I told you guys! I told you that Kim Kardashian and Miles Austin were close to being done. And now you get to tell me how lame I am for even caring who Kim is dating. Go ahead, I’ll wait. Are you done? So, Kim treated her very pretty boy Miles Austin like dirt, and left him in the lurch, according to In Touch Weekly. Guess how they know? They’ve got a source who claims that Kim is still bumpin’ fuglies with Cristiano Ronaldo. AGAIN. Even though he’s got a girlfriend and baby-mama drama and he’s kind of strange and orange and jacked.

On August 1, Kim Kardashian beamed in the stands at the Dallas Cowboys’ football practice, watching her boyfriend, Miles Austin, as if he were the only man on earth. Yet two days later, as the bootylicious star strolled through the lobby of The Beverly Hills Hotel with soccer player Cristiano Ronaldo, it seemed as if Miles was the last thing on Kim’s mind.

Cristiano, who has become somewhat of a ladies man, not only has a girlfriend — model Irina Shayk, 24 — he is also the father of a baby boy, whose mother has not been named.

But the friend says none of that makes a difference to the Keeping Up With the Kardashians star.

“She is boy-crazy and always looking for the next man — someone with more fame and money than her current guy,” the friend explains.

[From In Touch Weekly]

Of course, this may not have happened. Of course it may have happened, but just because they spoke to each either, doesn’t mean they were f-cking… although it’s harder to make that case, honestly. Considering his pick up line is “You, me, f-ck, f-ck” I think we can safely say that 1)Kim and Ronaldo are probably still boning occasionally and 2) Kim is a f-cking idiot.

By the way, one of Ronaldo’s one-night stands (more like one-hour-stands) has sold her story about their hookup. Jasmine Lennard is the girl, and she wrote a first-hand account of what Ronaldo was like on their boning session for The Daily Mirror here. It’s kind of boring, actually. She doesn’t give any juicy details, like what kind of dirty sexts Ronaldo sent her, or what it looked like, or what it tasted like (What? You were wondering too!).

Okay, I’m starting to think Cristiano Ronaldo is the Portuguese Gerard Butler. The man seems like a total dog, but he also seems totally unapologetic about it, which is somewhat admirable. I mean, if you’re going to f-ck everything that moves, why not be honest about it? So the mystery baby-mama of Cristiano Ronaldo’s newborn son has been revealed, sort of. We still don’t know her name, but The Mirror reports that she was a penniless American waitress who Ronaldo met on a New York City layover. They had a one night stand, and she got pregnant. She went to Ronaldo’s management team, who went to Ronaldo’s mother, who worked out the current arrangement, where – after the paternity test confirmed – the girl would give birth, and the child would come to live with Ronaldo and his family. The waitress also got paid 10 million pounds for the whole deal – approximately $15.3 million. Guess what Ronaldo’s come-on to the waitress was? “Me, you, f-ck, f-ck.” Oh, you sweet talker.

The mother of Cristiano Ronaldo’s baby is a penniless American waitress who the football star seduced with the line: “Me, you, f*** f***.”

But his chat-up line was so blunt, she didn’t understand it. So Ronaldo resorted to drawing a love heart on a misted-up window and said: “Me, you, kiss!” Then he whisked her back to his hotel for a one-night stand which left the girl pregnant – and Ronaldo with a £10million paternity bill.

Most of the world believed that Ronaldo had actually used a surrogate mother to have his baby – but the Sunday Mirror can reveal the truth of his sudden unexpected fatherhood. And how, after hearing the baby was his, he told friends “I feel like Boris Becker” – a reference to the tennis star who fathered a love-child after having sex just once in a London restaurant – which cost him £20m.

The £200,000-a-week striker used his best friend to help broker an exclusive paternity deal in New York, supervised by his fearsome mother Dolores Aveiro, to bring the baby back to Portugal. Ronaldo has told friends he won’t tell the boy the identity of his mother until his 18th birthday.

Football fans reacted with disbelief when Ronaldo, whose conquests include socialite Paris Hilton and reality TV star Imogen Thomas, suddenly announced on July 3 that he had a son. In a cryptic message posted on Facebook, he told how the baby’s mother wanted to remain private and declared: “My son will be under my exclusive guardianship.” He later said the baby had been named Cristiano after him. And the little boy’s mother has been paid a life-changing $15.1million to keep her identity confidential and to hand the child over to Ronaldo’s family.

Last summer, on a trip to Los Angeles that would see him hooking up with Paris Hilton, Ronaldo strutted into a restaurant and spotted the future mother of his son. A friend said: “Ronni looked the girl in the eye and said extremely directly: ‘Me, you, f*** f***.’

“She was taken aback and just said: ‘What!’ She didn’t actually understand what he meant. She was totally nonplussed. The window by his table was steamed up, so he drew a love heart on it with his finger. Then he said, ‘Me, you, kiss,’ and the penny dropped.

“That’s typical Ronni – he pretends his English is terrible when it suits him, and he comes straight to the point. It was just yet another one-night stand and Ronnie assumed he would never see her again.” But after finding out she was pregnant, and convinced Ronaldo was the only possible father, the woman tracked him down through his agent, Jorge Mendes.
Mendes told Ronaldo, who immediately told his no-nonsense mother Dolores, 55, and sisters Elma, 34, and 33-year-old Liliana Cátia.

It was agreed that Ronaldo would give DNA for a paternity test once the baby was born and provide support for the mother and child if it proved to be his. The friend revealed: “Cristiano was told the result while he was away at the World Cup.” And then Dolores stepped in. The friend said: “Ronni is a multi-millionaire playboy, but when it comes to family, he’s very much his mother’s son. They are a close-knit, traditional Roman Catholic family and the minute paternity was established there was absolutely no doubt that Ronni would be doing the right thing. There was simply no question of him walking away. Even if he had wanted to, Dolores just would not have entertained it for one moment. This is her grandchild and there was only one option for the child’s upbringing – with her and her daughters in Portugal. The child’s mother would be properly provided for to enable her to live a life in keeping with the upbringing the child will have.”

“Ronni has not decided whether to involve the mother in his son’s life. He thinks he might tell him who she is. Dolores’s view is that if the child eventually decides to make contact with the mother, it is important she is living an affluent lifestyle. It would offend Dolores for the child to find his mother living in poverty. It’s a huge amount of money, but Ronni insists it’s not a big deal because he’s worth £100million and he’s got the best part of his career ahead of him still.”

Despite being voted FIFA Player of the Year in 2009 and moving to Real Madrid from Manchester United for a recordbreaking £80million last year, Ronaldo had a poor World Cup in South Africa. Tipped to be one of the mega-stars of the tournament, he scored just once in five games, prompting speculation about his indifferent form.

But his friend insisted: “Ronni said was pleased to become a father, even though he hadn’t planned to have the child. He hasn’t even told his closest friends who the mother is. I had guessed she was a Bunny Girl from Vegas, but she isn’t a well-known party girl or socialite. She had hardly a dime to her name until she was paid by Ronni.”

Meanwhile Ronaldo has shown no sign of curbing his womanising.

A source said: “This week he has on Facebook contacting women who will talk dirty. He is determined to be the best father he can – but he doesn’t equate that with having to settle down.”

This week the public got a glimpse of the child when the baby was rushed to hospital after suffering a mystery illness at home in the Algarve.

[From The Daily Mirror]

My favorite part is this line: “They are a close-knit, traditional Roman Catholic family and the minute paternity was established there was absolutely no doubt that Ronni would be doing the right thing.” The right thing, in this case, was apparently to pay the woman off and take her baby from her and set the baby up with the father’s mother and sister? BECAUSE THEY’RE CATHOLIC. Why do some Catholics believe in this salad bar of traditions? Like, Ronaldo will f-ck anything that moves and that’s okay, but when a girl gets knocked up, all of a sudden the Church gets involved in what’s wrong and right?

Ronaldo on July 9, 2010. Credit: Bauer-Griffin.

Cristiano Ronaldo really is a father now! According to multiple sources, his son was born about a month ago, and most people are saying that it was absolutely a surrogate thing. Ronaldo contracted out to an American too! Apparently, she’s a New Yorker, and Ronaldo has been in new York the past few days, spending time with his son and preparing to take him home. Ronaldo managed to keep his current girlfriend too – although many sources say that Ronaldo didn’t even tell Irina Shayk that he was going to be a father. Page Six paints the picture of a man on top of the world, who lacked the one thing that would make it all worth it: a baby. Are you buying it?

It looks like the rumor that Portuguese soccer stud Cristiano Ronaldo used a surrogate mother is true. The superstar — who was recently featured nearly naked on the cover of Vanity Fair — revealed on Twitter over the weekend that he’s a father to a baby boy who will be under his “exclusive guardianship.”

According to sources, the mother of the child, who Ronaldo said “prefers to have her identity kept confidential,” recently gave birth to the boy in New York. Ronaldo arrived over the weekend after Portugal was eliminated in the World Cup.

Ronaldo is planning to raise his son in Spain, where he plays for Real Madrid. His sister, Katia Aveiro, told a Portuguese newspaper that the baby, weighing 9 pounds, 8 ounces, is the spitting image of his brown-eyed, dark-haired daddy. Ronaldo was said to have planned to have the child with the mystery woman months before he met his current girlfriend, Russian model Irina Shayk.

The handsome athlete wants a baby, said a source close to him, because he “has millions, has a great career, but he didn’t have a child.” Ronaldo, who lost his father five years ago, is close with his mother, Dolores Aveiro, who sources say will likely take care of the boy with him.

Despite the bombshell, Shayk and Ronaldo have been inseparable since he landed in New York on Friday. Yesterday, they were spotted shopping on Madison Avenue before Ronaldo returned to his hotel to watch the Netherlands beat Uruguay, 3-2 in the World Cup semifinals.

Shayk remains supportive of him but has no comment, according to her rep. Postings on her Facebook fan page earlier this week claiming she was “devastated” were fraudulent, added the rep.

“It seems Irina is still rolling with it. It’s a hard thing to stomach because every day you read something new about the situation,” said the source close to Ronaldo. His rep didn’t get back to us.

[From Page Six]

I’ll buy that his mom and his sister are probably going to be raising the baby and that Ronaldo will probably be more like a “cool uncle” rather than a proper father. But we’ll see. I have to admit, if Page Six’s sources are correct about Ronaldo’s reasoning, I was rather touched. Sure, it would have been interesting if Ronaldo actually chose the old-fashioned route and found a nice girl, got her knocked up and spent serious time with the mom during her pregnancy, etc. But I’m not going to knock a guy for having just as strong biological/parental urges as a woman. (Some) men get broody around babies too. Maybe Ronaldo just wanted to be a dad without any baby-mama drama.

By the way, who is this other piece of orange beef jerky? Is that Ronaldo’s secret boyfriend? Hm?

Ronaldo and a friend on July 7, 2010 in NYC. Credit: Bauer-Griffin.

Well, this is strange news. Over the weekend, Portuguese soccer star Cristiano Ronaldo announced on Facebook that he was a father – and that he wasn’t going to announce the baby-mama’s name. And that he has “exclusive guardianship” of his newborn son. What the hell? This is beyond Jude Lawesque shenanigans. People Magazine is now reporting the story, so although there were concerns that Ronaldo’s page had been hacked and the story was false (his Facebook page was suspended it seems, after the announcement), it’s looking more and more like it’s the truth:

It’s a boyyyyyyyyy!

Soccer star Cristiano Ronaldo announced on Saturday that he is a proud new papa.

“It is with great joy and emotion that I inform I have recently become father to a baby boy,” the Team Portugal player writes on his Facebook page.

The identity of the baby’s mother has not been revealed, and Ronaldo, 25 – who once linked with Kim Kardashian and counts nearly 6.5 million fans on the social networking site – says that he will he will raise the boy on his own.

“As agreed with the baby’s mother, who prefers to have her identity kept confidential,” he writes, “my son will be under my exclusive guardianship.”

No further information was provided. 35,623 of his Facebook fans “liked” this announcement.

[From People]

The Daily Mail reports that Portugese sources claim that the baby-mama is American, that she gave birth a month ago, and that Ronaldo’s family are still mid-way through formally bringing the kid to Portugal.

The first thought is that this is some kind of Ricky Martin thing, right? That Ronaldo is a gay man who wanted to become a father, so he contracted his “essence” out to an American girl for her to carry the baby? Except that I do think Ronaldo is straight. Isn’t he some kind of massive womanizer? So maybe the baby is a product of a one-night stand or something, and the woman just didn’t want to deal with the baby? I have no idea.

UPDATE: The Daily Mail reports that Ronaldo’s sister claims that the child was conceived with a surrogate. So it’s more Ricky Martin than Jude Law.

Header: Ronaldo on June 25, 2010. Credit: WENN.

Everyone thinks Cristiano Ronaldo is a major douche, right? He’s boned illustrious women like… Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian, plus some of Europe’s finest hookers, models and assorted football fans. In short, he enjoys his stardom and has basically no standards other than “no fatties.” Well, I still can’t hate him completely. Because he has a really insane body that is so lovely, I can barely even concentrate. These are some of Ronaldo’s new ads for Armani underwear (and jeans). The ads were done in Madrid. But who is looking at the set pieces, when there’s that big piece right there?

See, I just have a hard time believing that a dude with a body like this would be ALL bad. Perhaps he’s just naughty? And yes, I have a problem, I know. Sometimes I go for really sleazy guys. If dudes can gawk at Megan Fox, I can enjoy Ronaldo just on pure eye candy level. Here’s one more, and older Armani ad:

Sigh… does this make you want to root for Portugal in tomorrow’s game, against Cote d’Ivoire? I’ll watch…

Photos courtesy of Towleroad.

This is kind of disappointing, except for all of the hot, half-naked men. Vanity Fair’s June issue is devoted to soccer (or “football”) and the World Cup, which starts soon, in June as a matter of fact. The complete online article is here, but Vanity Fair also released an excerpt and a couple of photos. I know the cover is poor quality, I’ll change it out when I find a better one. Here you go (there’s video of Annie Leibovitz’s photo shoot at the bottom):

In 38 days, it begins. The World Cup captivates more people around the globe than any other event, sporting or otherwise. Every four years, in pubs and corporate boardrooms, thatched huts and flophouses, fans of “the Beautiful Game” gather around televisions and transistor radios—and now, for the deep of pocket, iPhones and 3-D flat screens—to cheer for their heroes. They watch and listen by the billions, holding their breath at every corner kick, falling to their knees or leaping for joy at every goal scored. That this year’s tournament is in South Africa, where apartheid was the law of the land until 1994, only adds to the heightened sense of celebration—this is about a whole lot more than just soccer.

For the June issue of Vanity Fair, Annie Leibovitz set out to capture some of the sport’s biggest stars, including Portugal’s Cristiano Ronaldo, Ivory Coast’s Didier Drogba, Cameroon’s Samuel Eto’o, and Brazil’s Kaká. Leibovitz’s portraits are, well, revealing. And underwear has never looked so patriotic. In America, these men might not enjoy the same name recognition as the stars of the N.F.L.—that game that we call football—but for most of the planet, they are more than just showstoppers. They are gods.

A. A. Gill, in his accompanying June-issue essay, captures just how important football (don’t you dare call it “soccer,” he warns) and the World Cup are to the 6.8 billion of us who live on Planet Earth. “Football took to the world pitch at about the same time as the modern independent nation-state,” Gill writes. “After a flag, a national anthem, and a press release decrying Yankee imperialism, the next thing newly minted nations do is build a stadium and come up with a national grudge match.”

Grudges old and new will be settled (or worsened) beginning on June 11, as South Africa opens the World Cup in Soweto against Mexico. Must-see games abound from there on, with England vs. U.S.A. (June 12) and most any matchup from the so-called Group of Death—Ivory Coast vs. Portugal (June 15), Brazil vs. Ivory Coast (June 20), Portugal vs. Brazil (June 25)—topping the list from the opening round.

You don’t have to be a footie fan to enjoy the tournament. (How many of you follow swimming when it’s not the Olympics and Michael Phelps?) To keep up with all the news and festivities, check in every day with our soccer football blog, Fair Play, which will be filing from South Africa . And as you’re watching and reading, remember the closing quote to Gill’s essay, from the great Scottish player and coach Bill Shankly: “Some people believe football is a matter of life and death. I can assure you it is much, much more important than that.”

[From Vanity Fair]

Sort of interesting. Wasn’t it at the last World Cup that Frenchman Zinedine Zidane head-butted that Brazilian Italian dude? Yes. That was kind of awesome, and if soccer players promised more stuff like that, maybe American audiences would finally embrace soccer completely – although I’ve read it is becoming more popular here.

Anyway, the video is great – and what’s really nice is to see how friendly players of different nationalities are with each other. Plus, most of them are smoking hot, with insane bodies. Swoon.

All images courtesy of Vanity Fair. Cover courtesy of Just Jared.

Several days ago, it was widely reported that Kim Kardashian hooked up with Cristiano Ronaldo while she was in Spain. At the time, I didn’t really think anything of it, mostly because I was too entranced by Kim’s “tweaked” face, and because the reporting of the hookup made it sound like it was literally a one night stand. Not even – they f-cked during the day, and Ronaldo made Kim leave his house after a few hours. Anyway, most of the tabloids now have stories about Kim and her new “dangerous” romance. “Dangerous” because Ronaldo is something of an international douche it seems, and he’s going to break poor little Kim’s heart. Here’s Life & Style’s version, who put this nonsense on their damn cover:

Things between Kim Kardashian and new love interest, International soccer stud Cristiano Ronaldo, may be getting steamy but some close to Kim hope the two don’t get too serious. Life & Style has learned Cristiano has an arrest record (charges were dropped) and a reputation for being a massive playboy with a taste for call girls and group sex. Cristiano has reportedly hired prostitutes for group-sex parties on several occasions. When asked how many women the soccer star has slept with, an ex-girlfriend of Cristiano’s laughingly guessed 80,000!

“Cristiano loves to party,” British journalist Debbie Manley, who has followed his scandalous personal life, tells Life & Style. “He’s gone out with paid female escorts. Like a lot of European men, he doesn’t see a problem with that, I don’t think.”

In the past, he’s been known to have friends text women on his behalf to arrange hotel trysts. After having fun, Cristiano leaves solo and asks the woman to wait an hour before she exits, Manley claims. The reason? He doesn’t want to risk getting photographed with her.

“Women throw themselves at his feet,” another insider tells Life & Style. “The last time Cristiano was in LA, I saw three different women trying to push their phone numbers on him at once! He’s a huge celebrity, and he’s gorgeous too.”

And while Cristiano is a fun, sexy rebound, he’s not boyfriend material.

“Cristiano is wild,” adds another insider. “I just don’t think he’ll ever settle down and be faithful to one woman.”

[From Life & Style]

Ugh. For goodness sake. Either Kim knew what she was getting into (likely) when she hooked up with him – ONCE, or she didn’t know but now does, and will likely never see him again. Why the need to feel so protective over Kim? She’s not a girl. She’s a grown woman, nearly 30 years old. If she wants to fly to Europe to get laid, let her.

CB and I were just talking about why this one hookup has garnered so much press. I theorized that it’s because tabloids are lazy, and writing about the Kardashians is so f-cking easy. CB replied: “Maybe that’s part of the reason why these people shot to fame – they’re easy on so many levels.” True fact.

Life and Style cover courtesy of CoverAwards.

Header image thanks to Kickette.

This story came out last week, which is ages ago in gossip terms, but it’s new to me and I found it mildly amusing enough to repeat. Apparently a Spanish news outlet paid a 21 year-old woman 4,000 Euros to seduce and bed soccer/European football star Cristiano Ronaldo, 25, of Real Madrid. Ronaldo most recently made headlines for providing some post-breakup solace to Kim Kardashian, and he’s been previously linked to Paris Hilton. According to E! Online, things are getting serious for Kardashian and Ronaldo, but Kim might want to rethink her latest choice of a boyfriend. Ronaldo is not the hardest guy to get into the sack, according to this random woman who was paid to kiss and tell. What’s more is that he wooed her by telling her that “fat” women give good oral. The woman in no way looks fat. She said that Ronaldo kept the condoms in his shoe and that they only had enough to have sex two times. The third time he didn’t use a condom. She also called him well endowed.

A Spanish woman says she was paid nearly $5,500 by a Spanish media outlet to seduce and bed footballer/Armani underwear model Cristiano Ronaldo.

Naya, 21, says his performance in the sack was a 9.5 out of 10–and they romped three times on February 21 after his team’s match against Villareal. She even claims that Ronaldo is very well endowed and carries condoms in his Dolce & Gabbana sneakers, though she admitted they engaged in unprotected sex on the third encounter. So how did this average-looking role model for women manage to bed one of the most desirable sports stars? She says it’s because he believes fat chicks have God-given oral skills…

Her story (ENGLISH TRANSLATION):

“Cristiano Ronaldo told me: ‘Fat girls suck it well.’ That’s why he chose me.

“He [did] me three times… it was a 9.5, I wouldn’t say he gets 10 points.

“He carries condoms in his Dolce & Gabbana sneakers, but the third time we did it without one.

“You can’t compare Ronaldo’s abs to those of Paquirrín. Paquirrín is a sack of potatoes.

“If his [you know what] was a pizza, it would be a family-sized one.”

SPANISH TRANSCRIPT:

“Cristiano Ronaldo me dijo: ‘Las gorditas la chupan muy bien’. Por eso me escogió a mí.

“Me echó tres polvos de 9.5, por no decir de 10 puntos.

“Él llevaba los condones en sus botas tejanas Dolce&Gabbana, pero el tercero lo hicimos sin.

“No se pueden comparar los abdominales de Ronaldo con las de Paquirrín. Paquirrín es una bolsa de papas.

“Si su miembro fuera una pizza, sería una pizza familiar”.

[From Tabloid Prodigy, original Spanish language report here]

You picked yourself a real winner there, Kim. At least he practices safe sex 2/3 of the time, and that still counts, right? This woman sort of shares some similar characteristics with Kim Kardashian – she’s a brunette, she’s normal sized and she’ll gladly accept money in exchange for sharing personal information with the press. Then again, he also got with Paris Hilton several times. Maybe Ronaldo just has a taste for fame wh*res.

Famous footballer Cristiano Ronaldo got himself in quite a bit of trouble in Lisbon over the weekend. The Real Madrid player smashed in the window of a car with a teenager inside. The girl claims to have been there simply to get Ronaldo’s autograph, but he thinks he was being set up – which sounds very likely. He says the girl has been parked outside his home for days, and that she was with a man who’s variously indentified as a freelance writer and/or paparazzo.

The girl had some cuts on her and went to the hospital – posing for a photo in her hospital gown which was given and/or sold to a photo agency and used in the Daily Mail’s article. Ronaldo apologized for losing his temper, but it sounds like he has a believable defense.

This is the scene of the damage after Cristiano Ronaldo smashed a car window as he lashed out in fury at a teenage girl videoing him in the street. The 24-year-old former Manchester United star kicked the window sending shards of glass into 17-year-old student Sara Pardal, it was claimed by Portuguese media. Sara was treated in hospital for her alleged injuries and later reported the attack to the police. The teenager reportedly told police she was sat in the car outside Ronaldo’s Lisbon apartment because she is a fan and wanted an autograph.

The FIFA World Player of the Year has admitted kicking the car in a rage – but insisted the girl was working with a paparazzi photographer. He has accused her of exaggerating her injuries. Ronaldo, who has just completed his £80 million move from Manchester United to Real Madrid, said: ‘I regret what I did, but I can’t promise that I would not react in the same way again in the same circumstances.’

Ronaldo was heading to an Elton John concert in the Portuguese capital with his mum Dolores Aveiro, 54, sisters Elma and Catia, and a group of friends. The star claims the girl was with a photographer who had been stalking him, ‘standing for days on end in front of my house, eating yogurt and waiting for anything newsworthy to happen.’ He says the photographer and the girl had followed him to his house from the Ritz Hotel. When he spotted the girl filming him, he leapt out of his £200,000 Ferrari 599 GTB Fiorano in a rage and kicked the car. Ronaldo said: ‘This persecution caused my mother to be so disturbed and upset that I had to stop my car to try to convince them to leave us in peace.’

Portuguese newspaper Correio da Manha described the girl as a fan who had been trying to get an autograph of Elton John at the Ritz, then went to Ronaldo’s house hoping to meet the footballer. But rival daily 24 Horas said she was in the car with freelance photographer Hugo Martins, 35. Sara went to the Sao Jose Hospital for treatment to cuts on her arm, arriving at around 11pm on Sunday night.

If state prosecutors decide Ronaldo has a case to answer, he could face charges of wounding or destroying property. He could be ordered to pay compensation to his victim, who could also pursue a civil claim. Ronaldo claims the photographer later offered to sell him a video of the incident.

[From the Daily Mail]

The Daily Mail’s article is really long and remarkably thorough, but they document all of Ronaldo’s claims, including a long spiel about the teenager and her photographer companion trying to sell him the tape, which he claims to have refused to do out of basic ethics. Ronaldo also says he knows someone will pay for it and it will get out there, but he’s not going to be the one to do it.

It sounds like a set-up to me. Even if she was a fan, why was this girl “standing for days on end in front of [Ronaldo’s] house, eating yogurt and waiting for anything newsworthy to happen”? If nothing else, she was clearly stalking and harassing him. But it sounds like more than anything she was baiting him. I doubt she’s a fan. Hopefully the authorities will see through this crap and charge the teenager and her photographer friend instead.

Here’s Cristiano Ronaldo outside Villa nightclub in Los Angeles on June 16th. Images thanks to WENN.com .

I am not totally sure what Cristiano Ronaldo is famous for. Well, I guess it’s football, so the better statement is I’m not entirely sure why Cristiano Ronaldo is famous. I’d heard his name tossed about a few times here and there, and I’m sure part of that is because I’m an American and we don’t really do the football/soccer culture here like they do in Europe. And he is the big deal there. From what I can gather – from the auspicious sports authority The Sun, no less – Ronaldo is both talented and super hot. Well, super hot in that “he probably gets a pedicure and is waxed down there” sort of way.

Ronaldo is in the U.S. right now and hooked up with Paris Hilton. And if you weren’t a celebrity before, risking the herp with Paris will definitely make you one. It’s not like summiting some impossible mountain and you just have to try just to say you were one of the few who attempted it. Though you’d think many would be afraid to attempt it. Anyway, Ronaldo is now famous for hooking up with Paris and living to tell, which for some illogical reason means even more women are desperate to get with him. At least according to The Sun, which has some convoluted story about it. In their title it says Ronaldo hooked up with three women, but in the story he basically flirted with three women, and nothing is said about going home with any of them. That’s sort of a “Ooooh, isn’t he almost a player” type of thing.

CRISTIANO RONALDO took three sexy girls to his hotel room for a spot of dirty dancing after giving them his trademark wink. They became the latest in a string of women fans charmed by the soccer star during his US holiday — including heiress PARIS HILTON. Americans Suzanne Coppin, 32, and Allison Aimee, 26, met randy Ron 24, as he partied in his Beverly Hills hotel bar.

Allison revealed: “We had a dance-off and Cristiano excitedly said he would be the judge. We played Aerosmith’s hit Crazy and it became a sexy lapdance… . Cristiano couldn’t take his eyes off me. I felt the sparks fly as I leaned into him. Next it was Suzanne’s turn. She straddled me and pressed her chest into my face… Cristiano could not take his eyes off of her rear end. Soon she was whispering in his ear and running her hands over his chest.”

The Portuguese striker — moving from Man United to Real Madrid for £80million — was ALREADY snogging a brunette when the two girls arrived at the bar. But he pulled them as well, using the wink made famous when he got England’s Wayne Rooney sent off in the 2006 World Cup. Suzanne said: “He was kissing the girl and staring at us. He made eye contact and threw a sexy, knowing wink. He knows his effect on women.”

Allison and Suzanne said they went home at 4am, leaving Ronaldo still kissing the third girl.

[From the Sun]

At least they didn’t do that thing when the British tabloids make up quotes from Americans using a bunch of British slang. There’s a bit in the article but not in the actual quotes, so they may be legitimate. Legitimate for a story that’s basically a really detailed account of how two women danced for Cristiano Ronaldo, and he was into it. Then they went home. There’s a bit of a bittersweet melancholy to the whole thing, isn’t there?

In related news, there were a lot of reports a few days ago that Paris Hilton was back with ex-boyfriend Doug Reinhardt. It seems that wasn’t the case, or perhaps they just had a temporary hookup. But the most recent reports are still referring to her as single – and also desperately chasing after Ronaldo. Frankly from the sound of the Sun’s story, it sounds like these two are perfect for each other.

Here’s Cristiano Ronaldo enjoying the warm Southern California sunshine yesterday afternoon by the pool at his luxury hotel in Beverly Hills. I think I sort of get the interest now. Images thanks to Mavrix.