I’ve never thought “why is Chris Evans with Jenny Slate?” should be a question about their separate attractiveness levels. On a superficial level, he’s the good-looking guy next door and she’s the attractive girl-next-door type too. But people lost their minds over the idea that Captain America would end with a girlfriend who wasn’t, like, a supermodel. To me, the better question is “why is Chris Evans with Jenny Slate when she seems like such a neurotic mess, and she was married at the time?” The answer could be that Chris is just as much of a neurotic mess and he and Jenny are pretty similar in their self-described “dorkiness.” Chris did an interview with the Thirst Aid Kit podcast (you can hear it here) and he talked about whether he thinks he’s hot, and how inside his Captain America buff body, he’s just a dork. Some highlights:
When asked “when did you realize you were hot?”: “Oh, man! Goodness…I still feel like I’m just trying to pull a fast one over on people. You don’t know what I look like first thing in the morning! It’s rough!…If you look back on some of my photos from childhood, it was not kind. I had a really bumpy road, and I think like most of us, we still feel like that—no matter what. No matter what happens, we kind of connect to that chapter in life when you first start exploring the feelings of comparison. It’s usually connected to when you start noticing the people you’re attracted to—somewhere around 9, 10, 11—when you first start coming into your own sexuality and start seeing how you stack up. That was probably one of the roughest chapters of my life! And so I think—for most people—you kind of stay in that suspended state.”
He was always typecast as the all-American jock though: “I guess when I got to Hollywood, and you start going on certain auditions, you’re like, ‘All right. Typically I’m playing a guy in a letterman jacket. I guess I fit a certain character type. But like I said, that is not how I feel on the inside. I’m a pretty big dork. God, everybody says they’re a dork! That’s a stupid thing to say; I shouldn’t have said it. But I really do have dorky tendencies. So, I don’t know. I suppose right when I started auditioning and you see the pattern of things you’re going out for, you go, ‘All right, I guess this is the role I fit into.'”
He’s pro-beard: “I really like it, too; I usually live my life with a beard. I’m not a huge fan of shaving and it provides a little bit of anonymity at times.. I think I can get a pretty full beard in a month—three to four weeks… I’ve had multiple people try to push some sort of beard oil on me. Who is lubing up their beard? That’s just gross to me. No, it really is no grooming. You comb it in the morning so you don’t have that behead look. There’s really not much grooming to it.”
He’s looking forward to the end of his Marvel contract: “It sounds so awful to say it, but, you know, I’m 36. We started these movies, what, eight years ago? Nine years ago? Something like that. So, over the years, your body goes into a little bit of wear and tear, not only to get in shape for the film, but then the actual filming. It’s a lot of stunt work. You get banged up and you never want to completely fall off. When you wrap the film—even though you stop going to the gym—in less than six or seven months, you’re going to be starting another film. So, you always have to keep some sort of a foundation. I really wouldn’t mind just…not quitting the gym completely, but adjusting my workout to fit a 36-year-old body and not try to carry around so much size. Be more functional, I suppose.”
My instinct was to roll my eyes at the traditionally handsome white guy who doesn’t understand that he’s hot. But I actually halfway believe it in Chris’s case. I think he really does have that kind of stunted, stuck-in-middle-school view of himself. I think Jenny Slate does too, which brings me back to the point I was making in the opening: maybe Slate and Evans are sort of meant for each other. He is her “dream seventh grade boyfriend” and he’s stuck in the seventh-grade frame of mind. It works.
Photos courtesy of Backgrid and Getty.
Well some supposed to die in Infinity War , did Chris just spill the beans that he’s one of them.
Also, Not Another Teen Movie is still one of my favorite jock movies.
No. It is rather well known that contracts are up for a bunch of them and MCU plans to phase out some of the characters for a while and focus on new ones like Captain Marvel, Ant Man, Doctor Strange and Black Panther. In the comics, some of the other characters step into the Captain America role and they might be planning for that to happen. Evans, Hemsworth, Hiddleston and possibly Renner and Johanson are at the end of their contracts. Sebastian Stan and Anthony Mackie were originally signed to 9 films each so the plan may be for one of them to step into the Captain America role.
Yes I know that but someone is supposed to die. And remember that’s how Bucky became Cap in the comic books . Steve died and Bucky took over.
@ Lightpurple:
My love, after Black Panther comes out Evans can go have all the existential crisis he wants.
I for one won’t give a damn.
On a purely superficial level, I think he’s far more attractive. She was really good on the Kroll show and no doubt has a better sense of humour than him, and seems more intellectual.
Eh, while I don’t think she’s stupid, I’m not sure I’d describe her as intellectual. I know what you mean about their looks. She is not unattractive but he is more conventionally good looking, I think.
Intellectual?? lmao She has an unhealthy obsession with defecating, it’s all over her twitter, with the most recent ‘gem’ being in January. She can’t form a coherent tweet even after they increased the character limit to 280. Also, I can bet there’s a valid reason why she does her standup only sporadically and doesn’t allow to record it. I’ve seen a few short bits and it might be considered funny if you’re high. Or a teenager. Fun fact – she has a standup show today at a university and they can’t seem to sell $5 tickets. Wonder why?
He’s one of the few people I believe when they say they still feel like that dorky looking 10 year old. He’s always been pretty open about his insecurities and anxiety, so I could see him being someone who experiences imposter syndrome.
Even though I am pretty sure he’s going to make his exit as Cap in one of the Infinity War movies, I’m not ready. He is one of my favorite characters and Marvel has done a good job with him – Winter Soldier is one of my favorite installments (soon to be replaced by Black Panther, I have a feeling) and it showed he has some honest to goodness acting chops.
Of course, the most important part of this article is that luscious beard he gets to wear in the next movie-if Cap is making an exit, at least he gets to do it at peak hotness.
The guys in my house love the Captain America character while I can’t stand him lol. He reminds me of the male version of Mary Poppins… practically perfect in every way. Ugh. So any actor playing him receives my indignation. Imma Thor and Hulk gal. Totally fine with Dr. Strange, and others, to step in. Just keep Asgard and Valhalla, along with the other worlds and realms, around please. Can never have enough Norse mythology. 😋
From your comment (and I may be wrong) but it seems you may not have seen Thor:Ragnarok yet. So I won’t spoil it for you. 🙂
I only have love for Cap. Cap punches Nazis. If there’s anything we need more of these days, it’s Nazi punching. (Mona Lisa Saperstein is also a national treasure, by the way, so I’m cool with them both)
to be fair – they both seem like such a neurotic mess. she is not the only spaz in this scenario.
haha agreed
I think they are both equally spazzy
She’s a pretty vile mean girl, while chris is genuine and nice.
Well I might be an outlier but I don’t think he’s hot. Handsome and in top shape, yes. But not “makes you sweat and heave” hot like Jason Mamoa or Idris. Whatever.
When I saw this comment all I could think was “And who could possibly top those two in that category!” What would happen if they were in the same room at the same time? I’d pass out.
In the same room at the same time? I’d hyperventilate. Collapse. And probably get pregnant just by looking at them
I do not think he is attractive in anyway. Especially with the beard and I’m not against beards at all, in fact Mr. M is growing one now. His face is just so plain, forgettable, just there, blah, to me. I honestly don’t understand how so many think he’s hot, there are soooo many much more attractive men to choose from in Hollywood.
I have a theory that everyone is dorky and awkward as a teen — trust me, I teach middle school — and Hollywood actors just somehow latch onto the phase as a large part of their identity while most of us move on from that feeling. Like it’s a safety mechanism in their current magazine cover model status. Even the two of three somewhat suave and attractive teens feel dorky… you just never meet anyone who says they were cool in high school.
There’s just something irreconcilable about the cognitive dissonance of having a roomful of the most beautiful and admired people in the country all claiming they were the biggest dorks in their school.
This! I was thinking the same thing. A lot of us was a dorky insecure mess in junior/senior high school, but we move on. Why would you hold onto it? I was a four eyed, Jheri Curl, Olive Oyl, insecure mess but I am nowhere near who I was as a teenager, nor would I want to be. This I still feel 13-14 yrs old at 36 seems…..I don’t know…..like a story you tell people instead of dealing with your issues and move on. I could be wrong but it just seems off. I get adult anxiety and being an introvert but I still feel 13? Shrugs.
Middle school is kind of an awkward time. What’s weird is that the people who weren’t that good-looking were the most cocky (and the meanest) while the actual good-looking people kind of minded their own business. I remember high school being the same way.
I don’t find him to be all that attractive and I admire that she doesn’t feel the need to get a nose job or other such enhancements which in the end, only make people look worse.
I totally believe him. I saw him the other day along with Michael Cera and the other actor in their new play. I guess they were taking a lunch break. I was sitting in the deli eating looking out the floor to ceiling windows and they were walking by. A fan stopped them. While the other two ended up cracking jokes and giving daps to the guy, Chris was a bit standoffish. Not in a conceited way, but in a very shy awkward way. Like a kid in a cool new environment so he can’t help but peek from his mother’s skirt but needs time to come out. Like he kept his hands in his pockets, head down but was looking up through his lashes and was definitely paying attention to the convo. They stopped with this guy for about 5 mins. He never seemed in a rush just super shy and awkward.
As a big fan of his I feel like this is such an accurate story based on my impression of him. He really does seem shy and clingy to his mom and what he knows. He tells a pretty hilarious story about refusing to go to camp as a kid and having to always be in his sisters group. He can obviously participate in the adult professional world and has found success in Hollywood. I don’t think he’s like debilitated by it, but I think deep down he is a little shy and panicky. He’s one of the few celebs I believe when they say they struggle with fame. I don’t know much about her but if they’re both neurotic and panicky then maybe a good match? Maybe a terrible match lol.
Not debilitated but he definitely needs warm up time. I think he comes off as more self assured in interviews because he has time to mentally prepare but if he finds himself suddenly in a social setting he is going to panic a bit before he acclimates.
They both come off as self-involved, exhaustingly over-analytical, and faux intellectual. So, a good match.
Chris has his issues sure but she’s a mess. She’s very narcissistic and has been accused of lying by her dad. She claimed she’s like him but was revealed to be popular in HS and did more bullying than being bullied. She is awkward and not attractive and if he thinks he’s like that too then maybe he can relate. But overall I think she’s using him for his fame and they aren’t really that similar deep down. She has said very abusive things while he seems too he genuinely nice.
Here’s hoping then that he gets his life in order and her out of it.
All the gossip articles about them have quieted down recently and this is the first time they’re mentioned in one publication in more than a month, while last fall there was something coming out about the supposed ‘lovebirds’ almost every week. So for all it’s worth I have a feeling they’re already done. Let’s just hope that this time it’s for good, no comebacks.