Kate Hudson and her brother, actor Oliver (Nashville, Rules of Engagement), were raised by their mother, Goldie Hawn, and Goldie’s longterm partner, Kurt Russell. Kate and Oliver’s biological father, Bill Hudson, was out of the picture early in their lives. Bill was married to Goldie from 1976 to 1980 and has repeatedly told the press that Goldie cheated on him, that she cut him out of their children’s lives, and that Goldie replaced him as a father figure with Kurt.
In fact Bill came out with a tell-all book about Goldie and his kids in 2011. During the press tour he also trashed Kate. Despite being estranged from his daughter for decades Bill claimed that “Kate was married to Chris Robinson and then divorced him to be with Owen Wilson.” I mean the timeline fits, but it’s unclear if that’s what happened exactly, or how Bill would know when he never talks to his kids anyway.
On Father’s Day Oliver, 38, tweeted the following message to his sister about their absentee bio dad.
First of all, OMG they were cute kids! Next, I only know Oliver from Nashville, where he plays a manipulative fast-talking douchebag, so I have a hard time seeing him otherwise. I’ll just say there must be a lot of hurt and pain behind a famous person so publicly calling out their bio dad. Now that Bill Hudson has reacted, though, I really get it. Bill told The Daily Mail that Goldie “poisoned” the kids against him and that he had no chance to be in their lives once she made up her mind. He also said outright that he never wants to see them again.
In a searingly raw interview with The Mail on Sunday last night, Bill, veering between tears of sadness and flashes of anger, vowed to ‘break all ties’ with his eldest children.
‘I say to them now, ‘“I set you free,” he pronounced, his voice breaking. ‘I had five birth children but I now consider myself a father of three. I no longer recognise Oliver and Kate as my own.
‘I would ask them to stop using the Hudson name. They are no longer a part of my life. Oliver’s Instagram post was a malicious, vicious, premeditated attack. He is dead to me now. As is Kate. I am mourning their loss even though they are still walking this earth.’
‘When we split up, she never had a bad word to say about me,’ he says. ‘But when Kurt came on the scene, the narrative changed and I became the big, bad wolf. I would say to her “Goldie, why are you trashing me and saying I’m an absent father when it’s simply not the case?” and she’d laugh and go “Oh Bill, you know it makes for a better story”.’
Eventually, Bill says, the fiction became fact as first Kate, now 36, and then Oliver, 38, ‘drifted away’ from him and rejected his repeated pleas to remain part of their lives. He lays the blame at Goldie’s door. I believe the drip, drip, drip of poison which started when they were kids finally took hold,’ he says. ‘Goldie wanted to create this myth of a perfect family with Kurt and she wanted me out…
[Oliver’s post] ‘was like a dagger to the heart,’ says Bill as he sits in the sun-dappled courtyard of a hotel near his ranch home in Malibu, California. ‘It’s time for the truth to come out.’
He says Goldie used her increasing fame and financial superiority to ‘freeze’ him out.
‘I call it parental alienation. We had a custody arrangement but Goldie constantly flouted it. I’d turn up to see the kids and would discover Goldie had taken them on the private jet to her home in Colorado.
‘She gave interviews about her “wonderful” relationship with Kurt and how the kids called him “Pa”. She described me as an absent father. I’d call her and go “Goldie, how can you say that?” but she’d just reply:
“It’s a better story.” ’As Kate’s fame grew she, too, accused her father of being an absentee dad: ‘There was never a birthday card,’ she complained, to which Bill responds: ‘Rubbish! I sent birthday cards every year.
‘I ring her up every birthday, still do. The same with Oliver. I bumped into Oliver fairly recently in a supermarket in Malibu and he gave me a hug. I always thought Oliver could be the peacemaker, that somehow he would help bring our fractured family back together…’
Then, angrily, he adds: ‘She wants to be Kurt’s daughter? Well then, take his name, stop using mine…
‘If what he wanted was me out of their lives, then he’s succeeded. I don’t want to see either of my eldest children ever again. It’s over.’
It’s hard for me to take this guy at his word when he says such nasty things about his children. He basically said they’re dead to him and that he never wants to see them ever again. Maybe this is twisted logic, but that kind of shows me that even if he’s telling the truth about Goldie cutting him out of Kate and Oliver’s lives, she may have had good reason.
Here are the posts that Kate and Oliver put up for the man who raised them, Kurt Russell. Have you ever heard Kurt Russell trashing anyone like this? Of course not.
Photo credit: WENN.com, Getty Images
I don’t care what came down between Hudson and Hawn – you never say you’re kids are dead to you, you jacka**.
+1
+ 2
Completely unacceptable.
+infinity!
Right?! Bill’s response was inexcusable. My dad basically moved on with a new family after he divorced my mom and there is definitely a lot of hurt over it. I wouldn’t call him out like that on Twitter because thats stupid attention-seeking behavior. Bill’s response was just horrible though. It does make me wonder if something recently happened that Oliver decided he wanted to dredge it up publicly?
If Kate and Oliver go to such trouble to post comments about their absentee father on Father’s Day, it shows this still bothers them a great deal. Otherwise, if they were apathetic about his absence, they wouldn’t bother or care enough to do it. They all need to go their separate ways and forget about posting nasty comments. Minds have been poisoned irretrievably and there will be no solving this.
I disagree. Telling your young children that they are dead to you? That’s wrong. Telling your adult children who treat you like you are the scum of the earth and won’t acknowledge you that they are dead to you? It’s warranted. Some people have toxic (adult) children. If you can cut parents out of your life, then parents can do the same to their children.
The passive aggressive post by Oliver makes him sound programmed.
Completely agree with your comment. Some people are not good to have a relationship with… It doesn’t matter if they’re your children, siblings or whatever.
Totally agree. Toxic adult children is a topic that is rarely discussed because it is taboo. I understand why it is so taboo, but sometimes severing the relationship is warranted.
Totally with you on this. Sounds toxic and you gotta save yourself from that even if it’s your kids. But who knows what the truth really is?
If you have ever been abandoned by a parent you would completely understand these adult children’s reactions. The hurt never goes away, it gets buried and you move on but it never goes away! I’m not the biggest fan of anybody in this article but u have . Literally sobbed at this father’s reactions! Maybe it wasn’t the classy thing for Oliver to discuss but if you ever heard the terrible jokes my friend and I use to deal with our losses sometimes that’s just how you deal! I will never understand how any human could stop fighting for their children, even if what Bill said was true you don’t quit your kids! God bless them and I am glad they have people that love them but come on that is seriously abusive talk coming out of Bill Hudson’s mouth!
Completely agreed. My own dad went through something similar with his children from his first marriage; he was consistently trashed and cut out of their lives while paying child support, sending presents, trying to see them … I witnessed this myself. As adults, they came to him for nothing but money and said and did horrible things. He’s never said they’re dead to him, and he still sends gifts to his grandchildren, but he has no contact with them. They’re toxic, I don’t consider them my siblings, though I tried.
Disagree in this case. He’s gone back and forth on his relationship and would use his kids names for his benefit. They’re not dead to him. They’re alive and only beneficial when trying to humilate them and engage for self promotion.
If he wrote them off completely I would agree with you.
Thank you, FLORC.
What Bill Hudson said to Life & Style magazine about his daughter:
“Kate has a wandering eye, just like her mother. Kate grew up in an environment where her mother was this exotic, glamorous creature. It makes sense that she equates love with excitement.”
In another comment I posted downthread he did an interview with RadarOnline where he called Kate a “spoiled little brat”.
Keep in mind that this is a man who is describing a daughter that he claims to have no relationship with.
I’m surprised how many people are defending a man who seems to thrive off of the attention he receives from talking sh*t about his estranged children and ex-wife. I mean, he’s basically insinuating to the press that his daughter cheated on her first husband. What kind of “caring father” does that?
I don’t know if Goldie has done the same–maybe she has trashed Bill as well, but people are really pushing this narrative that Hudson is a caring father and his ex-wife is just some angry bitter hag who prevented him from seeing his kids. Yet his incessant interviews reveal an angry and bitter man hell-bent on mud-slinging, not a hurt father who wants to reconnect with is children.
I have to agree. It seems they are two very smug adults. If he is so bad why haven’t his other children haven’t come out to support these two if they even know them. How sad of all of them.
Kitten
Entirely agree. He sounds like a monster.
I’m wondering if those defending him do so beause they just don’t know the full story. Or they know people that are terrible children. Or they don’t like the Hudsons.
Because the facts on this man… there’s NO justification for his actions and to be so public. He’s nurturing some deep resentment.
‘Young children?’ lol Where are they?
The man was hurt – you can hear it plainly in what he’s saying. These aren’t children anymore, they are grown ups. If, as he says, he tried to be in their lives, continued to reach out, called, sent cards, even as Goldie was trashing him in the press; then, yeah, I can see where he’d be like, “i give up.”
he loved his children so much, he trashed his daughter in a bio?
sorry, no. Maybe Oliver’s post was a way of showing everyone what an a_hole of a father he is and was defending his sister
I used to think my mother talked bad about my father out of spite but as an adult I made a point of finding out myself and what she said was on point. My father talked a lot about how my mother kept us away but his actions told the truth
I used to believe that, too, until I was alienated from my 11 year-old for meeting my now husband. I had allowed the DVRO to lapse because my ex was out of my life, but my wedding announcement began a cycle of manipulation. My ex convinced my daughter that I’d chosen my fiancé over her. After 2.5 years and almost $450,000 later, she is home, in therapy, and she understands she was manipulated. I almost gave up just before the DVRO was reinstated and she was removed by the police. When she was gone, I did everything I could to let her know I loved her. I would arrange to see her: I had custody, but he had her mind, so I’d have to sit outside, wIt for him to call me out with her, I’d talk with her and give her gifts, and he’d pull her in when she’d start acting too close to me, then he’d verbally aide me in front of her. Only my attorney believed me. If see her on the street and she treated me like I was a stranger. I won her back, and she is a safe, solid 14 year-old now, but that period in my life made me, a glass half-full kind of girl, suicidal. I believe Mr. Hudson. My ex was doing things no one knew were directed at me. He has lighted me. Hudson’s story HAS NEVER CHANGED since this all began in the 80s. His story rings true to me.
Thank you! I cannot believe how many people here are jumping on Hudson. Looks like many have no idea what severe parental alienation can look like. Yes, it can be almost like “cult programming,” and your story is a perfect example. SO glad you got your daughter out of that.
sills
Hudson is trashing his family. Maybe Hawn did do this. Can he not put that aside to reunite with his children or maybe just for the sake of his grandchildren?
Or is he just so full of venom he must keep saying these awful things. And in the press?
Christine
No, Hudson’s story hasn’t really changed. He’s always been very aggressive and a bit unhinged towards Hawn after the split. And now he’s pretty much calling his daughter what he called their mother. siut
What is his end game here? Why is he continuing to do this? To just keep insulting them while they carry on with their lives and families? He seems like a cruel man I would not want my kids around.
That’s still not Kate and Oliver’s fault.
I used to believe that, too, until I was alienated from my 11 year-old for meeting my now husband. I had allowed the DVRO to lapse because my ex was out of my life, but my wedding announcement began a cycle of manipulation. My ex convinced my daughter that I’d chosen my fiancé over her. After 2.5 years and almost $450,000 later, she is home, in therapy, and she understands she was manipulated. I almost gave up just before the DVRO was reinstated and she was removed by the police. When she was gone, I did everything I could to let her know I loved her. I would arrange to see her: I had custody, but he had her mind, so I’d have to sit outside, wAit for him to come out with her, I’d talk with her and give her gifts, and he’d pull her in when she’d start acting too close to me, then he’d verbally abuse me in front of her. Only my attorney believed me- the police did not. If see her on the street and she treated me like I was a stranger. I won her back, and she is a safe, solid 14 year-old now, but that period in my life made me, a glass half-full kind of girl, suicidal. I believe Mr. Hudson. My ex was doing things no one knew were directed at me. He has lighted me. Hudson’s story HAS NEVER CHANGED since this all began in the 80s. His story rings true to me.
I can see both sides in this. Obviously there are three sides to this story. Dad’s versions, Mom and kids version and the truth. If you listen to the things my sister in law says about our family, you would think my father is the worst person on earth. When in truth my father has done everything he can to help them get a great start in life, helped them buy their first house, got my brother the great job he has etc, he is one of the most supportive and loving parents I could have ever asked for. My brother is a not assertive, and she is definitely the head of the household. I have not seen or talked to my 2 nieces and one nephew in almost two years. I have never even met my second nephew. Apparently we are dead to them.
+1
There’s a lot of pain in these exchanges, so much it hurts just reading them, but Bill Hudson’s response is inexcusable.
No matter what happened way back then, what an awful, immature and selfish thing for a parent to say to or about their children. It says a whole more about Bill as a person than it does Oliver, Kate, Goldie or anyone else – which is to say, not much. It’s typical of a narcissist, though, and maybe this means she did the right thing in protecting them from him.
This actually makes me like Kurt Russell even more, thank goodness he became their *real* father.
And it absolutely says something that Goldie was able to find a great guy to be a loving father to her two children. They all seem to really adore him.
Maybe that’s what pisses Bill Hudson off so much?
Might be unrelated to Hudson and Hawn’s split and custody battles, but didn’t he have the reputation for being a jerk while married to Cindy Williams? For some reason, I had the impression that he really pushed her to ask for more money and ultimately leave Laverne and Shirley and that his interference alienated–ironic word choice!–her coworkers on the set? Anybody remember hearing that?
Bingo! Penny Marshall on Hudson:
FOX411: The ‘Laverne and Shirley’ set was famously dysfunctional.
“PM: We did curse a lot. We weren’t cursing at each other. We were cursing at the writers. We complained a lot because we wanted better.
FOX411: You became estranged from Cindy Williams.
PM: We were not estranged during the show but then she got married. I was very happy. She was having a baby but Bill (Hudson her then husband) was a pain in the ass. He wanted to be a producer. So that’s what happened. But she was married and she thought he was being protective.”
Sounds like Williams only reconciled with Marshall after she had divorced Hudson….
http://www.foxnews.com/entertainment/2012/10/04/penny-marshall-talks-cancer-abortion-reconciling-with-laverne-shirley-co-star/
But you can go over someone’s head and spin to the press he’s an absentee dad. The guy is emotional. You might be if your ex played petty, immature tricks. I’m sorry but the Hudson kids are chips of the old blocks. How lame of the son too, for the “abandonment” thing. Clearly the father wouldn’t take it so emotionally if he really didn’t care. Sounds more like Goldie Hawn is an emotional diva. And a ridiculous one at that.
Oliver’s post was certainly asking for a response but wow that response is harsh and yes an indication that IF Goldie pushed him away, it was for a good reason. What an a–hole.
The “they are dead to me” comment is completely horrible. However, the comment Oliver made publicly about his bio dad was classless and unnecessary. I know Olivier is hurting and we all deal with the absence of bio parents differently. I understand what he is going through with my own family soap opera which is so embarrassing and I would never share publicly (mexican family drama).
I have an estranged relationship with my father, and the very first thing I learned is not to engage with him. When I have to see him, I play nice (and even then, he’ll still twist it to make me an awful person) and take the high road.
Deliberately and needlessly provoking a parent in a public forum is the height of immaturity. I don’t know what their relationship is or whose version of events is closer to the truth, but it doesn’t matter. Oliver’s closer to 40 than 14, and he should know better. Just post a nice tribute to Kurt Russell and stay quiet as to your biological father – sometimes, silence is more powerful than words.
Excellent! Given their obvious dysfunctional and painful relationship, Oliver, the grown-assed manchild, should have just NOT said anything to/about his bio father. Just honor the one who raised you (Kurt) and who you love, respect and are grateful to. Why stir up a hornet’s nest with that completely unnecessary and classless tweet?
I was around when all this went down and followed it closely and always thought it was crappy the way Goldie forced Bill Hudson out of the kids’ lives. They were programmed to be estranged from a very, very early age. I also remember him fighting for them to no avail.
Who can blame him for being bitter. He was deeply hurt and then hurt again with that childish, hateful Instagram tweet.
oh please. Kids can feel whatever they want to feel about their parents role in their lives. He FEELS abandoned and that should be acknowledged. But not only will his father not acknowledge that, he’ll REACT to it.
Please – Oliver is a grown man and there was no point of the abandonment day post but to stir up a reaction … it was so in your face. Sound like father and son are more similar than they would like to admit.
Really sad for everyone – no winners here.
I do believe there was parental alienation going on with Goldie. I have seen it in person and it is ruthless and ugly. However, his response of “your dead to me” is uncalled for.
If he truly wanted a relationship with his adult children, he should have remained silent and let them know he loved them and the door would always be open. Instead, he slammed it shut in their face.
Exactly – even if Goldie cut them off when they were kids (which is inexcusable unless he was abusive), they’re adults now and wouldn’t have her interfering. They may never respond, but he should always try to be open to them if they change their minds.
None of this should be played out in the media though. Oliver shouldn’t have made his diss public, and Bill shouldn’t have responded through the Daily Mail.
Exactly.
It might, if it’s true, take them a long time to even begin to unravel the reality of what happened between their parents and how much their Dad really wants them. It hurts but if the goal is to actually have that relationship one day then you keep yourself open and understand how much pain the children must be feeling from their perspective. Instead he did exactly what they feel he’s always done, thus only cementing the pain in their hearts.
I agree with this completely. Very sad situation all around.
That’s really sad. Especially with so many people judging without knowing exactly what happened.
I think at this point a relationship with these kids is futile. I do think Goldie withheld them from him and alienated him. Oliver’s post was mean and childish and designed to hurt his dad. Bill’s response to me is understandable. I don’t think he should have had a public response, but he sounds like someone who has finally given up. And that’s okay. The relationships seem toxic, there’s hurt on both sides, nobody’s willing to work at it. It wasn’t meant to be. It’s like dealing with an addict. You try and try to help them and then at some point it’s up to them, and you have to walk away.
I remember as well. She definitely alienated them, but he did nothing to try to fix the relationship when it could be fixed. That said I don’t really have much sympathy for Oliver & Kate. If they consider Kurt their dad, then there was no reason for Oliver to post that tweet. He did it to get a rise out of Bill Hudson and it did.
I’ve seen parental alienation with my partner and his ex and their 3 kids.
She is the one who cheated. She is the one who ignores custody and even kidnapped the kids – and the cops were like “hey it’s late and they are safe with their mom right?” I mean it amazes me how people excuse a ruthless mom just because it’s the mom. It’s entirely possible Goldie (hello she’s an actor after all) has narcissistic tendencies and wanted what she wanted and did in fact freeze him out. Plus she had the benefit of pr spin and financial advantage. We don’t know the depth of betrayal and abandonment Hudson suffered.
I’m NOT justifying his response but I DO think it’s born out of a pain deeper than people are acknowledging. Yes, it’s possible Hudson is also just an ass but it seems like a very childish tweet from Oliver and it makes you wonder if Oliver’s still trying to “justify the narrative”
I was about 11-12 years old when Hawn and Hudson got together. I remember reading about them in my mom’s Rona Barrett gossip magazines – now those were the days of celebrity gossip! Bill Hudson was a member of the musical/comedy group, the Hudson Brothers. They had a Saturday morning TV show, which was cancelled just about the time Bill and Goldie hooked up. They had a couple of Top 10 songs, but not much after that. Goldie’s fame, however, was on the ascendant, and she was definitely calling the shots in the relationship. She got pregnant fairly soon after they began dating, and, as I recall from back then, they didn’t know each other very well, and found out, too late it seems, that they had little in common. Goldie is a nonreligious Jew, while Hudson was raised in an observant Catholic home. Hudson envisioned a more traditional approach to family life, but Goldie is more of a free spirit. She is also a very assertive and take charge kind of woman, despite her image as a scatterbrain, which she most certainly is not. This, combined with the fact that she held all the cards financially, was too much for Hudson to handle. Hawn found a man who wasn’t threatened by her, and sent Bill packing. IMO, Hudson could have stayed in his children’s lives, but didn’t want to make the effort of fighting Goldie on every count. Ironically, I think Goldie would have respected him more, and consequently would have had a better relationship with her ex, if he did put up more of a fight. I think that’s how Goldie was gauging his devotion to the kids; ‘how hard is he willing to fight?’
Anyway, as in almost all divorces both parties are at fault in some way. Goldie was ruthless, Bill was a weakling.
“I think that’s how Goldie was gauging his devotion to the kids; ‘how hard is he willing to fight?” – This describes my husband’s situation with his Ex. She made it extremely difficult for him to maintain a relationship with his daughters. She was bipolar and used every one of her symptoms to full advantage. It worked too. She successfully distanced the girls from their father by convincing them he was big, bad daddy and was so mean and cruel to their mother. He eventually got sick of dealing with her drama and tried to forge his relationship with his daughters independently. She to this day says he was not devoted as a father because he wasn’t willing to fight with her to see them more. She said if he loved them he’d be willing to fight everyday. This stuff really happens to people. My husband says awful things too out of hurt and frustration. But, he never says it directly to his daughters, he just complains to me.
I don’t know too much about the Hudson/Hawn marriage but I’ve heard a lot of bad press about Bill Hudson. Garry Marshall pretty much attributed the death of Laverne and Shirley to Bill Hudson. Garry Marshall said that Cindy Williams pretty much quit right in the middle of production because Bill was her manager and was asking for a lot of money. When the producers balked, she walked. I do remember the subsequent lawsuits.
He doesn’t sound like he’s a great guy to be honest.
There’s bitter and there’s bitter. Perhaps if Hudson had taken a different path-detached (from Goldie’s games) but persistent in his love for his kids, things would be different.
I went through a bitter divorce eight years ago and my ex is a master at “hide the kids”. Fortunately, we pay lip service to the co-parenting model and live about 10 blocks apart.
So, “hide the kids” only really works on vacation. He doesn’t have them call during vacation breaks (upon arrival), which is in violation of the parenting plan. I have to assume that when they fly to visit Grandma in the Bay area or drive to Seattle through the mountain passes in winter to visit Auntie CC in Idaho (from Seattle) that they’re safe.
He will at least text now, because the last time he disappeared with them I shamed him in front of his mother, who thought he was a jerk for not keeping me posted about where my kids were.
Now we mostly text and e-mail about logistical stuff and the poison stays to a minimum.
Bottom line-keep your eye on the prize, which is your long term relationship with your kids. Bill Hudson seems to self absorbed to be able to comprehend anything that involves the long haul and not getting involved in drama (see: “They are dead to me”).
@JudyK …
I was about to post the same thing. I was around at the time as well and vividly remember Goldie systematically cutting Bill Hudson out of her children’s’ lives. He made these same accusations when Kate and Oliver were kids. Goldie said at the time that his claims were ridiculous and that he was a dead-beat dad who didn’t want to spend anytime with his kids. I remember thinking at the time that a dead-beat dad wouldn’t be so passionate in his public appeal to see his kids. At the time this was going on, Goldie had hit her professional stride and the Hudson Brothers fame had faded. I also remember thinking that if Goldie was saying this to the press, she was surely saying it to her kids as well.
This man has had 30 years of rejection from not only Goldie, but Kate and Oliver as well. Why wouldn’t he be mad and hurt?
Thanks Emma. Those kids were toddlers when their minds began to be poisoned against their dad.
I went back and reread a lot of articles about Bill Hudson, both in relation to the Goldie issues, and also his behavior with others. He was a bully and controlling in so many aspects of his life, I have no doubt that he wanted to make Goldie look bad, but had no intent to be a good father to those kids. They were an after thought.
I read that Cindy Williams and Goldie Hawn had a decent relationship, Goldie said nice things about Cindy. Oliver has a relationship with at the very least his younger half-sister Emily. I think Bill Hudson is a raging narcissist, and when he couldn’t control his ex or their kids, he threw a huge decades long temper tantrum.
I have no knowledge of Bill Hudson’s attempts to be part of his children’s lives nor Goldie’s efforts to alienate them from him. However stories about him complaining to the press that he wanted to see his children and be part of their lives… Isn’t proof that he really made that effort. I’ve sat across from a guy attempting simultaneously to avoid spending the allotted time with his son… And complaining to the mom that he “wanted to spend time with his son.” As if she was the one preventing that. It was an eye opener. Sometimes it can be about perception and control.
I grew up hearing stories about Kate and her father and he always came off as really douchebag. I also read parts of Bill’s book and was pretty shocked on how badly he came off in his own book in his attempts to slander Goldie. Seriously, he has been saying awful things publicly about Kate for years. What kind of father does that?
Kate Hudson repeats since always that Kurt Russel is her dad.
and hooray for devoted stepfathers (and mothers). what an incredible difference they can make in a kid’s life, and they’re not often recognized for it. Adore my own stepfather and would not be half the person I am if he hadn’t been a part of my life.
A good step father is an honorable man. They’re raising and loving children that aren’t theirs biologically and doing so when they’re given the title ” not the real dad.”
I have the most loving and kind step father. My father was totally out of the picture and even if he was I wouldn’t want him around my kids. My step dad has been “Pop” for the past 18 years and my kids have only benefited. They know he’s not my bio dad, but it doesn’t matter. He’s the one that fixes their bikes, that went trick or treating with them. That always kissed them on their heads to say good bye and has loved them unconditionally.
I have an huge respect and love for the men that come into the picture and happily love and support you.
This would be LeAnn Rimes’ dream come true… to be publicly acknowledged by her stepsons as “Mom” and being completely estranged from their actual Mother. Lol… sorry, carry on!
I thought Oliver’s post was needlessly harsh. Well, he got a reaction — I just hope he was prepared for it because that would sting anyone.
Agree Talie. And why are they doing this so publicly? I honestly don’t care to know about their situation and if Oliver wasn’t Goldie’s son I wouldn’t know who the h*ll he is. Wish they’d leave their dirty laundry be and sure wish I hadn’t clicked.
Yeah, no one thought this would end well. With them ALL taking shots at each other there wasn’t a chance in hell for reconciliation. Too bad it had to end this way.
Who knows? Only Goldie and Bill really. But I will say parental alienation is a real thing and lots of times the kids are not even aware of it. A good friend of mine has four children with his ex-wife. They divorced 13 years ago and over those years, she moved 7 states away, refused to put their children on the phone when he calls, changed numbers over and over. Sends birthday and Christmas gifts back to him. When he drives down there for his court-allowed visits, she sends the kids away so he can’t see them. He has gone thru bankruptcy with all the court fees, lawyer fees, and yes child support for four kids. They all hate him now. They don’t even know how much time, effort and money he has expended over the years to see them. It’s terrible.
As far as this situation with the Hudson’s, it’s sad all around. Oliver seems like a jerk for what he wrote publicly, but I can’t imagine saying “my kids are dead to me”. Heartbreaking.
You could have described what my husband went through with his ex-wife and 4 kids. Shortly after we got married, she started seeing a man in another state. She started telling the children things like, “We’re getting married and you’ll be moving to Seattle, but don’t tell your father.” That was mild compared to the “Daddy and Sherry aren’t really married (because we were not married in HER church).” “Daddy didn’t pay child support this month so I can’t buy that for you (he ALWAYS paid his full child support and was NEVER late.)” We spent almost $50,000 in legal fees battling to keep the children here. Finally we were broke and my husband agreed to let her take the kids when she got remarried. It just got worse after that. He would call to talk to the kids and if they weren’t home, he’d say, “I’ll just call back in a few hours then.” She would say, “If you call here more than once a day, I’ll file a restraining order against you and have you arrested.” He’d send cards and presents that were never received. The first Christmas they lived up there, we bought tickets for all of the kids for their visit, went to the airport and they never showed up. She refused to send them and we didn’t have the money to fight it.
So yes, parental alienation is a real thing. It’s ugly. And because of it, my husband has no relationship with the children from his first marriage, though he would NEVER say they are dead to him. He has always let them know our door is open.
This this this a thousand times this!!!!!!!
Yep. My dad’s first wife (before he married my mom) cheated on him and divorced him. My dad and the woman had a young daughter. She remarried the other guy and they moved from Ohio to Florida with the little girl. The mother made it very difficult and uncomfortable for my dad to see his daughter, although they did have a few visitations. The new husband was now being called “Dad” and my dad was referred to as “Uncle”. It eventually became to much for my dad and he signed over parental rights to the new husband, which was really what the ex and new husband wanted all along. It was probably the most painful thing he’s ever had to do. 13 years ago my dad died, after a 9 month battle with lung cancer. While he was on his deathbed the daughter wrote him a scathing letter simultaneously asking why he abandoned her and boasting of how wonderful her “daddy”, who raised her, was.
I don’t blame the daughter, of course, because her mother brainwashed her into believing it was all my father’s fault, and that he just casually decided he didn’t want to be involved anymore. I also don’t agree with Bill Hudson saying his children are dead to him, that’s a horrible thing to say. My father never once spoke an unkind word about my half sister, in fact he didn’t say anything. It was that painful for him, that he never spoke about it.
The point I’m trying to make is that sometimes vindictive mothers (and father’s) really eff things up for their kids and the other parent.
This is why I’m trying not to judge – we just don’t know what the true story is. PAS is a real thing and kids hardly know what the truth is and they build their story around what they’ve heard from the PASing parent, the conditions created by the PASing parent, and what they *think* they know (over the years). So even if the parent who has been alienated tries to reconnect after the fact and let the “kids” know what really happened when they’re adults, they won’t always accept that as the truth because they’ve lived a completely different reality – no matter the reason.
My father wasn’t there for me when I was younger (his brother and mom raised me) and he’s tried over the years to “reach out” but it’s never really consistent and not really meaningful. I wasn’t PASed, but I just don’t know him that much and he doesn’t make much of an effort either. But I wouldn’t tweet or put something like that on Facebook. He means very little to me, so I leave him alone. If he wants to call me, we’ll chat a bit, but I know who my *real* father is (my uncle) and I celebrate him for being the father I needed.
I know that there are times when I’m hurtful to my bio father – because he’s hurt me over the years – but I would never publicly shame him like that. If I did, I’d be prepared for him to distance himself from me.
BTW, I’m only speaking about this incident, because I don’t know the facts of what happened before. For all I know, they’re all douches (or has been at different times).
To me the response seems like it comes from a life time of being accused publicly of being a deadbeat parent. Then the tweet was the last straw (and a very tacky one). So it might seem out of proportion but maybe not after years of being told you never did enough. I know very little about this family but always get a less then great vibe from them (Kurt excluded).
Ditto and ditto also to excluding Kurt.
I agree. I feel really bad for Bill Hudson. Oliver’s tweet was nasty and uncalled for to start this up so publicly.
I believe Bill that Goldie alienated him from them. And if they’re going to trash him publicly, then they shouldn’t continue carrying his last name.
It’s not HIS last name. It is theirs.
This guy is such dbag.
“I would say to her ‘Goldie, why are you trashing me and saying I’m an absent father when it’s simply not the case?’ and she’d laugh and go ‘Oh Bill, you know it makes for a better story’.”
I mean come on..this just reeks of bullsh*t.
Really? I don’t know. I could see that happening.
I just cannot believe that she would be this conniving. I mean, his version of events makes it sound like she’s a sociopath.
Anyway, you know what they say: three sides to every story and all that. The truth is probably somewhere in-between. Still, it does not excuse this man writing a tell-all book and making public statements like “my kids are dead to me” or “why do they insist on taking my name?”
He just comes across as incredibly petty and vindictive to me.
It is BS kitten. He’s been making money telling the same sob story for a long time. It just seems really disingenuous to me. Not mention if this were true, why is throwing so much anger at his own kids? If true, they were conditioned by Goldie, but his kids are the ones that are dead to him now? Give me a break.
Exactly.
The truth is probably in the middle, but this guy sounds like an ass. I don’t think calling their mother a slut would endear them to him much either.
I usually agree with you, but don’t think I do this time. None of us know what happened, but I think there’s evidence to back up what he says. Maybe not to the degree he says it is, but I don’t think Goldie Hawn is blameless either.
Do I think Goldie Hawn could be a conniving bitch? You bet I do. You know why? We all can.
The woman survived and thrived in Hollywood for decades – that’s no place for sweet lambs. There’s gotta be some tough bitch in there.
We can agree to disagree.
I’m many things, Bluhare, but never would I describe myself as a “conniving bitch” nor would I ever sabotage a relationship between family members. That kind of behavior is not just “bitchy”, it’s cruel and unconscionable.
@Bridget-Being business-savvy and self-assured in a cut-throat industry is worlds away from actively destroying the relationship between your kids and their father.
The thing is, Oliver and Kate are both adults now and presumably, they have enough awareness and understanding to see things for how they really are. I doubt they were just making it up when they claimed that Hudson never called them on their birthdays and never had any real paternal role in their lives. Maybe the tell-all book was the last straw for them–exploiting their personal issues for profit doesn’t really speak of a man who wants a second chance at a relationship with his children.
They’re obviously hurt for a reason and after all this time, if they cannot forgive, maybe it’s because they find his actions unforgivable.
*shrugs*
kitten, we agree more than you think because I wouldn’t do anything to sabotage a relationship between family members either. My experience says people do quite well on their own without any help from me. But we don’t know what Goldie Hawn and Bill Hudson did is my point. I suspect that neither one would win sainthood awards here.
When I mentioned conniving bitches, I was not speaking to this particular situation. Depending on what’s at stake most of us will do what we have to do when we have to do it. And to some that will look likebeing a conniving bitch. That was my point.
Ok I see your point, Bluhare.
Admittedly, I never followed this gossip when it was happening, I was too young, but I did fall down a rabbit hole when googling Bill Hudson and I was really shocked at all the hateful things he was willing to say publicly about his ex and his children. Maybe Goldie was just as bad, but behind closed doors, but when googling Goldie’s name I came up with nothing as far as cruel or hurtful things that she’s said about Bill Hudson. I only know what I know, and from what I’ve read, this guy is a first class asshole.
I guess that’s what’s making it hard for me to be as impartial as I would normally be. Bill Hudson just seems so strikingly douchetastic.
I’m with you! I can’t believe so many people are on his side! What he said is pretty inexcusable.
It’s not ok to talk about your children like that. But that is this guy’s MO.
Part of me thinks that he just enjoys the attention.
I’m with Bill on this, totally! Goldie is the as*hole. I’ve followed this story from the beginning….and it was horrific. Goldie shut Bill out and just matter-of-factly replaced him with Kurt. As adults, both Kate and Oliver have repeatedly (and publically) raked their
real Dad through the coals…all while gushing about “Pa” Kurt. Decades of hurt….and he’s had it. Who wouldn’t?
And if he’s so awful…why the hell are they using the last name Hudson?
Any man who says something like that about his children (barring some really extreme event like them attempting to kill him or something) is a foul and repulsive human being.
You don’t have to like your kids. You don’t have to be happy with how your ex-wife portrayed you. But you NEVER tell them they’re dead to you. He’s weak and I’m guessing the truth is closer to Goldie’s side than his own.
EXACTLY!
Do the people who are rushing to his defence on this blog have children? Because if so…*shudder*
My kids could disown me and trash talk me but I STILL would NEVER say horrible things about them. Why? BECAUSE I LOVE THEM UNCONDITIONALLY! If I was kept away from them and they were programmed against me (by a cult lets say) I would be heartbroken but I would ALWAYS love them.
If he truly loved them at any point his response would have been “It hurts me that you feel that way, I have always loved you” or something. Not “STOP USING MY LAST NAME” seriously WTF! Can’t believe the number of posts rushing to his defence!
This guy seems like such a whiny d****e. WHAT A DOOOOOOOOOOSHE.
I guess everyone has a breaking point. If this is all true, I feel sorry for this man and for his two oldest who never had what they should have had.
Both sides look bad as they’re both playing this stuff out in public in such harsh ways.
The dad’s response was harsher, but i don’t think it was necessary for the photo to be hosted with that caption either ( even if it is deserved, since I don’t get the point of increasing the public’s interest in the matter if you want privacy).
Nurture over nature dude, just because you produced the sperm, doesn’t make them your kids unless you make an active effort to be part of their lives. Team Oliver & Kate.
+1. I wish more parents would realize that occupying a role in your childrens’ adult lives is a privilege, not a right. And that’s shaped by how you treated them in childhood. Team O&K all the way.
@greenieweenie – this was beautifully stated and very true!
Well said. I don’t even like Kate but I feel for her and Oliver in this situation.
Um. He is saying that he wanted to part of the lives of his children but their mother did not let him and now the children are rejecting him too. He does not sound like a perfect person but he is hardly some sperm donor.
I’m sorry but that’s bull. If my husband left me and tried to keep my kids away from me HE COULD NOT! Because I would walk on broken glass to the north pole to be with them. I would spend every last dime I had on lawyers to get shared custody (which should be default anyway if neither parent is abusive/neglectful!). How could the she keep him away??? He would have visitation rights as a father! If she travelled so that he couldn’t see them when it was his turn…that is illegal! He could have taken her to court!
People need to stop defending this loser.
“Oh, You take the low road, and I’ll take the low road.” Wait. Aren’t those the lyrics? Anyway, take it off the Internet, everybody. Your personal pain, which seems pretty raw right now, should not be weaponized. Take some time, process it, come back with perspective. Lashing out publicly at your kids, who clearly are showing hurt, even if it was as a result of brainwashing, doesn’t seem the most constructive thing to do. In fact, it is the most destructive thing to do. And it doesn’t paint you in a better light. At this point in time, everyone’s in the shade, looking like monsters.
Thank you pinky. I couldn’t agree more.
I can’t even imagine not seeing or having my children in my life.
I can’t comment further, as family dynamics are rarely what they seem to others. I hope they can find some semblance of peace.
Didn’t he wrote a book were he slandered Goldie, Kate and Oliver a few years ago? He does not seem like a good Person. I’ve read somewhere that he also doesn’t really have contact with his children from his second marriage (That says a lot about him). Instead of being angry he needs to admit to himself that he wasn’t a good father and they have the right to resent him for that. Btw i also do not understand why he is angry at Kate for something Oliver did. It’s as if he was just waiting for a reason to lash out at them.
He does have contact with his other children. His daughter with Cindy Williams has instagram and he’s on it with her, her bother, and their younger sister.
He is so angry that his son accused him of abandoning them, that he made his abandonment public and ‘official’! Wow
Seeing as he hasn’t been in their lives for decades, I doubt this makes a difference.
Also if Goldie did alienate the kids then I think Bill needs to be angry at her, not the children who don’t know any better, as far as they are concerned their father abandoned them.
Oliver and Kate are no longer children they are all adults and should know better by now and should behave like it neather should attack each other and air their privet family problems for strangers they are all disgusting.
Agreed. It’s annoying so people automatically take their side when they started up with the public nastiness. Every story has two sides.
How are they supposed to know better about a history they don’t remember or know?
I dont care about them not remembering or not knowing fact is they are Adults now and that should be enough for them to behave like it, and keep their privacy shut out of the public.
Except they didn’t “start” anything. Bill Hudson has been publicly trashing their relationship in the press for YEARS. Repeatedly. He even wrote a damn book about it.
I’m not saying that Oliver did the right thing by giving him more ammunition, but maybe he’s just sick of Bill Hudson exploiting his damaged relationship with his children to get press or to help promote his book.
That makes literally no sense.
If you’re raised to believe someone is an enemy you’re not magically gonna go, “Hey you now what?! Daddy was devoted and loved us all along!” when you hit adult hood. The feelings, memories, and evidence for them is still there. It might actually be easier if one or both parents were dead but with them both alive its ‘he said, she said’.
As much as Oliver is an adult his message read like a wounded child. His Father can be hurt, be angry, be frustrated but also be smart enough to realize you can’t slap someone in the face who doesn’t trust you and think they’ll know you love them. He SHOULD have sent back a polite and gentle message saying he knows they’re frustrated but he’s never given up on being a Father to them. Instead he spit in their face.
Parenthood doesn’t stop when your children are adults. This message only added to the evidence they have of him not caring.
then Oliver should have taken the high road and ignored him not giving him the attention his father is looking for and behave like a grown man thay are all digusting for airing their privacy to the public this way is about time they all grow up.
Why should Oliver take the “high road”? Why should he be bound to some sort of covenant of respect for a man who has consistently maligned his ex-wife and his children to the press?
How could Goldie keep him away? As a father he would have had legal visitation/custody rights. If Goldie flew the kids away when it was his turn…he could take her to court! I’m sorry but he DIDN”T TRY HARD ENOUGH!
As a mother I would do anything to see my kids. I would spend every dime I had in court if I had too. I think it’s sick how people are rushing to this dead beat dad’s defence. “Wah wah wah Goldie kept him away” HOW?!?! Did she hire militia to keep him in a jail cell? Then how was she keeping him away? He has rights as a father. He could have enforced them…he chose not to try.
My father and I aren’t exactly estranged but we go years without speaking. I feel no bitterness, though, and realize my dad does the best he can- which ain’t great, but I am adult now and cannot let “my daddy issues” interfere with my life. I would be hurt- very hurt- if he were to publicly declare that I was dead to him, but I would also dry my tears and move on with my life. Oliver is obviously very angry at his birth father. We all have our way of coping, but it is probably best Bill Hudson is out of his life so why waste any time doing something that would goad him into responding- unless you need some publicity?
Hurt is not always rational… And I would guess the tweet was mostly a reaction to some Hallmark-style comment /commercial / peer-pressure.
It was Goldie’s fault he didn’t see them? He could have taken her to court and fought for more visitation. I remember Kate talking about how he never called them for their birthdays. It sounds like he’s blaming Goldie for his own lack of parenting. How convenient. If he wanted to see his kids more, he could have fought harder. Instead, he gave up and blamed her.
His interview is terrible. He goes to the Daily Mail to blast his kids? Nice. He takes shots at both of them saying Kate’s picture with Kurt is “inappropriate” as he is her “father” and he diassaproves. I have no idea what he’s saying there but the implication is gross. Then he takes shots at Oliver saying he put up this Instagram for fame because he’s not as famous as Kate and Goldie. After that he says they are both dead to him. What a nice guy. Didn’t he write a tell-all book trashing all of them? He sounds like a classic narcissist to me. He’s never responsible for anything, always the victim, and he lashes out hard when he is called out. Great guy.
I think it ws maybe what happened to Nicole and Tom-HAlle and Gabriel too. Tom, more powerful and rich, and able to give the children all they could possibly want. The other parent would not be able to compete with that.
It sounds perfect to see/read “s/he (alienated parent) fought for the children”, but in reality it takes a big chunk of you to try to fight it legally and emotionally.
I can see that, and I have only dealt with my only brother’s alienation of my sister and me from his life.
He drifted away after he got married, my mom who loved him dearly and gave all of us everything she had economically and in every way she could, suffered because he would hardly visit, or bring the children or call. We used to visit in his city 2 hours away, but she was angry at him and sometimes she did not want to call on him, because of his indifference he said he did not have money or time, and then we would find out how he had come or passed our city to go to the beach. .
After her death, it just got worse. He won’t visit or call EVER. If I call him or visit it is like it is perfect. I have cried and cried, got angry, said I don’t have a brother anymore, all the stages. I feel ridiculous when anyone asks me about him or tells me hey, I just saw him here or there. I saw the pain my mother went trough and I can’t make myself visit or call, my sister does call, she tries, but I have a little dignity (I tell myself so).
It is very sad, but I can understand the point of a hurt person if he was alienated. It is painful, very painful.
“It sounds perfect to see/read “s/he (alienated parent) fought for the children”, but in reality it takes a big chunk of you to try to fight it legally and emotionally.”
Sooo its okay to do nothing because fighting it would be hard? I’m sorry but as a mother, no, just no. I would NEVER stop fighting to see my kids. NEVER. As a parent he would have custody rights. If she hid the kids on his turn, that is illegal he could call the cops on her (I doubt she would let it get that far…negative publicity when you are a celebrity but he would absolutely be able to call the cops).
He didn’t try. I would walk over glass to see my children. NO one could keep me a way. He is a dead beat. People need to stop giving him sympathy. He is a loser and Does not and DID Not love his kids unconditionally.
Even if my kids hated me and said horrible things about me, I would never stop loving them. “Don’t use my last name” WTF?!?!?! He’s a narcissist!
Didn’t he whine when Kate gave her first child the middle name Russell? He’s been an ass for as long as I remember.
We don’t know the whole story… But it seems to me that if he REALLY wanted a place in thier lives, he could have made it happen even if she really was being malicious. As thier biological father, he has rights. He just didn’t seem terribly motivated to push back.
I left my ex when my daughter was a baby. He was a deadbeat; he lived off me, let me support him. When the baby came along I adjusted my priorities and kicked him to the curb. Yeah he put up a fight and made a stink about it, even threatened to kidnap the child. But the fact is, once he understood the well was dry, he was GONE. Never made a single child support payment, never sent a single card. My 2nd husband is the only father my daughter has ever known.
When she was 22 and expecting her first child, she found her bio dad and went to visit him. All he did was whine about how I made life hard for him by kicking him out and blamed me, 100%, for his not being in her life. It was ALL my fault; I was to blame for everything. Meanwhile, she took note of his joblessness and how his wife was working 2 jobs…. He never did change. I made the right call.
Needless to say, my daughter understood after that why I left, and has since cut off ties with him herself.
Oh I feel so sorry for your daughter. I think kids who get left by a parent think that once they meet them later, they will be unlike what they expected and it hurts to realize your parent is very much an asshole and you were better off.
My daughter’s father walked away 3 years ago and hasn’t looked back. He stopped paying support a few months later and now has at least one other child. He blamed me for him not bonding with our daughter because when he came to see her it was at my place and she would cling to me. Apparently he never considered the fact that he had only seen her 4 times from the day she was born until she was 2 as a contributing factor. I almost feel it’s better he walked away when she was too young to know him, but I feel bad for her because my stepfather is her father figure and he is an almost 70 year old smoker with diabetes, so she probably does not have much longer with him around.
There’s also a really old article where he used his youngest daughter to try to guilt Kate into talking to him again and it was disgusting. Kurt is their father in every way that matters and Bill’s horrible. Kate and Oliver are better off without him.
I have no idea about this particular situation but parental alienation is a real thing.
…and what recourse did fathers, especially, really have 40 years ago?
They still had legal rights. Not too mention he could cry to every tabloid about his desperation to see his kids so he actually had a HUGE advantage in that she was a celebrity that would want to maintain a good reputation. Face it, he didn’t try. He is a dead beat.
Well I hope the siblings have some relationship. It’s sad all around.
Well Bill probably reached his breaking point after that post from Oliver, with years of Kate and Oliver talking bad about his.
As for the situation, I believe Goldie did aleinate the kids from their father. Here’s an old People article form 1989 talking about the whole sad mess.
http://www.people.com/people/archive/article/0,,20120461,00.html#
Publicly disparaging your children is disgusting regardless of circumstances. I recognize that there are two sides to every story but I find his behavior really off putting.
….On a lighter note Kate Hudson is so lovely, her skin is flawless!
Oliver has every right to feel how he feels. He feels that man abandoned him so on Father’s Day it’s a reminder of that. Bill can drag Goldie’s name through the mud and back but to say that your own kids is dead to you really? If they was brainwashed like he says why place so much blame on them try understand how they feel instead. Not only did he give up trying to have a relationship with his kids but then trash them like this. Bill is a douche judging by his comments maybe he gave Goldie a good reason to alienate him.
The first time I ever saw Oliver Hudson, was in Rules of Engagement. And he was the sweet, slightly simple minded guy of the group. He was not a douche bag in that show. At all. That was David Spade’s job. 🙂
But I also really loved that show. And watch it randomly even now, when I come across it.
Bill Hudson. Sigh. Go have a seat.
Didn’t Cindy Williams, wife #2… find out what an POS he was during their divorce?
I’m curious why they still use his last name.
+1
Actors can create stage names so if Kate and Oliver did not want to associate with their bio Dad, easy fix.
P.S. I always found Kate Hudson’s pinched nose to be so unattractive so based on that childhood pic it appears that she really did get plastic surgery and CHOSE to get the pinched nose. Tragic.
They have used Hudson as a last name professionally for twenty years. Actors rarely change their name (unless hyphenating or adding their spouse’s name increases recognition) because it’s their brand.
Bill doesn’t own the last name “Hudson” and his comments were insane. He gave his children his last name at birth and wanting to take it back +/- 40 years later is immature and pointless.
He’s showing signs of being a seriously toxic person. His story of being usurped by Kurt Russel in a malicious plot by Goldie would have credence if he had tried to foster good relationships with his kids in adulthood. Instead, he says they’re dead to him because they chose Kurt as their father figure. Wow.
I was adopted as a baby and grew up knowing this because my adoptive parents were smart enough to be open and honest with me. Of course I grew up fantasizing about who my real parents were, and at the age of 25 I was given the opportunity to meet my birth mother. Our encounter was not what I had dreamed and the reality of our situation was clear – we were strangers. We maintained a relationship for over 15 years, and made an effort to learn to love each other until one day – over a petty disagreement – my birth mother dropped me and severed all ties by saying – she wasn’t my real mother, she was just the person who gave birth to me and that I was to never contact her again. To say the least I was devastated – 15 years of building a relationship flushed down the toilet like crap. All those cards and letters with ‘love you’ apparently meant nothing to her. I felt like trash, and abandoned not once, but twice by this woman who clearly doesn’t know how to work out emotional spats. Anyways, my point is this – there is a certain illusion when it comes to being connected to people through the notion that ‘we share the same blood’ therefore we must have a strong bond or connection, which may work for some but obviously not for all. My adoptive parents supported me through thick and thin. When we had problems, we love each other enough to work through them like a family should. I found that my birth mother dug up the past and hung it over my head like an immature 13 year old – telling someone they are dead to you is dumb. It’s hurtful and a very hard thing to deal with if you’re on the receiving end. In this situation, and with mine, it’s best just to close the door and appreciate the people who are truly there for you. Doesn’t matter if you’re related by blood, if you can’t find it in your heart to understand a person and forgive them, then it’s best to just walk away (and find a good therapist!).
I don’t know his response to Oliver’s instagram says a lot about what type of parent he is. Parent’s are supposed to love their kids unconditionally and take the high road even when they say or do hurtful things.
There is nothing my kids could do that would make me say such an awful thing.
Agreed that Bill Hudson has let bitterness cloud his judgement – he should have kept the skeletons in the closet. But there are two people who created this chasm in his relationship with Kate and Oliver. Goldie Hawn has a VERY controlled and well managed image as a cute, ditsy, loving, happy-go-lucky person that is for the most part manufactured. If you experienced the real Goldie, you would be shocked. She and her family have a massive cottage compound on a private island up in Muskoka (couple of hours north of Toronto, Canada). I’m up there frequently at a family cottage and I can tell you the locals don’t like her very much. There are plenty of stories of her rudeness and arrogance, melt-downs in local stores if she doesn’t get special treatment, trying to keep people from buying land near their island, etc.
Bill Hudson is acting like an utter DB by capitalizing on his estrangement from Kate and Oliver, but Goldie definitely pulled strings that led to this situation.
Oliver and Kate Hudson instigated this with their instagrams and they did it to hurt Bill Hudson. That was harsh. They knew this would hurt him deeply and it did. They are both adults and acted childish and vindictive so I’m taking Bill’s response as coming from years and years of being hurt and feeling alienated and now he has reached the point where he can’t take it anymore. Oliver and Kate wanted a response and, well, they got one.
No one won in the end. Plus, Goldie seems like a horrible person.
Yeah!!! It makes you scratch your head and wonder who raised them!
He’s supposed to be the parent and offer unconditional love.
Exactly. I’m sorry but as a parent, no matter how they act he should only be sending love back. My kids could shun me, hate me, talk trash about me and I would NEVER stop loving them. That is called being a parent. You love your kids and want the best for them and you love them even if they don’t love you back. He abandoned them, didn’t fight for custody nor visitation, gave up (assuming he tried at all) and is behaving like an ass.
He wrote a tell all book about them where he trashed them! He’s hardly the innocent one in this equation. He seems like a leech. Just my opinion.
To me all his bitterness and how he reacts lets me think he may be right and Goldie cut him out of his kids life and created the “absent father”.
If this guy really wasn´t interested in his children and didn´t want to be a father why is he that hurt about an instagram post? Why does he react this emotional after all these years?
A friend of mine is in such a situation. His ex told the kids he doesn´t love and want them. He was fighting to see them but his own kids then pushed him away. In the end he decided to wait till they are old enough to see through their mothers lies. When he contacted them a few months ago (they´re both teens now) all he got was major hate. They have a “new daddy” and mummy would never lie to them.
My friend has still hope. Who knows, maybe as grown-ups… although the Hudson siblings are grown and still write mean instagram posts. They talk about how Kurt Russel is their “real father” in every interview and trash their bio dad.
Look, none of us know exactly what happened with this family and the dynamics that were created by two people who clearly didn’t love each other. But I think it’s a stretch to point to Bill Hudson’s bitterness and hurt feelings as proof positive that this man wanted to be a parent to these kids. Nobody likes to be painted as a bad person, much less a bad parent. Defensiveness and anger are pretty standard reactions when one feels like one’s public persona is an unsavory one. It’s not necessarily indicative of a strong desire to be a paternal influence in his two children’s lives.
Additionally, I don’t really see evidence of him “fighting” to see his kids. Goldie had primary custody, but not full custody.
Anyway, even granting him the benefit of the doubt that he’s just a misunderstood victim of parental alienation and a good dude, he still comes across as really awful in every interview that he gives, insisting on sh*t-talking his relationship with his ex and Kate & Oliver.
What he told Radar online:
“I love Kate, but she has done stuff which is just awful. She is a spoiled brat in my eyes and at the end of the day, she should meet her little sister. I should meet my grandchild and she should help her grandmother,” referring to his mother who is currently battling Alzheimer’s disease. He went on to say, “Kate doesn’t have to talk to me and she doesn’t have to give her a dime of her millions. All I want is for her to call and say, ‘Hi grandma’, before it’s too late.”
http://www.cinemablend.com/pop/Bill-Hudson-Calls-Daughter-Kate-Spoiled-Brat-Writes-Tell-All-Book-34899.html#sthash.Tfd0gi8M.dpuf
Who talks about their estranged child like that? To Radar at that.
“If this guy really wasn´t interested in his children and didn´t want to be a father why is he that hurt about an instagram post? Why does he react this emotional after all these years?”
Actually, it’s a classic trait of narcissists and sociopaths to be easily angered when it comes to anyone disparaging their reputation. If he actually loved them and was hurt he would have said “I am so sorry you feel that way, I have always loved you and always will” not “STOP USING MY LAST NAME”.
Ugh, families. So complicated and stressful. There was absolutely no need for Oliver to do what he did. He doesn’t have to have anything to do with Bill but keep your family crap private. I can see Goldie playing the kids against him – who is a judge going to side with if it came to custody? Goldie was an A list star with mansions and holidays in Aspen and by the sounds of it she was a pretty chill mother who let them party – what chance did he have? It’s sad but sometimes you have to cut ties with people who hurt you, even family.
It’s better this way; at least it’s honest. Renounce all ties. I think Kurt should adopt Oliver and Kate. He’s their real dad anyway.
My parents divorced when I was around 9. I lived with him until his re-marriage 1 year later. I did not see him again until about 25. He never made any attempt to see me, and never paid child support.
My Mother allowed very frequent visits to my Paternal Grandmother’s house. He could have even dropped by on those weekends. He chose not too. But to this day he tells everyone in the town he lives in, that my Mother brainwashed me and kept me away from him and his family. He has from the start been very adamant about it. My Mother never said a bad word about him when I was younger.
He thinks it gets him sympathy. It probably does from people who do not really know him or the story. So I could definitely see this as a “oh poor me” thing while in public.
You know what? Sometimes you just have to say ‘fk you’ to someone, in public, because they abandoned you as a child.
+1
Oliver just did what we are allllll thinking.
This is not the first time Bill Hudson has reacted to this situation which is why I don’t really understand why Oliver posted his now famous tweet. He was bound to know he would get a rise out of Bill. It could be Oliver was feeling hurt and had a moment.
JMO, Oliver was trying to parlay some public sympathy, but sadly, he’s likely getting the opposite. I know I’m not feeling sorry for him.
What Bill said would’ve been ugly if he was saying it to a child/teenager/20-something clowning on Instagram, but we are talking about a dude pushing 40, who was acting like a total tool who wanted to have the last word. Well, Bill got the last word, as harsh as it may be.
IMO this makes Oliver look just as bad as his dad. Maybe Bill really was a terrible absentee dad. Maybe Goldie alienated her kids against their dad which isn’t uncommon. Maybe Kate really is an entitled spoiled brat (I don’t like Kate Hudson so I could easily believe this). What I have no patience for is family members being vindictive on social media. Oliver knew his father would react badly to the posting and he’s the one who started this. He knew it would create attention and it did. I can understand being hurt by his dad-maybe Bill said or did something which is what set him off but nobody wins in the end. Everybody walks away looking bad.
Agreed 100%.
I was very nasty and petty for him to start another round of public feuding. If he sees Kurt as a real day, why not just post “Happy Father’s Day Pa” to him and leave it at that?
During the time he was married to Goldie, Hudson would repeatedly show up at a friends window in the middle of the night. She had an affair with Bill that preceded his marriage to Goldie and continued throughout. She finally ditched the loser but he kept trying to rekindle. This kind of juvenile behavior is undoubtedly what ended his multiple marriages and relationships. I’ve never been able to understand how this ageing lothario makes a living.
Goldie was no angel….she had affairs while married to him. In fact she left him for another man she was seeing, and left the kids with him while she did so. There are two parties responsible for the breakdown of their marriage.
It doesn’t matter what your kids do to you, you don’t ever say things like that about them, that alone tells me what he’s capable of and I’m more inclined to believe Goldie now. What an asshole, and he could’ve fought for them if Goldie was truly keeping them away!
Totally agree.
Plus, why lash out at Kate if Oliver made the comment?
Ugh. What an awful situation. When I read Bills comments i thought how awful… but then i sat back and heard what he didn’t say. And remembered how much Oliver did say. This isn’t the first time (or 10th time we’ve heard Oliver) bash his dad publicly. And it makes it that much worse in my opinion because continually throwing Kurt as a weapon. Everyone here is in the wrong. Literally the kids, the adults, the step parents. This is a hot mess. And while I don’t agree with his words because they were made out of anger, I almost feel like separation is good. Come back hopefully in a decade when tensions aren’t so high. All the anger is settled. It doesn’t sound like there’s any contact anyway so no harm no foul. And not for nothing. Oliver, yes your dad is a bastard, but your grown ass can carry your butt over to your dads and start a relationship if you want one. Testing him too through this – he’s absent when you’re grown it too far. Kate and Oliver have reached the make an effort also stage. And Bill stop taking your Goldie hate out on the kids. They’re grown already.
A-holes all the way around. I don’t know who to feel sorry for.
Perfect and concise. Thank You!
This a$$hole!! I have a relative who lost both of her children within a couple years of one another. There are people all over the world unable to have kids, desperately wanting them. And this..person(?), this bitter fool, says his living, healthy kids are “dead to him”? Oh my god, buddy. Your karma…no matter what happened with Goldie, he should not be saying those words about his children. Sick and twisted and sad. Thank god for Kurt.
I agree. God forbid anything ever happen to his babies. Yes, those are his babies. My daughters will always be my babies no matter how old they are. It shocked me to read below that is his sense of humor, therefore, acceptable. I have to wonder if he has ever lost someone to death in his life that truly affected him or that he truly cared for. If so, he would never utter those words. You never give up on the ones you love.
It’s amazing to me how some people can treat their children and grandchildren. I’ve had first hand experience with an absentee father, and let me just say when he was on his deathbed he was a sorry man full of regret. Even after all the hurt he had caused, I pitied him for what he had threw away and all he had missed out on.
I’ll bet there’s a certain amount of truth on both sides but Hudson quotes Goldie as saying ” it makes a better story” when asking why she was feeding the abandonment story to the press? That doesn’t ring true to me….
I honestly can’t believe how many people defends the dad. He made money trashing his kids in this interview and in his book he is no better than the lohans. It’s not as if he’s low key cutting them off, he feels the need to announce it via a trashy tabloid complete with horrible statements about his kids.
Also you people have obviously never been abandoned by a parent. It’s a fundamental hurt that cuts to the core of your being. It’s the ultimate betrayal, when not even your parent can love you who is gonna love you? It can create terrible insecurities in a person.
I am not saying that Oliver was right to tweet this but not everyone is able to be super mature about it or ” just move on”.
It was completely inappropriate for Oliver to tweet this. Bill Hudson is definitely not going to be winning any Father of the Year awards. Being abandoned by your parent is one of the things that many people will never get over completely. However there is a side to every story, whether or not that side may be true is up for debate.
But I’m not interested in what really happened. I just can’t stand people airing their personal family problems on social media for all to see. It’s a poor reflection of that person and it makes Oliver look petty and juvenile when he is a grown man. He is not 12. There really is NO excuse for that kind of behavior, looking to stir up problems.
Sadly, I suspect that a New York Times editorial may be in the offing, as crazy as that sounds. And none of these jackhammers… I mean NONE OF THEM would deserve that sort of forum, especially Goldie Hawn. Just because she’s the biggest star among this lot, I don’t want to hear from her, especially if she’s going to justify Oliver’s behavior.
Seriously, if a NYT editorial happens, what a serious blow to it’s credibility. Mind you, credibility be damned, since they already gave Nick Loeb a platform.
This is so sad. I get the feeling that the truth is somewhere in the middle. I’m sure there was an amount of ugly talk by Goldie about Bill Hudson to the kids. Bill Hudson is taking his anger and vengeful feelings out on them now, which no matter what they believe or did is a mistake. I KNOW. My siblings and I were pawns in our parents battles for years! We made to side with our custodial parent–who was in the position to do it since that parent had custody and we were totally dependent. The same thing seemed to happen with Ireland Baldwin when it came to Alec and Kim Bassinger.
As you grown up and mature you begin to see BOTH sides of the story and–in my case–began to acknowledge the flaws in the custodial parent becoming extremely angry for making it look like it was totally the other parents fault. Parents like that only say “I’m not perfect, I’m human, no parent is perfect,etc.” when you grow up and begin to reason things out for yourself.
I hoping that All parties begin to be honest with themselves and begin making amends.
Have Goldie or Kurt ever had anything public to say about Bill Hudson? I don’t think so. That fact, coupled with his apparent need to whine publicly about his ex and his children speak volumes to me. Goldie and Kurt understand that speaking badly about Bill would hurt the children (children identify with their parents whether they know it or not). Bill Hudson only cares about Bill Hudson. Douchekabob.
Over the years Goldie has said plenty of things about Bill that aren’t nice in interviews. Also, Cindy Williams Bill’s second wife said years ago that Goldie was bad mouthing Bill to the kids and prevented the kids from seeing Bill.
This is a far more complicated thing than people are making it. Keep in mind both Kate and Oliver have said not very nice things about Bill over the years, and Oliver’s remarks over Instagram at 36 years old seemed really childish. I wondered when I saw it why now, and then Bill responds so strong, also wondered why now? They are all adults now they should act a little more responsible, and if they have a problem speak to the person directly not blast it on a blog, book, interview, instagram, etc. So childish! I will give you this Kurt hasn’t said anything, at least he has been responsible about it.
Clearly they all have issues. It appears that Oliver, Kate, and Bill are all holding on to a hell of a lot of resentment and anger. It’s sad all around.
You should never say that to your children, no matter how butt hurt you are. It also doesn’t matter if they’re adults now. Putting myself in Bill Hudsons shoes I would have replied “I have never abandoned you, I never would, and never will. Even if we do not speak again, I will love you both forever”. Think about how they would feel if they read that from their biological father. It could possibly open doors to a relationship imo. He handled that in an extremely selfish manner.
Oliver Hudson is bloody hilarious. He’s one of the very few celebs I follow on Instagram. His posts are pretty much always in jest, and he has a very quirky sense of humour. I’d advise having a browse through his Instagram to get an idea of his general tone. I’d say this was a joke with serious undertones. Poor taste? Yes probably; but people dealing with the painful things in their lives with humour is pretty normal and actually healthy.
As for Bill and Goldie, none of you “know” what happened here. This is a case of he said / she said. Relating to either party personally does not make them the wronged party. My only comment is that, regardless of whether he abandoned his kids, was alienated by his ex, or something in between; Bill’s comments about his children are unacceptable from a father.
Anyway, check out Oliver’s Instagram! He’s great value.
There is no joking manner that would be acceptable in saying that. This is solely my opinion of course, but even I felt hurt reading that in the written word and it has nothing to do at all with me personally. Humor or not, have some self awareness.
About Kate Hudson …Im not a Hollywood insider. For months the talk is….Kate Hudson needs something spotlighting her. And she needs spotlight attention immediately , or she’ll disappear from sight ..forever. And next comes the BIG STORY of a MAKEUP because somebody like Kurt or Bill or kids were almost sick…
Go on…
I don’t know – Oliver seems pretty solid. He works consistently, comes across as a nice enough bloke in the press, has been married for almost a decade and has a couple of kids himself. Maybe now that he is a Dad he has his own perspective of his father’s failings and is able to call it what he sees it as – abandonment. He is late thirties so you would think he had enough life experience to judge his parents with a reasonable amount of honest reflection and self awareness.
Yeah maybe putting it on social media was a dumb move but everyone everywhere puts everything on social media. Why should he censor himself? The father has publicly shamed him, his sister and mother for years and acting like a child having a tantrum because it all wasn’t about him and his needs. Maybe Oliver read the book when it came out and was deeply hurt by it. Maybe instead of making a statement at the time (which would have gotten Bill attention and possibly improved sales) he decided to wait to make a pointed statement on Father’s Day that got the message across.
If it really was parental alienation, he wouldn’t trash his kids, he wouldn’t disown them. He would state that he loves them, he wishes he was in their lives and if anything ever changed, he is simply a phone call away if they choose to have a relationship with him. If you genuinely love your kids and are not using them as a career stepping stone / accessory / PR angle then you would never make those types of comments. I mean, how’s Bill’s career going? Is this the only way that he can get some attention??
I doubt this guy would really give a damn about them if Kurt Russell wasn’t in their lives. He was replaced by a better and more upstanding man. Not to mention that Goldie was able to maintain that relationship. You know Bill was waiting for it to end then he could use it to stay she was the problem not him.
Bill isn’t winning himself any sympathy.
Really folks? It’s 2015 and most of the commenters here are still in a place of automatically taking the mother’s side in stories/cases of bitter custody battles/divorce?
Of course, none of us know the real story of what happened here because we weren’t there but parental alienation is a very real thing that happens every day and THAT is what destroys kids emotionally. My radar immediately goes off any time I hear adult kids retell stories of one parent having being the saint and the other the devil. Every human is flawed and if the adult kids still don’t question anything the “saintly” parent ever told them…It’s pretty clear what went on.
I’ve always wondered about the timeline and Bill’s laying out of things makes sense. Goldie NEVER did say a bad word about her ex husband to the press in the late 70’s/early 80’s then Kurt comes along and bam! He’s Kate and Oliver’s father and Bill is suddenly a “monster” and not anywhere to be found. Seems pretty funky to me. But then, even in the 70’s a man could have very publicly and loudly have gone to court to fight to see his kids so…idk.
The truth, as is almost always the case, is probably a good mix of both.