In the past seven days, Donald Trump launched an authorized and poorly-planned war against Iran, accidentally killed the next Iranians in line to be ayatollah, refused to make plans to evacuate Americans or American embassies in the region, caused a huge spike in crude oil prices, threatened that Cuba is next on his invasion agenda, demanded that he be part of Iran’s process to elect the next ayatollah, threatened Spain because they wouldn’t let him use their military bases, and finally, mocked Keir Starmer and the British government. It’s been insanity from start to finish and I’m leaving off like twenty major events that happened in the past week. Well, one of Trump’s few constants is his love of shiny objects and royalty. As such, the Brits are desperate to “use” the Windsors to repair the US-UK “special relationship.” Some highlights from the Telegraph:

The Trump Whisperers: The Royal family has acquired a nickname in diplomatic circles: the Trump whisperers. The last state visit – and those that preceded it – was so successful that there is a theory Donald Trump would prefer to deal with the Windsors over any British politician. For that reason, they are to be deployed again – in the nick of time – with the war on Iran having seemingly stretched the so-called special relationship to breaking point. Politically, it is close to an emergency.

Why Trump is mad at Starmer: Despite No 10’s eventual decision to allow the US to use RAF bases for “limited defensive” strikes on Iran, the White House remains furious that Mr Trump’s request was initially refused. Diplomats in Washington have since scrambled to resolve the situation, but the UK’s decision to replace Lord Mandelson as the US ambassador has hampered their efforts.

King Charles’s state visit to the US in April: The King and Queen are already pencilled in to visit America at the end of April. The trip has not yet been confirmed, palace sources emphasise, and is a “matter for government”. Nevertheless, it is expected to go ahead. It will be tied to the 250th anniversary of American independence, with the King following in his late mother’s footsteps. Officials in Washington are hoping that another state visit – following the King’s hosting duties in Windsor last year – will smooth transatlantic tensions, which had been bubbling under the surface for months. The special relationship now is at an “all-time low”, one source familiar with negotiations over the potential visit admitted. “The royal visit can’t come quickly enough,” they said. “If they could bring it forward, they would,” a government source said. “There is no other way” to reset the UK-US relationship, warns another.

The other royal trip to the US: The Prince and Princess of Wales could make a second royal trip in July. It would be a blockbuster event. The Princess has not travelled overseas in an official capacity since before her illness, and the White House is understood to be very keen for them to visit. Sources point to the example of the famous “John Travolta moment” in 1985 in which Diana, then Princess of Wales, danced with the actor at the White House. Should her son and his wife stage a photocall of similar impact, it would represent a coup for their potential hosts. The president requested to sit next to Catherine at the Windsor Castle state banquet, it is said. He was “bowled over” by the hospitality, leaving full of ideas for the White House décor and asking for details about the golden carriages the Royal family has at their disposal for such diplomatic duties. “He wants to be as royal as the royals,” says one critic.

Keen royal statesmanship: There is a view to the future behind the potential visit, too, with the Prince and Princess of Wales being the monarchy’s next generation. “It’s not just about the glitz and glamour,” says a source. “It’s about building a deep, enduring relationship [with the US] that will last for decades.” That relationship, the source added, helps British governments through difficult patches. Which is another reason, supporters of the Royal family would say, not to pursue the idea of stripping back the pomp and ceremony of monarchy to resemble the style of the European “bicycling royals”.

[From The Telegraph]

My political/royal analysis is that the Starmer government is playing this the wrong way. Starmer knows that Trump only really gives a sh-t about the optics and the royals. Use the threat of “maybe we’ll cancel Charles’s visit” or “maybe William and Kate will be unavailable after all” to get what they need out of Trump and get Trump to change his tune. If Starmer doesn’t know by now that Trump is a blustering buffoon with profound dementia, then what’s the point of any of this? I’d also like to point out that there’s an undercover acknowledgement that Trump would be less than thrilled if William came to the US solo, without his wife. As in, no one would actually pay attention to William’s visit if he didn’t bring Kate.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Cover Images.