Kate Moss on leaving Johnny Depp: “Nightmare. Years of crying. Oh, the tears!”

Kate Moss

Kate Moss covers the December issue of Vanity Fair, and we’ve already discussed a few of the early excerpts that leaked concerning Kate’s claim that she never did heroin and wasn’t anorexic. Now VF has released a few photos and much more of the interview, and I have to say that I am surprised at how much Kate is revealing here. While she is pushing her massive coffee table book, Kate: The Kate Moss Book, it’s still quite odd that Kate feels the need to “tell all” in a sense. She’s never been one to be interviewed (I think the first in-depth talk she gave was when pushing the first installment of her Topshop line several years ago), and I figure she harbors plenty of scandalous secrets that she’ll take to her grave. So it’s strange that she’s talking about her feelings for Johnny Depp here at all beyond a cursory surface sentence. Here are some excerpts:

Staying in character: “I don’t want to be myself, ever. I’m terrible at a snapshot. Terrible. I blink all the time. I’ve got facial Tourette’s. Unless I’m working and in that zone, I’m not very good at pictures, really. On my wedding day, I’m like freaking out, obviously. ‘You’ve got to give me a character.’ And [John Galliano] said, ‘You have a secret–you are the last of the English roses. Hide under that veil. When he lifts it, he’s going to see your wanton past!’”

Regrets over her 1992 Calvin Klein shoot: “I had a nervous breakdown when I was 17 or 18, when I had to go and work with Marky Mark and Herb Ritts. It didn’t feel like me at all. I felt really bad about straddling this buff guy. I didn’t like it. I couldn’t get out of bed for two weeks. I thought I was going to die. I went to the doctor, and he said, ‘I’ll give you some Valium,’ and Francesca Sorrenti, thank God, said, ‘You’re not taking that.’ It was just anxiety. Nobody takes care of you mentally. It was just really weird–a stretch limo coming to pick you up from work. I didn’t like it. But it was work, and I had to do it.”

On being shot by Corinne Day for The Face: “I see a 16-year-old now, and to ask her to take her clothes off would feel really weird. But they were like, If you don’t do it, then we’re not going to book you again. So I’d lock myself in the toilet and cry and then come out and do it. I never felt very comfortable about it. There’s a lot of boobs. I hated my boobs! Because I was flat-chested. And I had a big mole on one. That picture of me running down the beach–I’ll never forget doing that, because I made the hairdresser, who was the only man on the shoot, turn his back.”

More on “heroin chic”: “I had never even taken heroin–it was nothing to do with me at all. I think Corrine–she wasn’t on heroin but always loved that Lou Reed song, that whole glamorizing the squat, white-and-black and sparse and thin, and girls with dark eyes. She loved that look. I was thin, but that’s because I was doing shows, working really hard. At that time, I was staying at a B and B in Milan, and you’d get home from work and there was no food. You’d get to work in the morning, there was no food. Nobody took you out for lunch when I started. Carla Bruni took me out for lunch once. She was really nice. Otherwise, you don’t get fed. But I was never anorexic. They knew it wasn’t true–otherwise I wouldn’t be able to work.”

On Johnny Depp: “There’s nobody that’s ever really been able to take care of me. Johnny did for a bit. I believed what he said. Like if I said, ‘What do I do?,’ he’d tell me. And that’s what I missed when I left. I really lost that gauge of somebody I could trust. Nightmare. Years and years of crying. Oh, the tears!”

On the tamer life: “I don’t really go to clubs anymore. I’m actually quite settled. Living in Highgate with my dog and my husband and my daughter! I’m not a hell-raiser. But don’t burst the bubble. Behind closed doors, for sure I’m a hell-raiser.”

[From Vanity Fair]

That part about Johnny is interesting, isn’t it? I wonder what husband Jamie Hince thinks of her answers. I’ve always thought that Kate was still (to this date) kind of hung up on him (or rather, the old Johnny), and she even admitted (in passing) during a Dazed & Confused interview in the late 1990s that she had never gotten over him after several years. Oddly enough, that interview was with Jefferson Hack, with whom Moss went on to have a relationship with and to spawn daughter Lila Grace. So maybe guys who date Kate Moss have always realized that they’ll never top Johnny, and they don’t mind. If you ask me (and you clearly haven’t), Kate totally dodged a bullet when she left Johnny. She didn’t have to be the one who dealt with his ridiculous mid-life crisis.

By the way, this is a very Bridget Bardot-inspired photoshoot. Does Kate pull it off?

Kate Moss

Photos courtesy of Vanity Fair

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137 Responses to “Kate Moss on leaving Johnny Depp: “Nightmare. Years of crying. Oh, the tears!””

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  1. Jennika says:

    I thought this was a picture of Blohan in the front section lol

  2. atorontogal says:

    I doubt I’d get over being with Johnny either…sigh

  3. Annie says:

    Young Johnny Depp was a legitimate heart breaker. You have to just wonder what mind of lover and man he is… Winona had a nervous breakdown after they broke up, and I don’t think she ever found someone like him ever again. She seems to be alone all the time.
    Kate and Johnny were great together, in their way, and there’s been speculation that he always wanted to go back to her but then he knocked up Vanessa and stayed and formed a family.

    How you find Pete Doherty attractive when you had Johnny at his peak?

  4. Karen says:

    Johnny is not having a “ridiculous mid-life crisis.” He’s doing just fine, thank you. Getting tired of Vanessa Paradis does not equal a “crisis.” He’s busy with his career and seems much more at easy and happy since he dropped the French baggage.

  5. HotPockets says:

    She seems like an unhappy person who is reflecting on all the mistakes and devaluing points in her career.This interview seems like she is saying that nobody in the industry genuinely cares about you and all she wanted was someone to take her out to dinner or care for her, which is slightly depressing. Oh, the life of a top model, it just seems destructive to the soul.

    • RocketMerry says:

      I agree.
      Also, she comes across like a somewhat unstable soul, one that is never quite sure of things and is always looking for certainty. She speaks as if she really did (and does!) not have a clue as to how to be herself. You don’t meet that many people like that, and they are usually heartbreakingly “pure in essence”, if I might get a bit fancy.
      She must have felt throughtly confused and uncertain of things in the past, I hope she’s found a way to be more balanced and secure.

      • HotPockets says:

        I agree, she does seem very uncertain and insecure, but I think the industry is such a machine that it will have that effect on anyone. I actually like Kate and I hope she has found some inner solace despite everything. There seems to be a lot of pain.

    • LAK says:

      Very few models, even the ones who make it, have happy tales to tell.

      It”s hell on a teen’s psyche to be put through that.

      It’s a horrible, terrible industry.

  6. LeeLoo says:

    After seeing the cover, I am more interested in the Truman Capote article.

    Kate Moss has always been rather dull to me. I think she was overblown as a model and she comes off as slightly vapid. She did drugs, maybe not heroin but she did use something. She was in the fashion industry, that biz runs rampant with drug use. Let’s also not forget she was a British model in the late 90s, many of them strived to look like Kate Moss. The super skinny anorexic look was what publishers and fashion moguls were looking for. Did she have a medical definition of anorexia? Probably not, she looked the way fashion magazines in Europe required her to look for her time.

    • jani says:

      +1 This is drivel being used to sell a coffee table book. I doubt that Moss said any of it without a lot of coaching. As for the denials about drug use, ” A Valium, oh heavens!”, that is pure nonsense. Cocaine Kate did plenty of drinking and drugging. Based on recent pictures that I’ve seen of her falling out of cabs after going clubbing, (Oh heavens! to that denial too), I think that she still does. She carefully avoids specifically saying the word coke, but she is simply skirting the truth. As for the heroin denials, b*tch puleeze. Does anyone really believe she didn’t at least snort or skin pop when she was with Doherty? Perhaps she is pretending that unless you inject it, it doesn’t count. Ditto to the “never anorexic” crap. If no one provides you with meals and/or snacks you buy/bring them for yourself unless, of course, you know that eating will cause you to lose your multi-million dollar career.

      She was a very young person trying to make it in a very brutal business. I’m sure that she did suffer. However, at some point, if you have any brains at all, you learn to take care of yourself. Instead, Moss always just seemed to use her waif persona to find people to rescue her. And she lived a life of extraordinarily pampered luxury, huge wealth and great public acclaim as rewards for her discomforts.

      Photogenic and good model? Yes, but really not much more than that.

      • Jo 'Mama' Besser says:

        Nothing sounds as good as denial feels.

        You can’t ‘little girl lost’ your way out a biological imperative, if she didn’t ever eat save for when Auntie Carla was around, then you weren’t eating for deliberate reasons. What you say a person who is so lacking in agency that the basic necessities of life will go unfulfilled because you expected everyone to do everything for you? If you have the presence of mind to go clubbing and order your drinks, you’ll have the tools necessarily to order a meal and unless she and all the other girls were actively being starved, some sort of craft or room service would be provided. We’re not talking about a girl who had to share an apartment with nineteen other models and wander the streets penniless, she was Kate Freaking Moss and if Kate Freaking Moss wanted someone to buy her some milk, someone would have got her the milk. It is such a brutal business and girls get mistreated and abused, but there to have to perks to being an It Girl overnight world obsession. Or are we talking about the down-to-earth and selfless supermodel cliche wherein demands of any sort are never made, expectation of underlings is realistic and humane and diva behaviour isn’t tolerated.

        I don’t bear any animosity but, okaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay Kate Moss, okkkkkaaaaaaaaaayy. Maybe you should’ve asked Johnny for some directions to a supermarket and and him teach you how to chew, swallow, use utensils and recognize the difference between real life people food and a still life on a wall.

  7. ladybert62 says:

    I have never understood her attraction. She does look like Bardot in that picture.

    Wonder what her husband thinks of these comments.

    Wonder what Mr. Depp thinks!

  8. K-MAC says:

    she looks amazing! and I love how candid she is in this interview!!! Everyone has someone that they could not get over (for years)

  9. Hannah says:

    She actually is a model that’s interesting to listen to. I read something she said about modelling a few years ago and was amazed about how thoughtful she was.

  10. DeltaJuliet says:

    Not a fan of the pictures.

    I know what she means about Johnny though. Sometimes there is just that person that your heart wants to be with, even if it’s not the best thing for you, and you haven’t been with them for years.

    Obviously, I have one too lol

  11. Christina says:

    Why is Kate breaking her career-long habit of almost never giving interviews?

    I’ve always admired Kate for adhering to the maxim that models should be seen and not heard, unlike the nobodies inanely tweeting about their baby’s nappies or some other mundanity. But maybe I’ll have to rethink that.

    BTW does anyone think Kate looks like a young Debbie Harry in these photos?

  12. V4Real says:

    I’m not feeling that wig she looks like Amanda Seyfried or Devon Aoki from Too Fast Too Furious and Sin City.

  13. Quit says:

    I think it’s highly suspicious that she is talking so much about her feelings for Johnny recently…the last week was “I WAS LUCKY TO BE WITH JOHNNY” and now that she cried years for him…

    Why now, Kate? Why now that he is the single? Is she trying to send some sort of “message” to him?

    • Milla says:

      During the cocaine scandal, Depp publicly supported her. IMO, they will always have a soft spot for each other cos they were in love, but Kate’s married now, she had 2 great loves after him, so I don’t think it is anything but reminiscing.
      I am glad she finally spoke up, she is an amazing model and not stupid or heartless as some people assume. Young models can use her experiences, because Kate did it all, both in her private and personal life.

  14. mk yarwood says:

    I’ve pegged ‘young johnny’ as the dude in the blind who shot his girlfriend by accident, which got her hooked on pain meds and led to her increasingly strange behaviour. Shoplifting, anyone?

  15. Tiffany says:

    In one of the things I can never explain, I have always been fascinated with Kate Moss. I will be buying this issue. Good job Vanity Fair.

  16. Alexa says:

    Sounds like she’s lying to me. And forget about “Johnny!!” – I want to know what the frig she was thinking when she was with Pete Doherty?

  17. This interview pissed me off. Oh boo hoo you had a stretch limo pick you up to take you tow ork and no one took you out to lunch yet you made millions of dollars off of posing for photos. Give me a break

    • Snowpea says:

      Gosh really? Are you really unable to put yourself in her shoes and remember what it’s like to be 16 years old?

      At 16, you have no life experience to say, “Hey, I’m kinda hungry. Any good places to eat around here?” You WAIT to be told when to eat. It’s that simple.

      At 16, you have no life experience so when a stretch limo picks you up, you would feel OVERWHELMED by all the attention. And not in a good way.

      Honestly, money doesn’t protect you from feeling all the normal stuff. Some people commenting here seem to think that loads of money equals immunity from the ordinary human experience.

  18. Izzy4ya says:

    All of Johnny’s women look alike.

  19. spinner says:

    I love Kate & so does the camera. I think she is opening up more as her days of iconic photo-shoots are put behind her. She is onto the next.

  20. Erin says:

    This makes me like her a lot more. I like that she was uncomfortable with those shoots and is talking about it. She was so young, i wish she had had a parent or someone else looking out for her at such an impressionable age. How do you ever forget or get over being treated like such a pretty object and not like a human being that requires things like food?

    • EmmaStoneWannabe says:

      Yeah I agree. Maybe a dumb question, but why wouldnt they have any food for the models at the shoots, shows, etc? I think they could spare to eat some fruit salad after the show at least. Not cool that the industry was (is?) encouraged starving.

      • LAK says:

        i remember a documentary years ago that had all the big models reminiscing about life on a shoot and backstage at a catwalk show and they said that the only thing provided where copious amounts of alcohol. Kate said she was always drunk at shows because someone always handed her a drink as soon as she arrived.

        BTW: a show is only 20minutes. Most of models booked are present for an hour per show depending on what other shows they have booked each day. it’s not an all day affair. So one can see why they wouldn’t provide food at shows.

        Craft services on a shoot depend on the budget. and the client. Models are seen very much as props rather than integral part of the end product unless they are big models in which case they are properly looked after and then some.

  21. Riana says:

    “‘You have a secret–you are the last of the English roses. Hide under that veil. When he lifts it, he’s going to see your wanton past!’”

    I’m sorry but bahahahahahaha!

    Are you kidding me? Lol, I can understand needing a role for picture taking (too well actually) but that line was ridiculous. I’m surprised she’s not laughing hysterically in all her photos, how corny.

    Also, these photos are kind of terrible. It makes Kate Upton look incredibly qualified.

  22. Theresa says:

    I would say that Moss has not had any cosmetic enhancement, but most of her published photos have been shopped. Though she has done a certain amount of damage to her looks through smoking, drinking and drug use, I think it’s admirable that she so far has left her face alone. Perhaps models don’t mind that their pictures are adjusted before printing, and remain realistic about what actually stares back at them in the mirror. I hope she lets herself age naturally forever, with grace and dignity. It does seem the men that she has chosen are the kind that don’t want a plastic barbie doll type, and don’t mind her a little rough around the edges.

  23. athina says:

    why do you always mention the mid life crisis when you mention johnny??whats the point of this?okay he had a mid life crisis(according to you), end of story.he is doing well now

  24. I'm going to Guam! says:

    Vanessa has moved on with some other guy so I think the break up was something they both wanted.
    Johnny doesn’t have a midlife crisis, he (as well as Vanessa) just grew apart and wanted to move on.

  25. oliveo says:

    Love her. And her book looks super gorgeous.

  26. Feisty says:

    I remember reading a quote from her years ago about how she was bawling during her topless photo shoot as a teen. For some reason I thought it was with a male photographer and she was younger (14-15), and I wondered how it wasn’t child pornography or sexual assault.

    • littlemissnaughty says:

      Really? That’s interesting because this is the first I’ve ever heard/read about her being uncomfortable during the early days. She really must’ve been good even then because you can’t tell at all from the Corinne Day shots. Sad but impressive.

      I have to say, I never cared about models giving interviews but Kate Moss? I would pre-order any memoir she would write the second I could. The things she must know about the industry and the crazy-a** people in it ….

    • annie says:

      I’m not sure if anything has changed, but I don’t think models under 18 should ever be photographed topless or naked. Reading her story about it made me feel sad – it’s clear that she was pressured into something she wasn’t at all comfortable with, which just seems like child exploitation to me. And the fact that she was paid doesn’t make it better, in fact it probably makes it worse.

  27. MARIA says:

    no wonder I’m the eternal single if being with a man is letting him take care of and make decisions for me.

    A close partnership where I get back up , ideas and advice, yes please, someone who turns me into a will less doll – no thanks

  28. Talie says:

    Gwyneth Paltrow does the same thing with Brad Pitt…the one that got away. I guess even celebs can’t help but feel that way sometimes.

  29. lrm says:

    I think she just meant when she did that particular photo shoot, she had not done heroin or tried it [at that point!] and that the photographer was fascinated by that heroin chic look.

    Notice she does not deny every doing heroin or drugs, just in the context of that shoot when she was just starting out, [or a few years into it]….

    I think she is beautiful as a model and has great style.
    She and Siena Miller, say what you will, but they have great style.

  30. Madriani's Girl says:

    “I don’t really go to clubs anymore. I’m actually quite settled.”


    In the past several months she has been photographed multiple times coming out of clubs smashed out of her mind.

  31. Kim says:

    Because she loved him but love is not enough sometimes

  32. INeedANap says:

    Is anyone else disturbed by this interview? These young models are pushed to be sexualized, to be naked, to be objectified, as if they were hard-life adults who could handle it. Who wants to do that to a teenager who can’t cope with that kind of context and exposure? It smacks of assault.

    • LAK says:

      That’s why you don’t push your child into modelling. Milan is the worst place for yong models. People assume that models have it easy but the stuff they have to put up with in order to keep working is assault. And that’s after you’ve been judged on your weight, height, physical flaws etc. They may be blessed in the looks department when compared to regular people bt it is an very ugly industry they work in.

      it’s scary to think that Kate was spotted at age 14 and immediately pt to work
      And all washed up by 20 or 21 if they hyaven’t made it big. rare is the model who makes it after that age. i think Lara stone is the only one i can think of.

    • Alexa says:

      Oh YA! That supposedly it’s necessary to use children to model clothes for women is so f*^ked up to me. I can’t believe women accept it.

  33. Jillian says:

    I recall Kate saying in an interview in the last year or two that she was not happy being that thin, and the agencies pressured her. Now she’s giving quite a different version of events.

    • LAK says:

      Many models have talked about how agencies have pressurred them, but not Kate. i think the only comment she has made in relation to her weight in past interviews was to deny the heroine chic label which wasn’t jst about the drug taking but also about being or looking anorexic

  34. Stephanie says:

    I love her! Whatever else she does, she’s always authentic. My favorite quote: “Nothing tastes as good as thin.”

  35. bns says:

    This will be the first Vanity Fair that I’ve bought in a while.

  36. scrott says:

    Interesting that on her wedding day, the photographer told her that her character was “the last of the english roses,” which is the name of a song Pete Doherty wrote about her.

  37. Bored suburbanhousewife says:

    Could someone please tell me why she left Jonny if they were so in love?

    • Jolie says:

      if I remember correctly,they wanted different things in life. Johnny wanted kids and Kate didn’t at the time(I think). they also faught too much but still parted ways on very good terms and even appeared in public events as friends.

    • I'm going to Guam! says:

      I don’t think she left him. I think he fazed her out and tried to get her to leave him (He doesn’t struck me as someone who would end it cut throat). I don’t think he ever wanted to go back to her when he met Vanessa and she got pregnant because the interviews with him before that were all about him wanting to be a father and soon and Kate didn’t want them at the time, pplus she was a party girl and he wanted to settle down and be a father. And then there was the infamous incident at the hotel room where he threw that TV out and got arrested…He was fighting with Kate.

    • LAK says:

      I remember she struggled with the break up and checked herself into the priory for unidentified issues which were rumoured to be mostly heartbreak over Johnny.

      • Bored suburbanhousewife says:


        Thanks for info everyone and thanks LAK for your kind thoughts re hurricane!

        Re Rupert as name–one of the British names like Simon & Nigel that never caught on here. Always wonder why one name m akes the crossing but not others. Colin & Oliver made it but never Rupert or Nigel.

      • Lena says:

        JD said in an interview that he and Kate weren’t good for each other. Though Kate has remained stunning, this interview didn’t indear me to Kate-she seems a bit one dimensional and using JD’s name to leverage her own. I have appreciated Vanessa Paradis interviews and her movie roles as of late. Though quirky and unconventional, Vanessa seems like someone I’d like to get to know–she seems intelligent and thoughtful. I’m not getting the same vibe from Kate.

    • Jaycee says:

      He dumped her, more or less. Let’s face it, nobody leaves someone they are truly in love with.

  38. Midnight Strutter says:

    Bardot inspired/ homage to Bardot it may be, but I don’t think she looks like her.
    Kate Moss has striking facial bone structure. Wide-apart eyes, high cheek bones, face shape…& project woman-child aura, & may have similar coloring, but definitely doesn’t look like her.
    (Nor did Claudia Schiffer for that matter.)

  39. Amy C says:

    The highlight of story is not her husband or her current life but JD relationship from 1997 or something. That is what they highlight everywhere but she sound genuine in her expression though and she was hurt by the breakup.
    This definetly puts JD in different light like he is a desireable man etc. Good for Johnny he was totally slipping with the whole mess thing lately.

  40. muppet_barbershop says:

    Brigitte, honey. And yes, I believe she pulls it off. But the open dewiness of her default facial expression gives her SO much leverage. I’m not sure she actually has to “do” anything to pull off a photo shoot influenced by another star with a similarly sexy-popular way of holding her features.

    This looks like a great interview actually. I especially love the “glamorizing the squat” quote; it’s a great giver of insight into the modeling scene at the time. I remember that sh*t and I remember real-life, pervasive heroin chic. …It’s interesting that the “tears” about Johnny were apparently only a result of losing him!…

  41. Estella says:

    She was my least favorite of the 90s supermodels. She is one of the few though that has aged surprisingly well. I don’t think this photoshoot does her current beauty justice.

  42. Justine says:

    That shoot looks weird. Weird style. Yep, doesn’t do her justice.

  43. I'm going to Guam! says:

    I like how she came to Naomi Campbell’s defense with the whole phone throwing scandal. I love that they are still friends and have been for all these years.

  44. ElizabethL says:

    I was talking to one of his personal friends and it was Johnny Depp who dumped Vanessa Paradis. This was said from the horses mouth.

  45. JohnnyFan says:

    Kate had no alternative to leave Johnny because he was having an affair with Vanessa Paradis whilst shooting a Polanski film in Paris, and the ‘bit on the side’ got pregnant within 2 months. Kate was devastated,suicidal, was taken to The Priory clinic for months. Once the bit on the side (Vanessa) was conveniently pregnant on her part, he couldn’t go back to Kate, although he would have loved to, because even stronger was his need to have a baby, and Vanessa was like a leech, he couldn’t get rid of her, until recently, when the kids were old enough to understand daddy not wanting to be with mommy.