It is Day 3 of Ted Cruz’s Jerkoff-gate scandal and yes, I’m still loving it. 2017 can burn to the ground, but just leave me with this: Ted Cruz got caught up in one of the funniest and stupidest controversies of the year. Late into the night on September 11th, Texas’s junior senator Ted Cruz was probably stroking it to incest p0rn. He got so excited, he “liked” the video on Twitter, and the liked tweet stayed on his official Twitter account for a few hours before it was eventually “unliked.” Cruz’s staff (heh) reported it to Twitter, like Twitter did something wrong! Ted Cruz eventually blamed the entire situation on a “staffing issue” which is still the wrong wording, peeps.
One of the reasons why this whole thing was so funny was because Cruz is very much a culture warrior who hates, in no particular order: women, abortion, gay rights, transgender rights, p0rn, sex toys, sexual agency, gay marriage, feminism and reproductive healthcare. If you’d like to read more about Cruz’s legal work to ban sex toys, please read this Mother Jones article from a few years ago. I bring up that history because it totally came up in an awkward interview between Ted Cruz and CNN’s fearless Capitol Hill reporter Dana Bash.
“Look, we had a staffer who accidentally hit the wrong button and it was a screw-up,” Cruz explained. “I will say, Twitter went crazy with it, it became trending. As soon as we found out about it, we pulled it down. And it’s generated a lot of amusement, has prompted a lot of jokes, I understand that.” Calling the incident an “honest mistake,” Cruz said his team has identified the staffer responsible but said he was not about to “throw someone under the bus” on national television by revealing their name, though he did let slip that it was a “fella.” He also would not say how or if they have been “punished” for their actions.
Then came this important question from Bash: “Can you definitively say that it was not you?”
“It was not me,” Cruz said definitively. “And it’s not going to happen again.”
Just when it seemed that Bash might move on to the tax reform discussion, she asked Cruz if he can “appreciate the irony that you once defended a Texas law banning sales of sex toys?”
Cruz pushed back on that narrative, which has been making the rounds online this week, calling the idea that he personally supported that law “totally false.” As the solicitor general for Texas, Cruz said it was his job to defend whatever laws the state passes.
“One of those laws was a law restricting the sale of sex toys, a stupid law,” he said. “Listen, I am one of the most libertarian members of the Senate. I think it is idiotic, but, it is an opportunity for knuckleheads in the media to claim, oh, isn’t this ironic that Cruz wants to ban these things?”
“I can’t believe I’m going to ask you this, but you’re officially saying Ted Cruz is OK with people buying sex toys?” Bash asked him.
“I am saying consenting adults should be able to do whatever they want in their bedrooms,” Cruz replied. “The media and the left seem obsessed with sex. Let people do what they want!”
“I am saying consenting adults should be able to do whatever they want in their bedrooms.” O RLY????? He actually does not believe consenting adults should be able to do what they want in their bedrooms – i.e. “right to privacy” – because he still has huge problems with LGBTQ rights in general, and abortion, and reproductive healthcare, and a lot more. Anyway, I would love to know what “fella” was watching p0rn from Cruz’s Twitter account late at night and why high and mighty Ted Cruz wouldn’t want to “out” that guy. Is it because TED CRUZ IS THAT FELLA?
Photos courtesy of Getty.
O RLY sir. Your actions do not match your words. That’s why people are riding you so hard
@nicole
Exactly. It’s peak hypocrisy. And we all know you are THAT FELLA Ted!!!!
Please do not evoke the image of anyone “riding” him. At least not at this hour of the morning…
LOL!
Since WHEN has he been so open minded? Hypocrite.
Is Cruz saying that he doesn’t believe all that holier-than-thou sh*t he has been trying to shove down our throats for years? It’s all an act to get votes? I’m not sure which hypocrisy is worse, but Cruz did the impossible and made me despise him even more.
No one wants to ride Ted Cruz, hard, soft, or anywhere in between.
Yeah, he WISHES we were. It’s so cliché isn’t it? The conservative politician getting caught like this?
Oh dear Ted, don’t you know lies make baby Jesus cry?
Right Wing Watch have posted multiple articles on Ted’s many (often deeply offensive) tirades about non-procreational, non-hetero, non-marital sex at events like Jerry Falwell’s “Family Values” Faux-Christian Conventions.
Idk but people caught watching inappropriate material at work tend to get fired in other offices, but this “fella” just made an honest mistake. Sure.
Yes, exactly. What a dishonest and pathetic tool.
“I am saying consenting adults should be able to do whatever they want in their bedrooms,” Cruz replied. “The media and the left seem obsessed with sex. Let people do what they want!”
This indicates to me that HE was the person who “liked” this, not some random staffer (which we all know who did it).
No. He means ‘straight, white, republican, rich men’ should be able to do whatever they want in the bedroom. He missed a few words but I fixed it for him.
I think he meant ” *ONLY* straight, white, republican, rich men”. What a hyppcritical twat.
You left out *Christian* and fertile.
Ted Cruz used to promote procreation only sex. That’s why he had a big following with the Christian Right. Caught watching porn and now he is OK with heterosexual sex for pleasure.
This.
SINCE WHEN??? Oh my god, sometimes social media is really nothing but a ray of sunshine. This is one of those occasions. The inability to understand basic Twitter functions has made Ted “Skinsuit” Cruz say that consenting adults should be able to do whatever they want in their bedrooms.
Come on, if Ted Cruz is saying something like that, it pretty much tells me that it was SO him watching and liking that p0rn!
I think something else is about to make headlines. Ted is trying to get people to soften their view of him before the next flaming bag of garbage hits the fan. Wants people to think he was “misquoted or misunderstood ” in his previous statements. He is gross
Hmmm. It’s astonishing how, when these bigoted, hypocritical globs of filth are busted showing their true colours, it’s always due to a “misunderstanding”, “misquote”, “an honest mistake”, “accidental”, “technical glitch”, “miscommunication”… It’s really a big FU to to the public, and arrogant expectation that people will swallow their lies. I guess they’ve been getting away with it, so why stop now?
Agree – posted above same thing before I read yours!
I usually don’t come here for political articles or commentary because celeb and royal gossip is so much more relaxing instead of the sh!tstorm of politics these days.Ted just makes me want to hurl for various reasons but right here-let’s call a hypocrite a hypocrite.He believes HE can do whatever HE wants in the bedroom,whatever Ted.And BTW another commenter here last year said he looks like the count on Sesame Street,now I’ll never unsee it 🤢
Yesterday and today I see Bill Murray in him (sorry Bill, don’t mean to insult you).
He makes my skin crawl (in a different way than 45 makes my skin crawl). Who knew there were so many ways to activate my gag reflex.
👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻🤢🤢🤢🤢
But Ted, fellas can’t do what they want when they’re using a computer or phone paid for by federal tax dollars.
Ted Cruz: ‘Adults should be able to do whatever they want in their bedrooms’
And by adults, I mean heterosexual men. Women can do whatever they want too, as long as it is approved by the previously mentioned man. Also, it wasn’t a staffer that “accidentally” liked this, it was me. I did it, I plan to look at porn again and I’m using this as evidence of my laid back approach to porn and people’s sexual rights as pertaining to privacy to deflect any more criticism or ridicule when I inevitably get caught again.
W
A
N
K
E
R
Never has a Britisher swearing word been such fun to type in such a literal manner. I mean that with all love and affection, Tedster.
T
O
S
S
P
O
T
That’s just an extra one for free.
Ted’s a wanking tosspot.
I love this! You all have some of the best words!
Aww, come on! It was an accident. His staff hit the button! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 🍆
Been laughing for 3 days now. Can’t. Stop.
I mean, I suppose we could go with…
O
N
A
N
I
S
T
… but I’m not sure the Tedster understands such big boy words.
The LEFT is obsessed with sex?!? Oh my god. While the right wing nut jobs continuously propose legislation to discriminate against people for having sex with members of the same gender, while they try to take rights away from gay people, while they make a big stink about whether someone’s genitals match their gender identity and try to disallow them from using a freakin bathroom, while they try to make birth control harder and harder to obtain, he sits here and says the LEFT is obsessed with sex?!
My head is going to blow off.
All of this!! He’s delusional among other things.
The amount of self-delusion/hypocrisy is off the charts!
that honestly was what made my jaw drop.
Yes, that was an odd thing to say. But he’s right about it being his job at the time to support the stupid law even though he personally thought it was stupid. You choose your battles.
Those who are obsessed with sex are the ones who usually aren’t getting any!
He’s projecting.
If the left is obsessed with sex it’s because we are constantly defending against the right’s sex oppression. If the GOP would let consenting adults do whatever they wanted in their bedroom we wouldn’t have to defend it so often.
Shame on this reporter if their very next questions didn’t jump all over that statement. He does NOT believe that.
Exactly. And I don’t believe for one minute that Ted Cruz doesn’t watch porn just like plenty of men (and women) who are part of religions that preach that sexually repressive gender nonsense.
Well, what’s the go to move of hypocrites, cheaters, and abusers? Accuse your opponent of the exact thing you’re guilty of and watch them flounder around trying to prove themselves innocent!
So OF COURSE he would say that. The grown up equivalent of kids on the playground shrieking “I know you are but what am I???” In my experience, nobody is more obsessed with sex than religious conservatives. Growing up in a secular, liberal environment, sex was a thing that was talked about, but in a matter of fact way and not actually all that often. I was horrified when I moved to a much more conservative town and (self described) “good Christians” that I barely knew seemed to think they had the right to know my sexual history. Like I should just lay it all out for them to gossip over and judge so they could feel superior to me since I wasn’t following their arbitrary rules over a thing that didn’t affect their lives in the slightest. And *I’m* the one supposed to be going to hell?! Um, okay.
MTE, it’s the go to move to deflect by accusing others of what you’ve done.
O RLY????? was my exact response to this headline. This creep has made a career out of attacking people who aren’t straight white cis Christian men. F him and the can of soup he rode in on.
Sure, Ted.
“Consenting adults should be able to do whatever they want in their bedrooms – unless it’s gay sex, then no because that’s just gross. Unless it’s two women, because that’s hot. But two men? No. Ew. No. But I mean, two consenting adults, one male and one female, or two females? Have at it. But only if you don’t use sex toys because that isn’t right. Again, unless you are two females… How else can two females get off if their isn’t some sort of penis involved? Also probably don’t do butt stuff either. Or dress up as the opposite gender. That’s not okay. Porn? Well if it’s just plain wholesome guy on girl action, or girl on girl action with two consenting adults? Sure. But nothing weird. So two women who look like nice attractive women, or a man who looks like a man and a woman who looks like a woman who both totally consent should be able to do whatever they want behind closed doors unless it’s any of the things I mentioned. Then don’t do it.”
Hahaha…that is excellent.
So he’s at the ‘it wasn’t me’ defense?? Sure Ted, alrighty then.
If Ted Cruz had it his way, he would go into our bedrooms and tell us what position are allowed by the Bible in bed. Cruz belongs in the Handmaid’s Tales as one of the high-ranking generals.
Sometimes in life, sadly, not very often, people truly do get what they deserve.
And it’s Dana Bash for the win!
The situation is pretty funny regardless of how it actually happened.
Now, I’d never vote for Ted Cruz, but I remember when for one brief shining moment he had the courage to stand up at the Republican Convention in front of a room full of rabid Trumpians and tell people to vote their conscience and as diplomatically as possible – don’t vote for Trump, vote for the rest of the Republicans down the line. The crowd was so threatening that seciurity had to escort his wife out. He refused to endorse Trump and the crowd kept getting uglier.
Alas, he later endorsed Trump, but for that brief shining moment – he showed real courage. He knew what a disaster Trump was from personal experience, Trump was going after not only himself but also his wife and father with his hateful lies and insults.
The LEFT is obsessed with sex?!?! It’s the right that keeps trying to regulate it, even in the privacy of our own bedrooms.
He should have asked Josh Duggar for advice first. Until the AM hack, ole Joshie boy might have never been outed and happily watching and playing with porn stars to this day.
Thing is, don’t most of these politicians not run their own social media accounts? I know the Idiot in Chief does, but that’s painfully obvious. I don’t have any experience with Cruz’s account, but it was my understanding that staffers mainly were responsible for what is posted by official accounts. Things are vetted and proofread and “how does this look” is considered by more than one person before anything is liked or posted.
HOWEVER, the way he’s ducking and dodging and refusing to name names or go into any detail whatsoever really does make it look like it was totally him. Or at least someone close enough to him that it’d be just as embarrassing and scandalous as if it were him.
Yeah, it’s him, for sure. Ted Cruz would have fired someone else for doing this in a hot minute. And he would have been very public about it, to save his own skin. He is lying (again).
It is so obvious it is himself. Otherwise, to save face, he would’ve fired the “fella” staffer who he claims is responsible. He had no problem firing a campaign manager over a Marco Rubio “bible video”. Yet a staffer searching for p0rn on Ted’s private Twitter account & becoming public isn’t a fireable offense?? Sure Ted!
http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2016/02/22/cruz-fires-top-campaign-spokesman-over-rubio-bible-video.html
Everyone knows it is him.
You nailed it. If it really were someone else, they’d be toast by now.
Why is he being called out on this and the one in charge does whatever he wants? I am all for TC going down, but others need to go away too. This teflon coating on the big guy is insane and makes zero sense.
“The state has no place in the bedrooms of the nation.” Pierre Elliott Trudeau, 1967, statement about decriminalizing homosexuality in Canada.
Now, in 2017, Ted Cruz releases a similar statement regarding not banning sex toys, after liking an incest porn tweet.
Progress, you tricsky devil, you; speaking out of the mouths of the culturally degenerate as though you were real.
Dear Ted,
You do realize that the names, job titles, and salaries of Senate staffers are public record right? Since you’ve helpfully ruled out all the lil’ ladies on your team, it won’t take much for an enterprising reporter to narrow the field of fellas to half a dozen or so. Are you confident said fellas would be willing to take the fall if someone from the Washington Post or Politico asks them point blank? How many of them are more loyal to you than they are to their future career prospects?
Sincerely,
We’re Not As Dumb As You Think
I was almost winded by the amount of sheer irony in everything he said.
God, Ted, everyone already thought you were the biggest loser.
Also, why would he support a dildo ban when he is one?
Some reporter will break the news by next week that it was Ted. He will confess to being a sinner, ask for Jesus to forgive him then a month later return to being even more religious.
How can he know it won’t happen again if it wasn’t him?
Oh I’M obsessed with sex? Nah, just obsessed with hilarious hypocrisy lmao
“While Cruz was solicitor general in Texas, his office defended a state ban on sex toy sales, and his office wrote a legal brief arguing that people don’t have the legal right to masturbate.
‘There is no substantive-due-process right to stimulate one’s genitals for non-medical purposes unrelated to procreation or outside of an interpersonal relationship,’ the brief said.”
https://thinkprogress.org/before-twitter-porn-controversy-ted-cruz-didnt-think-masturbating-was-a-laughing-matter-93cda77e199a/
From Green Eggs and Ham to porn… wow he’s really grown.
Says the ANTI-LGBTQIA Ted Cruz!! Effing hypocrite.