'12
These are photos of Lindsay Lohan leaving (guess!) the Chateau Marmont on Saturday night. Pacific Coast News described the photos this way: “Actress Lindsay Lohan looking a little worse for wear after an evening of partying was seen getting into the driving seat of her Porsche while smoking a cigarette at the Chateau Marmont in Hollywood.” Um, “a little worse for wear”? Masters of understatement. Once again, I think we just have to get used to the fact that THIS is her face now. I would like to know just how crackie you have to be before you start applying your makeup to look like this – like a deranged, out-of-control whore-clown. She’s like something out of Stephen King’s nightmares. Oh, and FOR THE LOVE OF GOD she needs to stop getting behind the wheel. Jesus, literally (!) take the wheel.
Meanwhile, LL decided to pitch a film remake to her Twitter followers after what I can only assume was a mountain of blow. Lindsay’s idea: to remake Thelma & Louise with Jennifer Lawrence! But crackie thinks the remake would be better “ala Natural Born Killers (style wise) 2 girls-2 guys.”
[Via Lindsay’s Twitter]
Crackie Von Cracks-A-Lot basically wants to make a p0rno with Jennifer Lawrence in which they take a roadtrip and take turns boning each other’s boyfriends. And if I was advising Jennifer Lawrence, I would just tell her to ignore it completely. Don’t even bother to respond negatively, because Lindsay will just latch on to it. Just don’t even engage.
I guess Lindsay is feeling special these days because she’s been “working” so much. So far this year she’s had a cracked-out appearance on Glee, she barely managed to get through a month-long shoot for Lifetime’s Liz & Dick, and she’s been filming The Canyons with p0rn star James Deen. Someone posted this photo of Deen and Lohan “in bed” together during a scene. Even in a blurry camera-phone shot, her face still looks so incredibly jacked.
Photos courtesy of Pacific Coast News.
Written by Kaiser
Posted in Lindsay Lohan
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Hide your kids, hide your wives!
Cracken on the loose, damn am I glad im not driving out late in Hollywood.
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OTiff, cracking up at your avatar pic. Pun intended.
JLaw is too classy to work with The Cracken, and too sensible. Jeebuz, it is WAY too early for cracktinis. I need at least another hour before I start mixing the drinks.
Hmmm, I wonder what’s in her cup in the photo? “Water,” I’m sure.
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Mix away, it is Monday morning!
Seriously I followed that van a block to get that shot. It is a company that eradicates cracks, maybe they do Crackens as well, shall I call? I had to have the pic just for my gravatar.
Monday’s are our Saturday’s, so bring on the tinis!
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It’s never to early for a cracktini my friend. Belly up to the bar.
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OK, this week is officially off to a much better start than last week, at least for me professionally. No crazies this Monday – only Crackens, and thankfully I don’t live in L.A., so I’m safe on the streets.
Pass me a Cracktini, please…
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Please add me to the cracktini guzzling list.
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I just can’t get past the pictures to care about the story. Girlfriend is not looking good. What the f is going on with her eyebrows?
On the other hand, my elderly mother will be pleased to know that her hideous shade of coral lipstick has a new fan.
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It is an awful colour. Yuck
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it can actually look great on darker skin tones
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Eyebrows? I couldn’t even get past the drawn on clown lips that clearly don’t even match her very inflated lip lines!
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It looks like she’s still wearing the last makeup application done for the L&D movie.
Did they just tattoo it on her face to save time?
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It’s not much the lipstick as, say, her LIPS.
Dear God, what is she doing the herself…?!
I mean, is she actually injecting CRACK directly in her lips now?
Is that a new thing, to get the stuff into cirlutation?
Does that give some sort of slow release, so that every times she opens her mouth a little bit of crack enters the blood flow?
Is that why she her mouth is ALWAYS open? Uuuuuh, I’ll bet you it is! That explains so much.
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“Whatever happened to Baby Jane” I think we found her. Lol
They really do resemble each other.
http://mycatmabel.blogspot.com/2011/12/whatever-happened-to-baby-jane.html
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Have mercy – she looks 60!
The drawn cupid’s-bow lip shape is fail, honey. Just don’t. It looks like those wax lips you get at Halloween.
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Yes they do do look like those Halloween lips. I didn’t think she could look any worse & then she proves me wrong.
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Gee…speak of the cracken devil…just mentioned her on the Tara Reid post. Those two are peas in the same cracked out pod.
She should make Thelma & Louise with Tara.
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Yes, a remake of Thelma & Louise starring Crackie and Tara Reid…..THAT’S believable.
@brin, you’ve definitely managed to pigeon-hole exactly where Crackie belongs in the acting hierarchy….at the bottom alongside Tara Reid.
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brin – Hi! It could be a “reality documentary,” where cameras follow them around on their drunken/crackie adventures; and when they get into legal trouble (they’d have to kill someone or smoke weed, since it’s filming in LA County – you know how THEY are about “stars”) they go on the run!
BEAUTIFUL.
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I don’t know why nobody’s signed her up for one of those terrible reality shows. Even Honey Boo-Boo Chile has a white trash reality show.
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gg – Maybe Honey BooBoo Chile is more reliable and better behaved?
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I haven’t seen The Soup in far too long, I forgot that existed. Looks like I have to back-viewing to do (of The Soup, not Boo-Boo).
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The whole Honey BooBoo family makes me want to run and hide. After screaming.
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I feel sorry for her, It’s just pathetic and sad now.
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It really is very sad. All the potential that she had, smh.
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Sofia: “… and sad now”. NOW? Have you been in a coma for 3 years?
Just kidding with you. She just stop sinking lower and lower. STILL sas and pathetic!
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Her face looks like it’s melting, I bet she smells bad too..
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YES! “Is her face melting off the bone?” was my first question.
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Mine was…’the left side of her face is melting up. Can things melt up?’ Her face is defying the laws of physics!
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In these pics she looks like Lara Flynn Boyle did just as her face been to morph into the crazy, sad thing it is today. Seriously Lohan is one injection away from a complete facial meltdown.
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It’s the eyebrows. Either she’s shaved them off and redrawn them, or she’s just stuck on “suspicious”.
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Whenever I see a picture of her I think the same thing, “She looks like she smells.”
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and that nose… sheesh
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I KNOW! What in all that is holy is going on with her nose??? It looks like it went on a diet – why is it so skinny???
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When you snort coke all day and night for years..well, I think that’s what your nose will look like. ugh
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CG – Her nasal cartilage has been eaten up by the stuff she snorts, resulting in the collapse of her nose.
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More like Thelma and Puh-leeze.
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Hee hee! “Thelma and Puh-leeze and Two Guys”
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LOL!
+1
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And I’m Brad Pitt
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When she applied that ridiculous make up she must have thought it was a brilliant idea to give herself a manicure also. That silver polish looks like it was applied by a toddler.
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Re: Thelma & Louise remake, although she’s delusional about the costar she should have, the movie genre (crack p0rn) is correct.
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What’s sad is this is the best she’s look in a long time. I don’t think she’s really serious about remaking Thelma and Louise. At least I’m praying she’s just joking. Why on Earth does she think Jennifer Lawrence would want to work with her.
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I truly believe she wants to ruin every happy memory of deceased divas and iconic movies. now if she could make the Titanic remake as well i think this time Rose should die and Jack should live.
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LOOL right on that
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I feel bad for Jennifer Lawrence.. every hot mess is trying to jump on her bandwagon. First John Mayer, now Linnocent.
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she looks like the joker.
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That’s an insult to the joker he looks much better then crackle on a good day.
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It would be more “a la Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas,” but that’d be too obvious…
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Not HST too. First Marilyn Monroe & Elizabeth Taylor, now Dr. Thompson, too. He was not a crackie. He was a controlled substance enthusiast.
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I could believe her in a remake of “2 girls 1 cup”.
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aaaahahahahaha!
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Those sunken eyes look sore. They make me want to go take a nap for her.
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*1 billion opportunities of Susan Sarandon jokes*
*1 billion tears of dissapointment, no chance in hell SamRo can play Tim Robbins*
*f-ck than make this baseball movie remake*
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Yeah, that’ll happen. Right after Snookie and Helen Mirren do a buddy cop movie.
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^1+: Giggling into my coffee, girl. That’s funny.
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That’s hysterical!
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Thanks for the chuckle
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Every time I read about “The Canyons” I read it as “The Crayons” — which, frankly, sounds like a fantastic movie about killer crayons come to life.
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I do the same thing, everytime!!
Crayons… I like your idea about the killer crayons though, lol!
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I would check that out. Do they still make those giant toddler crayons – the hard ones that look like cigars?
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OMG! Who did her makeup? Just awful! Looks like a clown.
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you get one guess.
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Who keeps giving her porches???
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Carpentry aisle of Home Depot?
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LOL
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Very funny, I’m sure you’ve never made a typo in your life. Jeez spelling nazi dead ahead.
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*snort* Hee hee! That was pretty funny!
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2 points. ++
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What fascinates me at this point is how she still manages to wear falsies. I can’t imagine she’s smart or motorically stable enough to apply them properly, so how on earth did they get on her eyes? Maybe as a beauty blogger I’m overthinking this
And yes, she needs to stop driving, stat. But as you’ve said so often here on CB, they won’t even consider taking her license away until she actually kills someone. Sadly, I believe that’s very real possibility.
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I read on the Daily Mail the other day that she had to agree to a whole bunch of conditions to get that part in the canyons. They originally wanted to give her part to someone else (who didn’t want it and didn’t even bother to show up for the screen test)and only give the cracken a cameo in it. The cracken had to screentest, finish Liz and Dick on time, and take a salary cut, agree to appear nude and so on and so forth. BWAHAHAHAHAHA…do they realize what they’ve gotten themselves into. Cracktini time.
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Even with all the conditions was it worth it Lindsay is not going to bring anything to the movie. A no name crack whore off the street would do more for this movie then Lindays ever could.
I mean really what do they hope to gain from it.
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Did someone tell her that she looks good in exaggerated Lizpatra eye-makeup, possibly as a prank, and Lohan bought it?
I think she’s easily susceptible.
After playing Liz, she’s now all Liz-like. (eye-make up, twitter profile pic).
Now, as she’s starring in The Pornyons, everything is 2-girls-2-guys, that’s all she can see. Give her any kind of movie script and that’s all she can see, I bet.
Also, seems like this J-Law thing is her way to insinuate herself in any convo possible. can’t wait to see which rising star or boxoffice film LL’s going to hijack to shift light to herself.
gurl, pleaseeeee.
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I don’t even have anymore words to describe her face.
Really a 50years old cracked and botoxed trans-hooker. Her skin is freaky, seriously she need a good mirror.
Can’t even look at her lips anymore. ugh.
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i must say i’ve grown immune to her facial conditions, but that close up picture of her hands/fingers in
http://www.pinkisthenewblog.com/2012/07/lindsay-lohan-begins-work-on-her-new-film-the-canyons/
gives me some serious creeps.
the low quality of the image not helping either.
*shudders*
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oh my god………totally gave me the creeps.
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I was just gonna ask what is up w/ those fingers and nails..looks like an old habit never went away…. Think she is beyond turning back at this point she is too in denial.
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Forget the nails — she has four scribbly tatts on her hands? … that’s nice … ::side-eye::
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On the positive side of things Lindsay would do great driving a car over a cliff. Maybe that is why she likes the idea of doing a thelma and louise remake. As for her face whatever she has done it will only get worse. It’s sad what she has done to herself. But that doesn’t really excuse her for that awful lipstick and crappy makeup in general.
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If the investigation into her last accident is ongoing by police, and if all evidence is pointing to her being at fault and (in the least) lying to the police, then shouldn’t her license be suspended – especially given her record?
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you’d think-but she is Lindsay *heavy sigh*
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And it is LA County. *heavier sigh*
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I think Miz Lowhan has taken this new style of face painting up for a reason. It’s so we can tell the difference between her and her twin “Octo Mom”. Birds of a feather those two are. Octo Mom will do anything to support her kids, so she says. And the Cracken will do anything to support her habits. Twins they are. Hey maybe Lindsay can star in the Octo Mom Story. Just sayin.
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Or she could make a movie about twins and co-star with Phoebe Price.
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Isn’t wearing makeup like that a sign that someone is in some sort of mental crisis? Like a manic episode where she cannot see any bits of reality clearly and everything must be larger than life to match how great she feels about herself? Do we think she is bi-polar?
Another theory is that she feels she is overdue for the lip injectables and so is wearing her lip color outside the lines to fool us into thinking her lips are as big as she wants them to be. How’s that working?
Or, of course, both could be true at the same time. In any event, when she shows up “on set,” do they take her into the bathroom and hose her down before they let her around the other actors? Can you imagine trying to shoot THAT and sell it as sexy fun? And you KNOW she is butting in, telling everyone how it should be done because she is such a pro! In between puffs of her cigarette and slugs from her “water” bottle, I’ll just bet she is schooling everyone.
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everything you said- too funny. The images of the hose down LOL!
but what’s not funny is the manic makeup & manicure:/ she along with the rest of us has to see these pictures and realize the horror of it all!?! no…ok
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nice nail ppolish
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She looks exactly like Endora…Samantha’s mother on Bewitched. AND Endora was a grandmother of two, a witch and a bitch!
As my mother used to say: “All her taste is in her mouth”. And what an ugly mouth it is!
Actually, her whole face is hideous.
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She’s starting to look how Winehouse did before she passed away.
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Ooohhh, I thought she wanted to make a movie with Jude Law. Granted, this sounds just as hilarious and stupid.
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i have to remind myself that JLaw is Jennifer Lawrance rather than Jude Law.
That is all.
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Good Grief! How long before she starts applying lipstick all over her face? Sad, sad story just waiting to happen here…
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I misread the tweet because of the way it wrapped:
2 girls – 2
cups
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Kinda funny that HE is the porn star but yet she is the one that seems oh so dirty
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Crackie needs to leave that movie the hell alone!! I love that movie, and the last thing the world needs is a remake starring her drug-addled self.
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Agreed! Lohan would totally taint the memory of the original. I would never be able to bring myself to watch it, that’s for damn sure…
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I think Lohan should hold out for a part where the character loses her sh*t on drugs and booze, repeatedly crashes cars, lies to everyone all the time, gets arrested umpteen times, has a batshit crazy family, destroys her looks and health, prostitutes herself to rich pigs, etc etc etc. Your basic nutso nightmare. Oh wait… she’s already living that role. Never mind
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I think the Cracken knows her career as a legitimate actor is over. She’s just putting on a front.
Other than porn, the only thing that face is good for are marginal roles like “drug-addicted sister-in-law”, crack hustler and “patient on gurney.”
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Now Bess, you forgot “corpse”!
SVU, here she comes.
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Oh, gurl, JenLaw don’t care.
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why would anyone want to work with her?? she is trainwreck.
On a side note, why doesn’t Jennifer go to teen awards?? she needs to show a little appreciation for the fans, she didn’t go to mtv, and now the TCA’S, does she think she is too good to go to them?
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Please tell me no one would let Lohan near a classic movie like “Thelma and Louise”. It doesn’t need to be redone at all, much less by a crackhead.
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Urm…stares at her face. O_o
Ooh chile is this what you’ve come to? I have no words.
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Lilo is such a fucking mess. It’s hard to believe she is only 26. It’s sad and frustrating that she tossed away a great life, her health, and her looks on hard drugs.
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Stop with the “looks 50ish” thing already! I’m 53 and look MUCH younger than my age. Most of us do!
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I agree with u. My 51 yr old mother looks better than this girl. To compare her 2 a 45 to 50 something is offensive 2 every1 in that age bracket.
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Correct – we all look fresher than this. I say she looks in her 60s.
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THANK YOU very much Judi!
where I myself just turned 40, I have been having a near hissy fit when it comes to lilo and 40! Do I need to send jpg proof?
I pointed out, I’ll do it AGAIN- Lilo does NOT look like shes 40,50,60,70,or 90 even 104 yrs!
she looks like Hell- and that’s due to years of heavy chain smoking, drinking, coke (and I’d guess some other stuff), late nights, hungover days…
It’s not ‘she looks like….” (fill in the blanks) SHE LOOKS like an mentally/emotionally/physicaly/toxic-ly damaged drug, alcohol, nicotine, prescription drugs self centered, self AND DRUG fulfilling terribly LOST WOMAN!
there…end of the ageism.
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YAY, Erika! And the others on this thread! She looks like shit for ANY age. And women who hit 40 or 50 or 60 do NOT look like this, ever! The exception would be the ladies who have similar problems that have nothing to do with age. My grandmother, an alcoholic herself, used to dye her hair jet black (she was in her 70s at the time), powder her face bone white, and smear red lipstick on to complete the look. We didn’t say, “Boy, she looks old!” We said, “Boy, she looks crazy!”
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Ugh. So depressing. One thing the total trainwrecks featured on this site have in common, is their families care more about pimping them out, and living off their money, than about their child’s mental health. At this point, Lindsay reminds me of Anna Nicole Smith in the videos that came out after her death. It’s not a pretty sight. And her family just doesn’t seem to care.
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+1
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why do her hands/fingers always look so dirty and discolored.
ugh.. gawd, what she must smell like.
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WHAT IDIOT KEEPS ALLOWING HER TO DRIVE PORSCHES?!?!?!?!?!? What happened to the agreement amongst auto dealers/rentals that she could ONLY DRIVE Yogos or Festivas?
As for her future movie aspirations, she’s reached them. Expect to see her next as Jane Doe #2 or 3 on SVU (IF she’s lucky) or in some SyFy movie.
Other than porn, that’s all that’s left.
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Ah but no doubt Porsche has a crew of crash inspectors on standby, waiting for that call.
Lohan may have a promising new career ahead of her… as Porsche’s next crash test dummy
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Stay away J-Law!
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Her lips are going to burst !!!!!!!!
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She was such a cute little girl.
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Yes but, like kittens and puppies, cute little kids grow up into full-sized vodka (water!)-swigging, substance-snorting, pill-popping, dysfunctional adults.
No, my cats and dogs have not been vodka-swilling, substance-snorting, pill-popping, dysfunctional pets.
Generally speaking.
To my knowledge.
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I’d watch that. I’d get crazy drunk first and laugh and laugh and laugh…
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no, she’s not going to do a remake of Thelma n’ Louise…NO!
That movie is an anthem for women’s liberation! That was MY movie in college! It made me feel so mega! I chopped my hair off, dumped the cheating boyfriend!
NO NO NO! Lilo is not women’s liberation…she don’t burn bra’s she burns up the CRACK PIPE!!!
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“Lindsay would very much like it if you’d bid on this item as a gift.”
She’s a hustler. This time she’s hustling for a big-impact role instead of a $20,000 bracelet.
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its NOT thelma & louise style if you add two dudes blek—- the cracken needs to watch FREEWAY 2:confessions of a trickbaby
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