Kristen Stewart in the safety pin Balmain dress: cute or rage-inducing?

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Kristen Stewart’s face is going to drive me to drink. Within the first hour, I saw too, too much of her little troll-face, rolling her eyes, slumped over in her chair, forcing the awkwardness. But I’ll give her some credit – while she’s not good at sitting through an awards show without rolling her eyes and acting like an immature 11-year-old, she’s getting much better at the red carpet stuff. In photos from the red carpet, Kristen actually smiles in some frames, she stands up straight (sort of), and she puts in a little effort at acting like she’s happy to be there. As for the fashion – this dress is “the safety pin Balmain dress”. Very short! K-Stew loves her mini-skirts, and she loves her metallics and metal embellishments, and it’s nice to her in red. It’s a cute dress, totally appropriate for the occasion, but skirts this short always give me anxiety. I worry about these young starlets and whether their biscuits will get cold.

Since I don’t want to devote another post to it, let’s just power through all of the Twihard stuff now, okay? As I put up last night, there’s a new trailer for Breaking Dawn, and it involves thrusting and wood splinters (and bad acting). In addition to introducing the new clip, the Twilight people took home five awards: Best Kiss, Best Fight, Best Movie, and Best Male and Female Performances for K-Stew and Sparkles. I saw Sparkles accept three awards – best performance, where he got up there solo, seemed rather charming and low-key, and then Best Fight, where he was up there with Bryce Dallas Howard and he made a crack about her being pregnant now. Cutaway to K-Stew who gasped, hunched over and rolled her eyes. Hand to God.

But my favorite moment was when K-Stew and Sparkles won Best Kiss and instead of doing their patented BS “we won’t kiss on demand” stuff that they’ve done for the past two years, Sparkles ran out into the audience to make out with Taylor Lautner. Now… I think Lainey has it right about Lautner. He’s a mini-Tom Cruise, in every way. Lautner’s forced wholesomeness is its own kind of kinky, and one of the funniest stories Sparkles ever told was about having to grab a shirtless Lautner in a scene, and Lautner’s nipples getting hard. So, was Sparkles just having a bit of fun with Lautner’s homoerotic crush? Is it cruel? Or is it just kind of sweet and funny? Sparkles won me over when he kissed Taylor’s forehead and his hand. Sweet boys.

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80 Responses to “Kristen Stewart in the safety pin Balmain dress: cute or rage-inducing?”

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  1. shockedandappalled says:

    That’s a GREAT dress. Love it.

  2. You don't say says:

    Is her bra showing on her upper right side or is the top black? Her legs have no shape.

  3. perry says:

    She should stop cars at the road and offer her services. Also cover those ugly chicken legs for once, they aren’t toned and no one wants to see your vagina.

  4. embertine says:

    She has lovely skin and this dress is great on her and seems very in tune with her style. Now I need to stop looking at the pics because her terrible posture is making a red mist descend across my vision and I’m at risk of turning into my grandma.

  5. OtherChris says:

    She looks adorable and I’m not even a fan. In fact, I think those Twilight movies are horrible and she’s a crap actress, but she looks cute. Great hair, too.

  6. lucy2 says:

    I think it would look great on someone who knew how to wear it.

  7. mia girl says:

    This dress is all kinds of amazing. She looks great.

    Pattinson kissing Lautner was adorable. I think Lautner actually blushed.

  8. LL says:

    Is she really that awkward? Or was she just acting that way???

  9. almond says:

    Great hair; looks clean and healthy, and the colour is rich. I’ve always liked her legs. They have a very nice shape and they seem to go on for miles.

    Her posture is cringe-worthy, though. You can tell she does not enjoy being there. Oh, the dress definitely falls under her general red carpet style.

  10. tracking says:

    I too wish she’d work on her posture, but outstanding dress and lovely figure. LOL about ‘biscuits getting cold’!

  11. Abby says:

    Sparkles and Lautner–that was cute. :-)

  12. serena says:

    Woah, it was a really cute and funny scene! I just love Robert and Taylor -sigh-.. K-Stew’s dress was kind of cool but too short, really, and she has very thin legs (too much!), hope she does put some weight on.

  13. Quest says:

    K-Stew looks uncomfortable and awkward, did not need a bra shot, even during the award show. Why did she change to sneakers during the award show? So tacky

    Loving the Taylor/Patz epic bromance going on…Taylor was blushing hard. Luv it

  14. TXCinderella says:

    I love the dress. It is cool and edgy. Thank goodness her hair has grown out. She cut it off for that horrid film The Runaways. Dakota Fanning was the only highlight of that film.

  15. Jen34 says:

    She looks like Lisa Marie Presley, but more awkward. I don’t get her appeal. I think the dress is great, though.

  16. Shay says:

    It suits her cranky bitch-face facial expressions, but I’d say that punk went out in the Seventies…

  17. MarenGermany says:

    love her whole look. the dress rocks!!

  18. Nanea says:

    When I think of safety pins, I think of Elizabeth Hurley or the Sex Pistols.

    This here – not so much. Don’t those Twihards have people on the film sets or anywhere who could teach them how to stand up straight?

    How much longer until part II is released and there will finally be the big Breaking Up?

  19. Lola says:

    I just can’t say anything bad about her. How can you rag on someon as shy and awkward as Kstew? it’s just cruel now.

    Also i love Rob

  20. Kate says:

    I think she’s doing a lot better at events. I like the style and she knows how to wear a mini dress since she’s never flashed anyone, accidently or otherwise.

  21. Blue says:

    Ughh her posture is so aggravating. Is it really that hard to stand up straight. I really lol’d @ biscuits getting cold

  22. geekychic says:

    @Kate: co-sign everything you said.

  23. Jessica says:

    This is a horrible dress and everyone knows it!!! I’ll give K-Stew credit that she’s not as hunched over as she usually is and she actually has somewhat of a smile. But that’s about it! This dress looks tacky and cheap. I don’t see what you all see, all I see is K-Stew throwing on some red hot knee high boots and standing at the nearest street corner.

  24. Ari says:

    I love shipping pattinson and lautner so that fake kiss totally made my morning since i missed the actual awards – she looks totally cute.

  25. kwoww says:

    love the dress…looks like she did her own hair and makeup..she’s got this whole i-just-got-fucked-in-the-back-of-a-limo look.

  26. Bf says:

    Once again Miss I’m-too- good- for-you-but-my-PR people-told-me-to-attend dresses like a hooker, exposing those stick doughy legs, dirty hair, and looks high as kite.

  27. harfang says:

    It doesn’t visually “claim” to actually be punk, which I like. It’s super glamorous and badass at the same time. I don’t even care that her strapless bra is a little big for it. She looks incredible, and she’s gonna take over the world as soon as she gets free of this stupid Twicrap, and you can all kiss her ass and mine if you think otherwise. (pant, pant) OK, I’ll try not to do that again, sorry <3

  28. hairball says:

    “or rage inducing” ha ha

  29. 4Real says:

    I think maybe the dress would look a lot better on a girl.

  30. the original bellaluna says:

    Are all these starlets’ poor posture due to the fact that they’re hunching over because they’re so hungry?

  31. beth says:

    cute. nice to see her almost-smile.

  32. RocketMerry says:

    She looks so good in red. Good girl.
    Maybe she’s that happy ’cause this year’s twi-movie is the final one, God bless her.

  33. joe says:

    I love the smile with a touch of attitude, but I wish the hair was pulled back. SHE LOOS AMAZINGGGGGGGGGGGG

  34. anons says:

    they’re cute. and young. it seems she tries to promote an air of not caring, but in reality she ends up coming across as completely awkward. and seeing her in that dress, all i can think is she’s trying way too hard to be cool.

  35. Mingy says:

    She looks GOOOOOODD..looks like she’s not so shy shy anymore.

  36. Esmom says:

    “Rage-inducing,” that cracked me up. She’s thin but doesn’t look remotely healthy. I had a roommate in college with the same legs/body…naturally thin but zero muscle tone, same skin tone. She used to joke that a grossly huge person was waiting to emerge unless she changed her unhealthy ways and started exercising.

    Methinks K Stew could also benefit from some pre-emptive maintenance.

  37. Ron says:

    The dress is fantabulous. And she didn;t junk it up with bad accessories or shoes. Love it.

  38. maggie says:

    Don’t even get me started on this bitch. The dress has no shape, and it looks like a shit covered fruit roll-up.

  39. anti says:

    now i see why she doesn’t smile.

    love the dress.

  40. foozy says:

    love her. great actress. she looks amazing in these pics

  41. geekychic says:

    @ harfang i love your comment.
    and a side note (which actually made me comment this time): i LOVE LOVE your avatar!!!! ;)

  42. Malia says:

    she’s a beautiful girl and when she smiles you get to see it. She needs to do more of the smiley thing. And she pulls off the look nicely, she looks a lot better with a little edge to ehr look, when she does beauty pageant pretty she looks awkward. Loved that Rob kissed Taylor instead, hilarious.

  43. Ria says:

    I don’t think she’s comfortable in this short a dress but DAMN she looks good (and it pains me to say that as she’s so angsty…)

  44. Denise says:

    I have to say — a person’s personality can make or break an outfit
    when she smiles, she makes the dress cuter — wierd huh ?

  45. Lindy says:

    Holy wow, she is RAWKING that dress. I think I would sell my firstborn child to look like that for a night. I know I’m in the minority, but I am actually liking her more and more. (I know, I know, don’t hate me, please:)

  46. MMF says:

    She has the worst posture I’ve seen on the red carpet. My grandmother would walk up behind her, grab her by both shoulders and yank the snot out of her.
    It worked for me.
    Big ankles too.

  47. Delta Juliet says:

    I unfortunately watched the last half or so of the awards show. Her attitude is SUCH a turn-off. I don’t know how she can have so many fans when most of her comments and facial expressions make it seem like she thinks her fans are stupid. Have a little graciousness girl.

  48. Micki says:

    Suits her MUCH better than some of the rags she’s worn on such events.

  49. lolalola says:

    Wow, awful legs. I quite like the dress but how do you sit down in it without the studs poking you?

  50. Amanda G says:

    Her hair has grown back quite nicely. Assuming it’s hers.

    If those two really are a couple they have the least amount of chemistry I’ve ever seen.

    And why is she wearing ratty old sneakers with a dress (in the clip)? Ugh. Just ugh.

  51. Isa says:

    I freaking love that dress.

    But her legs still remind me of a baby deer. Long doesn’t necessarily mean good.

  52. Madison says:

    Cute she looks really good, the dress, the hair, the shoes and she even managed to smile.

  53. Toni says:

    Nerdy little blogger post your picture because I’m sure you are amazing looking. lmao.

    Seriously the comments and your post are hilarious because it’s just jealousy. Lets break down a 21yr old, it doesn’t make you cool or smart it makes you laughable.

    Poor little nerdy blogger. :(

  54. Charlotte says:

    I love that dress! I’d sooooo wear that. Totally my style!

  55. loveyourwork says:

    Kristen is the shit! she looked so hot last night and I loved the fact that she didn’t give a f and wore her sneakers on stage. She is true to herself and that makes her incredible, regardless.

  56. Leslie says:

    Someone needs to teach this girl to stand up straight and quit slouching with her shoulders.

  57. Heatherrr says:

    Still dont get the hate. Seems harmless to me.

    Dress looks great.

  58. Maritza says:

    The dress looks great on her, I wish she would learn to stand up straight and stop the eye rolling.

  59. Karina says:

    Personally I think this dress is too short. While I love the pins (it suits her edgy attitude)I DON’T love the black strapless bra peeking up on 2 sides of the outfit.Would’ve chosen a different dress or at least a matching bra!

  60. dr.bombay says:

    I don’t think much of kstew or her “acting”, but I do think the dress is hot.

  61. Stephanie says:

    Does anyone else think she looks unhappy? Is that just me? She always looks like she’s on her way to have a colonoscopy or something equally awful when she’s photograpphed. A pretty smile and demeanor would really do her a lot of good.

  62. the original bellaluna says:

    @ Ron – I think I love you just for using the word “fantabulous.” How many others love (and regularly use in conversation) that word?

  63. Boo says:

    I don’t buy any of this, “Oh, I’m so uncomfortable! This is –and I am–so awkward!” crap from her. This girl spends 10 hours a day as the center of attention–every eye and every camera is on her, from makeup artists to directors to lighting people to costumers to other actors…she manages JUST FINE. It’s a persona she is putting on, and it stopped being convincing 2 years ago. Grow up, KStew, and start acting the part (though, with her acting skills, it could be dicey).

  64. the original bellaluna says:

    @ MMF – My Mama used to tell me “A lady’s head doesn’t bounce when she walks. When you go down the stairs: keep your head high*, your shoulders back, and DO NOT BOUNCE.” God love my Mama! I’m already tall (hence the urge to slouch and hunch my shoulders) but she was NOT HAVING IT! She used to put a book on my head and tell me to walk (however far) without it bobbling or falling off.

    THAT’S POSTURE!

    *”But don’t look down your nose at people; that’s rude.”

  65. Catherine says:

    Interesting dress. I still don’t understand her appeal.

  66. Ashley Temple says:

    why the fuck did KStew change into flip flops?! truly heinous….

  67. MariPily says:

    I like that she remains true to who she is. Call it awkward, call it uncomfortable, call it socially inept…it’s who SHE is. Not everyone is going to be a plastic Barbie doll with a super wide grin, twirling down the red carpet, blowing kisses like an idiot. Respect that some actors are different. I’ve said it time and again, no one would give a crap about her slouchy posture and awkwardness if she were a dude. She’s no different than John Cusack, or Dustin Hoffman, in her introversion. And who the hell cares about posture anyway? That’s sounds so 1951.

    IMO, her acting is just fine for the roles she chooses. I’d understand the jabs at her acting skills if she were starring in rom-coms…but she seems to choose roles that fit her subdued personality.

  68. jemshoes says:

    Kristen’s x-factor goes up by 100 points when she deigns to smile and stand up straight. For those of us still waiting for her to grow up, her passive-aggressive behaviour with the media can be a little exasperating.

    But she’s stunning in this dress. :)

  69. Trashaddict says:

    She looks pretty in the dress, but NEVER do that idiotic thumbs up sign again! But, all the pins – must be a pain the ass to sit down in?

  70. Jag says:

    She’s like Posh Spice in that when they both smile, they’re completely different people. The dress is ill-fitting on top and is too short.

  71. Lea says:

    I think Miley Cyrus has the WORST posture. Kristen is just a little shy and there is a lot of pressure on her.

  72. sweet candy says:

    god, this is very amazing dress.

    who can pull out beautifully this dress except kristen stewart,LOL

    Love her dress and her make up, and she’s seem very happy.

  73. Miss Thang says:

    She should have taken notes on Resse’s acceptance speech.

  74. Camille says:

    She looks gorgeous, love it.

    She has the body/legs for tiny mini dresses, plus its age appropriate.

  75. sandy says:

    wow who knew this girl could be so pretty. She looked happy in these pics and it’s refreshing to see. Beautiful face and pretty hair. I wish she would learn how to pose but it’s not that bad though. She looks lovely when she smiles.

  76. shoesession says:

    that leg is ok to have a heeljob fetish with that heel