Last fall, we learned that Frances Bean Cobain had gotten secretly married. I had actually forgotten all about it, so I had a “???” thought bubble over my head when I read the news about her sudden divorce. To recap, Frances is currently 23 years old. Initially, last fall, the story was that Frances quietly married Isaiah Silva, her then-boyfriend of some-odd five years. The story was that the wedding went down around October 2015. But as we now learn, they were actually married less than two years ago. And now that Frances is done with him, she wants to make sure he doesn’t get her money.
Frances Bean Cobain is pulling the plug on her marriage, and she wants to make it clear to her husband … he may look like Kurt Cobain, but his money is all hers. Frances married Isaiah Silva back in June of 2014. 31-year-old Isaiah is in a rock band called The Eeries.
They’ve been together for 5 years but married for less than 2, and it seems 23-year-old Frances is nervous enough to include in her divorce docs that Isaiah should not even think about making a money grab for her dad’s estate — reportedly valued at $450 MILLION. She indicates in the docs she’s open to paying him spousal support. They have no kids.
This, ladies and gentlemen, is why you need to call Laura Wasser before you even get married. Because Wasser will talk a young, love-stupid, rich woman into getting a pre-nup. That way there won’t be a scramble to protect your assets after the marriage falls apart. While I’m guessing that Frances’ fortune is already well insulated from any potential golddigger dudes, this is a dangerous game to play with a $450 million fortune. As for the divorce… meh, classic starter marriage. I actually applaud Frances for being so low-key about her personal life.
Frances also made a rare public appearance three days ago with her mom in LA. Huh.
Photos courtesy of Getty, WENN, Instagram.
I imagine she is protected, too, but if she’s not, then he should, I suppose, get whatever he’s entitled to by law.
He should only be entitled to half of what was earned during the marriage, right? At least, that’s how it would work here in Texas. Property separately inherited prior to marriage doesn’t automatically become marital property upon marriage in California, does it?
I was divorced in Texas, and you’re right about that. If she didn’t commingle the funds, she would be fine. I don’t know about California except that it’s a community property state, but I can’t imagine that he would get half of what she inherited. I don’t know for sure, though.
I didn’t know you used to live in Texas, GNATTY. I don’t think he’d even get half of the interest earned during the marriage on the separate property.
BTW, I kind of think of you as the cool Internet aunt I didn’t get to have in reality. Love your posts.
Right there with you, @Size Does Matter! I feel the same way about GNAT.
Same here! Love my daily dose of GNAT!!!
You guys are the best! That makes me feel so good, and I needed it today. I would love to be the aunt! ❤️
I would think a $450 million endowment could earn a lot in just a couple years.
She is so beautiful and looks so much like her father.
You think? I think before she got all that plastic surgery she looked just like Courtney did before SHE got all her surgery. Now she looks like post-surgery Courtney.
It’s really weird–like they got matching plastic surgery. I guess they both hated the same aspects of their original faces.
yeah, seems like it
She really did look like Courtney pre-surgery with the nose, chin and lips. It’s weird how she looks so much like Kurt now (she does to me!) But then she’s always had his eyes, and I think a lot of it has to do with her small frame and the way she carries herself – just like Kurt.
shutterbug99, I always saw more Kurt than Courtney in her face. And I agree there’s something about her mannerisms that also resembles him.
My son has none of my dad’s features but makes the same facial expressions, so that it makes him seem to look like him sometimes when he really doesn’t.
She definitely has Kurt’s eyes.
She does look a lot like her mother before all the plasticizing.
I think Kurt and Courtney looked like each other to be honest, like a grunge Phil ‘n’ Lil.
Didn’t know about the plastic surgery, but when I saw her, I thought, “What a beautiful girl.”
I agree, she looks very pretty with reconstruction,, and I hope she doesn’t have to continue to get fillers throughout her life as they age person prematurely. I would have to see her in person to know if the surgery made her look weird or not, but in photos she looks nice. I must say it’s so strange for young women to drastically change their face for cosmetic reasons, but she had an emotional rejection of her mother in the puberty years so because she looked so much like Courtney I can see the impetus to change so dramatically.
A lot of that is makeup, and some of it is surgery. She’s outstanding with eyeliner.
I agree. Everything about her is gorgeous. She’s dramatically, hauntingly gorgeous. Kurt is somewhere, smiling and joyful. She’s one of his two greatest legacies. I wish her well.
Well I’m side eyeing this guy for being in his late twenties and dating a teenager. I’m sure her being music royalty had nothing to do with his interest, since he’s a struggling musician and all. I hope the court denies spousal support, considering he has his band and can make his own money.
+1
Very pretty.
My understanding was that inheritances are usually not marital property.
Right, inheritances are not. However, her fortune could factor in to any spousal support, I think. Or whatever inheritance was used to purchase marital property may then be considered joint marital property (unless they kept extensive and detailed paper trails). Other than that, her inheritance remains her own. At least, this is the rule in Canada. I’m not sure about the US.
I think this is the case as long as assets are not mingled– if it is all in her name, she should be okay. Where I am not clear is on income produced by those assets–if they were using dividends to support themselves, then the dividends could be considered marital property. Other things in her favor: no kids, and he has a career. I predict a fair distribution of marital property and maybe some spousal support.
That’s my best guess as well. Hopefully she kept the core inheritance assets separated. Any income from said assets during the marriage may be fair game.
Dividends are the problem – he could be entitled to 50% of those dividends.
Until 1 year ago prenups weren’t valid in my country, and my attorneys sat me down and explained to me what was at stake if I ever got married (I’m a shareholder and get dividends) – whatever money I earn through them are fair game in a divorce, a future ex husband could ask for that money even if it was used to pay school fees, holidays or a house.
That was my thought also.
Speaking from personal experience – yes, inheritances are not martial property if the assets were kept separate. Even if there was some co-mingling, for example I put my ex’s name on one of the accounts, if you can prove that all the money in the account was from your inheritance they still may not be able to get it.
*however* what they can do is demand an amount that’s low enough, but not too low, that fighting it in court would cost you more than what it’s worth. Which is what my ex did once he realized he couldn’t touch the bulk of it. Nasty and unethical but legal.
I have an irrevocable trust set up for me and I was told even if I get married, my spouse cant touch it in a divorce even sans pre-nup. If any inheritance/trust was setup prior to wedding, which I assume it was, he can’t touch it unless he asks for spousal support and that would surely only be for a few years anyways right?
She is beautiful.
And they said it wouldn’t last….and it didn’t. I’d love to say something snarky about her, but having Courtney Love as a mother is enough punishment. This girl was born to heroin addicts and now has dad’s fortune. Seeing how Kurt Cobain hated the opulent lifestyle he fell into, I can only imagine he wouldn’t want his daughter fighting over it. His demons killed him and I hope Frances can somehow keep her head above water and live happily ever after, something Kurt thought and was probably right could never be had by him. Happiness that is..
Classic “starter marriage” might be fine when you’re both young, poor, and stupid; but a young person with $450 million (!!!) cannot afford to be so careless. That’s the trade off for that kind of wealth. Lesson learned, hopefully not too expensive a lesson.
It’s sad and crazy to me that “classic starter marriage” is even a thing.
I’m in my early thirties and already half of my friends have been through a divorce. And it’s been hell for every one of them. It’s a horrible thing to go through.
Why do young people rush down the aisle? Why is marriage not taken seriously? I’m not a religious person but my marriage vows are the most sacred vows I’ve ever taken, and I didn’t take them until I was sure that this was the man, through thick and thin, and that this was it for me for LIFE.
I think some young people get caught up in the wedding, the dress, the event. And I think marriage is thrown away like so many other things in our throw-away culture. Done with it, throw it away. It’s sad, these young couples go through so much pain. It’s normalized by our society because, as this article shows, it IS normal. But it’s not without a huge amount of pain and loss. And that’s not even starting the conversation of when children are involved!
I’m open to hearing other’s thoughts on this, always interested in what you all have to say here on celebitchy. I hope Frances is supported and heals quickly.
My niece is a few years older than Frances and she’s already divorced and went right into another long term relationship, which am sure will end up in marriage.
Given Frances’s tragic childhood, I wonder if she married early for some kind of stability. Perhaps she felt that marriage could bring her the comfort and stability that she lacked in childhood, an instant-family with a partner that she could rely upon for support and loyalty?
I may be projecting here, as I came from an abusive childhood home and married my college sweetheart for like reasons. It wasn’t so much that I wanted to be married as that I wanted a home life that I’d never had before. He ended up being a cheating bastard and I left him three years later. Now happily married to a wonderful man that is a true partner.
I can relate, michelleb.
Glad for you to have found a true partner! Thanks for sharing your insight here.
Yes. This is also the reason why so many teenage girls from abusive homes get pregnant and married early imo. They just want “someone to love (me) unconditionally”. Poor or loaded, deep down people want the same things.
While I was growing up divorce was rarely heard of and in most cases there was some type of abuse involved: physical/alcohol/drug/etc. All of today’s society is disposable. Once something breaks it is replaced by something new and very few people try the repair route. Divorce is so easy to get today and people don’t think about the consequences to it. Also, seems like many are not comfortable in their own skin. They always have to be in a relationship of some type. When I married it was for life. Unfortunately after 25 years I was not enough for my ex. I never did enough in his eyes.
That’s awful swak, but you deserve someone who thinks you are enough. More than enough. And you will find him, I believe. I know I did.
That is sad swak. I hope you know you are enough no matter how he behaved. I’m going through a split and like you I ever thought it would happen. I believe in the end we are lucky to be able to find new happiness on our own terms.
I think you’re right in some cases, but not in most. I don’t think you take your wedding vows any more seriously other people. You just had the sense to know you weren’t ready or you didn’t meet anyone you wanted to marry until you were older. And I hope your marriage lasts forever, but you’re still very young, and frankly you have no idea what will happen to you. I really believe that most people enter marriage believing in their commitment and their vows. I did, at 24. I was, unfortunately, too naive and inexperienced to see that this man I loved was not worthy of that love. He was smart, handsome, adoring and fun. Then we had every one of the most stressful life events happen to us – death of a parent, job loss (3 times), moving (11 times), infertility (7 years), infidelity (countless), alcoholism, physical and emotional abuse. The person I married ceased to exist and I found myself trapped in a nightmare. But when I took those vows, I meant them from the bottom of my heart, and they were sacred to me as well. So, I found your comment a little smug and self-righteous, although you seem like a nice person. But it’s not fair to think that just because someone is divorced that they married to get a nice dress.
I find this comment a little smug and self righteous.
mllejuliette: How did you find it smug or self righteous? Patricia said she was open to other people’s opinions, and GNAT gave hers. And Patricia WAS being judgmental in her post, and GNAT responded to that in a very nice way.
Agree, GoodNames. I think many women have an idealized view of marriage and commitment. And even if their views aren’t unrealistic, they are also absolutely serious about their vows until life “ever after” unfolds.
I actually think it’s the same with parenting, people have an idealized view of babies and family and don’t realize how stressful raising kids can be. The difference is you can’t divorce your kids (or least not easily).
I’ve become sort of cynical about the institution of marriage. If I could have a do-over I don’t think I’d marry. But then again, as life happens, I might change my stance on that. 🙂
@Crumpet
Thank you. She reminds me of my brother when we were little children. I would say “could you please be quiet, I’m trying to study,” and he (who was not even in kindergarten) would say, “YOU be quiet. I’M trying to study.” Lol
@Esmom
Exactly. My parents had and still have a wonderful marriage. I (stupidly) thought that’s what marriage was like. Effortless. But don’t give up on it. I’ve seen so many many genuinely happy marriages in my life – never perfect, but true love stories. Including the one I have now. In some ways, I’m glad I went through the fire because I appreciate it more. In other ways, I could have just wised up sooner.
NO ONE should get married at 24. There. Done. Don’t make excuses for your poor choices.
@Portugal
You’re right, probably. Inexcusably rude, insufferably smug, showing no social skills or compassion for others, BUT it’s probably true that no one should get married at 24. I certainly shouldn’t have. But I’m not sure I’m “making excuses” for my poor choice. I’m 59 years old. Everyone I knew was getting married at that age or younger. It didn’t seem odd to me at the time, in fact, it seemed rather the thing to do. But I won’t bother continuing, since I’m apparently talking to the one person in the world who has never tried to understand why she made a mistake so she can learn and grow. What a delightful person you must be to have around. Your friends and family must bask in the comfortable, warm glow of your empathy whenever they fall short of your expectations.
I’ve said it a million times on this board but my mom married at 22 (dad was 24) and almost fifty years later, they’re still going strong.
@mllejuliette and @Portugul
That is incredibly rude on both of your parts. And says a lot about you as people that your reaction to someone sharing their experience like that is judgement.
Hello there GNAT. First i want to say I am sorry for your experience. I have read a lot of your posts and i come to see that you are a very serious person regarding your life and your choices (but a radiant person at that mind you).
As for early marriages i have a friend recently divorced. She married at 22 and had a baby at the same time. 10 years later and after a lot of abuse they FINALLY got divorced and it was a big trauma for her. But i know for sure that despite all of what she went through she wanted to stay married and didn’t take her marriage lightly. She fought till the end (and may i say in vain as he was beyond normal abuse at that point. If you ask me i wanted to know exactly what she was thinking but again i have never been abused like that, if ever), it was never about the dress or the idea of marriage for her.
Now Frances had been with the guy for 5 years before marrying him??? So she didn’t came to the marriage with her eyes closed. It just doesn’t makes sense to me. Some things just end. She will recover though. She will pay some but she will recover. Be sure her lawyer will make sure she doesn’t pay more than she wants too.
Aaaand i want to say that i envy her fortune. 450 millions. My God, i wish i had 45. I would do so much with them. I would be soooo happppyyyyyy. Even less. I am poor and still don’t want a man by my side to “love and complete me”. Imagine IF i was rich like her…oh oh oh :p
I thought the trends are showing that more couples are waiting until their 30’s to get married. I know women are more and more starting their families later in life (I certainly did). But yes, marriage has become a throw-away item to many many people. They think, “Well, I just fell out of love, so it’s OK if I move on” without understanding that love is a choice that you make every day. It is an action, not an emotion. That blush of first love fades and changes, but that doesn’t mean it’s time to move on.
maybe you are right, but unless you are very “couply” person, or the children are involved, or you are religious, I dont see why stay then? I think being in the couple makes sense only if it’s much better than being single.
I don’t know about trends but I’ve seen something interesting in my own circle of friends. Two couples that I know (long-term dating couples, I’m talking 8 and ten years respectively) got married in their early – mid-thirties and both couples have broken up now. One after two years -the other lasted a little longer. It’s weird to me that two couples that dated for so long (and so seemingly happily) got married and suddenly everything went to hell.
Someone explain to me why this happens? I had a thought that these couples were possibly not as happy as I thought them to be and maybe used marriage as a band-aid. I’ve heard of band-aid babies, but is band-aid marriage a thing?!
Love is a choice that you make every day. It is an action, not an emotion. I’ll remember this the next time I’m asked how my husband and I managed to stay together so long.
You are so right. And it hasn’t been easy. But we’re in it for the long haul.
I’m 28 (29 in May) and several of my high school friends are divorced. My one friend got jmarried at 23, after having 2 kids and being together for 5 years. She has been with her boyfriend for almost 2 years now. Another friend was with her husband for 4 years, had an almost year long engagement, sold her house, bought a new one closer to his job, got married late August 2015 and by mid-late January there were no longer any pictures or mentions of him. She has now moved back to our town and going through the divorce process. It’s crazy. I think some people try and for others if it’s not perfect or how they imagine they let go.
the thing is, nothing in this world remains constant. The person who made those vows 10 years ago is not the same person anymore. We change, our partners change. Furthermore, the ideas we have of other people are mostly havily influenced by our own illusions, expectations and wishfull thinking. Even the ideas of ourselfes.
And, finally, the fact that some people stay in marriage doesn’t mean necessarily that they are happy, fullfilled, or even like each other. I mean, everyone has their reasons for staying in marriage, but lets not gloss over it. For many people that reason is fear of loneliness or just inertia.
Generally, divorce isn’t a mutual thing. One person usually wants out. Hence, why so many divorces.
As someone around that age I don’t think it really has anything to do with ‘throw-away’ cukture. I think you’re seeing a normal progression from a time when it was basically forbidden to get a divorce to now where we argue up and down women/men SHOULD get divorced.
Certainly some people are too cavalier with their marriages but that’s not new or surprising. The couple that breaks up and gets together every few months isn’t suddenly going to become perfectly devoted in their marriage but that’s a small outlier.
The truth is the more consequence you remove from something the more people will explore their options. Girls have more casual sex now because we’ve gotten birth control in such order that a young girl who’s pregnant isn’t met with a shrug and an ‘oh well’. Likewise a young couple who ‘feel’ (and hey all marriage is just you hoping it all works out) like they want to be committed don’t have the same barriers in place they used to in the past.
I’d argue marriage now is actually based more on genuine love than in prior years and as a result divorce DOES occur more and that’s not a bad thing. Know what women my mom’s age were told if your husband beats you? Stay in the marriage, a think of your children. Don’t have children? Stay in the marriage, who will want you after him? He flagrany cheats or is a drunk? Stay in the marriage. It was only a few good families that chose to give women unconditional support. So we have more unhappy marriages with fewer divorces because two people who hate each other just feel stuck. Let’s not even get into how many men/women knew they were gay and had to get cover marriages.
I also believe off the top of my head there was a study done that showed many couples who had stayed together for decades were suddenly showing sudden growth in divorce. Baby boomers essentially going, “You know what? I don’t HAVE to die with this person. Society has FINALLY put standards in place where if need be I can get child/spousal support/a divorce and I’m not some unfaithful whore who needs to die.”
I think you made so many great points. Expectations have changed and vary from person to person. People stay married for all sorts of reasons that would not be acceptable to other people. I have a friend who has been married for 40 years. She doesn’t especially like her husband, but she says “What am I going to do now? Start dating? No thanks.” I have another friend who has been married over 30 years and she never loved her husband. She’s perfectly happy. She’s not a romantic person and all she wanted from marriage was company, children and financial security. I would rather be divorced than be in either situation, but we are all different. However, I think more and more people want to feel happy and fulfilled in their marriage or get out of it. And you’re right, that’s not necessarily a bad thing.
Exactly what I was thinking. Some people idealize what marriage was in the past without thinking about the real reasons why past marriages “lasted forever”: because it was socially unacceptable to get divorced. I doubt it was all hard work and effort on our ancestors’ parts, and I doubt most where truly happy with the situation. Love within marriage is a pretty recent concept, anyway. Marriage used to be about practical business matters rather then true devotion, so it makes sense that now that people don’t “have” to get married they also don’t feel the need to stay in relationships that aren’t fulfilling or are toxic.
I have to agree with those that said that people no longer have to stay in unhappy or abusive marriages. Have you ever considered that maybe people aren’t being exactly truthful on the reasons they split?
I participate in a few forums and groups where it inevitably turns into discussions about marriage. Let me tell you, they’re all trying. They all want advice on how to fix it.
I know if my husband and I ever split I would give some kind of generic answer about how we couldn’t make things work.
Part of my comment got cut off so to continue:
Younger married couples are already shown to engage more in marital counseling than their older counterparts so this idea that they treat their relationships so frivolously because they’re choosing to live in new parameters (some of which has to do with our changing economy) seems wrong.
After counseling and trying with renewed effort I see no trophy in staying with a loveless marriage. Even to echo GNAT you believe yourself to be on the other side of the spectrum because you have not YET gotten divorced. This isn’t meant to be insulting, just that when you take any institution where success is measured by remaining in that institution for LIFE you have a long way to go before you claim success. But that’s the point. If for some reason things don’t work out between you and your husband you have guards place in place to allow you to safely and carefully extricate yourself from your marriage. Teenage years to 30’s is a moment of massive person growth and sadly you can grow right out of a marriage the same way you can a high school friendship. All the counseling in the world can resolve why things went wrong and how to proceed in a healthier way but it can’t force feelings of love and devotion to remain. Once they’re gone, they’re gone and without them marriage doesn’t make much sense. So that’s the point that humans have been falling in love same as ever and now we’re able to say, “This relationship isn’t good anymore.” and somewhat maturely understand it just happens.
No one has failed at life. There are financial scars and issues but most of your friends probably did believe they were making a life-long committment and thank goodness they chose to end it before children come along and it’s even harder.
Yes, this exactly. Also wanted to add that seeing your vows as something that should be unbreakable can be really harmful. My mom stayed married to my abusive and alcoholic deadbeat dad for years and years longer than she should have, but she considered her vows to be sacred. Your health and sanity should be sacred.
ITA Patricia
Could see that Francis did it as another step to get away from her crazy mother. Maybe have her our life as Frances rather than a Cobain?
Could see that Francis did it as another step to get away from her crazy mother. Maybe have her our life as Frances rather than a Cobain?
I didn’t get married expecting to be where I am now. I don’t think most people expect an unhappy ending. I honestly loved my husband and was set to go the distance. If I had not met him I think I would have waited several years before settling down but he came along and he seemed wonderful. We seemed very compatible. He’s extremely charismatic, athletic, good looking, creative, intelligent and has that alpha personality I liked but was very generous, kind and loving. He’s socially aware and we share political views. He seemed like a catch and everyone kept saying how lucky I was. He chased and I liked that he was so damn determined.
But after we married the fairytale ended slowly. The babies came and he was so into it and my step children became like my own so it seemed like it was all working smoothly. First I started noticing how selfish he could be. All those great qualities had a flip side that was negative. He is arrogant, vain, entitled, spoiled, narcissistic and possessive. He is exhausting and controlling. I have my faults too so I don’t blame him entirely or much at all really.
I just had to split from him or else lose my mind. It wasn’t that I took my vows lightly at all. I hung in as long as I could. Divorce is rare in my family and I didn’t want to be the one who failed and he played on this. But I simply don’t love him anymore and I don’t think it’s healthy for my children or me to live in an unhappy home. He still doesn’t get it but that’s his problem not mine.
In the past I would have been stuck with very few options. I chose to mostly stay home and do projects when it suited me but he’s the one with the financial power and it’s lucky for me he isn’t an ass when it comes to that. Maybe if I had a do over I might have done some things differently but I don’t so life moves on.
I don’t think anyone should stay in a bad marriage. Marriage should be a choice not an endurance test imo.
Exactly. You fall in love with one person, and they slowly change into someone else. Sometimes, anyway. Or aspects of their personality that were hidden emerge. Or bad things happen to them in their life and they turn to destructive sources to feel better. It’s so easy before it happens to you to believe that it’s because of something you did, and how deeply you love, or how committed you are, but a lot of it is just luck, and the self-knowledge that most people don’t have in their early twenties.
True GNAT. So spot on. It’s hard to articulate unless you have been there. It’s also heartbreaking and painful and very confusing while you are in it.
People have always gotten married young. The difference today is that we are no longer trapped in horrible marriages and do have the option to divorce. Back in the day, girls were married off in their teens and stuck with who they married no matter what – having to endure abuses of all kinds. IMO it is better to have the choice to leave than to feel there is not way out and be shunned if you did run away from it.
Also, I don’t think girls marry for the wedding and the dress and the attention. I think young girls marry because they are in love in the moment but don’t really know who they’re marrying until it’s too late. Most young people want to marry and have a family. That’s nothing to put down. It is a legitimate and natural human desire. Unfortunately many young people do not take the time to really know who it is they are marrying. They think they know them but haven’t been through ups and downs with them yet to see how they handle things that don’t go their way, what their family dynamics are and how that affects things….young people tend to not really know a person’s character yet because they haven’t been afforded the opportunities to see the person’s true character.
And most people do get married thinking it’s for life. Many stay way too long trying to make it work and trying to change they’re partner – looking at potential rather than reality. I happen to still be married to the same man I married 20 years ago but that makes me feel blessed rather than smarter than anybody. I didn’t know him any more than most people really know who they’re marrying. It just happened to work out for us. That makes me lucky – not superior.
i agree with all you say, but for the lucky part. lol.
we are at fifteen years this anniversary, and my family and friends are always saying we are “lucky”…but i can’t agree.
we worked at it.
we worked at compromising, especially as we are very different as parents and people, we worked at making sure we didn’t drift too far apart…
i don’t mean it was awful or horrible work, but it has been work not luck for us.
we really cherish the family we have built and make an ongoing effort to check in and keep things open so we can keep our family as one.
actually, this last two weeks we have taken to teasing each other with “dropping the ego” as a catch phrase because we just had a break through with it and not carrying resentments and on and on.
sorry to babble. i just really liked what you said but wanted to weigh in on the lucky part. 🙂
@kay
I think the most important word you used was “we.” If both people are in it, all the way, you can survive most things life through a at you. But you can’t do it by yourself.
I agree there is an element of “working” at it and a lot of give and take, but as far as deal-breakers, my husband and I have not experienced that. Nobody has cheated, beaten on each other, abused in any way each other or our child, and there haven’t been and closeted secrets that came out later, no addictions, etc. So in that respect, I do feel we were/are blessed that we both did in fact end up being the people we thought each other was when we married. If he cheated on me, or beat me or our son, I would divorce him….in a heartbeat and he would me if the roles were reversed. That’s all I meant by that – Lucky in not learning or experiencing anything awful enough about each other to make either want out of the marriage.
gnat and jenniferjustice:
thank you. valid points and true.
and fully and totally agree with your clarification, jj…in that case, then, i would count my husband and i as “lucky”.
<3
+1-especially if they have assets that are enough to be the GDP for a small country!
I’m 35 and know more people divorced than married. I have never been married but have been in 3 long term relationships (grateful everyday I never married any of them). I cannot imagine marrying before now honestly.
I agree that people have been getting married young for a long time. I believe my grandma got married at 17.
I also agree that luck plays into it. I’ve watched so many people be blindsided by the changes in their partners. Of course, a marriage is work, but it’s a lot easier when you end up with a partner that wants to work with you. I got married at 19 and we have grown closer together over the past 9 years. I know a couple with the same time frame and he is emotionally abusive, cheats, and makes her do everything. He wasn’t that way in the beginning. He treated her like a queen and called her his angel. Talk about hard work when it comes to saving your marriage. I would have left.
It’s pretty anecdotal to say that all young people have these sorts of marriages. I’m 35 and have friends who are already 10-14 years into marriage and going strong, but I also do know of a few quickie marriages. The ones with the short ones invariably got married with fairly cavalier attitudes and a bit of a lack of depth to the relationship but that can happen at any age.
I am in my early thirties, married four years. My husband kept several bombshells from me until after I signed the marriage license–all deal breaker issues. If I had known how financially irresponsible he really is I never would have married him in the first place. He had a stroke two months after we got married which only magnified the problems–he is not in any way close to the man who asked me to marry him. He is a completely different person and has already admitted that he had no plans to work on our issues or change in any way. I am already getting my ducks in a row for a divorce to protect myself as well as I can.
I always have to eyeroll whenever someone thinks that young marriages ending in divorce are because the couple “didn’t take it seriously” or “used it up and threw it away”. There’s so much more to a marriage dynamic that you, as an outsider, never see, and I’m not going to keep myself married to an irresponsible person who is going to send me back to poverty just to maintain some status quo. How incredibly blessed you are to not know what it feels like to live in this situation.
I can see where you’re coming from. One of my girlfriends from high school is in husband #3 and with each wedding has a white dress and the whole shebang. On the one hand, good for her for finding love, but on the other hand…just chill out, it’s ok to love someone and not marry them straight away!
I guess I’m just perplexed by the whole divorce and remarry thing – maybe because it took me so bloody long to find my husband. I guess I feel like I don’t think this will ever happen for me again, so I better do what I can to make it work?
$450 Million.
so. much. money.
I’m baffled.
It’s sickening really. No one should have that much money.
THIS!!!
Yes. I was shocked to realize how much she inherited. Wow wow wow.
On another note, she seems like a well adjusted person, so I’m for her on this.
Also glad her mom didn’t get to blow away her money, surprisingly!
The money was probably locked down in a trust fund away from Courtney Love.
I’m sure she wants the best for her daughter but given her sketchy and crazy past I wouldn’t have trusted her either.
I’m not sure if she’s as well adjusted as we think she is. She pretty much always looks unhappy to me.
I don’t think you can ever be happy or well adjusted if you’re father killed himself when you were only a toddler and your mother has been labelled crazy and unstable ever since. I think she has turned out pretty well if we take into consideration that she has never had a real family. Compared to the Kardashian girls she is not vapid, shallow or a famewhore. She is probably trying to figure out who she is and her place in this world despite her status.
paolanquar-I agree with you. Considering everything she seems ok.
I think her suffering through a lack of her father in her life and her mom’s crazy has made her thoughtful and seeking stability. I applaud that she has a regular job even though she has millions. That speaks volumes all by itself.
I know, right? Even though I know better, I feel like all my problems would be solved if I had that much money!
Baffled too–had no clue he was worth that much
She seems pretty low key and not the typical spoiled rich brat of famous people and she truly is a “rich kid”. That IS a lot of money.
This divorce announcement is sooo unsurprising.
She had such a tough start in life with her parents, I always root for her to be ok. Hope this split isn’t too bad and the settlement is fair.
Hopefully her strong faith in Jesus will help her through.
Not a fan Dangles? I think she is lovely.
Does she do anything? Professionally? (Not being snarky, genuinely curious.)
Bean counter with the IRS.
Something to do with art. Visual artist, if I recall.
She’s a visual artist.
She goes to college and has had regular jobs believe it or not. She’s very intelligent, seems like a sweet person and from what I can tell has not allowed herself be just some layabout spoiled brat. A lot of pain and sh-t she didn’t ask for has come with this money, I don’t know her and can’t speak for her but I’m sure she’d give all that stupid money back just to have her father and anonymity back. She’s a smart girl I’m sure she would have made it on her own.
Sad for them that their marriage didn’t work out.
Aw, Franny. Wow, does she look so much like Kurt.
I actually hoped that these two would last – they were dating for quite a while before they got married. And Franny got such a raw deal with her parents that I’ve always just wanted the best for her. Then again, this guy has always struck me as a little bit of a Kurt wannabe. But maybe I’m wrong.
Damn it why couldn’t I have been born to rich parents?
If you had written that on a K Klan thread I’d agree.
But given the history of this girl, I find your comment distasteful.
“Distasteful”? I said nothing about her personal history in my comment, but stay reaching.
That doesn’t make a lot of sense to me.
I feel you.
I know. I realize having THAT much money is a whole new set of problems, but from where I’m sitting now, it’s a set of problems I could deal with.
Just to NOT have to worry about money all the time would be a huge relief for me. Wouldn’t trade it for having had a solid and secure childhood but man, would it be awesome to have both 🙂
I know. My grandmother was offered a chance to buy an island off the coast of Florida for $12,000. Obviously a really long time ago. She said no, what would I do with that? Now the teeny lots sell for over a million each, empty. Nice going Meemaw.
Oh man…just another reason why we have to make time travel happen.
I would be buying up property like crazy around my ‘hood if I had the money for it.
I don’t know. Rich, mentally stable, loving parents are in short supply. I think having a lot of money makes a large number of people turn into self-absorbed megalomaniacs. I was born to rich parents, but one of them was abusive and the other chose to look the other way. Now that I’m an adult I don’t take their money or have much a relationship with them. I would trade you for normal parents TBH.
Poor Frances, I definitely think she married despite her young age to try to build a solid, supportive family for herself as an alternative to the hand she was dealt as a child.
450 mil? And done nothing to deserve it. People work their whole lives and will never see even a quarter of a million and yet these kids don’t work or do anything and are sitting on a fortune. So frustrating.😧
frustrating? seriously? if her father had that money and he left it to her – it belongs to her, end stop. her dad killed himself and her mother is derelict drug addict. her life was spent in and out of foster care which despite being with various family members was probably inconsistent and confusing. i’d say she’s earned it. ever wonder if she would rather have a father, normal life or a mother who actually loved her?
Well said, thank you.
I thought she spend most of her childhood being raised by her grandmother (Kurts mother)? I think Courtney does love her daughter but loves herself first.
+1 Well said, lizzie.
The working class seems to be stuck in the working class mindset for some reason. Believe it or not, not everyone has to work for a living.
Seriously what is it with these comments?
Money comes from somewhere. Kurt was a public figure and a musician and his death at a young age launched him into icon-status there has been (and I’m sure continues to be) a lot of money to be made from that. If we can guarantee nothing else from the man it was that he wanted her cared for and that was the only thing he could give her.
Her having money she inherited doesn’t have anything to do with anyone else. That money brought her a lot of suffering I wouldn’t touch with a ten foot pole. Same with most of these celebs. In a vacuum their money sounds great, then I think about their life/sacrifices/public mistakes and I’m happier with my status.
+1
Deserve? How strange to think that way. Rich people have children and often leave their money to them. That’s life. She didn’t choose to be born but it’s her lot in life and it came with a high price.
This is kinda sad. I’m no fan of young marriage, but 5 years is an eternity at 23,,so he was family to her, and I liked the thought that she had someone to depend on in her life.
At the time she probably thought she met her life partner. Unfortunately, you don’t know what the other is thinking or how they feel over the long term. I met my husband when I was 18 and he was 25. And we’re still together 11 years later. But honestly, if he wanted to leave tomorrow, that’s OK with me because I’m secure in myself and juSt want us both to be happy in life. I’m thinking this is probably what happened with them and I highly doubt this guy would go after her estate. She is offering spousal support so I don’t think anything malicious is going on. I wish them both the best. And yes, she is so beautiful!
I also don’t get the starter marriage thing. I married young–21. But I was a recent college graduate, and my husband had already started his career. It hasn’t always been easy, but it’s been very worth it. Our 25th anniversary is this year.
I guess mine could have been a starter marriage, but I’m glad it wasn’t.
Anastasia, congratulations to you! Your key words: “It hasn’t always been easy….” is the experience many young people (late teens, early 20s) who enter into marriage fail to take into consideration for whatever reason. Human relationships are NOT easy, yet most marriage vows state, “For better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and health…” and, thus, an expectation is made. A better understanding of what they’re getting into could help. It is all so complicated because both parties bring experiences (learned behaviors) into a relationship that will affect how they handle the ups and downs.
These days it’s possible to receive counseling from an objective outsider prior to marriage. It forces you to look at your relationship from other perspectives. Getting married at a younger age, it’s hard to consider all that marriage encompasses. My son and his g.f. of four years started “couples counseling” about five months ago and I didn’t get it. I am glad to read so many viewpoints in this thread because there are some valuable insights. (I wish I could send it to them.) I’d like to thank everyone who has commented for putting their sh*t out there because this is a touchy subject. I really wish Frances all the luck in the world because it seems like she’s experiencing some personal growth, and since there are no children involved in this break-up both parties will be just fine.
This article does not say anything about the young man actually trying to get any of her fortune, only that Frances would be willing to give spousal support. Isn’t is possible that he was finally someone who gave her unconditional love and support after the horrible childhood she had? My interpretation is that others are advising her to protect what is hers (as she should) because she didn’t take into consideration what her liability could be, but otherwise the break-up is amicable.
WTF is a starter marriage? I’m not religious at all. However, don’t get married unless you expect a lifelong commitment. It isn’t the next step in a relationship.
marriage between to very young adults that is viewed more like a preparation than a lasting commitment. Posh people especially use this term in a somewhat condescending way.
“Starter marriage” is generally used tongue in cheek. A send-up of the term “starter house” that people buy before upgrading to something bigger and better. It’s not a real thing.
I know most will disagree, but she’s had some extensive work done. And it’s a shame b/c she was so cute before she messed with her face.
No one will disagree. She has an entirely new face.
I just did a before and after search to remind myself and it really is sad how much she’s changed. She’s only 23!
“Classic starter marriage” – this is exactly why I think getting married shouldn’t be so quick and easy to do. Pre-marriage counseling and a mandatory waiting period before getting a marriage license should be required.
I hope their divorce is amicable. She doesn’t need any more drama in her life.
“Pre-marriage counseling and a mandatory waiting period before getting a marriage license should be required.”
Out of curiousity why do you think this should be required? Most couples already know each other longer than marriages in the past and marriage is a a freedom of choice. It’s unfortunate it doesn’t work out for some but it seems wrong to force some legislation.
I had pre-marital counseling for my first marriage because our minister required it. It didn’t change a thing.
Right? It could be helpful, but required? That would be like putting a mandate on feelings. It’s more important a person know themselves first.
So my question is how on earth did Kurt Cobain leave her so much money? I mean he wasn’t really alive long enough after Nirvana took off to amass that type of fortune. I’d have to guess its royalties from the music and good investment by her executor? Still it seems like a crazy amount doesn’t it? Most musicians make their money from touring. I wasn’t into grunge but my first boyfriend was. I think Kurt wrote all the music yes? Writing def makes you money since those royalties pay out a lot more I believe?
Ok so a quick google search told me that nirvana’s catalog still makes a boatload of money. So I guess that’s where the 450 million came from.
Kurt probably makes more money now than he did when he was alive. (Total guess, btw).
Work with a lot of younger people (under age 25) and they like Nirvana. They’ve had a resurgence in the last few years and their music is still being bought by newer generations. Their music is still selling.
It seems the value of the property she inherited more than twenty years ago is now 450 mil. She probably hasn’t spent much of the proproperty when growing up. So it has been invested all these years, and with 10% rate of return the property would have grown 1.10^20=6.7 times, so original property only needed to be 67 mil.
Or something like that. I recommend reading the Thomas Piketty book on capitalism for everyone wondering stuff about inherited wealth etc.
I heard that he left like a billion. Part of it was for his daughter, the rest for CL. And Nirvana is still making money. She is good, money wise, forever. As for having junkies as parents, that is the tragic part, but that money can bring you much therapy.
I’m SO shocked.
Frances and her ex look more like siblings than husband and wife.
If you are that rich you need to marry someone on your financial level, or someone wealthier. Otherwise it makes no sense to get married, might as well just be in a long term relationship and maybe even live together but marriage is too much risk for someone so wealthy.
Then you’d be at risk of becoming common-law spouses which I believe carries more risk than a formal documentation marriage. I sort of agree with the like marrying like idea, more chances for everyone to get out of the relationship with what they came in with.
I know someone who had a really good job. She married a dude who had nothing. He literally came into the marriage with an empty bank account and promises of going back to school to further his “career”. This dumb girl put her house, all assets, bank accounts as “joint”. He know owns half of everything. He is a real jerk, has alienated her from her family, yet she stays with him because she doesn’t want to lose everything she’s worked for, and doesn’t want to provide spousal support to a bum. Yes, if you can, definitely marry someone on the same economical level as you. It will be much better in the long run.
Damn sucks for her. Definitely can’t get into a relationship with someone who has ‘nothing’. Too much risk involved.
I agree with you. Don’t get why rich marry at all tho. 450 Million is too much money to be so reckless with. Why was there no prenup anyway? That money has been invested and protected by a team of ppl so I would think they would tell her to insist on one. Maybe they did and she didn’t listen.
I don’t understand why he should get ANYthing. UGH!
ALREADY?
You know what? I’m sure she would trade every dollar of that money for her father or a good upbringing. Money does not buy you happiness. If you think it does, you have never had enough money to learn that it doesn’t.
Money can’t take away loneliness, particularly as wealth attracts false friendships that leave a person both bitter and more alone. We are social animals more than we are creatures of comfort, and money can’t buy an honest loving connection.
i was married at 23 to someone much older than me, and we are still married 24 years later. I think it depends on the couple, and their commitment to working to stay together. I know people married in their 20’s 30’s and 40’s that didn’t last. My grandmother remarried in her 80’s and they divorced. Marriage isn’t a cakewalk at any age.
Certainly though she should protect her assets.
Hopefully she makes better decisions moving forward. It’s lame for anyone to not have enough foresight to avoid a 2-year marriage.
There’s eight years between then, which is significant since Frances was only 18 when they first got together. Basically just a baby. He was probably her first and only real relationship. Sometimes that works out, but most of the time it doesn’t.
At least Frances had the good sense to protect her inheritance. I think it’s fair of her to be open to giving him spousal support, given they were together for five years and she’s worth almost half a billion dollars.
Before plastic surgery she looked exactly like her mother
Speaking in regards to the inheritance, Nirvana is timeless. Will always be a money maker. There was a kid on the train here in NYC a few weeks ago wearing a Nirvana t-shirt and dressed grunge. I was in my professional wear and thought “I will pull my Doc Martens’s out from 1994 right fkn now and show you how it’s truly done”. It was cool then, and now. They will forever make an appearance in our culture.
divorce is a common thing nowdays. couple dont know how to compromise each other
OMG, this girl really is a beautiful young woman. I was watching the Larry Flynt movie the other day, and her mom was so pretty. And she was great as an actress. To bad Courtney went down the tubes. Such talent, so sad. But I wish Frances all the best. She seems like such a sweet level headed woman.