the hairspray in this movie. Nice attention to detail with the rusty sinks. She’s still not a leading lady though.
Diego Bonita: I still don’t get it.
Catherine Zeta-Jones appears to be truly embracing her role as an anti-rock ‘n’ roll activist. I would hope that she’s merely collecting a paycheck here and didn’t sign on for the “art” factor.
Images courtesy of Collider
Written by Bedhead
Posted in Alec Baldwin, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Delusional, Diego Boneta, Julianne Hough, Russell Brand, Tom Cruise
- Zach Galifianakis is awesome [Buzzfeed]
- Prince at the Billboard Music Awards [D-Listed]
- Bieber’s Billboard look [Go Fug Yourself]
- Married to Medicine recap [Reality Tea]
- Celebrity first marriages [Pajiba]
- The last Mad Men baffled a lot of people [Lainey]
- Karolina Kurkova’s crazy hot dress [Moe Jackson]
- Jennifer Garner on set [Popsugar]
- Kitten vs. Lizard [CDAN]
- Doetzen Kroes’ great butt [Celebslam]
- Shameless star Jeremy Allen White [OMG Blog]
- RIP Ray Manzarek [Bossip]
This movie looks so weird.
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Right? I’ve been ignoring all the coverage of this film mainly because I just don’t get it..
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Historically, across the board, actors playing rock stars always make themselves look ludicrous. Rock stars generally are moody, sullen creatures, very unlike actors, and they always overplay the role. Embarrassing!
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(I need to get my Bestest Beastie Kitty up there with y’alls!)
Oh, and he is just so cringe-worthy. I just hope Kid Rock is appropriately embarrassed by seeing Tom Cruise bite his look, but he’s prob flattered.
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I completely agree..a cartoon might have been better
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Agreed. And not ‘weird-but-might-be- interesting’, just weird. I have zero interest in seeing this trainwreck. Doesn’t even rank as a possible rental.
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My husband and I just shake our heads at this joke of a movie. It can’t possibly make any money…right??
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3rd pic down: the size of them moobs and the stomach gut!
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Does he have any idea how awkward his body is? It is not even unattractive… it’s freaky. As in, I can’t not look because it’s so bizarre looking!
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No, because he is in deep love with himself and everybody around him feeds his ego.
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Dude, put that away.
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Hee hee! ☻
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Ugh, ugh and ugh!
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and double ugh! i think that’s where Katie gets her new ugo wardrobe!
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this movie is either gonna work or bomb…. hmm
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*BOOM!!!*
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I want it to work for Julianne and Russel Brand’s sake, but I am sure not feeling a thing from the glimpses I ‘ve seen.
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Looks like fun! Can’t wait!
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me too!!! I have said it before and I will say it again, I find Cruise bizarrely hot in these pics in a dirty sexy rocker way. So excited to watch!
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Mee tooooo!!!!
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Not me. I like to keep my meals down.
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russell’s hair gave me a huge smile
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How can a good looking man with a pretty good body be so un-sexy and unappealling.
I agree with other reviewers that the pics of him shirtless make my skin crawl!
And this from a girl who in 8th grade dreamed about him making out with me to “Take My Breath Away”…
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Don’t worry Momoftwo…. We all did at some point or another. Personally, he had me at jerry maguire.
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Agree. Can’t put my finger on it, but have no desire to see him or his abs on the big screen. Perhaps it’s the whole Scientology thing?
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Risky Business…
but I got over it — especially after Cocktail. Now, it’s indescribable how gross he is.
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Because no amount of plastic surgery can change a repellent personality. He is unattractive because he is ugly on the inside. No one buys his shit anymore, except him.
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God he is just the absolute worst.
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agreed. the worst. and so gross.
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Check! Stomach is revolting. Co$ affiliation unforgivable. Only a MORON would sign on for that nonsense. A revolting grotesquerie in SOOOOO many ways. Tommygirl….please just lay down and die. Or go to Co$’s afterlife. STAND….DOWN, SIR.
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I’m starting to wonder if he was cast because he can capture the essence of the has-been rocker so well without realising it. He’s going to try to be so serious but look totally ridiculous, just like the real thing. They all end up caricatures of themselves because they can’t let go of their former glory. They just come across as total w@nkers and everyone is in on the joke except them. Just like Tommygirl, right? So you wind him up and let him get right into it, because the more he tries, the sadder and funnier it will be. He’ll probably get praised for his work. We’ll know though.
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Very nice!
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Wow, this is exactly why it will work.
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This. Exactly.
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Good call!
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Weird abs aside, I’d say that based upon the ROA trailers, I think that Cruise’s portrayal of Stacee Jaxx seems very ironic. Hhm.
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Tom Cruise has forever covered himself in the Ick Factor for me. No matter what he does, all I see is Ick.
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I did not want anything to do with this mess at first but the more I see, I gotta admit I really want to watch this.
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I just can’t get over the monkey thing. In an article about Tropic Thunder, I remember him going on about how he told the director his character had to have BIG hands, blah blah.
So now he has a monkey sidekick. .. (I bet this was all Suri’s idea! She should’ve told him to cover his nasty creepy stomach,too.)
Is it too much to hope for that the monkey steals the show?
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I’ll pass.
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I have never seen Tom give a bad performance, so I trust him.
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I was just watching old eps of Dawson’s Creek last night on Instant. I forgot that Katie Holmes was actually a pretty decent actress before she got “roboticized”. And I cannot believe how much Suri is the SPITTING image of Katie. She’s a super-cute kid.
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OMG…Diego Bonita’s hair is what my hair looked like, color and all (when I was natural) when I graduated college back in 1986! Why does a guy in 2012 have my hairstyle?
This movie will bomb big time. Tom Cruise and washed up CO$ butt buddy Travolta’s star power has long since burned out.
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Usually any kind of rock n roll story has me curious, but this one leaves me totally uninterested. Have to agree with momoftwo. Zero sex appeal. Never got the what the hype was about. Reminds me of that guy in high school who thought he was the shiz, but everyone was laughing behind his back, and still are today.
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I might see it when it comes out on DVD…..just for the songs and Russell’s hair. I do love the 80s!
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Not sure about TC in the lead role, but the supporting cast sure looks fun.
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Yeah they do. And like they’re having fun.
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Love, Tom, AND that rock hard body! He is a true talent and a perfectionist who loves his craft. I respect him for that. His movies have always amazed me.
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I think Tommy Girl’s stomach looks strange because those abs aren’t natural. Perhaps they’re ab implants like this guy http://www.thedailycrabbie.com/2011/08/celebrity-big-brother-star-shows-off-ab.html?m=1
from big brother UK.
They both appear to be rocking the ninja turtle look.
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Well.. it’s obvious he isn’t sharing his um, renewed old rocker hawtness with the wifey..
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he looks like Axl rose, i might take it from internet someday :p
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I LOATHE Tom Cruise everyway imaginable and I hate that I am curious about seeing this movie. It has picqued my interest because I absolutely LOVE the 80′s. I don’t honestly know that I’m going to be able to stay away and it is killing me!
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Loathe the man, love the work? Happens to me lots. Some people stink as humans but are freakin talented. So what can ya do? Enjoy the work, ignore the jerk.
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@Happy21…just give in to your curiosity and go see the movie. Sounds like TC can’t possibly repulse you any more, so the worst that can happen is he might repulse you a little less.Looks like a great supporting cast as well. I have liked TC since Top Gun days, so will be interested to see it.
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I bet Chris Hardwick was a ZILLION times better in the stage show. I’d MUCH rather watch that than this shite (which I will totally end up watching on tv one night)
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I think he’s definitely got the irony thing going on….its his serious take on it that makes it so funny. Plus, you cannot deny the man has intense charisma. Regardless of his weird Scientology crap, the man knows how to make fantastic movies, he’s good looking, and people want to see him. Even I do, after going off him for a few years. He redeemed himself with Ghost Protocol. He’s a freaking movie star.
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He may be strange in real life but he is a good actor. I am interested to see him play a whacked out rocker. The Les
Grossman character in Tropic Thunder was over the top and he was actually funny.
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you just love to hate tom – that’s all. i think he looks damn good for his age and i’m looking forward to this movie
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He’s a weirdo, but I would still do the splits on his rod!
…In his defense, he won’t be the one to ruin “A Star is Born” on his own if Beyonce really does come aboard.
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Aubra – You made my day with your refreshingly blunt honesty! (That was awesome!)
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LOL Hey Alexa! I’m new to posting here, I’ve lurked for a long time. But yeah, I had to get that out!
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@Aubra..thanks, that was the best laugh I’ve had in weeks.
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This movie confuses me. Is it satire? Drama? Comedy? What?! I think the whole Tom Cruise factor is screwing it up for me.
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The only reasons to see this movie: Russell Brand and Alec Baldwin. I couldn’t care less about the rest of it.
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Alec looks like an old 50 year old geezer fart in a wig trying to look 30 years younger and it aint working. At least Tom looks young for his age. Don’t get all the Tom hate?
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Frank TJ Mackey meets Les Grossman.
This is gong to be freaking incredible. His Pour Some Sugar On Me version is incredible.
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Tom’s abs are the work of stage makeup (spray tan).
This movie looks like its all kinds of bad. It may draw an audience that likes the campy absurdity of it all, or those going for the curiosity of how bad it could actually be to watch all these stars make asses of themselves. But after the first week, I can’t see it having much of a run. I can’t even watch the promo clips without cringing.
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Didn’t read the comments re this post, but, all I have to say is LMAO!! and LMAO again!!
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No really a fan of Tom Cruise as a person but you can’t deny that he has done some good work in the past and he might actually pull this one of. It’s seems to be an oddly interesting movie.
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The movie seems 10 times of bad, it’s just crap reminds me of High School movie for adults..
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How can someone who was so appealing in Risky Business turn into such a repellent creature?
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Will possibly have the vibe of a male version of Showgirls — in terms of being a cheesy cult classic (eventually), not so much body parts on display.
Everyone involved should start making space on their shelves for their Razzie award.
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Considering this is what he looked like at the time of shooting
http://www.celebitchy.com/169060/tom_cruise_rocks_out_on_a_balcony_to_universal_cringes/
I’d say this movie will be 100% cgi when it comes to his torso.
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When this flick hits the Wal-Mart bargain bins, it’ll start the drinking game of the century. Maybe one shot per “ab” flex? Bare chest scene? Or a double for each time you catch a cast mate rolling their eyes behind his back? And surely he’s got some ridiculous catch phrase he randomly delivers like, “I’m Stacee Jaxx!!”
Then perhaps it’ll be $4.99 well spent.
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This movie looks beyond bizarre and I think I’ll be drawn to it like a car wreck you just can’t look away. I kind of love that Tom Cruise is doing this so serious. I think it’s gonna work better that way because it will still end up being ironic and hilarious because he himself is obviously to that factor.
I’m just hoping it’s gonna be another Tropic Thunder moment with his singing and dancing. Aka. Awesome.
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Anya Garnis is in it, so I’m gonna watch it. Even if I lose 20 IQ points for it.
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My son who is special needs wanted his money back and said , “and they call me weird?”
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