Katy Perry ‘proves’ she didn’t date Sparkles: ‘I fart in front of him. Properly fart’

Katy Perry

This is the new promotional poster for Katy Perry’s third fragrance, Killer Queen, by Coty. The partnership between Perry and Coty is a new one since Katy grew quite frustrated that her fans weren’t able to get their mani-pedi’d fingers and toes upon her second perfume, Meow. Naturally, this is a ridiculous ad upon its face, but then one realizes that it perfectly accompanies Katy’s usual manner of excess. Besides, Katy named the fragrance for her love of Freddie Mercury, so it’s hard to hate.

On Tuesday, we covered Katy’s admittedly appealing Dolce & Gabbana ensemble on the cover of Elle UK, but the rest of the story quickly devolved into her PR-geared denials of getting with Robert Pattinson in anything other than a friendly capacity. Now Elle UK has revealed yet another layer of the interview that features Katy getting down ‘n’ dirty with her claims about being buddy-buddy with ol’ Sparkles and not breaking the girl-code of ethics with Kristen Stewart. Katy claims that (in addition to her unfortunate ownership of boobs) it’s simply not possible that she could be getting with Sparkles because — get this — she farts in front of him. Seriously:

Katy Perry

Sh-t gets real: “OK, so here’s the proof there was never anything going on with me and Robert Pattinson. I fart in front of him. Properly fart. And I never, ever fart in front of a man I am dating. That’s a rule. He’s my bud, I’m like his big sister. We just hang out. The other day, I said: ‘One of the things I’m most proud of is not sleeping with you, Robert.’ And that’s true.”

[From Elle UK via Hollywood Life]

Sadly, this wee excerpt has blown my mind. First off, I assumed that Katy only farted gumdrops and cotton candy, but I was apparently wrong if Katy’s claims of “properly” farting are any indication. Secondly, I feel kind of sad for Katy now that she is obviously not farting in front of John Mayer because — let’s face it — if anyone deserves to be farted upon, it’s John Mayer. Thirdly, did Katy never, ever fart in front of Russell Brand? Because forget about accusations of adultery and one-sided drug use, a lack of farting is is obviously why that marriage failed.

Let ‘er rip, Katy. You’ll feel better. And since Sparkles is an armpit licker, I’m pretty sure he’s a willing particpant in the art of farting.

In closing, here are some photos of Rob at the grocery store earlier this month. Since I’ve obviously lost all semblance of maturity at this point, I’ll just readily admit to being highly amused at Edward Cullen buying toilet paper. Because … farting.

Robert Pattinson

Robert Pattinson

Katy Perry

Photos courtesy of Coty, Fame/Flynet, WENN & Elle UK

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115 Responses to “Katy Perry ‘proves’ she didn’t date Sparkles: ‘I fart in front of him. Properly fart’”

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  1. David99 says:

    Bedhead this was a funny post!

  2. Sixer says:

    My question is: how do you NOT fart in front of someone if you need to fart? Run out of the room? What if you’re in a car? Answers on a postcard, please.

    For the record, I fart if I eat anything sugar-free (ie with sweeteners). Whether Sparkles is around or not.

    • emmie_a says:

      Maltitol makes me a fart. Properly. In front of everyone.

    • JennJ says:

      Hold it in and carry it around all day until I get am outside alone or get home. I’m not even aware of doing it. (Insert joke or psychological analysis here! :) )

      • Monty says:

        I’ve been married 14 years and never properly farted infront of my husband………while awake anyway. Ok, I’ve let small ones go (having first strategically shifted down wind) but faaaarted? God No! That would give him permission to start tooting infront of me, and THAT is my idea of hell. Just No.

      • Sixer says:

        Everyone farts with gay abandon in our house, usually with the announcement “Don’t panic, it won’t smell!” I suddenly feel very low rent! *cringes*

      • Tessa says:

        I’ve never let a fart rip in public, or in front of a significant other. Ever. I guess I have good sphincter control? Who knows, but I have never done it, and generally wait for some privacy. It’s like I’ve never taken a shit out in the open either. I generally do that on a toilet.

      • Kcaia says:

        I rarely fart, and when I do they rarely stink. But I had to take a laxative the other night, and sometime in the night, my husband left the bed for the couch bc, apparently, it was nauseating in there that night.

    • Bird says:

      Another ‘hold it in’ lady here. I’ve been with my husband for almost 20 years and have NEVER farted in front of him, at least not that he knows about lol.

      • Nicolette says:

        +1. I just can’t do it. But sometimes one creeps up on you and you have no control. I just keep going like nothing happened hoping he wont notice!

    • Bigglesworth says:

      She hasn’t had kids. Wait until she pushes one out from “down below,” she’ll be farting when she coughs, sneezes, lifts anything heavy…you get the idea. Furthermore, I don’t think she slept with Sparkles, but who cares? They were both single.

      • shahdhch says:

        Is she going to be having the baby out of her anus? I have had two children and while I might pee a little while doing those things I do not fart. Maybe I just have a tight a$$ literally and figuratively, I have never farted in front of my significant other either.

  3. menlisa says:

    Anyone else feel like Perry is trying way too hard these days to be interesting?
    Like pimping her relationships and friendships in order to get headlines.

    Or has she always been this attention seeking?

    • emmie_a says:

      Look at her hair, makeup and clothing. She has always been this attention seeking! We’re just used to her style by now so she’s trying to get us to notice her with her deep thoughts.

    • Tessa says:

      This is one case where I think it was not about pimping a friendship, but putting an end to a tabloid fantasy that has been given way too much traction in the media. Her name was dragged into the Robsten breakup and drama. I think she had every right to address it. She had nothing to do with the breakup, hasn’t been two faced to Kristen, and all of the stories were crap, and she wanted people to know that. She gets a pass on this one. Sure, she’s over the top and famewhorey, but not about this imo.

    • Shannon says:

      Yeah like shut up already about how she’s not dating Sparkles. Oh here’s more proof!!! I fart in front of him!!!

      And didn’t Russell say she was always farting in front of him? She was the queen of flatulence or something? So this silly bulls*t means nothing.

    • Tiffany :) says:

      I agree. She has an album coming out but all of her interviews are about other people! Sparkles, John Mayer, Russell Brand, Rhianna, Kristen Stewart, etc.

      Her tactics are pretty obvious. That, or she is REALLY unexcited about her new music.

  4. Izzy says:

    The only thing this proves to me is that she should try some probiotics.

  5. Lucy says:

    I have never once said to a male friend of mine “One of the things I’m most proud of is not sleeping with you” or anything similar.

    If you say something like that, even think it, it clearly means that you’ve thought about having sex with him in the first place.

    Not exactly very sisterly! ;)

    • Tessa says:

      Yeah, it implies at least an interest or an attraction. Like, she’s thought about it…

    • Nicole says:

      Exactly. What “sister” tells her “brother” that one of the things she’s most proud of is that she never slept with him? Methinks she is in denial and is kidding herself when she claims she sees him like a brother. She is all but admitting that she wants him, but has restrained herself for some other reason, possibly an awareness that it wouldn’t work out and then she’d lose him as a friend?

  6. Guest says:

    She is sooo gross period. She is aging out of the bubble gum pop genre, think she is trying to make as much money as possible before riding into the sunset.

  7. Melanie says:

    I can’t believe I read a post about farting. God I need a life. Katy Perry is gross.

  8. lady mary. says:

    why is she goin on and on abt robert bein only friends with her now?

    • Jen says:

      It does seem like she is rambling on and on about something she has already addressed in the text to Kristen. Another keep them guessing for no one will know what went on with Katy and Rob except Katy and Rob.

  9. blue marie says:

    ha, I get gassy when I get nervous and “properly fart” in front of a lot of folks. all this proves is that she wanted to remind Rob of Kristen. ha, totally kidding. she’s really reaching for some quotes though.

    • lana86 says:

      really? is it like, a normal thing to fart in public in US? i’m realy curious. I’ve lived for 26 years in Eastern Europe, and has never witnessed anyone’s farting that i can remember, haha)) only from some of my ex boyfriends’

  10. AB says:

    I like her Elle cover more than the Vogue cover.

    • Lamb says:

      I think she looks incredibly dumb on the cover of Elle. She’s standing there, like, “Uh, I guess I’ll hold my shoe, derpa derp.”

      • AB says:

        Haha your comment seriously almost made me spit my coffee out… you’re right… but I don’t care I still like it better… I think her face looks prettier

  11. DawnOfDagon says:

    Those tights are really nice.

  12. stevie says:

    I think I would be a bit offended if someone said to me “hey, I’m proud that I haven’t slept with you. “

  13. Skins says:

    Methinks she doth protest too much

  14. MeowuiRose says:

    Her songs are dangerously catchy but she doesn’t have any redeeming qualities in my eyes. She comes of as incredibly shallow and being with John Mayer doesn’t help. One nice thing I will say…..I liked when she had super colorful hair.

  15. T.C. says:

    Sparkles like stinky armpits so he might be into the farting too. Katy, you in danger girl. He’s going to be all up in your grill now.

  16. SnarkySnarkers says:

    Coors Light AND toilet paper? Not very sparkly at all! This story was hilarious.

  17. Emily C. says:

    If you can’t fart in front of someone, you really shouldn’t be having sex with him.

    • Tessa says:

      Your opinion. I disagree. I typically keep my bodily functions to myself, and don’t share them with anyone. I don’t wipe my snot of my boyfriends sleeve, or show him my earwax. There are certain things he doesn’t need to know. He doesn’t need to hear and smell my farts. It doesn’t add anything to our relationship, and I am more than fine taking care of my bodily functions privately.

      • Amanduh says:

        Agreed. My husband has never heard me fart and he never will (if I can help it). I think relationships need a little bit of cache…he doesn’t need to hear me do that. Ever.

      • Emily C. says:

        Wiping boogers on someone is unhygienic. And you would have to go out of your way to either wipe boogers on someone or show them your earwax. You have to go out of your way to NOT fart in front of someone. And if you’re having sex, you’re sharing plenty of bodily functions already, and frankly, I don’t see how it’s possible to control occasionally farting during sex.

      • Amanduh says:

        Okay…I’ll say it: vagina ‘farts’ (hate the ‘q’ word!) are something different (in my opinion!) than, you know…bum farts. Squeeze your ass cheeks together and ‘bum farts’ don’t make a sound. Vagina farts have a mind of their own!! :)

      • Ginger says:

        Same here! I try to keep a little mystery in my husbands eyes. I also don’t really groom in front of him either except brushing my teeth. I like him to believe in the myth of a “natural” beauty! LOL We ladies are magical like that. But I won’t judge how others choose to live. I’m just not a burping/farting/leave the bathroom door open kind of gal.

      • Keats says:

        @Amanduh…I find it endlessly funny that ‘vagina farts’ is your preferred term and i don’t know why? Maybe I need to go back to junior high where I belong.

      • amanduh says:

        @ Keats: Right!!? The ‘q’ word just sounds gross in my opinion. I feel like my English Granny would have said “vagina farts” and would make it sound classy. Well, as classy as it could sound. I can’t think of a better term…Vagina sigh? Vagina exhale? Vagina puff? I’m 32 going on 12, I swear.

      • Jen says:

        I would have to throw my period in there also. I remember one time leaving the toilet to run and get some pads and didn’t flush because I was coming back. My husband saw the blood in the toilet and almost fainted. LMAO about that.

    • Mika says:

      Does controlling your fart and releasing it little by little to mute the sound counts? I do that a lot and mine don’t smell and no one ever notice it. I never let my fart go on full blast in front of anyone else. I only do it in the early morning (alone, of course) when I get all gassy and stuff…

      Le boyfriend shamelessly farts but I don’t make a fuss of it unless it stinks. TMI, I know.

      • Amanduh says:

        We’re totally on the same page ;)
        Little puffs, no smell or sound. And yes, “full on” by myself too :)
        And “Le Hubby” (you sound adorable, btw) has no shame either…

  18. s_s says:

    My 13 yo daughter pointed out to me that the song Killer Queen is about a prostitute. Ha!

  19. Nerd Alert says:

    I have a rule, too. I can’t take women seriously who won’t fart in front of men. Since it’s already Katy Perry, no contradictions here!

    PS Dear Sparkles, Coors Light is disgusting. If you ever try good beer one day, you’ll know.

    • Emily C. says:

      +1

    • Tiffany :) says:

      “Dear Sparkles, Coors Light is disgusting. If you ever try good beer one day, you’ll know.”

      Love it!!!! I was horrified by that in his cart too! I have been into craft beer for a while now, and stuff like coors light just looks like dirty water to me now. Ick!

  20. kingkayski says:

    She kind of look stumpy in that Elle picture,not a good pose for her.I think she’s been trying to jump Sparkles bones since the beginning,maybe the feeling is not mutual,Sparkle only see her as mother figure,somebody to unload his trouble.

  21. Jewels says:

    Omg this article was hilarious! I don’t fart in front of my boyfriend unless I’m asleep…then it’s another story.

    • Nicolette says:

      We all do that, you have no control at all then. Don’t you hate it when one wakes you up and you hope he wasn’t awake to hear it? LOL.

  22. lori says:

    SO I guess all the blind items about John Mayers love of Toilet play in the bedroom are not true

  23. annaloo. says:

    I think stage performers secretly fart all the time up there.

    • Chloeee says:

      Which would make sense between the volume and sheer number of people you can really let it happen without anyone knowing.

  24. lisa says:

    just because a relationship is platonic doesnt make it ok to fart in front of me

  25. Trudy says:

    Katy Perry is obviously throwing some shade at Beyonce in these pics, which is a total copy of Beyonce’s tour commercial. Notice the crown on the floor resembles the one that Beyonce wore in her ad. I think Katy hates Bey, she also said some time ago that if her and Rihanna did a song it “wouldn’t be “Beautiful Liar”, it would be better”.

    I don’t know why she would blatantly do this ad if she wasn’t trying to say something.

    • Tiffany :) says:

      I noticed the similarities to Beyonce’s tour promos too…it looks like they were shot in the same room!

      Didn’t think about symbolism of the crown on the floor being about B, though. I thought it was like the Queen knocked out the King…but it could be a Beyonce reference.

  26. Lisa says:

    I know it’s not the point of the article, but I’m laughing so hard at this budget Mrs. Carter wannabe shoot.

  27. sassykassie says:

    Her comment about being proud of not sleeping with him almost sounds like a challenge to me. “Hey Rob, I’m so hard to get. Look at my sweaty, lickable arm pits. *pffft*” Yep, I think thou doth protesteth too much. She’s either already slept with him or wants to.

  28. Saffie says:

    Between that hilariously campy perfume ad and this talk of farting…I am speechless…and that says a lot.

  29. Mia says:

    Ew. This is just TMI. And I personally try not to fart in front of anyone if I can help it. I usually try to make it to a bathroom. But a husband is a different story. If she doesn’t fart in front of anyone she’s with, did that extend to her husband? Because keeping that facade up in front of anyone you are that intimately involved with and are supposedly with 24/7 is utterly ridiculous.

    • Amanduh says:

      …in your opinion. Which is fine, you’re more than entitled, but it’s not “utterly ridiculous” to some.

      • Mia says:

        Well, of course it is, which is why I said “personally”. And my parents and all the married couples I know regularly fart and burp in front of their spouses. They say excuse me, but they don’t get up and leave the room to do it the same way a couple that is just dating would. I think because at that point the jig is up and you’re (planning) on staying married and intimate with this person for the rest of your life. What is the point of hiding your natural body functions from someone that you are married to? That is my point.

      • Amanduh says:

        Sorry…I didn’t see the “personally” when I read the last sentence, “Because keeping that facade up in front of anyone you are that intimately involved with and are supposedly with 24/7 is utterly ridiculous.”
        The point of hiding it: it’s gross…in my opinion. My parents have been married 41 years and my Mom won’t fart in front of my Dad. The “jig is up” but I PERSONALLY don’t think you should ‘let it all hang out’…literally and figuratively.

      • Mia says:

        Then I guess I should have added “personally” to that last sentence? But I thought it was clear that my entire comment is based on my personal opinion. We just have to agree to disagree based on our difference in opinion. My parents have been married for 35 years, they have seen each other at their worst and their best, the jig is up and there is no point in hiding the ugly anymore, lol. It hasn’t effected how they feel about each other, or their ideas about romance because they’re actually going to spend the next week in Europe celebrating their 35th anniversary. I’m sure when they’re alone in their hotel room in Paris, in one of the most beautiful and romantic cities in the world, if one them needs to fart, they’ll do it in front of each other there too. Lol. And that’s what marriage and true intimacy are about to me: being comfortable to be yourself in front of your spouse and knowing that you are loved and attractive anyway. That’s why I think it’s ridiculous to not burp or fart if you need to in front of your own husband or wife.

      • Amanduh says:

        Okay…let’s agree to disagree. You’re smart, opinionated and fun to play devil’s advocate with :)
        Not that it matters, but I am comfy with my hubby (he has seen me at my worst! And saw me give birth!) I just personally don’t find it attractive to fart in front of him…and vice versa.
        ps. Congrats to your rents on 35 years…that’s awesome!

      • Amanduh says:

        Okay…let’s agree to disagree. You’re smart, opinionated and fun to play devil’s advocate with ;)
        Not that it matters, but I am comfy with my hubby (he has seen me at my worst! And saw me give birth!) I just personally don’t find it attractive to fart in front of him…and vice versa.
        ps. Congrats to your rents on 35 years…that’s awesome!

      • Mia says:

        Thanks! I’ll let them know that Amanduh from Celebitchy said congrats on their anniversary and they’ll be like “Huh?”, but confused or no they’ll be appreciative of your well wishes. ;-) And you’re right, bodily functions like farting and burping are real but also gross and unattractive, so more power to you for making an effort to keep those smells and sounds from each other, lol. I know I couldn’t do it for an extended period of time, a lot of other folks I know don’t bother, but it IS nice to keep some kind of mystery alive in a marriage, lol. :-)

  30. magpie says:

    She needs to shut up. I think all her comments are disrespectful to both Rob and Kristen. She’s trying to stay relevent and I wouldn’t be surprized if her camp leaked the Katy/Rob rumors in the first place.

  31. Diana says:

    These comments are killing me! Oh God, my tummy hurts from all the laughter. I’ve never EVER farted in front of anyone, much less a boyfriend or partner. I was taught it was highly impolite to fart infront of others.

    • Mika says:

      Yeah agreed. IDK how and when but over the years, I’ve developed the skill of releasing my fart little by little to mute the sound. It’s pretty damn useful in the public. There’s no guarantee that the smell can be “muted” too tho.

    • Tiffany :) says:

      I find the comments about “mine don’t smell” to be especially funny! As if anyone’s nose is objective about their own odors! Ha!

  32. LaLa says:

    My god… I feel so sorry for all of you women holding in your farts around your partners. What is the big deal, honestly? I for one am not willing to suffer through horrible stomach cramps to put on a show for my husband and I wouldn’t expect him to do the same.

    If you’re that scared to let the person you’re sleeping with, married to, have children with, etc… hear you fart then you’ve got serious problems.

    Relax!

  33. Lucy says:

    …Katy, please shut up and put your money where your mouth is.

  34. Lark says:

    This whole interview is kind of a hot mess. “I’m so proud of not sleeping with you?” WTF? Who says that to a friend? Although it does kind of imply that Sparkles made a move on her and she shot him down, which is interesting… The farting thing. The texting thing. The shade she threw at Rihanna. The sort of shade she threw at Beyonce. The constant babbling about John Mayer. Rein it in, Katy. She and Kristen both share the same publicist, and they need to fire that woman and get a new one. Aside, she does look beautiful in these photos.

  35. Holden says:

    Please marry John Mayer, do it quickly.

  36. Jennifer12 says:

    Um…. when did she become the new Jenny McCarthy?

  37. Annie says:

    Hmm, well I’m exactly the opposite Katy! I’d “properly” fart and burp in front of someone I was having sex with (cause hey, I figure they’re all body functions right?) but try to avoid in front of someone I was just platonic friends or brother/sister type friends with.

  38. Leslie says:

    Katy Perry is the epitome of low class.

  39. Ella says:

    Re: about whether she ever farted in front of Russell, there was a whole back-and-forth between them when they were married … He joked on Twitter that she farted constantly, and she insisted that she didn’t, and “never once, in front of HIM”. Russell is the type of guy you could be yourself with, not shocked by anything, so I’m surprised if she kept up that policy with him … but then again, the hardly ever saw each other when they were married, so …maybe it’s not so surprising.

  40. Str8Shooter says:

    Wow. What a classless bitch.

    Man, just when you think she couldn’t sink lower, now she’s talking about passing gas?

  41. Ella says:

    BTW, excerpt from Katy’s Elle article:
    *****
    I suggest she’s drawn to Byronic men and she falls momentarily silent. “Byronic?” she repeats. Mad, bad, and dangerous to know, I say. She looks more intrigued than annoyed. “I’m going to remember that word. But that’s not right. The men I have gone for are challenging, yes, but they’re also wildly intelligent and poetic.” It’s astonishing Katy is still unwilling to heap anything other than praise on Russell — especially since, in the year since the marriage ended, he has consistently made crass and flippant jokes about the split. Katy, for her part, has retained her dignity — a masterclass in good manners.
    ***

    This is “WTF” on so many levels — a masterclass in good manners?? Heaping praise on Russell? Russell consistently making crass jokes about the split? What planet is this writer living on? Russell has not made crass jokes; HE is the one who has “heaped praise” on Katy if anything, while she has trashed him every chance she could (albeit in a mostly cryptic, passive aggressive way). I guess because when he is asked about the divorce, he answers candidly and honestly, rather than speaking in riddles, he is considered “crass” by this writer?!

    And also, of COURSE she didn’t know the “Byronic” reference. Of course. She also didn’t know anything about Jack Kerouac until Russell shared his favorite part of “On the Road” with her, and then she based the lyrics to “Firework” directly on it. Which she never gives Russell any credit for, of course.

    • JuicyFruit says:

      Agree with everything you said. It’s obvious she has no idea that Byron was a poet! LOL!!

      • Kaykay says:

        Actually, it sounds like neither of them know that Byron is a poet. Imagine that, a pop star and a hack writer at Elle, a publication known for it’s cutting edge literary and historical insights, don’t know about a notorious Romanic era writer. Mashugana! Does this mean that Katy doesn’t know who Kant or Jorge Luis Borges are either? I’m going to have to re-evaluate my whole reading of her work now!

        ps. Ironically, Katy’s description of her taste in men is actually closer to the definition of Byronic than what the writer gave as the definition. It’s also a huge cliché that everyone uses when they describe Russell in print. So all it shows to me is Katy didn’t read Russell’s press when they hooked up.

      • Ella says:

        KayKay – I knew someone might scoff and say “Why should a pop star know what Byronic means?” – and I guess it is a stretch to expect her to know who Byron was, but as you said later, the description “Byronic” has been so commonly applied to Russell, you’d think she would know it for that reason if nothing else. I always got the impression she knew very little about him — she once commented that she had not read his books, because she’d rather “know him in the present, not read about his past” or something. While I guess that makes a certain amount of sense, I think if I was married to someone who had written 2 books, I would read them.

        At any rate, my criticism about this article is more about the writer than KP; as you said, she sounds like a hack who just cobbled together a bunch of cliches from other articles.

        Side note – she said Katy is “drawn to Byronic men” – so does that mean John Mayer is Byronic too? Travie McCoy?

    • Gretchen says:

      Hahaha I love this
      “But that’s not right. The men I have gone for are challenging, yes, but they’re also wildly intelligent and poetic.” Ummmmmmm, much like Byron then.

      Kaykay: “mad, bad and dangerous to know” was how Lady Caroline Lamb, one of Byron’s lovers described him, so the writer is directly quoting her.

      • KayKay says:

        Gretchen: Yeah fine, but that quote from LCL describes Byron himself. Byronic, the adjective, is more specifically defined in relation to the way Byron fashioned his poetic protagonists, thinly veiled versions of the way he’d like to have seen himself, such as in The Corsair. It’s a definite distinction and Katy’s description fits a lot closer to the proper use of the word and that’s why I say it’s ironic.

        I highly doubt the ‘journalist’ that wrote up the article knows who Byron is. More likely, she was just parroting the descriptions of Russell that have been circulated since that unauthorized bio done almost a decade ago used it for its title. The woman hardly even seems to know anything about Katy, and even less about Russell since most of the info in the article is either wrong, fed to her by Katy’s team, or cut and pasted from the other hundred interviews Katy has done. Katy sounds like the woman was boring her to death so she stuck to the script. In any case, it’s a terrible article. Katy needs new PR. The woman clearly tried to imply Katy is semi-illiterate. Why would her publicist let this go through? But why the hell should Katy know that word? She knows exactly what she needs to. Years ago, when she wasn’t letting her management script her interviews, she was a fun, intelligent girl. She needs to bring that girl back out.

  42. drea says:

    Looks like shes ripping off Beyonce

  43. Asdfg says:

    What the hell is a “proper fart”?

  44. F5 says:

    What a pig.

  45. Ms. Melli Mel says:

    How is farting that bad?

  46. TOPgirl says:

    I predict that in the near future there will be a whole lot more than farting between these two.

  47. Brandi says:

    I don’t know the difference between a fart and a “proper fart” but I do know EVERYBODY DOES IT, HELLO!! It’s called Mother Nature. Just like once I was pregnant I had 2 do what I had 2 do when that baby was coming instead of “Sorry Dr. Rowland, I’m skipping L&D”. I’m a lady & I’ll be @ my house ALONE having this baby in my bathtub. I’ll call ya if I need ya. LATER!!

  48. Lauraq says:

    I try really hard not to fart in front of my bofriend, but sometimes one pops out. He, on the other hand, has never farted in front of me in the more than two years we’ve been hooked up. Well…audibly. There have been a couple times where s weird smell has silently invaded. Still though.