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This week’s Star Magazine has a really amusing article from ex Star employee and weepy wronged Jon Gosselin ex, Kate Major. Major and her new fiance, abusive creep Michael Lohan, pose in a creepy engagement portrait, Michael’s wild eyes searing the camera as if to say “Look, here’s another woman who will have me,” (until I sell her out to the press for a minor perceived wrong.) Kate is blissfully unaware, and judging from an interview I’ve seen with her and her glassy-eyed look I think she gets through her days with help from liquid courage. She tells Star about her wedding plans, as if we care about the details. Kate has already revealed that she plans to have the wedding in the fall and that she wants to have Lohan’s babies. You know that Michael will be trying to sell the wedding and baby photos no matter whether he’s still talking to Kate or not.
The former Star reporter dished about the duo’s plans for their nuptials, which will likely take place in November at Long Island, N.Y.’s Oheka Castle, where Kevin Jonas recently wed.
And it looks like it’s going to be a lavish affair. “I come from a big family, and so does Michael, so it will probably be a very big,” says Kate, 27. “And my dad will walk me down the aisle. He’s so happy that I’m happy, and he gets along great with Michael.”
While Kate is already thinking about her perfect gown – Vera Wang tops her list of designers – she insists she’s no bridezilla. “I guess I’ll have to buy some wedding magazines and start looking now!” she says. “I’m not really girly, so as long as the dress looks good and fits, I’m okay. Something strapless, probably. Nothing froufrou.” Her eight bridesmaids will have gowns that are similarly unfussy. “I’m thinking plum or navy dresses, but that could change at any moment.”
Kate adds that Michael, 50, would love for Lindsay to be a bridesmaid. But she doesn’t know if the star, who has expressed disapproval of the pair, will show up. “I hope that for the sake of her father’s happiness, Lindsay will be in attendance,” says Kate, adding that Michael’s three other kids with ex-wife Dina are invited to be in the wedding party too. “We just want all the people who care about us to be there and have a good time.”
[From Star Magazine, print edition, April 26, 2010]
Previously Lindsay said that her father’s engagement made her want to puke, so you can imagine that she might not show up to his actual wedding. Michael will of course try and convince her to come, so that he can sell the exclusive rights to the photos to whichever tabloid will pony up the money. Maybe Lindsay will show up, her pupils tiny pinpricks and a look on her face like she’s about to pass gas, which is how she’s looked for months. Seeing this engagement photo I’m struck by how similar Kate Major and Lindsay look. We’ll already heard that Michael likes strippers that look like Lindsay. Now that Lindsay’s gone off the rails, is it a coincidence that Michael’s girlfriend looks all puffy and drunk too?
Written by Celebitchy
Posted in Kate Major, Lindsay Lohan, Michael Lohan, Weddings
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Ewww!! Make these two vapid greasebags go away!
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If your fiance is wearing a wife beater in your engagement picture, don’t say later there were no signs. Cuz that’s a big, flashing, neon sign that says “he will knock some of your teeth out.”
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Gross!!
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Ew
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OMG, I can’t believe he’s wearing a wifebeater in his “engagement photo”!!! Wow, he really is total trash.
Now Dina needs to hook up with Jon Gosselin, and the whole douche-tastic picture will be complete.
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I can’t decide which one is the least attractive…
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Yeah, the wifebeater tank is an extra classy touch.
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oh my god this is the most disgusting thing I’ve seen… since yesterday actually, which was those twitter pics of Michael Lohan. His antics ALMOST excuse Lindsay’s addictions and behavior. I’m happy she at least has enough sense to distance herself from this mess most of the time.
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Ha! She looks constipated in this photo.
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She looks extra fat in her engagement photo – eeewwwwww! She even has fat arms! And the wifebeater is a nice way to remind people of his prison record. Classy!! These people are disgusting and I think I’m gonna be sick.
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OMG…why does he think he looks hawt in a wife beater?…and for an engagement picture? *shivers* He is sooo creepy!
…and Kate needs to learn the way to pose so that it hides the double chin. Not a flattering photo to say the least. lol.
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best engagement announcement ever.
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At the very least they should have photoshopped it.
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I feel like printing this photo out, and every time my own life gets me down a little, I’ll just look at that and feel better about myself.
LOL e – I think if your fiance is Michael Lohan, don’t say there weren’t warning signs!
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This gave me heartburn.
Why do they look like they smell like outside combined with wet puppy and a hit of corn liquor?
Filthy McNasty…
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Kate Major always looks a little…off.
But actually I think these two are perfect for each other, each equally kniving.
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Honestly, there are no words to describe this. . .
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Yuck, yuck, yuck. What a creep.
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Just GO….A….WAY already!
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Hey, y’all should be glad he’s not wearing that god-awful mesh shirt, all “Here’s my waxed chest and man-nipples, ladies. You know you want it.”
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@e. Best. Comment.Ever!!!!!!!!!!
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Wouldn’t November conflict with her due date? I still think the hiefer’s pregnant.
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OMG! Cupid must be doing his job right because there couldn’t be two people more perfect for eachother! WOWZERS!
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Does two r a joke!
That picutre it’s sooo funny! He is thinking he is some kind of Fabio e she looks to be almost laughing at everything.
I really thing she is doing some kind of revange on Lindsay for something that she did. And abou Michael, he is crazy and a really dangerous psycopath
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I’m throwing up in my mouth as I type this.
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Wow. THis pic just needs a big sign pointing to the couple saying JUDGE THIS HATERZ!
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Clearly a match made in heaven
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OMG!!! This isn’t for real, right!? Losing.. faith… in humanity…
And LOL @ e., that’s the funniest thing I’ve read all day!!!
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Oh my sweet lord Jeebus, I cannot stop laughing at that header pic!!! XD
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I hope she’s not pregnant, the last thing the world needs is another Lohan!
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Oh, this whole situation has turned out rather funny hasn’t it? So much irony, backstabbing, famewhoring…where do you start?
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Someone in Hollywack hates Lindsay. Lawd.
Those two are up to something other than marriage. You can bet that.
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