The divorce heard ’round the world has been finalized, according to TMZ. As we told you yesterday, a final settlement had been determined with the help of an arbitrator, and all that remained was to get the settlement in front of a judge, which happened earlier today. The documents have been signed – “Jon and Kate” are officially no more as a union. That’s all, folks! Early rumors say that Jon, as predicted, got creamed in the court proceedings and will have to dole out some major dough in child support for his eight children. In fact, he is already reportedly freaking out over the payments, especially since TLC has his balls in a vice grip over his blatant breach of contract.

TMZ has learned … It’s official — Jon & Kate Gosselin are divorced.

Judge Arthur Tilson has signed the final papers, making Jon and Kate officially single.

Mark Momjian, Kate’s lawyer, tells TMZ, under the agreement, “Our client will continue to reside with all eight of her children in the former marital home.”

As for Kate, she says, “I am very relieved that our divorce has been finalized, and I look forward to the New Year, focusing on our children.” Kate calls the divorce “challenging,” and says she will now focus on “restructuring our lives.”

As for who got what, Momjian simply says, “We are very pleased with the final outcome.”

Judge Tilson inked the docs after the arbitrator came down with his ruling on how Jon and Kate’s property will be divided.

We’ve learned under the arbitrator’s award, Jon must make huge child support payments — we’re told 5 figures a month. And here’s the problem. TLC has now shut down Jon’s ability to take outside jobs. The irony — he did himself in.

We’ve also learned Jon was charged every penny of the $235,000 that he withdrew from their joint account. That amount was deducted from his piece of the settlement.

As for Jon’s claim that Kate should be docked for money she withdrew … we’ve learned Jon struck out. The arbitrator determined every penny she withdrew was for the benefit of the kids.

Under the terms of the divorce decree, Kate has primary custody and Jon gets visitation — both Jon and Kate agreed to that in advance. And, they agreed, neither party would get spousal support.

Score a big one for Mark Momjian, Kate’s lawyer.

[From TMZ]

Radar Online has even more details, saying that Jon is “struggling” with the settlement terms and has no idea how he will make these five-figure child support payments. Hmm, maybe he should have thought of that before he decided to engage in multiple affairs, steal from the marital bank accounts, cross TLC and take career advice from Michael Lohan!

We told you so! RadarOnline.com exclusively reported on Thursday that Jon and Kate Gosselin’s divorce decree would be made official within 24 hours – and it has.

What’s more, RadarOnline.com has learned that Kate is absolutely thrilled with the settlement
and has gotten everything she wanted including the house and most of the cash.

Jon, meantime, is struggling both financially, and emotionally. With his ability to earn any cash stifled by his ongoing legal dispute with cable giant TLC, and his relationship woes with on again off again girlfriend Hailey Glassman, it’s tough times for the dad of 8.

Mark Momjian, Kate’s co-counsel tells RadarOnline.com, “Our client will continue to reside with all eight of her children in the former marital home. This was Kate’s primary focus from the very start of the case, and we are very pleased with the final outcome.”

[From Radar]

Does this mean that “Bitch-and-Douche-a-Palooza” is finally over? I certainly hope so. If I never see Jon Gosselin’s greasy, bloated smirk splashed across a tabloid cover again, then, well, I don’t need any Christmas gifts. And as for Kate – unfortunately, we haven’t seen the last of her, not by a long shot. Ms. Ballbuster will be annoying us for many moons to come – all because she played footsie with TLC instead of embarrassing them and pissing them off. I guess she really did turn out to be a pretty smart businesswoman, didn’t she? Now, let’s see if she can pick up some slack in the “Good parenting” department.

Promotional image of Jon & Kate courtesy of Babble.com.