Oprah Winfrey on not being a mother: ‘If I had kids, my kids would hate me’

Oprah Winfrey

Oprah Winfrey covers the latest issue of Hollywood Reporter to promote her role in The Butler. I’m wayyy behind on my Oscar viewing this season, but if the SAG nominations are any indication (and they usually are), then Oprah will likely get an Oscar nod this year. Will she win? Who knows. She’ll probably be up against Jennifer Lawrence, who is an academy darling if there ever was one. Plus Julia Roberts, who can’t be counted out as a mere nominee by any stretch.

The photoshoot here is standard, and I’m so used to seeing Oprah photoshopped on the cover of her own magazine that I don’t even know what she really looks like. This interview is pretty good though. Oprah says there will never be another Oprah, which is absolutely true (sorry, Dina Lohan). The more interesting part is how Oprah explains why she never had kids. It sucks that childless female celebrities always get asked these sorts of questions, but the O handles her response well:

Ending “The Oprah Winfrey Show”: “The only thing I ever questioned about leaving [the show] was the timing. Should I have waited and then started OWN separately? Should I have tried to start it earlier? But the actual ending of the show, I never wanted to be in the position of ever having people say, ‘You shoulda come out of the rain.’”

She’s generous: “When you’re the most successful person in your family, in your neighborhood and in your town, everybody thinks you’re the First National Bank and you have to figure out for yourself where those boundaries are. I got to the point where nobody ever asked me for anything less than $5,000. I felt pressured for a long time to say yes, because I thought, ‘I can’t lie and say I don’t have it. My salary is printed in the paper. I’ve bought more houses and cars than I can even tell you.”

She wants to do Broadway: “It’s something I would like to do, but I’d like to get settled in my house, have a life and then make the next move. I’d just like to be in the space where I really feel like I have nothing to prove. I think I’m just about there.”

On her successor: “There won’t be a ‘next Oprah.’ Just like there won’t be another Barbara Walters, Aretha Franklin or Whitney Houston. People who make their mark in the way that they made it, that’s it.”

Why she isn’t a mother: “If I had kids, my kids would hate me. They would have ended up on the equivalent of the Oprah show talking about me; because something [in my life] would have had to suffer and it would’ve probably been them.”

Her BFF Gayle King always wanted kids: “Gayle [now a mother of two] was the kind of kid who, in seventh grade home ec class, was writing down her name and the names of her children. While she was having those kind of daydreams, I was having daydreams about how I could be Martin Luther King.”

[From Hollywood Reporter]

That last part about Gayle could be considered some slight shade, right? I don’t think Oprah meant it that way at all. They’re the best of friends and appreciate each other’s differences. I totally get what Oprah is saying about how she simply didn’t have room in her life to be a mother. I feel that way sometimes too, and I am a mother. Kids take up so much damn time (and some days are tougher than others). I’d never (EVER) wish my daughter away, but she is a little vacuum of resources.

Oprah Winfrey

Photos courtesy of Hollywood Reporter

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141 Responses to “Oprah Winfrey on not being a mother: ‘If I had kids, my kids would hate me’”

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  1. Speaking the Truth says:

    wow… thanks God i never was considered by my mom a vacuum of resources and even if I was, I am glad she never made such a comment. Some people should never become a mom.

  2. BeckyR says:

    Okrah is so blown up with self-importance. WIsh she would just go away and take Gayle with her.

  3. MrsB says:

    I also appreciate that in her child-bearing years, she never really pretended that she wanted children( if I remember correctly). If only Jennifer Aniston could do the same.

    • themummy says:

      Aniston doesn’t owe you anything. Or owe anyone anything. Maybe she once wanted kids and now doesn’t. Maybe she thought she did, but has always been conflicted. Whatever the case, assuming it is pretending is just stupid and rude, AND the weird self-righteousness people get about female celebs intentions toward their uteri is creepily weird.

      I’ve said FOR years that when my kids turned 15 or 16 (they’re 18 now) I wanted to adopt another baby and FULLY intended to do so, even as recently as a year or two ago. For over 15 years I said this without ever wavering. To me, it was a concrete plan. Then I started to waffle over the idea, as my kids got older and I saw the possibility of an adult life without kids (I started when I was 18, so I’ve never had that). Now, after 18 years of thinking AND TELLING EVERYONE that I planned to have or adopt another baby I have changed my mind. I guess that means I was pretending, huh? The whole time. I’m just a damned liar! I guess I owe people a baby since I said I wanted one for so long. How dare I change my mind! HOW DARE I???! Especially after telling people about it! Especially when I’ve told people my thoughts at the time on it when they ASKED me. I’m a rotten female.

      DUMB. Look, her uterus is her business NO MATTER WHAT SHE SAYS TO ANYONE OF WANTING A BABY OR NOT WANTING A BABY. Why do people get emotionally bent out of shape over whether she has a baby or not? If it were any other random person no one would give a shit. And before you say that she always says she wants kids, etc., actually the truth is that she is always ASKED when/if she’ll have kids and she gives the answer that is real for her at the time. They ask! She doesn’t bring it up. And even if she did, so what?? Why does anyone care what she does with her uterus? Why is that even remotely interesting anyway?

      That said, I appreciate when women know they don’t want kids and don’t buckle to pressure to do so. It’s not for everyone and that’s fine. Good on her.

      Ultimately a woman should do as she feels is best for her. It’s personal. We don’t run around judging the people in our everyday lives for their views on having kids, so why the deep emotional attachment to anger over Aniston’s uterine choices? It’s weird, if you ask me.

      • themummy says:

        Good lord. My comment is so stupidly long. I actually don’t care that much. I just get irritated with the cognitive dissonance that goes on with Aniston and her uterus.

      • Jayna says:

        Yeah, I had a friend who wanted babies so much. She adored children, watching her friends’ children for them all the time. Marriage didn’t happen for her in her thirites, a broken engagement, and she wasn’t financially solvent enough to adopt on her own. Then she gets married in her early forties, and he would have to get his vascectomy reversed but had older kids grown. And she’s like 44 by that point, and she said she really couldn’t see it at 44. That strong desire had really changed by her early to mid forties and she said she never felt she would ever feel that way, not wanting a child anymore, but that it was so different from what she felt even in her late thirites. It shocked me too because she loved children so much. Maybe if her husband had really wanted a child it would have been different, but he had done that and was at a different point in his life.

      • TheOriginalKitten says:

        @themummy-I appreciate your comment tremendously, regardless of how long it was (you’re talking to the Queen of Long Comments ;) ). It’s a point that needs to be made over and over again, apparently, because people are too dense or insensitive to understand it.
        It’s PERSONAL, period, end of story,

      • MrsB says:

        Well. @mummy I think you’re projecting a little, I certainly never came close to calling Aniston or anybody else a rotten female and I never would. I don’t know where I gave you the idea that I am emotionally bent out of shape over the state of her womb.
        Obviously, I didn’t make my point clear. In MY opinion, Aniston and her reps push the “I want a baby” narrative and plant stories about her being pregnant in magazines. Those stories don’t just come from nowhere. Her rep is well known for planting stories. I believe that Aniston thinks her fan base will think less of her if she doesn’t want a baby. My only point was I wish she realized that people would like her just the same whether she wanted to get pregnant or not.
        Obviously, I don’t know any of this for fact, it’s just an opinion from what I’ve observed since we are on a celebrity blog and we make all sorts of assumptions and form opinions on celebrities all day without actually knowing what is going on in their head, right?

      • Maggie says:

        Great comment! I’ve wanted to say this for a long time but you have said it much better than I could have.

      • TheOriginalKitten says:

        @MrsB-Just to clarify, I understood what you meant by the comment, but I do think themummy was right that the media and others act like women’s wombs are everybody’s business, what with “bump watch” etc etc.
        But Aniston HAS made the baby thing a focus and used it for PR-I just wonder if they started asking her first and she brought it up you know?

      • Becky1 says:

        @themummy-thank you! Great comment and I agree 100%. I’m also someone who has changed her mind on the kid issue (along with many other things) so I can personally relate.

    • Erandyn says:

      @MrsB – I totally agree. Instead of replying with something simple and brief, like yes, no or that she’s thinking about it or whatever, JA has always gushed about how much she loooooves children and how *of course* she wants them (what nice, normal woman doesn’t!), which gives me the impression that she’s trying really, really hard to avoid being seen as “abnormal”, like those childless freaks who (gasp) don’t want children. It would be like an action hero admitting to not liking power tools or sports! ;o)

      As a celebrity with a fan base to maintain, I guess you can’t blame her. If my experience is anything to go by, *lots* of people really do feel that way about CF women, and she’d lose a whole bunch of fans if she dared to appear less than completely (and vocally) enthusiastic about the idea.

      Still bugs me though. She’s perpetuating a stupid stereotype.

  4. Post It's says:

    As a CF woman, I get what Oprah is saying. All my friends have always wanted kids, had their names picked out, looked at baby clothes before they were even pregnant, ect. Where I have never, ever had any of those thoughts pop into my head at all.

    • TheOriginalKitten says:

      Yeah me too. So far, anyway.

      It still grates on me that arguably the most successful media mogul of all time, a woman worth $2.9B STILL gets asked the “kid question”. I can’t help but wonder if they’d ask the same question of a man who had her level of success and wealth.

      • Kiddo says:

        I completely agree with your stance on the kids question. Outside of that, I still find Oprah insufferable.

      • lana86 says:

        actually, why not? I think it’s an interesting question to ask anybody, especially people after certain age, those who probably made up their minds on the matter by now. It brings out your philosophy and life attitude. If they dont ask men about that, well, it’s a poor journalism…

      • MrsB says:

        In fairness, I think I remember interviews with Simon Cowell and George Clooney where they have been asked the same question. Though, I’m sure women do get asked a ton more than guys (in celebrity world and real life)

      • TheOriginalKitten says:

        It’s a question she’s already answered a MILLION times.

        Simon Cowell is a hell of a lot less interesting than Oprah and has accomplished far less so I understand it more if he gets asked that question. I’m just surprised that the interviewer couldn’t come up with anything more original.

        @kiddo-Even if you don’t like Oprah as a person (personally I’m indifferent to her) I don’t see how you can’t admire and respect how much she’s accomplished. Hell, she’s the only black billionaire in North America AND she’s a woman.

      • Kiddo says:

        I think it’s fantastic what she has accomplished. Don’t get me wrong, she worked very hard, but it’s her personality and ego that is off-putting to me. You can respect the efforts and achievements, but not be enamored with the person.

      • TheOriginalKitten says:

        “You can respect the efforts and achievements, but not be enamored with the person. ”

        Well of course. I feel like that about a lot of celebs.

    • Virgilia Coriolanus says:

      I’m actually the same way–I’ve never been someone to dream of my wedding day, of my wedding dress, or think of all the names of my kids when I was a little girl–I think it depends on the person. I’m someone who does want to have kids (well, I’m not particular on how I get them, but you get my drift), and I do want to get married one day–but I’ve never been someone to let that dominate my thoughts, I suppose. I don’t know how to explain it. Like I want those things–but I would be perfectly fine if I never had a boyfriend/got married (the kids things is non negotiable :) ). But I wish they’d ask guys the same question.

    • SE says:

      (FYI for those unfamiliar with the term: CF stands for “childfree.”) I am also CF and also never had any similar thoughts and/or impulses myself.

      And someone above mentioned that if Oprah (or Jen A.) weren’t famous, no one would care about their choice re: having kids – in my experience, that’s not true. You might be amazed at how some people think it’s their right or business to judge and comment. Someone I hardly know the other day told me I had to have kids, or who will take care of me when I’m old… it’s called “bingo-ing” and it happens a lot to childfree people, esp. CF women.

  5. GoodNamesAllTaken says:

    I think it’s wise, mature and extremely honest to admit that your desire to succeed would outweigh your desire to be a good mother, and to choose to remain childless if you feel that way.

    • Belle Epoch says:

      Well put! When I read the headline I thought “how sad” but the interview makes it clear she realizes she could not do All Things Oprah and have kids who would not turn out resentful.

      I’m going to get in trouble for this, but Ivanka Trump has the same passion for her work and is throwing two kids into the mix. I think they are going to grow up angry, just as Oprah says. I’ve known a lot of kids who got everything except time from their parents, and they feel it.

      • Melissa says:

        The difference between with Ivanka is that she is wealthy and if she can easily make time and space for her children. It’s a little different when you are building and hosting a TV show with extremely long hours and a different set of topics every single day.

    • LadySlippers says:

      Agreed GoodNames, I admire people that have enough self worth and the ability to be so self aware to realise that parenthood wasn’t or isn’t for them. I see too many people that shouldn’t be parents not know that about them until way after they brought children into the world. It’s the children that suffer. And not everyone wants to be a patent either. Nothing wrong with that either.

  6. AG-UK says:

    She is being honest. I love my son but that doesn’t mean I want to offer myself out for babysitting. It’s hard work and it’s not for everyone especially if you are driven like she seems to be.

  7. bowers says:

    I never wanted children, and I’m 62 now and have no regrets on that. There are many women out there who shouldn’t have had children but did.

    • KromBoom says:

      “There are many women out there who shouldn’t have had children but did.”

      Exactly. Except it’s only childless women who are asked the question, again and again, about why they don’t have kids. People never seem to ask bad parents “Why did you have kids?”

    • JH says:

      Good for you Bowers!

      I am in my thirties, have never wanted kids and don’t think I ever will, but sometimes I’ve wondered if I’ll regret it, but that would be an awful reason to have them!

      A friend of mine is in her 50s, never had kids and whenever someone (some parents have said this) says to her in a condescending way “Well, you’ve left it too late to have them”, she just says “And you’ve left it too late not to”.

  8. nicole says:

    Omg the amount of resources I sucked from my parents haha. I look back now and can see why my mom would say, “Just let me be for 20 minutes; that’s all I ask”! It’s just the nature of having children. Fact-what was once yours, is now theirs. There’s no shame in being honest.

  9. Anon says:

    I really hate to be that guy when a smart, powerful woman is giving an honest interview and there are so many more important comments I could make about the ideas behind her words . . . but does anyone know who makes that turquoise dress with the balloon sleeves? It is lovely.

  10. Violeta says:

    I think that’s amazing and honorable, especially in a society who pressures women into a way that not having children = not an accomplished woman… Plus it sucks even more when parents have kids just because they want to see what they’d look like or feel that it’s some sort of “tradition” or something.

    • MCraw says:

      Hey, I don’t have kids, but one of the reasons I one day want to is because I want to know what they look like. Isn’t that part of the fun of child bearing?

      The comments on this blog has become increasingly judgy over tiny things (all that back and forth on the 1st comment, oy). It’s just… No fun.

  11. Kemper says:

    I’m not even related ti Oprah and I can’t stand her. What kind of egomaniac puts themselves on every copy of their magazine?

    • TheOriginalKitten says:

      If only every “egomaniac” on this earth donated as much money ($300-$400 million last I checked), time and energy to worthy and charitable causes then the world would be a better place.

      I’m fine with her putting herself on the cover of her magazine, as long as she keeps setting up charities like The Oprah Winfrey Foundation, which helps those in need for education access and programs for women and children.

      Perspective, ya know?

      • Melissa says:

        Dear Kitten, now it seems like donating to charity is a sin because you know billionaires….

      • Myrto says:

        She *is* an egomaniac actually and everytime she donates money, she has to do it in such a public way, making it all about her.
        Sorry, I find her absolutely insufferable and am constantly baffled by the worship she inspires in so many Americans.

      • TheOriginalKitten says:

        “everytime she donates money, she has to do it in such a public way, making it all about her.”

        I’m pretty sure the children in developing countries who are finally getting a school really don’t GAF about how “public” Oprah is with her donations.

      • Patricia says:

        Myrto, Oprah is setting an example. She’s a public figure and she is aware of the amount of people who look to her and emulate her. By doing it publicly and showing how happy and fulfilled it makes her in a public way she is encouraging others to do the same, and do you really think the people who are assisted by her donations care whether or not she made a big deal about it in public!? No, they are just happy to have the help.

      • Myrto says:

        @Kitten@Patricia: I hate the way she donates money, not the fact that she donates money. I find it offensive and indecent how she always manages to make everything about her, whether it’s building a school in South Africa or the recent actress roundtable. I also dislike the way she’s worshipped (there’s no other word) by her fans and the kind of self-help/positive thinking/consumerism crap she promotes.

      • TheOriginalKitten says:

        @Myrto-I’m not wild about the self-help stuff either but I respect the woman for all that she’s accomplished.

        The thing is, if you google Oprah’s donations to charity-you will find countless examples of charities she’s given to and never has she advertised it, from $100K to a Boston bombing victim to signing a bone to be auctioned off for an animal charity. $400M is a LOT of money-think about how many different organizations prospered from her generosity.

        I’m not an Oprah stan by any means, but I think it’s important to give credit where it’s due, especially when people like the Waltons and the Koch brothers sit on billions of dollars while still paying slave wages to their employees.

      • Myrto says:

        Kitten, you’re right. I’m sure she encouraged people to donate money themselves to various charities. Again, I’m no saying she’s not generous. I just wish she donated without trumpeting.

      • LadySlippers says:

        What upsets me is there are hundreds of men with much larger egos that never face any backlash. Donald Trump makes Oprah look like a self-effacing mouse and no one blinks at The Donald. (Sorry this guy makes me want to vomit)

        To me, Oprah is proud of her accomplishments without being super overbearing. She did the near impossible:
        be a women of colour that came from a poor background and became, not only a billionaire, but a household name. How many little girls can go into a store and see a ‘real woman’ (overweight and not photoshopped to look like a twig)? Or a woman that’s truly accomplished and made a difference in the world? Today, lots can and that’s due almost solely to Oprah.

        Love or hate Oprah all you want. But please respect what she’s accomplished. And be fair — if you throw her under the bus, please grab the hundreds of men doing the same thing you’re accusing her of doing and throw them under the bus too.

        (That’ll be a lot of bodies littering the road. So throw them under different buses on different roads, k? I don’t want to recreate the Hotel Rwanda scene. *shudder*)

    • annaloo. says:

      I totally support Oprah putting herself on the cover! At the time O came out having her face amongst a sea of size -2, aged 14, Euro-beauty defined models was a refreshing change. Lack of diversity is still pervasive at magazine racks today. While waiting for subway trains in Manhattan, it’s a game with me to do counts of blonde cover models. Redheads, Asians ad so many others are rarely represented, much less a black woman over the size of 4 and over 50.

      And we know her life story, esp the background of sexual abuse. She has paid her dues. Heck, if she wants to put her face on cookies while chanting from her mountain in Maui, I say go for it. I still really admire her, she helped a lot of people embrace their emotions and own up to who they were and what they wanted in life. Keep staying on that cover, O!

    • V4Real says:

      “What kind of egomaniac puts themselves on every copy of their magazine?”

      Well the mag is called O for a reason. It’s her magazine just like The Oprah WInfrey Show was her show. I guess you can say this is her show in print.

      • LadySlippers says:

        Plenty of men do the exact same thing and no one blinks an eye.

        She’s a trail blazer for women AND women of colour. Bravo to her.

      • We Are All Made of Stars says:

        Will you stop saying that men like Donald Trump are never criticized? He is a buffoon and has been the constant butt of jokes for DECADES. It isn’t lifting women up to pretend that their counterparts are never criticized. It’s untrue and therefore utterly condescending. Good for her for not having children that she never wanted in the first place, but she is still an egomaniac with the best of them (Donald, are you listening?) and the garbage that she gets away with promoting in the name of the dignity and well-being of womankind is unbelievable.

  12. Sarah says:

    this is so much better than women like Marissa Mayer who work 130 hours a week (!) and still have children. thats just so unfair to the kids. why have them if you never have time?
    ask children how that makes them feel.

  13. Melissa says:

    I love what she says about not having children and she seems to be fine with it. Women should be allowed to be comfortable about their decision to or not have kids, they shouldn’t be judged or criticized for it either way.

    What she says about generosity is the same. I’m not a billionaire, but I do well and some people take advantage of that as if it’s your duty to help them if you’re doing a little better, while others genuinely need the help. It’s hard to tell a difference and create some boundaries.

    This is the best Oprah has looked because I think she’s at that point in her life where she doesn’t worry too much about dieting like she used to in the past. She is always a great read.

    • floretta50 says:

      If you analyze what Oprah is saying, it seem to me she thinks that the women who have children and also work and have a career have kids that are messed up! Because they cannot be good at both.Oprah do not have kids but she has dogs, pets, are they being neglected? Why is she so offensive against people who have the right to make other choices. I could understand if she just said the good lord did not bless her with children but she is okay with it. Oprah you are a barren woman that is why you do not have children, I am sure if she got pregnant she would have kept it..

      • TJ says:

        Actually Oprah did have a child when she was a teenager that was still born. She could have kids but choose not to. Also I don’t feel she is being negative to working mothers at all. She is saying she could not have HER career and been a great mother. HER career required much of her and she knew the sacrifices she would have to make to be a mother. I commend her for knowing what she wanted and not succumbing to pressure from society to become a mother.

  14. linlin says:

    I think it’s kind of great that a such high-profile, popular woman says that she never wanted kids and is happy that way. There’s so much pressure on women having kids or telling women that they aren’t good people but selfish or even not “real” women for not wanting kids.

  15. Mimz says:

    As a soon to be 28 year old woman, I have been helping raising my nephews since I was 14 and I consider them my children as well. But I have no desire whatsoever to have children of my own. Maybe one day I will think differently, but I also know a lot of women who deeply regret having children for the most stupid reasons – keep a man, save a marriage, to have a baby to play with, oops I didn’t know I was pregnant – and they resent their children and that’s not fair.
    Having children should be planned, carefully thought decision.
    So props do Oprah.
    And about the money thing I think its sad that happens, people only asking for high sums and probably not planning on paying back, that happens even in our lives when people think “oh, but you have a job” equals having loads of money and not having anything to spend it on or bills to pay.

    Anyway… I’m a fan, props to her.

    End of rant lol.

  16. Patricia says:

    I wish more women would be strong enough to admit that they don’t want children, instead of having children and trying to engage in full time careers, thinking that they are superwoman who can do it all. Let me tell you, from my experience as a nanny, you are NOT doing it all if you are paying someone else to do the majority of child rearing. Your children miss you and feel your absence profoundly.
    It’s not antifeminist to say that women should choose between a full-time, full throttle career and having children, it’s just reality. Unless your partner is able to be home, you are going to have to make some sacrifices. It’s sad when so many women feel like they are just supposed to have children but won’t sacrifice career. Then what are you sacrificing? The children! I am not saying don’t work as a mom, but if your career is hugely demanding and overwhelming and you refuse to change that then yeah, don’t have kids.

    • Esti says:

      That’s fine as long as you apply the same standard to men — but somehow when people rant about women working too much to be good parents, they never seem to say the same about men (who vastly outnumber women as executives, movie and tv stars, partners in law firms, politicians, and other demanding careers).

      • Nerd Alert says:

        That would require changing society’s expectations, though. Men just aren’t expected to be in their children’s lives like women are. Women can’t really run away like men can. Personally, I think when a person chooses a demanding career, children have already taken a backseat to some other priorities, male or female. It’s just that females are the ones who are traditionally expected not to do this.

      • Patricia says:

        Esti you are correct. I should have said the entire thing about men AND women. I guess what I mean is that if you are going to be a parent, man or woman, you can’t have a career that takes 100% of your focus.

    • anon33 says:

      Yeah, um, too bad that this isn’t possible for most people financially.

  17. amarie says:

    I have read several pieces on childless male celebrities in which they were asked about their thoughts on children or why they didn’t become fathers. Some answered honestly; another I am thinking of gave an evasive answer. Often any answer is the wrong answer. I think people’s childbearing choices, man or woman, celebrity or not, IS THEIR OWN PRIVATE BUSINESS. But they get asked because people want validation for whatever road they took. I am glad I have my one child. I know parenthood isn’t for everyone, and another’s choice has no bearing on me or vice versa.
    Good for Oprah for being true to herself!

  18. Sarah says:

    I have 4 kids. 100% of my paycheck has gone to and will continue to go to paying for college for them…and they still will have to take out student loans. My husband and I do this happily but you can bet I look forward to the day when my paycheck goes toward what I want for myself . Yes. Children are a vacuum of resources physically emotionally and most definitely financially. One good thing about all this is my deep seated sadness about them leaving the nest (6 years…) is somewhat counterbalanced by the fact that soon-ish hubs and I will be really set financially (10 years…last kid out of college).

  19. Thiajoka says:

    I agree about the kids thing–stop asking women who don’t have them why they don’t. At least she’s honest as to why she doesn’t want them. But the rest of it–this is why I stopped liking her many years ago, because if you don’t know how great and generous Oprah is, just wait because she will tell you herself.

  20. yeahright says:

    Yeah the person I was before I had kids would have hated me as well. I hate her whole “I am too ambitious to have children” concept…. Martin Luther King had 4 kids so shove it ya smarmy cow.

  21. Gorgonia says:

    I’m hot an huge Ophrah fan, but I really can’t stand the very fact women have always to justify thermselves or to give explaition if they don’t want to have children. Why people don’t ask men the same?

    To have children is a wonderful thing, when it’s a personal choice, not a moral obligation, nor something coming out from conformism.

  22. Chickie Baby says:

    I’m childless by choice, and it’s not a big deal to my friends who DO have kids. There are times when they are envious of my quiet (i.e. kid-free) house, but there are times when I am envious of all the fun stuff they get to do with their kids—the time they spend as a family at ball games and school functions and everything else. And kids ARE expensive to raise. That’s not an insult—it’s just how things are in this world. But raising them to be good people seems to be an important thing, and I’m honored to be included in their lives as an “Aunt” who gets to do stuff with them, and at the request of the kids. Sometimes it’s fun to be the Guest-By-Request at events, just so Real Mom can have a two hour break from all of it.

  23. Oceansoul89 says:

    Correct me if I’m wrong but, wasn’t she raped and impregnated and her son that was born later died? I think this would be a big factor in her decision not to have children. That and I remember her saying that her harsh upbringing and childhood are factors as well. I know my fiance does not want to have children because of the abuse he suffered as a child. I think he fears becoming like his parents.

  24. Mitch Buchanan Rocks! says:

    Oprah and Madonna would be good candidates for being BFFs as they seem to have a lot of similarities. They are not too far apart in age as well.

  25. Green Eggs and Ham says:

    Very good interview and thankfully she has some self- awareness.

  26. Jarredsgirl says:

    Did she just compare herself to Martin Luther king? Oprah, YOURE A TALK SHOW HOST. Being famous is not enough to put you in the same category.

    • neha says:

      She actually didn’t compare herself to MLK – all she said was that she dreamed of becoming MLK. She never said “…and I did!”. He was simply her her role model, and she aspired to change the world like him. Secondly, I would say that Oprah has had a HUGE impact on the world. She is so much more than a talk show host. Just like MLK was so much more than a preacher. And, Ghandi was so much more than a lawyer. And, so on. Your job doesn’t determine your impact on the world.

  27. Bella Bella says:

    Omg, Bedhead, when I read your comment that your daughter was “little vacuum of resources” I was so happy that another mom was speaking honestly. I love my children more than life itself but its not always a sunny day. Just because I’m a mom doesn’t mean I am no longer a human being with my own interests and desires. Thank you for your honesty!

  28. Caz says:

    Ooh Oprah has a very high opinion of herself doesn’t she. Do any of her minions actually say no to anything she asks? She seems too much of a control-freak and self-absorbed to be a parent.

  29. MAC says:

    I am Gayle without the kids. My husband and I have gone through a grieving process. I do not follow Oprah but I agree about what she says about her having chidden. I think it is a true statement and she did not make it a blanket statement she just said what was true for her. I applaud her for her honesty.

    Before I read this I ran into a dear friend at the store and she said the same thing about all working moms, and I thought that is a bit judgmental.

    I like that she said her kids. Again I was leaving the store and a mother and daughter were behind me in line saying they were so sick of seeing Oprah photo shopped on the front of her own magazine. They were ripping her apart. That type of talking especially when you see a parent and adult child do it is sad to me.

    • We Are All Made of Stars says:

      It’s negative to you to see a young woman have an opinion on photoshopping and its attendant disingenuousness? So essentially they were not fangirls like you are and could view Oprah through a critical lens. I think I see why you are upset.

  30. Maya says:

    I admire a woman who is strong enough to say that she doesn’t and have never wanted children. There are many female celebs in Hollywood who doesn’t want any children but are afraid to admit that fact – instead some uses the media and public to gain sympathy etc.

    As for the Oscars – if there is any justice in the Oscar world the Best Supporting Actress will go to Lupita. She was breathtakingly stunning and heartbreakingly good as the slave in 12 Years A Slave – she truly deserves the award more than Oprah and especially Jennifer Lawrence & Julia Roberts. Just because Jennifer Law is currently the flavor of the year it doesn’t mean she deserves the awards.

  31. Vera says:

    I appreciate Oprah’s honesty. If you know that you are not cut out to have kids, then why have them?

  32. Red says:

    How did an Oprah post become a tug of war about having kids? Chill out, internet ;-)