Alanis Morissette got a haircut, looks like one of Elizabeth’s alts on The Americans


Above is the last known photo of Alanis Morissette before getting a haircut. (I made that up, it’s just the last photo she posted to Instagram with long hair.) Her hair was bleached blonde and it looked really fried. Look at the ends, she would need to go up to at least a chin length bob to fix all that. Well Alanis did one better, she got a short haircut and just went back to being a brunette.

Lately I’ve been on this 80s kick where I’m wearing vintage 80s pieces from Goodwill, often with white Reeboks and sometimes with leg warmers and maybe a scrunchie in my hair. It’s rare that I have the nerve to put it all together, which is why I adore this look. Yes it can look frumpy but you know it does and you’re still rocking it. It takes some nerve to wear round glasses and unflattering clothes like that. That hair is a commitment. Take the iPad out of the frame and she could call this a throwback photo and we wouldn’t know the difference. (Except that she looks older. It’s the styling though!)

Below is the photo of Alanis which all the outlets are using to illustrate her new pixie cut. It’s not very flattering but again I’m here for her retro style.
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As mentioned in the title, she reminds me of one of Elizabeth’s alter egos on The Americans, the woman she played with the short hair when she had to pretend to be her husband’s sister. (That’s not a major spoiler! Watch that show on Amazon Prime if you haven’t, it’s well worth it.) This is the look I’m talking about.

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You see it too right? Alanis needs some Sally Jessy Raphael glasses to complete this look. I’d also like to see her puff the sh-t out of her hair. Alanis is working on the Jagged Little Pill musical. It’s currently in rehearsals and will premiere at the American Repertory Theater in Cambridge, Massachusetts, in May. It’s a new story based on a book by Diablo Cody and Alanis wrote all the lyrics. She’s really feeling the 80s and it’s coming out in her style. Check out her theme earrings. I’m here…

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Photos credit: Getty and Instagram

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58 Responses to “Alanis Morissette got a haircut, looks like one of Elizabeth’s alts on The Americans”

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  1. It’sJustBlanche says:

    Wow. That’s awful. The thing about retro 80s, nerdy fashion is that you have to be really attractive to pull it off and not look terrible.

  2. deets says:

    Alanis. Put down the glasses. Alison Janney already got the role.

    • happy girl says:

      Gold. @deets

    • Mumzy says:

      But she added a glasses chain that looks like the braces my son just had removed from his teeth….scratch that..his braces were cute…maybe repurposed bike chain? (And I’d only say this anonymously cause AM is badass and I’m a slow runner)

      We are putting the B in CB today, friends!

  3. manda says:

    She looks like she did when she was a teenager on You Can’t Do That on Television! (I’m an old)

    • Snazzy says:

      OMG I totally forgot about that show!

    • TaniaOG says:

      Yes, that’s what I wanted to say as well. Pretty sure she had short hair then. The show with the slime!

    • Yup, Me says:

      I loved that show!

      But this is a terrible look all around. If it’s a commentary on the bullshit expectations and norms around women and femininity and attractiveness and challenging the status quo, then let’s start talking. But if she picked that cut, those glasses and that outfit and then put them all together because she thinks they’re cute, then she needs a good friend to tell her otherwise

    • N.L. says:

      +1

      And not in a great way.

  4. Char says:

    Maybe she is a huge fan of the show, the spy game and the wigs.

  5. KNy says:

    In the header pic, I thought it was Roy Scheider from Jaws. She looks better without the glasses.

  6. queenE says:

    awful

  7. Yeahright says:

    This makes her look like her husband’s mother.

    • Milla says:

      Who cares? She’s an accomplished woman in her own right.

      • Yeahright says:

        Who cares?
        Erm …Apparently anyone who comments on a gossip site?
        Why are you here if you don’t care?

      • Spring says:

        I’m here because I care about Alanis’s creative endeavors and her mental-health outreach. And I love that she opts for how she wants to look, rather than organizing her choices around how others will judge her appearance.

      • Milla says:

        @yeahright
        I love Alanis as a musician. Of course i wanna read about her, maybe learn something about her new music or just remind myself of how much joy she gave me as a singer and songwriter.

        Also as a feminist, i will defend a woman who never cared for her looks. She was not fashionista, she wasn’t style icon, she was not a model, she doesn’t go to fashion shows, she doesn’t do magazine covers, she’s a musician and that’s her legacy. Some other artists use fashion as a statement, but not her. Of course i will comment on rihannas choices, she makes clothes and makeup. Very different. Bjork, madonna, Bey, all use fashion.

      • Yes says:

        I think it’s very cool-she can pull it off. Few celebs can make a bonfire out if boring- she makes any trend It.

  8. DesertReal says:

    She looks like Amelia Earhart briefly resurfaced in the 80’s before vanishing again, with a pair of sh**ty glasses in tow.

    I am not here for that look.
    At all.

  9. Aloe Vera says:

    Holy moly

  10. Kittylouise says:

    The headlines on this site are really funny but this one is the best of the lot – I really cackled. Thinking of Elizabeth’s alts first one I thought of was Philip’s ‘sister’. I love that show – it absolutely brilliant and I don’t want it to end.

  11. Beth says:

    That’s bad. Those glasses make her look a thousand times worse

  12. Anguishedcorn says:

    Wow, that’s bad.

  13. Sensible says:

    I love this so much. She has no effs to give and I am here for that. Plus yes to the earrings, they are fabulous.

    • Adele Dazeem says:

      Agreed! I love it! I’ve always had a soft spot for her since You Can’t Do that on Television. Love it! Go Alanis, be your weird ass self. There are people that love you for it!

      • NYGal says:

        Similar haircut what she had when she was on “you can’t do that on television “.
        I loved her hair back then. Not quite the same now.

  14. boredblond says:

    I think the change back to brunette was a good one, but that cut! Ouch.

  15. NEENA ZEE says:

    She looks like Toni Collette to me

  16. Deanne says:

    I actually love 80’s retro style, but I realize I have a limit and this is it. The hair with those glasses ages her horribly. She looks like Tonya Harding’s Mother.She looks thrilled with it though and that’s always good. She obviously loves it.

  17. Nev says:

    Love Alanis. Amazing artist. Under Rug Swept is a top ten album for me.

  18. Ankhel says:

    Bill Gates hasn’t aged much, has he?

    • Chaine says:

      hahahahaha you hit the nail on the head! This is the most incredibly awful makeover I’ve ever seen. The Princess Diana knockoff hairstyle, the hideous glasses, the frumpy clothes… before she just looked like a young woman who needed her split ends trimmed, now she looks like she’s in her 50’s.

  19. khaveman says:

    Just terrible. What’s with the granny glasses as well? I like cute pixie cuts, but this is really the worst one I have seen in a long time.

  20. Spring says:

    I enjoy Alanis, her IDGAF quirkiness, and her commitment to learning (and helping others learn) about the challenge of being in that group known as highly sensitive people (HSPs) with easily overstimulated nervous systems, as well educating herself and others on healing from the devastating effects of trauma.

    I admire her commitment to doing what interests her rather than chasing after fame, youth, looks, and other trappings that can’t bring contentment and peace to one’s life. Personally, I’d love to be far more concerned with what’s comfy and fun while divesting from the overemphasis on appearance, weight, clothing, material goods, worry about what others think, etc. that were such unhappy obsessions in my family of origin. Good for Alanis and everyone else who shows up just being themselves. My major issues are flapping around on the clothesline here for all to see, LOL.

    • EG says:

      I totally agree! She is a great role model for young women–someone who has always followed her creative impulses and shared her authentic voice. She rules–I don’t care what her hair looks like!

    • TheRickestRick says:

      I really like all you said here and I totally agree-
      and I can see I’m totally alone in this – but I like it! I love pixies cuts and I think she can pull one off, and I think she looks very cute. Then again I’ve always found her to be very attractive.
      I think this look is 1000x more attractive than filler face, fake blonde lion’s mane extensions, inch thick clearly drawn on eyebrows, slap absolutely spackled to the face, you know, most of what seems to be considered “attractive” these days!!! I’ll take her look any day over that!!

  21. Lizzie says:

    her skin looks lovely. she is aging beautifully.

  22. greenmonster says:

    It looks so much better than the long blond hair.

  23. slowsnow says:

    Love this, unashamedly. She looks happy.
    ALANIS LET YOUR FREAK FLAG FLY!!!!! (AND CB TOO!) 😉

  24. Delta Juliet says:

    Apparently I’m the only one who finds this look atrocious?

    • elle says:

      It’s awful. It reminds me of the one time I had short hair and discovered that a short cut on awful hair is much worse than long, awful hair. You can’t ponytail, clip or bun it away and all of its bad tendencies come out to play.

  25. Harryg says:

    It’s Molly Ringwald!

  26. Jailnurse says:

    Hideous. She’s not once looked put together. Even in the 90s, she always looked like a slob.

  27. Kelsey says:

    It’s literally the same haircut she had on You Can’t Do That on Television.

  28. LittlefishMom says:

    She looks like the new version of Heavens Gate.

  29. Jayna says:

    Oh, my. That’s all I will say.

  30. emma peel says:

    That is the most unflattering celebrity photograph I’ve ever seen.

  31. Ladyhands says:

    I think she just bought progressive insurance and is turning into her mom