To quote Whitney Houston, I believe the children are our future. The children of the UK keep on brutalizing Prince William’s ego and reputation. I would be shocked if they hadn’t already nicknamed Prince Oldhead. Just a few weeks ago, William asked a group of schoolkids to guess his age. They guessed “57.” Then, on Thursday, William was in Manchester to introduce yet another baroque scheme of “donating” a small amount of money while saddling several charities with a lot of rules and bureaucracy. This time, the Royal Foundation is putting up part of a £100,000 charitable scheme spread out over three years. This is… not a lot of money, especially given that it’s spread out over multiple charities, over three years. One of the children at William’s event must have done the math on it and the child started asking the right questions:
The Prince of Wales has said he “doesn’t know” how much money is in his bank account after a question from an 11-year-old boy.
The Prince was visiting Manchester’s Moss Side to learn about a project tackling youth violence with Andy Burnham, the city’s mayor. He announced a £100,000 scheme, funded jointly by the Royal Foundation and the Labour politician’s office, which will bolster the work of the Manchester Peace Together Alliance.
As he met young people and volunteers at the Hideaway Youth Project, which is a lead partner of the Manchester Peace Together Alliance, the Prince sat down with some schoolchildren working on a collage.
Amir Hassan, 11, made the Royal laugh when he asked him: “How much do you have in your bank account?”
The schoolboy said afterwards the future king had quipped he “didn’t know”.
Prince William was also asked whether he wanted to join the art project, where the children were cutting out hairstyles they thought were empowering and positive, and replied: “I’m literally the last person you should ask. My hair is disappearing.” He also briefly joined a game of pool and produced groans from the watching guests when he twice failed to pot a yellow ball.
William was overheard stage-whispering “seize him” to an aide and the child was quickly taken to the Tower of London. I jest, but you know that William probably wasn’t happy at the peasant child’s impertinence. If an 11-year-old boy questions why a rich prince is donating such a small amount, imagine what the adults think. And by the way, William inherited the Duchy of Cornwall tax-free. The Duchy is a vast real estate empire worth around $1.5 billion, and William gets an annual income of around $7.5 million from the duchy. He also has money that his mother left him, plus whatever he’s embezzled from the Royal Foundation, plus everything else. The child was right to ask him about his bank account.
He truly went Full Lurch on Thursday.
Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Cover Images.
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- Prince William, Prince of Wales visits the Hideaway Youth Project, lead partner of the Manchester Peace Together Alliance during his visit to Moss Side on November 16, 2023 in Manchester, England. The Prince of Wales has unveiled a three year commitment to help reduce youth violence in Manchester, supporting the work of Manchester Peace Together Alliance. NO UK USE FOR 48 HOURS,Image: 822432199, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: NO UK USE FOR 48 HOURS- Fee Payable Upon reproduction – For queries contact Avalon sales@Avalon.red London +44 20 7421 6000 Los Angeles +1 310 822 0419 Berlin +49 30 76 212 251 Madrid +34 91 533 42 89, *** NO UK USE FOR 48 HRS ***, Model Release: no, Credit line: Avalon.red / Avalon
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- Prince William, Prince of Wales visits the Hideaway Youth Project, lead partner of the Manchester Peace Together Alliance during his visit to Moss Side on November 16, 2023 in Manchester, England. The Prince of Wales has unveiled a three year commitment to help reduce youth violence in Manchester, supporting the work of Manchester Peace Together Alliance. NO UK USE FOR 48 HOURS,Image: 822432293, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: NO UK USE FOR 48 HOURS- Fee Payable Upon reproduction – For queries contact Avalon sales@Avalon.red London +44 20 7421 6000 Los Angeles +1 310 822 0419 Berlin +49 30 76 212 251 Madrid +34 91 533 42 89, *** NO UK USE FOR 48 HRS ***, Model Release: no, Credit line: Avalon.red / Avalon
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- Prince William, Prince of Wales visits the Hideaway Youth Project, lead partner of the Manchester Peace Together Alliance during his visit to Moss Side on November 16, 2023 in Manchester, England. The Prince of Wales has unveiled a three year commitment to help reduce youth violence in Manchester, supporting the work of Manchester Peace Together Alliance. NO UK USE FOR 48 HOURS,Image: 822432415, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: NO UK USE FOR 48 HOURS- Fee Payable Upon reproduction – For queries contact Avalon sales@Avalon.red London +44 20 7421 6000 Los Angeles +1 310 822 0419 Berlin +49 30 76 212 251 Madrid +34 91 533 42 89, *** NO UK USE FOR 48 HRS ***, Model Release: no, Credit line: Avalon.red / Avalon
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- The Prince of Wales arriving for his visit to The Hideaway Youth Project in Moss Side, Manchester, to mark the launch of Royal Foundation Community Impact Project and to learn more about the work of the Manchester Peace Together Alliance to reduce violence amongst young people. Featuring: William, Prince of Wales Where: Manchester, United Kingdom When: 16 Nov 2023 Credit: PA Images/INSTARimages **NORTH AMERICA RIGHTS ONLY**
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- The Prince of Wales plays pool during his visit to The Hideaway Youth Project in Moss Side, Manchester, to mark the launch of Royal Foundation Community Impact Project and to learn more about the work of the Manchester Peace Together Alliance to reduce violence amongst young people. Where: Manchester, United Kingdom When: 16 Nov 2023 Credit: PA Images/INSTARimages **NORTH AMERICA RIGHTS ONLY**
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- The Prince of Wales plays pool during his visit to The Hideaway Youth Project in Moss Side, Manchester, to mark the launch of Royal Foundation Community Impact Project and to learn more about the work of the Manchester Peace Together Alliance to reduce violence amongst young people. Featuring: William, Prince of Wales Where: Manchester, United Kingdom When: 16 Nov 2023 Credit: PA Images/INSTARimages **NORTH AMERICA RIGHTS ONLY**
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- The Prince of Wales speaks to service users during a visit to The Hideaway Youth Project in Moss Side, Manchester, to mark the launch of Royal Foundation Community Impact Project and to learn more about the work of the Manchester Peace Together Alliance to reduce violence amongst young people. Featuring: William, Prince of Wales Where: Manchester, United Kingdom When: 16 Nov 2023 Credit: PA Images/INSTARimages **NORTH AMERICA RIGHTS ONLY**
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- The Prince of Wales during his visit to The Hideaway Youth Project in Moss Side, Manchester, to mark the launch of Royal Foundation Community Impact Project and to learn more about the work of the Manchester Peace Together Alliance to reduce violence amongst young people Featuring: William, Prince of Wales Where: MANCHESTER, United Kingdom When: 16 Nov 2023 Credit: PA Images/INSTARimages **NORTH AMERICA RIGHTS ONLY**
I love the accompanying pic of him looking ever so much like full on Mr. Burns gloating over piles of money.
I thought it’s been widely reported that the ducky gets the owner – in this case William – around 24 million a year.
Has he run it into the ground since Charles was in charge already?
Word is Charles ringbarked a lot of stuff so that William can’t run it into the ground. Whether that was born of his own petty stinginess or if it was on orders from Lizzie, who knows.
I thought it’s been widely reported that the ducky gets the owner – in this case William – around 24 million a year. Like. Widely widely reported.
Has he run it into the ground since Charles was in charge already?
The header pic was so perfect for this post, I lol’d. William continues to give Kaiser plenty of material to work with, he’s so un-photogenic
The Daily Mail reports at the last count, Charles, in 2021 earned US$27million from the Duchy of Cornwall now passed to his son William. Where it all goes seems a bit dodgy since the personal Royal accounts are never divulged. Charles now benefits from the Duchy of Lancaster which brings in a bit more at $US30m a year. Not bad for a couple of grifters.
So Willy chucks 100,000 pounds at the youth project – about a day and a half’s loot from the Duchy.
Patrick (Nona93)
Oh no – this wealthy bully’s *foundation* (so not even his personal duchy) is only donating PART of the £100,000, and parceling it out over a few years. They keep making statements designed to make it appear that they are donating large sums, but the last time he and his wife claimed to have donated what – £250,000 “in partnership with” an organisation in Wales, their financial records showed that they had only donated a paltry £13,000 of that sum.
So as another poster said, we may well find out much later that William’s donation was not much more than £10, but he got his name attached to an existing project and all the praise from the sycophantic media for “making a substantial” (though unspecified) donation”.
There he is, being Mr Sexiest Bald Guy 2023. Raaaaaarrrrrrrr….
Lol. Yes I heard about this . I think the only way anyone in their right mind would ever think William the bald is sexy is if the competition is being voted on and judged by Stevie wonder and Ray Charles . Because even if they couldn’t see him and manage to touch his face, one touch is all they would need to tell them that ain’t nothing and I do mean nothing is sexy about lurch.
Y José Feliciano diría que no hay manera de que este tipo sea sexy. Translation
And Jose Feliciano (who sings Feliz Navidad) would say, there’s no way in hell this guy is sexy!
Boy, William is as dull as dishwater and that he doesn’t know how much he has in his bank account tells you that he has too much money.
Yeah, rich people dont know how much they have in their bank account. Poor people know every penny.
William has probably never even seen a bank statement in his life.
No doubt the bank account is offshore. And probably more than one.
Yes, ‘which one’ was probably his first thought. Of course he has no idea, he has people to deal with dirty day to day matters like that. Common folk.
Although, as I type I’m also imagining him Scrooge McDuck style sitting in a vault counting his money endlessly.
When Charles ran the duchy it made about $24 million in profits. Assuming William didn’t break it, he’s raking it in.
I used to work at a bank and the rich people always knew exactly how much money was coming in and going out. I’m sure William knows how much money down to the penny is in his accounts. Supposedly, William is extremely cheap, considering how much money he gave these charities it looks like the rumours are true. And the only reason he gave anything at all is because people have called him out on his visits without substance and of course because Harry always gives away money.
Could also be read as how much of our taxpayer money do you have, in offshore accounts? Of course he doesn’t know since Liz went to great lengths to hide it.
William has the duchy money now. He will get to see the monarch’s bank accounts when he becomes King.
I hope that William was smart enough to realize WHY the child asked him that question.
He’s pretty stupid, so he might not have put two and two together— and he definitely might underestimate a child and think that a kid would for sure think £100K is a lot of money.
Clearly this kid knows the deal and even he realized that William could find that amount under his couch cushions.
LOL to the photo selection for the title 😂. For someone who has SPACE when it comes to his brother, he really has an issue with not knowing how to create appropriate space when around people at his engagements lately. I feel uncomfortable with how close he is to the people seated in front of him. It reminds me of the many times he was literally in your face at some engagements.
He’s a “close talker”. #Seinfeld
LOL at the Seinfeld reference…I can’t stand close talkers.
But William somehow manages to look creepy whenever he does it, so it’s even worse.
LOL. hilarious kid. they always say the most ridiculous things to clown face people. willy has no idea how much blood money is in the bank bc it’s all royal blood money. similar to his brother before, both just got handed monies and have no concept of anything financial bc they know they’ll never run out and can just ask daddy.
You mean Harry? The one who shopped bargain sales? The one Meghan bought a couch for? Is that who you are saying never ran out of money?
Who Harry? The guy who hated that he had to be dependent on his father for financing?
The Harry who had to shop end of year sales at a discount store? The Harry whose shoes had holes in them because he didn’t have money for new ones? The Harry who was told by his billionaire father that Meghan should keep working because there wasn’t enough money to support her? The Harry who carried his clothes back from school in a literal black trash bag? The Harry whose wife bought their furniture and (probably) paid for the entire Frogmore Cott renovation with her own savings?
Ahhhhh yes, I can see why you lump Harry and his brother, Peg the Egghead, into the same category when it comes to financial access and parental financial support. Their experiences were exactly the same. /s
Peg the egg head !! !
Harry spoke about that in spare actually and seems to recognize how sheltered he was from making financial decisions. Imagine he’s had a steep learning curve since leaving. Think he made a joke recently in that video for veterans about checking something with his financial advisors.
You can’t possibly be speaking about Prince Harry who used to shop at TK Maxx and lived in a hovel with no furniture and low ceilings until he was rescued from that evil toxic family by his wife Meghan.
yes, that harry that wrote in Spare that he leaned on his dad for salary, money for official events outfits, but had no financial independence and bought bargain clothes and no furniture because there was no concept of personal finances when you’re in the family. when he was in the family, u think he could tell you his bank account balance? and please, can we not paint him as destitute?? sure he wore bargain clothes and had no furniture, but i think that’s a reflection of how sheltered he was while also having a multimillion dollar inheritance from his mother thats 100% his.
How do you know when it became 100% his? He was a child when Diana died so it was likely in some sort of trust or was possibly invested and tied up in some way. I don’t think anyone thinks he was destitute except in comparison to how the rest of the royals lived. And Will supposedly runs the duchy of cornwall. He’s not much of a manager of it if he has no idea of its value or his income.
Why is he aiming at the yellow ball and not the white one?
Also, I hate to make a cue ball joke looking at these photos of William, but the it’s RIGHT. THERE!
I assume he’s aiming at the white ball but in both snooker pics his cue stick is positioned at a ludicrous distance from the target. As a refined man of leisure you’think he’d at least be good at what was once a “gentleman’s sport”. Sorry, Wills. Next time take those marginalized youth on a fox hunt and really show them who’s boss!
Omg @Barnabus I’m cackling at your last sentence 😭
This man should just stay home. Even floating around his country he looks awkward and awful. Such a waste|
“This man should just stay home” is really all that needs to be said. He manages to makes an ass of himself basically every time he leaves.
Next question should be how much does William donate to charity
I would have liked the follow up question to have been, “do you pay as much tax as my parents?”
If he ever comes to DC, I’ll ask him. 100k is a drop in the bucket for these types of programs. It’ll end up being roughly 1200 per charity per year. It’s absolute bs
@Tessa – that would be the more pertinent question but, no-one would dare ask him.
As for the youngster I thought it was a ‘cute’ question rather than a rude one which is probably why PW laughed. After all we’re all raised on the Disney belief that kings and princes have more money than anyone-else in the land. It’s only when we get older and see these people for who they really are that we realise the majority of them are a bunch of greedy con artists.
@Laura D, yeah, I mentioned this above…William might have thought it was a “cute” question and that the child was asking because he’s a prince/future king, when in reality, we all know it’s because the donation was so small that even a child knew it.
If he realized why the kid asked, he might not have been able to hide his anger.
“Turning to financial results, this year’s distributable surplus for the Duchy of Cornwall estate was £24m, increased from £23m last year.” (Duchy of Cornwall Integrated Annual Report for 2023; June 29, 2023) Approximate 1.24 USD / ￡1 ≃ $29.76M, or 4X the annual income stated in article
Yep. And shouldn’t PW, as the supposed owner of the duchy know that information? Hopefully, this child and his peers will continue to question monarchy finances.
I was just coming on to say this. PW’s annual Duchy income is considerably more than $7m – that figure was for a partial financial year due to the Queen’s death (i.e. PW got access to the Duchy cash when the Queen died which was part way through a financial year – income for a full financial year is in excess of £20m).
Can someone more knowledgeable than I am point out everything that William *doesn’t* have to pay for annually?
He doesn’t have housing costs, correct? And since his homes are all on properties owned by the crown, he probably doesn’t have to pay for landscaping, etc. W&K paid for their own renovations/furniture/etc., but that’s probably it, right?
And regarding security…Chuck is going to have Windsor’s security — the entire perimeter— paid regardless of whether every building is occupied, no? E.g. it doesn’t matter that nobody is currently living in Frogmore, it’s on private Windsor property. Same with KP and Sandringham.
I assume that W&K pay for their personal RPOs wherever they’re in residence (?), but even that might be covered by the crown since William and George are the heirs? idk.
He doesn’t pay taxes. Does he have to pay personally for the Range Rovers and all of the security upgrades they need (plus fuel), and then personally pay his drivers? I’m unsure about how costs are allocated, and don’t know if things like chefs/food and upkeep/fuel for his helicopters are coming out of his pocket.
Maybe he needs to pay for a chef and groceries for Adelaide, but if it’s true that he’s staying at Windsor Castle— or helicoptering back to KP each night— they would already be fully staffed, right? I’m realizing how clueless I am, lol.
The only things that I know for sure that he pays for — because it’s been discussed here— are his (and Kate’s, and the kids’) clothes, and the children’s tuition. Oh, and the nannies’ salaries. Plus anything that he gave the Middletons.
But there are probably so many basic things that we peasants have to pay for ourselves that are already covered by the taxpayers for W&K that they simply never even need to think about.
Not sure how William should’ve answered that question but saying I don’t know feels like a privileged answer. Like he has so much that he doesn’t even know the exact number😂 But it’s not like he can say any true number so again not sure what he could’ve said here.
He could say “I have millions. Thank your parents for their contribution in supporting me.”
He could have asked the boy to guess how much money he thought he had and make a joke with the answer. Some people have the charisma and humour to politely dodge those type of questions but his PR dropped the ball there.
I’m surprised that after the last outing when he was asked how old he is he would have had his aides tell the people at future events to not let the children ask questions.
The problem is (as always), he and Kate are the youngest senior royals! They get to control the photographers, the reporters, and almost everything else, but if they want to get any attention, they can’t stop the kids from asking!
Speaking as a parent myself, I hope that William’s staff ask some adorable children to make and present the heir with some portraits of himself and what they think he does done by 4-6 year olds, because that was more brutal than any performance evaluation I have ever been through😂
@Jay 🤣
Many of us UK citizens are disgusted by the RF’s greed and that they live outside the rules which apply to the rest of us, mainly so they can keep coining it at our expense. It makes everything they do look hollow; this money is a drop in the ocean in comparison to (just alone) their tax evasion over the years. And we don’t even know if PW is personally contributing anything.
Also: is it just me, or does PW never seem to really smile? That his ‘smiles’ are just grimaces that never seem to reach his eyes?
I feel like we could probably count the number of photos in which he has a ‘genuine’ smile on our hands. You’re totally right that he usually looks like he’s grimacing. Even on his wedding day, I don’t think he looked truly happy.
He always looks somewhat irritated and resentful that he needs to pose for photos at all (unless it’s with someone he deems “important”).
If you’re interested in learning more about the issues that lack of oversight is likely hiding read up on the Waringo investigation/report from the Luxembourg royal court. The government did an audit on HR and financial practices and identified a number of problematic practices that I highly suspect the BRF are also gulity of
His new dresser likes putting him in darker suits that aren’t as great for his coloring. It makes his facial features disappear into the fleshy tone of his skin when he’s walking outside. The indoor pictures seem to have been taken in a way to include black/ dark objects close to his head to balance that out. Or with more contrast.
Too bad W was never going to answer the question about his bank account. Hopefully there will be parents who pump their kids full of questions to ask him in the future (like why not donate large sums of money at once), because the kids are getting access to ask him questions that adults are not.
The kid did a better job in one sentence than the rr ever did in a million fawning and dishonest sentences.
Yep. A real question for once and he didn’t even answer it.
His hair isn’t “disappearing”. It’s long gone. I predict William will stop doing these events where he’s expected to interact with children. Kids are just so brutally honest.
I think he had a pretty good, deprecating answer here about not being qualified to give hair advice. But given his most recent attempts at making himself into a sexy heartthrob, I believe it pains him greatly. And I’m okay with that!
Yeah, his answer re: the hair was really the best he could have done there!
It’s rare that he’s self-deprecating, so it actually comes across as sincere, unlike most of the drivel that comes out of his mouth.
Give that kid a medal because he seems to be the only one asking the right questions.
This RF pantomime has to end and the kids seem like the only ones honest enough not to go along with the clownery.
Well William gives off creepy Scrooge vibes so the kid probably picked up on that and figured there’s money hidden away somewhere, lol.
It’s a funny story and a nice thought, but I really don’t think this kid was making a political statement about the RF’s imperial coffers. A kid can assume that a prince will be rich and that the money will be in a bank, but that’s about it.
I feel that William’s response could have been more nimble than just, “I don’t know,” but I don’t know if he even has a bank account in the way ordinary people do – that is, with his name on it and with him making personal payments from it.
Yes. If he had any sense whatsoever (which we know he doesn’t), he could have tried (or been briefed by his staff, if this came up) to make some comment on social inequalities. Like: I’m really fortunate that I’m financially secure but so many people are struggling in the areas of (name the charity focus) and that’s why we’re donating £££ to help support families through these difficult times.
Or SOMETHING! He’s just so stupid, doesn’t prepare ahead of time, and can’t think of anything not wrapped in an insult or racism (like the food delivery guy being searched because he was a POC) to say off the cuff.
He’s just so awful.
Exactly this! I commented on the post about Meghan about how prepared she is – not with prepared speeches, but with being aware of where she is, why she’s there, the purpose of the event, who is in the room. Once you’ve gotten yourself oriented and in the zone, then off the cuff remarks will be easier and not random.
@Eurydice, you’re not wrong, but that’s just not who William is. He doesn’t care. He believes his mere presence is more than enough of a gift to the peasants.
Years later, I *still* can’t believe he publicly admitted that he didn’t read the briefing papers his staff had prepared for him before an engagement, so he was unaware that Diana had once visited (or possibly “opened?”) the same place. That was beyond insulting to so many different people, and he said it so casually.
Yes to all the scathing comments about his finances.
I would like to add that it’s interesting the Torygraph is commenting on his refusal to join in the hair exercise and then:
“He also briefly joined a game of pool and produced groans from the watching guests when he twice failed to pot a yellow ball.”
Briefly.
So he didn’t engage long enough to actually have a game (giving up when he couldn’t do what he was trying to do). How long was he there overall? Twenty minutes?
“William gets an annual income of around $7.5 million from the duchy.”
Interesting, considering Harry was having to shop the bargain bins at their version of TJ Maxx. Truly ‘The Prince and the Pauper’ scenario until Harry left. No wonder Harry has major family issues.
Not only that, the 7.5 million was for September-December 2022. He became entitled to the Duchy money when the queen died but since she died late in the year he only received payments for those 4 months. His regular, full year payments will be approx. 24,000,000.
So once again, the RR are lying their faces off.
He may have more money that he’ll ever be able to count, but wow, Pegs the 57yo Penis with Teeth is suuuuuch a loser!!! Giving 100k to multiple charities over multiple years is basically useless. Pegs looks both uncomfortable (that frightening rictus smile!) and also like he’s trying to be intimidating by standing over the kids on the couch. Sit down, you rude ass.
Peg staffers, I beg of you, please keep sending him to events with children. Please let him continue to be asked these kinds of questions or told that he looks like a grandpa. I love this for him. More, more!
In that picture of him standing over the kids, he comes off looking almost menacing, somehow.
IDK if it necessarily *felt* that way to the kids in person, but the photos are…not good
As I said above, these events with kids will soon be history. They do tend to go off the rails from William’s point of view.
I feel like these children are trolling him. Kids are smart and VERY aware of what’s going on. They know Wills is a jacka$$.
These children also hear their parents talk. The walls have ears, my granny used to say when they discussed private family gossip. Of course we overheard and put 2+2 together as these children have also done it appears.
Whenever I overheard something as a child and asked about it, my mother used to say, “Little pitchers have big ears.” 😆
Yup, I was just thinking of that little boy’s parents and the absolute state their faces must’ve been when they were told “your son asked the Prince of Wales how much money was in his bank account.” LMFAO absolutely hilarious but also instant panic like “…you didn’t tell the PoW the special names mummy and daddy use for his family in the privacy of our own home, did you little one????” lol
Yup, which is exactly what I meant about them being VERY aware. Kids hear EVERYTHING – they listen to what the adults around them talk about. And I can guarantee his parents have talked $hit about Will at some point lol.
Someone give that boy the George Orwell Memorial Prize please. He’s asking the real questions the rest of the media are too scared to ask.
One of these days one kid is going to say something about his hair and there will be no coming back from it.
I will go to my grave curious as to why he didn’t nip his hair situation in the bud as soon as it started thinning. One of life’s great mysteries.
Same. When you have that much money surely you can do something about it.
Ahhh Billy, the grift that keeps on grifting!
Of course he doesn’t know how much he has in his BANK account, because the lad wasn’t specific enough. He should have asked how much cash do you have in your Cornish account or your London account or your Welsh account or your offshore accounts or your very, very secret account, or your new account in Singapore! he should have asked, “hey willy, what about those Panama papers, which account is yours?? And please Billy, don’t play snooker or pool again, you won’t like it if they try and pocket the pink 😂😂😂
“Full Lurch”. ROFLMAO. I will NEVER EVER be able to unsee this.
Hey! Lurch had much better posture than Prince William!
More personality, too.
Ha, rich people never speak about how much money they have!
I would love it if this cheeky kid was secretly trying to get William to play him at pool and earn some cash. “Oh, you don’t know how much you have? Well, then, you won’t miss it! Double or nothing, I’ve never played before, though…”
His answer: “All that I can steal.”
All that money and he can’t buy teeth-whitener and a decent pair of trousers.
Or a proper wig for his wife.