Candy Spelling to Tori: ‘Stop blaming your parents & take responsibility’

Tori Spelling

These are some photos of Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott last weekend. They were enjoying a couple’s massage because their therapist thought it might help. I’ll spare you my (unavoidable) thoughts on Dean’s probable “happy ending.” Their reality show is still filming, but I don’t understand the timing. The show only contains six episodes, and three have aired already. Lifetime will probably drag this stuff out for another season. Or five.

Here’s a fun distraction. Candy Spelling has written a new book called Candy at Last. This isn’t Candy’s first book, but this one seems geared towards correcting Tori’s habit of misinformation. Candy acknowledges that she may not have been the greatest mother, but she’s tired of Tori playing the “poor little rich girl” act. Candy also says that Tori asks her for gifts and will shut her out of her grandchildren’s lives if Candy says no. Radar has some excerpts:

Dean McDermott isn’t the only person making Tori Spelling’s life a living hell these days. As her marriage crumbles and her TV show tanks, the reality star’s mom, Candy Spelling, is reigniting their long-running feud in an explosive new tell-all, Candy at Last – and only RadarOnline.com has all the details!

“I am by no means saying that I am the perfect mother now or I didn’t make mistakes when my children were growing up,” Candy writes in the bombshell book. “Having said that, I also believe that there comes a time when you have to stop blaming your parents. Take responsibility for your own actions and attitudes.”

And speaking of Tori’s actions, Candy spends plenty of time rehashing her daughter’s affair with McDermott in the memoir, as the Tori, 40, and McDermott, 47, deal with his latest infidelity on True Tori.

Recalling the period when Tori hooked up with McDermott, Candy writes, “Our daughter, Tori, had been incommunicado since an abrupt divorce from her husband, Charlie [Shanian]. Aaron was disappointed about her divorce, and since then, she had refused to speak to any of us on the phone. I was devastated about Tori and [Aaron] was angry,” she reveals. “He left her numerous messages on her cell phone. I tried reaching her as well. Not surprisingly, we didn’t hear back from her.”

The next time Candy saw her daughter was at Aaron’s funeral in late June 2006.

“Tori and Dean walked into Aaron’s service and took seats in the back row,” she remembers. “It was very emotional because I didn’t know if she was going to show up. This was my first time seeing my new son-in-law Dean. A friend of mine couldn’t bear the awkwardness. ‘This isn’t right,’ he said.”

And after another “uncomfortable” run-in following the funeral, Candy, 68, writes, things only got icier as their family drama got splashed across the tabloids.

“It was hard not to take what was being written personally,” she insists. “With time I’ve come to understand it better. Tori really is so much like her father. She is very talented and has the ability to capture the attention and imagination of the American public with her storytelling.”

But just as soon as the feud began, it was finished when Tori gave birth to her first child, Liam, in 2007. “We have never discussed that painful period in our lives when we didn’t speak,” Candy admits. “We just tried carefully to move past it. I like to think that it was her pregnancy that paved the way for us to resolve our issues.”

Nevertheless, it hasn’t been happily ever after. Candy says she’s realized “when I denied Tori an extravagant purchase, it resulted in radio silence.”

[From Radar Online]

That was some pretty sly shade from Candy. She tossed out a backhanded compliment about how Tori’s such a great storyteller just like Aaron Spelling. That’s Candy’s way of telling the world that Tori is full of crap and has been crafting her own image through the tabloids. I have to give the girl credit — Tori has led a pretty lengthy career based upon her “reality” of a life that’s really not that interesting. Tori has hustle. I shouldn’t cheer for Candy because she’s probably not the most truthful person either.

* Episode Three of True Tori has aired with more therapy for Tori and Dean. This episode showed Dean recoiling in physical pain while Tori talks about the day he cheated on her. Tori said, “It’s creepy to think that someone could be that good of an actor. Raising your kids and this to me, was done, right in the middle of loving you. Like, I was giving you and our family 100 percent and this is where we were. We were at a Christmas event. I was taking pictures of the kids in fake snow. I had all four kids there by myself, managing them, and you called me and we talked to you on FaceTime and I was like, ‘Oh, daddy’s busy, he’s working.’ And this is the memory I have of that Saturday.” Dean grabbed his head and said it felt like he was being stabbed in the eye.

* Dean and Tori are still whining about their sex life. Tori is upset that she’s never good enough for Dean, who admits he is “insatiable.” He also talks about how he “wasn’t attracted” to Emily Goodhand. She was “just like a warm body.” Then Tori and Dean both lamented how neither one of them ever gives the other compliments anymore. They both want the other to say stuff like, “You’re so hot, baby!” Their therapist responded, “You’re both completely insecure!

Here’s Tori getting a new tattoo while filming her reality show on 5/1. Is it a “Dean Forever” tattoo? That wouldn’t surprise me.

Tori Spelling

Candy Spelling

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet, WENN & Turner Pub Co

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103 Responses to “Candy Spelling to Tori: ‘Stop blaming your parents & take responsibility’”

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  1. Hiddles forever says:

    It is difficult to take responsibility for that ‘disaster’ she chose to marry… Easier to blame it on the others I guess…

    • wiffie says:

      This makes me love the spellings more. Celebrities- they’re just like us! This is totally relatable to me right now. My Family gets in these spats, and it sucks because people keep writing and publishing books as kind of a passive aggressive silent treatment/telling off. It’s like talking about someone loud enough when they’re in earshot, but they can’t get a word in because it’s ink, baby! Suck it! Then they write another book, then I write one. “well SOMEONE is being a lame mom! By me” “well SOMEONE is a brat! By mom”

      Haha. Oh spellings, and your TOTALLY RELATABLE family drama! Keeping it real.

      • abby says:

        LOL! Exactly what i was thinking. They are arguing via Amazon/NYT Best Sellers.

  2. Kara says:

    He’s gross and looks like he has smelly balls. Gag.

    • kimber says:

      I just never got why she wanted him? He always looks dirty and he obviously was one of those guys thay has to be liked…i always have a raised flag at guys like that bc they’re crafty MFers.

      • Kara says:

        Yea I don’t get it either he looks like he hasn’t showered in days. Was he better dressed or showering more frequently pre-Tori? Maybe she thought he had that “bad boy” look?…

    • Kelli says:

      HA! HA! Kara you made me laugh! And you’re probably right. 😛

    • Tiffany :) says:

      Hahahahaha!!!

  3. dorothy says:

    Time to grow up and stop blaming everyone but yourself for your stupid choices. Including putting your pathetic marriage and it’s breakdown on TV.

  4. QQ says:

    Candy, Like me, Recognizes she birthed a Trash Pile

    • Rie526 says:

      Haha! QQ, your comments make my day… Every time!

    • Cecilia says:

      @ QQ

      Do you have one of those trash pile daughters? If so, condolences. I have a couple friends with their own trash piles.

      *giggling at trash piles*

    • JennySerenity says:

      QQ, as always, you call it like it is…:D

      I find Candy Spelling to be totally narcissistic, with questionable parenting skills, BUT- regarding her comments about her daughter- right ON!

    • Nina W says:

      You don’t get to pick your family, not your kids, not your parents, not your siblings. You get what you get and many times you get headaches, heartaches and trash-piles. Your comment is spot on.

  5. TX says:

    It pains me to say, but I may agree with Candy. At some point, you either choose to be helpless and blame your parents for your life, or you shake it off and determine how your life will be for yourself.

    • Froggy says:

      I agree. We’re all responsible for our own happiness. My childhood had its moments but after a certain age, that shouldn’t be an excuse anymore. Jmo.

  6. Tatjana says:

    I can’t imagine having such a crazy relationship with my family. Tori has her faults, but to have a mother who is openly bashing her in the press is horrible.
    Also, I can’t imagine not helping someone in my family financially if they strugle and I have money.

    • Tori isn’t struggling though, and I highly doubt her mother doesn’t help her out–like by buying the kids clothes or toys–I bet she doesn’t give her money–which is the issue. Tori just moved into a 10k a month house…..she’s got a shit ton of stuff in storage….she’s not broke. She’s even said that she’s not broke.

      And even if Tori was broke–I still wouldn’t give her money. I would buy her kids clothes/toys/whatever they needed, and buy her groceries, but I would not give her money. She’s a grown ass woman. If she’s not making enough money (her AND her husband) to support the kids that SHE brought into this world, then it’s her problem. No one forced her to have four kids, and spend an obscene amount of money on crap she doesn’t need. Downsize.

      • Shedayz says:

        This is exactly my tactic with my very own trash pile. I have never let the baby go without, but you need to get your shit together and support yourself. You hungry? Come by for family dinner. You need clean clothes? Sure, use the washer. But I am not ever going to give you money. Teach a man to fish and all that…

    • word says:

      Tori did this to herself. She cheated on her first husband to be with Dean. Dean cheated on his wife to be with Tori. She knew he was a cheater…and she’s a cheater also. I don’t feel sorry for her at all. It’s also funny how Tori keeps complaining about her financial issues but that didn’t stop her from popping out child after child. If you can’t afford to have 4 kids, then don’t have them. Her mom shouldn’t have to give Tori money. That money was earned by her father and he left her a very small amount in his will. She wasn’t even speaking to her father when he died so she should be happy he left her anything at all.

    • Tatjana says:

      I’m not really familiar with Tori apart from the bits I read here. She lives in a 10k per mont house? Jesus.
      Her 4 kids are her responsibility, but Candy is still their grandmother and her mother. But then again, I also don’t understand grandmothers who charge their sons and daughters for babysitting or parents who charge their kids rent, but that’s apparently the norm in America.

      • word says:

        Grandparents don’t have to be financially responsible for their grandkids. That’s the parent’s job. I do agree, grandparents should not charge a fee to babysit their own grandkids. But on that note, some parents take the free babysitting for granted and expect it way too much.

      • Tatjana says:

        I know that, I didn’t mean she’s responsible for them. I just think they should help out in times of need. Just as much their kids should help them if they need it.
        I thought Tori was in a worse state, but judging by her 10k house, she obviously isn’t . I guess bankrupcy has a different meaning in celebrity world.

      • Montrealise says:

        I think parents should help out their kids when they fall on hard times through no fault of their own – job loss, illness or disability, for instance – but not if the kids are in financial doo-doo because they lived beyond their means. Can’t pay your medical bills? Yes, I’ll help. Can’t pay your credit card bills because you bought all kinds of things you couldn’t afford? You figure it out

      • word says:

        @ Montrealise

        I agree.

      • Original Lee says:

        I see both sides of this conversation.

        I know parents who expect the grandparents to watch their kids at the drop of a hat, day in and day out, take their kids to and from, etc and heaven forbid the grandparents aren’t able to accommodate the parents schedule, then it’s a huge deal.

        Then there’s pitting the grandparents against one another – “well MY parents watch the kids all of the time, why can’t YOUR parents just watch them this weekend?” Because they’re your kids. Duh. Not theirs. Be grateful when the grandparents do babysit the kids and don’t ruin a good thing by complaining when they don’t.

        Hire a babysitter. Grandparents are not your built in nanny. I would imagine reasons like the one above are why some grandparents decided to start charging a fee.

        On the whole I wouldn’t say that grandparents charging babysitting fees or parents charging their adult children rent is the norm. Most parents do not mind helping out their children if they’ve fallen on hard times – but Tori’s mismanagement of money is all her own. There’s a difference between losing a “normal” person job and making ends meet, and Tori’s inability to downsize.

      • Bridget says:

        @Tatjana: Tori’s problem’s with her family stem from her first marriage. She and Charlie had this enormous, million dollar, Gatsby-themed wedding at the Spelling house, but within a year (or was it 14 months) she had met Dean, had an affair, and left Charlie, even having their marriage counselor break the news to Charlie. Aaron and Candy Spelling were horrified by how Tori handled all of this, and were dead set against Dean, which was the ultimate source of the conflict between Tori and Candy. Then when Aaron died and Tori didn’t inherit much, she crafted this “poor Tori” story. Realistically, she would have had a trust set up for her years ago (inheritance taxes here in the states are pretty hefty) and she had actually earned a lot of money over the years, since she very steadily worked as an actress. Tori has blown through an incredible amount of money if she’s really broke, and with the way she treated both her ex Charlie and Dean’s ex Mary Jo, there’s a reason why no one feels particularly bad for her.

        And side note: it’s not an American thing to have grandparents charge like that. The US is an enormous country with a lot of people from a mishmash of cultural backgrounds and identities, so it can be hard to characterize a cultural norm as American, but that’s definitely still not a common thing. The rent part would be more likely in terms of trying to get an older child to work and take responsibility, but its not like all American families do that.

      • MorticiansDoItDeader says:

        My mom charged rent at my behest when I started living in one of her rental properties. We eventually took on the mortgage, purchased the house and added a second story. It was only fair, seeing as though she could have rented it out for profit. That being said, she watches the kids for free at the drop of a hat when I’m called into work. I don’t feel like she would be as happy to do it if I hadn’t shown my appreciation by paying rent all those years. It’s about respect and neither tori not candy have it for each other. Also, as a mother, I would take the high road and refrain from commenting on the state of my daughter’s life. She should know the public is intelligent enough to realize that Tori is attempting to save her dying career with all of these sTORIes.

      • Janet says:

        Good lord, I would never dream of charging money for babysitting my little grandson. He’s the joy of my life. At the same time, don’t expect me to be on call 24/7 for babysitting. If I’m available, fine; if I’m not, hire a sitter.

      • Tatjana says:

        I guess I though it was the norm because the couple of Americans I know had it like that.
        I was babysitted by my grandparents when my parents were at work 5 days a week until I wen’t to high school ( I have a younger sister so grandma watched her, I would have been left by myself sooner if it wasn’t for her). I could have gone to kindergarden, but no one even thought of that because grandma was retired and lived next door. Here, that is pretty much a given.
        As for paying rent, it’s absolutely unthinkable to charge family anything. Rent? Of course not. Have a hause on the coast? Family will stay for free.
        But then again, shared households are not that uncommon. People usually move out if they move to another city or get married, it’s not shamefull to live with your parents.
        People here generally don’t charge for things unless it’s proffesionall business. I’ve babysitted for family, neigbours, mowed the lawn, helped out with various things, all for free.

        As for Tori, I had no idea she was so messed up

      • Inconceivable! says:

        @Tatjana – And Tori’s program has not shown her three nannies and one assistant yet either. Neither Tori nor Dean are running the house by themselves when they claim to be there “alone”.

      • Mrs Odie says:

        If I, as an adult, am living with family in a home that has a monthly rent or mortgage, I would take it upon myself to contribute.

        I’m sure Dean’s cocaine is very very expensive.

  7. Renee28 says:

    At a certain point everyone needs to grow up and take responsibility for their lives. Your parents can’t be your permanent excuse.

  8. Cidee says:

    Candy’s nose looks like an m & m.

  9. Slim Charles says:

    I think Candy is as warm as an iceberg and I would not want her as a mother. Parents can definitely damage children, but even if your parents are to blame for some of the problems in your life, at some point you have to move on and take responsibility for your own happy life.

  10. Oh my Lord–she wasn’t too concerned with him betraying his wife and kid when he was getting it on with HER. If I was her, that’s what I’d be thinking about.

    And I’m less and less inclined to not feel the least bit sorry for Tori, because she trash talked Mary Jo (and her fertility) after she and Dean got together–which is way worse than cheating in my book. That shows what kind of person you are, I think–a lot more than cheating.

    I agree with Candy. Especially considering that Tori came from a rich family, got money when her dad died (and probably while he was still alive), and got jobs based purely on her name–she’s had a lot more advantages than a lot of people her age. It’s pretty sad, in my mind, that the daughter of one of HW’s greatest producers is doing reality shows to make money, when she could’ve gone into producing like her dad (or something other than reality shows).

    • word says:

      Exactly. If it wasn’t for her father, Tori would be working at Wal-mart (no offence to anyone that works at Wal-mart). This girl has zero acting talent. She could have had a much better life but she ruined it for herself. She had all the opportunities but chose to cheat on her husband to be with that loser Dean. Now she’s the one being cheated on. Serves her right.

      • Caz says:

        couldn’t have said it better. plus, Tori seems like a totally unlikeable person.

    • Darkladi says:

      I didn’t know about her taunting the ex wife over infertility. If this is true, it’s a p.o.s move. She would deserve everything she gets

      • claire says:

        She did a bunch of terrible things to Mary Jo, in addition to cheating with her husband. There were the age and fertility digs. There was also a Canadian awards show, that all 3 were in attendance for. Mary Jo really had the most reason to be there; it was her ‘scene’ – she’s a Canadian TV celebrity…Tori was a presenter and not only did she lie to the security staff and tell them that she had a protection order against Mary Jo, which led to Mary Jo being escorted out mid-ceremony, but Tori took digs at Mary Jo during her stint on stage giving out an award. She’s a nasty person. I don’t feel sorry for her at all.

    • Prettytarheelfan says:

      Can you link that story? I’ve read almost everything-I found the Mary Jo Eustace situation fascinating-but I never saw that one. That’s just inhumane. They were in the process of adopting a daughter when he left her for Tori. Wow.

      • claire says:

        http://www.canada.com/topics/entertainment/story.html?id=ba1b55ae-4573-4643-b57f-08345ab90b78. There’s one mention of it. She had just taken digs onstage at Mary Jo, in front of Mary Jo’s peers, and then went backstage and gave an interview saying how it was better to be a young wife and be able to have children. Mary Jo was 48 and they had adopted due to fertility issues.

      • MorticiansDoItDeader says:

        As someone who’s struggled with infertility, you’d be surprised how many people love to comment about how fertile they are after mentioning how difficult it was for me to conceive (and that’s one of the more pleasant comments they’ve made). Makes me want to slap the taste out of their mouth.

        Anyway, it looks like tori is getting a taste of karmic retribution, so no need for a taste of my fist!

      • mugofmead111 says:

        according to the article lined by claire, tori claimed that she and dean wanted lots of kids. well, at least she got what she wanted in that case.

      • Nina W says:

        I’m infertile so I haven’t forgotten that unpleasant scene. I have to add it has been painful to feel the social stigma of being infertile. People have said amazingly cruel things to me, quite thoughtlessly, and it is very difficult to have to constantly discuss a very private and personal situation with any one who feels they have the right to grill me on my state of motherhood. People are very insensitive on this topic. It is not okay to badger people about when or if they are going to have children, it’s no ones business but everyone just butts right in. And I do mean everyone.

      • Nighty says:

        Wow, this was really harsh… I guess I’m lucky, I’ve decided not to have kids because of health reasons and troughout my life, when people asked me about having kids and after I explained the reasons, they have always been quite understanding and would mostly say: Sorry abou that, but you can always adopt if you want to; that would be also awesome; you don’t need to get pregnant to have them; adopt…
        Guess people here are more understanding of it… I don’t know…

  11. RobN says:

    While I agree with Candy, it must be really weird to have been raised with everything, and denied nothing, and then wake up in a world where you have to pay your own rent.

    • But she didn’t really have to go through that until her dad died–and he still left her with nearly a million dollars. She was raised in a rich family, and then got onto a show that her dad was producing–and he most likely made sure that she got PAID…he took care of her. When she got married, he made sure that she had a prenup. And I’m sure that she was always running to them for money, no matter if she had her own money ( I have a cousin who does the same thing, and my uncle isn’t worth half a billion). She had it good, up until she got with Dean. That was her doing though.

      • lucy2 says:

        She had 10 years on a hit show with a long syndication run too. She’s also had book deals and TV shows, all thanks to her father. She should have been set for life 10 times over.

      • original kay says:

        that’s just it.

        she got everything as a kid, including a career. she spent the money from 90210.
        yes, parents should be obligated to also teach the value of money, but her brother isn’t having these issues?
        she’s an entitled cheating brat.

        poor kids.

  12. FingerBinger says:

    The only thing I took from this story is that Tori wasn’t by her fathers side when he was dying.

    • Seapharris7 says:

      I’m fairly sure there was a story about that – how it was a pap or internet article that informed her that her dad died. But if she wasn’t answering their phone calls, that’s pretty possible.

      Oddly I can’t judge Tori on that part, I barely speak to any of my family. This is especially true if I feel ashamed of an aspect in my life (unemployment, money woes, failures of any kind).

      • Montrealise says:

        I don’t think Tori was refusing to speak to her parents because she felt shame of any sort. She was just mad that they weren’t applauding her choice to divorce her husband and weren’t welcoming Dean with open arms.

    • Seapharris7 says:

      Honestly Mont, I’d like Tori a little more if she was embarrassed about cheating on her new husband with a married co-star on a Lifetime movie after daddy had dropped a good amount of money on her wedding. I know I would be… and not still re-hashing that for public consumption year after year.

    • MonicaQ says:

      Nope, by the time she decided to fly out from Toronto, Mr. Spelling had passed away.

  13. Joh says:

    I’m reminded of a Dorothy Parker quote:
    If you want to know what god thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.

    • Size Does Matter says:

      I love Dorothy Parker. How apt.

      Anybody else wondering why Candy wrote the book? It’s not like she needs royalties. Was she bored and needed a project? Or has she just had enough of Tori’s oh-so-public shenanigans? I don’t like the idea of a mother publicly shaming her daughter, but it seems to me like, in this case, Tori is shameless anyway.

      • MonicaQ says:

        I think it’s she’s tired of seeing Tori acting like who done it and why in public. Maybe she’s hoping it’s a wake up call.

    • jjva says:

      what a great quote. I’m keeping that one in reserve.

  14. JLM says:

    Candy’s comment that at a certain point you need to stop blaming your parents and take responsibility for your own actions and attitudes is so dead on. I’m 42, and know way too many people who haven’t moved on from their childhood yet – and I’m not talking about people who were abused or neglected, just regular folks whose parents, much like my own, made some mistakes but were just doing their best. Everyone needs to come to terms with the positives and negatives of their childhoods, learn what they can from it, and move forward.

    • Seapharris7 says:

      I would sincerely hope that people who have kids would stop blaming their parents once they realize what a hard & thankless job being a parent is.

    • Nina W says:

      To be fair, no one ever gets over their parents or their childhood, particularly if it was a traumatic one, but I completely agree with you that, as an adult, you have to let the past go and move on. I’m para-phrasing but I recall a great quote somewhere about parents, first you idolize them, then you blame them, then you forgive them. It’s part of growing up.

  15. lucy2 says:

    “It was hard not to take what was being written personally” says the woman writing another tell all about her family.
    I agree with her that Tori needs to grow the F up already and take responsibility, but let’s not pretend Candy isn’t a few steps behind her on the shameless scale. I pity the children involved here. I hope someone set aside some trust funds for them, for therapy and education.

  16. serena says:

    Well, Candy shouldn’t complain since she’s the one who raised such a rotten spoiled brat such as Tori. It really doesn’t surprise that she refuses to let her mother into her life if she’s not getting something.. but Candy’s right. She’s past the age of complaining and such, she needs to take responsability but that’s not gonna happen right?

  17. eliza says:

    Candy and Aaron KNEW what a POS Dean McVomitt was and Tori has no one to blame for getting cut out big time from his will or by Candy in general.

    No, Candy was NOT Mother of the Year material but seldom are mega rich women who have a giant staff to care for everything, including their own children.

    Tori disgusts me at this point. This is all for attention, money and sympathy. If Tori gave a fig about her own children, she would NOT be doing this farce of a show. She would divorce this creep and try to earn her money in a more respectful manner, and not with the circus she and her repulsive husband have willingly created.

    Tori cheated on her husband with Dean. The left their spouses for each other. WTF kind of man did she think he was going to be with her? He didn’t care about his children in that situation either.

  18. Patricia says:

    I think both Candy and Tori need to take responsibility for the mess of the families they’ve created and shut up already.

    Their problems are not new or even interesting. We’ve all seen it, heard it, or lived it. Who cares about their petty, self-created drama.

    Candy continues to act and look like a complete ass – (I can’t imagine where Tori learned that). Simply saying “I know I wasn’t perfect and made mistakes” doesn’t cut it. That just gives her “permission” to slam her daughter, and there’s simply no excuse for that – on either side.

    I think they’re both lying, manipulative, narsacistic bitches who deserve to be miserable.

    Poor kids.

  19. Lionbdadddy says:

    Candy is right. She needs to accept responsibility for her actions and stop passing the buck onto other people. She had golden opportunities handed to her because her father was able to open doors that would otherwise be slammed shut in her face. She was never the typical Hollywood beauty and she’s not a good actress. I doubt she would have ever been cast in that show if it were not for her father. After BH90210 that she explored other avenues and made money. She has led a very privileged life and I’m not going to feel sorry for her because she squandered her fortune. I dislike that Tori is trying to appear as this woman who we should all feel sorry and sympathetic towards. Not me. Her children are the only ones that I can feel sympathy for. Tori and Dean airing their dirty laundry to make a quick buck, that’s not fair to those children. In my opinion both are manipulating the situation to get media attention and make money of the scandals. It disgust me that this woman tries to reap sympathy for the very thing she did to the ex wife. She knew Dean was a pig and she showed him off as a prized pig when she bagged him.

  20. MonicaQ says:

    I wish my mother would accept the fact that she was a terrible mom. Instead she thinks she was “strong independent black woman that raise 2 kids by herself” not “high school drop out drug addict that let her children be sexually abused”. So perhaps I give Elder Spelling more props than I should but it is refreshing to hear.

    I hear how Tori having kids helped their relationship. I wonder the same for me but kids are still at least 3-5 years away. Some part of me–probably just like Tori–still wants a relationship with her mother because, well, she’s your mom. She’s supposed to care and you’re supposed to care back. It’s hard when it’s one sided.

    • Jaded says:

      I hear you. My mum was no hell when I was growing up but for different reasons. She was typical of her generation – no education, totally dependent on her husband (my dad was awesome BTW), a princess, a control freak, not terribly bright but very, very manipulative, often bitchy, passive aggressive and good at inflicting guilt by pulling the martyr routine. Also deceitful in order to get her way. So we weren’t friendly throughout my teens and early adult life. She just felt like this oppressive, negative energy around me all the time.

      I learned later on to deal with her which was basically shutting her down as soon as she started with her nonsense. Now at 91 she lives with me and she’s softened a good deal, but believe me, I’ve had to clench my teeth and bang my head against the wall many times to deal with her occasional lapses.

      But I’ve come to the realization that even though I don’t like her very much, I love her and want her last years to be with me, and wouldn’t have it any other way.

      • word says:

        She’s lucky to have a daughter like you. I’m in a similar situation though my mother is much younger than yours. She spent our childhood favoring my brother (and still does). He was a nightmare but all she ever wanted was a son and she got one. I was the one ignored and left out. Now I am the one she relies on. I do everything for her and have put my own life on hold. Her son does nothing for her, but I still think she favors him and always will. I could have easily told her to run to her son and tell him to do everything, but I’m a good daughter and can’t do that. Maybe one day she’ll appreciate me.

      • MonicaQ says:

        @Jaded, you are far far more awesome than I think I could ever be. I still have a lot of anger at her (made even worse by the sudden almost cult like devotion she has to her mega-church now) and I hope I can get over it one day like you and word can.

        @word, that was it for me too. She had two girls, me and another she gave up for adoption because she was born addicted to drugs and blind so once she had my brother, it was over. He was the best. Until he stopped being cute and started having his own ideas and opinions. Then I had magically turned him against her.

      • word says:

        @MonicaQ

        I’m definitely not over it and probably never will be. No matter the awful things my mom has said to me (though she denies she’s said anything wrong), I still feel like I have no choice but to be the one to take care of her as she really has no one else. I pride myself on being a good person, but some days I feel so angry and things just feel so unfair…but I guess that’s life. Hopefully I’m racking up some good karma.

      • Tiffany :) says:

        MonicaQ, Jaded, word, you all have my respect. I am sure the challenge of growing up under those circumstances was so intense, it is very telling of your strong character that you have managed to get to where you are now. I wish you all the best, and I am sending some big hugs your way!

  21. JudyK says:

    Dean, take a damned shower, cut your greasey hair, shave, and put on some clean clothes. OMG, he is disgusting. I cannot believe Chopped! Canada renewed his contract.

    Oh, and one more PET PEEVE…take off the STUPID ball cap. My best friend in Tulsa lives in one as an excuse not to wash her hair. She has all the money in the world, and there’s no excuse for it, except that she’s lazy. I’m SO SICK of this ball cap excuse for lack of grooming…over it.

    • littlestar says:

      Judy, you have permission to slap me after I say this, but I like him on Chopped Canada! I think he’s a decent host. I don’t even think of all the drama that surrounds him while I’m watching the show.

      • JudyK says:

        No slap from me! I actually like him on that, too…I was being too harsh. I like anything Chopped! and any food-related show.

      • someone says:

        I like Dean on Chopped Canada more than I like Bill Rancic as the host on Kitchen Casino. For some reason Bill irritates me on that show.

      • JudyK says:

        @ someone:

        OMG, I soooo agree w/ you about Bill Rancic, and I used to like him.

  22. holly says:

    I’ve always told friends that you really know you are an adult when you can stop blaming your parents for everything that’s gone wrong in your life. Growing up means taking responsibility for your own actions and realizing that your parents did the best they could with the knowledge and upbringing they, themselves, had.

    Too bad these losers can still find an outlet to promote their trash and shame on us as a nation that we continue to feed that outlet whether it be magazines, tv “reality” shows, books, etc.

    • word says:

      Not all parents did “the best they could”. Some people are just horrible mothers and fathers period.

  23. someone says:

    Candy reportedly had a boyfriend before Aaron died. Pot kettle Mrs Spelling.

    If Tori is any kind of hands on loving mother to her kids it’s not because she learned it from Candy. Candy admits in her book she should have shown more affection to her kids. For a Mom to say that you know she was a cold fish to them.

    The way this family writes books about each other is like a trumped up “fancier” version of how some families these days fight on Facebook. I’ve seen wayyy too many family fights take place out in the open on Facebook – people should be embarrassed!

    • word says:

      I know someone that has to write a post on her facebook every time she fights with her husband or any family drama she is having. Why do this?

      Also, Candy is filthy rich. Why is she even putting out a book? She doesn’t need the money so why would she air her dirty laundry (not that needing money is a good excuse). I guess she wanted to get out her side of the story.

      • I would guess it would be to combat the ‘rumors’ about Candy not helping Tori out at all–you know, because Tori’s ‘bankrupt’. Up until this reality show/cheating hit, every time there was a Tori post, there were always people saying that Candy was a horrible mother because she didn’t give Tori money.

        Who knows? Maybe Candy felt enough was enough. It’s one thing to have it broadcast on FB, to all your friends and family, and another to broadcast it on the internet–and I totally believe Tori planted all of those ‘woe is me, my mommy won’t give me any $$$$$’ stories. Full stop. Her mother may be nasty (I have no clue), but Tori is nastier than her, imo.

      • word says:

        Yeah I think she just wanted to get out her side of the story. She doesn’t owe Tori any money. If Tori had kept a good relationship with her parents while her father was alive, he probably would have given her millions. That’s her fault.

  24. Anne tommy says:

    No time for either of them but did find it odd that Tori was left what to most people would be a large sum but was a tiny weeny percentage of her father’s wealth. I think most mother’s instincts would have been to pass on to Tori a few million of the half a billion Spelling’s wife got, but apparently not. Seems cold to me. Don’t think Mrs Spelling earned the cash by the sweat of her brow….

    • word says:

      It’s what Tori’s dad wanted.

    • someone says:

      Agreed. The $800,000 she inherited was literally only .16% of the $500 Million of his estate, which went to Candy. While a parent doesn’t OWE their child anything if he wanted to set Tori up so she didn’t have to make stupid reality shows (because honestly what else is she going to do, work at Walmart?) he could have set up a trust fund that paid her an annual allowance that meant she didn’t have to demean herself on reality tv. For that matter, Candy could set one up now but doesn’t.

    • It’s HER money. It doesn’t matter if she physically earned it or not. It’s her money. She is under no obligation to give any of the money to her kids. I don’t see Tori’s brother complaining about not getting any money.

      • idk says:

        Actually, the father left Tori’s brother A LOT more than what Tori got. But I think the son had a better relationship with the parents than Tori did. We need to remember Tori and her parents were not speaking when he died. Her dad didn’t have to leave her anything and neither does her mom. Would you leave money to a child who didn’t even care to answer your calls or visit you?

    • Mixtape says:

      Personally, I think it was a (perhaps misguided) effort on Aaron Spelling’s part to keep Candy in control of Tori’s finances without all the legal requirements a trust would impose on Candy as a trustee. Bear in mind Tori had been earning her own money for years, and perhaps they witnessed her mismanaging it. Between her 90210 and book royalties, she does seem to have blown through an awful lot, but in her defense, one’s perspective on what a “normal” lifestyle is has to be skewed when one grew up in the largest mansion in Hollywood. I think the purpose was not to deprive Tori of money, but to require her to ask Candy for money when she needed it.

    • Boxy Lady says:

      Aaron Spelling earned the bulk of his fortune during his 40 year marriage to Candy. I’m not going to pretend that I know the details of their relationship but I’m also not going to dismiss Candy’s right to inherit her husband’s money. Plus, Candy came from a rich family herself but Aaron came from a working class upbringing. If he thought his wife should have most of the money that he worked for years to earn, then so be it.

  25. Emily C. says:

    At a certain point, you also have to stop publicly complaining about your daughter in order to sell books.

    The reason Candy and Tori don’t get along is that they’re too alike.

  26. MSat says:

    Has anyone watched this show? She is trying SO hard to make us feel sorry for her. It’s not working.

  27. Snowpea says:

    As much as I agree that Tori is probably a spoiled brat, I do feel a large amount of empathy and fondness for her, probably because my mother and her mother are ridiculously similar (they even look alike!)

    My mum told her three kids years ago that we won’t get a cent of her money. She is relatively wealthy by peasant’s standards (her house alone would be worth a couple of mil) but because she believes us all to be slack children she has said she is leaving the lot to charity.

    It does sting, because she was a terrible mum who abandoned her kids and now we are paying the price for her wrongdoing. But what does one do? One tries very hard to NOT be like that.

    My selfish, self absorbed, self serving, narcissistic mother from hell has taught me some very valuable lessons – how NOT to behave! Thanks Ma! 😉

  28. TexasTexasTexas says:

    Tori has an issue with accountability and consequences. She is a cheater who married another cheater and then they bred like rabbits. Regardless of her like or dislike of her mother’s personality, it’s Candy’s money. Aaron Spelling left Tori a nice nest egg. Not much considering the overall fortune, but she’s lucky she got a dime considering she cut them off while he was dying. That had to have broken his heart. He was wise not to pass it down for Dean. It’s not Candy’s responsibility to raise or pay for those children, and considering the mom/daughter relationship, it’s surprising that Tori has enough nerve to expect her mom to get her out of this mess.

    Dean. Ugh. He looks and acts like a creepy pervert. I giggled out loud at the comment that he looks like he has smelly balls. He looks like he’d enjoy nibbling on smelly balls.

  29. MSat says:

    On this new show, Tori just keeps blathering on about how Dean has been her best friend for seven years and she doesn’t know how to function without him and how could this happen? Blah blah blah. It’s unreal to me that she cannot connect the dots between how they got together (CHEATING) and what’s happening now (CHEATING).

  30. GirlyGirl says:

    All 3 of them disgust me.

    And was she talking about Dean when she said “It’s creepy to think that someone could be that good of an actor.”

    cause he’s a Z-list actor (if their is such a list, he’d still have trouble making it)

  31. Chrissy says:

    Tori wanted an extravagant gift, hmm isn’t that a little like the pot calling the kettle black. When I worked in Beverly Hills in the 80’s Candy Spelling was the butt of many greedy jokes from the industry. We heard about her refrigerated furs, etc. No one liked her or the way she treated people. Candy Spelling was born with a silver spoon in her mouth. Who gave her that spoon her Rich parents. She then married money. Tori is her daughter and she can spare a lot of extravagant gifts her way. She is a greedy old lady who will probably leave all her money to her dog. Tori is on reality tv to make a living. I don’t think she should have had all those children, and I think it was terribly unfair to her husband to have that many children at once. Although they are all very sweet and cute 6 years and 4 children is a bit much.

    • Jadzia says:

      I agree with what you say about Candy, but as for the it being unfair to Dean to have children so close together… well, he could have wrapped it up, right? Love, a lady who had 4 kids in 5 years (and yes I suspect we agree that that was crazy).