Aaron Taylor Johnson on his marriage: ‘I just feel secure & loved & safe’

2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party Hosted By Graydon Carter

Aaron Taylor Johnson is 26 years old and the father of two, and stepfather of two. His wife, director/artist Sam Taylor Johnson, is 50 years old. They’ve been married for years now, having gotten together when Aaron was 18 years old. I still think that’s sketchy, by the way. It’s not so much the age difference – although 24 years is a big age difference – it’s the difference in life experience when you’re a 42 year old woman getting involved with an 18-year-old. There is something predatory about it, just my opinion. That being said, Aaron seems very happy, especially these days. He’s got a feature in Mr. Porter where he talks about his happiness, his contentment, his feeling of security at home with his wife and daughters. You can read the full piece here. Some highlights.

He’s happy he didn’t get an Oscar nom: “There is a sense of relief. I’m not ungrateful, nor is this spiteful. It’s just that I can’t handle all the attention.”

What he did to get into character for Nocturnal Animals: “I was drinking crate-loads of cheap beer. Chewing ‘dip’ tobacco, that was the worst thing: Copenhagen’s Wintergreen. It builds up the saliva in your mouth so that you spit. Then you have this terrible, rancid kind of breath. My wife wasn’t very pleased with that one either.” In order to embody the loathsome Ray, he chain-smoked, chain-cracked beers, chain-watched documentaries about serial killers and abstained from cutting his fingernails for three months to “feel toxic inside and out”. He was reluctant to bring such dark energy near his wife and children. Once filming wrapped, there was a three-month-long exorcism of Ray. “When you take on that kind of chemistry and psychological damage, you end up carrying it with you, and you can’t quite get rid of as much as you’d like. So I need to detox. And I see these sort of special gifted shaman women, who do reiki and needle work [acupuncture]. I’ve had a bunch of needles in my eyeballs before. I had it done after working with Oliver Stone [as a drug dealer in Savages].”

He stopped drinking a few months ago: “I’m not in AA or NA or any of those things. I can just stop.”

He only likes to do one film a year:“For a good two to three months on the way out of a character. Then the rest of the time I do more earthy things like gardening or cooking or just being with my kids.” He has also landscaped his allotment on the hillside of their garden. “I like my world to be calm. When you deal with this lifestyle [it can drive you crazy]. That’s why I see half of my friends go off the rails. You can really burn it at both ends, get into drink and drugs.”

Fatherhood versus career:“I get more fulfilment from being a father than I do from being an actor. I’m still constantly wanting to give it up.”

His feminism & feminine energies: He admits that, in addition to “a wife, four daughters, two female dogs and three female chickens”, he also has his own female energies. “I’m happy to say I’m a feminist. Being a feminist is just believing in equal rights. Man, woman, gay, straight, black, white – we’re all in it together.” Mr Taylor-Johnson is currently in the process of printing out thumbnails of all the posters from the global women’s march in January to decorate the family bathroom. “When they are young women, they’re going to be ready,” he says of his daughters. “I mean, their mum is one of the strongest, most independent women I know. A role model.”

Flowers: “Mamma got a dozen on Valentine’s Day. The other girls got half a dozen each.”

He doesn’t analyze his relationship with Sam: “I don’t really analyse our relationship. I just know that it works. I just feel secure and loved and safe. We have this very deep connection. We’re just in synch.”

[From Mr. Porter]

Here’s what I always think when I’m covering Sam and Aaron… if it works, it works and God bless. I wish them well. But there will eventually come a point when Aaron does get reflective about their marriage and their age difference. And I wonder what will happen then. Honestly though, they seem pretty functional. I’d rather deal with a couple like this as opposed to, say, the Affleck-Garners.

2017 BAFTA Awards - Arrivals

Photos courtesy of Ben Weller/Mr Porter and WENN.

 

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93 Responses to “Aaron Taylor Johnson on his marriage: ‘I just feel secure & loved & safe’”

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  1. Jenns says:

    I always side-eye Sam. Just like I side-eye Lainey for being obsessed with them.

    If the roles were reversed, and a 42 year old man went after an 18 year old girl and got her pregnant at 19, this would be a much bigger deal.

    • Kasia says:

      See, I’ve always thought that people made such a big deal out of their relationship because the older person was the woman, not the man. Men date much younger woman all the time and it’s always mostly excused away.

      I do think the fact that they met when he was underage (which is so creepy) is part of it but I honestly don’t doubt that some of it is “why is this hot young dude going out with an unattractive, old lady?” It never seems to bother people as much when young women date old and/or ugly guys.

      • Sam says:

        Umm pretty sure people talk about how weird it is that Leo dates women so much younger. Page Six even did a story about it. And then anytime an older dude is going out with a much younger women and it’s mentioned on here, people talk about how creepy it is.

        It has nothing to do with him being the younger guy and her being the older woman. It has to do with him being underage when they first met and her being 42.

        Heck people even talk about Tyga’s relationship with the younger Jenner. Sorry but it’s just gross and weird when someone older decides that they want to talk to and go out with someone who is in high school/right out of high school.

      • Kasia says:

        I don’t know…I’ve never read a story about this couple where all the comments weren’t how creepy it was. It seems like most of the Leo backlash is always tinged with “he’s so lucky though” from men or some comment about how the girls are in it for his money.

      • Escaped Convent says:

        @ Kasia, I think that is some of it. Whatever the reason, they are happy together. Aaron doesn’t sound like a mainstream guy, and sounds older than his years. Their relationship and their family works. Good for them!

      • Fuzz says:

        Theres definitely a lot of shoulder shrugging when older guys date younger girls. Like at first people will raise a brow and then very quickly settle into it. The other big difference is that in those cases, its the girl who gets the backlash. Its always about what a gold digger she is or she just wants the easy fame or she married a director for her career. Its sexist guys, theres no two ways about it. If the outrage about Sam and him had died down after 8 years of being together, it would be a different case. Instead guys have spent the last eight years waiting for the day he suddenly changes his mind. It aint happening. The guy is happy, leave it be.

    • Emily says:

      I read Lainey’s article about his comments and thought what she said was nice…that you don’t often hear men talking about how their relationship makes them feel secure. But, now that I think about it…he started dating someone old enough to be his mom when he was a teenager. In that light, highlighting the safety and security he feels in his relationship is kind of weird.

      • QQ says:

        Same for me, I mean I deal with a sensitive type myself and I’m not like that at all but I must acknowledge that life isnt an every day struggle with that kind of a man, you know emotionally open and just content to let you know he WANTS to be part of a family and all that other cozy sh*t, we can’t talk about Masculinity so fragile and then not give guys room to be vulnerable and all that

        but that said Here: “They’ve been married for years now, having gotten together when Aaron was 18 years old. I still think that’s sketchy, by the way. It’s not so much the age difference – although 24 years is a big age difference – it’s the difference in life experience when you’re a 42 year old woman getting involved with an 18-year-old. There is something predatory about it, ” <— YES I still keep a side eye for the way this sort of started, I mean he was so so YOUNG ( I however for some reason get a feeling like she is aware and sorta gives him room to maneuver? Idk something about their vibe makes me feel like this won't end over either one of them sleeping with others …like that'd be a non starter)

      • Shambles says:

        Interesting theory, Dr. QQ.

        I could see it. She lets him have his freedom as long as she has his love I guess?

      • Aren says:

        I read somewhere he got cast by her when he was 16. He was also a runaway and into drugs.
        If that’s not predatory, I don’t know what it is.

      • Fuzz says:

        Lol, no he was not a runaway. He had an extensive filmography before they met. He said he was lost before he met her and that he was experimenting and going crazy trying to fill some hole in his life. I remember his words were that she filled that hole. And no she didnt cast him when he was 16. People like to play with that timeline because it makes their criticism feel more valid. Their logic is that if filming started when he was 18 then pre-production started when he was 16. Actually, this was a small budget film and she wasnt even confirmed to direct until weeks before shooting began. In any case, he was 18 at that point and they have both said that they emotionally connected on set and then stuff happened afterwards.

        Its unusual, not ideal but it worked out for them just as it worked out for Celine Dion and Renee or Humphrey Bogart and Lauren Becall and hundreds of others I cant even name right now. Its time to move on.

      • Emily says:

        @QQ – I could see that.

        I think the reaction is sexist in a lot of ways. Taylor-Johnson gets treated like he’s in some unbelievably romantic love story when it’s really just a situation most people can’t wrap their heads around. I mean, the feeling seems to be: why would this young, good looking guy get with this old woman? Must be because he’s SO DEEP IN LOVE. Reverse the sexes and it’s not treated that way. People would just shrug and say, oh she’s a gold-digger or trying to advance her career with that old man.

      • Lolotte says:

        gosh, i tought the exact same thing. *hawww sweet..* Mm. Nope, still weird.

    • Meredith says:

      I agree, Jenns. There’s so much of a “You go, girl” attitude when it comes to her and my reaction is just, “What?!” It’s Hollywood, so it’s not like if a man did this his career would be ruined, but he would definitely get a lot more side-eye from people than Sam Taylor Johnson gets.

      • OhDear says:

        I get that ageism for women is definitely a thing and certainly don’t wish to discount or downplay it. But IMO there’s an element of sexism (?? for lack of a better word) in this – as if a young man can’t also be a victim in a relationship with what to me seems to have predatory elements to it.

      • Meredith says:

        For sure, OhDear. It’s like the difference in reaction when a female high school student is raped by a male teacher and when a male high school student is raped by a female teacher. Chances are if you read about that happening to a male student, they won’t even use the word rape.

    • Jellybean says:

      I agree with you Jenns, a 42/43 year old getting pregnant with a 19 year old is a bit creepy and Lainey would be complaining endlessly about it if the genders were reversed. I agree with you too Kasia, in that most people would have less of an issue if it were an older man. Both attitudes are equally wrong to me,

      • ichsi says:

        +1
        I’m also kinda in a greyish area when it comes to my emotional reaction to this. Like the underage part of it creeps me out. But I also saw the pic he posted for her birthday, and DAMN would I love to have such a hot and lovely husband at her age too. Ahhhhh, conflicted feelings!

    • ell says:

      same. and i completely disagree that if the gender were reversed it wouldn’t be a big deal.

      lainey being obsessed with them is particularly disappointing because she usually call these things out when it’s the other way round, so idk why she’s all over this.

    • S says:

      These two creep me out to no end and I can’t with Lainey’s obsession with them.

      I agree it is PARTLY sexist, in that she’s the older woman, younger man dynamic, but I don’t think that’s MOST of it … If he was 25 when they met, with the same age gap, it would be WAAAYYY different than him being (gag) 16. Sorry, but that’s just NOT OK. It’s not romantic. Not liberated. Not anything but icky.

      The gap between Bruce Willis and his current wife is more than this one, but he didn’t meet her when she was in high school and, if he had, I’d think that was beyond disgusting as well. And, to stay in the extended Willis clan, I never thought Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher were gross or weird or anything bad, because he wasn’t even close to jailbait when they got together.

      No matter what the sex of the older partner, the difference between a guy/gal in his/her 50s dating/marrying someone in their late 20s/early 30s, and the same age gap with the older partner hooking up with someone in their TEENS is, to put it mildly, the difference between swimming in a lake or an ocean.

  2. detritus says:

    That last paragraph is everything I think about this weird and slightly wonderful and slightly offputting relationship, but said better.
    I don’t like the start, I side eye her, they seem super in love and i like that, he’s going to reflect on the age difference at some point and i have no idea how that will roll out.

    The only thing you didn’t cover is, wow, dude is really growing into his looks. I am really liking that beard, and when he says things they are more hippy dippy and less douche bro and that is also pretty lovely.

  3. Lucy says:

    Agreed on the creepiness. That being said, he does seem like a decent guy. And that’s a great shot of him, the b&w one. He does look older, and like someone else (not sure who). I think I’ll watch Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging later today…

  4. Monsy says:

    he was just 18, he was just a kid…. i don’t know, i mean good for them, if it works i guess… i hope they are happy and they stay happy

  5. Sarah B says:

    I feel secure, safe, and loved with my mom, too.

    • Shambles says:

      Lol. Thank you for speaking my mind. That was my first thought when I saw the headline, sorrynotsorry. Mommy issues.

    • anonymous says:

      sarah LMAO, that’s exactly what I was thinking.

    • Aren says:

      Exactly what I was thinking.
      They met and started working together when he was 16, she should’ve adopted him instead of having sex with him.

    • littlemissnaughty says:

      I honestly think that’s part of their dynamic. I don’t even know that I have an issue with it. If that’s what he needs from his partner, fine. People look for all manner of things in relationships, this isn’t the worst.

      They do seem really happy. But I side-eye the crap out of her. Because 18??? It’s so damn young. I’m 32 and 25-year-olds are a stretch for me. I think once he gets to maybe 30-35, he’ll look at 18 year old girls and go “Wow. Really?” Or maybe not. Who the hell knows.

      But good gawd. 18 years old. Yikes.

      • KB says:

        When he’s 35, he’s going to look about two years older than he does right now and he’s going to be married to a 60 year old woman. When he’s 45, he’s going to look 10 years older than he does right now and he’s going to be married to a 70 year old woman. It sucks and it isn’t fair, but the likelihood they stay together through that isn’t very high. No matter how progressive he is and how much he’s into it now.

      • emilybyrd says:

        Yeah. I was thinking that, too, KB.

        I really wonder what Sam’s thought process is about her relationship with him. I mean, she must’ve considered this possible future scenario, right? Where she’s 70 and he’s considered still in his prime at 45. If I loved someone as much as she seems to love him, and had built a life with him and had children with him, I think it would kill me to think about how our age difference would inevitably separate us.

      • emilybyrd says:

        Yeah. I was thinking that, too, KB.

        I really wonder what Sam’s thought process is about her relationship with him. I mean, she must’ve considered this possible future scenario, right? Where she’s 70 and he’s considered still in his prime at 45. If I loved someone as much as she seems to love him, and had built a life with him and had children with him, I think it would kill me to think about how age would inevitably separate us. I think there may be a lot of pain for her in the future as a result of the age difference. It’s not like she just lucked into marriage with a great young guy and life will be just dandy now.

    • Misa says:

      :-( Yes, this is what I immediately thought, too. She is a predator, full stop. It’s not empowering to dismiss the creepiness of her starting “dating” him when he was 17. And she was his director, to boot: can you imagine how much power over him she could exert? Thinking about it makes me icky, and angry. There are no excuses. She should have given him love and care and warmth and support, yes, if he needed them (he was in a bad familial situation) but for free. Asking for nothing in return. Then, when he was 23-24, she could have tried for the relationship, when he was sound and safe and emotionally mature, and indipendent from her. Instead she immediately got pregnant, and then again, and again. Creepy, cruel, beyond sad.

  6. Sam says:

    Sorry but I always side eye his marriage because I’ll always find it creepy that a 42 year old went after an 18 year old. And actually he was 17 when they first started talking. Gross.

  7. Shambles says:

    He veers from pretentious to woke and I can’t decide how to feel about him. I’ll say he looks good in the b&w photo, like a bearded Marlon Brando.

    The beginning of the relationship is icky as f*ck, no question. But… okay. Fine. Be happy, be in love, have babies. I’m interested to see how this goes in 20 years, when he’s mid-forties and she’s 70.

  8. als says:

    All relationships have something predatory in them to some degree. Some have a higher degree than others but they all have it.

  9. Millennial says:

    I’m sure they are in love and it works for them. But, I predict after the kids are a bit older, their relationship will change and they’ll want different things. They’ll divorce and he will have a much younger hot piece within a year. Tale as old as time, y’all.

  10. Dunne says:

    I think that given the recent details that have come to light about Ben Affleck’s alcoholism and treatment, the Affleck-Garners seem pretty functional and kind of off the table for speculation…

  11. Rachel says:

    I don’t think I will ever get behind this relationship. I don’t care how happy and in love they sound. I mean, I think it’s possible, but I also think it could be the Sunk Cost Fallacy.
    I’ve been in his shoes before. It’s not easy to admit you’ve made a mistake and cut your losses. Instead, you dig in deeper while your denial gets stronger. To admit you’ve made a mistake like this is to say you’ve wasted years of your life… your youth. It’s not something you can ever get back. And, what’s possibly more damaging, is realizing you were preyed upon.

  12. daisyfly says:

    He calls her Mamma. If that doesn’t say it all…

  13. ell says:

    he’s sort of good looking i guess, but i don’t like his voice, it sounds so whiny.

    i like sam btw, she always comes across well in interviews if it wasn’t for this. that said, i once checked his ig, and the way he present their relationship is soooooo cheesy. we all know that embarrassing couple who are super cheesy about each other on social media, and it’s them lol.

  14. perplexed says:

    I have wondered if he’ll be okay with his daughters dating 42 year olds when they’re 18.

    Honestly, I didn’t realize he had daughters until now. And then the curiosity just kind of popped into my head.

  15. Lucy2 says:

    If it works for them and their family is doing well, great. But given he was 17 when they met and he has spoken about a difficult childhood, I will always think there is something more at work here. Therapy and some life experience would have been good for him before getting into a relationship with her. Maybe it’s true love and they still would have ended up together, but it was all so rushed when he was so young.

  16. Lucy2 says:

    If it works for them and their family is doing well, great. But given he was 17 when they met and he has spoken about a difficult childhood, I will always think there is something more at work here. Therapy and some life experience would have been good for him before getting into a relationship with her. Maybe it’s true love and they still would have ended up together, but it was all so rushed when he was so young.

  17. iseepinkelefants says:

    As someone who has dated younger guys it is a bit weird (I’m 30). Not just her finding one who was so ready to be tied down (he has to rebel at some point no?), but also wanting to tie him down at a young age. I almost went out with a 19 year old once. I couldn’t go through with it. He was just too young. He was fun to talk to but we had nothing in common. No matter how much of an “old soul” someone is, they still need to experience life. I think this one may have security issues. He’s stunted somewhere for sure.

  18. Londongal; says:

    The age difference start is a bit sketchy (much as I love STW actually) but the way he effortlessly describes them is one of the most genuine comments on any actor’s marriage I’ve heard in aeons. So…… all in all, I find them gorgeous.

  19. Margo S. says:

    I’m really liking this guy more and more. Hes coming across so good in interviews.

    And I know the age difference seems odd since he was only 18 when they got together, but I don’t know. I met my now husband when I was 18 and he was 25. I’m 30 now and we have three kids and it does just works for us. Good for them!

  20. Kitten says:

    IDK…my BF is 8 years younger than me.
    Now I know that’s not as crazy as this age gap and I also know that the biggest issue here is that he was under 18 when they met…

    …but I guess I go easy on them because I never thought I’d get into a serious relationship with someone so much younger than me. Yet the connection we have is REAL–surprisingly and wonderfully real–and not at all something I planned on. Maybe I’m projecting or being too generous in my analysis of their relationship but I can’t help but wonder if it was the same for these two.
    That being said, I truly cannot imagine dating a 17 year old child. I feel both appalled and somewhat fascinated by their relationship; appalled because it does seem predatory yet fascinated because it also seems so solid and real.
    I guess only time will tell..

    • SilverUnicorn says:

      Hubby younger 13 yrs than me, being married years now. He was in his 20ies when we got married.
      However, I wouldn’t have dated someone in his teens whilst I was in my 40ies. That’s the only reason I have always side-eyed this relationship.

      I’ve seen him recently in two movies, he’s growing up well 😊

  21. Adrien says:

    People are amazed that I’m in my mid 30s. Not because I look young (I don’t) but because I have a maturity of a 20 year old person. BUT I would never ever get it on with a guy who is in his early 20s not even those “mature for his age” young men. That is just me.

  22. Marty says:

    He and his grandwife seem happy and solid. Still doesn’t change the gross circumstances under which they got together though.

  23. anonymous says:

    I am sorry but this relationship is gross period. I don’t understand adults that have love relationships with barely legal individuals. I wonder how she’ll feel if her barely legal daughter bring her a 40 yo someday.

  24. NotSoSocialButterfy says:

    Sorry, under 25 years old, the frontal cortex isn’t fully formed. There are enormous implications.

    That said, now that he is over 25, he seems committed all the same. Perhaps they are the exception, rather than the rule… but still skeeves me out…18? No, just no.

  25. Angel says:

    Live and let live…but we get to say I told you so if it goes south before his 30th birthday

  26. bogos says:

    I think this relationship is fine considering she is a creative and independent lady and he is a young attractive man born in the age of information that has youth exposed to all sorts of filth on the net. The couple also seems family oriented. No matter the age, I think the most perverse dynamics are in lopsidedly dependent romantic relationships.

  27. Veronica says:

    Their age difference is admittedly really offputting to me. If he’d at least been in his twenties, it might be a little different, but 18 is so bafflingly young to tangle with when the other partner is in their forties. Normally, I’d be touched that a man would be willing to use terms like “safe” and “secure” to describe his marriage – because men are so often discouraged from being able to express those emotions – but it just kind of plays into the uncomfortably parental element that comes from dating someone that much older.

  28. perplexed says:

    Did she get pregnant before or after marriage? Just wondering.

  29. hannah89 says:

    lets be honest: mommy issues.

  30. Julia says:

    To each his own but for sure there is a double standard. Men date much younger women all the time and people praise them for it.

    • bogos says:

      Do people really like to ignore the realities of biology this much? Men have a much longer if not unending fertility clock.

      • Veronica says:

        They really don’t. Some level of erectile dysfunction is expected at some point, and sperm quality decreases with age. The only reason women lose theirs faster is because pregnancy is hard enough on the body that it would be fatal past a certain age.

        Also, this comment is gross because women are more than breeding factories, and it still doesn’t erase the predatory elements of a much older partner going after a significantly younger and less experienced partner in their terms and early twenties.

      • bogos says:

        I agree with you that woman are more than just breeders. However, it is common for a man and a woman to be attracted and get together for biologically based reasons whether a child results or not. Many real life examples do exist such as Mick Jagger being a father again which I really doubt is from invasive and extensive medical procedures. Also as I mentioned in a comment I made previously, we are living in the age of information and the youth are exposed to a lot more filth and grossness on the net. There is not much “innocence” to lose unfortunately.

  31. Miss Melissa says:

    At 26, he is not the person he was at 18. Nor will he be at 36. And that is the problem with most marriages – with or without an age difference. You are not the same person as you go along that were when you started. Nor should you be. Age differences often emphasize that difference.

    I have no idea what goes on the between the two them, but they do seem in synch. And that is half the battle.

  32. denise says:

    What about Hugh Jackman and Deborah marriage? She is 10+ years older than he. What do you think about them?

    • Cleo says:

      Hugh Jackman was 28 and Deborah Lee-Furness was 41. Still a gap, but at he wasn’t a freaking teenager. By around 30, you learn who you are. At 18, most kids have no idea what they want to study in college, let alone if they really want to settle down with a 42 year old woman for their whole life.

    • perplexed says:

      10 years seems like nothing compared to 24 years.

      In comparison to this couple, Hugh Jackman’s age difference with his wife doesn’t look that big. Plus, they didn’t meet when he was 17. He was fully mature when he married and decided to have children with her.

  33. Robin says:

    Well, being with one’s mother tends to make one feel secure, loved, and safe, so…

  34. Zucchini says:

    The “secure, loved, safe,” is definitely a weird thing to say, but then everyone looks for different things from their relationship. I remember reading something about the filming of Nowhere Boy and crew members said these two were hanging out all the time and disappearing off together. Sorry, but they were getting on with it when he was underage. On the if he were a woman he’d be a golddigger thing, STJ is worth $100 million (from her divorce) and paid cash for their house in London, which was 20 million pounds or something.

  35. sunshine gold says:

    I am SO tired of actors doing interviews and saying they are ready to give up acting….then just do it! No one is forcing you, you don’t need the money, none of us will mind! I swear a lot of them do this as some sort of PR move so they look cool and detached or something.

  36. Emma says:

    I like this couple. No one has committed a crime here. He was 19 when they started dating and although that seems shocking, he grew up fast. We are used to 19 year old men being irresponsible and immature, but that shouldn’t be the norm. I guarantee, he pursued her and convinced her to give the relationship a shot. That she wasn’t thinking about pursuing him. We don’t know them personally or their story, but they seem like intelligent, creative, open-minded individuals who understand love to be more than an outward show of what society expects. Sam survived two separate cases of cancer and Because of that probably views life with appreciation, willing to take more risks than most.
    I’m a 40 year old highly educated professional woman who never ever thought I’d date a younger man. I’ve been told I look much younger and have a youthful spirit, so young men ask me out frequently. Since my divorce, I have dated a lot (mostly older men), but i not impressed easily nor do I feel an urgency to be with anyone. Last year I met a much younger man at a friend’s gathering and we talked for four hours into the night. We didn’t know each other’s age at the time (he’s almost 22), but we had an instant connection and comfort with each other. He ended up pursuing me and convincing me to give him a chance. We’ve been inseparable ever since and it’s been the most fulfilling, enriching, and fun relationship I’ve had. I’ve dated doctors with less emotional depth and less confidence, and successful business men who are more relationally immature. There are men who are 12 year olds in 40 year old bodies. I wasn’t looking for this, but I don’t regret giving it a chance. It’s rare, but it’s possible to find someone who is a great match, but who happens to be at a different stage in life.