Courtenay Semel – the woman who supposedly was Lindsay Lohan’s first lesbian love – is easily the ugliest creature I have ever seen. Dlisted had a side-by-side image of her next to the Grinch, and the resemblance is uncanny. Even funnier is that several British tabloids referred to her as “stunning” last week. I’m assuming “stunning” is actually British slang for “looks like she got beat up with a bat.” I mean there’s ugly where you sort of feel badly for the person, and then there’s the sort of ugly where you’re actually mad at the person for existing, and shoving their ugly in your face. Courtenay is that kind of ugly.

Semel is now dating Tila Tequila. Always a good idea. Courtenay is also apparently pretty mad that she has a mouth that looks like she’s storing a giftbox. That’s the only reason I can guess why she’s act like a complete lunatic and end up getting her ugly ass arrested on Tuesday night.

COURTENAY Semel, the wild-child lesbian daughter of former Yahoo chief Terry Semel, went on a tear Tuesday night in Las Vegas and ended up spending the night in jail. Semel showed up in the party town without new girlfriend Tila Tequila and started the night at Sushi Samba in the Palazzo with Kourtney Kardashian. “They were filming their dinner for ‘Keeping Up With the Kardashians’ ” our spy said. Later, Kardashian called it a night and Semel went out to Pure at Caesars with Vegas showman Jeff Beacher – and proceeded to “go nuts,” a spy said. “Courtenay got so drunk she was falling down. Security asked her to leave, but she refused.” Semel finally left, but on her way out there was an altercation with a security guard. “She was arrested and spent the night in jail,” a Semel pal confirmed. “And she lost her phone.” Calls to Semel weren’t returned. Vegas police said, “We can’t confirm at this time.”

[From Page Six]

Here’s Courtenay at the Palazzo Hotel’s Sushi Samba Sugarcane Boutique Club in Vegas on Tuesday. Sorry. I’ve got to attach photos, and as much as I’d like to give you something less stomach-churning to look at, it just seemed weird to put up a picture of a rainbow or spaghetti cat or something. Header of Semel with Tila Tequila at the Apple Lounge Grand Opening in West Hollywood on August 14th. Images thanks to WENN.

Considering it’s pretty much the best sitcom on television right now, it’s kind of surprising – in a good way – that The Office hasn’t had to deal with any major scandals. Well, until now. Cast member Craig Robinson was arrested on June 29th for possession of ecstasy and meth. He was originally pulled over for some sort of traffic violation during which officers found the drugs.

We know what the topic of conversation around the water cooler is going to be next week. Craig Robinson, who in addition to his current role as a hit man in Pineapple Express is best known as Darryl, the warehouse foreman and Kelly’s nonchalant suitor on The Office, is facing felony drug charges stemming from an arrest during a June traffic stop.

According to the criminal complaint released Friday by the Los Angeles District Attorney’s Office, the 36-year-old actor was charged with two counts of possession of a controlled substance and one count of being under the influence of a controlled substance. In this case, that last “substance” allegedly included amphetamines, cocaine and cannabinoids—or any of the chemicals found in cannabis.

Robinson, whose credits also include Arrested Development , Curb Your Enthusiasm and Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story, was busted June 29 in Culver City, Calif., after officers pulled him over for a traffic violation and found drugs in the car, authorities said. Arraignment has been set for Aug. 21. Robinson’s rep had no comment on the matter.

[From E! News]

This story bums me out. I naively like to assume that everyone on The Office is as wholesome and odd as they appear on the show. Perhaps it’s because several of the supporting characters have the same name as the actors who play them. Or that many of the actors have MySpace pages and blogs (that it seems like they actually write) that are half them and half their characters. It really blurs the line, which I enjoy. It lets me believe Pam and Jim really are out there exchanging funny looks all day long. And now it’s kind of blown. It’s just not the same thinking the guys in the warehouse are actually doing speed.

Although it does make me think of this clip from the Drug Testing episode. Header image of Craig Robinson at the Road to a Cure Gala this past November. Images thanks to PR Photos.

It must be really frustrating to star in a movie that’s universally raved about, and then not get any other offers aside from a couple of Lifetime movies. That’s the only explanation I can come up with for Hairspray star Nikki Blonsky’s unmitigated rage. Nikki and her father Carl were involved in some kind of serious physical altercation yesterday at the airport in Turks and Caicos. The two took on former America’s Next Top Model contestant Bianca Golden and her mother Elain – who was so seriously injured that she had to be airlifted to a Florida hospital!

“They were involved in an altercation at the airport in the departure lounge,” Sgt. Chase of the Turks and Caicos Islands Police Department tells E! News, adding that the fight was over some saved seats.

Blonsky’s rep declined to comment. The 19-year-old Hairspray star was charged with assault and actual bodily harm as well as common assault; her father, Carl, was rung up on a count of inflicting grievous bodily harm. Bianca Golden was also charged with actual bodily harm and assault. Golden’s mother, Elain, was hurt so badly she had to be airlifted to a hospital in Florida, according to Sgt. Chase.

Nikki Blonsky appeared in court this morning sporting a neck brace–”she received some kind of injury,” said Chase; a judge allowed her to be released on $6,000 cash bail and ordered to return to court on Dec. 1. Her father is being held until Aug. 8. Golden was also freed on bail. According to Chase, Golden and Nikki Blonsky’s charges carry a maximum penalty of two years, while Carl Blonsky could face up to five years in prison.

[From OK! Magazine]

Holy cow. This whole thing just reeks of Tracy Turnblad fighting for justice. Except I think Blonsky forgot Tracy’s message of not beating the crap out of people. Who knew the pint-sized girl packed such rage? I know traveling and airports can piss people off and make otherwise rational people do very irrational things… but this is pretty damn extreme. It resulted in airlifting someone off the island. And neck braces. And lots of criminal charges. I’m really anxious to hear a more gossipy account of what went on.

Bianca Golden is shown at the First Annual Fiercee Awards to Honor the Women of ‘America’s Next Top Model’ on 3/28/08. Credit: PNP/WENN. Nikki Blonski is shown at the Bravo A List Awards at Hammerstein Ballroom on 6/4/08. Credit: WENN

Anne Hathaway really got herself into some pretty big problems with ex-boyfriend Raffaello Follieri. The real estate investor (more accurately referred to as a con man) is still languishing in jail, unable to afford his $21 million bail. Hathaway has cut all ties with him, but the Daily News just revealed that the FBI has seized Anne’s private diaries as evidence in their case against Follieri.

Anne Hathaway could be drawn deeper into the fraud scandal of her ex-boyfriend, Raffaello Follieri, now that FBI agents have seized the actress’ private journals, sources tell us.

The agents confiscated the intimate diaries of the “Devil Wears Prada” star during another raid on Follieri’s $37,500-a-month Trump Tower pad, according to the sources. Seeking to bolster their case against the dashing Italian, who has been charged with 11 counts of fraud and money laundering, agents are also said to have seized photos of Follieri with Bill and Hillary Clinton, Pope John Paul II, and John and Cindy McCain. Also confiscated were documents, watches, a Tiffany clock, an antique Bible and personal photos of Follieri and Hathaway.

Hathaway, who has been charged with no crime, has cut off all contact with the 30-year-old Follieri, say sources. While Follieri recently had associates return to Hathaway a $250,000 abstract painting that had hung in his pad, “she’s changed her numbers so he can’t reach her,” says a friend. “Raffaello has been trying to call her all the time.”

According to friends, he still wonders whether Hathaway, 25, helped put him behind bars. “He was in Europe, working on a deal,” says a source. “He didn’t have to come back to New York. He knew he was being investigated. But she kept calling him, saying they needed to resolve their future. A few days after his return, he was arrested.”

[From the New York Daily News]

Follieri’s friends say that he’s, “doing very badly,” and being abused in jail. It’s hard to tell if it’s anything unusual or just the run-of-the-mill stuff that’s bound to happen in prison. It certainly isn’t Trump Tower. I’d guess that a lot of things might feel like abuse to Follieri in comparison to the life he was living.

Most stories seem to hint strongly at the likelihood that Anne Hathaway cooperated with the FBI. Frankly I don’t find that as horrendous as most people seem to. The man is accused of committed hundreds of millions of dollars worth of fraud. She was dumb to have stayed with him so long, but frankly I don’t think loyalty to your boyfriend requires breaking the law and lying for him. It’ll be pretty interesting to hear what those diaries contain.

Here’s Anne with Kate Hudson on the set of their upcoming new movie ‘Bride Wars’ in Manhattan on May 28th. Photographer: Patricia Schlein. Images thanks to WENN.

Khloe Kardashian. Just the name makes me want to sucker punch someone in the face. Yeah, I’m that kind of girl. Or at least I’m in that kind of mood. I understand that Kim, Kourtney, and Khloe’s mom Kim likes Ks. Great. Awesome for you. But she managed to give Kim a normal K name, instead of finding some dumbass way to spell an otherwise good C name. Is it any wonder Kim is the only “successful” Kardashian daughter? Khloe’s racking in the DUI’s, Kourtney is… well I don’t know what the hell she’s doing, but that’s my point. I blame this whole debacle on their mom.

Because her name sucks, Khloe sucks, so Khloe got a DUI. She was ordered to serve 30 days in jail [People originally erroneously reported that it was 3 days – which we repeated here], which of course in Los Angeles translates to several minutes. Khloe was in and out in under three hours – not exactly record time, but you could see how they wouldn’t be as worried about her as they were with someone like Nicole Richie or Lindsay Lohan.

With the jails too full of more serious offenders to find room for her, Khloe Kardashian served less than three hours of her 30-day sentence on Friday in a DUI case. Kardashian, 24, who appears on E!’s Keeping Up With the Kardashians, was processed into the Lynwood, Calif., jail for women at 10:36 a.m. and released at 1:29 p.m., according to the Los Angeles Sheriff’s Department.

The department, which runs the city’s jails, has an early-release policy for nonviolent offenders due to overcrowding. Kim Kardashian’s younger sister was sent there after she surrendered to the Van Nuys courthouse and was booked at 8:52 a.m. The Lynwood jail is the same facility that housed Paris Hilton for most of her term in an alcohol-related driving case.

Kardashian served her brief time for violating probation following a DUI arrest. Kardashian was arrested for DUI in March 2007, and was sentenced to three years probation. On July 3, she was sentenced to 30 days in jail after failing to complete roadside cleanup duty and enroll in an alcohol education class.

[From People]

I understand that DUIs are generally considered nonviolent crimes. I can see why women sentenced for them don’t put in as much time as murderers. But I think it sends a really bad message. Khloe Kardashian knew that she could do something she didn’t want to do – roadside cleanup duty – or she could go to jail for three hours. It makes sense she chose jail instead of doing her time properly.

Starlets know they won’t have to pay any real consequences. Part of her sentence was to do something she didn’t like – and do it for a while. Probably in the sun. Photographers would probably show up. It would be embarrassing. Why should someone as grand as Khloe Kardashian stoop to that level? Going to jail was much easier and more dignified for her. Of course we’d be talking about a whole different story if she knew she had to serve 30 entire days. Then we’d have some great pics of Khloe dragging a bag around a freeway.

Considering her choices, I no longer feel badly calling Khloe the behemoth monstrosity that she is.

Here’s Khloe outside the Villa Lounge in Los Angeles on Tuesday. Images thanks to WENN.

“Actor” and “comedian” (I use both those terms really, really loosely here) Andy Dick has got to have one of the longest, most bizarre rap sheets in all of Hollywood. The Q-list actor was once arrested for mooning people at a McDonald’s; has exposed himself at a Canadian comedy club (to be fair, so have I); was forcibly removed from Jimmy Kimmel Live after he repeatedly groped Ivanka Trump… the list goes on. And those are just a few of the non-drug offenses. I can’t even begin to give the highlights from that section of Dick’s rap sheet.

Now Dick has a few new charges to add to his ever-growing attorney’s fees. And a picture that makes him look just like Sideshow Bob.

Wacked out crazy comedian Andy Dick was arrested early this morning in Murrieta, Calif. on suspicion of drug possession and sexual battery.

Cops busted the 42-year-old Dick just before 2 AM this morning in the parking lot near a Buffalo Wild Wings restaurant. Dick is still being held, his bail set at $5,000.

Around 1:15 AM this morning cops tell us they responded to a report of a person peeing in the parking lot outside the wing joint, causing a disturbance.

Once there, they stopped a van and found Dick in the passenger seat. He was arrested for allegedly groping a 17-year-old girl’s breasts and pulling her top down.

When he was searched, cops say they found weed and one Xanax in his front pants pocket.

[From TMZ]

I’m pretty sure it’s safe to say that Andy Dick is the sleaziest guy in Hollywood. True, you don’t hear about him as much, so there are definitely guys out there that whose reputations are better known. But when you go through the list – and see how many of his incidents are sexual in nature – it sure makes the guy look pretty damn disgusting. From what I can tell, he hasn’t done much significant time for any of his infractions – though he has said this about his jail experiences:

“…getting arrested isn’t too bad, since I’m a bisexual, I don’t have a problem with angry men having sex.”

[From Wikipedia]

Considering Dick is still in jail on only $5,000 bail, he might want to consider giving a crap about his image and not being such a sleaze bag so he can get some work.

It’s got to suck being the sister of Kim Kardashian. You can argue all day about whether her assets are real, but she’s definitely beautiful, at least in a Hollywood sort of way. And depending on your views, her sister Kourtney is even hotter. And then there is Khloe. It’s hard to say if she’s actually unattractive, or just seems that way compared to her more genetically blessed older sisters.

Last fall Khloe got a DUI – which was dramatically reenacted on the family’s reality show Keeping Up With the Kardashians, and framed in a way to make it look like it all happened because Khloe, 24, was having trouble dealing with the anniversary of her father’s death. Now Khloe has to report to jail by this Friday – where she must put in an astounding three days time.

Khloe Kardashian, the youngest of the Kardashian sisters, has been sentenced to three days in Los Angeles County jail for violating probation following a DUI arrest.

“She admitted to failing to complete [roadside cleanup duty] and enroll in an alcohol education class,” said L.A. City Attorney spokesman Frank Mateljan on Monday. “Khloe is ready and willing to serve out her sentence, no matter how long and where, and have this resolved,” her rep tells PEOPLE.

Over the weekend, Kardashian showed no obvious signs of worry about her upcoming jail term, as she attended a party at the Project Beach House in Malibu with her mother and sister Kourtney. “Khloe actually looked great, really relaxed and having a good time,” says a partygoer at Sunday’s Lia Sophia Clambake. “[She] didn’t look like she had a care in the world and even got a massage.”

[From People]

It’s shit like that – massages, not having a “care in the world” – that makes people hate celebrities. Though using that word to describe Khloe Kardashian isn’t exactly accurate. The “partygoer” says it as though it’s a GOOD thing. Thank God Khloe isn’t being burdened with stress or guilt or any feeling of responsibility for getting a DUI! That would be the real crime.

Something tells me Khloe will do just fine in jail. She has one of those faces that says she could beat the shit out of someone if she had to.

Here’s Khloe Kardashian arriving at Platinum Motors in West Hollywood with her brother and his girlfriend to pick up her customized Range Rover on June 30th. Because that’s what someone with a DUI needs. A new car. Header of Khloe celebrating her birthday at Pure nightclub in Vegas on June 27th. Image below of the Kardashian sisters during a taping of The View on 6/25/08. Images thanks to WENN.

It’s no big surprise to say that Amy Winehouse’s lazy, loser, do-nothing jailbird husband (did I use enough adjectives to accurately convey how I really feel here?) has been doing drugs in prison. Despite his claims that he’s clean (and odd reports that he’s tested clean), photographs just emerged of Blake using heroin in jail. Which isn’t likely to help him during his upcoming sentencing for a myriad of criminal offenses.

Junkie Blake Fielder-Civil takes heroin in his prison cell hours before wife Amy Winehouse begs for his release. Our exclusive pictures show him heating the drug on foil before inhaling fumes through a tube – known to addicts as “chasing the dragon”. The skinny and pale lag, who had claimed to be off drugs, is also seen squatting on his cell toilet as he prepares his stash.

Blake, 25, took his fix in London’s Pentonville Prison hours before singer Amy’s pleas for his freedom during her shows at the Nelson Mandela birthday concert and Glastonbury. The lout – who we revealed has been writing sleazy sex letters to a female lag behind Amy’s back – will be sentenced on Thursday for perverting justice and GBH. In January, The Sun exposed a video of Amy, 24, smoking a crack pipe in her flat after taking a cocktail of other drugs.

A Pentonville source said: “Blake takes heroin whenever he can get hold of it. His claims to be clean are a fallacy and it is obvious he remains dependent. There is nothing to suggest he won’t carry on when he’s outside and back with Amy. If she takes him back into her life when she is trying to get clean it will be a recipe for disaster.”

Blake had claimed in letters to lag Melissa Goldstone that he was not taking drugs – but planned to get high when he got out of prison. He also revealed sordid fantasies of what he wanted to do to her, and claimed Amy would like a threesome.

[From the Sun]

We can’t post the pictures here but you can see them on the Sun’s website above. I can’t imagine that this will help him with any kind of clemency with the judge.

In other Winehouse news, Amy is once again dating another guy – all the while insisting her marriage is in great shape. She went out with him (and six bodyguards) to a bar on Saturday night. Always a good choice Amy. Wino has also attacked another fan. She used to be known for being super open and friendly with the public, even when people would show up at her front door for autographs. I’m guessing she’s experiencing some sort of paranoia or something as a result of all the drug use.

Amy, 24, threw a punch at the man as he tried to take her photo. A source said: “Amy had her bottom pinched and blamed the fan taking her picture.

“She just lashed out and clumped him. He laughed it off.” Amy struck out as she arrived at her flat in Camden, North London, late on Saturday.

[From the Sun]

Really, this isn’t the worst thing Wino’s ever done. But she’s managed to keep a pretty strong fan base in spite of all of her issues. If she continues to alienate them, she could lose what little job security she has.

Here’s Amy with the mystery guy on Saturday night. Images thanks to Splash. Amy was being guarded by six bouncers as she was seen with a pack of cards playing solitaire inside Camden’s Marathon bar that night (photographer: Owen Beiny); Images thanks to WENN.

Tatum O’Neal is one lucky lady, at least legally. The actress comes from a long line of family members who have famously battled with addiction. The actress was busted for trying to buy crack and cocaine in early June. She subsequently claimed that she was still sober, but had almost relapsed. Oh and she thanked the cops for arresting her. And seemed to be in a fair amount of denial about the whole thing.

Instead of facing the original drug charges, O’Neal pleaded guilty to a misdemeanor charge of disorderly conduct, and will get off with a pretty lenient sentence.

Crime may not pay, but for Tatum O’Neal, it doesn’t exactly cost all that much, either. The former wild child actress has pleaded guilty to a misdemeanor charge of disorderly conduct stemming from her June crack bust. Prosecutors in turn dropped more serious charges, including drug possession.

To atone for her misdoing, Manhattan Criminal Court Judge Elisa Koenderman sentenced the youngest ever Oscar winner to spend two half-day sessions in a drug-treatment program and pay a $95 fee.

Should the 44-year-old Rescue Me star make good on both conditions of her sentence by Sept. 4, when she’s due back in court, the case against her will be dismissed. O’Neal turned down a nearly identical deal from prosecutors last month in which they offered her the chance to plead guilty to disorderly conduct and spend two days in a treatment. No word on what caused the change of heart.

[From E! News]

That’s one hell of an easy deal. $95 bucks and a total of one day in a treatment program? How is that even a consequence? Or if you don’t want to be retributive, then how is that even helpful? $95 isn’t a punishment, and a day in treatment isn’t helpful. Essentially the court is saying, “You can get away with breaking the law” and/or “We don’t care enough about you to try to get you some help.” The courts have failed from either angle you take in terms of how drug users should be treated.

Let’s hope Tatum cares enough about herself and her family to get herself into some serious and long lasting treatment.

Here’s Tatum O’Neal at the Season Three New York premiere Screening of ‘Rescue Me’ on May 24, 2006. Photographer: Doug Meszler. Images thanks to WENN.

Rageaholic Naomi Campbell got off with a pretty lenient sentence for her latest criminal-level temper tantrum. The Daily Mail has a super detailed rundown of exactly what happened when she freaked out on a flight and attacked the crew and police officers in April. She really sounds more like a rabid animal than a person. I cannot even begin to imagine what is wrong with her – but it sounds like more than just a crazy entitlement complex. She’s definitely certifiably batshit insane.

Naomi Campbell was sentenced to 200 hours community service and fined $4,500 on Friday after her guilty plea in court, where she admitted to assaulting two police officers in London’s Heathrow airport this April, PEOPLE has confirmed.

The supermodel, 38, admitted guilt to four of the six charges she was facing – two counts of assaulting a police officer; one of using threatening, abusive words or behavior to cabin crew; and one of using insulting, abusive, threatening behavior or disorderly conduct likely to cause harassment, alarm or distress.

The Crown Prosecution Service has decided not to pursue the other two charges.

“Ms. Campbell was aggressive, hostile and violent to people who were simply trying to do their jobs,” C.P.S. director Nazir Afzal said in a statement. “Her behavior fell far short of what is acceptable.”

The magistrate told Campbell that her behavior aboard the British Airways plane was “reckless.”

[From People]

Several police reps criticized Campbell’s lenient sentence and said she should at least serve some jail time for assaulting two police officers. It seems to me that the court should also have considered her long history of assaulting innocent people during her fits of rage. What’s most odd to me is that these things always seem to happen over relatively minor problems: accusing her assistant of stealing a pair of jeans, a lost bag, etc. Clearly something is seriously, seriously wrong with the woman – and she’s a danger to others. At the very least, she should be ordered to undergo psychological counseling.

Here’s Naomi arriving at Uxbridge Magistrates’ Court for her court appearance today. Doesn’t she look lovely? Images thanks to WENN.